Show Me A Garden that's bursting into life
by atypical-swan
Summary: Isolated and lonely, Dr. Jasper Whitlock, Ph.D., finds himself taking a temporary position at the boarding school, Forks Academy. There he meets Edward Cullen and his tight knit group of friends and family. AU-Human. JxExB eventually. Full summary inside.
1. Title Page

Title: Show me a garden (that's bursting into life)

Author: Missa

Rating: R

Fandom: Twilight

Category: AH, AU, romance, drama, h/c, angst

Pairings: Jasper/Edward/Bella (eventually), Jasper/Edward, Emmett/Rose, Carlisle/Esme, Bella/James, Alice/OC

Summary: Isolated and unable to trust people, Dr Jasper Whitlock finds himself in Forks, WA, taking on yet another temporary teaching position at a boarding school. He meets the enigmatic yet troubled music teacher Edward Cullen and his group of friends and family. Will they be enough to teach Jasper to live again? To love?

Warnings: This story is **slash**, which means **homosexual relationships** will be mentioned! Also, this story will eventually feature a **mixed-gender threesome **in a committed relationship. If these are not your cup of tea, please move on. Contains **verbal abuse** of a major character and some **violence**.

Also, this Edward has a potty mouth.

Disclaimer: Twilight and the affiliated characters and plots are not mine. I'm merely playing in someone else's sandbox for awhile, and no profit is being made.

Chasing Cars is intellectual property of Snow Patrol.

Story Notes: This is not song fic. This song just came across my playlist shortly after I'd started working on the fic, and many lyrics just seem to fit with where I had envisioned the story going. The lyrics can be found on my profile or at .

The characters are older than in canon, since I've set most of them up with advanced degrees in their chosen fields.

Also, for the purpose of this story, Forks is a slightly bigger town, capable of supporting a few essentials, like a Target, a Borders, and a Starbucks – more of a small city than small town.

**Thank you!** to Wishingforlove (wishingforlove81ff) for being an awesome beta reader and letting me bounce my crazy ideas off you. You rock.


	2. Chapter 1: Settling In

Jasper Whitlock parked his beat up sedan in front of the administration building at Forks Academy and sat for a moment after shutting off the engine. It was his fifth school in three years since completing his PhD and sometimes he still wondered how disappointed his family would've been to know he ended up as an "academic pussy" as his father'd always termed the profession. But his military service hadn't gone the way he'd expected when 'Don't Ask Don't Tell' and a vindictive bitch caught up with him and he'd been honorably discharged after only two years into his first tour, suddenly without a career or very many prospects.

But his daddy and the Marines had taught him nothing if not to survive, so Jasper had sucked it up, taken his GI Bill and gone to college, which is how he wound up as something of an itinerant professor, subbing at boarding schools as needed. He rarely stayed more than a semester, teaching History, and moving on. In the three years since completing his PhD, he'd lived in five different states, and before arriving in Forks, Colorado was the farthest west he'd made it. He'd returned to Texas for school after his discharge, though he hadn't been sure why, with no family to speak of, other than it meant lower tuition and it felt comfortable and familiar. He'd ended up staying for the seven years it had taken him to get his education.

It was just after 9 am when he slid out of his car and headed for the entrance of the building. He had a meeting with the Dean before supper and he wanted a chance to get settled into what he was sure was another standard dorm room. He took in the grounds of the prestigious boarding school, noting clumps of students moving toward a building he clearly identified as the chapel, or, what he assumed was the dining hall. Services on campus weren't mandatory, which is one of the reasons Jasper took the assignment. He may have been a good southern boy, but he'd given up on religion when it felt like God had given up on him and his family. He ran his hand through his longish blonde hair, wondering if he should get a haircut, and deciding he didn't give a damn unless the Dean told him to.

He found the Dean's Assistant at her desk outside the Dean's office. She was a slim, petite woman with long, caramel colored hair pinned away from her face, graying at the temples. She was dressed casually for the weekend, in jeans and an Academy t-shirt and trainers.

"Mrs. Cullen?" Jasper asked, pulling her attention from the filing cabinet. "I hope I didn't keep you long, ma'am." His musings had made him even later than the accident on the interstate outside Seattle.

"Not at all, Dr. Whitlock. And please, Esme is fine," she said with a smile.

"Jasper, then," he responded, shaking her hand warmly and returning her smile, unintentionally turning up the charm, though he knew his accent usually did enough.

"Now Jasper," Esme said, reaching for a packet on her desk. "You'll be rooming with Dr. Cullen, the chemistry professor," she read off the front with a small smile and a sparkle in her hazel eyes.

"Cullen?" Jasper echoed.

"My son, Emmett," she continued. "My other son, Edward, is a music instructor here, and my husband, the i_other_/i Dr. Cullen," she teased, "Is the school physician."

Jasper nodded. It was quite a family affair. "Do you live on campus as well?"

"Oh, no," Esme said with a smile. "Staff are only required to live on campus if they're single and willing to serve as hall supervisors for the additional stipend. My husband and I own a house in town."

Jasper nodded his understanding.

"Your suite is in Spader hall, on the first floor, with Emmett. You'll share a small kitchenette and bathroom with him, but have your own living space. It's not much, but you also have an office in the humanities building. I believe you will share with Dr. Swan, one of the English professors." She paused and smiled at him, handing him the packet. "Course schedule, meal times, office hours are all in there, along with some general information about the school, student body, and other information you'll need to get settled. Spader is four buildings up the drive. There's a small faculty lot up from there - there's a map in your packet."

Jasper nodded again saying thank you. It wasn't all that different from the various academies and such he'd subbed at before. He knew there was a chance for a permanent position, but he was happy if the appointment remained temporary. He found himself enjoying the nomadic lifestyle of spending a year someplace before moving on. It kept him from making attachments that he no longer wanted, but provided him with something to occupy his time, a roof over his head, and the means to keep himself fed, clothed, and entertained.

She nodded back and smiled. "Dr. Harper will see you before dinner tonight. Sunday dinner is served at 6, and the Dean will be giving his traditional welcoming speech then. And in case Emmett forgets to mention it, we have a family supper every Saturday evening, and we'd love to have you next week."

"Thank you, Esme. We'll see how the week goes." He smiled at her again.

Esme finished getting him outfitted with everything he needed, including snapping his picture for his ID card. The card would get him into his dorm 24/7, and into academic buildings after hours, and keep him fed. It was preloaded with debit dollars to be used at breakfast and lunch and was his ticket into dinners on weeknights, Sundays, and Saturday brunch. Esme handed over his card and promised it would be activated within the hour.

"Welcome to Forks Academy Jasper," Esme said with another warm smile and returned to her filing cabinet.

Jasper returned to his car and found Spader easily enough leaving his car in the drive to unload his things. There wasn't much; two suitcases and a garment bag of clothes, a box of linens, dishes and sundries, a beat up acoustic guitar, a laptop computer, and a houseplant he hadn't yet managed to kill. There were also three banker's boxes of books he never got rid of no matter how many times he relocated. He hardly ever struck up more than acquaintances with the other faculty wherever he went, and the books tended to be his company when he wasn't teaching or looking to other duties the school assigned him. He loaded up with the clothes and found his way to his room.

A name plate had been made for him, and slid into place over the square white board mounted on the wall to the right of the door, making it easy for him to find his room in the middle of the hall. He supposed that made sense, having the two adults on the floor in the center of things. Jasper fished his key from the envelope Esme provided and let himself in.

He dropped his belongings on the bed and surveyed the small space. The room faced north, which was nice since it would mean no horrible sunrises when he wanted to sleep and no bright afternoon light warming the room too much. There was an extra long twin sized bed against the wall under the windows, a four-drawer dresser at one end, and a free standing wardrobe at the other. A door with a privacy lock led to what he assumed were the shared facilities, and there was a small table and single chair pushed up against the other wall. There were shelves on the wall about eighteen inches from the ceiling around the perimeter of the room, and a small bookcase snugged up in a corner. All in all, it was about what Jasper had expected.

Before returning to his car, he stripped off his sports jacket and tossed it on the table, taking a few minutes to rearrange things slightly. The bed he left alone, but he moved the chair and table to its foot, moving the wardrobe so it didn't block the window, and so he could use the ledge under it for additional storage if needed.

Jasper returned to his car twice more before getting all his things inside. The previous occupant had left a hook in the corner of the ceiling nearest the window and he used it to his advantage to hang his plant. Rolling up the sleeves of the light weight white oxford, he set to work unpacking, knowing it wouldn't take him long. When he reached his few dishes (a plate, bowl, coffee mug and single cup brewer, along with a few sets of silverware), he ventured into the shared kitchenette, again, finding what he expected. There was a small sink, a heating plate and microwave, with cabinets above and below for storage, and a small built in refrigerator. He peeked in and found half the cabinet space empty, and claimed it with his things, planning a trip to the grocery store for coffee and other stuff similar to his suite-mates pantry items. Across from the sink was yet another door Jasper assumed led to the bathroom facilities. He knocked before tugging the door open to a small bathroom. There was a privacy hanger on the inside of the knob, though the door locked from the inside. Someone had laid down cheery green bathmats, and the tub had a brightly patterned shower curtain to match. There were towels on half the racks, and half the space on the shelves in the bathroom was clear as well.

Either his suitemate, Emmett, was anally retentive about space, or the former one had been. Either way, Jasper shrugged and closed the door behind him as he ducked out.

He returned to his room, finding an outlet for his iHome system and setting up his iPod to play softly in the background as he sorted through his clothes. He didn't bother to unzip one garment bag, though he placed it somewhat tenderly at the back of the wardrobe, out of sight. He couldn't legally wear it anymore, but that didn't mean it wasn't something he wanted to get rid of. The rest of the wardrobe space was filled with various button up shirts, a couple of hangers of ties, and jackets. Trousers and jeans were folded into the bottom two drawers of the bureau, socks and underwear in the top two. He stashed the suitcases under his bed, moved the boxes of books to the table and made the bed with one set of linens after he put the spare set on the top shelf of the wardrobe and flattened the box to slide under the bed with the suitcases.

His bed made, he settled on it and opened his laptop, pleased to find wifi access and the necessary login information in the packet of info he'd received from Esme. He quickly logged in and saved the settings, did a quick web search for the nearest Target, and then began preparing a list of what he needed. Thankfully, Forks was a large enough town to support a super Target (which Jasper vastly preferred over Walmart), but also, he discovered as he rifled through his papers, a Border's, Starbucks, and a Whole Foods.

Figuring Target would have enough of what he needed to get started, he locked up behind him and climbed back into his car, following the brief directions he'd scribbled down from the website. Soon enough he found himself in front of the Target which was surprisingly busy for before noon on a Sunday. He grabbed a cart and began his tour around the store.

At the top of his list was to pick up a couple of lamps. He despised overhead florescent lighting, and he'd donated his last ones to students when he'd moved out of the dorms at St. Maria at the end of the previous term. The same had been true of the rug he'd used to cover the linoleum floor, so that was on his list as well. He chose a five-way standing lamp, a smaller reading lamp, and a bunch of compact florescent bulbs to fill them. Jasper picked out a simple dark blue rug with forest green edging that was similar in color to the quilt he used as a duvet. His contract at the academy was for the full academic year, and the small expense for the comfort was worth it.

In the electronics aisle he picked up a couple of iTunes gift cards, preferring to pay cash for those and redeem them than use a credit card to purchase the music online. He drifted through the books and magazines and found nothing that piqued his interest. In the garden center he found a bamboo plant in a dark blue pot that he added to his cart after a moment's thought.

Coffee found its way to the pile, as did a box of crackers, tinned soup and a few packages of ramen for late nights and weekends. A one pound bag of M&Ms would help curb his sweet tooth, and a box of granola bars would work for snacks. It would be enough to get him started until he figured out what meals were like and how flexible his schedule would be. Thankfully, he wasn't a picky eater (another thing taught to him by his daddy and the corps), and nothing he'd encountered so far had been inedible, though there was always a first time.

He passed by the cooking supplies, not needing much and figuring if his suitemate didn't have a pot or pan, then he could return or just use the microwave instead of the hot plate. His toiletries were in good order, and he didn't need any other decorations or candles or whatnot, so he made his way to the register, but not before detouring into the section with purses and wallets in search of a new umbrella. He made faces at the toddler facing him in the basket in front of him while he waited his turn, causing the little girl to giggle. When it was finally his turn, the clerk checked him out disinterestedly and Jasper found himself loading the car back up and making his way back to campus.

Another two trips from the car to his room and he was arranging his food stuffs in his half of the cabinets after spreading the rug flat, leaving the lamps boxed on the bed. He looked up when he heard the door open, and was brought face to face with a huge man, nearly as broad as the door was wide, and Jasper swore the tips of his close cut dark curly hair brushed the top of the door frame. His bright smile revealed deep dimples that matched the sparkling hazel eyes that were a dead ringer for Esme's.

"Hey, man, you must be Jasper. I'm Emmett." Emmett stuck his hand out.

Jasper took it. "Nice to meet you," he answered, giving his hand a firm shake.

Emmett leaned up against the door jamb. "You too. Getting settled in alright?"

Jasper nodded, leaning his hip against the counter. "So far. But Tuesday will be the first test, won't it?" He asked, referring to the first day of classes.

"Naw, it'll be tomorrow," Emmett said with a smirk. "Faculty orientation day. Ice breakers, catered lunch, cocktail hour at the end of it. If you can survive that, you'll be good."

"I've survived worse," Jasper answered wryly.

Emmett laughed. "I think you're gonna do fine. Got plans for tonight?"

Jasper shook his head and grinned. "Meeting with the Dean before dinner, after that, just finishing getting unpacked and getting some sleep." Or at least making the attempt of sleeping, though he hoped with a change of scenery he'd be able to put the insomnia behind him, for a short while at least.

"Well if you decide you want some company," Emmett offered, "a bunch of us get together for movies on Sunday nights. It's Alice's turn to host, which means romantic comedies and fruity drinks, but you're more than welcome to join us over in Clancy."

Jasper nodded. "I'll think about it," he responded. He'd always received similar invitations from other instructors at his previous schools, and had managed to avoid socialization. But then, he hadn't had this exact living arrangement either, and he had the feeling that Emmett could be quiet persuasive if he wanted to be.

"No problem, man. I'll let you get back to settling in, but I'll save you a spot at dinner. It'll be harder to find an empty seat for the first night, and you should really meet the gang." He pushed off the wall and snapped his fingers. "Oh, and I'm supposed to remind you about dinner at mom and dad's next weekend. I'm not supposed to let you say no."

Somehow that didn't surprise Jasper. Esme seemed, in just the short time he'd met her, the type to welcome lost souls into her family, and Jasper couldn't think of too many other people that'd fit the bill as well as he did. Some days he was surprised that he'd managed to keep his life together to the degree he had. "I'll try to remember," he promised.

"I hope you will. Esme's looking forward to adding another place to make a more regular eighth." He grinned and turned when a phone rang from the room behind him. "Nice to meet you, man," Emmett said over his shoulder as he ran for the phone, and Jasper heard "Hey, baby," before the door closed gently.

Jasper let out a quiet sigh, releasing tension he'd not really noticed building. Emmett seemed like a decent guy, very honest and up front with things. Jasper just hoped that his initial assessment was correct and that they'd be able to live peaceably together for the next year, or if nothing else, be able to cheerfully ignore each other.

Finished stowing away his food, Jasper left his adjoining door ajar and returned to his room, turning on the iPod once again to begin putting his lights together. The reading lamp went together easily, and he plugged it in next to the iHome on the window ledge above the head of his bed. The floor lamp took a bit longer to assemble, having to work with the base and the pole with the wires running through it, but he soon had it plugged in beside the wardrobe.

Having effectively killed most of the day, Jasper had an hour before his appointment with the Dean. Though he didn't really need one, he gathered his toiletries from atop the bureau and his towels from the table where he'd left them, and headed for the shower. The shower head was thankfully mounted high enough for his 6'3" frame to fit under comfortably, and he lingered under the hot water for longer than was strictly necessary, not worried about sparing the boilers for the rest of the residents.

Jasper wrapped a towel around his waist and padded back to his room, carrying his dirty clothes, frowning as he realized he didn't have anywhere to put them. He tossed them on the floor next to the wardrobe with a half-shrug, making a note to add a laundry basket to his next group of purchases. He scrubbed his hands through his damp hair as he considered what he should wear. He had no idea how formal meals were, but the meeting with the Dean beforehand dictated he should at least wear slacks and a tie.

Boxer briefs and an undershirt were quickly covered by charcoal grey slacks and a light blue shirt, with a tie that coordinated. Barefoot, he stepped back into the bathroom to hang his towels and make his hair look somewhat presentable; it had already dried into the semi-wavy-curl that plagued him when he couldn't be bothered to keep it cut short. He left his toiletries in the available space, happy to not have to carry everything back and forth in a caddy.

With his black loafers slipped on, Jasper had just enough time to make the walk across campus to the Dean's office. Grabbing his iPod from the dock, he slipped the earbuds in and placed the device in his pocket. Blue-Eyed Son's West of Lincoln was queued up, and he listened to "Step Away from the Cliff," as he made his way out of the dorm and back to the administration building where he'd started his day. It was overcast but not raining, and he was glad he'd grabbed his sport coat again since the temperature seemed to have dropped since he'd ventured out earlier. He just hoped he didn't need the umbrella he'd left behind.

Cat Power's "Help the Poor & Needy," came up next and ended just as he approached the open door of the Dean's office. Jasper slipped the earbuds out and wrapped the cord around the iPod and stuck it in his pocket before knocking.

"Come in!" A deep voice boomed from within.

Jasper ran his hand through his hair one more time, pulled himself to attention and stepped through the entrance. Dr. Harper's office looked like nearly every other Dean's office he'd ever been in. The walls were lined with bookshelves full of various books, the ceiling painted a light color to give the allusion of more height than the room had, a wall of windows looking out over the grounds behind a large mahogany desk that matched the bookshelves. A separate computer desk sat to the left of the larger desk, and two leather arm chairs, slightly facing each other, were on the opposite side of the desk.

A large rug added a touch of personality to the room, as did large plants in the far corners, one near another door that Jasper assumed to be the Dean's private washroom. There was a small, separate seating area across the room, where a tea set was already in place on the small table, and Jasper crossed to the slender African-American man who was sitting in one of the chairs.

"Ah, Dr. Whitlock, welcome." Dr. Robert Harper rose from his chair and extended his hand to Jasper. He was dressed semi-formally as well, in pressed khakis and a hunter green shirt, though no tie.

"Thank you, sir," Jasper answered, shaking the man's hand. "I'm very pleased to be here."

"Well, that's good to hear, son," Dr. Harper responded, waving Jasper to the other chair. "I'm glad you were able to join us on such short notice. Dr. Palmer's sudden retirement took us all by surprise."

Jasper nodded. He'd been called in to replace Dr. Palmer, who had taken an earlier retirement to care for his ailing wife, recently diagnosed with colon cancer. "I hope everything is alright with his wife?" he asked as he sat.

"She's doing well, according to Sam. Would you like some coffee?" Dr. Harper nodded toward the pot and china on the table between them and poured at Jasper's nod. "So, Dr. Whitlock," he said passing over the cup, which Jasper took black. "Why Forks Academy?"

Jasper took a sip of coffee and balanced the cup carefully on his knee. "The school has a great reputation, sir, and my temporary contract at St. Maria had come to end. I enjoy teaching, and I've been thankful to have the opportunity to work on so many different campuses in the last several years. Other than a short leave in Seattle, I've never spent much time in Washington, and the chance to work here seemed like the perfect opportunity to spend some more time in the area."

"You were in the Marines?"

Jasper nodded and was thankful the urge to fidget had been drummed out of him. "Yes, sir."

"Relax, son. I know why you were discharged and it has no bearing on your job here." Dr. Harper smiled softly, and Jasper could read the honesty and sincerity in his expression. "The faculty has a very diverse background, which we have found, helps further the students' education, by interacting with what some institutions would term non-traditional faculty. Most of our faculty members had other careers before joining us. Emmett Cullen, for example, was a professional football player. Alice Brandon has a female partner and still has art shows locally." Dr. Harper took a long pull from his cup. "We are a liberal campus, for a boarding school, which is why, I think, we have such a strong reputation."

Dr. Harper paused in his speaking to take another drink. "Why history, Jasper? May I call you Jasper?"

"Of course," Jasper answered automatically. Even after a few years, sometimes 'Dr. Whitlock' still caught him off guard. "I'd have to say that I chose History because of my father," he answered after a beat. "He was quite a Civil War enthusiast, active in re-enactment circles, and it was something we did together. So when I went back to school, I found that I really enjoyed history, and stuck with it. My passion still lies with the Civil War, but I really find most military history especially interesting." Jasper followed up his answer with another drink of coffee.

"Is your family still around?" Dr. Harper had settled back in his seat and Jasper found himself unconsciously relaxing as well, finding this interview much different from the ones he'd experienced before at other schools, which had all been a rehashing of his i_curriculum vitae/i_ - his educational resume; Forks Academy iwas/i different.

"No, sir," Jasper answered. "I lost my father when I was in high school, and my mother while I was in the corps." He'd lost his baby sister in the same accident that took his father. "One of the reasons this nomadic lifestyle has served me well." His smile was small and somewhat sad. There wasn't anything to tie him to any one place.

"I'm sorry to hear that." By his expression and posture, Jasper could see that he was sincere. "Now, I'm sure you've heard this before," Dr. Harper continued with a smile. "But we truly are a family here. Most of the faculty live in residence, and Sunday dinner is the one time per week the entire campus comes together. Many of the students look up to the faculty as older siblings, and we encourage that kind of relationship, between the staff as well." He drained his cup and set it on the table, looking earnestly at Jasper. "I hope that you'll find a place here."

Jasper heard Dr. Harper's unspoken message. He wouldn't be forced into anything, but he wasn't going to be allowed to hide in his room, either. "I hope so too, sir." And what surprised Jasper was that he actually meant it. Of course, he'd had similar thoughts each place he'd been since finishing his degree, but nowhere really seemed to take.

"Good!" Dr. Harper said with a bright smile, and they fell into conversation about classes, grades, and mentorship activities that Jasper would be expected to engage in throughout the year while they finished the pot of coffee. "Well, Jasper, thank you for speaking with me," Dr. Harper wrapped up. "It's nearly time for dinner, and I have a few things left to take care of." He rose and Jasper did as well, extending his hand again. "I'll see you at orientation tomorrow."

Jasper nodded, giving him a firm handshake. "Yes, sir, you will." The Dean showed him out and Jasper made his way to the dining hall. As Dr. Harper had said, Sunday dinners were the only meal that had a set time; otherwise, it was open for a couple of hours and students and faculty came and went as it fit their schedule. The temperature had dropped further and Jasper shivered, regretting not grabbing an overcoat before he'd left. Instead he stepped up his pace as he crossed the quad.

The warm air of the dining hall was a welcome relief, even if the buzz of voices was slightly disconcerting. He hadn't been around a lot of people since he'd finished the last term at St. Maria, but he took a deep breath and followed the stream of people into the queue.

The food service part of the dining hall was set up like many others he'd been in. There were several stations, each serving a different type of cuisine. There were the ever present sandwich, pizza, and cereal stations, as well as a full salad bar. Students were milling around, greeting each other and loading up their trays. There were a few parents, Jasper noted, mostly with younger students who were likely joining the student body for the first time. The youngest students were in sixth grade Jasper remembered from his review of the school, and the eldest were seniors in high school.

Jasper grabbed a tray and followed the flow of students, idly wondering how roughly 800 people were going to fit in the same place at once as he perused the selections. Pasta and steamed veggies at one station, baked chicken with mashed taters and mac and cheese at another, and what looked like stir fry options at the last. Jasper decided on chicken and macaroni and cheese, and made himself a small salad at the salad bar. After all the coffee with the Dean, he opted for water and carried his tray out into the dining hall.

Once there, he realized the building was much larger that it appeared from the other side, and the whole school could easily assemble inside. He had no idea how he was supposed to find Emmett in the crowded hall, so he just started walking, looking for a vacant place to eat the first real meal he'd had all day. But it turned out that he hadn't needed to find Emmett after all, because Emmett, quite loudly, found him.

"Yo, Jasper!" Emmett's voice carried over the din in the room when he stood, and Jasper couldn't help but grin, glad that he didn't embarrass easily anymore. He made his way toward the crowded round table and sank into the empty chair between Emmett and a pretty brunette with large brown eyes dressed in a couple layers of t-shirts and jeans. There was also a lovely blonde with sparkling blue eyes on Emmett's other side, dressed in a light sweater with a deep v-neck that emphasized her cleavage; a bouncing young woman with spiky black hair, green eyes and a perky smile, wearing a long sleeved t-shirt; and a gorgeous bronze haired man with green eyes and the most perfect features Jasper'd ever seen, clad in a dark blue polo shirt. Esme was on the bronze-haired man's other side, next to a similarly gorgeous elder gentleman that Jasper was able to deduce was her husband, the i_other_/i Dr. Cullen.

"Everyone, this is Jasper Whitlock," Emmett introduced him. "The new History professor. This," he indicated the blonde, "is Rosalie Hale, my girlfriend, and physics and math professor. The vibrating pixie there is Alice Brandon, art. Next to her is my brother Edward, music. You've met my mom, Esme, next to her is my dad, Carlisle, the school physician. Last but not least Bella Swan, literature and creative writing."

Jasper's eyes followed everyone around the table, but they lingered on Edward for a heartbeat longer than necessary. "Nice to meet you all," he said quietly, offering a shy smile as they all spoke their greetings. He spread his napkin in his lap and picked up his fork, poking at the mac and cheese.

"It's actually pretty good here," Bella said quietly beside him, her cheeks slightly pinked, but a sparkle in her deep brown eyes. "They do the comfort food pretty well."

"I'll have to take your word for it, I guess," he said with a grin and took a bite. She was right. It wasn't his mother's, but it was better than the boxed crap.

"So, Jasper, where are you from?" Alice spoke up from slightly across from him. He noticed she had vegetarian dishes on her plate.

"Texas, originally," he answered, glancing again around the table. "But I was teaching at St. Maria in Colorado last term." He cut into the chicken skeptically, and took a bite, again pleasantly surprised to find it wasn't rubbery or overly dry.

"That explains that accent," Alice said with a wink.

"Yes, ma'am," Jasper answered, surprising himself with the grin that seemed fixed to his face. Something about them was instantly welcoming, and Jasper felt more at ease with them than he had with people in a long time.

"Watch out, Alice, I think he's got your number," Rosalie teased and everyone laughed.

Conversation resumed around the table and Jasper fell comfortably quiet, soaking up the atmosphere around him as he ate. He answered questions that were directed at him, but was perfectly content to just observe. The conversations overlapped and jumped topics and it felt like a family supper rather than a meeting of faculty in a crowded dining hall. He noticed, however, that Edward seemed quiet as well, and that whenever their eyes met across the table, Edward's gaze slid away first.

"We'd better get dessert before the Dean starts," Alice said, bouncing out of her seat. It wasn't until she stood that Jasper realized how tiny she was and why Emmett had called her a pixie. He doubted she was a full five feet tall. "Who's joining me?"

Bella moved to stand and Jasper pulled her chair back for her out of habit. She smiled softly at him, laying her napkin on the table. Emmett jumped up next to him and pulled Rosalie up by her hand, and Esme stood after Carlisle held her chair for her, leaving Edward and Jasper alone at the table. Jasper settled back in his chair, extending his legs in front of him under the table, crossing them at the ankles, resting his hands lightly in his lap. Edward was sitting slightly hunched over, and Jasper could see his fingers moving lightly against the table.

Edward looked up suddenly, his green eyes fixed on Jasper's for a long moment, almost as if he was trying to sense what Jasper was thinking. Jasper refused to look away first, letting Edward seek what he was looking for, his fingers never ceasing their movement against the wooden table top. Something seemed to pass between them in that moment, and Jasper saw something familiar in Edward's eyes, something that he'd seen reflected back at him in the mirror when he shaved each morning. Jasper wondered if Edward felt that same longing emptiness that Jasper did, and wondered if so, what he did to fill that empty dead spot within him.

All too soon Edward's eyes shifted away as Alice danced back toward their table, two small plates balanced in one hand, and two cups of coffee in the other. She set one of the plates and mugs in front of Edward, who nodded his thanks. The others were a few steps behind her, and Jasper reached for Bella's chair once again on instinct, only to find that she hadn't returned with the others.

"Where's Bella?" Edward asked before Jasper had a chance, and he was frowning slightly, a line having appeared between his brows.

"James called," Rosalie said bitterly and the mood over the group instantly shifted to something heavy as they all glanced between each other, looks of concern on their faces.

Jasper said nothing as they resumed their seats, taking in the tray Emmett had carried back loaded with four dessert plates and a large glass of milk, while Rosalie had carried her own single plate and coffee. His eyebrows rose as he realized that his suitemate was going to eat that all himself.

"Hey, I work out," Emmett said in response to Jasper's look, and the mood shifted once again as the table laughed.

"There's a gym on campus?" Jasper asked, curious. He hadn't seen any information in his packet.

Emmett nodded. "I try to get in an hour a day, when possible. Wanna join me? I usually go before classes in the morning with Edward. Sometimes the girls join us for Cardio."

Jasper shrugged. "Sure." He'd missed regular workouts over the summer holidays.

"Awesome," Emmett said with a bright grin.

"Sorry 'bout that," Bella said when she returned, a plate and a mug of tea in her hands. Jasper held her chair while she sat. The sparkle seemed to have vanished from her eyes, though she kept her smile firmly in place. Jasper wondered who James was and what he's said that upset her.

No one had a chance to say anything as the Dean appeared at the lectern at the front of the hall. His voice came over the sound system in the room, allowing even the students in the back to hear him, even if he couldn't be seen.

"Good evening, members of the Forks Academy family," Dr. Harper's voice boomed out through the sound system. "It is my pleasure to welcome everyone back once again for the start of a new academic year. Among you there are new students, some away from home for the first time, some who have transferred here from other schools. Most of you are returning to your family here, and to all of you I wish you the best of luck in your studies and other endeavors this year."

He paused while the room erupted in applause, patient looks on most faces telling Jasper that this was something of a repeat. "We have some exciting things happening this year," he went on to say. "We are very proud to announce that we will be guest hosting the Seattle and Portland Symphonies this year, and offering master classes to our music students."

Applause surrounded Jasper again and he noticed that Esme looked particularly proud as she gave Edward a half-hug in response to the announcement.

"We're also going to be honored with visits from several notable authors who will not only be sitting on a few of Professor Swan's creative writing classes, but will also be giving readings and workshops while in the area."

Bella blushed at the mention of her name, but smiled.

"We hope that, under the guidance of Coaches Miller and Cullen, the football team will once again work toward the playoffs this season, and we're all hoping for a shot at the state championship."

Loud catcalls tore through the hall, with Emmett taking part alongside all the students, making Jasper and everyone at the table laugh, though Rosalie cuffed Emmett in the back of the head.

The Dean continued for another few minutes, listing accolades and goals for the upcoming school year, somehow managing to say something about every department, including Jasper's new home in History. Apparently they would be hosting a couple of notable scholars as part of an ongoing lecture series. The donors to the school were generous, and enabled the Academy to draw a lot of outside scholars to participate in activities to enrich the students' learning experience. It was no wonder that it was one of the top rated boarding schools in the country. Jasper wondered briefly what he possibly had to offer such an expectant student body and he wondered if he'd make it to Winter Break, let alone the end of his contract in June.

"So, students, faculty, staff, and parents, I warmly welcome you to Forks Academy for another fantastic year," the Dean concluded his speech to thunderous applause. Jasper joined the rest of the crowd in standing, catching Bella when she stumbled slightly into him as she rose with an embarrassed flush and a quiet thanks.

The applause eventually died down and everybody resumed their seats for at least a few minutes as the noise level resumed at one of a large hall of people speaking.

"So, movie night?" Alice asked cheerfully.

"Not for us, I'm afraid," Carlisle answered. "It's getting late for us old folks."

"Uncle Carlisle, you're not old!" Alice protested with a bright grin as Esme rose after Carlisle held her chair and began making her rounds.

"Compared to you lot we are," he said with a wink as Esme kissed Edward's cheek, then Alice's. He gave Edward's shoulder a squeeze and kissed the top of Alice's head before moving on to Rosalie while Esme spoke quietly in Bella's ear before giving her a kiss on the cheek as well. They said their farewells to everyone and Jasper was not left out of the loop, though he was thankful that Esme had not declared enough intimacy yet to kiss him. She gave him a half hug when he rose respectfully for her.

"We'll see you Saturday, Jasper," Esme said with a smirk.

"Yes, ma'am," he answered and Carlisle laughed.

"Good boy," he said, clasping Jasper's shoulder. "It was nice to meet you, Jasper. I hope this group doesn't get you in too much trouble."

Carlisle's comment was met with a round of protests from the table and he and Esme left to laughter, his arm around her waist. They were very clearly still very much in love with each other.

"So?" Alice asked again.

"We're in," Emmett said, speaking for himself and Rosalie, Jasper presumed.

"Sure," Edward agreed with a shrug.

"Bella? Jasper?" Alice looked between them expectantly.

Jasper was torn. He mostly wanted to go hide and prepare himself for the next day, however, he'd found himself with a group of people that had welcomed him instantly and made him feel comfortable, and he longed for that feeling to continue. There was also something about the music teacher that Jasper felt drawn to, and he wasn't going to pass up an opportunity to spend more time with him. "Sure," he decided. "Let me just run back and change first?" If he was going to lounge around watching movies, he wanted to be comfortable doing it.

"Yay!" Alice squealed, sounding more like one of their students than one of the faculty and the others just laughed.

"I'd like to Alice, but James is coming off shift and he wants to see me," Bella said quietly, in a tone that was somewhat flat.

At the way Edward's eyes narrowed across from him, Jasper knew that was a loaded statement, though the gentle hesitation in Bella's voice had indicated the same thing. Jasper recognized that tone, having used it himself when he was much younger. Suddenly he knew what had driven the spark from Bella's eyes earlier and his heart went out to her. Knowing they'd share office space and have a chance to speak at some point, Jasper lightly took her hand as she rose and met her wide brown eyes, hoping she could see that spark of recognition in his own. She nodded and smiled softly as he squeezed her fingers, and then she said her goodbyes and headed out.

Jasper caught Edward looking at him curiously as the others rose. They seemed to have a kind of silent conversation in that stare as Jasper nodded to whatever thought was making Edward's brow furrow again.

"I'm sorry?" Jasper turned to Alice, who had danced up next to him and grabbed his hand.

"I isaid/i Edward can walk you back to your dorm, so he can show you the way to mine, if that's alright? Emmett's going to take Rose by her room and we'll meet back up in mine in about 20?" There was a mischievous glint in her green eyes.

"Sure, that's fine, if Edward doesn't mind." He gave her a small smile.

"Not at all," Edward spoke up.

Jasper gathered the trays, and he noticed that Edward moved somewhat awkwardly, having to hold to the back of the chairs around the table at first while Alice carried their trays and he remained empty handed. Jasper noticed only because it went against his instincts to let a woman lift and carry things unnecessarily. It was only when they stepped away that he noticed the awkward gait, and the cane he used in his left hand, and the way he leaned upon it heavily.

They carried the trays with the dirty dishes to the conveyer system on their way out. Alice pranced away with a wave, and Emmett and Rosalie strolled off, his arm around her waist toward her building. Jasper and Edward walked next to each other back toward Spader, Jasper's hands shoved into his pockets.

"So, uhm," Edward started, running his right hand through his messy bronze hair. "What was that with Bella?"

Jasper's fingers twitched in his pockets and he felt like he wanted a cigarette, though he'd (mostly) quit smoking when he'd left the corps. "James abuses her?"

Edward shot him a look. "We suspect so, but she's never said anything."

Jasper sighed, frowning at the thought of someone hurting another person, and at watching his breath condense in front of him. It shouldn't have been that cold already.

"How did you know?" Edward asked, fishing in his pocket and drawing out a semi-crushed pack of Marlboro's. He tapped one out and offered the pack to Jasper while retrieving a lighter from his other pocket, causing him to limp more pronouncedly as the cane dangled from his forearm as he used both hands.

Jasper hesitated only a beat before accepting the offering, handing the pack back when Edward offered the lighter and Jasper took a long drag and sighed again, exhaling smoke easily through his nose. "When she said he wanted to see her tonight," he answered Edward's question. "It was pretty easy to read between the lines with everyone's reactions."

Edward nodded around his own cigarette. "None of us really like him, though to be fair, we've not really given him a chance, since he never accepts our invitations to group activities. I don't trust him." He'd resumed using the cane after tucking away the pack and lighter.

"You guys do a lot together?" Jasper hadn't intended to change the subject so drastically, but if they had kept on their current line of conversation, Jasper surely wouldn't get any sleep.

"I guess, yeah. We're a pretty tight group. My mom adopted Bella, so to speak, and Rose and Emmett have been seeing each other for years," Edward said as they walked.

"How long have you been teaching here?" Jasper asked, dropping his butt and crushing it under his heel.

Edward sighed and ran his free hand through his hair again, his jaw clenching. "Two years. Emmett and Rose have been here for three, and Alice and Bella started the same time I did. I guess it's easy to see how we all fell in together, especially with Alice, Em and I being family," he said with a small smile. "Throw in my parents, and we've got a bit of a dynasty here."

"Must be nice, though," Jasper said absently, fishing for his keys as they reached the building. "Having family so near."

Edward shrugged. "It can get a bit overwhelming, too. But yeah, I suppose it is nice being able to count on them."

Jasper nodded. He remembered feeling stifled by his parents when he was a younger man, not realizing until it was too late that they'd only had his best interests at heart. He unlocked his door when they reached it and ushered Edward inside. "Have a seat," he offered as he went to his bureau and retrieved a favorite pair of worn jeans.

"So what about you, Jasper?" Edward asked, his melodic voice easily filling the space. "Any friends or family?"

Jasper smiled softly, though his back was to Edward as he quickly toed out of his shoes and carried his jeans into kitchenette, leaving the door cracked open. "No, not really. I've moved around too much to make many friends, and I don't really have any family," he answered as he changed from his trousers to his jeans. He knew what Edward was really trying to ask, but he wasn't going to give him the easy way out. He buttoned the fly and padded back into the room to see that Edward had drifted toward his bookshelf and was looking over the titles.

"Sounds lonely," Edward responded absently, running his finger along the spines of Jasper's books.

Jasper shrugged. "It's been my life for awhile now." He grabbed a sweater and tugged it on, slipping back into his loafers and grabbing his trench coat from the closet.

"Well, Esme's adopted you, so I think you can safely say that life's behind you now." Edward straightened and flashed Jasper a gorgeous crooked smile.

Jasper returned it. "It certainly appears that way." He slipped into his jacket and they stepped out, Jasper locking the door behind him.

**hr**

Edward knew he had to have had come off as slightly bi-polar with the way he'd acted at dinner, and then opening himself up for conversation with Jasper on the walk back to the dorm. He'd been fairly withdrawn at the meal, but when he'd been introduced to the new history professor, a melody had popped into his head that he'd had to try to figure out so it didn't drive him even more mental than he already was. It probably hadn't been the best first impression, but his family was well used to his odd behavior, and Jasper hadn't seemed to mind, being just as quiet as Edward had been.

But the way Jasper had reacted to Bella had surprised Edward. He'd met Jasper's eyes across the table, thinking to himself he needed to ask how the hell Jasper had been able to tell something was off in her relationship with James when he'd just fucking met her. When Jasper had nodded in response to his unspoken thought, Edward had found himself wondering just how the fuck the other man seemed to know what he was thinking.

Edward knew he'd surprised Alice at accepting her request to walk Jasper back. Hell, he'd surprised even himself. What surprised him even more was the way he'd somehow managed to ask Jasper if he was seeing anyone, though the answer he received made him smile. He apparently hadn't been as subtle as he'd thought. Once Jasper had changed, they started their way back to Clancy and Alice's room.

Edward limped along, noticing that Jasper had altered his stride so they were on pace together. "So, Jasper," Edward said, watching his breath coalesce in front of him. "Tell me a bit more about yourself."

Jasper shrugged. "Not much to tell. Grew up in Texas, joined the Marine's out of high school, got discharged, went back to school, got my Ph.D., and have been bouncing around at various boarding schools since I finished three years ago."

"You seem young to have gotten that all done so fast," Edward thought aloud.

"Yeah – I didn't get a full tour in with the Corps. I was discharged on the cusp of my third year."

Edward glanced over at the blonde and saw his jaw clenched tightly and he knew this was something Jasper didn't want to talk about. "Still, you got your undergrad and Ph.D. work completed in, what, seven years? That's impressive," he said after quickly doing the math in his head.

"Not really," Jasper said dismissively. "I didn't have to work, so I finished my undergrad stuff in three years by doubling up on credits, and since I wasn't worried about money, I was able to focus on my dissertation and get done quickly."

Edward nodded. He'd watched Emmett go through the whole process after ruining his shoulder playing football, and it hadn't been an easy one. Edward had been thinking about going back for his own advanced degree, but he was content at Forks Academy and wouldn't need anything higher than his Bachelor's in Performance and Education with his professional reputation. Still, the thought came up every so often that he could get back into the program at UW with little trouble, especially since he was still in contact with much of the faculty there.

"I don't know. You should have seen all the stops the family pulled out to convince Emmett to finish." Edward laughed quietly, thinking of all the begging, cajoling, and promising his family had done to get Emmett to be more than All But Dissertation (ABD).

"Not that he had any reason to lie to me, but the Dean said Emmett used to play professional ball?" Jasper asked.

Edward nodded. "Yeah. He was a bit of a hometown hero. Played for the Seahawks until he blew out his shoulder. He had all the surgery and the PT, but it never got back to where he needed it to play. Instead of taking the coaching position he decided to go back to school. Teaching has turned out to be a fall back career for us kids," he said lightly, though it stung a little bit that he wasn't able to perform professionally anymore. "But mom likes having us all in the same place again, and where she can keep an eye on us," he teased. "Emmett's happy here, though. He still gets to coach, and I think he honestly likes coaching the kids better than the pros. He's also very proud of his 'not just a dumb jock' status and every once in awhile goes around insisting everyone call him Dr. Cullen." Edward laughed some more. "He's really just a big kid, which is why he gets along so well with the students."

Edward wasn't sure why he was rambling on about his brother, but he had a feeling that it was because Emmett was a safe topic, neutral, after a few tense moments they'd already had in the conversation.

"He sounds like it," Jasper said. "I think we're going to get along alright."

"You should. You're much more laid back than the last guy he had to share a suite with. Emmett eventually gave up and quit trying to keep Dr. Shaw from organizing his pantry."

Jasper chuckled. "I noticed that when I was unpacking, today. Everything seemed very… structured."

Edward returned the laugh. "Yeah, that was Kenobi."

Jasper shot him a look. "Seriously?"

Edward nodded. "Dr. Kenobi Shaw taught Japanese language and history last semester. Apparently his parents were pretty die hard Star Wars fans."

"No shit," Jasper muttered. "And I thought Jasper was bad."

Edward laughed quietly as they approached Clancy, but happened to think his name fit him, but having had to deal with a rather old fashioned name himself, he could sympathize. He led Jasper inside. "Go on ahead," he said when they reached the stairs. "She's in room 220, in the middle. I'll be right behind you." It was thankfully a low-pain day and he could manage the stairs.

"It's alright," Jasper said, and once more they matched pace as Edward slowly made his way up the flight of stairs.

They reached the landing for Alice's floor in a few minutes, and Edward was pleased to find he wasn't winded, though his leg hurt just a bit more from the exertion. His workouts with Emmett were keeping him in better shape than he'd thought.

"You're here!" Alice cheered when she threw open the door before they'd had a chance to knock. "Come in, come in."

It had been awhile since Edward had been in Alice's room and she'd redecorated. Gone were the frilly pinks, purples and butterflies. In their place Edward found dark blue, grey, black, and white and simple geometric patterns.

"Whoa, Alice. This is – different." Edward personally didn't think it was quite her, but he liked it.

"Yeah, I know," she said, glancing around. "I had a whim. I don't know – I'm giving it a month."

"I like it," Jasper said, likewise looking around.

"I thought you might," Alice said. "You seem like a guy who appreciates clean lines and simple designs."

Jasper shrugged. "I have no idea what that means, but thanks?"

Edward chuckled at Jasper's bewildered response and Alice giggled.

"Come on," she said, waving them toward the adjoining doors. "Em and Rose should be here any minute."

Edward had forgotten that Alice didn't have a suitemate and had turned the adjoining room into a media room/art studio, though she did most of her work in a studio in the art department or the space she had downtown.

"Alice this is incredible," Jasper said.

On the long wall she'd mounted a flat panel TV. The bed was made up like a sofa and there were two plush love seats flanking it. The extra wardrobe and such had been moved to Alice's bedroom. The table had been left near the center of the seating space as a kind of coffee table. She 'd hung dark curtains over the windows to supplement the blinds, and party lights were strung all over the room.

"I know!" Alice bounced. "What can I get you, Jasper? Beer, wine, something from the bar?"

Jasper grinned. "Beer's fine."

Alice glanced at Edward, silently asking him if he was drinking. He nodded and she danced away, returning a moment later with two bottles and a glass of white wine.

Edward accepted his bottle and took his normal spot on the bed/couch, tucking one of the decorative pillows behind his back as he leaned up against the wall. Jasper walked around slowly, taking in the art that Alice had hung over the blank spaces on the wall.

"Hey all!" Emmett voice carried over from the other side of the suite.

"We're over here, Em!" Alice called back, moving toward her DVD rack. "Grab what you want on your way through."

A moment later Emmett and Rosalie appeared, Emmett with a beer, Rose with a glass of the same white Alice had.

"What're we watching?" Emmett asked, flopping down into one of the loveseats, tugging Rose onto his lap.

"La!" Alice held up a DVD cover and Edward and his brother groaned.

"Not again," Emmett pouted at Alice's display of Dirty Dancing.

"Yes, again. My room, my first pick, them's the rules!" Alice marched right up to Emmett and waved the case in his face.

Emmett held his hands up in surrender. "Fine, pixie. You just wait until it's my turn," he threatened.

"Psh," Alice dismissed the threat and crossed back to the DVD player to get the movie set up. "Jasper, cop a squat wherever. Edward doesn't bite," she said with a giggle.

Jasper nodded, but folded himself into the loveseat rather than join Edward on the bed. Edward watched as he stretched his long legs in front of him, a position much more comfortable in the chair than on the bed. Alice joined Edward after returning from shutting off the lights in the other room and making sure the door was locked.

They all took turns mocking the movie at some point, though Alice pouted at them. When it was over, they watched a random generic comedy that they all enjoyed.

"Well, I think I need to head home. Jasper, you ready?" Emmett asked.

"Yeah." Jasper rose and stretched. "Alice, thanks for the hospitality and the beer. Rose, Edward, it was nice meeting you."

"You too, Jasper," Rose answered, swirling the last bit of wine in her glass.

"I'll see you tomorrow," Edward answered. He wasn't completely comfortable with the idea of Jasper joining the work out in the morning, but he'd find a way to cope. He knew how hard it could be to be alone in a new place, and Edward didn't want to begrudge the man the friendships he could find. He'd deal with it in the morning.

Emmett and Jasper left together, and Rosalie left for her room downstairs a few minutes after them, but not before helping Alice clean up the few dishes they'd dirtied first.

"You want to crash here, Edward?" Alice offered.

He considered the offer for a moment. If he slept at Alice's he'd have to get down the stairs on an even stiffer leg without the benefit of pain killers, and he'd have to get up even earlier to make it to the gym.

"No, I think I'll go home," he decided.

"Okay, well, let me see you out?"

Edward knew Alice had only his best interests at heart and he nodded, levering himself up.

"Thanks for coming over tonight, Edward. It's good to see you with a bit of spark back in your eyes," Alice said as they made their way slowly down the stairs (a much more perilous trip than up). "That wouldn't have anything to do with a certain blonde haired blue eyed history professor, would it?"

"Alice," Edward warned.

She laughed, clapping her hands lightly. "Oh, Edward, that's fantastic. He is very handsome."

"Alice, I met the man six hours ago. Don't you dare start in on your match making schemes already." Alice seemed to see things that others missed, and it had given her an unhealthy penchant for setting up relationships.

"Alright, I'll give you some time," Alice promised with a bright grin. "But if I don't see progress…"

Edward rolled his eyes and they reached the bottom of the stairs.

"See you tomorrow, Edward." Alice tiptoed up and kissed his cheek.

"Night, Alice," Edward answered, kissing the top of her head before she bolted back up the stairs, making him a little jealous of her mobility. With a sigh he stepped out into the cold evening and walked as briskly as possible to his dorm. He shoved his right hand into his pocket as he walked, casting his thoughts back to the newest member of their little gang. There was something in Jasper that Edward recognized in himself, a distrust of people and an inherent loneliness. He'd slid into place easily enough though, and Edward knew that as Alice kept roping him into group activities he'd become just another member. Between his cousin and his mother, his family kept expanding with all the strays they picked up.

When he made it back to his room, Edward made quick work of preparing for bed, laying out his gym clothes and pain medication for the morning and setting his alarm before he removed his contacts and changed into pajamas. Normally, he read for awhile before falling asleep, but he was tired enough that he was asleep nearly immediately after climbing into bed.


	3. Chapter 2: Faculty Orientation

Note: Thanks for all the reviews so far! Sorry for the delay in updating. I try to update everything together, and it took a bit longer for validation over on Twilighted than I thought.

I started a blog for this, and my other stories. Please check it out at http: // reallifebandgeek . blogspot . com

* * *

**Faculty orientation**

Jasper woke, as always, to the first sounds of his alarm. It never mattered how late he was out, he always woke to the buzzer and was rarely able to sleep again after, if he managed to get to sleep in the first place.

Fortunately, movie night at Alice's hadn't gone too late. They'd watched two movies and Jasper'd found himself back in his dorm by 12:30, with the promise to meet Emmett for the gym at 6. The evening had gone surprisingly well. Alice had only made them suffer through one chick flick before they watched a more general comedy, and Emmett had been wrong about the foofoo drinks – Alice had had a nice selection of beer and wine. Without a suitemate, Alice had converted the adjoining room into something like a media center, which had made the evening much more comfortable than if he'd been hosting. He'd walked back to the dorm with Emmett, falling into easy conversation about nothing important before falling into bed, content enough that he was actually able to get some sleep.

As he'd drifted off the night before, he'd pondered the differences in Edward's behavior at dinner and then at the walk and while they watched movies. He seemed much more self conscious in the dining hall, surrounded by strangers, Jasper decided. Even one on one with Jasper Edward had seemed more relaxed and himself, despite having just met. It was an enigma to Jasper, but not completely so. He could understand the need to erect a public persona, to protect oneself even when there was a barrier of friends and family between said self and the public. That mask had dropped off when Edward was alone with the group, and Jasper found himself even more drawn to him.

The pleasant musings and distant sounds of rain had helped lull him to sleep quicker than he could remember, and for once, his dreams had been peaceful.

He switched the alarm off and rose, peeking out the windows. It looked to be another dreary day, though from what he'd come to understand, that was normal for the area; the rainiest place in the continental US. Joy.

He dug out a pair of sweat pants and a long sleeved tee and dressed quickly, stepping into his trainers as Emmett knocked on the adjoining door.

"Morning," he rumbled, in a t-shirt and shorts. "Ready?" He didn't look quite awake yet, and the one word questions kind of reinforced that.

Jasper just nodded. He grabbed his key and iPod and led Emmett through to his door and out into the hall. The building was quiet, and Jasper knew that the students would be embracing the last chance to sleep in before classes started the next morning.

They walked quickly through the chilly morning, an easy silence between them. Jasper appreciated that Emmett wasn't a complete morning person who expected every moment to be filled with noise. They reached the gym facilities and Emmett got him a key and showed him where everything was. The facilities were open for faculty 24/7, but students only had access between 10 and 10, when there was staff on duty.

Edward was already waiting when Jasper followed Emmett into the weight room, sitting on the floor in sweats and a t-shirt, doing some stretches quietly.

"There's a cardio room next door," Emmett explained. "And a lap pool down the hall. Dr. Marx teaches yoga in the evenings a few times a week that the girls and sometimes Eddie do, and sometimes we do spin classes with Dr. Stevens."

Edward growled softly from his place on the floor, and Jasper wasn't sure if it was the nickname or the revelation of their schedule that set him off. "Seems like a lot for a school gym," Jasper commented.

Emmett shrugged. "We don't have formal PE for the upper classes, so we try to keep interesting offerings for those who want them. And it's a nice perk for the faculty."

Jasper nodded.

"We usually do strength training on Mondays, Wednesdays, and Fridays," Emmett continued. "But don't feel like you need to stick with our schedule." He nodded toward Edward, who was struggling to his feet, looking extremely self-conscious and awkward and all but radiating his anxiety.

Jasper nodded again. "I'll join you in a bit," he said, sensing Edward's need to not be observed in what was likely rehab in disguise. "I could use a good run to warm up and clear my head for today." He took the towel Emmett had provided him and stepped out, going to the next door down the hall and finding an empty room filled with various cardio equipment.

He set his iPod to a high energy playlist, set the program on the treadmill to run for five miles, and lost himself in the rhythm of the music and his steps hitting the conveyor belt. He tried to clear his thoughts, but they betrayed him, returning over and over to Edward Cullen, and whether or not he'd resented Jasper's intrusion on the workout session. But then, Jasper reflected, it wasn't like he hadn't heard Emmett invite him, either. Perhaps he was just self conscious about his disability. Jasper forced himself to let go of the questions that followed that thought, about what had caused the limp, and made himself focus on the music until he felt the machine slow to a walk for the cool down and then shut down completely.

Using his towel, he wiped down the control panel and handles before spreading his towel on an empty space in the floor for a round of crunches. When he finished, grimacing at the way his t-shirt stuck to his back, he noticed a tall, fit, strawberry blonde woman watching him in the mirrors from the elliptical. He could see the cover of a gossip magazine reflected in the mirror, and her eyes followed him as he gathered his keys and towels and left.

The run had killed twenty-five minutes, so Jasper returned to the weight room. Emmett was barking out instructions to a frustrated and pissed off looking Edward, who was working on his legs. Jasper couldn't hear the words being exchanged over his music, but crossed to the other side of the room, intent on working his upper body and core to give them the allusion of privacy for the last thirty-five minutes of the agreed upon session. He tried not to look like he was watching Edward, admiring the way his t-shirt clung to his body or the way his face was flushed with exertion and emotion, but he was pretty sure he failed. Besides, he caught Edward looking at him just as much.

He moved from station to station, doing enough reps to keep him in shape, not looking to bulk up. He'd never really taken to lifting the way some of his past friends had, but he liked the ache that came with a good workout. He'd been fortunate to have good genes, and he honestly just enjoyed the rhythm of the workout and the distraction it provided. Lacking a spotter, he avoided the bench press and lost himself in his workout until Emmett stepped in front of him, trying to get his attention.

"Edward's done," he explained. "I can spot you, if you'd like."

True enough, Jasper looked beyond his hulk of a suitemate and found Edward limping slowly to the door, towel over his shoulder.

"Sure," he answered, and told Emmett to load on 75 pounds to total 97.

"Thanks for that," Emmett said quietly, loading the weights while Jasper settled on the bench.

"No problem," he answered, thinking he might want a pair of gloves if he continued to lift regularly. He didn't pretend to misunderstand Emmett's statement.

"I hadn't thought, really," Emmett continued, positioning himself behind Jasper's head. "He's still really – weird – about the whole thing."

"How long?" Jasper ground out as he lifted the bar from the rack.

"Three years."

Jasper focused on Emmett's face as he moved the bar to his chest, then back up. His friend frowned and Jasper could practically feel the sadness for his brother.

"He was something of a local celebrity, before the accident," Emmett continued to speak while Jasper listened and counted his reps. "Different date every week, when he wasn't touring. They were all empty, though, no real relationships, since he wouldn't let anyone but his family close, even then. Then the accident, and I honestly thought we were going to lose him there for awhile, and not to his injuries."

Jasper finished his set and rested the bar back in the clamps, then sat up and reached for his towel, turning to face Emmett.

"It's taken us a long time to get him back this far," Emmett said softly, sadly, and Jasper wondered if Emmett even realized he was still there. "Bella helped. But y'know, I've never seen him take to anyone as easily as he did to you." Emmett met Jasper's eyes. "It usually takes him a bit longer to be willing to be alone with someone like he was with you last night, especially walking. I think it helps that you kind of know not to push or make a big deal out of things."

Jasper shrugged and rose. "He's a quiet person and likes his privacy, that's easy enough to see." But he was touched to know that he'd already had some impact on the man's life. Maybe his time in Forks would do someone good, at least.

"Good looking, too," Emmett teased.

Jasper rolled his eyes and Emmett's booming laugh filled the room. He inwardly smiled at how easily the man could switch moods, and seemed to just say what was on his mind. He found that honesty refreshing, though he was slightly troubled to know how observant Emmett had to be to have picked up on Jasper's subtle ogling of Edward.

"So, it didn't like you did much _work_, there," Jasper said as they gathered their things and started back to the dorms.

Emmett shook his head. "When we do strength training, I play trainer. But I usually go back during an 'office hour'," he made the quote gesture with his fingers, "to get my work out in."

Jasper nodded. "It's good of you to do that for him."

Emmett just grinned and shrugged. "He's my brother."

The walk back was filled with more causal talk. They had to be at the library at 9 am for orientation, so Jasper agreed to meet Emmett (and presumably everyone else) at the dining hall. Jasper got the shower first since Emmett wanted to take a quick jog to Rosalie's dorm. Jasper watched him go with a smirk.

Jasper showered, having come to understand through conversation with Emmett that the décor had been Esme's doing, again lingering under the hot water. Wrapped in a towel, he filled his coffee mug and popped it in the microwave while he dressed.

Semi-casual was the theme for the day according to Emmett, so jeans and a polo shirt seemed to fit the bill, along with his worn out Chuck Taylor's that he'd had for years. He heard Emmett come home while he fixed his coffee and slid out of the way to give him access to the shower.

Jasper perched on the window ledge and stared outside while he drank his coffee, watching the campus slowly come to life, though classes wouldn't start for another day. Students had schedules to settle and last minute affairs to see to, and the slowly increasing traffic on campus was evidence to that. Jasper had a feeling that the upcoming week would be one of organized chaos.

When he finished his coffee, he rinsed the mug, pulled on a hoodie, stuffed his laptop back in the bag and slung it across his body. He stuffed the umbrella he'd purchased the day before into one of the pockets on his bag and double checked that he had everything he thought he could possibly need before locking his room and heading for the dining hall.

When he arrived, he found the dining hall quiet, for the most part. The hot station was open with eggs, bacon, sausage, pancakes and waffles already prepared, and a cook behind the line for special orders. There were other offerings available, yogurt, cereal, various breads and fruit. Jasper grabbed a plate of scrambled eggs and bacon, toast, fruit, another cup of coffee and a glass of orange juice. He carried his tray into the dining room, looking around for familiar faces. He spotted a familiar head of bronze hair and wound his way through the tables.

"Good morning, ladies. Edward," he greeted Alice, Bella, and Edward. He took a seat next to Edward, across from Bella. Alice sat on Edward's other side.

Bella smiled at him around her cup of hot tea, a half-empty bowl of oatmeal with raisins on her tray. "Good morning," she said softly.

Edward nodded his greeting, poking at his own breakfast of a bagel and cup of fruit. It appeared he was fishing out the chunks of melon from the mix and leaving the rest behind.

"Hi Jasper!" Alice flashed him a bright grin, reaching around Edward to steal a piece of bacon off Jasper's tray.

"Hey!" He protested, but winked at her.

"Gotta watch out for her an' Emmett," Bella advised. "Alice may be tiny, but she eats more than anyone besides Emmett." She laughed and ducked as a piece of toast was flung at her from Edward's other side.

Jasper grinned and started on his own breakfast, letting Alice and Bella's conversation wash over him. He sampled his eggs, and before he could ask, Edward slid the hot sauce, salt, and pepper over toward him. Jasper nodded his thanks and doctored his eggs to his liking. Out of the corner of his eye he saw Alice spear a pineapple chunk from Edward's plate.

Emmett and Rosalie arrived a few minutes later, Emmett's tray loaded much like Jasper's, only with twice the quantity of everything, while Rosalie settled down to a yogurt cup, fresh fruit, and what looked like an egg white omelet. Emmett sat next to Bella and his girlfriend settled on his other side. Once more, conversation flowed easily, Jasper responding when someone addressed him, but he noticed that he and Edward remained mostly comfortably quiet, watching the others as they ate.

"Dr. Swan?" A timid voice broke in. Jasper looked up from his coffee to see a small young sandy-blond young man at Bella's shoulder, dressed in jeans and an unbuttoned shirt over a solid colored tee. He shifted nervously on his feet.

"Yes?" Bella turned to the student. "Oh, Tim. What can I do for you?"

"Um. Sorry to interrupt," Tim said, glancing around the table. "But I need your signature to add into the novel writing class this semester." He handed her a slip of paper and a pen.

"You're sure you have the time to commit to this again this semester?" she asked, the pen poised over the paper. "I don't want to have to convince the Dean to let you drop again. If I add you this time, you have to get through the whole course."

Jasper watched as Tim bit his lip and nodded. "My parents want me to take it easy this year, and I'm not cleared for physical activity, so I'm able to focus more on academics. I really would like to take this class, Dr. Swan. I want to be able to write about what happened, and I think your class would be the best way to start."

Bella looked into the student's face and nodded, signing the slip. "It's good to have you back, Tim."

The kid beamed. "Thanks, Dr. Swan. Sorry again for bothering you at breakfast." He gave the table a hesitant wave and took off.

Bella sighed softly, and Jasper noted a sad look in her eyes. He wondered what the kid's story was, and made a note to ask her later.

"Does that happen a lot?" Jasper asked. "Getting requests like that at meals?" He wondered what Tim had meant about telling his story some day.

"The first week, yeah," Rosalie explained. "It's sometimes the easiest way to catch the faculty the students need to find, and none of us really mind. If we didn't want to be found, we'd hide." She smiled.

"Especially with the more popular classes," Alice added.

"Just make sure to be explicit in class that you won't accept homework at meal times," Emmett said, waving his fork around. "My first term I didn't, and it was a nightmare. Most of the students are here because they want to be, but that doesn't mean they won't stretch the rules where they can."

Jasper nodded. Forks Academy had a very different feel than the other schools he'd taught at, and he liked it. The faculty, as diverse as Dr. Harper had made them sound, actually _wanted_ to be there, rather than being disgruntled at not having received university positions like some he'd encountered previously.

Alice glanced at her watch and declared they had to leave to make it on time.

Jasper gathered his tray and stood with the others, repeating the process from the night before as they headed across campus to the library. He noticed that the group set an easy pace, allowing Edward to keep up without having to push himself too hard. They walked in pairs almost unconsciously, Jasper thought, Emmett and Rosalie holding hands, Alice and Bella talking quietly, Alice occasionally tucking a loose strand of Bella's hair behind her ear, and Jasper and Edward bringing up the rear of the group.

Esme was standing behind a table just inside the library, stacks of name cards and folders with the school logo embossed on the cover piled in front of her. "Good morning!" she greeted them, passing out their name cards and giving them each a folder. Each of their name tags had their given names typed in large font, with their last names in small font below, followed by their academic department.

The group chorused their greeting together, making Esme laugh. They took their name tags and affixed them to various parts of their body (Emmett in the middle of his chest, the girls strategically on their chests, Jasper and Edward on their thighs), and ventured further into the library. The tables had been arranged in a vaguely circular shape and labeled by academic area, Jasper assumed because the individual departments weren't all that big.

Jasper headed to the table marked "Social Sciences" and took an empty seat across from an older gentleman and a distinguished looking woman. He glanced around, spotting Emmett and Rosalie chatting with three other teachers at the "Sciences" table, and Edward and Alice greeting their table mates at the "Art and Music" table.

"You must be Jasper Whitlock," a low voice spoke up from behind him.

Jasper turned. "Yes, sir."

The man was in his mid to late fifties, if Jasper had to guess, and was dressed in jeans and a white button up with a tweed jacket. "I'm Sam Peters, de facto chair of the history department."

Jasper took the hand Dr. Peters extended. "Nice to meet you, Dr. Peters."

"Sam, please," he said, giving Jasper's hand a firm shake and sliding into the seat next to him.

"Jasper, then," he responded with a nod.

"So, Jasper," Sam started. "You getting settled in alright? If I remember, you're living on campus?"

"I am," Jasper said, relaxing minutely in his seat, stretching his long legs out in front of him. "Emmett Cullen's been showing me around a bit, and I've gotten to know some of the other faculty already."

"That's good to hear. Emmett's a good guy," Sam said. "It's good that he's showing you the ropes. I can't imagine it's easy acclimating to a new school."

Jasper shrugged and flashed a lazy smile. "I've gotten used to it, but it's nice having someone around to ask.

They fell into small talk while the rest of the faculty arrived. The redhead from the gym walked in with Carlisle and waved at Rosalie before they took seats near the front of the room with the Dean. After a few moments, conversation settled down and the Dean took his place behind the podium once Esme took her seat at the table.

"Good morning," Dr. Harper greeted them all. "Thank you all for making it here. Hopefully today won't be too overly painful as we work through everything to begin a new year." He shuffled through some papers. "First off, we have a couple of new faculty members among us this year. Jasper Whitlock joins us in the History department, taking over for Dr. Palmer. Also, Michael Newton will be a part-time addition to the science department, teaching lower division classes."

A round of applause went through the room and Jasper was thankful he hadn't been asked to introduce himself. Yet.

"Alright, if you'll open up the folders that Mrs. Cullen provided, we can take a look at the agenda for today and get started."

Jasper opened his folder and found a notepad, pen, and pencil all with the school logo, and pulled out the top sheet of paper, printed with the agenda on school letterhead. As Emmett had alluded the previous evening, it looked to be a full day of ice breakers, policy updates, team building exercises, and other administrative details.

The morning progressed fairly quickly. The first ice breaker required them state their name, nick name, degree and institution and what animal they would most want to be, and then try to recall the five people that had gone previously. They had a good laugh at some of the animals (Emmett declared teddy bear, Alice a bumblebee), and some of the mistakes. From there, Carlisle spoke about the clinic and service available and informed everyone that flu shots were mandatory and Tanya (the red head from the gym who happened to be the school nurse) would be contacting everyone about setting an appointment. Esme then spoke about some of the more boring, yet necessary details: mailboxes, copy machines, office hours, office supplies, etc.

Though it'd only been an hour and a half since the morning break, Jasper was thankful when they broke for lunch. Once again he was reminded of why he'd gone into teaching – he wasn't sure he could've survived a corporate world of meetings day in and day out.

Lunch was a catered affair, and they had it in the same room they'd been in for the morning. It wasn't anything overly fancy; a buffet line had been set up in the foyer where Esme had been stationed earlier in the day. Jasper joined the queue, finding basic picnic and potluck style food in the warming trays. A thigh of fried chicken and a few slices of tri-tip were added to the pasta, potato, and green salad on his plate, along with some fresh veggies and a dip that looked to be dill. He balanced his plate on a glass of punch while he managed his plastic-ware (grateful for a lack of sporks) and made his way back to his seat. He wasn't sure if they were supposed to remain with their divisions for further bonding/team building, so he decided to play it safe.

However, when Bella approached his table a few moments later, he learned that wasn't the case. "May I join you?" she asked softly.

"Of course," Jasper replied, holding the chair out for her as she slipped into her seat, like he had the previous evening. "To what do I owe the pleasure of your company?"

She blushed a pretty pink, her chocolate brown eyes sparkling as she bit her lip. "I'm kind of hiding from Alice," she admitted after a moment. "She's driving me crazy with talk about a major shopping trip in the next few weeks, so Edward told her that Kate had called, and she's run back to the dorms."

Jasper chuckled quietly, admiring the subtle manipulation Edward pulled off. "Your secret is safe with me, darlin'," he responded with a grin, and she ducked her head again, hiding behind a curtain of her hair. Not usually one for small talk, Jasper broke the easy silence between them with a question that had been lingering since breakfast.

"So," he started quietly. "What was that with the student this morning? Tim?"

Bella nodded and took a sip of punch. "Tim's a fifth year," she began. "Last fall he was signed up for one of my creative writing courses. As the semester drew on, he got further and further behind. Since it was an elective, he decided to drop the course half-way through."

Jasper nodded as she took another drink. "Shortly after Thanksgiving, he began to grow noticeably thinner and more and more tired, so much so that even his performance in his core classes was beginning to suffer. He was in my Lit class that semester, also," she reflected. "We all tried to intervene, but finally Carlisle had to drag him off to the local hospital for more extensive testing than he could do here. He was diagnosed with Leukemia shortly before finals. He took spring semester off to get treatment, which included a bone marrow transplant. It sounds like he's come to terms with everything, though, and is willing to write about it."

"Why did you question his seriousness about taking your class this time?" Jasper wasn't questioning her professionalism, and by the blush that graced her cheeks, she knew that.

"He – ah," she stammered. "He was quite the flirt last time around. Even when it was clear he wasn't feeling well, he was a constantly teasing me," she answered. "I want him in the class for the right reasons, not just because he has a crush on me."

Jasper grinned. He couldn't really blame the boy. She was very pretty, in the girl next door kind of way. Even Jasper could see that, though he wasn't physically attracted to her. "I can see how that could be awkward," he said with a grin.

Bella nodded around a bite of potato salad. "We'll see how it goes this term. Do you have any of the 5th years?"

"One section, I think," Jasper answered. He'd looked over his schedule the previous evening. "I don't have 3rds, but I have all the others."

"Not too bad, then," Bella answered. "The upper levels get electives, right?"

Jasper shook his head no. "There are history electives, but they're core classes for all levels in the fall term. I think I'll get an elective or two in the spring." If he made it that far.

"What level are you looking forward to the most?" Bella asked, poking around her plate with a fork.

"Probably the 6ths," he said after a beat. "They get the Civil War era, which is my favorite," he said. "How about you? What's your favorite class?"

Bella smiled softly. "British Women Novelists," she declared. "It's one of my spring electives."

"That sounds…boring," Jasper said with a wink, and Bella giggled.

"Yeah, it's not everyone's cup of tea," she admitted, pushing her plate away. It was hard not to notice that she'd barely eaten anything.

"Not hungry?" He asked gently. She hadn't eaten much breakfast either, from what he could remember.

She shrugged. "Not really." She didn't meet his gaze.

Jasper wondered what she was really hiding from, but decided not to push the issue in a room full of colleagues with a young woman he barely knew. He might, however, speak to Emmett or Edward and see if they could shed any light. "Well," he said. "I have to say this was much better than I'd expected."

Bella smiled softly at him, a bit of spark back in her eyes. "They do take pretty good care of us, here."

"I'm beginning to notice that," Jasper quipped and Bella laughed softly. They filled in the rest of the hour with getting to know each other conversation. Jasper learned that Bella was from Arizona originally, but had moved to live with her father after mom remarried when she was a teenager, and had decided to stay in the Pacific Northwest after finishing her doctorate at WSU in Pullman. Jasper told her the short version of his story, that he'd been in the Marines until discharged and went to school. They bonded a bit over being orphans, though after hearing Bella speak about the Cullens he realized how fortunate he was to have caught Esme's attention. Bella, like Jasper, was alone in the world, and Esme had given her another family. Jasper could only hope that he'd find himself with that kind of relationship with anyone, but if it happened to be the Cullens, he wouldn't complain.

When the rest of the faculty began to settle back in, Jasper gathered their trash and Bella returned to her table, thanking Jasper for his company at lunch. He carried their garbage out to the cans waiting near the buffet, which had been mostly cleared away and grabbed a bottle of water from the ice bucket before returning to his seat as the Dean once again took his place at the podium.

"In light of the recent violence on school campuses across the country," Dr. Harper started. "We have implemented several procedures to follow in the unlikely event of any such tragedy occurring on this campus." He shuffled through his papers.

"Our safety committee has worked with local law enforcement to plan for three major incidents. The first plan is for any incident involving the dormitories. If any such incident is reported from a dorm, the others will be put on a lock down and faculty and staff will be alerted by text, telephone, and email."

Jasper made a note to get a prepaid cell phone next time he was out, and he remembered seeing a phone mounted on the wall in the kitchenette.

"It will be the in-residence faculty's responsibility to maintain the lockdown until authorities clear the area. Each hall has been stocked with non-perishable necessities, in the event of any long term crisis. The Safety Committee will make periodic checks on these stores and will be contacting floor and hall faculty for meetings."

Though Jasper hated the necessity of it, he was glad that the school took the threat of potential violence seriously, and had planned for it.

"We will be having a drill at some point in the next few weeks," he continued. "I don't know which of the three scenarios it will be, and I haven't been informed of the date or time. _Please_," he emphasized. "Don't focus on it. We do not believe there is any reason to think anything will happen here in Forks, but it is best to be prepared."

The Dean then talked through the two other scenarios – an in class problem or an incident at meal time. In all cases, a lockdown was involved and he outlined the faculty and staff responsibilities in each case.

"Now, our liaison with the local authorities is James Hunter, a detective with Forks PD. If you have any reason to report something suspicion, you can call him directly; his information is in your packet."

Jasper wondered if that was Bella's James, but he dismissed it as a huge coincidence. The Dean spoke for a few more minutes on general campus safety procedures, before making a graceful segue into the afternoon break.

"Before I move on, I want to thank you all. If you're not faculty in-residence, you're free to leave, though we will be adjourning for cocktails in about an hour," Dr. Harper explained. "We'll take a fifteen minute break before we continue with the dormitory information. I believe there are cookies and coffee available, yes Mrs. Cullen?"

Esme nodded. "Cocktails will be served in the administration building starting at 5," she said for everyone to hear.

Jasper heard whispers from some of the faculty about spending some time in their offices as he rose for a stretch. Around him instructors were gathering their things and Esme went speeding past to oversee something or other. Out of the corner of his eye he caught Edward limping toward the exit and impulsively, Jasper decided to join him and bum another smoke.

He stopped at the tables where Esme was manning refreshments with a young tall brunette woman. Her name tag said Angela, and Jasper nodded his thanks as he snagged two cups of coffee, dropping two cubes of sugar and a splash of creamer into one, grabbing a stir stick.

Jasper found Edward the required 20 feet from the entrance of the building, propped up against the wall causally. "Can I offer you a trade?" Jasper asked, holding out the cup with the stirrer. "Cream and sugar, right?"

Edward flashed him a crooked grin and extended the crumpled pack and lighter that he withdrew from his pocket. "Sounds fair."

Jasper set his coffee at his feet and handed the sweetened coffee to Edward, admiring the way he easily managed everything in his right hand, his cane in his left as he leaned on it. His cigarette was held between the long fingers of his right hand, while his fingers gracefully wrapped around the Styrofoam cup.

Jasper shook a cigarette free and lit it, handing everything back. Edward tipped his cane back against the wall to free his hand and shoved everything back into his pocket. Jasper took a long drag and bent for his coffee. He had plenty of fond memories of similar moments with his troop in the corps, though more often than not the coffee was crap, or so diluted with cheap whiskey that it no longer constituted coffee.

"Thanks," he said to Edward, flicking ash from the end. "Needed this today."

Edward laughed softly. "It does get to you, doesn't it?" He took a draw on his own butt and sighed softly. "You didn't come out for the morning break."

Jasper nodded around his coffee cup. "I quit a few years back," he said with a shrug. "Every now and again, though, I give in." He sighed quietly. "Do we have to do this all again after winter break?"

Edward laughed again, a deep mellow chuckle. "No. When we come back they just send around memos for everyone."

"Thank Christ," Jasper muttered. It wasn't that he minded the meeting so much as he was restless and having so much information dumped on him at once made him tired. He was very glad they were nearly finished for the day.

Edward made a quiet sound around his own coffee and they smoked in silence for a few moments, enjoying the peace, at least Jasper assumed Edward was. He seemed pretty content in the moment.

"Thanks," Edward said after a few more minutes, dropping his butt to the ground and stepping it out carefully.

Jasper just looked at him curiously as he mirrored his actions.

"You can appreciate quiet moments," Edward expanded as he pushed off the wall. "You don't feel the need to fill every moment with chatter."

Jasper shrugged. "No problem. Though you could've just told me to fuck off, and I would have."

Edward flashed him that crooked grin again and nodded back toward the library. "I appreciate the company," he answered quietly. "Also…your discretion this morning."

"No problem," Jasper answered again. "I figured you weren't used to people hanging around during your workout and I really needed the run."

"Most people aren't so – " Edward paused, Jasper assumed to search for the right word. "In-tune with other people." They were walking back to the front of the building at an easy pace.

Jasper always had been. For as long as he could remember, he'd been easily affected by the moods of those around him, and as he grew older, he'd been able to influence people easily as well, especially through touch. His parents had called him charismatic; the base psychologist had labeled him highly empathetic. It had made him a good candidate for officer school; he'd just never had a chance to get beyond squad leader (the more optimistic side of him said he was exceptional to get that far at his age and experience).

"No big deal," Jasper said, offering Edward a tight grin.

Edward returned the grin and dropped the subject, for which Jasper was grateful. Most people kept away from him after they realized how in-tune with other people he was. Once they realized how much their own emotions could affect him, they tended to stay away. Somehow, blaming his loneliness on others made it easier to bear.

They parted inside the library – Edward for another coffee and Jasper for the men's room. He returned to his seat as the Dean re-took the podium and began speaking about dorm policies and regulations.

None of the information the Dean supplied was new to Jasper. Quiet hours began at 10 pm, ended at 7 am, and there was no official lights out time. As in-residence faculty, Jasper was responsible for having an open door policy that he split with Emmett; every other weeknight he was the man on call for any issues on his floor, which consisted of 50 young men in ages from 12 to 18. On the weekends, one person became responsible for the whole building and they were tethered to campus with a pager for emergencies. There were a total of six faculty on the three floors of Spader Hall, so Jasper would only have to be on call once every six weeks.

Jasper and Emmett were also responsible for coordinating with the faculty on the two floors above to conduct fire drills and periodic sweeps through the rooms for contraband. Students, of course, were not allowed alcohol or candles in their rooms, and the campus had a zero tolerance policy for drugs. Food was allowed, but dishes were not to be removed from the dining hall. Jasper learned that once classes started, there would be to-go boxes available at every meal for those who didn't want to eat in the dining hall.

What did surprise Jasper was that faculty was allowed to keep alcohol in their suites, so long as it was locked in the kitchen away from student view. He had figured Alice had just been bending the rules the night before, but he was happy to know she wouldn't have been in any trouble if they'd been caught drinking.

Smoking was not permitted in the buildings, and though they discouraged the students, there were smoking areas set up outside each building, the appropriate distance from the exits.

An hour after listening to the various rules and policies, the Dean finally dismissed them. Relieved, Jasper rose, slinging on his messenger bag and followed the faculty to the administration offices where the short cocktail hour would commence.

Exhausted, Jasper was considering blowing it all off and heading straight back to his room. He was mentally drained from all the information he'd retained throughout the day, and from exerting himself to keep from falling into everyone else's boredom and growing lethargy. He was physically twitchy from sitting still so long. He was very tempted to just head for the gym to run it all off again, but Alice shot him a look that almost had him believing she knew what he was planning so he shrugged and fell in beside the group.

He convinced himself he only had to have a drink, and he could pull a college style dine and dash in the dining hall and escape to his room. After spending all day surrounded by and interacting with people, he wasn't in the mood to spend much more time around them, even the group that had grown on him so much quicker than he'd thought possible.

Finding himself once again walking with Edward, he saw the other man smile softly, almost like he knew what Jasper was thinking.

"I'm not sure Alice is quite ready to let you go yet," Edward said softly. "But if you put in a token appearance, she'll understand."

"She's quite the social director, isn't she?" Jasper asked, amused. He was almost beginning to think of himself as Alice's shiny new toy that she wanted to play with all the time.

Edward snorted. "You have no idea." They walked in quiet for a few moments. "You look strung out," Edward observed softly.

"Just tired," Jasper explained after a moment, choosing his words carefully. He sighed and scrubbed his hands through his hair. He'd never really coped well with larger groups, and to that day he had no idea how he'd survived basic training, or barracks life surrounded by all those men, 24/7. Of course, he thought, it could be that he'd been more comfortable around people back then, which made it easier. When he was still capable of trusting people.

"Hn." Edward apparently didn't believe him, but once again let it go.

They arrived at the administration building and Jasper joined the crowd of people mingling around the room. It was an open bar, and Jasper poured himself two fingers of whiskey and faded into the corner of the room, content to observe. The noise level grew as he nursed his drink and others weren't as self-moderating. Faculty started disappearing after a half-hour, and once Jasper finished his drink, he followed.

He slipped out of the building, he hoped unnoticed, and made for the dining hall quickly. Jasper ordered a turkey sandwich from the deli line, grabbed a couple of cookies from the dessert line, and took an apple and orange from the fruit tray. The boxes weren't out yet, so Jasper wrapped his sandwich in a few layers of paper napkins and stuck everything into his messenger bag.

Jasper almost laughed at himself when he considered sneaking out of the dining hall to keep from being seen. With a roll of his eyes, he strolled out of the building, heading for his dorm.

"Jasper!"

He paused and turned, seeing the group he'd eaten with the previous evening just entering the dining hall. He waved at Alice and continued on, hating that he made a pout appear on her face, but desperately needing some time away from people.

Arriving back in his room he sighed, feeling the tension leave his back and shoulders. He dropped his bag onto his bed and toed out of his shoes. He thought about jumping into a hot shower, but decided to wait until after he ate and was ready to settle down and work for the evening. Jasper plugged his iPod back into the dock and switched on a folksy playlist that helped him mellow out some while he pulled his laptop out and fired it up, wanting to check his email and read a little news and goof off online while he ate.

Finished with his meal and feeling a lot more centered, Jasper reached into his bag for the folder of documents from the earlier meeting. He spread the curriculum documents over his lap and compared it to the schedule from the packet Esme had given him on Sunday. He shuffled everything around so they were in order of his classes (4th year, 5th, prep, 1st, 6th, 7th, 2nd), and began his planning for the first couple of days. He thought about jogging over to his office to retrieve his text books to truly prepare, but decided to save that errand in case he couldn't sleep.

With his plans largely in place, Jasper turned to creating his syllabi. He used the ones form St. Maria as a template, altering the relevant information.

He worked steadily, only glancing up briefly when he heard the shower turn on. Jasper glanced at the clock and saw that it was nearly 11 pm. He'd been working for four hours. He scrubbed at his face, then at his hair, rolling his head on his neck to loosen the muscles that had grown tight as he worked slightly hunched over on the bed. Deciding he was done, Jasper stacked up all his papers and closed the lid on the laptop and shifted everything to the round table that would serve as his desk space.

Jasper pulled a pair of sleep pants from the bureau and tossed them on the bed before he switched off the tall floor lamp and ducked into the vacated bathroom to wash up and brush his teeth before bed. He noticed the addition of a white board to Emmett's door and then on his own. He scribbled a note on Emmett's and disappeared back into his room, locking the door behind him before grabbing a book from the shelf and tossing it next to his pajamas. He changed in the soft light of his desk lamp, throwing his clothes in the general direction of the closet and slipped between the covers, reading until he felt himself doze off.

* * *

Fuck, but Edward hated faculty orientation day. All that sitting around rehashing the same procedures made his leg stiffen up and gave him a headache. Fortunately, there had been enough breaks for him to get up and move around that he wasn't completely immobile by the time they broke for dinner. It seemed that he wasn't the only one that was completely wasted by the end of the day. Jasper had looked like he was ready to keel over, and Edward hadn't believed for one second that he was just tired.

Which was why Edward had just let him sneak off from the cocktail hour instead of siccing Alice on him, like he'd done to Emmett and Bella so many times before. He realized he'd already become uncannily aware of where Jasper was in a room, and that he wasn't as put off by Jasper as he was when around strangers since the accident. It troubled him, but he pushed the thought aside as he continued to schmooze with other faculty until Alice decided it was time for them to head out for dinner.

"Have you seen Jasper?" Alice asked as they made their way to the door.

"Not since we walked over here," Edward lied smoothly, glancing quickly at Bella when she giggled next to him. Sometimes that girl was all too observant for her own good. He draped his right arm over her shoulder and leaned some of his weight onto her as they walked. She hugged him around his waist and supported him.

"How was your thing Friday night?" Edward asked Bella. James had taken her off to some gala fundraiser, and Alice had gushed about the dress she'd been wearing. "Have a good time?"

Bella shrugged and bit her lip. "I guess. You know I don't like all those formal parties, but James was really looking forward to it. I didn't really know anyone there and he was chatting everyone up." She gave Edward a small smile. "At least Alice let me wear flats."

If her shoes had been the highlight of her evening, it couldn't have been that much of a good time. "Well, less potential danger for you and those around you then," he teased. When Edward looked down, he saw there was a shadow in her eyes that hadn't been there before. He hugged her again and resettled into the easy pace.

"I know."Bella giggled. "How come you let Jasper run off? You'd never let Emmett or me get away with that?"

"You and Em can handle Alice. Jasper's new, and I don't want him to be scared off too quickly," he said.

Bella looked at him, mouth open, her large brown eyes wide and unblinking.

"What?" Edward asked, using his right hand to close her mouth with a gentle motion.

"In the two years I've known you," Bella started, "I've never seen you so interested in whether or not someone was sticking around or not."

Shit. Edward knew he was caught. First Alice, then Bella. He was sure he'd get an earful from his mother the next time they had a semi-private conversation. He fumbled for an excuse. "Mom's already adopted him, so I may as well get to know him," he said nonchalantly. "And she'd have my head if I let Alice's craziness drive him off."

Bella snorted. "Right." Then she grinned. "He is hot, though," she said with an arched eyebrow and a contemplative look. "He's got that tall lanky cowboy thing going on."

Edward rolled his eyes and laughed. "Yes, he's good looking. Now, I'll ask you the same thing I asked Alice. I've known the man for all of 24 hours. Give us some time, alright?"

Bella blushed lightly and nodded, a wide smile breaking out over her face, banishing the shadow across her features. Edward wondered what it would take to keep it away forever. "How long is Alice giving you?"

"Bella," he nearly whined and she laughed aloud, earning grinning looks from the rest of their little group. She kissed his cheek with a smile.

"Jasper!" Alice called out suddenly as they reached the front of the dining hall.

Edward looked up and over to see the blonde wave and resume his path back toward Spader, and laughed when Alice pouted at his departure. "Let him be, Alice," Edward said as they pushed into the dining hall and flashed their i.d. cards to the attendant on duty. "It was a long day and he looked dead on his feet."

His cousin sighed and retrieved a tray that they'd share. He was quite capable of managing on his own, but it made Alice feel useful and he had to admit, it was nice to let someone else worry about spilling a tray full of food in front of the student body.

"I just want him to like us," Alice said quietly. "Something tells me we just need him as part of our group."

Edward nudged her gently in a gesture of affection. "I don't think you have to worry about him not liking us. If that were the case, he'd never have come over for movies last night, or let Emmett drag him to the gym at dark thirty in the morning." He flashed a smile at her. "Just give him time. He's been alone for quite some time, and he may need to adjust."

"Time, time," Alice chanted, rolling her eyes, but smiling. "The one thing everyone wants and no one really has. Okay. I'll try to tone it down."

"Thanks, pixie."

Edward wasn't really hungry, so he slapped together a peanut butter and jelly sandwich and grabbed a glass of milk. He slipped them onto Alice's tray while she made a salad at the salad bar to go with her entrée of meatloaf and smashed taters. He followed her out into the dining hall toward their usual table where Emmett, Rose, and Bella were already waiting.

Emmett had piled on the food, as usual. Edward wondered how his metabolism hadn't caught up with him after he quit playing professional sports, because he still ate like a football player. But it worked for him, and as far as Edward knew, his brother was perfectly healthy. Rosalie didn't eat like the stereotypical model, but was fairly healthy given the options available. She'd been known to gorge like the rest of them when the mood struck. Bella was another girl who knew how to eat, but Edward frowned as he watched her push around a bit of white rice, not really eating, as he and Alice took their seats at the table.

"Not hungry?" Edward asked Bella, retrieving his own light dinner off the tray.

Bella shook her head. "I've been feeling kind of…" she wriggled her hand back and forth and made a face. "Probably just nervous about classes tomorrow." She reached for her ever present mug of tea, curling her hands around it.

Edward nodded, giving her forearm a squeeze. She hated public speaking, and the first couple days of classes were rough until she got to know her students and got more comfortable with them.

Dinner was comfortable and familiar, Edward remaining mostly quiet as he ate and listening to the conversation easily carried by Emmett, Rose, and Alice. Bella excused herself early, wanting to sleep off whatever had her feeling off, and the rest of them sat around sipping coffee and having dessert until they were run off by the staff. It happened nearly every Friday and Sunday dinner, and it had become something of a running joke for new staff members to have to chase them out.

"I'll see you guys tomorrow," Edward said as he parted from the group. With classes starting, the first week would be crazy, but they tried to meet for meals whenever possible. When he exited the dining hall into the cool night air, he shook a cigarette from the pack and lit it, sighing quietly after his first inhale. He made his way across to his building and let himself in, stubbing out his butt before he entered.

Paul, his suitemate, was apparently out, since his side of the room was dark when Edward went into the kitchenette for a bottle of water. Edward took two of the more mild pain killers and settled at the table in his room to start working on the rest of his plans for the semester. He taught only three formal classes; Intro to Music Theory, Music Appreciation (for the non musicians needing arts credit), and Music History. He also ran the Jazz Ensemble and gave private piano lessons. All in all, it wasn't a heavy load, though the ensemble took up a lot of time with prepping for concerts and festivals in the spring.

He had three new students to schedule for lessons; first years that were new to the school. There was also the usual contingent of returning students to slot into his day. They'd all be contacting him in the next couple of days to schedule their lessons around classes and other activities. His academic classes were ready to go, and the first week of Jazz rehearsals would be spent in auditions. They only rehearsed twice a week for two hours because many of the students also performed with the audition only wind ensemble and/or the open symphonic band.

Feeling well prepared for the first day of classes, Edward shuffled everything into his untidy piles, picked up his laptop and hobbled to his bed to watch a movie before bed.

* * *

[end note: I know the Edward parts have been a bit shorter. Mostly they're included here to give a bit of character background that Jasper doesn't have yet, and round out the action of the chapters. I promise things will even out eventually between Jasper and Edward

Audition only wind ensemble = all participants must participate in an audition process and be approved by the director, as opposed to an 'open' ensemble where all performers are welcomed]


	4. Chapter 3: First Week part 1

**A/N: I'll be posting slightly shorter chapters from here out. I find really long chapters hard to focus on, so I'll be splitting them up at POV shifts. Though, there will be some 'mini chapters' coming that will be shorter and contain only one POV. **

**Thanks to Wishingforlove81 as always for the beta support. Characters aren't mine. I'm just playing in someone else's sandbox for a bit.  
**

By the end of the first week, Jasper had fallen into an easy routine. He joined Edward and Emmett in the gym each morning, occupying himself in the pool or the cardio room for the first half-hour before joining them in the weight room. From there he'd jog back to the dorm and shower before Emmett returned after his own run so they wouldn't have to fight over the shower. A cup of coffee while he dressed and checked e-mail and gathered anything he'd brought over from the office the evening before, and then he'd join the ladies and Edward for breakfast before his first class at 8:30.

His first class, the fourth years (high school freshmen) was studying Global history from the mid-eighteenth century to the dawn of the First World War, focusing on the revolutions occurring throughout society. They'd spent the first week outlining the various Empires reigning at the time and tracing the histories of royal families to set up the stage for the upcoming weeks. He was planning to give them a quiz on the dynasties the first part of the following week. So far they seemed engaged with the material, and it made Jasper wonder if it was his teaching or their own motivation to do well.

In contrast, his fifth year students were a bit quieter and less into the studies of the past 150 years of world history, beginning around 1900. He hoped it may have been because the material was somewhat of a review, but he needed to figure out where they'd left off the previous term, especially knowing what he was covering with his own class of fourth year students. He could only hope when they got into more modern history of the second world war and the era that followed that they'd perk up a bit more.

After his second class ended at 10:45, Jasper had his prep period. He passed most of the hour in his office, taking advantage of the electric kettle that Bella kept there to make coffee as he got ready for his afternoon classes. At 11:45, he'd run to the dining hall to grab something for lunch to see him through the four classes the followed. By the end of the week he knew he needed to keep some snacks in the office for his office hour at the end of the day, or he was going to end up biting the heads off students who came to see him.

The first year students at 12:30 were studying ancient civilizations and Jasper was looking forward to getting the group of 12-13 year olds up to the Greeks because as cheesy as they were, some of the Sci-Fi Channel's miniseries about Greek epics were nice examples to use to reinforce lessons. They were also a great group of students, and he was thankful he had them after lunch because they were slightly mellowed while they digested, which knocked down a bit of the 'omg we're on our own!' attitudes they exuded in the halls and dorms.

He was covering his favorite time period with the sixth year students. Technically he was supposed to cover the restoration period of the 1870s, but since the timeline in the curriculum was a bit vague, Jasper decided he'd start with the lead up to the Civil War and continue through as much of US history as he could in that time frame. So far his students seemed to have caught on to his enthusiasm, though they weren't particularly thrilled with his assignment of a couple of novels.

The seventh year students were getting more of a civics lessons. As high school seniors, they were getting a course that was probably much closer to a university level politics course, but Jasper didn't mind teaching it. He was beginning the term with civil rights issues from around the world and from there they'd be discussing environmental and globalization issues, culminating in a major research project at the end of the term.

Jasper's day wasn't quite over with his last class of the second year students and their studies of world history beginning at 600 CE and moving into the 15th century, and beyond if he had time to cover it. The class got out at 5:15, which meant Jasper taught for nearly five hours straight, with only fifteen minute breaks between classes. He really had to stock up on snacks once the work started piling up and he wasn't able to actually breathe between classes.

On Tuesdays and Thursdays he had office hours following his last class, so he didn't make it to the dining hall until 6:30, and thankfully, they served until 7:30. By the end of the week he realized exactly why they had a full campus dinner on Sunday evenings; he barely had any contact with other faculty throughout the week. He did see Bella, but he counted that toward them sharing an office rather than actually socializing, and though he ate breakfast with most of the group, everyone was generally quiet and preparing for their day over the meal and not chit-chatting with each other.

By Friday, Jasper was ready to drop for the weekend, despite the stack of homework he needed to correct. But he'd received an email from Alice that afternoon, cc'd to everyone, that they were eating dinner together in the dining hall at 5:30 and reminding him about Saturday dinner at Esme and Carlisle's, offering to give him a ride. So instead of shoving everything into his bag and hiding in his room until sunrise, he left everything in the office, intending on going back after dinner, and headed for the dining hall.

He bumped into Edward and Alice while he was trying to decide what to have for dinner. Alice looked as perky as usual as she carried a tray for the both of them (making Jasper wonder if it was a concession Edward had made to make her feel useful and supportive because he didn't seem to be the type of person to just let someone do things for him). She was adding a plate of salad while Edward stood by with an amused grin on his face. Feeling completely out of it, Jasper poured himself a bowl of Lucky Charms and was going to be done with it, but decided to add a couple slices of pizza because he was more hungry than tired, or at least he was hungry enough to know that he'd be miserable in the morning if he didn't eat more than the bowl of cereal. Instead of pouring milk on the cereal, he grabbed a glass so he could add it when he was ready.

"That's really not a well balanced meal," Edward mused.

"I'm really too tired to care," Jasper answered with a small grin. As nice as it was to see Edward again, he was well and truly out of steam. He hadn't expected the week to take such a toll on him, but the teaching load was more than he was used to, and he'd had the summer off.

"Long week?" Edward slid a couple slices of pizza onto a plate and glanced at Jasper, who nodded, before slipping it onto his tray; Alice was still occupied at the salad bar.

Jasper nodded. "My prep's too early, so I teach five straight in the afternoons. The classes are great, the schedule is just taking some getting used to."

"Give it another week. If I adjusted, not having taught before, I'm certain you can," Edward declared as they moved past the registers used at lunch and breakfast. Edward led the way to their 'usual' table where Bella, Rosalie and Emmett were already seated.

Jasper sat between Edward and Emmett, leaving the empty space between Edward and Bella for Alice. As he said his greetings to everyone, Jasper noticed Bella picking at a salad, appearing to move around more food than she was eating. But before he could pursue the thought, Edward retrieved his pizza from Jasper's tray and Alice took her seat, shifting plates around.

"So, Jasper," Alice chirped from Edward's other side. "How was your first week?"

"Long," he answered simply, and the others laughed.

"The first week always is," Emmett advised. "But you'll get settled into the routine."

"That's what I told him," Edward said with a smirk.

"My first week was a disaster," Emmett said. "Someone pulled the fire alarms the first night, and of course it was raining and I had gone to bed in only my jockey shorts. I hadn't completely unpacked yet, and I couldn't find my robe and didn't think to grab a friggin pair of pants."

Snickers floated around the table. "Oh, it only got worse from there," Emmett continued. "I was late for faculty orientation, embarrassing myself and my parents. I couldn't find my classroom the first day and was late for my first class, which happened to be the 6th years, who can make your life miserable. I got food poisoning from something, and of course, that hit in the middle of my last class for the day. By the end of the week I found out I was allergic to chalk when my hands swelled up and I nearly went into anaphylactic shock. It was miserable."

Everyone was laughing by the end of the story, and Jasper felt relieved by the light hearted atmosphere that settled around them, though he couldn't help but feel bad for what Emmett had gone through.

"Oh, I can top that," Alice said, bouncing in her seat. "When Edward first came here-"

"Alice," Edward warned, but a smile was playing around his lips, causing his eyes to sparkle, Jasper could see, and the laugh lines around his eyes crease in his good humor.

"So, when Edward first started, it was also mine and Bella's first semesters, and Edward was still fairly reliant on the walker since he was still going through PT," Alice explained. "There was this one assistant for the music department who quite literally, would follow Edward everywhere."

"Jessica Stanley," Edward muttered, shaking his head. "That girl didn't know the word no."

"Anyway," Alice said with a giggle after taking sip from her diet soda. "Jessica got it in her head that she and Edward were just meant to be and set about trying to seduce him by any means possible." She paused to giggle again. "This one time, Edward was in a lesson, and since the piano hadn't been moved into his office yet, he was using a practice room. They're tiny, right, so Edward had left his walker parked outside and sat next to his student in the chair that was in the room." Alice interrupted herself to giggle for a moment. "I was coming up to get him for lunch, and I saw Jessica hanging around outside the practice room door, and no walker in sight. Edward was mortified when he came out, hanging onto his student for balance and support, to find Jessica waiting in a very skimpy top, offering her 'support,'" Alice said, fighting not to laugh. "Apparently she'd hidden the thing in an attempt to get closer to Edward. It took us several minutes to convince her it was really in her best interests to retrieve the thing, meanwhile, that poor student looked traumatized."

Bella was giggling softly, biting her lip, and everyone else was laughing quietly, even Edward.

"After that debacle," Edward picked up the story. "It was hard to get her to leave me alone. Thankfully I was out of the walker soon after that incident, which made it easier to run away from her when she got the idea I was worth coming after. A few weeks later, she started acting strange-"

"Stranger," Alice put in.

"Strang-_er_," Edward continued. "She was shooting me weird looks and finding reasons to stop by my office and touch me. It was creepy. I repeatedly asked her to leave me alone unless she had department business, which she would then manufacture to get to me. I nearly reported her to the department chair for harassment, but I realized she wasn't really doing anything wrong."

Alice slapped her hand over her mouth as she started giggling, Jasper assumed because she knew what was coming next. Bella snickered, too.

"I came home one night with Alice and Bella; we were going to go into town to watch a movie and I needed to grab something from my room. Jessica and Lauren, her best friend and assistant to the math department were on my bed in what I can only assume they thought were sexy poses, in horribly fitting lingerie in the most god awful colors. They had bribed my suitemate to let them through and thought they'd seduce me when I got in."

"Bella and I are just laughing our asses off," Alice says through her laughter. "Poor Edward didn't know what to do with himself. The look on his face," she wheezed. "I'd only ever seen Bella turn that shade of red before."

"I wanted to bleach my brain," Bella said, wiping tears of laughter from her eyes. "Lauren had the worst fake tan I'd ever seen, and I grew up in Phoenix. Not to mention the stitches Jessica still had in from her gallbladder removal earlier in the week."

"I finally managed to run them out, but needless to say, we never made it to the movies that night," Edward said dryly.

"Oh, god," Emmett wheezed, chuckling. "I'd nearly forgotten about that!"

They all laughed harder, the sound of a cell phone cutting through the noise.

Bella answered her phone, still laughing. "Hello?" When her expression shifted, the rest of the table's laughter died down and tension snapped back into place. "I'm at dinner," she said, rising, and offering them a brief, tight smile before she walked away and around the corner for some privacy.

Alice growled something under her breath that Jasper couldn't hear, and he took it upon himself to bring the happy back.

"So, when I first started at St. Maria…" he started and soon the laughter returned.

Bella never returned to the table, and they continued talking over desert and coffee, trading funny teaching stories, or stories from graduate school until the staff chased them out. Edward, who had been teaching for a shorter time than the rest of them, also chipped in some stories from life on the road with the orchestra. It was a pleasant evening and Jasper was glad he'd not just returned to his room after his classes were over.

Jasper cleared Bella's tray when they finally abandoned their table and joined the others outside.

"We're going out!" Alice declared. "Jasper, want to join us?"

"Thanks, but no," Jasper declined politely. "I think I'm going to head to the office and get my stuff and head back to crash for the night."

"But you don't even know where we're going yet," she said with a pout.

Jasper flashed Edward a look when he heard the low chuckle behind him. Edward was grinning around a cigarette as they walked. "Alice, I'm really tired," Jasper said. "Maybe next week, darlin', okay?"

Alice appeared to think about that offer for a moment before perking back up. "Okay!" She jumped up and kissed his cheek lightly. "Oh! Meet me after lunch tomorrow and we'll go shopping and then I'll take you out to Uncle Carlisle's and Aunt Esme's for dinner."

He figured he could do that to appease her for not partying with her. "Sure, Alice."

"Sucker," Edward mumbled behind him.

"Shut it," Jasper muttered back, fighting a smile. He'd forgotten what it was like to have friends, and these were some of the closest he'd had in a long time, even if he hardly knew them. "I'll see y'all tomorrow," Jasper said as he reached the junction that split off to the Humanities buildings on campus.

The group chorused their goodbye and Jasper set off toward his office at a brisk pace. Soon enough he was in his office to retrieve his papers and computer and then was back out on the path to his dorm. The hall was noisy, the students reveling in the end of the week and putting off studies for the evening. As he walked through the hall he was met with various shouts from students he had in classes and those who had met him at Tuesday's hall orientation meeting he'd run with Emmett and the four other in-residence faculty who lived upstairs.

There were two messages attached to his door when he got back to his room. One was from Esme, reminding him about his invitation to dinner on Saturday. The other was from Tanya, the nurse, about scheduling his flu shot. He pulled them loose and seeing no new messages on his white board outside his room, let himself in and shut the door behind him. He took a long slow breath, held it and slowly let it out through his nose, relaxing into his sanctuary.

He toed his shoes off at the end of the bed and dropped his bag on the table as he moved around to switch on the small reading lamp over his bed. After he changed his clothes into something more casual, he propped his door open, showing anyone on the floor that he was home and available of they needed anything, though he wasn't the one on call for the night.

The noise that filtered into his room kept him company as he read for an hour uninterrupted until his eyes started to droop without his permission. Sensing everything was alright in the hall, he once more closed and locked his door, washed up, and crawled into bed without setting his alarm, since he didn't have to be anywhere until after lunch on Saturday.

He was woken up once in the night by noise in the kitchenette, but Jasper recognized Emmett and Rosalie's voices and he hoped he'd remembered to lock the door as he turned over and went back to sleep.

Jasper woke just past seven in the morning, having slept for longer than he could remember in a long time. He truly had been exhausted. Rather than get up right away, he reached for his book and switched the light on over his bed, settling in to read for a bit longer before starting his day. The homework he had to grade could wait until Sunday, as could the little laundry he had to get done.

The need for caffeine and the bathroom eventually drove Jasper to leave the comfortable nest of his bed. He prepared himself a cup of coffee and a granola bar served as breakfast. He knew the dining hall was open until 2 serving brunch, but he wasn't quite ready to venture out for the day. He found a note asking him to pick up a quart of whole milk and a five dollar bill taped to his white board from Emmett. Jasper peeked into the fridge and saw there was plenty of room for a few essentials of his own around Emmett's meager supplies. He started drawing up a mental list as he carried his coffee back to his room, leaving the door ajar as he did when he wasn't dressing or sleeping, to finish his book.

By noon, he'd finished his book, checked his email, and made his shopping lists (including a laundry basket this time), then showered, dressed, grabbed everything he'd need for the day and took off for the dining hall. On his way out, he stopped at the small mailroom in the building to check for any mail. He wasn't really expecting anything, but he did have a few journals that he took, and his very few bills would have been forwarded from his last address in Colorado. Finding his slot empty, he continued on to the dining hall.

It was less crowded than he'd expected to find on a Saturday afternoon, but he couldn't say he minded. Jasper loaded up a tray and found a seat against a window, lost in thought while he ate.

"Mind if I join you?"

Jasper blinked, turning his gaze from the nothing he'd been staring at outside to Edward's amused gaze. "Not at all," he answered as Edward slid into the chair across from him. "How was the evening out?"

Edward rolled his eyes as he stirred two packets of sugar into his coffee. "One of these days Alice is going to figure out that it's useless to take a cripple to a dance club."

Something about the offhand way that Edward referred to himself as a cripple bothered Jasper. "You're not a cripple," he said before he could stop himself.

Edward shook his head. "Semantics," he dismissed, like he'd been through the argument before, and Jasper realized he probably had. "But at least she found a place with decent music this time. You missed out on meeting Kate, and watching Rose and Emmett – well, no, you didn't miss much there," Edward finished with his crooked grin.

"No, I heard them when they got home," Jasper said, following Edward's lead in the conversation. "Thankfully, that shared space between the rooms is a fantastic sound barrier."

Edward chuckled knowingly. "You have no idea. Having lived with him for sixteen years, I don't envy you being his suitemate."

Jasper shrugged, smiling. "He's easy enough to live with, I guess. None of his 'rules' seemed to be anything out of the ordinary." Though he had to admit he was surprised to learn that easy going Emmett had a few housekeeping rules to live by, mostly in regards to cleaning up after themselves in the shower. Emmett's exact words had been 'make sure the spunk goes down the drain.'

Edward smirked. "It's been a week. He's still on his best behavior."

"I have a feeling that his bringing Rosalie over last night may have brought an end to that."

"Probably," Edward agreed. "What'd you do last night?"

"Read a bit," Jasper answered. "Went to bed early. Fortunately my dorm seems to be well behaved. I'd expected a 2 am fire drill." He was speaking from experience.

"Yeah, well, we all weren't so lucky," Edward grumbled, spearing a chunk of melon from the bowl of fruit on his tray. "I never thought it was a good idea to keep that many 16-18 year old boys in the same place at one time."

Jasper laughed softly at Edward's ire. "Come on, you never pranked anyone when you were a teenager? Or while in college?"

Edward smirked. "I plead the fifth, Dr. Whitlock," he said.

"I'll take that as a yes," Jasper said with a grin.

Edward's smirk softened to a smile behind his coffee cup. "I was much more subtle than setting off the fire alarms at inconvenient times."

"Hm," Jasper mused. He'd had a few crafty comrades in the corps who always found extremely subtle ways of fucking with the rest of the squad. It had prepared him well for living amongst teenage boys on April Fool's Day. "Somehow I had a feeling you'd be a subtle prank genius, but then, you'd probably have to be, growing up with Emmett," he teased and was rewarded with Edward's laughter.

"Emmett's pranks tend to be big and loud, just so you know," Edward advised. "And he'll exact retribution on anyone who dares get him."

"I'll take that under advisement," Jasper drawled. He reached for his coffee, and found it empty. "I'll be right back," he said and rose, going to refill his cup.

He returned a moment later and took his seat across from Edward again. "Any plans for today?"

Edward shook his head around a mouthful of food, waiting to speak until he'd swallowed. "Just dinner with my parents and everyone else. I'll probably go lock myself in my office for awhile and play. I've been thinking about auditioning again, and I could use the practice."

Jasper settled back in his seat. "Do you still play?" He knew a little about what had happened through Emmett.

He shrugged. "Here and there, but nowhere near the level I used to," Edward said nonchalantly, though Jasper could tell he wasn't as easy going with his skill level as he made it sound. "After the accident, I focused on getting the range of motion back in my hands, which is why I still have to use the cane most days." He looked at Jasper and smiled wryly. "For a long time I was reconciled to living in a wheelchair if it meant I'd be able to play. Fortunately, it didn't turn out that way, even though I eventually did have to give up my professional career."

Jasper nodded. "You miss it." It was plain in everything about Edward that he missed his former career.

"Fuck yes," Edward said softly. "It was all I knew from the time I turned eighteen. I was a music performance major in college, though I did have enough practical sense to double with music education, and performing was eighty percent of what I did for four years. I was signed on with the Seattle Symphony before I graduated. I only played with them for two years, but I loved it." He sounded a bit wistful, and Jasper got the sense he didn't talk about his past life very often, the previous evening's stories excluded, because they hadn't been directly about him.

"It was hard after the accident," Edward continued. "I thought I'd lost everything, my livelihood, my lifestyle. I had months of rehab before I could even think about playing again, but my fine motor control isn't what it needs to be." He shifted and smiled sadly. "Sometimes I'm able to remember that I'm lucky to be here and walking and that bitching about having lost a job is a petty thing, and other days I get so pissed off about what I can't do anymore that it's all I can do to go to classes."

Jasper recalled what Emmett had said earlier in the week, that there had been a time they feared losing Edward, and not from his injuries. "I can relate, sort of," Jasper said. "When I was discharged from the corps, I thought I'd lost everything. My father and younger sister died when I was seventeen, and my mom six months before my discharge. I had no family, no prospects, and it took me a very long time to realize that I fortunate to have not gone to war, despite that I thought being a soldier was all I wanted to do." It wasn't an equal comparison and Jasper knew it.

But Edward didn't call him out on it, just looked thoughtful and nodded. "I'm not sure my family quite understands how much I was grateful for them during that time."

"They do," Jasper said firmly. "Your mother is far too compassionate to not realize that. And I think they understand that you tolerate a bit of fuss to make up for your behavior." Though he didn't ask it as a question, one of his eyebrows rose.

Edward chuckled. "Yeah. I was an ass for a long time. So I let Alice feel useful by carrying my trays and letting her take me shopping, and Emmett enjoys being my personal trainer and it lets us spend more time together."

Jasper had thought that was the case and smiled softly. "And Bella and Rosalie?"

"Bella refuses to give in to my shit, and so does Rose," Edward answered with a chuckle. "Emmett met Rose when they both started teaching here three years ago, so she knew me before the accident, though not very well." He grinned. "Bella and I started teaching here in the same semester, and she refuses to do anything for me unless I ask for it. She doesn't seem like it, but she's incredibly stubborn and selfless. Apparently she has handicapped friends from high school and she doesn't treat me any differently. Which actually was to my disadvantage," he finished with a bright smile.

Jasper knew there was a story there, and he shifted in his seat, stretching his long legs under the table, angling away from Edward's body. He gave Edward a look that clearly said 'do tell,' and he did.

"I tried to play the sympathy card to hook up with her," Edward explained. "But she saw through me, or had spoken to Emmett and knew about my past relationships – or lack thereof. She refused to sleep with me and turned into one of my best friends."

"She seems to have that ability – to be friends with just about anyone," Jasper commented.

Edward nodded around his coffee. "She does."

Jasper gnawed on his cheek for a moment before continuing. "I don't know her as well as you do," he started. "But we share an office, and I was just wondering if you noticed anything…odd about her lately?"

Edward appeared to think as he munched on a slice of strawberry. "Maybe," he said slowly, and Jasper could see the wheels turning. "She's seemed quieter at meals this week."

Jasper had mostly missed meals with the rest of them, and as he'd said, he didn't really know Bella well, but he'd noticed dark circles under her eyes that had only gotten worse as the week had progressed. "Something just felt off to me this week," Jasper said quietly.

"I'll keep an eye on her," Edward promised. "It could be first week exhaustion. But thanks."

Jasper nodded, but he was thankful that Edward hadn't completely dismissed his concern. "No problem. Just…she grows on you pretty fast, y'know?" he grinned. "It's been a long time since I've had friends."

"Well, you're not going to be rid of us so easily, Jasper Whitlock!" a voice chirped from his elbow and he saw Alice standing there. "Ready to go shopping?"

"Yes, ma'am," he answered crisply, snapping to attention best he could in his chair and winking at her, making her giggle. "Thanks, Edward. I'll see you tonight."

"Anytime, Jasper." Edward flashed him that crooked grin, but there was something else smoldering in those green eyes.

Jasper nodded, gathered his tray and dishes and rose, following Alice out. "So, where we goin'?"

"Target, Borders, art supply store, Groceries," Alice ticked off on her fingers.

"Groceries? Aren't we going to Esme and Carlisle's?" Jasper asked.

Alice shrugged. "We can put anything perishable in the fridge. I do it all the time and Aunt Esme doesn't mind."

Jasper nodded. "Lead on then, fearless pixie."

She laughed and they walked to her car parked in the main lot. "So," she said as they approached a silver Volvo. "What are your intentions toward my cousin?" she asked casually, pressing a button on the fob that made the car chip and unlock.

"What?" He blinked, taken off guard by her question as he reached for the door handle on the passenger side.

"Oh, come on, Jasper," she teased, looking at him over the roof of the car. "Alice sees and knows all." She laughed and slipped in behind the wheel.

He climbed into the car, confused, and took a deep breath. "This isn't your car," he said with a frown, smelling the taint of tobacco and mint.

"Nope, 'tis Edward's. I had to leave mine at the club last night since I'd had a ibit/i too much to drink. He'll take me back by there on our way back from Aunt and Uncle's tonight." She started the car and looked over at him. "You haven't answered my question," she said in a sing-song voice.

Jasper sighed and ran a hand through his hair. "Alice…"

"Jasper." She answered, a smirk playing on her lips.

He huffed another sigh, reading determination in her body language. She wasn't going to give up until she had her answers. "I don't know, Alice."

"You're attracted to him though, right?" Alice asked, focused on the road.

"Yeah," he admitted. "But he's straight."

Alice snorted and giggled. "No, he's not."

Jasper frowned. "He and Bella…?"

Alice shook her head. "He's – liberal in his affections," she said diplomatically. "Edward doesn't let gender get in the way."

The metaphorical light bulb went off over Jasper's head. "Ah." He felt a smile curve his lips that he couldn't suppress.

"So?" Alice bounced a little in her seat.

"I don't know, Alice," He repeated. "Edward seems like a great guy, and I'm getting to know him, but I wouldn't say I have any 'intentions'," Jasper said. "It's been a long time since I've done the relationship thing, and I'm still getting used to having friends. I've got a lot of things I still have to figure out for myself."

Alice appeared thoughtful for a moment. "Alright," she said as they pulled into the parking lot at the Target. She found a spot and parked, shutting off the car and turning in her seat to look at Jasper. "If you knew how much different he already was," she started. She smiled at Jasper. "Edward's never been that open with people, even before the accident," she said. "He's always been reserved, and after, he's so damn scared of being rejected because of his injuries, that he's held himself back from making new friends. But he took right to you that first night, and I've never seen him so willing to be alone with someone new so quickly."

She smiled again and reached for one of Jasper's hands, and he let her take it. "He's more himself when you're around, Jasper, and you have no idea how thankful I am that you came here. God, he was talking and joking with us last night." She sounded like that was a major feat. She gave his hand a squeeze. "If friendship is all you're after, it'll be enough, but I can tell that the two of you will be so much more." She shifted again and kissed his cheek. "Don't argue with me," she scolded before he had a chance. "I just know these things."

With that, Alice unbuckled her seatbelt and slid from the car gracefully.

Stunned with how everything had gone so far that morning, Jasper sat for a moment before Alice pounded on the hood to get his attention. Giving himself a shake, Jasper followed her into Target to begin their expedition.

Jasper couldn't remember the last time he'd had so much fun in a Target. Alice may have been a shopaholic, but at least she was fun about it. They must have walked every aisle, but Jasper could confidently say he didn't forget to buy anything under her guidance. She even helped him set up a prepaid cell phone and entered everyone's phone numbers.

"Who were you and Edward talking about when I came to get you?" Alice asked as they carried the bags (and the laundry hamper Jasper had remembered to purchase) out to the car.

"Bella," Jasper answered. "Something hasn't felt right this week, even though I've only really seen her when we're in the office at the same time. I wondered if he'd noticed anything."

Alice nodded and her gaze went distant for a minute before she came back. "She's lost a bit of spark," she noted. "And she didn't meet me for brunch this morning, though that means she probably just spent the night with James."

"Is he the campus police liaison?" Jasper asked.

"Mm-hm," Alice confirmed as she slammed the trunk closed. "I don't like him very much. I think he's creepy, and a bit controlling. He doesn't seem to like Bella spending much time with us."

"How long have they been together?" Jasper asked with a frown.

Alice thought for a moment. "About a year?"

"Has he always been like that?" Jasper slid into his seat.

"No," Alice answered firmly. "He's never been real friendly toward us, but it's only been since…spring break last year, I think, that he's tried to keep Bella away from us."

"Hm." Jasper thought. The scenario was all too familiar and even though there weren't any solid signs of abuse, the controlling nature and Bella's withdrawal from her network of friends and family was troubling.

"You don't think…" Alice started, chewed her cheek.

"I don't think he's hitting her," Jasper said firmly. "That's too hard to hide with as close as you are, but I think there's something going on. Call it a hunch based on past experience," he said. "Just – keep an eye on her?" He asked.

"Of course. She really has grown on you, hasn't she?" Alice asked.

"She reminds me of my baby sister," he said softly. "But you've all grown on me," he teased with a grin, hoping Alice wouldn't pursue the obvious questions from his last couple of statements.

"Well, we are all quite loveable," she said in a huffy voice before bursting out in laughter.

Their next stop was Border's because Alice had special ordered a couple of art books. They spent some time browsing before Alice went to pick up her order. Jasper selected a couple of magazines and a new historical fiction he'd heard about that looked interesting. They grabbed coffee at the café in the store and set off toward the art supply store Alice favored.

Lacking any artistic ability of his own, Jasper merely followed her around and held the basket as she tossed things in and they chatted. Somehow, during their wandering around the art store, Alice extracted a promise from Jasper that he would do some modeling. He made her promise he could keep his clothes on, though he had to work for it.

By the time they finished at the art supply store, they had just enough time to hit the grocery store before they were expected at the Cullens. Alice called Esme to ask if she needed anything last minute when they arrived at the Whole Foods. They each grabbed a small basket and proceeded with their shopping. Their purchases were fairly similar; Jasper elected to grab a half-gallon of milk that he could share with Emmett, as well as a small jar of peanut butter, crackers, and some snack bars he could keep in his office. He also grabbed a couple bars of chocolate, thinking they might come in handy sharing an office with a female, but also hoping that he could get Bella to open up to him a bit more.

Alice purchased some yogurt and something called No Pudge brownie mix, which she raved about for three full minutes when Jasper asked about it. Apparently, there was something practically magical about being able to make a single serve hot fresh brownie in the microwave that Jasper, as a male, was fundamentally unable to understand.

They paid for their purchases and loaded everything up in the trunk, taking the time to sort out any cold items into a couple bags they could take in to the house.

"Thanks for today, Alice," Jasper said. "It's nice getting to see some of town with someone else, and I've had a good time talking with you." He'd been getting to know Emmett and Edward fairly well through their morning workouts, and Bella a bit in the office, but he hardly saw Alice and Rosalie.

"Me too, Jasper," she chirped and flashed him a smile.

They drove out to the Cullen home in one of the more affluent parts of town. The house wasn't over extravagant, but it was more than Jasper had expected. Alice parked in the street and he retrieved the bags with their cold food and let her lead the way up the flower lined walk. There was a large Jeep parked in the driveway behind a Mercedes with darkly tinted windows, and a classic VW bug parked next to the Jeep.

"Emmett and Rose are here," Alice explained, waving at the Jeep. "I don't see Bella's car, though…"

"Who does the beetle belong to?" Jasper asked, curious. He'd have pegged it for Bella's.

Alice giggled. "Esme."

"Nice," Jasper commented.

Just then the front door was thrown open and Esme herself stood there, beaming. "Jasper! You came!"

"Yes, ma'am," he drawled, grinning. "Not sure I had much choice, between Alice and Emmett," he teased.

Alice poked her tongue out at him and danced up to give her aunt a hug before entering the house.

Esme hugged Jasper and tried to take the grocery bags from him. "Let me take those and stash them away."

"Just lead the way, and I can do it, Esme. I don't want to trouble you."

"Psh." Esme scoffed, but led him inside.

Emmett, Rosalie, and Edward were seated in the front room as Jasper passed through, and he greeted them, following Esme into the kitchen where there were two holes in the fridge just the right size for his and Alice's purchases.

"She usually drags one of the boys with her," Esme said conspiratorially in his ear. "She hates going on her own."

Jasper nodded and smiled. "I didn't mind."

Esme hugged him again, offered him a drink, and shooed him out of her kitchen.

**end note: The terms BC and AD have been generally replaced with BCE for Before Common Era and CE for Common Era to maintain a more secular form of notation for dates. **


	5. Chapter 4: First Week part 2

**Thanks to all for the fantastic reviews, and special thanks to algonquinrt for tweeting about this fic last week and sending readers my way.**

**Please note the change of rating: Due to upcoming content, this fic has been upgraded to an M rating.  
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Edward finished his breakfast after Jasper left with Alice, reflecting on their conversation. It was odd that he hadn't been as uncomfortable talking about his previous career with Jasper has he had been with other people before. Normally, Edward wasn't all that forthcoming about his professional music career that had been incredibly short lived, but Jasper was just easy to talk do. Something about him put Edward at ease, and it was a bit troubling to the man who'd kept to himself since his accident.

When he was done eating, he stacked his empty dishes onto his tray for the best balance to carry everything one handed and limped toward the exit. It wasn't too bad of a pain day, so he was moving a bit easier than usual as he made his way across to the arts building and his office.

Edward settled himself at the piano in the corner of his office. He ran his hands lightly over the dust shield over the keys before lifting it. He settled himself with a long slow breath and began to play Debussy's _Claire de Lune_, a piece he'd learned when he was fifteen and had used as part of his audition to the program at UW.

The melody poured from his memory without hesitation, though he could hear the clumsiness in the playing. He forced himself to breathe through the frustration and keep playing. In the last three years, Edward had become accustomed to frustration in learning to use his hands again, to play again, to walk again. The real task had been learning how to channel it into something productive so that the frustration didn't win. While he still hadn't mastered it, Edward was far more in control than he used to be. He rarely threw things anymore.

He held his breath for a moment after he finished, mimicking the way wind players kept their horns up at the end of a piece to extend the moment of the resolution. Finally he let it out slowly, his fingers slipping from the keys into his lap as his head dropped forward, chin touching his chest and his fringe falling into his eyes. He gave himself a few minutes to breathe, reflecting on his performance. It wasn't as bad as he'd feared, but not as good as he'd once played it. Middling, he decided. With another deep breath Edward rose and limped slowly, caneless, across to the file cabinet by his desk and withdrew a folder of sheet music.

Back on the piano bench, Edward sorted through the folder and pulled out a few selections. He tucked the rest back into the folder and set it aside, reaching for the pencil on the music stand. He spent several minutes reading the music much like a book, using the pencil to make notations as he read before he even got close to playing them on the keyboard. After reading through and notating the three pieces he'd culled, he went back through them and chose one to play.

Having read through the piece, Edward had a good idea of how it should sound. He settled down to play. It was rough, being a sight read, but Edward was proud of the way he managed to get through it, and even liked a few of the passages. Of course there were mistakes, but that was part of the process. He ran through it again, taking the trickier sections slower and working out fingering patterns until his cell phone beeped from his jacket pocket.

"Hello?" He answered after fishing it out.

"Hey, bro. You ready to head to mom and dad's?" Emmett asked.

Edward glanced at the clock on the wall, not realizing it had gotten so late. "Shit. Yeah, I guess." He was dressed in jeans and a button up shirt, but it was fine for a family dinner. "I'm in my office. Want me to meet you at the Jeep?" Alice had taken his Volvo to take Jasper shopping since her car had been left at the bar the night before. Tequila was not a good drink for Alice, but that had hardly stopped her.

"Yeah, we'll meet you at the car. I'm gonna go fetch Rose. You wanna get Bella?" Emmett replied.

"Yup, I'll call her," Edward said. "See you in a few." Edward disconnected and dialed Bella. It took six rings before she picked up.

"'Lo?" Her voice sounded rough and thick, making Edward wonder if she'd been crying.

"Hey, Bella, you alright?" He asked gently.

"Oh, Edward, hey," Bella said. "No, not really."

"What's wrong?" Edward frowned.

"I'm just not feeling well. Will you give Esme and Carlisle my love, but tell them I don't think I'm going to make it tonight?"

Edward felt his frown deepen. That wasn't right. Bella'd had the flu last year and still made it to dinner. She'd slept on the couch and let Esme and Carlisle fuss over her, but she'd still gone. Something was seriously wrong. "Alright, love, if you're sure. Can I bring you back anything? Esme would be happy to fix a plate for you."

"You're sweet, Edward, but I'm okay. I'll see you tomorrow, alright?" She sniffled quietly.

"Okay. Call me if you change your mind."

"I will. Night, Edward." Bella disconnected the call and Edward stared at his phone for a long moment before he shook himself loose and got a move on to meet Emmett and Rosalie. He tugged on his jacket and locked up behind him after he switched off the lights, leaving the music spread over the piano and bench.

Emmett and Rosalie were waiting by Emmett's huge Jeep in the faculty lot behind Spader. "Where's Bells?" Emmett asked.

"Not coming," Edward answered, allowing Emmett to help boost him into the vehicle, one reason he didn't ride with his brother all that often. "She said she wasn't feeling well and wanted to stay in tonight."

"That's not like her," Rosalie mused as she climbed into the passenger seat.

"I know." Edward frowned and shrugged. "Something's wrong, but she's not talking."

"We'll figure it out, bro," Emmett promised as he leapt easily into the driver's seat and the Jeep started with a roar.

"Yeah." With that, Edward fell quiet on the drive to his parents' house. Jasper had noticed something was wrong too, and had thought to mention it, and for someone who'd only known her a week…Edward was worried. Part of him just knew it had to be something with James, but it wasn't unusual for Bella not to talk about her relationship. It seemed there was a mutual dislike between her partner and her friends, and Bella being Bella, did whatever she could to make sure both sides were happy, even at her own expense.

Before he knew it, they'd arrived at the house. Esme's VW and Carlisle's Mercedes were both parked outside, but there was no sign of the Volvo.

Emmett helped Edward down out of the Jeep and they let themselves into their parents' house.

"Mama! Your boys are home!" Emmett bellowed.

"Emmett McCarty Cullen, use your indoor voice!" Esme scolded.

Edward laughed.

"Yes, Ma," Emmett answered with a pout while Rose giggled.

"Can I help with anything, Esme?" Rose offered.

"No thanks dear, I've got everything under control. Carlisle is in his study but should be out in a few moments," Esme said before ducking back into the kitchen.

Emmett flopped down on a sofa and reached for the remote for the television mounted to the wall. Rose settled in next to him and Edward eased himself down into one of the wide arm chairs and watched Emmett channel surf. He heard a car pull up and his mom bustled through the room to the front door.

"Jasper! You came!"

"Yes, ma'am," he drawled, grinning. "Not sure I had much choice, between Alice and Emmett," he teased.

Alice poked her tongue out at him and danced up to give her aunt a hug before entering the house.

Esme hugged Jasper and tried to take the grocery bags from him. "Let me take those and stash them away."

"Just lead the way, and I can do it, Esme. I don't want to trouble you."

"Psh." Esme scoffed, but led him inside. Jasper followed her through to the kitchen, and emerged a moment later with a bemused smile.

"Where's Bella?" Alice asked, standing in the middle of the room, her tiny hands in fists on her hips.

"Eddie said she said she wasn't feeling well," Emmett reported, not shifting his gaze off the scores being displayed on ESPN. Edward wasn't even sure what sport his brother was getting the stats for.

"Edward?" Alice turned to him.

He shrugged.

"But-"

"Alice," Jasper interrupted before she could work up a full rant. "Maybe she just isn't feeling well."

Alice sighed and nodded, folding into the remaining space on the couch and Rose draped one arm over her shoulder in a hug.

"Dinner's in five. Someone go get your father!" Esme called from the kitchen. "Emmett get in here and set the table."

Emmett groaned and Edward levered himself up and went to retrieve his father from his downstairs study. He knocked on the door and stepped inside at the soft acquiescence from within. "Mom says dinner's on in five," Edward said when his father looked up from his desk.

"Oh, good," Carlisle said, slipping his reading glasses off and settling them on top of his papers on his desk. "I'm starved. How're you, Edward?"

"Alright. Worried about Bella, but physically it's a good day." Edward dropped into one of the chairs facing his father's desk. He didn't have any teenage memories of that particular room, but he had sat in that chair in front of that desk in another house, and every time he sat in one of those chairs, he expected to get a patient yet stern lecture about something.

"What's going on, son?" Carlisle sat forward, bracing his elbows on the desk, fingers steepled together in front of his chin.

"Jasper said something while we were having brunch this morning," Edward said, ignoring the arched eyebrow his father displayed. "He thought something was off about her, even though he hasn't known her very long, which got me thinking. She's been picking at food when I see her at meals, and she's been distant. And now not coming tonight…" he paused on a sigh. "Something's not right, Dad."

"Has she said anything?"

Edward shook his head. "Monday after orientation she said she was feeling off but said it was probably nerves. I think she might just be ill. You know how she is, she doesn't want anyone to feel burdened by her, but I think it's something else. I just have this feeling." Edward frowned.

Carlisle rose from behind his desk. "You may be right and you're worried over nothing, but I've never known your instincts to fail. Let her come to you, though. She may not be ready to discuss whatever it is."

Edward nodded and stood as well, and Carlisle clapped him on the shoulder. "Come on, your mom's going to have a fit if we're late for supper."

Edward managed a grin and went with his father to the dining room where everyone else had already gathered. Carlisle took his regular seat at the head of the table, and it didn't escape his notice that someone had maneuvered the seating arrangement so he was forced to sit between Alice and Jasper (not that he really minded). He took his seat, noting that Jasper held his chair like he had for Bella their first night, and had taken his cane to hang on the back of his chair, and Edward uttered a quiet thanks.

Esme had prepared a pork loin and a roasted chicken, her classic mashed potatoes, steamed broccoli and a tossed salad with her homemade buttermilk ranch dressing. "I didn't think to ask ahead, Jasper, so I prepared both chicken and pork."

"It's fine, ma'am," Jasper assured her. "I'm a carnivore through and through," he said with a grin and everyone laughed.

"Call me Esme, dear," she said, taking her seat at the other end of the table. "Dig in!"

Edward smiled at the sight of the familiar free for all as his family all but attacked the food. "Move fast," he advised Jasper in a stage whisper. "Alice and Emmett won't hesitate to clean the plates and leave us with the bones."

Carlisle and Esme laughed while Emmett pouted. "Thanks for the tip," Jasper said with a grin, taking the serving platter that Edward handed him.

"Don't worry Emmett," Esme consoled him. "When have I ever let you go back to campus without leftovers?"

Emmett grinned broadly and leaned over in his chair and kissed his mom loudly on the cheek. "I love my mama."

"As well you should with all she's put up with from you over the years," Carlisle mock chided, taking the platter from Jasper.

"Hey, when did this turn into pick on Emmett night?" Emmett protested, serving himself salad and broccoli before passing everything along.

"It's always pick on Emmett night, dear," Rosalie said sweetly, nodding her thanks to Carlisle as the tray continued around. "It's just because we love you."

Jasper chuckled quietly next to Edward.

"So, how was everyone's first week? Thank you dear," Esme said to Emmett as he passed the bread basket around.

"My classes are going to be fantastic," Rosalie declared, cutting a dainty bite of chicken as she spoke. "The physics students seem really excited about all the projects, especially the ones where they get a chance to destroy things."

"Doing the egg drop again this term?" Alice asked.

Rose nodded. "It's our first major project."

"What building are you using this year?" Emmett asked between motions of shoveling potatoes into his mouth.

"The library, as usual. We'll drop from the attic window, since I'm not allowed up on the roof." Rose pouted for a brief moment before grinning. "Hopefully we'll get a good turnout to watch the actual drop. I'm never sure if people want the eggs to survive or break."

Everyone laughed. "There's some appeal to watching them break," Jasper said. "The crack and splat of the broken egg landing, combined with the humiliation of the person whose container didn't work can be very entertaining."

"That's kind of mean, Jasper," Alice said.

He shrugged. "We like to see people fail almost as much as we like to see them succeed. How else can you explain the early audition episodes of American Idol and people who are so horrible they get record contracts?"

"You have a point," Edward mused, reaching for his water glass. "Though a lot of that is everyone believing that they deserve their 15 minutes of fame and getting so delusional they're unaware of the fact that they suck."

"But Jasper's right," Esme added. "If everyone weren't so obsessed with watching those reality shows and watching people make fools of themselves, no one would be so desperate for those 15 minutes."

"Now, Esme," Carlisle chided, a cheeky grin in place. "You're just as guilty as 'everyone.' I don't think I've ever seen you miss an episode of American Idol."

"I don't vote!" Esme protested as everyone laughed, and she shook her fork at Carlisle in a mock-threatening manner. Edward loved watching his parents interact. The love between them was so palpable even after their 32 years together.

"How 'bout you, Edward? Any Idol wanna-bees going through your program?" Emmett asked.

Edward shook his head. "Lara handles the vocal students, though yeah, I've got my share of divas," he said with a roll of his eyes. "A couple of my piano students are a bit stuck on themselves, but they'll get knocked down soon enough with audition season coming up and they figure out how hard they have to work."

"How many auditions do you think you're going to be preparing?" Alice asked.

"Hm." Edward counted in his head. He didn't have that many seventh year students. "Five, maybe. Most of the students aren't looking to go into serious music study for college."

"That's not too bad," Carlisle added. "How's the Jazz Ensemble going?"

"Really good," Edward said. The Forks Academy Jazz Ensemble already had quite the reputation for being an extremely good band, receiving top scores at every festival they visited. "I don't think we're going to give the Board any reason to pull our funding any time soon."

"Fantastic," Esme cheered.

Edward couldn't take all the credit; the program had been strong when he took over, but it had gotten stronger in the last two years. "We're going to add one new Festival this year with the extra funding. I just haven't decided which one. We'll be going to Salem, of course, and Lionel Hampton at U of Idaho, and the local one is a given. I think there's a couple others, but I have to check the schedule."

"That's a lot of travelling," Jasper commented.

Edward shrugged. "It's usually over a weekend, and it's great exposure for the school and the students. And it's a lot easier than a professional tour schedule, except in February. The festival in Salem is usually the first Saturday of the month, and we'll be in Idaho for the last Saturday, generally. The rest are more spread out."

Jasper nodded, and Edward got the impression he was thinking about their conversation over breakfast that morning and how much Edward missed being with the symphony. Traveling with the jazz band did fill that void.

"Are you touring this year?" Alice asked.

"Yeah. There's an event in Hawaii over winter break we've been invited to. There's another over spring break down in Southern California. Once I get the group settled next week, we'll start figuring out which we want to do. I don't think we can afford to do both unless the students pay for a share." Edward was excited about either of the possibilities, but he wasn't sure he could do both tours without a lot of support from the department and parents, but most of his students lived far from home, which made it hard to count on their parents for physical help.

"Somehow I have a feeling that won't be an issue," Rose said with a grin. "If they get the chance to go to both places in the same semester, I'm sure they'll be willing to pay."

"Will you need chaperones?" Alice asked innocently.

"I think we'll need someone more mature than the students, thanks," Edward managed straight faced.

Jasper snickered and the rest of the family burst out in laughter at Alice's expression. Edward nudged her gently in teasing and she kicked his shin under the table in retaliation.

"Children," Esme said with a roll of her eyes. "How about you, Jasper? Make it through your first week?"

"Just barely," Jasper replied. "The schedule's a bit tight, but I'm sure I'll manage now that I've gotten into a routine."

From there the discussion continued around the table with Alice talking about her classes and what students were showing promise, and the art show the school would be having at the end of the semester. Emmett gushed about the football team and their chances for taking State. As they talked, Edward felt his worry about Bella slip away while he focused on the friends and family gathered for the evening.

Alice and Rose helped Esme clear the table and fix up a plate of leftovers for whomever wanted them, plus Bella. While the coffee brewed and the ladies got the dishes into the dishwasher, Carlisle retrieved the box of dominoes from the hall closet for the second half of the family dinner tradition.

"Jasper, dear, do you drink coffee?" Esme called from the kitchen.

"Yes, ma'am," he responded, staying put in his seat like he'd been ordered, watching them bustle around to get everything cleaned up.

Esme, Alice, and Rosalie returned with a stack of small plates, a tray of coffee and cups, and a large chocolate cake, half of which, Edward knew from experience, would be going home with Emmet. Once the dessert and coffee had been served, they settled in to play a round of Mexican Train dominoes with the double twelves. Carlisle must've been wanting to make it an earlier night since he hadn't grabbed the fifteens or even the eighteens that Edward knew were stored with all the other board games his family had accumulated over the years.

"Have you ever played before?" Edward asked Jasper quietly as they set everything up.

Jasper grinned. "I think so. But you may need to help me out just a bit. Maybe just remind me how the game is played."

Edward didn't want to read too much into that statement, but the look in Jasper's eye told him that he probably wasn't reading it wrong. Holy hell. "It's been awhile since I've played, y'know," he said softly. He wondered just what his cousin had told Jasper about him while they'd been shopping.

"Me too," Jasper said with a shrug. "Guess we'll just have to figure it out together?"

Edward couldn't fight the smile he felt break out on his face, though he was fighting not to hold his breath in anticipation of Jasper's responses. "Yeah. I think I'd like that."

The grin on Jasper's face probably matched Edward's own. He nodded and turned to the pile of dominoes on the table, and Edward did the same, ignoring the looks from his family. He selected his tile to see who went first, and as usual, Alice won the draw. Eleven tiles went into each of their hands and Edward started sorting through his to get his plays lined up.

Esme passed around coffee and cake as they played, and everyone had a good time laughing and teasing each other for stupid plays and accusing Emmett and Alice of cheating. They fought over using the double zero tile, worth fifty points if left in a hand at the end of the game, and unspoken alliances were established for playing off trains and clearing tiles. Edward went out twice, Jasper three times, but it was Esme who won the overall game with the lowest number of points.

It took them a couple hours to get through the game, but the laughter made it seem like no time had passed at all.

Emmett and Rosalie left first with Emmett's goodie bag of cake and leftovers and hugs all around. Jasper retrieved his and Alice's cold groceries from Esme's fridge and thanked her and Carlisle for having him. Esme made him promise to return and Edward stood by with a grin, knowing she wouldn't take no for an answer and that Jasper had no excuse to say no. Edward was handed a plate for Bella and he, Jasper, and Alice got settled into the Volvo for the ride to the bar where Alice had left her car the evening before.

True to her word, Alice didn't pester Edward or Jasper about anything, just kept up a steady stream of conversation that didn't really require either one of them to participate. Edward kept glancing in the rearview mirror at Jasper, letting their eyes lock for a moment before he turned his attention back to the road so he didn't wind up killing them.

Alice kissed him on the cheek before she slid from the car when they arrived in front of the bar. "Thanks for the lift, Edward. Jas, you're an awesome shopping partner. We'll have to do that again some time."

"No worries, darlin'. I had a good time," Jasper assured her, sliding his long lanky body out of the backseat and resettling into the passenger seat.

Edward waited until Alice was in her car and sped off before getting back onto the road himself. "So, I'm not sure I'm quite ready to head back yet. Maybe we could go somewhere and talk?" Edward asked, feeling a little nervous.

"Sure," Jasper answered in his easy drawl. "Maybe not a bar, though."

Edward nodded. "I know the perfect place." He made the next left and headed into an older part of town, eventually parking in front of what looked to be an old run down diner.

Jasper looked at him skeptically.

"Trust me," Edward said with a grin, unfastening his seatbelt and sliding from the car. He heard Jasper follow.

The bell on the door rang as Edward stepped through. The diner smelled of fresh baked goods and deep fryers, and Edward knew from experience that the place had the best hamburgers in town, not to mention one of the best selections of pies anywhere. The waitress behind the counter waved and Edward stepped toward his favorite booth, snug in the back corner, and took the side facing the wall so Jasper could sit facing the door. He somehow knew that would make the other man more comfortable.

"What can I get for you boys?" The waitress asked. Her name tag read Maggie

"Coffee," Edward requested. "Cream and sugar."

"And you, hon?" She asked Jasper and Edward bit his tongue to keep from laughing.

"Is your iced tea brewed, or that fountain crap?" Jasper asked.

Maggie looked mildly offended and Edward caught Jasper's wink at her. "Brewed, of course," she answered, like it had been the most obvious answer in the world.

"Iced tea then, with lemon, please. You can keep the spoon," Jasper said with a grin, turning up the charm and the accent, Edward heard.

"I'll be right back, give you two a chance to look at the menu." She wandered off.

Edward opened his menu.

"You're really going to eat again after that meal?" Jasper asked, looking slightly shocked.

"Just pie," he assured Jasper.

"Ugh." Jasper made a face and settled back into the booth. "I can't even fathom eating anything else right now. Where the hell do you put it all?" he made a show of looking Edward up and down.

Edward felt his face flush slightly at the obvious ogling. "I work out," he said, borrowing one of Emmett's favorite excuses.

Jasper chuckled. "Yeah, I know. It doesn't bother you that I join you, does it?"

Edward hadn't expected that question. "Yeah, a bit, but don't worry about it. It's something I need to get over." Like his frustration with his playing, Edward still struggled with his self-confidence, especially letting strangers see him when he was vulnerable. "Besides, like I said the other day, you just seem to know when to back off, and I appreciate that."

Jasper nodded and their waitress arrived with their drinks and the cream for Edward's coffee. After Esme's super chocolate cake, Edward wanted something a bit tart, and ordered the key lime pie. Jasper merely looked green at the thought of more food.

"So tell me a bit more about yourself, Jasper," Edward said, leaning back into the cushions of the booth with his coffee cupped in his hands, watching the steam tendril upwards. "Why'd you leave the service?"

Jasper sighed and combed his hands through his hair. "It's kind of a long story," he started, glancing around.

Edward followed his gaze, and the place was empty except for the waitress on the other side of the place serving up Edward's pie, and the line cook doing something in the kitchen. "We have time…"

"The short answer is Don't Ask, Don't Tell," Jasper said softly as the waitress deposited Edward's pie on the table and asked if they wanted anything else before wandering back to the romance novel Edward had seen at the bar.

Edward arched an eyebrow and unwrapped his silverware, breaking off a small piece of pie with his fork.

"I was set up, I got caught, and I got thrown out," Jasper said, his features tight, and Edward felt bad for asking.

"Ah." How the hell was he supposed to respond to that? He speared another bite of pie to buy himself a moment as Jasper fiddled with the straw in his iced tea. "I'm sorry, I shouldn't have asked."

Jasper waved him off. "It's alright. It's just still a touchy subject that I don't talk about very much." He relaxed a bit, the tense set of his shoulders unclenching as he settled back into the booth.

Edward nodded, knowing the feeling all too well. "How about twenty questions, then," he suggested. It was childish and silly, but a good way to get to know each other a little better.

Jasper smirked and nodded. "Shoot."

"Hm." Edward took another bite and pondered for a moment. "Favorite color?"

"Blue and green," Jasper answered, stirring his tea idly with the straw. "Same."

"Blue," Edward answered with a small smile. "Why didn't you teach at university?"

"Didn't want to have to fight for funding to do research or do anymore research after finishing my dissertation," Jasper answered easily. "I just wanted to teach. Favorite guilty pleasure fast food?"

"Hm," Edward had to think about that for a moment. He didn't get fast food all that often. "Taco Bell, maybe. Or KFC. This place has the best burgers I've ever had, so I can safely rule out the majority of fast food places on that qualification alone. Same question to you."

Jasper grinned. "McDonald's," he responded. "But someday I may let you attempt to change my mind. Mac or PC?"

"What?" Edward laughed. "PC. Though I happen to love my iPod with a ferocity that has not been seen since Westley and Buttercup."

Jasper burst out laughing, the sound filling the diner and catching the attention of their waitress, who smiled and shook her head before turning back to her book. Edward chuckled, and hid his triumphant smile behind his coffee cup.

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**I'm now on twitter. Follow me at twitter . com / mgunby**


	6. Chapter 5: MiniChapter: Family Dinner

**Thanks to my two fantastic helpers, Naelany and wishingforlove81 for taking a look at this chapter for me. **

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By the end of the third week of the semester, Edward had hit his stride and felt that everything was well under control. He worked out with Emmett three mornings a week while Jasper did his thing, and on Tuesdays and Thursdays he joined Jasper in the cardio room where he mostly stuck with the elliptical machines. That gave Emmett two days off to do his own workout and relieved Edward of a bit of guilt for taking up all of his brother's time.

His students were working out well, and two weeks into solid rehearsals with the Jazz Ensemble, Edward was glad of the selections he'd made in the auditions. Things were beginning to gel together and it gave him a boost of confidence.

Edward was still worried about Bella. She'd all but disappeared in the last few weeks, and if he hadn't had Jasper's assurances that he'd seen her in the office, he would have thought that something had happened to her. As it was, when he did see her, she was a ghost of herself when she showed up for Sunday dinner the week before, her hair was limp around her face and there were dark shadows under her eyes. But as worried as he was, Edward couldn't help her if she didn't talk to him, so he forced himself to sit by and watch as she faded further away from all of them.

He just hoped that she'd ask for help before it got too late.

"Penny for your thoughts?" Jasper asked from the passenger seat of Edward's Volvo as they made the drive to his parents' house.

"You can probably guess," Edward said with a small grin. His relationship with Jasper was another thing that had progressed since that first week. Besides the workouts and breakfast most mornings, they'd also stopped at the diner after dinner at his parents' and Jasper had left room to sample the pie the previous week. Edward had had to bite his tongue to keep from saying 'I told you so,' at Jasper's reaction to the apple pie.

"Bella?" Jasper asked, interrupting Edward's thoughts again.

"Yeah."

Jasper's hand landed on Edward's shoulder and gave a comforting squeeze. "We're keeping our eyes on her," he said softly. "We're doing as much as we can right now. I know that you care about her, but you can't let your worry for her consume you."

Edward sighed. "I know. I'm trying." He flashed Jasper a small smile. "I'm just scared that we're going to lose her."

"We won't," Jasper said firmly, and again, Edward was surprised at how quickly Jasper had gotten himself accepted into their little group. "I promise, Edward, I won't let that happen."

Edward wanted to call him out on that, say he couldn't make promises that he couldn't keep, but bit his tongue, knowing that Jasper wasn't just placating him, but truly meant that he thought he could do it. "I know," he said again. He had to have faith that they could help Bella when she was ready, or when they, as a group, decided it was time for an intervention.

"It'll all work out, Edward." Jasper squeezed his shoulder again in support and withdrew his hand.

With Jasper's positive attitude, Edward found his anxiety ebbed. He knew the blonde was right, that he couldn't let this worry overrule his life when he had so much else going on.

They arrived at his parents' house to find the Jeep and Alice's little sports car already parked in the driveway. Edward and Jasper walked up to the house together and Edward let himself in, stopping in the foyer as he took in the living room.

The living room had been turned into something resembling a cabana. All the furniture had been rearranged and interspersed with the loungers and chairs from the back patio. An old beach movie was playing on the television, and Edward could hear the Beach Boys playing in the kitchen. It was also very warm, so Edward could only assume someone had cranked up the heat.

Jasper chuckled just behind him. "I'm guessing the plans for the outdoor barbeque have been cancelled due to weather," he said dryly.

Edward snorted. "This has Alice written all over it." Emmett had asked them to have one last barbeque while they could still lay some kind of claim to summer. Unfortunately, the weather had not cooperated, and it had been raining fairly solidly for the last three days. It was totally Alice to go over the top and give Emmett the party he'd missed getting.

"You're here!" Alice came charging through from the kitchen. "Come on, we're helping Esme make salads."

"Which means you're tasting while Esme and Rose do all the work," Edward teased.

"I helped!" Alice protested, dancing up to him and giving him a hug, then turning to Jasper and doing the same before linking their arms together and dragging Jasper with her. "I did some chopping."

Jasper followed along with an amused smirk on his face and Edward limped behind them.

"There's my other boys," Esme declared, stirring what looked like macaroni salad. "How're you both?"

"Good, mom," Edward answered as Jasper kissed her cheek lightly and she hugged him, then Edward.

"Lovely to hear it," she said, turning back to her preparations. "Your father and Emmett are trying to figure out how to grill the steaks in this weather," she said, waving to the patio visible from the kitchen windows. "I tried to get them to let me broil them, but they insisted."

"Let me see if I can give them a hand," Jasper offered, smiling at them all and ducking out the back door.

"What can I help with, mom?" Edward asked.

"Nothing, dear, Rose and I have it all under control. Why don't you have a seat and tell me about your week." She smiled at him over her shoulder while she worked on something at the counter.

Edward did just that, his gaze occasionally drifting out to the patio to watch Jasper with his father and brother and the grill. He turned back to the kitchen and saw his mother, Rose, and Alice all looking at him with matching amused expressions on their faces. "What?"

"Nothing dear," Esme said fondly with a knowing little smirk.

Edward rolled his eyes. "For some reason, I don't believe you, mother dearest."

"It's just nice to see you interested in someone, Edward, that's all," Esme said mildly with a shrug.

"Mom," Edward started after sigh.

"I know, I know," Esme said, smiling brightly, holding her hands up in front of her. "I'm trying very hard not to meddle."

Rose and Alice snickered and Edward simply rolled his eyes again and gave up. His family was crazy, but he loved them. They just wanted him to be happy. He remembered how his mother had been when they'd first met Bella, and if Bella hadn't turned him down, Edward was sure his mother would have been planning their wedding within a year.

Jasper came back into the kitchen, shaking his head and smiling fondly, moisture dripping from his longish blonde hair from being out in the drizzle despite the cover over the patio. "I can safely say that Emmett has no idea what he's doing when it comes to grilling."

Rosalie snorted. "At least he didn't burn the house down. With him it's all about flame."

"That's not surprising," Jasper commented, thanking Esme for the towel she handed him as he dried himself off. "It suits his personality."

Edward and Esme laughed. Jasper moved to stand behind Edward, letting his hand rest against the small of Edward's back. Edward leaned into the contact minutely, feeling more at ease with Jasper around. He'd noticed that more and more over the last few weeks, especially when they were sharing physical contact.

Carlisle stepped into the kitchen and announced the steaks would be done in a few minutes, and declined the towel Esme offered him. "I'd just have to get damp again in a minute," he said with a grin, pecking his wife on the cheek.

"Alright, help me get this all out into the living room," Esme announced. "Jasper, do you mind supervising the grill masters out there?" she nodded toward the back yard. "As brilliant as they are in their respective fields, I don't trust them to properly cook a bunch of steaks."

Jasper laughed. "Of course, Esme." His hand slid up to Edward's shoulder, giving it a squeeze before he stepped back outside, and Edward helped shuffle a few things into the living room, where they spread the banquet out over the coffee table.

It turned out that Esme's intuition was right. Emmett had gotten impatient and squirted lighter fluid over the coals, causing a flare up on the grill. Jasper was able to recover the disaster quickly before the steaks had been turned into hockey pucks. Edward thought Emmett (and his father, by proxy for letting Emmett do it in the first place) should have lost grilling privileges for awhile, but it wasn't like they'd be doing any outdoor barbequing again for several months, anyway. The rainy season was fast descending on Forks.

Dinner was fantastic as always, with Esme's homemade macaroni salad, baked potatoes and baked beans. Edward hid a smirk as he watched Jasper hold back on the food a little, knowing they'd be stopping at the diner on the way home like they had the first two weeks. The conversation was easy and familiar as old beach movies played on the television.

After the cleanup was finished from dinner (with Jasper helping since Esme declared he was no longer a 'guest') they settled back down around the coffee table for a berry trifle and coffee and a rousing game of Monopoly. Alice beat them all quite easily, effortlessly wiping everyone out with her strange strategies. It was early when they finished the game, but rather than start another, they simply sat around and talked some more, telling stories and embarrassing each other.

Alice was the first to leave, citing a date with Kate. Emmett and Rose followed shortly after, deciding to go catch a late movie. Edward and Jasper left a bit after that, a plate of leftovers for Bella in hand, and they headed for the diner.

A few booths and tables were occupied, but the waitress winked at them and waved them toward the back booth where Edward always sat and brought them coffee and iced tea without being prompted. He got the feeling they were quickly becoming regulars and got treated as such. Edward ordered a slice of chocolate pie and Jasper asked for peach.

They talked about high school, Edward revealing that he was a bit of a band geek and all around nerd, and Jasper let slip he had been a jock on the swim team and running cross country. They told stories about trips and tours, including Edward's experience of having to watch one of the drummers and the tuba player going at it under a thin blanket in the aisle of a tour bus one year.

Full of pie and warmed by the company, they headed back to campus two hours later. The ride was comfortable and mostly quiet save for the music coming from Edward's iPod. They were a few minutes from the turn off to the school when Edward finally spoke up.

"Would you-" Edward started, pausing to clear his throat. "I mean…"

Jasper glanced over at him, concerned, but a bit of humor shining in his eyes.

"Do you want to go out sometime?" Edward finally blurted out, mentally face-palming. "Like, maybe next Friday?" He bit his lip, sure he must look like an idiot. It'd been so long since he'd done anything more than have an anonymous hookup. But he knew something had been building between them for a couple weeks now, and that their ventures out for pie were almost mini-dates of their own. They just hadn't been official, not that they'd ever invited anyone to join them.

"Yeah," Jasper said after a long moment. "I'd like that."

Edward's own smile lit up at the grin Jasper flashed him. "No dancing. I promise." He recalled his stab at Alice the morning after the trip to the club the first week of classes.

Jasper laughed quietly. "How do you feel about planetariums?" he asked.

Edward laughed. "I haven't been to one since I was a kid," Edward said through his laughter. He'd have to think up something pretty creative for them to do Friday night.

"Me either," Jasper mused. "So, after dinner on Friday?"

"Sounds good," Edward agreed.

The quiet was a bit more comfortable for the last few minutes of the ride, Jasper and Edward both taking turns commenting on the music or dropping some random comment to each other.

"Can I walk you back?" Jasper asked, almost shyly after they'd parked.

Edward hesitated, but nodded. "Sure."

The walk to Edward's dorm was quiet, but they were both stealing little glances at each other. Jasper grinned when he caught Edward's gaze shifting away, and Edward's hand shuffled through his disorderly hair, feeling his ears heat up in embarrassment.

"Well, this is me," Edward said, outside the door to his side of the suite. The dorm was quiet around them, though it wasn't that late. He fished his key from his pocket. "Would you like to come in?"

"I think I should get going," Jasper answered softly.

Edward caught his frown before it could appear on his face. He found he wasn't quite ready to let Jasper go for the evening, but he didn't want to move too fast. There was something about the blonde that reminded him of a skittish colt; one wrong move and he'd bolt.

However, Jasper took the decision out of his hands when he brushed a light kiss across the corner of Edward's mouth, skimming his fingers over the stubble on his cheek.

"Good night, Edward," Jasper whispered, smiling softly as he stepped away.

"'Night, Jasper," Edward echoed, his voice soft and a bit gruff.

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end note: I'm going to try to update later this week, since this was such a teaser of a chapter. It'll probably be Thursday and Friday, which will become the regular weekly update.

remember to check out the blog (http:// reallifebandgeek . blogspot . com ) for sneak peeks, recs, and other randomness from me.


	7. Chapter 6: Bella part 1

And now, what you've all be waiting for/asking about. What exactly has been happening with Bella.

Thanks again to wishingforlove81 and Naelany for beta support, and to everyone leaving reviews. They make my day, truly.

Show Me A Garden has been nominated for an Indie! I can't tell you what that means to me :D voting opens on the 8th at:

http:// www (dot) theindietwificawards (dot) com

go read and vote!

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Jasper excused himself from his fifth period class, having forgotten a crucial handout for the last lecture of the week. He was glad it was Friday, looking forward to a quiet weekend and time with Edward. The music teacher was playing his cards close to the vest and Jasper had no idea what he had planned for the evening, other than they were going to Port Angeles. He'd be lying if he said his forgetfulness hadn't been in part due to his excitement.

Jasper sprinted up the flight of stairs to get to his office, hearing raised voices as soon as he exited the stair well. From the end of the hall, the words were unclear, but he could hear two distinct voices, male and female. He frowned, knowing there were classrooms on the floor.

As he got closer, the voices became clearer. The male voice was louder, and he was ranting about something the female had done, about some gala or other and how he'd been outshined by someone because of their date.

"You're a fat cow!" the male voice shouted. "No one wanted to have anything to do with me because you're a disgusting slob who no one wants to be around! How the fuck am I supposed to get anywhere in my career with a fat useless bitch like you on my arm?"

Jasper was just about to burst into the room and berate whoever it was for disturbing the hallway and classrooms when he recognized Bella's voice next.

"I've lost ten pounds," she protested in a soft voice, her voice thick with tears.

Jasper froze. She'd lost ten pounds? How quickly? No wonder she looked so frail and tired lately. She hadn't had the extra weight to spare, which led Jasper to his next conclusion – it was James in that room with her. He debated for another moment – did he go in and put a stop to it, or wait until James was gone so he didn't risk Bella getting hurt if James flipped out on the interruption?

His sense of chivalry won out as James' voice rose, yelling insults about Bella that no one should say to a lady. "It's bad enough that you hang around with that family all the time, despite my repeated orders for you not to! They all think they're so much better than me, and you agree with them, apparently, since you'd rather spend time with them than me, you stupid lazy cow. Are you sleeping with all of them? Got yourself a bit of a sugar daddy, eh? You think Doctor Carlisle is going to take care of you when you get knocked up like a common whore?"

Jasper sent a quick text to Edward and Emmett and opened the door and stepped into his office, quickly taking in James' position standing over Bella, who was cowering in her desk chair, tears streaming down her face.

"What's going on in here?" Jasper asked. "I could hear you down the hall."

"Fuck off, man, it's none of your business," James snarled. He was dressed in a suit, though the way he was hunched over Bella, Jasper could clearly see the shoulder holster and the standard issue pistol that looked like a Glock tucked under his left arm. It didn't appear that he was wearing a vest, though, which Jasper counted to his advantage.

"It's my office too, and that's my friend you've got in tears there, _man_, so I'd say it's some of my business." Jasper leaned semi-casually against the door frame, blocking James' exit but giving himself the best position in the room to watch things. "And I've got to say, from my perspective, it's time for you to leave." There was just enough edge to Jasper's voice to catch James' attention.

"It's alright, Jasper," Bella said quietly through her sniffles.

"No, darlin', it's really not," Jasper answered calmly, eyes on the still seething James. "It's not alright for him to say those things to you."

"Where the hell do you get off?"James rounded on Jasper, pulling his attention from Bella, which was Jasper's intent. He just had to keep James focused on him for another couple of minutes until Emmett or Edward got there, and he could get Bella out of the room. "Is she fucking you, too? Spreading her legs for another pussy who doesn't know what it means to put his life on the line every god-damned day. It's bad enough that she's doing that cripple on the side, but now a southern pansy like you?"

"James-" Bella started to interrupt but Jasper cut her off.

"Where the hell do _you_ get off?" Jasper threw back at him, feeling his temper flare as he let James' anger fuel his own reactions. "I'm not going to even dignify most of that with a response. I will tell you that I was a United States Marine, so don't lecture me on putting my life on the line, _boy_," Jasper sneered, allowing his annoyance and anger to flare. "Where I come from, no one is allowed to speak to a lady like that."

Hearing heavy footsteps and an awkward gait come down the hall, Jasper knew his reinforcements had arrived. He pushed off the door frame and stalked towards James, luring him away from Bella's desk, but trying to stay between James and the door. He was thinking about getting Bella out of that room and away from James in case things got physical.

"A lady?" James spat. "She sure as fuck isn't a lady with what she can do with her pretty little mouth."

Bella was bright red, tears swimming in her big beautiful brown eyes at James' words. But beyond that, Jasper thought he saw a bit of hope that someone else knew what was going on and would help her.

"See, it's comments like those that make me really not like you." Jasper grinned. "Bella, darlin', I think Edward's waiting outside. How about you get him to take you for some coffee and I'll come find you in a bit." He really didn't think she needed to see him beat the crap out of her boyfriend, if it came to that.

'Oh-okay," she stuttered. She rose shakily from her seat and gave the two men a wide berth as she neared the door. Jasper made sure to stay between her and James in case he decided to not let her go. She disappeared through it, and Jasper heard a quiet sob, followed by Edward's low, velvet voice, and a dark shape stood in front of the door. Emmett.

"Now you listen to me, and you listen good," Jasper said in a low voice, letting all of his dislike for the blonde man in front of him pour into his voice. He was surprised that James had let her out of the room, but apparently he wasn't quite as stupid as Jasper thought, knowing there were at least two other men on the other side of the door. "You stay away from her. I don't ever want to catch you in this office again. You can be assured I'll be speaking with the Dean about your appointment as our liaison with the police department, so that you have no reason to be on this campus, ever. Do I make myself clear?"

"Fuck you," James snarled and made a movement with his right hand that instantly set Jasper on guard.

"Sorry darlin'," Jasper drawled with a wicked grin. "You're not my type."

When James rounded on him, it was all too easy for Jasper to take him down. He may have been a cop, but whatever hand to hand training he'd ever had was either a long time previous, or he'd sucked at it. Either way, he let his anger fuel his movement and Jasper, more centered, was able to block his attack and land a quick punch to his gut, knocking the wind out of him. Jasper didn't want to hit him in the face and give him any ammunition to seek retribution on Bella. Once he was down, Jasper quickly disarmed him, taking the gun from the holster and ejecting the clip into his palm and checking the barrel.

While James panted for air, Jasper stared him down. "I mean it," he growled. "I don't want to see you around here again. Next time, it won't be just me. I'm sure you've met Emmett?" He tossed the useless gun at James' feet.

At his name, Emmett came into the room, looking as much like a big angry bouncer as Jasper'd ever seen him.

"You won't keep me away from her," James gasped, but managed to pull himself up after retrieving his service pistol and stagger to the door. He flinched away from Emmett, but turned and glared at Jasper. He looked like he wanted to say something, but thought better of it, weaving slightly on his feet on his way out the door.

Jasper sighed and sat on the corner of his desk. "Bella's alright?"

Emmett shrugged. "Edward got her out of the building. She looked a mess, but she's tough." He crossed over to where Jasper was sitting and perched next to him, the desk creaking with his weight. "What the hell happened?"

"I came up at the beginning of class for something I forgot and he was in here yelling at her. Shit. Class." He scrubbed his hands through his hair. He glanced at his watch. He'd missed the first ten minutes of class.

"Cancel the rest of your classes today. I'll take care of Bella's. You need to go see the Dean, like right the fuck now," Emmett said. "Text Edward and he'll keep Bella in a holding pattern until you get there."

"Edward doesn't have classes this afternoon?" The implications of his actions were just falling into place in Jasper's head. Cancelling classes for a personal matter reeked of professional misconduct. But then, so did going to class with his head anywhere but on what he was teaching.

"No, he cancelled his lessons this morning. It was a bad day for him," Emmett said simply.

As much as Jasper wanted to puzzle out that statement, he already had too much going on in his head. He nodded, turning and reaching into his desk for the 'class cancelled' forms, slipping the clip from the gun under some papers at the same time; he'd take care of it later. He scribbled out the information, including the homework the students would need to complete before the next class, and found some tape to affix them to his door. He handed Emmett a few forms as well, and neither of them spoke for a couple minutes.

"Hey, Jas, man," Emmett finally said. "What you did for Bells – that was alright. Thanks."

Jasper nodded. He wished he'd seen it sooner, because he knew from experience, that wouldn't be the last they saw of James.

"Look," Emmett said. "We've all known that something's been up for awhile, because you saw it. Don't beat yourself up. You've stopped it before it got physical, and now we'll make sure she's alright."

Jasper nodded again. "He's not going to stop, you know that."And it was suddenly very likely that James would go after Edward for being the one that physically removed her from the building. That, and Jasper knew that James had some real issues with Edward's relationship with Bella. He didn't regret what he did, but he kicked himself for not considering the consequences. "He's going to keep coming at her until she's completely his, or no one's."

Emmett shrugged. "We'll keep her safe."

Jasper just hoped they could. "Yeah."

"Where's your class? I'll take care of this stuff. I'll call Alice and Rosie and have them meet back at our place, and I'll go get some pizzas and beer and we'll get this sorted, alright?" Emmett focused on Jasper, his gaze steady. "Jasper, man, I'm serious. You did good. I know you're not shaken up about what happened, literally, because you're a bad-ass soldier man underneath that professor-ly exterior. So what's up?"

Jasper shook his head. "We'll talk later, alright? Let me go talk with the Dean and get that ball rolling at the very least."

Emmett clapped him on the shoulder. "I'm not letting it go, you know that," he said seriously. "You may have just saved my little sister's life, and I'm not about to let that fuck you up in the head anymore than you already are." Emmett spoke with a bright smile despite the seriousness of his comment, and probably not for the last time, Jasper was grateful he had the Cullens in his life.

"Hear you loud and clear," Jasper said, sliding off his desk and handing the forms to Emmett, relaying his class location. He grabbed his bag from his chair and left the office at a brisk pace, calling ahead to Esme to see if Dean Harper was available. "Esme? It's Jasper. Is the Dean available?"

"Of course, Jasper. Edward already called." Esme's voice was slightly raspy as if she were fighting back tears. "He's expecting you."

"I'll be there in five minutes," Jasper said gently. "She's going to be alright, Esme. He didn't hurt her, not physically."

"Thank God," she breathed. "All Edward said was that you had walked in on James and Bella and asked him to come get her, but that she was okay."

"He was screaming at her and I could hear it down the hall. We may need to find out of any of the students heard anything." Jasper made a mental note to speak to the Dean about that as well.

"Did you hit him?"

Jasper smiled, hearing the mix of righteous anger and pride in Esme's voice. She was like a mother duck protecting her chicks. "Just once and nowhere it'll show."

She coughed lightly and Jasper could tell she was fighting back a laugh. "Thank you, Jasper. I need to go, but I'll see you before you leave. Go ahead and go into Dr. Harper's office when you get here."

"Thanks, Esme."

She disconnected the call and Jasper quickly texted Edward, letting him know he was seeing the Dean and would find them when he was finished, before they went back to his suite for the night. Edward replied that they were in the dining hall and would wait for him there.

Jasper reached the administration building and found Esme's desk abandoned. Though he'd been told to go straight in, he tapped on the door to Dr. Harper's office and waited for him to give permission before he entered.

The Dean was seated behind his desk. Jasper took one of the chairs facing the mahogany monstrosity, windows behind the Dean showing a peaceful campus as students rushed between classes.

"Dr. Whitlock, I just received a very disturbing call from James Hunter, saying that you assaulted him in your office." He looked at Jasper sternly, his arms folded in front of him on the desk.

"Yes, sir," Jasper answered, thinking that James was fast to cover his tracks. "Did he explain why?"

"Something about you attempting to seduce his girlfriend, Dr. Swan. That you were not responding well to her denial of your affections and when he tried to remove you, you assaulted him." Dr. Harper was trying to maintain a poker face, but Jasper could sense the rage within the man as the corners of his mouth twitched. The Dean had to know how bogus that argument was, given Jasper's history.

"Ah. Would you allow me to clarify what happened, sir?" Jasper remained seated at attention. "I'm sure you will be able to find someone in the building to corroborate my story."

"By all means," the Dean responded with a wave of his hand.

Jasper quickly recounted his story of the events, with a bit of narration to describe how he'd noticed Bella fading away from her group of friends and family, and how she'd begun to look desperately frail in the last several weeks. By the time he'd finished, Dr. Harper looked visibly angry, though Jasper could tell none of that anger was directed at him.

"Was Detective Hunter armed?"

Jasper swallowed and nodded. "Yes. There was a gun in his shoulder holster. I disarmed him, removed the clip from his weapon and returned the gun to him. The clip is secure in my office." It wasn't the safest place, Jasper knew, but he hadn't wanted to carry the damn thing around with him.

"May I ask why you didn't trigger a lock down?" Dr. Harper asked.

"I didn't think it was necessary to lock down the entire school," Jasper said somewhat defensively. "I don't think he was going to physically harm Bella at that moment, and I believed that despite the situation, there was no risk to the students or other faculty. Also," he continued. "Detective Hunter knows the contingency plans, having helped to establish them, and I didn't think that the stress of a lockdown situation for the campus community would have been worth it, given the situation."

The Dean was quiet for a long moment. "I agree with your assessment, Jasper. Where is Dr. Swan now?" he asked softly.

"Edward Cullen is sitting with her in the dining hall," Jasper explained. "Emmett Cullen took care of notifying our classes for the cancellation for the rest of the day, and I'm on my way to the dining hall when we're finished, sir." Jasper felt a bit more at ease now that someone in authority knew what was going on.

"Alright." Dr. Harper sat back in his chair with a large sigh and met Jasper's gaze. "First, thank you for your quick actions and getting Dr. Swan out of that office. Second, you did exactly right coming to me with this. I'll be calling an emergency meeting of the board and the safety committee and talking to the police chief about getting another officer assigned to the campus liaison position. I'm not exactly happy that you've cancelled classes for today, though I understand why you've done it. I assume that you've posted the assignments for your students?"

Right there, Jasper decided that Dr. Harper was an excellent administrator. Despite everything, he knew where the priorities were; making sure Bella was safe, and that the students continued to get their education. "For my part, yes. Dr. Cullen handled cancelling Bella's classes, so it's not likely."

Dr. Harper nodded. "Okay." He sat quietly for a moment, obviously thinking. "We'll be contacting the teachers in the rooms around your office to see if anyone heard anything that we need to explain. If you think of anything else you need to tell me, please feel free. My door is almost always open."

Jasper recognized the dismissal. "Thank you."

"Please let Bella know that as well," the Dean said as Jasper rose.

"I will." Jasper exited the office and closed the door behind him feeling drained at all the emotions he'd dealt with. Half in a daze, he made his way to the dining hall. They weren't open for dinner service yet, but the coffee stations were always open and there was always a clerk ready at the register to serve the community between classes. Jasper used his I.D. card to pay for two coffees and a hot chocolate and he glanced around before he spotted Edward's familiar head of hair in a far corner of the room.

Jasper barely set the cups on the table before Bella flung herself at him, wrapping her arms around his neck and sobbing into his chest. He caught her easily. "Hey, now, it's alright," he said quietly, rubbing her back lightly.

Edward was watching, a bit of a smile on his face, though his eyes were dark and sad. He seemed to be asking if Jasper was alright, and the blonde had to shake his head no. They could talk later.

"Did he hurt you?" Bella gasped out between sobs, her voice muffled against his chest.

"No, darlin', he didn't," Jasper said. He held her until she went quiet and pulled away, wiping at her face with the palms of her hands. He led her to a chair between himself and Edward and pressed the cocoa into her hands. "Drink," he ordered gently. "It'll warm you up."

She nodded and cupped the mug in her hands, huddling down a bit. She blew across the top of the mug before drinking.

Edward's hand came across the back of her chair and Jasper felt his cool fingers against his neck, stroking lightly against the soft skin there. Jasper flashed him a small smile over the top of Bella's head, a promise that they'd speak later.

"I talked to the Dean," Jasper said quietly, toying with his own mug. "They're going to get another officer to serve as the campus liaison. He won't have any official reason to be on campus anymore."

Bella nodded, eyes fixed on her cocoa.

"I'd like you to stay with someone else tonight, love," Edward spoke softly. "James is going to be very angry, and I don't like the idea of you being home alone, even with Becky there. Even though he has a master key-card, he wouldn't know where to find you if you're not there."

Becky Torres was Bella's suitemate. "I can stay with Alice," Bella agreed. "What about my office?"

"I'm not sure we can change that, but we'll work something out." Jasper paused. He wanted to ask her if she'd finally see reason and leave him, but he'd rather do that in a more private space. "We'll keep you safe, Bella. I promise."

She nodded again. "Can we leave?" She asked in a small voice.

"Of course. Emmett's going to get pizzas, would you like to come back to our place?" Jasper asked gently, like he was giving her a choice.

"Yes, please." Bella looked up and gave him a small smile that didn't quite reach her eyes, but then, her eyes no longer looked as dead as they had. Sad, hurt, defeated, but not the emptiness he'd seen in them of late.

"The girls will join us after classes," Jasper said, holding Bella's chair for her as she rose. "Will that be alright?"

"So long as Alice brings the ice cream," Bella managed to joke, and Edward chuckled.

"I'll call her. Why don't you give me your key, and I'll run to your room and grab what you'll need for tonight," Edward offered.

"What if James is there?" Bella responded. "I don't want him to hurt you."

"Hey," he said in a gruff voice, playing up his offense. "I've got a deadly weapon right here," he said, spinning his cane, which made her smile. "I doubt he'll come back so soon, love," Edward assured her. "But if it will make you feel better, we'll go drop you off at Jasper's, and then Jasper and I will go together, okay?" He hugged her with his right arm, balancing most of his weight on his left leg and cane.

Bella returned the hug with a sniffle and nod. "Yes."

"Good." Edward shifted her and took her hand so he could walk a bit more easily and led them out of the dining hall.

Jasper gathered their mugs and deposited them for cleaning on the way out. He sent Alice a text as they walked, asking her to pick up ice cream, and got a reply a moment later that she was already at the store and had the situation under control.

Bella clung to Edward's hand on the way back to the dorms, and Jasper walked just a pace behind them, keeping his eyes open. That didn't last long, however, because Bella reached back for him and took his left hand in her right, effectively sandwiching herself between the two of them, and they walked that way back to Jasper's building.

Jasper settled Bella in his room, giving her free reign over the bookshelves and apologizing that he'd left his computer and iPod in his office.

"It's alright," she said quietly, toeing out of her shoes and climbing onto the bed. "I think I'm just going to curl up here for a while." She bit her lip and looked down at her hands, curled together in her lap. "Thanks."

Jasper smiled and kissed her forehead. "No trouble," he answered. He locked the door behind them as he and Edward headed back out.

"Are you alright?" Edward finally asked when they were clear of the building. He fished out his cigarettes and offered one to Jasper.

Jasper took it and waited for Edward to dig out his lighter, shaking his head. "No. Not really."

There was quiet between them for a few moments as they walked and smoked. "You may have saved her life today," Edward said.

Jasper sighed and combed a hand through his hair. "If I hadn't jumped into the middle of things I may not have had to," he said softly. "I put her in more danger by doing what I did today."

"Jasper, stop," Edward said, reaching for his hand and tugging, forcing him to stop walking. "You can't beat yourself up for this. We've all suspected there was something going on, and if you hadn't stopped it when you did, how far would it have gone? How much longer could we afford to wait? Until he started hitting her?"

"No," Jasper said in a strangled voice. "I wouldn't let it get that far."

"Then you can't blame yourself for stepping in and stopping it now, because you knew it was only a matter of time until it escalated, didn't you?" Edward fixed him with a stare that seemed as though he was looking straight through Jasper into his soul.

"Yes," Jasper answered quietly. He closed his eyes and took a deep breath, and released Edward's hand after giving it a brief squeeze. "Can we walk, please?"

Edward nodded, and they resumed walking toward Bella's building.

"When I was in high school, I was with this guy, Darryl," Jasper began quietly. "We were in the same class and we started fooling around the summer before senior year. I was more or less out to my family and friends and we lived in a liberal enough part of Texas that we didn't have to hide. We weren't too big on PDA, still being in high school and knowing enough about our community not to flaunt anything in their faces for fear of being run out of town.

"Darryl started getting paranoid when school started. He was constantly worried that I'd said something to the wrong person, so he started making sure he could reach me all the time. He'd call me at strange hours, checking up on me. He came from an influential family and said he didn't want anything to happen that could damage his family name. I could understand that, or so I thought, and went along with it, knowing what family means down south and how that damage could be irreparable. But slowly the paranoia started to transform into controlling behavior. He had to know where I was all the time. He wouldn't let me hang out with other friends, particularly men, slowly cutting me off from everyone.

"After Christmas that year, he accused me of sleeping with someone else. That was the first time he hit me. In six months he'd transformed into a man I didn't know instead of the young man I thought I loved." Jasper paused, taking a deep breath. "I tried fighting back, but that just made him even angrier. We played sports and that explained most of the bruises and marks. He was careful to never hit me in the face, but I wasn't so careful when I started hitting him back in self defense."

Edward's face was full of pain and sympathy when Jasper spared a look at him as they walked, shoulder to shoulder, hands brushing against each other, unaware of the rest of campus.

"I didn't tell him where I was stationed when I left for boot camp, though he could have found out pretty easily, since there are only two training bases for the Marine Corps," Jasper said. "I was able to get away from him and disappear, more or less. I learned after I got out that he married affluently within the community, which is why he never wanted anyone to know about us. He wanted his bit on the side, but only if he could control it."

"Fuck, Jasper," Edward said quietly.

Jasper shrugged. "I was lucky and got out. At least I learned from it and was able to keep it from happening again."

"When?" Edward asked.

"When I was working on my dissertation a couple years ago. I may have overreacted, but I'd sure as hell rather overreact than get sucked into that kind of relationship again." Jasper's hand brushed against Edward's as they approached Bella's room.

Edward let them into Bella's room and tugged Jasper close when he'd shut the door behind him. "That's why you don't trust people anymore."

It wasn't a question, but Jasper answered it anyway. "Yes and no. The other reason is why I was discharged from the corps, but I _really_ can't go into that today," he said with a small smile that he knew didn't reach his eyes.

Edward studied his face for a long moment and nodded before brushing his lips across Jasper's forehead. The contact was light, but still fully charged with promise between them, and Jasper understood it to be an action of comfort. "Help me pack some things for her?"

Jasper nodded, moving into the bathroom for her shower products, finding a basket that had to be hers, the large bottle of strawberry scented shampoo towering over the rest of the items. He grabbed the whole basket and carried it back into her room.

"Jas?" Edward asked softly, folding comfortable looking pajamas into an empty backpack. Jasper knew he wasn't going to like the question from the nickname that Alice had dubbed him with and the tone of Edward's voice. "Did James have a gun?"

"Yes." Again, Jasper answered simply.

Edward's eyes snapped up. Jasper met his glorious green eyes, watching the emotions flash through them. Anger, frustration, fear, hope all flickered through his eyes and across his face before settling on an unsteady mix as Edward sighed. "I'm not sure whether I should yell at you for being reckless or just thank you for being in the right place and knowing enough to keep yourself and Bella safe."

"I can tell you which I'd prefer," Jasper offered quietly with a small half-smile.

"Come 'ere," Edward said quietly and when Jasper stepped close, Edward hugged him. "Thank you."

Jasper lingered in the hug, breathing in Edward's scent, memorizing the feel of the lanky body against him as his eyes slid closed.

Edward's lips pressed against his own, and Jasper could practically feel the desperation, fear and relief in the motion. Jasper slid his hand up Edward's chest, feeling the other man's heartbeat under his palm. He felt Edward's hand at the juncture of his jaw and neck and though it was only slightly more than chaste, Jasper wondered how he was still standing. Electricity surged through him at the contact, like when Edward had taken his hand outside his building earlier, and he felt like he'd come home.

Edward's hand slipped back into Jasper's hair as he broke the kiss. "I'm glad you're alright," he whispered, his warm breath washing across Jasper's face as their foreheads rested together. He kissed Jasper once more. "We should get back," Edward said softly into his ear.

Jasper nodded and stepped out of the embrace, thoughts racing as he reached for the bag to stick the shower basket into it. He glanced around the small space and took the book from the dresser that Bella had positioned against the bed while Edward grabbed from fresh clothes from the closet. Jasper slung the bag onto his shoulder and they locked up behind them, pausing to leave a note on Becky's board that was vague, but let her know that Bella wouldn't be home.

They made their way back across campus in relative silence, Jasper's thoughts heavy. He still wasn't completely convinced he'd done the right thing, mostly because he was worried about James' authority and how he could easily get to Edward or Bella. Retelling his past for Edward had also dredged up ghosts Jasper would have preferred to leave buried, but Edward was just too damn easy to talk to. He doubted he'd get any sleep.

Bella was curled up in a tight ball in Jasper's bed when they returned. She resembled a kitten, her long hair splayed out along her spine like a cat's tail curved around its body. Jasper smiled fondly when he saw her, dragging the duvet from the foot of the bed to cover her, and she sighed softly, shifting into a more comfortable position.

"I'm going to run back to the office," Jasper said. Normally he'd go back after dinner on a Friday night, but he had a feeling they weren't going to be leaving the room. "I'll be back."

Edward nodded and slipped out of his shoes. "Do you mind?" He waved toward the bed.

Jasper shook his head with a tight smile. "Not at all. Make yourself at home."

The crooked grin he got in return was small and weak, but it still made Jasper's heart feel lighter.

He made his way back to the office in record time unsurprised to see that the card locks had been activated much earlier in the day than normal. When he got to his office, he found that the Dean had sent out a campus wide email alerting everyone that there had been a minor altercation in one of the faculty offices and that the security system had been activated in an attempt to keep unauthorized personnel out of the buildings. Everyone was asked to not admit any stranger to the buildings at any time. Jasper appreciated the man's tact and sensitivity to the issue, as well as the fact he took the potential threat seriously.

A separate email had been sent to Jasper and cc'd to Bella that James' i.d. card had been disabled, but they should be careful anyway.

Jasper gathered his things and looked over Bella's desk to see if there was anything she might want or need for the weekend. Having no clue about her organizational system or lack thereof, he decided he could come back with her later if she wanted something.

Final classes were letting out for the day when Jasper exited the building and he was caught up in the flood of students and faculty ready to get on with their weekends.

Weekend. Fuck. His date with Edward. Jasper wanted to hit James again for disrupting his plans. There was no way he and Edward were going to run off and leave Bella after the day she'd had and when there was so much for them to get sorted. First and foremost, they had to work on convincing her she needed to start eating again.

He shifted the strap of his bag to sit more comfortably on his shoulder and set off at a brisk trot for his building.

* * *

Part two should be posted next Thursday. :D


	8. Chapter 7: Bella part 2

Edward crawled onto the bed with Bella after Jasper left to go back to the office. He made sure he had his phone near in case anyone called, because once he settled down he wasn't likely to get back up any time soon. Bella automatically curled up toward him, resting her head in his lap as he sat propped slightly up against the wall his legs out straight in front of him. He'd been in so much pain all day that he'd had to cancel classes that morning, and now that the adrenaline was fading his pain was coming back tenfold. His fingers hesitated over the keypad of his phone, debating whether he should text Alice or his father to retrieve his pain meds from his room. Edward could live through the pain, but it might be easier on everyone if he was on something that took the edge off; they didn't need his pain induced bitchiness on top of everything else.

He pressed his speed dial one and waited for the call to connect.

"Hello?"

"Dad," Edward greeted his father.

"Hey, Son. You alright? Your mother called."

Edward managed a grin. "We're dealing," he said, stroking his hand lightly down Bella's hair. "Jasper's wrapping up some things, and everyone's meeting back at his and Emmett's for the night."

"Good," Carlisle answered. "Do you need something?"

"Yeah," Edward answered. "I need something for the pain," he said bluntly. He'd got over the shame of asking for painkillers when he'd finally let himself realize how much better he functioned on them. "I'm in Jasper's room, and I'm not sure I'm going to be able to get up again without them."

"Your mother and I will come by in…" Carlisle paused, probably to look at his watch. "Twenty minutes?"

"Okay. Thanks, Dad," Edward responded.

"No problem, Son. Take care of Bella."

"We are. I'll see you in a bit." Edward hung up after his father said his goodbyes. He set the phone back within easy reach and focused on the woman curled up with him. He could tell from Bella's breathing that she wasn't asleep, though she was putting up a good front. "Want to talk about it, love?"

"Not yet," she said quietly.

"Alright. You going to be okay with everyone here?" He brushed her hair back with his fingers to see her eyes were closed.

She nodded a bit. "Yeah. I think I want everyone around tonight. I'm a bit wobbly," she admitted.

"You're allowed, you know," Edward said lightly. "And we'll be here whenever you're ready."

"I know," Bella said softly. She gave a soft sigh and curled up a bit closer to Edward.

They fell into an easy silence, Bella's breathing eventually growing deep and even as she succumbed to the emotional exhaustion of the day. Edward closed his eyes and tried to focus his energy on distracting himself from the pain that was rapidly becoming intolerable as the last of the pills he'd taken that morning wore off. He found himself in some level of pain more often than not because he refused to get himself addicted to the pills. His doctors (and father) had assured him that if he followed dosing directions, he shouldn't get hooked, but he didn't want to risk it.

Trying to distract himself, he hummed quietly, having left his iPod in his room when he'd left to respond to Jasper's text. He really needed to get back to those meditation techniques he'd learned a year or so previously in an effort to better manage his chronic pain. They had worked, on some level, but Edward had stopped practicing them when things had gotten busy. He was trying to focus his breathing when the door opened.

"Hey," Jasper's voice greeted him.

"Hey," Edward answered, not opening his eyes.

"Are you alright? You really don't look good," Jasper said softly.

Edward could only imagine. He was probably an unhealthy grey or green, and pasty looking. "Yeah. Pain killers wore off."

"Shit," Jasper swore softly. "What can I do?"

"Nothing," Edward said, trying to sound casual. Like Jasper needed anymore shit to deal with. "Dad's on his way." He heard something unlock, and assumed it was Jasper making sure the door was open.

"Edward," Jasper said softly, his tone admonishing.

Edward felt the mattress shift under him, and he nearly opened his eyes to see how the hell all three of them (well, two and half, Bella was so tiny it made his heart ache even more for her) were fitting on the twin bed. Bella sighed and shifted slightly, putting some of her insignificant weight onto Jasper, he assumed, soaking up as much warmth and contact as she could. She'd been a tactile person as long as he'd known her. With his eyes closed, he jumped slightly at the warm hand that rested at the base of his neck and then relaxed minutely. The touch was comforting, and helped Edward center his thoughts.

He heard the door open and a trio of voices, finally opening his eyes. The lights hadn't been turned on, so the room was sparsely lit from the little daylight left, but Edward easily distinguished the forms of his cousin, mom, and dad.

"Hey," Edward greeted them, feeling the warm hand slide down his neck and he looked over to see Jasper rising and moving out of the way as Carlisle stepped up.

Alice jumped into Jasper's arms for a hug, burying her face into his neck because, Edward assumed, she couldn't get to him or Bella. Jasper seemed to take it all in stride, moving back to the window ledge and talking to her softly.

"I've got an injection for you, Edward, will that be alright?" Carlisle asked quietly as Esme perched at the end of the bed, lightly gripping Edward's left ankle and gave it a squeeze. "It'll be faster acting."

"Yes, please," Edward answered, hearing the desperate note in his voice and not caring. It was only his friends and family around, and though it'd taken him a long time, he'd learned to trust them with his weaknesses. His eyes slid closed again, listening to the low murmur of Jasper and Alice's voices and the steady breathing of Bella in his lap.

He heard Carlisle rummage around in his bag, and Edward once again focused on his breathing while he waited the indeterminate passage of time until he heard Carlisle's warning "bit of a pinch" and felt the needle being pressed into his arm. It was only a span of a few heartbeats before the drug was circulating through his system and the pain began to recede into a not-so-distant memory.

"Thanks," he breathed, opening his eyes and focusing on his father.

Carlisle patted his shoulder and taped a band aid over the injection site. "Anytime, Son."

Edward turned his attention to his mother, still at the foot of his bed, holding onto his ankle, looking like she'd been through the wringer. "I'm alright. We're alright, Mom." He shifted, passing Bella over to Carlisle so he could sit up and give his mom an awkward hug from his position on the bed.

"I know you are," Esme whispered. "But you're all my kids, and I was worried."

Before Edward could say anything, Emmett strode into Jasper's room from the adjoining space, Rose on his heels. Emmett paused when he saw everyone, unsure what to do, and leaned against the wall. Rosalie went straight for Alice, who wriggled off the window ledge and met her half way in one of those disturbing displays of estrogen that Edward usually avoided. But after the day they'd had, he couldn't really blame them.

Bella came awake with a start, but Carlisle soothed her as she took in everyone around her.

"Hey, Bells." Emmett said from his place against the wall. Edward realized he didn't want to frighten her.

"Come here and give me one of your hugs, Em," Bella all but demanded, sliding from the bed and standing at Carlisle's side.

Emmett laughed and crossed the room in two strides. He scooped her up and held her to his chest, her legs curling around his hips and her face burying in his neck as he crushed her to him.

"We're going to go, Edward," his father said softly. He pressed a small packet into Edward's hand. "In case you need something later tonight. My phone will be on all night, and if you, or anyone, need anything, don't hesitate to call, alright?" Carlisle was using his Dad and Doctor voice, so there was no arguing with him. "We'll see you all for dinner tomorrow night."

"Thanks, Dad." Edward embraced his father as awkwardly as he had his mother. Esme rose from the bed and demanded that Emmett let Bella go so she could get a hug as well. They had a hushed conversation and both were wiping tears away when Esme backed off and took Carlisle's hand.

"See you kids tomorrow," Carlisle announced over his shoulder as they left.

"Alright, who wants pizza?" Emmett boomed. "I'm starved."

Rosalie thwacked him on the back of the head with her open palm and everyone laughed a little, a bit of the tension lifting from the room. Edward knew none of them thought this was just another Friday night, but between all of them, he knew that they'd see Bella (and Jasper) through everything that had happened.

Alice and Rose went into Emmett's room to grab pillows and the beanbag chair that Emmett had had since he was ten so there'd be enough seats for everyone, and Emmett shuffled Bella into the kitchenette to get her started on whatever alcohol he'd purchased. Edward and Jasper were left alone in the room for a moment, and neither of them moved, Edward on the bed, Jasper still sitting against the window.

Jasper seemed to have withdrawn into himself within the last few minutes and Edward puzzled over the cause. He figured, looking at the blonde, that maybe everything had just finally caught up with him.

"Jas, Eddie, you want pizza?" Emmett called from the kitchenette.

"Don't call me Eddie," Edward responded automatically. "Yes, please. You get any pop?" He didn't want to add alcohol on top of the painkillers in his system.

"Yeah," Emmett called back, and Edward heard and laughed at the muttered "pussy," from Emmett, though he knew his brother didn't really mean it. His response to most tense situations was inappropriate humor.

At Emmett's call, Jasper pushed off the window ledge and shuffled across the room. "Shit, Emmett, you buy the whole store?" Jasper asked in a dull voice as he peeked into the kitchenette.

Also typical Emmett, Edward thought. A mountain of junk food had probably taken up residence on their counter. His brother would do whatever it took to make sure they were all happy, and sometimes food was the easiest way. "Here, bro," Emmett said, handing Edward a plastic plate with two slices and a bottle of his favorite root beer.

"Thanks, Em." Edward took the offerings and shifted on the bed, putting his back against the wall so there was room for others on the bed next to him. Normally he'd have vacated for the girls, but he didn't think he could cope with the floor or the ubiquitous chair at the small table.

Bella came back into the room with a slice of pizza and a drink that they'd termed 'cheerleader beer;' something fruity and fizzy in a bottle. She settled next to Edward on the bed, tucking her legs underneath her. She took a long pull off the bottle (fuzzy navel, Edward read) and picked at her pizza.

Edward was tempted to chide her to eat, but let her go at her own pace, watching as she picked off toppings and ate them slowly. Edward worked on his own two slices as Jasper entered the room again, settling on the floor between Edward and Bella, setting down a bottle that matched Edward's rather than the beer he'd expected to see, and a plate with a couple of slices.

"Here, Jas," Alice said, tossing him a pillow. Jasper caught it easily and tucked it between himself and the bed frame with a smile of thanks.

Emmett came through next with the piles of junk food and spread everything out on Jasper's table. There were a couple bags of chips, a bucket of red licorice, a tray of fudge brownies, a pound bag of M&M's, a bag of salt water taffy and gummy bears. Rosalie and Alice laid out the rest of the pillows and blankets on the floor and Emmett came back with the pizzas, two four-packs of Bella's drink (Alice and Rose helped themselves to those) and a six pack of beer. He flopped down in the beanbag chair and helped himself to a slice of pizza while Alice climbed onto the bed with Bella and Edward, and Rose settled on the floor. Edward wondered if Bella realized their strategy in surrounding her.

"You need to eat, honey," Alice said softly to Bella, breaking the momentary silence. "You've gotten so thin."

Edward saw that she'd picked the toppings and cheese from her pizza but left the crust intact.

"James said I was a fat cow," Bella whispered. "He said I was disgusting and that he'd lost the promotion he'd been vying for because of the way people reacted to us together at the gala a few weeks ago." She ducked her head, letting her hair spill around over her shoulders and around her face.

Edward opened his mouth but Alice shot him a look that made him snap his jaw closed. Apparently this was a discussion the girls needed to have first. Rosalie moved up on the bed to sit just on the edge between Alice and Edward, facing Bella.

"Starving yourself for your man isn't going to get you anywhere," Rosalie said firmly. "If he's asking that of you, then he doesn't care about you, no matter how many times he apologizes for his behavior and says that he does it because he loves you, he doesn't. No one would ask you to put your health at risk if they truly loved you, Bella."

Edward had the feeling Rose was speaking from experience, given her former career as a model. He stayed quiet, but reached for a bit of Bella's hair, pulling it away from her face and twirling it around his fingers.

"He was lying, Bella," Alice added. "He wanted to control you, and he did it however he could. You realize you haven't been to see Carlisle and Esme in a month?"

"No, it hasn't…" Bella paused. "It's been that long?"

"Yeah, honey, it has," Rose said gently.

"Oh, God," Bella breathed. "I hadn't realized…"

"We know," Alice assured her. "We thought maybe something was wrong, but we didn't want to jump to conclusions in case it was nothing. But don't you see, he cut you off from all of us?" she asked, reaching for one of Bella's hands. Alice's eyes were wide and entreating, shining with tears she was trying to keep from falling. "He doesn't love you, Bella. He just wants you as a prize." The tears finally spilled over and Alice wiped them away hastily. "Tell me he never hit you, Bella, please," Alice begged.

Bella shook her head, her own tears silently coursing down her cheeks and Alice let out a quiet squeak and threw her arms around Bella, hugging her close. Rose joined in and Edward watched Jasper get up from the floor and head into the bathroom, returning a moment later with a roll of toilet paper. He handed it over with a shrug and a sheepish grin.

Edward let out a sigh of relief he hadn't known he'd been holding at Bella's denial. The verbal and emotional abuse had been enough. Edward didn't know what he would have done if the bastard had hit her as well. He met Jasper's eye and saw similar relief written there, and in the slump of Emmett's shoulders.

"We're going to help you, Bells," Alice said in a rough voice. "You don't have to go back to him."

Bella nodded, looking up and wiping tears from her cheeks.

"It's not going to be easy," Jasper said quietly from where he was leaning against his wardrobe. "He's going to try to get you back. He can't stand losing that control over you, and he'll do whatever it takes to try to get you back at his side."

Bella shuddered.

"We'll keep you safe, Bells," Emmett said.

"His key card has already been deactivated," Jasper said, and it didn't escape Edward's notice that no one was using James' name. "So he's not going to be able to get into buildings without help."

"And if you want, you don't have to go anywhere without one of us," Rose added.

"You're family, Bella," Edward finally said, having watched everyone else close ranks around her. "We love you, and we're not going to let anything happen to you."

"Wh-what if he comes after you, too? Jasper, he could have hurt you today? And Edward, he knows you left with me."

"Let us worry about that, darlin'," Jasper said. "You need to worry about getting yourself better, so you can kick his ass to the curb next time he comes around, y'hear me?" though he was grinning, Edward saw the hard edge in Jasper's eyes and he knew he was looking at the soldier that Jasper had once been. "We'll look after each other."

Bella nodded, hesitantly.

"Trust us, Bella," Edward implored her.

"I do. I will," she whispered.

"Good," Rose said. "I love you, girl, but you're stubborn." She hugged Bella one last time and slid back to the floor next to Emmett, leaning against him.

Bella managed a small smile and remained cuddled up with Alice. "So," she said in a quiet voice. "Emmett, give me a piece of pizza and another of these fuzzy things, and tell me what I've missed at the Cullen dinners for the last few weeks."

Emmett gladly did so, and they sat around and talked for hours. They all knew there was some serious healing yet to be done, but they made a good start of it. A large dent was put in the junk food as they sat around and entertained themselves with stories and welcomed Bella back into the group, though she'd never really left.

Alice eventually guided a tipsy and exhausted Bella out to stay at her place for the evening, and Emmett and Rose went with them, going to Rose's room for the night since they'd spent the previous Friday at Emmett's and they were trying to spread around the noise pollution a bit.

Jasper cleared up the mess, stuffing the leftover pizza into the fridge and the junk food into the cabinets before joining Edward on the bed.

"I'm sorry our plans for tonight got fucked up," Jasper said, out of the blue.

In the wake of everything, Edward had completely forgotten about their plans to go out after dinner. "Don't apologize," he said softly. "It wasn't your fault, and we can always reschedule."

"I know," Jasper sighed. "Do you know why I was up in the office anyway? I'd forgotten something for class because I was so fucking excited about going out tonight that it distracted me from what I'd been doing. So I guess you're as much responsible for getting Bella out of there as I am."

Edward turned slightly so he was mostly facing Jasper. He leaned forward and brushed his lips lightly across Jasper's. "You got distracted thinking about going out with me?" he said quietly, grinning.

"Yeah," Jasper said softly. Then the grin appeared. "It sounds so…high school."

Edward laughed lightly. "Funny. We're in high school, for all intents and purposes," he teased, trying to keep the mood light.

Jasper snorted. "So, how about next Friday?"

"Sure," Edward replied.

"Okay." Jasper was still for a moment. "Do you want to stay tonight? I can sleep on the floor," he said quickly.

"Thanks, but I should go back to mine. I need a shower, and if I stayed here tonight, you'd have to carry me home." Edward was serious, but he tried to pass it off as a joke.

"Okay," Jasper said again. "I'd offer to walk you home, but I'm afraid I'd fall asleep on the walk."

Edward laughed softly and started to get up. He brushed another light kiss against Jasper's mouth. "Stay, then. I can get myself home; have been doing so for a long time now."

"I know," Jasper replied. "But it's cold, dark, and I'm worried that James might be out there."

"I'll be fine, Jasper," Edward assured him. "Get some rest, and I'll see you for brunch tomorrow?"

Jasper nodded, tugging Edward closer for another kiss, this one a bit more lingering. "Yeah. You too, okay?"

Edward would most definitely sleep well. The painkillers he was going to take when he got home were going to knock him flat on his ass. "I will. Good night, Jasper."

"Night, Edward."

Edward let himself out and made his way quickly to his building, paying close attention to his surroundings. He saw nothing out of the ordinary, and he was relieved to get home and put the day behind him, knowing that there was much more to face the next day, but also so much promise.

* * *

**See, I told you they'd still get to go on their date. :D They just had to take care of Bella first.**

**Thanks again to Naelany and wishingforlove81 for being awesome betas and catching my random errors. **

**And a massive thank you to everyone who continues to leave fantastic reviews. I try my best to respond to all of them and leave you all with a little teaser for the next chapter, but sometimes I just run out of time. Remember to check the blog (http:// reallifebandgeek (dot) blogspot (dot) com for other teasers, recs, and random things (though I'm behind on my rec of the week).**


	9. Chapter 8: Prelude to a Date

wishingforlove and Naelany are my personal heroes for their beta work. Thank you, lovelies!

I know this chapter's a bit shorter. I may post the next bit earlier to compensate.

Thanks to all who voted in the Indies to keep Show Me A Garden in the final round for best storyline (non-ExB) WIP. I have fantastic readers!

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After everyone had left Friday night, Jasper found himself unable to decompress; he was wired from the events of the day and twitchy about the decisions he'd made and how it could affect everyone else. He had stayed quiet through most of the evening, letting the others be of more comfort to Bella, while he'd battled his old demons. Speaking with Edward about Darryl hadn't helped as much as he thought. He found himself empathizing with Bella a bit too much, and had withdrawn into himself a bit to keep from feeling too much. He really hadn't wanted Edward to leave; he and the others had kept the shadows from falling over him. But everyone eventually left for the night, and the darkness began to creep back in. Jasper eventually turned to his guitar, the beat up acoustic fitting easily into his embrace like an old lover, and he passed most of the night quietly picking out melodies and losing himself in memories of happier times with his mama as she taught him to play as a child. James' attack on Bella dredged up memories Jasper would have happily seen buried for the rest of his life, and that, almost as much as the thought that he'd put Edward and Bella at more risk kept him playing until well after dawn.

After a shower, Jasper dressed and headed for the dining hall. It was earlier than he normally met Edward for brunch, but he was restless and didn't feel like he could stay in his room any longer without going slightly stir crazy. Coffee and toast in hand, Jasper found a secluded corner against a window.

Just as he was about to make himself sick by second guessing his actions for the umpteenth time, a large shadow fell over him and he looked up to see Emmett setting his tray down across from him. "Stop it," Emmett ordered as he slid into the chair.

"Hm?" Jasper blinked at him.

"Over thinking it," Emmett said, picking up his coffee mug. "I can practically see the wheels turning, and any more and smoke is going to come pouring out of your ears."

Jasper sighed and nodded, turning his gaze to his nearly empty mug.

"What's up, Jas?" Emmett asked quietly. "You seem more rattled by everything than I would have expected."

Jasper shook his head. "Just second guessing myself. I know I had to step in before he got violent, but I can't help but think there was something else I could have done. I know he'll be back, and I just don't want him to take anything out on Bella or Edward."

"Edward can take care of himself," Emmett declared. "Seriously, man. Don't count him out because of the disability; he can still fight with the best of 'em if he's riled up enough and believe me, he's learned how to use that cane for more than walking." He smirked briefly. "Jasper, man , you gotta know that we're not going to let anything happen to either one of them. Bells isn't going to have much time to herself for awhile. Alice is making her the shopping buddy for today, and Rose is planning on asking her to meet on Sunday so they can grade papers and stuff together, if mom doesn't convince her to stay over tonight and hang out with her tomorrow."

Jasper nodded. He knew, intellectually, that they'd all be okay. They all cared about each other too much to let anything happen, now that they knew there was something to watch out for. But he was by nature, a worrier, and his stomach was still in knots for fear he'd brought something down on them, even though he knew without a doubt he couldn't have turned his back on Bella. Even if she hadn't been a friend, he'd not have stood by and let someone be spoken to the way James had yelled at her.

"What's the real reason you're so wound up?" Emmett asked, beginning to work through his breakfast.

"Bad memories," Jasper answered after a beat.

Emmett nodded, and that seemed enough to satiate him. "You've probably spoken with Edward, but if you need someone else to talk to, you know where to find me."

Jasper nodded. "Yeah. Thanks."

Emmett grinned. "So, you and Edward?"

Jasper rolled his eyes and smirked.

"You're good for each other," Emmett said after a laugh. He then turned the subject to something more general, for which Jasper was grateful. He finally went and grabbed some food, and when they were finished, they returned to the dorm.

Jasper shot Edward a text message saying he'd already eaten but would meet him for the ride to his parents' house for dinner.

Dinner at the Cullen's on Saturday was filled with a different kind of charged energy as Esme turned into full blown Mother Bear, but eventually relaxed when she realized that everyone was truly going to be okay. Edward was a bit quiet, which was understandable, Jasper supposed, but he couldn't help but feel like there was something wrong. When he asked, Edward shrugged it off, so Jasper didn't press. The conversation over desert at the diner was light and random, but they didn't stay as late as they usually did.

Sleep didn't come easily to Jasper on Saturday night, either, and he spent Sunday catching up on grading homework and putting together lesson plans for his classes. Midterms were fast approaching and he needed to get things cleared up so he could write his exams and make time to grade everything. He stayed logged in to an IM service most of the day so he could chat with everyone as he worked. Jasper kind of liked the isolated contact with everyone that way. It gave him the space he needed to breathe and do work, but also allowed him to speak with his friends.

After a day and a half away from the majority of the school's population, the rumors circulating through the dining hall at Sunday dinner were a bit of a shock to Jasper. Somehow the word had gotten out (not that Jasper was surprised) and the story was spun out of control. He heard that James had pulled a gun on Bella and that Jasper himself had stepped between them, taking a bullet, which is why his classes were cancelled for the rest of Friday afternoon. Jasper heard that he'd flown into a jealous rage and attacked James. All the stories had an element of truth but were blown completely out of proportion.

He got looks of awe from the female students as he made his way toward the Cullen table, and looks of admiration from the boys. It made him want to turn tail and run back to his room out of the spotlight. The only thing that stopped him was that he could see Bella sitting at the table with Edward, and if she was dealing with all the looks and gossip there was no way in hell he was just going to abandon her to the wolves.

"Hello all," he greeted casually as he took the empty seat between Bella and Emmett, Edward on Bella's other side.

"Good evening, Jasper," Esme said with a large smile, and the rest of the table echoed her.

Bella flashed him a small smile, her hair falling around her face in a curtain as she poked at her dinner. Jasper knew it wasn't going to be easy for her to just start eating again, but hopefully they'd all be supportive enough for her that she'd see that they just wanted her to be happy and healthy. James had really done a number on her.

Edward glanced at him, but Jasper noticed that he seemed strangely withdrawn, even for him. It was a different sort of quiet than the evening before; instead of just being there as a quiet positive presence, Edward almost seemed to be trying to feel invisible. Jasper tried to shrug it off, but he couldn't fight the feeling that he'd done or not done something since they'd parted after their trip to the diner for second desert the night before.

"What's got everyone so worked up?" Jasper asked as he started at his dinner, pushing Edward's odd behavior to the back of his mind.

"The Dean's going to speak," Alice answered. "He wants to address the rumors and talk about security. Didn't you get the email?"

"Ah. No." Jasper hadn't checked his email since morning. "Are there going to be changes?"

"Nothing major, at least according to the email," Alice said, glancing at Bella then Jasper. "The card locks are going to remain engaged for the next week while everything gets sorted."

Jasper nodded. "Seems like a good idea," he acknowledged. Even with James' ID card disabled, he'd still have daylight access to the academic buildings.

"That's what I said," Emmett added. "Hopefully the restrictions won't last too long; we don't want the students to feel like they're under lock and key."

"I'm sure they'll understand," Esme said, soothingly. "Especially with all the rumors flying around."

Jasper just nodded, glancing at Edward and Bella, both of whom had remained quiet throughout the conversation so far. Bella had eaten, though, and she smiled softly at him around her curtain of hair, a mug between her palms.

"Ladies and Gentlemen, may I have your attention please?" The Dean's voice boomed throughout the dining commons' sound system. It took a moment but eventually the chatter and sounds of people dining died down and silence mostly filled the room.

"I'm sorry for interrupting your meal, and I promise I won't take up much of your time," he continued. "But I needed to use this opportunity to discuss an event that happened on campus last Friday and put a stop to the rumors that have been floating around.

"Friday afternoon, one of our professors was verbally assaulted by her boyfriend, in her office, while classes were in session. Her officemate happened by and put a stop to the assault and disarmed the attacker, asking him to leave campus."

Jasper appreciated the Dean's tact in withholding their names, though he didn't see the point in it, since half the building had to have heard the fighting anyway.

"The man, James Hunter of Forks P.D. has been relieved of his position as the liaison with our campus Security committee, and in the next couple of weeks, we will be maintaining a heightened security state on campus, through keeping the card locks active on all buildings at all times."

The Dean paused for a moment. "I would ask you all to be aware of your surroundings for the next couple of weeks. Do not permit anyone to enter the buildings if you cannot vouch for their identity. If you order pizza, do not leave the dorm doors propped open for the delivery man to find your room. Ask them to ring from the outside phone; that's what they're there for.

"Now, to address the rumors that have reached my office. While trying to respect their privacy, I understand that it's nearly impossible to do so at this point. Bella Swan and Jasper Whitlock are both physically unharmed by the altercation on Friday. Dr. Whitlock was i_not_/i shot and neither was Dr. Swan. I am going to strongly encourage you to drop the rumors and focus on your studies. If you have questions or concerns, there will be extra counselors on campus beginning tomorrow morning."

The Dean paused again, clearing his throat softly before he continued. "In light of this event, I hope that we can all recognize that domestic violence of any kind is something to be taken seriously. We are a family here at Forks Academy, and I hope that any of you that are experiencing anything like this in your lives will feel safe and secure enough to find anyone of the members of this family to talk to and get help.

"Thank you all for your time. Enjoy the rest of your meal."

Voices started up again as the sound system was shut off. Jasper felt eyes on the back of his head, but he was more concerned with Bella. She was shaking and bright red, of embarrassment, Jasper decided, from not only having been the focus of that small speech, but also having had her failed relationship paraded out in front of the entire school.

But before Jasper (or Edward, who still seemed to be in his funk) could comfort her, a small group of students approached on their way out. "Dr. Swan?" a tiny girl asked lightly, apparently the spokesperson of the group.

Bella looked up, still a bright pink in color, and nodded at the student to continue.

"We're glad you're alright," she said softly with a timid smile.

"Thank you, Chrissy," Bella responded in a quiet voice, managing a small smile of her own.

The stream of students passing by their table continued throughout the rest of the evening. Bella's embarrassment at being the center of attention had faded somewhat as everyone wished her well and generally voiced their support. Jasper got a few quiet words of his own. At one point Emmett pouted that he was being left out and he had been there as a bouncer, which made everyone laugh and broke up a bit of the tension.

Eventually the staff chased them out of the dining hall and they wound up at Bella's room after saying goodnight to Esme and Carlisle. Her room was simply decorated, two additional bookshelves lining the walls. One was full of what Jasper suspected were personal favorites because she had two floor to ceiling bookshelves in her office that were full. The other held what looked to be shoe boxes, and on closer inspection he found they were filled with balls of yarn, some with half completed projects attached and a plastic hook sticking out of them. She had an ivory rug laid down on the floor, and a bedspread of ivory and pale blue with pillows to match. There were a string of lights framing the window and several hanging plants in the corners. The room just felt like her.

Bella popped a few bags of popcorn and they had a mini Mel Brooks marathon, watching _Spaceballs_, _History of the World Part I_, _The Producers_ (with Matthew Broderick and Nathan Lane), and wrapping everything up with _Robin Hood: Men in Tights_. It made for a light hearted evening, though Jasper was still troubled by Edward's distance as the night drew on. After the last movie, Emmett and Jasper made their way back to their dorm in a comfortable silence, Jasper lost in his thoughts.

"Hey, Jas," Emmett stopped him before Jasper could unlock his door. "It's normal for him to go through some pretty rough mood swings. It's more than likely nothing you've done, so don't let it get to you, alright?"

Jasper nodded. "Yeah, I know. Still…"

"I know, man," Emmett said, sympathizing. "He'll come out of it if you give him the space. I know it can be rough, but you've got to let him sort himself out or he goes to ground completely and he won't be seen for days."

Jasper sighed and combed his fingers through his hair. "Thanks."

"No probs." Emmett clapped him on the shoulder and continued the few feet down to his own door and disappeared inside.

Jasper let himself in his room and stood in the dark after the door closed behind him. He willed himself to relax, taking a deep breath and letting it out slowly through his nose as he tried to focus. He knew there was truth to Emmett's words; he'd seen enough of Edward over the past month of their friendship and growing relationship to know that Edward had a habit of withdrawing into himself when he was troubled.

Taking Emmett's words to heart, Jasper left his computer where it sat on his table rather than sending Edward an email, and got himself ready for bed. It took a long time for Jasper to fall asleep, and he was awake again within a couple of hours, his troubled thoughts not letting him find peace.

The week passed fairly quickly, though Jasper noted that he was beginning to slip into some of his old patterns the longer Edward remained distant from the rest of the group. By the end of the week, Jasper had hardly slept more than a couple hours each night and didn't say much to anyone other than his students. His teaching didn't seem to suffer; he was able to rebound on the energy of his students and get through his classes each day with an enthusiasm that may have been borrowed, but his intentions were good. But if he wasn't in classes, he was withdrawn into himself to keep from bleeding his frustration, guilt, and anxiety into the others.

Thursday afternoon Jasper risked being late to his fourth class (the 6th years, only an hour after lunch) to run to the dining hall for a much needed cup of coffee. He just wanted to get through the next three classes, hold his office hours and try to get some sleep. Jasper didn't have much hope, really; it had become too difficult to stop the train of thoughts that was chasing itself around his brain whenever he tried to close his eyes.

His stomach burned with the thought of another cup of coffee on the little food he'd managed to eat on his lunch break, but he needed something to keep him going for another few hours.

"Hey," a familiar voice spoke from his elbow as Jasper filled a paper cup.

"Hey, Edward," Jasper greeted him. The other man looked tired, with dark smudges under his eyes and his hair hanging limply in his face. "How are you?"

"Been better," Edward answered wryly. "I know you've got a class, so I won't keep you," he said, his right hand coming up to comb through his hair. "But I wanted to apologize for being a dick this week, and make sure we were still on for tomorrow."

"No apology necessary," Jasper said with a small smile. He appreciated the thought, nonetheless. "And yes, I've been looking forward to it." He had been, too. The prospect of their date was one of the bright spots that had kept Jasper moving forward throughout the week.

Edward's whole face seemed to brighten with that comment and again Jasper wondered about this man how something so small could make him feel so much better. Someone had hurt him, badly, Jasper decided.

"Me too," Edward said. "But, try not to get so flustered this time, alright?" he teased. "We can't have your students thinking you're a flake."

Jasper's smile blossomed a bit at seeing his friend come back, even just a little. He mocked a salute. "Yes, sir." He picked up his coffee and headed toward the cashier. "It's good to see you, Edward."

Edward just nodded and smiled back, turning around to grab his own coffee.

Jasper made it back to his room in time to start class right on the nose. He nursed his coffee throughout class, several of his students doing the same. The students were discussing the first of the novels he'd assigned (The Killer Angels) in small groups and he mostly let them be, though he circled the room occasionally to make sure they were keeping on task while he focused on staying awake.

It figured; his body fought sleep all week and as soon as he'd gotten a bit of reassurance, allowing the train of his thoughts to finally to slow down, he was ready to crash. Jasper only hoped that when he did finally make it back to his room to sleep, his body would comply.

He muddled through the next two classes, thankful he hadn't prepped a lecture for either class. The 7th years he turned loose to work on their research projects and the 2nd years got a study hour for the exam he had planned for the next day. His students seemed to be oddly understanding of his plight and only asked relevant, thoughtful questions.

Bella was in the office when he dragged himself up the stairs.

"Jasper, you look exhausted," she said calmly as he flopped into the chair behind his desk. He tilted his head back and stared at the ceiling.

"Yeah," he said hoarsely. "I haven't been sleeping much this week." She was far too observant to have not noticed anything before. That thought made him wonder just how horrible he looked if she was finally deciding to say something.

She slid from her chair and crossed the room, perching on the edge of Jasper's desk. He sighed happily when she combed her fingers through his hair, pressing her wrist to his forehead briefly. "You okay?"

"Just too much going on in my head, I guess," he drawled, trying to pass it off. He had to be exhausted if he thought she was going to buy that.

"Edward will come around. You just have to give him time. Meantime, you cancel your office hours tonight and head home. You don't want to fall asleep on your big date tomorrow night, do you?" she teased lightly.

Jasper had to reach up and stop her hand from combing through his hair again; he was too close to falling asleep as it was. "That feels great darlin', but you keep it up, I'm gonna pass out right here." He could hear his accent growing thicker by the minute.

She giggled softly. "Go home, Jas."

With a sigh, he hefted himself back up, leaving his bag where it lay on the floor near his desk. If he wanted to do work later, he'd come back for it. Before he left, Bella gave him a hug. "I'll bring something by for dinner."

"Don't worry 'bout me, Bells. There's food 'n the cupboards." He yawned so hard his jaw popped.

"Don't argue with me, Whitlock," she threatened.

"Yes, ma'am." He hugged her back and staggered off to bed, knowing he must appear drunk to whomever he passed on his way. He made it to his room and managed to get his shoes off before he collapsed on top of the covers and remained in oblivion for twelve solid hours.

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Okay, okay, before I get lynched, the date is next, I swear! Also, we'll learn a bit more about Edward's past next chapter.

I know I give previews in review replies (and you guys are awesome for leaving fantastic reviews!) but there's another (different) peek at the blog each week. There's a link on my profile.


	10. Chapter 9: The Date

Thanks as always to my betas, Naelany and wishingforlove.

Here's the date (and some of the backstory) you've all been waiting for. I hope you're not disappointed.

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Edward knew he was an ass, but he was feeling it fairly acutely at dinner Thursday night. Sunday he'd found himself in a low mood, and he figured it was the events of Friday and the emotional rollercoaster that had followed catching up with him. Edward had gone to dinner but had remained largely within his own head, trying to sort everything out and not lash out at anyone in his tetchiness.

He found himself struggling to reconcile his burgeoning feelings for Jasper with his more established feelings for Bella. Edward cared a great deal for Bella, and though he'd initially just tried to hook up with her, he found himself growing to truly love her as a member of his family. Hell, he knew he'd still sleep with her in a heartbeat, if given the chance, and he was having problems making that work with what he had developing more slowly with Jasper.

Throughout the week he isolated himself while he was trying to figure out what he wanted. He couldn't deny that he was attracted to both of them, but Bella had made it clear that she wasn't interested in a relationship with Edward when they met. When she'd found James, Edward was happy for her, knowing that she'd have someone else in her life besides his family. He'd also grown jealous over time and struggled to deal with that, trying to convince himself he was content to have her as a close friend. Then Jasper had arrived and shaken everything up.

Jasper was a lot like Bella in some ways. He was quiet and observant and had worked his way into their lives with very little effort. Edward also thought he was absolutely gorgeous with that mop of dirty blonde hair, sparkling blue eyes and that soft Texan twang that was muted unless he was upset or tired. Edward also just felt drawn to the man; he was a comfortable companion and Edward felt like he didn't have to work too hard when he was with him. It was like Jasper understood Edward before they'd even really gotten to know each other.

So while he was trying to process that the two people who had become as dear to him as his family had been put in danger by Bella's ex-boyfriend (he hoped, at least, that he was her ex) he'd withdrawn into himself and lived up to his high school nick name of Sullen Cullen. He managed to get through his classes, and his piano students hadn't minded that he'd been slightly distracted, since it allowed them to slack off a bit. By Thursday, however, he'd mostly pulled himself out of the funk by deciding to just see where things with Jasper led, and that he would be more than happy with Bella as a close friend.

When he ran into Jasper in the cafeteria, he realized that even though his family and Bella were somewhat used to his odd mood swings (that he had to admit had gotten worse in the last few years), Jasper wasn't and Edward instantly felt guilty for the dark shadows beneath Jasper's haunted blue eyes. He apologized for his behavior and was relieved to hear that Jasper was still interested in going out with him.

Edward wasn't sure why he was so relieved. Part of him was sure that Jasper wasn't going to want to have anything to do with him after his distance for the past week. But the rest of him knew that Jasper understood him better than Edward had anticipated.

However, when Jasper didn't appear for dinner, Edward truly felt like an ass. "Where's Jasper?" He asked Bella when she joined them.

"I sent him home to get some sleep. He was exhausted," Bella explained, dropping a teabag into a steaming mug before starting to eat her pasta.

"Did something happen this week?" Edward frowned into his own dinner, something that was supposed to be beef stroganoff over noodles.

Bella shook her head. "I just don't think he was sleeping well. He's worrying a lot."

"Do you know what about?" Edward wasn't sure he wanted to hear the answer.

"Me," she said honestly with a small smile. "You. James. Classes." She shrugged. "I get the sense that he's one of those people that's naturally a care taker. He just seems to know things about people and carries a lot of responsibility for others' well being on his shoulders."

Edward had noticed that about him too, especially when he'd gone shopping with Alice that first weekend, somehow just knowing that she needed company and didn't protest. He'd somehow found a way to connect with everyone in his family in a way that they'd needed fulfilled. But hell if it didn't make him feel guilty that the man had been worried about him because he'd been too busy dealing with what was in his head to let everyone know that he was alright and just being his moody self.

"Shit," he swore softly.

"Hey," Bella said, laying her hand gently on his arm. "Don't worry about it too much, kay? He's not upset with you, he was just worried because he hadn't heard from you much this week, and he's used to seeing you. Just try to explain to him tomorrow night, okay?" She smiled softly and gave his forearm a squeeze. "If you really want this, he deserves the truth."

Edward nodded, his guilt not assuaged. "I don't mean to pull away, you know," he said quietly.

"We know, Edward," Bella assured him with a smile. "It's just the way you deal with things."

He returned the smile, though he knew it didn't reach his eyes. He kissed her cheek lightly and turned his attention to his dinner, drifting back to his thoughts. The others carried on around him, Bella occasionally nudging him when someone spoke to him and he didn't catch it.

Fridays were one of Edward's easiest days. He didn't have any lesson students or rehearsals to attend to, just his three classes. He was done for the day after the Music Appreciation class fourth period. It was only 1:30 and he wasn't meeting the others for dinner until their usual 5:30 when everyone else was finished for the afternoon (except Alice who didn't have a 7th period class). He was more anxious for his date with Jasper than he liked, so he decided to work off some of the nervous energy. After a quick change in his room, he went to the gym and lost himself in the rhythm of swimming until his body was pleasantly tired and his mind had settled down. Being in the water was freeing for Edward; while he was swimming he didn't have to constantly think about his balance or how much weaker his right leg was.

His swim killed an hour, and rather than shower at the gym, he tugged his sweats and hoodie on over his damp swim trunks and hobbled back to his room. Edward took a long hot shower, washing the scent of chlorine from his body and hair. He took his time shaving, but even after lingering, it was still two hours before dinner.

Feeling mellow from the exercise and relaxed from the shower, Edward lounged on his bed in only his boxers and a t-shirt, his iPod churning out jazz standards while he allowed himself to doze lightly. His thoughts drifted to what he had planned for the evening.

The aquarium in Port Angeles was open until nine on Friday and Saturday nights, and Edward had gotten tickets for one of the later tours. He also had another favorite hole in the wall cafe he wanted to take Jasper to. They had great local musicians performing on the weekends, and served killer deserts. It was a fairly casual plan for the evening and Edward just hoped he didn't fuck anything up.

He glanced at the clock to see he'd been drifting in la la land for over an hour. He dressed in a pair of loose fitting designer jeans that Alice had bought him and a light-weight forest green sweater that fit pretty tightly. A pair of waterproof boots (stylish, yet essential) finished off the ensemble and Edward spent a few minutes trying to tame his hair, but gave up. Before he left he made sure he had his car keys and his wallet, shrugged on his leather jacket, and made his way to the cafeteria.

"Looking sharp, cousin," Alice said with a bright smile when she met him at the door. "Shall we, or are you waiting for Jas?"

Edward grinned down at her. "I'm waiting."

Alice bounced on her toes but managed to contain her squeal of excitement. "You're still eating with us though, right?"

"Yes, Alice," Edward said patiently.

"Okay!" she bounced away, leaving Edward to lean against the wall and wait.

He wasn't waiting for long before Jasper appeared, wearing jeans that accentuated his long legs and a cream colored sweater with a v neck under a trench coat, but what brought Edward up short were the cowboy boots. He was used to seeing Jasper in loafers or his trainers, and it shouldn't have surprised him that Jasper owned a pair of boots.

"Hi," Jasper greeted Edward with a grin.

"Hey." Edward smiled. Jasper looked much more rested than he had the previous day, and Edward felt a bit of the guilt he'd been carrying lift from his shoulders. "Hungry?"

"Yeah, starved," Jasper answered. "I missed dinner last night and haven't seemed to catch up today."

"Well, we could always blow this joint and go somewhere with real food," Edward suggested. He knew the dining hall was one of the highest ranked in the nation, but that didn't mean they weren't all sick of the food sometimes.

Jasper seemed to consider that for a moment. "Sure," he said with a nod. "Let's get out of here."

"Alright." Edward dug his phone from his pocket and quickly texted Alice as they set off toward the parking lot. She'd forgive them. Eventually. "So, uhm," Edward started. "I wanted to apologize again for this week. I should have let you know that I was okay."

Jasper waved him off. "It's alright, really. I can't promise I won't do the same thing. As much as I was concerned with everything that happened last week, I can understand the need for space to deal with things."

"I still think that I owe you an explanation," Edward said, tucking the phone away after retrieving Alice's message acknowledging their absence.

"You don't," Jasper said gently. "But I won't stop you," he said with a smile.

Edward returned the smile as he lit up a smoke, offering one to Jasper who declined. "Before the accident," he said as they walked, "I was a bit of a playboy. I was never caught up in any scandal or anything like that," he said in a rush, not wanting Jasper to get the wrong idea. "I just saw a lot of different people. I could be in three different cities in a week when the orchestra was touring, and I never lacked for companionship when I wanted it, both from inside the orchestra and from fans."

He took a long draw of his cigarette. "My partners always knew I was never into anything serious, and I was never a – what's the current term – a player?" he asked with a smirk. "Anyway. We mostly left on good terms, since I was always pretty up front with what I was in for when I hooked up with anyone. Even back then I was a moody bastard, but I can admit that the mood swings have become more pronounced in the last few years. I used to get teased in high school for being the tortured artist type. I was popular, but preferred to be alone while I wrote music or was practicing. When I went to college I came out of my shell a bit when some of my classmates showed me there was more to a university experience than a practice room and studying for exams. I never did quite grow out of the habit of going to ground when things got rough."

Edward used the fob to unlock the Volvo and he and Jasper slid into the car. "I was on my way home from a rehearsal when I was struck by another car. Carlisle said the person who hit me was intoxicated and on their cell phone when they sped through a red light. I don't remember much about that day." Edward was vaguely aware that he was rambling. He glanced at Jasper, who was watching him with a patient and open expression. He stubbed his butt out in the ashtray and cracked his window slightly.

"I was in the hospital for three months after the surgery before I could go home, and spent the next nine months in physical therapy. I was living with my parents and there wasn't much I could do to take care of myself. It became all too easy to withdraw into myself and throw one large pity party." He recalled talking to Jasper about this before, a little bit. "I felt useless; I was broken and felt like less of a person because I had to be looked after like a toddler all over again. I swung back and forth between being cruel to Esme to not speaking to her for long periods of time. I don't know how she put up with me, other than the fact that I was her son, and every so often we had a good day. We went through four in-home care givers in three months."

Edward glanced at Jasper again. His blue eyes shone with sympathy.

"Esme was always careful to never show any reaction to anything I said or did. On some level I'm sure I knew I was hurting her, but it meant less to me than my own suffering at the time. One night I heard her sobbing in the kitchen as she talked to Carlisle when they thought I was asleep. She was heartbroken over the things I'd said to her earlier in the day and over the course of the week. Her patience had worn out and she was breaking down under the abuse I heaped on her. My mother has always been the strongest person that I'd ever known, and the revelation that I was managing to break her spirits single handedly shook me to the core. I knew that I wouldn't be able to maintain an even temper for long; even before the accident I had a quick temper if someone sparked it. So instead I withdrew. If I wasn't having a good day, I tended to shut down so that I wasn't hurting anyone.

"Of course the silence hurt as much as the yelling, but it was better. It took me a long time to figure out that it was okay to ask for help, that my family wouldn't think anything less of me. I still have issues of inferiority, feeling like less of a person because of the lingering disabilities from the crash, but I'm getting better. So it's pretty ingrained in me to hide myself away when there's too much going on for me to handle. It keeps me from hurting people unintentionally, though I know it's not really a conscious or logical decision."

Edward stopped talking and took a deep breath, processing everything he'd just said. He hadn't attempted to explain any of that to anyone since Bella, two years ago.

"Edward," Jasper said quietly. "You went through something incredibly traumatic that ended your career before you really had a chance to get started. I can't defend your behavior, but I can understand where you were coming from. You didn't owe me an explanation, but I appreciate you trusting me enough to tell me that, and now I understand a bit better why everyone was telling me just to give you some space this week and you'd come around."

Edward flashed Jasper a smile, relieved that he'd understood the point of Edward's rambling tale.

"What had you hiding from everyone this week?" Jasper asked gently. "I mean, if you want to talk about it now…"

"It wasn't anything in particular," Edward said quickly before Jasper could panic too much about broaching the topic. "I think it was just me needing to cope with what happened on Friday, and the stress of the semester. Sunday I got up feeling pretty bitchy and everything was irritating, which is generally a sign that I need to keep myself away from people to keep from snapping."

Jasper nodded. "I know how that goes," he said.

"So…yeah," Edward said into the awkward pause that rose. "I didn't mean to avoid you. Or anyone," he said hastily.

Jasper laughed quietly. "I missed you too, Edward," he whispered into the dark.

Edward thought his smile might split his face wide open. "How was your week?" he asked, glancing over at Jasper.

"Ah," Jasper breathed, and Edward snuck another look at the blonde. "Not great, but I managed," Jasper answered. "I have trouble sleeping and that's reared its head this week. It kind of turned me into a wreck."

"You looked pretty rough yesterday," Edward observed.

"I only had a couple hours sleep each night since Friday," Jasper explained. "Coffee was pretty much the only thing keeping me going and I was out of my stash in the office."

"And Bella and caffeine don't mix," Edward said, his tone teasing. That explained why Jasper had been dashing to the dining hall between classes.

"Is that why she usually drinks tea?"

Edward nodded. "One cup of coffee keeps her fueled for days. Even caffeinated pop can get her pretty efficiently buzzed. It's not really funny, especially when she crashes, but she can run rings around Alice."

Jasper chuckled. "That'd be something to see."

"It's actually a bit scary," Edward said. "You'll probably see it around finals."

"I'll make sure I sound the alarm if I see anything," Jasper teased.

"Good. I want to know when I need to go hide at Mom and Dad's." Edward smiled. "Do you have plans for the mid-semester holiday?"

Jasper shook his head. "Not really. When is it?"

"Two weeks," Edward answered, navigating toward the right lane for the exit into Port Angles. "Alice usually plans something for us."

Jasper nodded. "I'll probably volunteer to stay back on dorm duty, since I don't have anyone to go visit or anything."

"You should come with us," Edward blurted out before he could stop himself. "I mean, you're practically a member of the family since Esme adopted you and Alice won't take no for an answer." He mentally kicked himself. Idiot.

"You don't even know what the plan is," Jasper protested, but Edward had the feeling it was half hearted.

"As soon as I weasel it out of her, I'll let you know," Edward promised. He pulled into a parking lot in front of a rundown looking building.

"What is it with you and hole in the wall places to eat?" Jasper asked, amused as Edward shut off the car.

Edward shrugged, grinning. "They have the best food."

Jasper didn't look quite convinced as the hostess led them to a booth near the back. "What do you recommend here?" He asked as they pulled menus from between the napkin dispenser and salt and pepper shakers.

"I was going to bring us here for dessert," Edward said. "They have live music starting in a couple hours, and the best brownie sundaes."

Jasper grinned at him over his menu. "You've got to have the biggest sweet tooth of anyone I know."

Edward shrugged and smiled.

"You should do that more," Jasper said quietly. "Smile," he continued when Edward looked at him, confused. "It lights up your whole face," he said shyly.

Edward felt his ears go red. He'd been complimented on his looks more times than he could count, but hearing it from Jasper made him feel self conscious.

"I'm sorry," Jasper said quickly. "I didn't mean to embarrass you."

"You didn't," Edward assured him. "I just haven't had anyone say anything like that to me in a while."

"Really?" Jasper looked like he didn't believe that for a minute.

"That whole withdrawal thing we were talking about?" Edward said. "I didn't leave the house for months unless it was to go to therapy or a doctor's appointment." He looked down at his menu. "I haven't been in any type of relationship in three years," he admitted. "I didn't want pity dates and I couldn't deal with being rejected back then, so I've just kept myself out of the way of people who aren't friends or family."

Jasper looked at him sympathetically. "Edward, even if this, whatever this is," he said with a wave of his hand "between us doesn't work, I'm not going anywhere. Anyone who can't or couldn't see beyond your physical limitations isn't worthy of your time anyway."

Edward's family had been telling him the same thing for three years, but his insecurities wouldn't allow him to believe them. Even coming from Jasper, he had a hard time accepting it as truth, but like everything else in the past several years he was still working on it. "Thank you," he said quietly.

"What can I get you boys?" The waitress interrupted before Jasper could respond.

"I'll have an iced tea," Jasper answered.

"Just water for me," Edward told her.

"Be right back," she said with a nod.

Edward held onto the question on the tip of his tongue – what Jasper wanted 'this' to be. He'd rather not have the waitress reappear in the middle of the conversation, so he occupied himself with studying the menu for a moment, though he knew what he was going to have.

"What do you recommend?" Jasper asked.

"I'm having the chicken and dumplings," Edward answered, putting his menu back in its place.

"Hm," Jasper mused, considering the options as the waitress came back with their drinks.

Edward relayed his order, along with a green salad, dressing on the side. Jasper finally decided on the meatloaf with buttermilk smashed potatoes. When the waitress left again, Edward found himself fiddling with one of the straws she'd dropped on the table between their glasses. He was strangely and suddenly anxious.

Jasper's fingers settled lightly on top of Edward's, stilling his movements. "What's wrong?"

"Nothing," Edward said quickly. Too quickly.

Jasper smirked. "You can't lie to me, Edward," he said gently. "But you can talk to me. What's got you so anxious all of a sudden?" He didn't move his hand, and Edward was grateful for the grounding touch. There was a current running between them, and Edward had noticed it before, when they'd held hands the previous week. Edward felt both calmed and excited at the contact, and he wasn't sure what to make of it.

"What is _this_ between us?" Edward asked, meeting Jasper's blue eyes. "There's just something about you that makes me feel like I've known you for a lot longer than I really have."

Jasper nodded. "I've felt that, too. I think we've had enough similar hurts to see parts of ourselves in each other. But I think the question is what do we _want_ it to be?" he paused, toying with his iced tea with the hand that wasn't still holding Edward's. "I like you, Edward," Jasper admitted quietly with a soft smile. "I'd like to see where _this_ goes. Like I said, I haven't been with anyone in a long time, and I can't promise to not pull a disappearing act on you if I get freaked out. I have trust issues and I'm not always a pleasant person to be around. But somehow, when I'm around you, I'm much more centered, able to let my guard down. I can't explain it, but it's there."

Edward turned his hand quickly and gave Jasper's fingers a squeeze. "We'll figure things out together, then," he promised. He couldn't say he was any less anxious, but at least he knew where they stood with each other. The attraction between them was clearly double sided, and he felt better knowing that they were on the same page.

"Okay," Jasper said with a nod.

"Okay." Edward returned the grin and reclaimed his hand as the waitress approached with Edward's salad. He picked off the tomatoes and speared lettuce on his fork, dipping carefully into the little dish of dressing. "What?" he asked, looking at Jasper's amused expression.

"Why is it that the only place you _don't_ eat salad like that is at home?" He asked, resting his elbow on the table, chin in his palm.

"Esme makes the best dressing," Edward said like that explained everything.

Jasper shook his head and it was plain that he didn't understand. "That really doesn't make any sense, but okay."

Edward laughed at Jasper's confusion. "I don't like to eat salad plain, but I don't like dressing enough to drench my salad in it, unless it's Esme's. So if it's not Esme's, I dip, so I don't get too much."

He watched as Jasper's jaw clenched, obviously trying to hold back his laughter. "You can laugh," Edward said, chuckling. "I know it's ridiculous, but I've been doing it too long to stop."

Jasper laughed quietly. "Any other strange tendencies I should know about?" he teased.

"Like what?"

"I don't know. Like…" Jasper thought for a moment. "How is your music collection organized?"

"Artist, album, year," Edward rattled off easily. "Though since I mostly have digital music files these days, it doesn't matter so much."

"Okay, that sounds fairly normal." Jasper drew his finger through the condensation on his glass. "Do you have to put the toilet paper on a certain way?"

Edward nearly choked on his laughter. "No."

Jasper chuckled. "Alright. Then I think we can assume that your only super strange tendency is that you eat salad in a very weird way."

Edward threw one of his discarded cherry tomatoes at Jasper, who caught it and ate it. Edward made a face.

"And that you don't like tomatoes," Jasper teased.

"They're squishy," Edward protested. "And runny, with a weird texture."

"Do you eat ketchup?" Jasper reached across the table and took the remaining two tomatoes from the edge of Edward's plate.

"Of course. Not on eggs, though," he clarified.

"Good, cause that's nasty. But ketchup is tomatoes," Jasper pointed out.

"Yes, but not raw tomatoes."

Jasper shook his head again, laughing. "You're a strange one, Edward Cullen."

Edward grinned and nodded. "So I've heard." He finished his salad and pushed the plate away. "How about you? Strange tendencies?"

"Well, you know, other than the sacrificing of chickens every full moon..."

Edward laughed. "Right."

Jasper smirked. "Other than frequent bouts of insomnia and a freakishly mild craving for sweets as compared to you and your brother, I think there's nothing too strange."

"Hey, quit picking on me," Edward said as the waitress came by with their entrees.

"Anything else for you two?" She asked.

"Not yet, but I'm sure we'll be wanting dessert," Jasper drawled, smirking at Edward.

"Enjoy your supper boys," she said on a laugh, and they thanked her.

They made more random small talk as they ate, talking about music and books. Edward enjoyed his chicken and dumplings, something he didn't get very often since he'd quit living at home. Emmett never really liked it anyway, so it'd been one of Edward's special occasion foods.

When they'd finished, the waitress came back around and topped off Edward's water and Jasper's tea. "Dessert?"

Edward looked to Jasper. "Now, or would you like to come back later?"

"Either," Jasper answered.

"I think we'll come back," Edward told their server. "We had intended to come by for dessert and music, so I think we'll do just that."

"Alrighty. See you boys later." She dropped the check on the table.

Edward fished out his wallet and left a few bills on the table. "Ready?"

Jasper nodded and slid out of the booth and walked a pace behind Edward, his warm hand against Edward's back under his leather jacket. "So," Jasper said lowly near Edward's ear. "If we're not dancing, what are we doing this evening?"

"I couldn't find a planetarium in driving distance, so I was forced to get creative."

Jasper's chuckle was warm against Edward's neck. "How so?"

"There's an aquarium that does late evening tours on Friday and Saturday nights," Edward explained, unlocking the car.

"Hm," Jasper said, sliding into his seat. "That was pretty creative."

The drive to the aquarium was short, and they were soon gathered with a small group, mostly couples around Edward and Jasper's ages. To set the mood, the lights in the building had been lowered and the exhibits had been lit with warm colors to accentuate the evening theme. Not usually one for overt pda, Edward was relieved when Jasper initiated contact between them, either snaking his hand under the hem of Edward's sweater to rest at the small of his back, or taking his right hand for short periods of time. They lingered toward the back of the tour group so Edward didn't feel like he was holding anyone up.

The tour took an hour and a half and Edward and Jasper were in physical contact for most of it. Edward wouldn't have had it any other way. They both enjoyed the stroll through the exhibits, though Edward thought Jasper was having a better time than he let on. Interest was written across his features every time they stopped in front of a new tank and he was listening fairly intently to the tour guide's information. Especially in comparison to some of the couples around them who had taken advantage of the dark corners. Edward was pleased that he'd made the right choice and that Jasper was enjoying himself.

Jasper insisted on visiting the gift shop before they left and Edward watched, amused, as he shopped. He picked out a couple of postcards, explaining to Edward that he'd gotten in the habit when he was in the service because they travelled more easily than shot glasses. Jasper had also picked up a small fuzzy penguin plush toy for Bella, and a paint by numbers set for Alice.

"I'm glad you enjoyed yourself," Edward said as they walked back to the car.

Jasper smiled at him. "I really did. I like doing stuff like this. Museums, aquariums, planetariums." The last was said in a teasing tone before he paused, a hand on Edward's arm making him stop as well. When Edward stopped and looked back at Jasper, Jasper closed the distance between them and kissed him softly.

Edward responded, shifting his weight slightly to his left leg and into Jasper. "You have a thing for dark places you want to tell me about?" He said softly after the kiss ended.

Jasper laughed quietly. "Yeah."

Edward kissed him again lightly and they resumed walking back to his car. "Ready for dessert now?"

Jasper smiled.

* * *

So, was it good for you? ;0)

I'll resume the regular posting schedule again on Thursday.


	11. Chapter 10: MidSemester part 1

A/N: Thanks you guys for all your continued support of this story. Your comments about the date were fantastic; I was really nervous about that chapter and I'm glad everyone seemed very satisfied with it.

Final round of voting for the Indies is open now. Please support your favorite stories (even if it's not mine!) by voting.

As always, Naelany and wishingforlove catch my typos and dropped words.

And finally, this whole chapter is a bunch of h/c fluff, which is one of my guilty pleasures. Not a lot of plot development here, but some character development and some cuddling. :D

* * *

The dining hall was abuzz with excitement on Monday morning. Despite midterms being given in just about every class sometime during the week, it was a short week, the campus' Mid-Semester Holiday coming up on Friday and the following Monday. Everyone was excited by the four day weekend and the chance to get out of town to see family or take a mini vacation.

Alice had been planning a get away for the group, a short trip across the Strait of Juan de Fuca from Port Angeles to Victoria, British Columbia, where they'd stay for three days and nights, returning on Monday. Jasper had to admit he was looking forward to the trip, once he found out about it. Esme had gushed about visiting Butchart Gardens in the fall, and Emmett had been busy doing some research about local night life. Jasper was just looking forward to getting off campus for a few days. He loved the school, but he'd found that living and working in the same space was isolating and he didn't really want to get trapped inside a bubble. Edward had convinced him that he needed to go with the family, that just because he was new he didn't need to stay behind and sacrifice his holiday for the other faculty.

It had been two weeks since their first official date, to the aquarium in Port Angeles. When they'd gone to the Cullen's for dinner the following evening and had been much more casual with the physical contact between them, Jasper was pretty sure that glass had cracked around the neighborhood from Alice's happy shriek. Apparently they'd been forgiven for running out on them for dinner. Of course, the joke gift of the paint by number set had helped as well.

The following week they'd gone out as a group, Alice's girlfriend unable to make it, so at least Bella didn't feel like a fifth (or seventh) wheel. They were all still keeping their eyes open for James, but there hadn't been any sign of him since that afternoon three weeks previous. They went bowling and Jasper witnessed just how competitive Rosalie, Emmett, Alice, and Edward could be. Jasper mostly sat back with Bella and mocked how seriously the others were taking the competition.

Jasper and Edward had both been on call the following weekend, so they hadn't left campus except for dinner with everyone on Saturday. They could have gone off campus, so long as they'd had their pagers for emergencies, but neither of them was really comfortable with being away in case of a serious emergency, so they'd spent Friday evening in Edward's room, watching movies.

He was content with the pace their relationship was developing, physically and emotionally. Jasper was beginning to figure out Edward's mood swings, though there hadn't been anything as severe as the week after the incident with James. They hadn't gone much further than kissing and Jasper was okay with that, though more often than not after their morning workouts, Jasper had a whole different kind of workout in the shower. He was a healthy man, and Edward was gorgeous when he was flushed and sweaty from his workouts, and Jasper often couldn't help imagining Edward flushed and sweaty from other exertions.

However, that Monday morning, Jasper had woken feeling rather ragged, tired and with a sore throat, he thought from having breathed through his mouth all night or something. He'd dragged himself to the gym and met up with Emmett and Edward, his five mile jogging taking longer than usual so that he didn't bother working in the weight room, but stopped in to say good morning before heading back to his room and a hot shower.

Autumn, and thus rain, had fully settled on Forks by mid-October. Jasper jogged through the drizzle to get back to his dorm. He took his shower and dressed in grey slacks, a black, long sleeved button up, and a grey wool sweater. He tugged on his loafers and threw extra socks in his bag in case his feet got soaked on any of his ventures outside. Jasper could handle a lot of things, but there was no sense walking around in damp squishy socks if he didn't have to.

Hot tea to soothe his throat joined oatmeal, toast and jam, and a banana on Jasper's breakfast tray, and he found Alice and Bella seated at their usual table in the dining hall.

"Good morning, Jasper," Alice greeted him as he took a seat, only looking up from her stack of papers long enough to confirm that's who she was talking to.

"Mornin' ladies," Jasper said after clearing his throat, hearing the tired rasp and slightly heavier twang in his voice.

"Hi Jasper," Bella said with a small smile that faded as she took him in. "Are you okay?"

He nodded. "Just slept funny or something," he assured her with a small smile that wasn't reaching his eyes.

She made a sound like she didn't believe him, but she let it go. Jasper ate his breakfast quietly, relieved that no one was trying to talk too much as Alice finished grading papers and Bella appeared to be working on something for class, eyes focused on her laptop. He just wasn't in the mood to make conversation, and he clamped down on the feelings, withdrawing a little into himself.

Jasper wondered if Edward had noticed the subdued mood of the table when he joined them, murmuring his good mornings as he took the empty seat between Bella and Jasper. Edward didn't break the quiet that had fallen over them as he ate.

Alice looked up eventually, looking around the table, confused. "Where's Em and Rose?"

"Rosalie isn't feeling well, and Emmett went to look after her before classes," Edward explained, finishing his coffee. "The crud's going 'round."

Jasper was familiar with the general term. Respiratory viruses tended to run rampant in schools like Forks Academy, where everyone lived, ate, and studied within an enclosed atmosphere. Every school he'd taught at had some kind of 'campus crud' that went around each fall and spring. It usually took a few weeks for the bug to make the rounds and not many went untouched.

Alice nodded. "I've been taking extra vitamin C for a couple weeks now. My students don't seem to understand the concept of not coming to class when they're sick."

Bella laughed softly. "They love you, Alice, and don't want to miss classes."

Edward snorted, like he was trying to smother a laugh, and Jasper smiled.

"Yeah, I'm sure that's it," Alice said dryly. "Not that it matters anyway. Everyone's in such close contact with the dorm living that they may as well just come to class so long as they can stay awake."

They all laughed softly and soon they were going their separate ways for classes.

Jasper was grateful that he and Bella kept an electric kettle going most of the day since the weather had turned decidedly to autumn. He alternated between coffee and tea throughout the day, trying to keep warm liquid going down his throat to keep his voice in tact as he finished his last day of lecture before his classes began reviewing for their midterm, which he had planned for Thursday. Despite his best efforts, however, by the end of the day he was hoarse and exhausted, and admitted defeat. He couldn't deny that he was under the weather anymore, feeling completely like shit warmed over.

Not hungry, Jasper returned to his room instead of going to dinner, changed into sweats and a t-shirt and crawled into bed. Before he slipped into sleep, he sent Edward a quick text, explaining his absence for the meal and promising to see him in the morning.

He woke a few hours later to quiet humming and the sounds of someone moving around his space.

"Go back to sleep," Bella's soft voice spoke when he stirred and sat up. "I brought you dinner, in case you were hungry later. And I wanted to check on you."

"'M okay," he rasped. "Just need to sleep this off."

Bella laughed softly. "At least you're not a big baby about it," she teased. "There's a sandwich and soup in the kitchen. Just pop the bowl in the microwave for a few minutes." She kissed his temple. "Feel better."

"Thanks, darlin'," he drawled, sliding back under the covers, already half asleep as he felt an additional weight laid over the bed and heard the quiet click of the door.

His dreams were strange and oddly vivid. Normally Jasper dreamed in muted colors, at least what he remembered of his dreams. However, everything that night was harsh and overbright and nonsensical, so it was unsurprising when he woke just after midnight with a throbbing sinus headache and the feeling that someone had poured cement into his head. His sore throat had bloomed into a full fledged case of the crud while he'd slept.

Feeling like he'd been run over by a truck, Jasper forced himself out of bed to find his bottle of painkillers. They'd take the edge off the headache enough for him to get more sleep until he could get to the drug store for decongestant. He didn't recognize the blanket on his bed after he turned on the light and fumbled with his cell phone to leave a message for Esme. He informed her he wasn't feeling well and requested a sub for Tuesday and Wednesdays classes. From his experience, Jasper knew he'd be miserable for a couple days, and then be ready to get back to work. Fortunately, he'd left his review materials in the office, so the sub would be able to manage through the lessons, and he could give the exams on Thursday.

He stumbled into the shared space between his and Emmett's room and scrawled a note on Emmett's board, telling him not to expect him for the gym, filled his coffee mug with water and trudged back into his room and fell back into bed after taking three liquid gel ibuprofen capsules.

He slept restlessly throughout the night, waking every so often as he shifted, trying to find a comfortable position. He woke completely, his alarm clock reading just after 7 am. He sat up slowly and peered blearily at a pile of items on this table that hadn't been there before. He sneezed into his elbow, lacking tissues or a handkerchief at hand, and groaned as the pressure behind his eyes and cheekbones increased. Jasper pulled himself up and staggered to the bathroom, then returned to see what had been left. A box of cold and sinus medication, a large thermos, a bag of throat lozenges with vitamin C and Echinacea and zinc, and a note joined a large box of Kleenex.

_Jasper,_

_Now, I know you'd tell me you're a grown man and quite capable of looking after yourself, but you can't deny that sometimes a boy just needs his mama to take care of him. There's chicken soup in the fridge, the thermos is honey lemon tea, and there's more lemons and honey in the kitchen. _

_Your classes are covered through Wednesday. Feel better, and call if you need anything._

_-Esme_

Jasper chuckled, a tired raspy sound. It seemed like such an Esme thing to do, and at least he didn't have to wonder too much about how someone got into his room, or getting himself to the drugstore. He fumbled with the box of cold medicine but eventually succeeded in getting the box open and took two pills. He finished the stale water in his coffee mug and decided to shower before the cold pills knocked him out.

He lingered under the hot water, letting the heat and steam open his sinuses a bit. Back in his room his dressed quickly in clean sweats, a t-shirt and a hoodie, and pulled on a pair of heavy socks. He filled his empty mug with the hot tea, sighing as the heat of the liquid soothed his still scratchy throat. Jasper pulled the box of tissues closer, and by the time he'd finished his tea, the drugs had kicked in, and he dozed off again, curling up beneath his covers.

He woke again after a couple hours and knew he'd not likely get back to sleep after having been out more or less since 7 the previous evening. His mouth dried out and gummy from breathing through it. "Ugh," he groaned thickly, coughing as sinus drainage poured down his throat when he sat up. He hated being sick.

"You look like hell," a quietly velvet voice spoke up.

Jasper looked up blearily to see Edward in the doorway to the kitchenette. "Yeah," he rasped. "Why are you here?" He hoped that didn't come across as insensitive as it sounded. He was still pretty out of it, thanks to the drugs, and he was pretty sure Edward had morning classes to attend to.

"Came to see if you needed anything," Edward said with a shrug, crossing the room with a mug in his free hand. He perched on the edge of the bed and handed Jasper the mug.

Jasper scooted as far back into the corner of the bed as he could, as he took the warm cup, noting the slightly hurt look on Edward's face. "You don't want this," he said quietly in his defense.

"I've already been exposed anyway," Edward said dismissively. "Paul had it last week, and half my students have been out the last two days. It's pretty much unavoidable at this point."He smirked. "Besides, moving six inches away is hardly going to help anything."

Jasper managed a tired laugh and nodded.

"Anyway, I brought you some DVDs, since I know you don't have any, and I thought you might be bored." Edward turned and shifted onto the bed so he ended up shoulder to shoulder with Jasper, leaning against the wall behind them.

Jasper leaned into Edward slightly, feeling Edward's long fingers slip under the hem of his tops and brush along his back. "Thanks."

They sat quietly for a few moments, Jasper drinking his tea. "Not that I'm not glad to see you," he said hoarsely. "But don't you have classes?"

Edward's fingers continued to work in slow lazy circles at the base of Jasper's spine and he found himself relaxing slightly. "Lessons are cancelled for mid-terms."

"Oh." He yawned hugely. "Sorry I'm not better company."

Edward laughed softly. "'Salright," he said quietly. "I think you've got a pretty good excuse."

"Hm." Jasper agreed, letting his eyes slide closed with the gentle touches on his back.

"Want me to go so you can sleep?" Edward asked gently.

"I don't think I'm going to sleep, but you don't have to stay," Jasper answered. He wasn't used to being looked after, and he wasn't _that_ sick, really. Besides, he didn't think their relationship was quite at that stage. "Thanks for the movies and checking in. I might be at dinner tonight."

"Do you _want_ me to leave?" Edward's hand stilled, his warm palm pressed against Jasper's spine.

"No," Jasper said softly. "But I don't want you to feel like you have to stay, if you have other things to do." He smiled weakly at Edward. "It's just a cold, and I've been taking care of myself for a long time." It's all true, but he has to admit to himself that he felt slightly less miserable pressed against Edward's side.

Edward sighed. "I want to stay, and I don't have to be anywhere else until after lunch. So let me make you another mug of tea and we can watch a movie until I have to go to my next class."

Jasper nodded and surrendered his empty mug, smiling when he saw Edward's grin of triumph. Jasper shuffled off the bed to retrieve his laptop while Edward disappeared into the kitchen. He found the stack of movies Edward had brought with him next to the supplies Esme had dropped off, and went through them. He held up _Mamma Mia_ as Edward returned with two mugs, his limp more pronounced without his cane.

"It's Abba," Edward said with a shrug.

Jasper laughed tiredly and decided it would do and he shifted everything to the bed. Edward handed him a steaming mug once he'd set everything down and plugged the computer in. Edward set the movie up while Jasper tried to get comfortable again, but couldn't seem to manage.

"Here." Edward ushered Jasper forward while the previews started up on the DVD and he slid in behind Jasper, setting his own mug on the window ledge at his shoulder. Jasper found himself being gently tugged back against Edward so he was half against his shoulder and chest, Edward's left arm draped over his waist. "Better?"

Jasper nodded. "Yeah." He relaxed against Edward, despite feeling pretty crappy physically, he was fairly content in the moment.

Edward tugged the computer closer and navigated the movie viewing program to get them to the feature. His fingers once again slipped under the hem of Jasper's hoodie, and between the warm touch, the tea, and the gentle rhythm of Edward's breathing and heartbeat under Jasper's ear, he was asleep before the second song was finished.

He woke again a few hours later. The drugs he'd taken that morning had worn off and the stuffed cement feeling had returned. Jasper glanced around, noting he was alone again and frowned, until he saw a note on top of his computer.

_Jas, I had a class to get to and I didn't want to wake you. Hopefully I'll see you at dinner. –E_

He smiled softly before sneezing into his elbow again. He cleaned up a bit and took another dose of the decongestant before settling down with his computer to check his email, certain there would be messages from students since he wouldn't be holding office hours. He wasn't disappointed.

It took him a couple of hours to muddle through everything, fighting off the sluggish haze that settled over him with the meds. But it kept him from being a sneezing, sniffling, sniveling mess, so he accepted the trade off. Several of his students had questions regarding the exam or study materials and there were a few requests for letters of recommendation that Jasper flagged to look at later. When he finished the work he had to do, it was nearly 4 in the afternoon.

Though his body was tired, Jasper's mind was awake since he'd worked through the fuzzed over feeling. He curled up with a book, the latest in one of his favorite series about an intergalactic diplomat and her guardians. He lost himself within the burgeouning relationship between the diplomat and her lead guard and their adventure until his phone beeped, pulling him away from the story.

Jasper reached for his phone and found a text from Bella, asking if he was coming to dinner. He wasn't very hungry, but he needed out of the room for awhile, so sent back an affirmative reply. He slipped into his trainers and grabbed his coat and keys and headed out for the dining hall.

It wasn't raining as he made his way across campus, but it was cold and he huddled down in his coat, feeling like it cut right through him. He sighed softly as he entered the warm building. Jasper quickly made his selections of soup, toast, and water and found his way to the group's regular table.

"Hey, Jazzy," Alice greeted him as he took a seat between Bella and Edward per usual. "Feeling any better?"

He shrugged. "A bit."

Alice's eyes grew wide and she giggled. "Check out the Barry White impression."

Jasper rolled his eyes, but heard the quiet laughter from everyone and smiled. "Shut it," he grumbled good naturedly at the teasing. He ate quietly as the others resumed their conversations. Edward's hand found its way to his thigh at some point, the warmth easily seeping through Jasper's sweats, and he smiled softly in Edward's direction.

"Jasper, I have some things for you from your sub, if you want them," Bella said as they began to clear out for the evening.

"Sure," he said. "It'll give me something to look at tomorrow."

She fished a folder from her bag and handed it over. She tiptoed up and kissed his cheek. "See you tomorrow," Bella said before leaving toward her dorm.

They all split up from there, and Jasper walked back to his dorm alone, since Emmett wanted to walk with Rosalie, who still wasn't feeling back to a hundred percent. When he got back, he reheated the last of Esme's tea and queued up another of Edward's loaned DVDs. After the movie, he took a final dose of cold medicine for the night and let sleep claim him.

Wednesday passed much like Tuesday had, only with slightly more boredom. With all the sleep Jasper had had on Tuesday, his mind was wide awake when he woke just after 8 am on Wednesday morning, and he occupied himself with the class work Bella had passed on from his sub and finalizing his final exams. He still felt like crap, and his small trash can rapidly filled with tissues, but Jasper forced himself to do work since he was awake.

Once the school work was finished, assuaging his guilt for having called in sick when he probably could have managed, he let himself get lost in the novel he'd been reading the previous day, and managed to finish it. Izzy Higginbotham was one of his favorite authors and he was already looking forward to the next book in the series she was supposed to be putting out sometime in the next year.

Thursday morning Jasper woke feeling much closer to human than he had the previous two days, but still skipped out on the gym. He could feel the congestion breaking up and didn't feel quite well enough for physical exertion. He lingered in the hot shower, letting the steam help clear his head, and got ready for classes, looking forward to an easy day of administering exams before the long weekend.

Thankfully, Jasper wasn't the only one sniffling during exams so his students couldn't protest the noise too much. It looked like there were a few students who'd had to drag themselves to class; there wouldn't be any makeup tests for midterms.

With exams finished, Jasper had no reason to maintain his office hours for the day. He packed his six piles of tests into his messenger bag, pulled on his coat and made a dash for the dining hall, having forgotten his umbrella. He was pleased to find that the dining hall was serving tomato soup and grilled cheese sandwiches for dinner, his inner child jumping for joy at the sight of one of his favorite foods. He glanced at the dessert station, knowing one thing would make his evening absolutely perfect and – yes. No bake cookies. He grabbed two, not willing to risk them disappearing before he got back after he finished eating.

"What happened to your freakishly tiny sweet tooth?" Edward's voice greeted him quietly as Jasper filled a mug with hot water before dropping in a lemon wedge. He was sick of tea, but warm honey lemon water would help warm him up and soothe his throat. "That's a lot of dessert. Well, for you, at least."

"My favorite," Jasper confided. "I didn't want to risk you or Emmett eating them all," he said with a smirk.

Edward smiled. "I'm glad you're feeling better."

Jasper's smirk softened to a smile. "Thanks." He followed Edward out into the seating area where they joined the others in their more or less regular positions, Jasper between Edward and Bella as usual, with Alice on Edward's other side. He wasn't sure if it was a conscious arrangement or not, but he didn't fight it.

"You look better," Alice commented when Jasper sat.

"Thanks, Alice."

"So, you're going this weekend, right?" she peered at Jasper from around Edward. "It's going to be so much fun."

"I don't know," Jasper hedged. He wasn't sure he was feeling well enough to spend a weekend travelling and playing tourist, despite how much he'd been looking forward to it. "I think I'd better stay here. I could use the chance to catch up on some sleep."

"Aw, Jasper, that's no fun." Alice put on a pouty face and the rest of the table laughed quietly at the expression. "Anyway," she said, waving her hand in dismissal. "I've already seen you coming, so you really can't argue."

"You've _seen_ it?" Jasper asked confused, dipping his spoon into his tomato soup.

Emmett groaned from across the table and Rose smacked him lightly on his chest.

"I'm kind of psychic," Alice said with a shrug. "Anyway, I had a dream and I saw you at tea with the rest of the family. So, you're going!"

"Really, Alice," Jasper tried to protest, filing away that tidbit of information for further examination in the future.

"Nope!" she said cheerfully. "I've gotten nice rooms at the Empress, so you can always just stay in if you want, but you're coming with us."

"Is she always this pushy?" Jasper asked no one in particular.

"Yes," Bella and Edward chorused while Alice said a very loud "no!" Jasper laughed quietly and shook his head.

"Alright. I'm apparently not getting out of it. Who am I rooming with?" Jasper asked good naturedly, hoping she hadn't gone overboard and booked him a single room.

"Me, Bella, and Edward," Alice answered, bouncing a little in her seat since she'd gotten her way. "It's going to be a great weekend."

Jasper wasn't convinced, but he nodded and gave in, knowing it really wasn't worth fighting about, and besides, Alice was right. If he felt bad, he could just stay in the hotel room and rest. "Alright, but you have to promise me if I tell you I'm not up to going out you'll let me be."

"Done," Edward said, fixing his cousin with a look Jasper couldn't see from his position. Alice pouted, but relented with a huff.

The rest of dinner passed in comfortable conversation about what everyone wanted to do on their vacation. Jasper wrapped his second cookie bar in a napkin to take back to his room and bundled back up for the trek to his dorm. When he was back he packed a duffel bag and set his alarm; Alice wanted to be on the road early. The only consolation was that he'd get the chance to sleep more in the car and on the ferry.

Sleep claimed him easily that night, and Jasper welcomed it.

* * *

Don't feel too bad for Jas. He gets to cuddle with Edward, after all. ~_^

Part 2 next week.


	12. Chapter 11: MidSemester part 2

Over 300 reviews? You guys rock my socks. Seriously.

Thanks as always to Naelany and wishingforlove for holding my hand through grammar corrections and dropped words and helping me figure stuff out.

* * *

Edward woke with a sense of dread Friday morning. His alarm had gone off at 5:30 in the morning because Alice wanted to be on the road by 7. It wasn't the early morning hour that had him wanting to pull the covers back over his head; it was the scratchy throat and pounding headache. Fuck. Jasper'd been right – he didn't want that shit.

He knew he should beg off the trip to Canada and stay home. But he really didn't want to miss out on spending more time with Jasper and hanging out with everyone else. They didn't get to spend much time just hanging out off campus except for dinner's ad his mom and dad's, and they had to take every chance they could get. That's why they had worked so hard at talking Jasper into going with them. Edward knew if he begged off that Jasper would stay behind.

He couldn't decide if a weekend alone, miserable, was better than a weekend with Jasper, his folks and family, miserable.

It took him just a few minutes to make a decision. He texted Alice and his mother first, then Jasper.

_Sick. Staying home. Have a good wknd_

He didn't have to wait long for the reply. It was pretty much what Edward had expected.

_want company?_

Edward smiled before muffling a sneeze in his elbow. _always. But you should go have fun. bring me back a postcard._

Jasper's reply came a moment later. _go back to sleep. Ill bring food l8r_

Edward had been right. He didn't go back to bed, though. He slipped his glasses on and hobbled to the door, unlocking it. Instead of picking him up for the drive, he was sure his mother would show up with tea and soup and fuss over him before she had to meet the others.

Sure enough, within ten minutes there was a light knock on his door and he croaked out an invitation to enter. His mother stepped over the threshold, a reusable grocery bag hanging from her forearm. She was dressed for travel in loose yoga pants and a hoodie, her caramel hair swept back from her face in a loose bun.

"Morning," he said hoarsely from the bed.

"Good morning, sweetheart," she greeted. "You do look under the weather." She dropped the bag on his table and settled on the edge of his bed, running her fingers through his hair. No matter how old he and Emmett got, they were still her little boys.

"I feel like shit," he muttered.

"Language," Esme scolded lightly, patting his cheek before rising. She crossed to her bag, unloading the supplies she'd brought over, including a couple containers of frozen soup and a thermos of tea. She poured out a cup of the tea and cracked open a box of cold medicine. "We'll miss you this weekend. Are you sure you'll be okay on your own?" She perched back on the edge of his bed and handed him the cup and the pills.

"Jasper's going to stay, mom," he told her, trying not to roll his eyes at her fussing. He accepted the offering and swallowed the pills down.

"Oh?" Her frown transformed into a sly grin.

"Mother, stop it." He punctuated his statement with a sneeze.

"What?"

"You know what," he said, reaching for the box of tissues he kept on his nightstand. "You'd better go before Alice throws a fit."

"You're right. Feel better, sweetheart." She kissed his forehead. "You should go to the house instead of staying here all weekend. You'd be more comfortable, especially with the dining hall mostly closed."

"Thanks, Mom. I'll think about it." It made sense. He could curl up on their large couch and sleep in his old double bed in the room she still maintained for him.

"Alright. See you on Monday. Call us if you need anything." She retrieved her empty bag and crossed to the door.

"I will. Have fun." She disappeared out the door and Edward slumped back into his covers, shuddering as a chill ran through him. He drained the tea and slipped his glasses back off, snuggling down into his bed and letting sleep take him again.

Edward woke up groggily sometime later to a knocking at the door. He coughed and cleared his throat. "It's open," he called hoarsely.

Jasper appeared on the other side of the door. His nose was still a bit pink and he looked washed out against his black hoodie. He had a duffel bag slung over his shoulder as he stepped into the room. "Hey."

"Hi," Edward said, finding a smile despite feeling like crap. "Going somewhere?" he nodded toward the bag, shifting under his blankets to sit up slightly and face Jasper.

Jasper grinned. "Esme called and strongly suggested I retrieve you and take you home." He dropped his bag on the floor near Edward's wardrobe and crossed the room to perch on the edge of Edward's bed. "I thought it best not to argue with her."

"You didn't have to stay with me, y'know," Edward said, picking invisible fuzz from his duvet.

Jasper shrugged. "I didn't really feel up to going anyway, so you gave me a good excuse." A tired cough and sniffle seemed to make his case for him and Edward decided to drop the subject.

Besides, Edward really didn't want to pass up a chance to spend more time with Jasper, even if neither of them were feeling particularly like themselves. "Okay." He showered and packed a small bag while Jasper occupied himself with a novel.

The drive to his parents' house was short and quiet, Edward focusing on not falling asleep behind the wheel. He probably should have let Jasper drive, but the thought didn't occur to him until they were nearly there.

"Help yourself to anything," Edward said through a yawn as he settled on the large couch in the living room, reaching for the remote. He pulled the afghan from the back of the couch over his shoulders and curled up into the corner of the sofa. Everything hurt, and he realized he hadn't taken any of his pain medication for the day.

"Do you need anything?" Jasper asked, settling their bags near the foot of the stairs then joining Edward on the couch.

Edward shook his head. "I'm fine," he said quietly, slumping down, feeling cold, achy, miserable, and tired. He felt a warm hand on the back of his neck, easing the tension in his shoulders as it rubbed gently.

"Go back to sleep, Edward," Jasper drawled quietly.

He was lulled into unconsciousness by the murmurings of morning news shows and the warm steady hand at the back of his neck.

His sleep was not peaceful. First he dreamed he was in an arctic city, casually dressed and freezing as he crossed the campus of Forks Academy. The snowy landscape faded and was replaced by a desert. He rapidly grew parched from the heat and he knew he needed to find water or shelter soon. He was getting dehydrated too quickly.

"Edward?" Someone was calling his name from far away. He turned in circles, trying to find the source.

"Edward." More insistent. Closer.

"Wake up, Edward," the voice demanded gently.

"Hm." Edward batted away the hand on his cheek. It was too warm. He was too warm.

"Wake up, babe, just for a minute." He recognized that soft twang. Jasper.

Edward blinked his eyes open and focused with some difficulty on Jasper. "Wha?" When Jasper's face wouldn't come into sharp focus he realized he wasn't wearing his glasses or contacts and he frowned. They'd been watching TV in his parents' living room.

"Take these, and you can go back to sleep," Jasper said, holding out his hand, a couple of pills in his palm. "You've spiked a fever," he explained softly.

Wordlessly, Edward took the pills into his own hand and tossed them into his mouth, quickly swallowing with the bottle of water Jasper handed him. He gave the bottle back and curled back up, drifting back to sleep.

He floated in an out of sleep, hearing Jasper move around the house occasionally, and the quiet sounds of the television. At one point he thought he felt himself being moved, his legs stretched out and his weaker right leg getting a gentle massage.

"I'm not sure you're awake," someone was saying softly. "But I'm going to run out to the store. I'll be back, and I've got my phone."

Edward murmured something and sighed softly, someone's cool hand against his cheek, then in his hair. He heard the door open and close and he slipped deeper into sleep in the silent house. He woke fully sometime later, a harsh cough jarring him awake. The drapes had been pulled over the downstairs windows, leaving the room mostly dark. The television was off, and Edward couldn't hear anyone else moving around. Hadn't Jasper come with him?

When he sat up he saw the note on the table, and remembered the quiet words. After putting his glasses on so he could i_read/i_ the note, Edward drank the last of the tea in his cup, grimacing at the cold bitter taste, and levered himself up to make another fresh cup.

He plugged in the base for the electric kettle and filled the carafe with water. While it heated he sat slumped in one of the chairs. The clock on the microwave read 2:34. He had no idea where the day had gone. When the pot clicked off, signaling the water was hot, Edward slid from his chair and went to make himself a cup of hot lemon honey water.

Only when he went to the fruit basket hanging in the corner of the kitchen, there weren't any lemons. Perfect. Edward sighed, only to end up coughing, and just felt plain miserable. He was reaching for the cupboard where his mom kept the tea bags and coffee when the front door opened.

"Edward?"

"Kitchen," he called back. He pulled down a box of tea bags, combing through them, looking for something that sounded good. Nothing really did.

Jasper came through carrying two paper bags. He set them on the counter and pulled out a produce bag, handing it to Edward. Lemons.

"Thanks," he said quietly, reaching into the drawer for a knife and cutting board.

"No problem," Jasper answered, unloading the rest of his purchases. A new pot of honey appeared on the counter along with a small loaf of French bread, a couple bottles of Gatorade, a package of Oreo cookies, and a few other items. He didn't really put anything away, but folded up the empty bags. "How're you feeling?"

Edward shrugged, squeezing lemon juice into the hot water and reaching for the honey. "I've been better."

Jasper stepped a bit closer and Edward shifted his weight slightly toward him in response. He misjudged, however, and stumbled, off balance.

"Whoa," Jasper breathed, steadying him before he could fall. "Are you alright?"

Edward felt himself turned to face Jasper and peered back at the blonde as he was studied. "I'm fine," he said, jerking away only to stumble into the counter.

"Sure." Jasper sounded unconvinced. "Go sit down," he said gently, nudging Edward lightly toward the living room. "I'll get this."

"I said I'm _fine_," Edward all but growled.

"You really are crap at letting someone else take care of you," Jasper commented, reaching for the cabinet overhead for another mug.

"Fuck off," Edward growled, but between how husky his voice had gone and all the congestion it wasn't nearly as threatening as he meant it to be. He also knew Jasper was right, but as had been proven time and time again, Edward didn't like to be observed at his worst. He also desperately wanted to just cuddle up with Jasper and _sleep_, but he couldn't bring himself to ask.

"Well, if you think you've got the energy, you're welcome to try," Jasper drawled, teasing. "Edward." Jasper's tone was softer. "I'm not trying to make you feel helpless. I care about you, and I want you to feel better." He shifted to stand behind Edward, and though Edward was only a couple inches shorter than Jasper, he fit easily against him. Jasper's arms wrapped lightly around Edward's waist and Edward felt Jasper's gentle breath stir his hair.

Edward slumped slightly into the embrace. "I know," he said quietly. They stood there for a few minutes in quiet.

Jasper broke the silence. "Why don't you pick out a couple movies. Is there a DVD player in your room?"

Edward nodded. "Yes."

"I think that might be more comfortable than the couch," Jasper commented. "Want to head up? I'll follow you with everything and we can just camp out and watch movies."

Edward wondered how he managed to find someone so understanding. He didn't know how or why, but Jasper just seemed to know what Edward needed. Of course, he was also dangerously close to flushing out Edward's secret fondness for cuddling. "Okay," he said quietly. He shifted away but not before Jasper's arms tightened around him briefly.

He shuffled off into the living room to select a few movies from the huge collection his parents had amassed over the years. He picked a few and slowly made his way upstairs to his room. Esme had decorated his room in shades of blue, which was peaceful and comforting. He queued up the first film, an older Robin Williams comedy, "Toys," and settled in the bed after turning the duvet down.

Jasper arrived with a tray a few minutes later. He placed it on the bed at Edward's feet. Two steaming mugs and bowls, part of the loaf of bread sliced up, the package of Oreos joined the pot of honey and sliced lemons. Jasper also set the electric kettle on the small desk, effectively making it so they wouldn't have to leave the room for awhile.

Just as Jasper had struggled a few days previously, Edward couldn't seem to get comfortable. He all but growled in frustration as he shifted, eyeing the tray warily as he fought to find a position that let him breathe and didn't cause his tense back anymore pain.

Jasper chuckled softly. "Sit up," he said with a smile. He rearranged the pillows behind Edward and slipped into the bed, sitting against the headboard. "Come here," he patted the space next to him.

Edward slid back on the sheets, settling his head against Jasper's shoulder, pillows cushioning his lower back.

"Better?" Jasper asked, a hint of amusement lacing his voice.

"Much." Edward shifted slightly when Jasper reached for the tray, placing it between them. Though he wasn't particularly hungry, Edward took one of the bowls of soup. "Thank you."

Jasper smiled. "Don't thank me. I just heated up what was in the freezer," he said lightly.

Edward laughed quietly, savoring his mother's soup as it warmed and relaxed him. They watched the movie as they ate and Edward found himself dozing off halfway through the film. He didn't fight it.

Edward's pillow was firm, he noted, as he snuggled down into it, hearing a steady thumping under his ear. He pressed his nose into the soft cotton, muffling a sneeze. The snoring under his ear stuttered and resumed. Snoring?

He cracked his eyes open and struggled to focus, recognizing the light blue paint of his room at his parents' house. But the white fabric under his cheek was unfamiliar; his linens were a deep blue. He blinked and sat up, confused.

What he'd thought was his pillow was actually Jasper's chest. The blonde was propped up against the headboard of Edward's bed, snoring quietly as he slept. The pillow case was actually Jasper's t-shirt, and the warmth along Edward's back was Jasper's arm, not an overabundance of blankets.

Edward muffled another sneeze in his elbow and the light snoring stopped.

"Edward?" Jasper asked sleepily, his arm tightening around Edward's body. "Okay?"

He realized that they'd fallen asleep watching a movie, much like they'd done in Jasper's room earlier in the week.

"Yeah," he whispered. "Come on, you can't be comfortable like that," he said, his voice low and rough. He shifted off of Jasper's chest to one side and tugged lightly until Jasper was laying prone in the bed. He noticed that the movie had changed and the tray was missing from the bed, so Jasper had to have gotten up at some point without disturbing Edward.

"Hm," Jasper muttered, shifting slightly, though remaining on his back. He reached out for Edward. "Sleep."

Edward couldn't help but smile as he laid back down, turning into Jasper's side, nuzzling the warmth of him as he rested his head against Jasper's chest, drifting back to sleep with Jasper's arm over him.

* * *

I didn't realize this chapter was so short...I'll make up for it soon. Sorry for making you wait a week for 3k words. But there was more cuddling! :D

Also, I may be posting the first chapter a new fic soon -I haven't decided yet. So, if you're interested in a new JasperxBella New Moon AU, tag that box that says Subscribe to Author (Author Alert) when you leave a review.


	13. Chapter 12: Tempers and Parties

Once again, thanks to wishingforlove and Naelany for their support, and to all my readers for hanging on with me.

* * *

As soon as the rest of the Cullen clan returned from the break, Alice jumped into planning the Halloween party held at the Cullens for faculty and staff. The students had their own party on campus that was organized by the student council and their faculty mentors. It was one committee Jasper was glad he wasn't on.

While Alice was getting the party put together, Edward flew into pre-concert mode, having a Jazz concert the night before Halloween. His already cranky disposition from the lingering chest infection that took hold in the wake of his cold had combined with the stress of the first concert of the year and made him nearly unbearable to be around.

His friends and family let it go on for nearly a week until dinner Friday evening. It had been four weeks since anyone had seen or heard anything from James, and Bella was starting to seem more like the girl Jasper had first met; even the others had commented that she was back to her sarcastic witty self.

They were all a bit punchy, being Friday night after they'd had a four day weekend and the energy in the cafeteria was palpable as the students and faculty buzzed around. Alice was rambling about the party that the Cullens were hosting, and Bella was lost in her own little world, scribbling on a legal pad, looking up occasionally as someone spoke to her. Edward was running late, so Alice had gotten her food and sat with the rest of them. Rosalie and Emmett were sitting close together as usual, adding to the chaotic conversation around them.

"Bella, what are you working on?" Alice asked, tossing a grape tomato at her friend's head until she looked up.

"New story," Bella said, rolling her eyes and throwing the tomato back. Jasper smiled, waiting for the inevitable food fight.

"Ooh, really?" Alice perked up, excited.

"Yup." Bella beamed. "I think I'll be able to meet my summer deadline." She sat back in her chair and flung her hands back over her head, stretching, only to flinch and spin at the sudden cursing that sounded behind her.

Jasper turned to see Edward just behind Bella, wearing his tray of dinner. He bit his tongue to keep from laughing, but Bella wasn't as able to manage. She let out a peal of giggles as she jumped from her chair to help him.

"Oh, God, Edward, I'm sorry," she said through her laughter.

"Jesus Christ, Bella. Can't you spare us all your clumsiness for one fucking night?" Edward growled, slapping her hands and the napkins she held away.

"It was an accident, Edward," Bella said with a roll of her eyes. "Don't cry, emo boy," she teased. "It's just spilled milk." She resumed her efforts to clean up the milk running down his chest and front of his trousers.

Jasper, in his effort to not laugh, snorted, and Alice, Rosalie, and Emmett burst out with laughter.

"Stop trying to cop a cheap feel. Jesus, Bella," Edward complained. "If you were that desperate you shouldn't have run James off."

Everyone froze, except Edward. "I mean, fuck, I gave you a chance and you turned me down. I won't take James' sloppy seconds, even for you. So stop throwing yourself at me, 'cause it's just not going to fucking happen, alright? I know I'm pathetic, but I haven't sunk that low." With that, Edward threw the rest of his tray on the floor and stormed off.

"Edward!" Emmett thundered, rising out of his seat, but Edward had the element of surprise and Rosalie tugged Emmett back down into his seat with the quiet admonishment to just let him go.

Jasper's first instinct was also to follow Edward and give him a what-for, but instead he rose and tugged Bella into a tight hug, her quiet sobs muffled further by his shirt, which quickly grew damp from her tears.

"Shh, darlin', he didn't mean it," Jasper consoled her softly. "He's just upset."

Bella nodded against him. "I know. But he didn't have to be so mean."

"No, he didn't," Jasper agreed.

Bella pulled away and Jasper ran his thumbs across her cheeks to wipe away her tears. "Want me to beat him up for you?" He asked.

Bella giggled, sniffling.

"Better yet, I'll hold him down while you do it," Jasper offered.

"Just go find him and calm him down," Bella said with a sigh. "And try to figure out what's got his panties in a twist. He's been a grump all week, but this just…there's something wrong, Jas, and you're probably the only one he'll talk to."

"Alright, but I'll still hold him down so you can kick him in the balls." Jasper grinned and kissed her forehead and released Bella over to Alice while Jasper gathered his tray. He met Emmett's gaze and nodded, silently promising to look after Edward and took off toward the exit as the others rallied around Bella.

After disposing of his tray, Jasper checked all of Edward's regular haunts on campus, but didn't find him in his room, his office, the gym, or the library. He jogged back to his room for his car keys, having a pretty good idea where Edward would be hiding off campus, especially seeing how he didn't get to eat any of his supper before having it land on his clothes.

True enough, Jasper found him tucked into his favorite booth at the diner, nursing a cup of coffee with a picked over slice of pie in front of him. Jasper stood at the edge of the table. "I know you're not feeling well, and I get that you're under a lot of stress with this concert, but that was unacceptable," he said bluntly.

"I know," Edward answered dejectedly, and Jasper could see that he was truly contrite.

Jasper sighed and slid into the booth, Maggie bringing over an iced tea without being asked. "I told her I'd hold you down so she could kick you in the balls."

Edward nodded. "I deserve it," he said in that same dead tone.

"Yeah, you really do, you prick," Jasper said with a sigh. He took a long pull of his tea to calm himself down. "Want to tell me what's going on." It wasn't really a question.

Edward sighed and stared at his plate, pushing his decimated dessert around on his plate without actually eating it. He wouldn't lift his gaze to meet Jasper's, which annoyed the blonde, but he stuffed it down.

"Edward," he said quietly. "Withdrawing to keep from hurting yourself or someone else is one thing," he said. "Lashing out is something entirely different. Talk to me," he urged softly. "I can't help you if you don't tell me what's bothering you."

"Maybe I don't want your help," Edward said weakly.

"Bullshit," Jasper swore. He looked around for Maggie; he had a feeling he was going to need coffee. "This goes beyond just stress, Edward. You've been leading this band for over a year and you were a performer before that, so I can't believe you're this freaked out over a first concert of the season. What's going on?" He knew something was bothering Edward but he had no idea what. What he'd seen at dinner went beyond mood swings. "You don't just throw something like that in your best friend's face because of an accidentally spilled dinner. If it'd happened to anyone else you'd have been rolling on the floor laughing."

Edward sighed, ending on a cough that had been plaguing him all week. "I don't know," he said eventually. "I just snapped." He paused and took a drink from his mug and Jasper waited for him to continue. "It's been a long week, and everything had just been building. It's not an excuse or a good explanation, but I'm not sure I really have one."

Jasper thought carefully for a moment before responding. "You've been cranky all week, and I get part of that is that you're frustrated with yourself because you're still sick," he said slowly. "What happened? I haven't seen you much this week, so tell me what's going on."

Edward poked at his pie a bit more, and didn't lift his eyes from the plate as he began speaking. "At rehearsal on Tuesday, half the ensemble was out sick," he started. "A few others just blew off coming, either to extend the holiday or because they knew the rehearsal would be crap because of the lack of personnel. Either way, I had to cancel the rehearsal, leaving us with only three before the concert, which makes me uncomfortable. I sent out an email to everyone expecting them to be there on Thursday."

Jasper remembered that Edward had seemed particularly sullen at dinner on Tuesday evening, but at the time had chalked it up to the chest infection Carlisle had diagnosed when they'd returned on Monday afternoon.

"I didn't get much sleep Tuesday night and Wednesday was an all around bad day," Edward continued. "I was miserable and I locked myself away trying to get my head back on straight before Thursday's rehearsal. I had to call my dad for something to help me sleep, which didn't help my overall mood any, and even though I got some sleep, yesterday didn't shape up to be much better than Wednesday had."

Jasper turned his coffee cup over for Maggie to fill as she came by to top off Edward's. "Need anything else, hon?" She asked.

"We're okay for now, Maggie. Thanks." Jasper flashed her a tight smile and she nodded her understanding, moving on to her next table.

"Yesterday I couldn't even get out of bed," Edward said softly. "My legs hurt so bad that all I could do was lie in bed and weep like a fucking baby until my dad showed up."

"Emmett was worried when you didn't meet him at the gym and didn't answer your phone," Jasper explained, filling in the gap for Edward. When he hadn't been there to meet Emmett, Jasper'd gotten to see his suite-mate's full blown brother-bear mode.

Edward nodded, still not looking up. He cursed quietly and coughed into a handkerchief draped over his hand. He was flushed when he finally stopped, clearing his throat roughly and reaching for his coffee. "All the drugs weren't helping anything. I'm pretty resistant to the idea of long term pain-killer usage, and between all this damned coughing and the weather changing, I was on more drugs than normal. It was pretty easy to slip back into that idea that I'm not worth anything because I can't even function on my own. I'm always reliant on something, be it my family, the cane, the drugs. Dad started talking about long-term pain management courses again while he sat with me yesterday morning. Rehearsal last night didn't go well; I couldn't get anyone to focus. Then at my appointment today they couldn't tell me anything definite about why I've been in more pain, lately, other than a decrease in muscle function. They can't get me in for an MRI for three more weeks. Dr. Card doesn't know what's going on but has basically told me to be prepared to have decreased function in both legs, eventually. After two years of putting myself through hell, I found out that I'm backsliding.

"So, I just kind of blew up at Bella because I was hobbling along with my tray, trying to figure out what the fuck I'm going to do if I end up in a wheelchair after all, and she made me feel like a helpless fool when she knocked my tray into me because I didn't have a firm enough grip on it. Not to mention that it was in front of everyone."

Jasper realized that the crux of the matter was that Edward was scared. He was just beginning to get his life put back together again, and had news that threatened to ruin that progress. That, on top of his already volatile moods had just caused him to lash out at something insignificant to Jasper, but what had seemed like proof to Edward of everything he feared coming true.

"It's alright to be scared, Edward," Jasper said softly.

"What?" Finally, Edward's head lifted and his green eyes bored into Jasper's.

Jasper smiled softly and reached across the table to touch the back of Edward's hand. "You told me a few weeks ago that at one point, you had resigned yourself to being in a wheelchair. Yet, here you are, able to walk, because of your determination. Finding out that all that work could be for nothing would frighten anyone, Edward, and you, more so, because you're so worried about disappointing everyone by not being strong enough."

Jasper watched as the shell closed over Edward's features and Jasper felt his own soften. "Don't hide from me, Edward," he demanded quietly. "Haven't you realized yet that none of us care if you can walk or play again? That's not what's important to your friends and family. Well, not true," Jasper clarified. "Being able to play makes _you_ happy, and your happiness is all that anyone wants for you. You aren't going to be a disappointment if you need to wallow for a bit and mourn the fact that someday you _may_ not be able to walk. May, Edward. You've got one opinion. I know it wasn't good news, but fuck, I thought you were more stubborn than that." Jasper felt himself slip from being cautiously helpful and optimistic to getting a bit angry and annoyed.

"You're right, in that none of that was a good reason for what you said to Bella. You hurt her, Edward," Jasper said patiently. "You of all people know how hard it's been for her to get over the things James said and you threw it back in her face like it was nothing at all. She probably won't stay angry at you for long, if she even is, because she's too good a person to not forgive you and she knows you didn't really mean it. But Christ, Edward, if I didn't like you so god-damned much, I'd have knocked you on your ass right then and there, disability or no."

He paused, taking a deep breath to calm himself down. "I know you didn't mean what you said back in the dining hall, but that doesn't make the words any less hurtful."

Edward nodded. "I know," he whispered.

"So how are you going to fix it?" Jasper asked, letting them focus on the short term goal of fixing Bella's hurt. Edward's would take more time, but Jasper was willing to work on it.

"Flowers?" Edward offered hopefully, a hint of a smirk on his lips.

"It'd be a start," Jasper grumbled, fighting his own smile at the hopeful look in Edward's eyes. "But I think groveling may be more appropriate. In front of everyone, since everyone was there."

The hopeful look faded from Edward's eyes and Jasper wanted to kick himself. "Edward," He said softly, reaching for the other's hand again, but not letting go. "We'll work it out. You're not going to have to deal with any of this alone. It may not be as bad as you think. Yes, you've had a shitty week capped off with shitty news, but it was just a week. It's over. You survived. Monday, you get to start over again. Put it behind you and focus on what's coming up."

Edward nodded tightly and gave Jasper's hand a squeeze before breaking their grip to smother another coughing fit.

"Did you eat?" Jasper asked when Edward had recovered.

Edward shook his head and finished his coffee.

"Okay." Jasper looked around again for Maggie. "Can we get two cheeseburgers, an order of fries and an order of onion rings, to go, please?" He asked her politely. "Oh, and a slice of peanut butter pie?"

"Sure thing, hon. More coffee?" Maggie asked with a wink.

"I'm good. Edward?"

"Just more water, thanks," he said hoarsely.

"Alrighty. Be a few minutes on your order," she said, scribbling everything down on her pad and walking away, returning a moment later with a large glass of iced water for Edward.

"To go?" Edward asked.

"I'm ready for a quiet evening with a few movies," Jasper answered. "I was thinking we could go back to mine? After we go drop that slice of pie off for Bella," he said.

Edward nodded, relieved. "Yeah, I'd like that."

They got their food and returned to campus in their separate cars. Jasper left Edward to deliver his peace offering and apology to Bella and went to his room with the food, setting up his laptop with one of the movies he'd recently gotten through Netflix.

"Hey, man," Emmett tapped lightly on the open door to the kitchenette. "Everything cool?"

Jasper nodded. "Yeah, we got it sorted. He's gone to apologize and we're going to hang out."

Emmett fidgeted. "He tell you what's up?"

"You'll have to talk to him, Em," Jasper said with a sigh. "He did tell me, but it's not my place to say anything. He had a rough week and it just came to a head."

"Yeah, he's always had issues with his temper." Emmett smiled "Alright, Rosie and I are off for the night. Need anything?"

"No – oh, wait," Jasper said. "Can I borrow your beanbag?" It would be more comfortable to recline on than pillows propped against the walls.

"Sure." Emmett disappeared and returned a moment later, chucking the chair in Jasper's direction. "And thanks, man. For going after him tonight and for just getting it. I'm glad he's got you around."

Jasper felt himself flush lightly and nodded tightly. "Me too," he admitted.

Emmett grinned and waved. "Don't do anything I wouldn't do," he called over his shoulder before vanishing back into his half of the suite.

Jasper changed into more casual clothes and Edward arrived a few minutes later, looking slightly less tense.

"She forgave me," Edward said quietly, lingering in the doorway.

"I told you she would," Jasper responded. "Come in. I'm not going to hit you. If I was, I'd have done it already."

That earned him a small smile as Edward limped into the room. "I'm sorry," Edward said quietly and Jasper smiled softly, folding him into a hug, sensing he just needed the extra reassurance the physical contact could provide.

"I know," Jasper murmured. "You're forgiven," he said quietly.

They broke apart eventually and found themselves curled up on Jasper's bed eating their late and cold dinner while watching movies. Edward dozed off first, and Jasper shut down the computer and slipped it off the bed before curling up in the too small bed against Edward, holding him close and falling into an easy sleep as well.

Edward presented Bella with a large bouquet of flowers at the family dinner the next evening, and in lieu of hitting him, Bella made Edward promise to attend two weeks of yoga classes with her at the school gym. Jasper thought he was getting off lightly, but Bella later told Jasper that Edward had explained things, and she'd forgiven him.

The rest of the week went better with Edward in an improved mood as the lingering cough began to fade and the reassurance that things were going to be okay. Jasper gave Edward and Emmett space to talk during their time at the gym on Monday, which seemed to help Edward understand that his family wouldn't give up on him. The concert was a success with a good majority of the school community turning out as well as a lot of the general population of Forks. The students performed well and Edward had practically been beaming. Jasper discovered another Cullen family tradition as they ended up at Edward's favorite diner for dessert after the concert. He learned that when Edward and Emmett were in high school, after every game or concert they went out for dessert, and the tradition continued whenever possible even though they had grown into adults.

The next morning, Jasper and the others were roped into helping Alice finish decorating for the party that evening. Jasper dressed in jeans and a t-shirt for the chores ahead, having already been informed that Alice had chosen his costume and had it at the house. He met up with Edward and they drove over together in Edward's car.

"I'm thinking about selling my car," Jasper announced as they made the trip to the Cullen home.

"Why?" Edward asked, a line appearing between his brows as he frowned.

Jasper shrugged. "I don't need it here. I hardly ever go anywhere on my own, and it's not like I couldn't borrow a ride if I needed one. Well, Rosalie may not lend me her car," he said with a grin. "But the rest of you wouldn't deny me."

Edward seemed to consider that. "True. But it's not hurting anyone to have it parked, and it might be nice to have a backup just in case."

Jasper hadn't considered that. "It was just a thought." He smiled softly and gave Edward's hand a squeeze. "Are you alright? You seem a bit jumpy."

"I just have a bad feeling about tonight," Edward explained. "I'm probably just being ridiculous," he said with a small smile. "It's Alice's party, and no one dares cross Alice. Halloween has to be one of her favorite holidays. She gets the chance to design unique costumes for everyone that we otherwise wouldn't be caught dead wearing."

Jasper laughed quietly. "I can understand why. She's pretty scary when she wants to be. But I'm glad she's happy that everyone goes along with her." When they stopped at a light Jasper kissed Edward lightly. "I'm sure everything will be fine," Jasper said. "It's just a costume party."

"I know. Like I said, it's probably nothing but me being paranoid." Edward flashed him a crooked smile.

When they arrived at Esme and Carlisle's, Alice was already in full party planner mode. Carlisle, it seemed, was well familiar with his niece's personality, and had made himself scarce. Edward joked that his father's 'important meeting' was probably out on the golf course. Esme was in the kitchen preparing food with Rosalie and Bella, leaving Emmett, Edward, and Jasper to help with the decorations and heavy lifting of shifting furniture.

Jasper dutifully followed the orders he was given with considerably less grumbling than Emmett or Edward, which didn't help them when it came to Alice's distribution of work. They moved the furniture in the living room to line the walls, leaving the center of the room open for dancing and mingling. The television had been taken down to the basement where people could go watch scary movies and play foosball or pool on the game tables.

Esme fed them a lunch of sandwiches and soup and told stories of Halloween's past which, after much protesting from Emmett and Edward, included pictures from the family albums. Jasper was amused by one photo in which the brothers appeared to be around 10 and 8, dressed in matching dinosaur costumes made by Esme. Apparently they'd wanted the costumes for a party at their summer camp and Esme made them on the condition they wore them for the following Halloween as well. Emmett looked rather grumpy in the photo. He'd wanted to go as a football player that year.

It took them another hour to finish getting everything to Alice's standards after they'd eaten. From there they adjourned to the back patio to carve pumpkins to line the walk way and decorate the front porch. Alice, in her efforts to keep everything perfect, stenciled faces onto most of the squash for everyone to follow, and everyone teased Bella about handling a knife. Esme cleaned up all the innards and spread the pumpkin seeds out to dry before roasting them. Carlisle returned just as they were dropping tea-light candles into the pumpkins lining the walk leading to the front door.

It was early evening by the time they finished, and there were already costumed younger children dragging parents around for their quotas of candy for the year. Esme had purchased a variety of suckers and lollipops to hand out and made it a point to gush over every child that showed up on her doorstep.

An hour before the party was supposed to begin, after handing out candy in turns and enjoying each other's company for the last little while before everything started, Alice chivvied them all upstairs to get dressed for the evening.

"How on Earth does the girl find time for all of this?" Jasper wondered aloud as he fingered the costume laid out on Edward's bed. There were two pretty identical looking sets of clothes displayed for them. Jasper wondered what Alice had up her sleeve at dressing them as 19th century gentlemen.

"I'm beginning to think she doesn't sleep. Ever," Edward answered dryly. But he looked up at Jasper with a grin and a shrug. "At least she's paired me up with someone this year. She usually tries to stick the couples together somehow."

"I'm not sure I want to know about her past ideas," Jasper said with a laugh.

"Last year it was House, which was strangely appropriate and meant I got to wear jeans, sneakers, and didn't have to shave for a couple days," Edward said, brandishing his cane. "The year before that it was FDR," he said with a scowl. "It worked because it pretty much let me sit around with a blanket on my lap and a cigarette between my teeth." He smirked.

"Well, as much as it would have matched your attitude lately," Jasper teased as he sorted through his costume and began to dress, "I'm glad she didn't go for House again for you. I'm not sure I have the legs or chest to pull off Cuddy. Though Wilson…" he trailed off with a grin.

Edward laughed softly. "Alice would never repeat a costume, no matter how appropriate." His smile faded a bit. "I am sorry for the attitude the last couple weeks."

Jasper waved away the apology and tugged Edward close for a hug and a brief kiss. "Don't worry about it. You were stressed and not feeling well, and you stopped when I talked with you about it. We love you for who you are, Edward, and even if it pisses us off sometimes, we wouldn't change it."

"Is that an editorial 'we,' Dr. Whitlock?" Edward teased, relaxing into Jasper's arms for the moment.

"I – uh," Jasper stammered, caught. He cared very deeply for Edward but he wouldn't go so far as to say he was in love with him, yet. Certainly they'd grown very close in a short amount of time, but Jasper wasn't sure he could admit to that emotion, no matter what had sprung up between them.

"I'm sorry," Edward said softly, meeting Jasper's eyes. "I didn't mean to make you uncomfortable."

"I'm not," Jasper said, smiling. "I care very much for you, Edward," he said quietly.

"I know," Edward responded. "I do, too, you know."

Jasper nodded. They were on similar pages, if not the same one. "So does this mean we can classify the _this_ now?" he asked quietly.

Edward smiled and kissed Jasper softly, one warm hand wrapping around the side of Jasper's neck. "I think we can safely say we're dating now."

"Hmm," Jasper sighed, resting his forehead against Edward's. "So does this mean I'm your boyfriend?" His stomach fluttered at the question, Jasper finding himself inexplicably nervous.

"Only if you want to put up with me," Edward answered quietly, and Jasper could feel his anxiety and the fear or rejection that flashed across Edward's eyes.

"It's not putting up with you," Jasper whispered. "I'm here because I want to be. Remember that, Edward."

Edward nodded, a small smile playing over his features and Jasper kissed him again softly.

"We'd better finished getting dressed before Alice comes to hunt us down."

Edward groaned. "Let's just stay up here and hide?"

Jasper laughed. "I don't think we're getting out of it that easily. Come on." He nudged Edward toward one pile of clothes and they changed into the trousers, high collared shirts and accessories that Alice had laid out for them. There were even matching boots on the floor and instructions on how to tie the neck-cloths, which they happily did up for each other.

"Boys!" Alice's voice carried from downstairs.

"Yeah, yeah," Edward called back down and they made their way down the stairs together.

Alice was waiting at the bottom, dressed as a dark fairy with fishnet stockings and a short dark blue skirt and corset and wings that spanned nearly as far as Alice was tall. Her short black hair was spiky as usual but the tips had been done up in a bright blue, and her makeup coordinated, glitter everywhere.

For Emmett, Alice had selected an ensemble of all black, including a mask that left only his eyes revealed as he was dressed as a stereotypical ninja, complete with the soft soled split-toed boots that laced up his calves. Emmett looked entirely at ease in his costume.

Beside him, Rosalie looked resplendent as a geisha. Her long blonde hair had been swept back in a into a low bun instead of the wig, and she'd forgone the traditional makeup, but somehow Alice had dressed her in a full kimono that complimented Rose's body and coloring.

Jasper couldn't help but laugh as he caught sight of Esme and Carlisle at the door, handing out candy. Both were dressed as mad scientists, a la "The Emperor's New Groove." Both had black trousers and heavy black boots with knee length white coats and elbow length blue gloves. They had matching sets of goggles pushed up on their foreheads, and Esme's hair had been styled like the Bride of Frankenstein, complete with the streaks of white down either side. Carlisle's blonde hair had been scrubbed into a wild mess that resembled Edward's in style and texture.

"Bella! Come on!" Alice shouted.

"Coming, coming," Bella grumbled upstairs and Jasper turned to look as he heard footsteps. Suddenly his and Edward's costumes made more sense as Bella emerged in a dress of similar style to their own clothing. Alice had grouped them together as 19th century gentry. Bella's dress was floor length and simply cut, the square neckline highlighting her bosom which had been lifted, he could only assume, with a corset. A pair of flat slippers peeked from behind the hem of her dress, a pale blue with darker blue flowers and a ribbon tied just under her breasts on the empire waist-line.

"Now, gentlemen," Alice said, turning to Edward and Jasper as Bella descended the stairs. "I'm entrusting this lady to your care this evening."

Bella blushed furiously as Jasper and Edward both nodded. Jasper smiled as Edward took Bella's hand and kissed her knuckles. "Our pleasure," Edward said quietly and Bella giggled.

"Flirt," Jasper muttered to Edward, bowing over Bella's other hand. It was good to see her smiling and happy. She'd come through the thing with James fairly well, but was still somewhat haunted by the event at times. "You look lovely, Bella," Jasper told her softly.

"Thank you," she said to them both and stepped off the stairs.

"Hey, Alice. Where's your better half?" Emmett asked, the mask doing nothing to muffle his voice.

"Kate's not coming," Alice said casually, but Jasper watched a flash of hurt cross her features. "Something came up at work and she had to go in."

Emmett frowned but dropped the subject as the doorbell rang again and Esme opened it to a chorus of "Trick or Treat!"

It wasn't long before guests started to arrive and the party got into full swing. Jasper, Edward, and Bella mingled with faculty and staff, many of whom Jasper hadn't seen since the orientation day. He met spouses and significant others who he wouldn't remember due to the costumes, which ranged from simple (overalls and a plaid shirt and straw hat farmer) to more outlandish (he swore Darth Vader was Dean Harper). Carlisle and Esme were gracious hosts and everyone seemed to be having a very good time.

Jasper excused himself after a couple of hours, needing a break from the press of people in the house. He grabbed a bottle of water from the bar and ducked out onto the back patio, finding it largely abandoned and dropped into one of the lounge chairs. Noise from the party spilled outside, but Jasper was able to clear his head quite easily in the crisp cool air.

A few moments later, Edward emerged, shaking a cigarette loose from the pack and lighting up with a sigh.

"You should quit, you know," Jasper teased with a small smile as Edward crossed to him.

"Yeah, I know," Edward agreed. "I'll think about it."

Jasper shifted in his chair a bit so Edward could perch on the edge. "Where's Bella?" they'd pretty much been sticking together for the night, so it was strange to not have her with one of them.

"Powdering her nose," Edward said with a smirk. "Having fun?"

"I am," Jasper answered honestly. "It's nice seeing everyone outside of school and cutting loose."

"Oh, fuck, you're going to love the Christmas party," Edward laughed and Jasper joined him.

"Alice isn't in charge of that one is she?" Jasper shuddered in mock horror.

"Nope, the dean's wife is," Alice said, dancing across the patio to join them. "I'd ask what you're doing out here, but it's pretty obvious," she said, wrinkling her nose. "Anyway, Jazzy, can you give me a hand and bring up another case of beer from the basement? Emmett and Rose have vanished," she said with a roll of her eyes.

"Sure thing," Jasper answered, nudging Edward out of the way so he could stand. "Want 'em in the kitchen?"

"Yes, please!" Alice flashed him a bright smile and took over his seat, nestling up against Edward, who had finished his cigarette and crushed the butt under his boot.

"Done and done," he said and ducked back inside. Jasper wove his way through people to the door to the basement, frowning as a figure in blue headed up the stairs as Jasper walked past. The upstairs was pretty much off limits, though the old baby-gate they'd placed at the foot of the stairs really wouldn't deter anyone serious. With a shrug, Jasper continued on to the basement, stopping to chat with a few individuals who greeted him before he reached the open door.

The basement fun zone was active as well, people enjoying the games and a few groups clumped together around the television chatting in the slightly quieter environment. Jasper found the beer stash and grabbed up a case, making his way back to the stairs, and then the kitchen.

"Thanks, Jasper," Esme said as he set the box on the island and split the top so they could shift the cans into one of the ice buckets.

A crash from upstairs grabbed Jasper's attention, and he looked at the ceiling as though he could see through the drywall and discern what was happening.

Esme giggled. "That's probably Emmett and Rosalie," she half-whispered. She'd obviously had a couple drinks.

"Well then," Jasper teased. "Maybe they need to be reminded they're not alone?"

Esme laughed and shooed him away and Jasper took off at a brisk pace back to the stairs, the figure in blue worrying him. He easily leapt over the baby gate and took the stairs two at a time to reach the second floor.

The first door on the right was Emmett's room, Jasper remembered from his tour and the weekend he'd spent with Edward. He didn't hear any noise from inside and found the door unlocked. He braced himself for what he might find, but thankfully, the room was empty. Emmett and Rose must have left, he decided. Jasper left the door ajar and moved onto the next.

The guest bathroom was empty, the jack-o-lantern night light shining brightly in the otherwise dark room. A loud crash came again from further down the hall, which was Edward's room. Jasper frowned. Emmett wouldn't invade Edward's space that way, especially not with his own room available, and Jasper didn't think any of the guests would make use of any vacant room at random; they were adults for fuck's sake.

That's when he heard Bella. At least it sounded like Bella and he couldn't be completely sure over the music blaring from downstairs. Jasper moved to Edward's door and knocked before opening it. "Bella?" he called, stepping into the room. "Everything alright, darlin'?" He asked, stepping over things that hadn't been scattered on the floor before. He was getting worried that Bella had taken ill suddenly and had stumbled through the room in a quest for Edward's private bath.

He hadn't expected to see Bella backed up against the wall, brown eyes wide with fear, a figure decked out in blue pimp clothes pinning her to the wall with his arms.

* * *

Cliffhangers aren't written to frustrate readers, but to generate a desire to come back and see how it gets resolved. ^_^ Any guesses as to who's with Bella?


	14. Chapter 13: Living Room Campouts

So, two major questions are answered here: who was with Bella and what's up with Alice's girlfriend, Kate.

Thanks as always to everyone who takes the time to leave me a note in a review. You guys rock.

Naelany and wishingforlove get kudos for hand holding and catching my odd grammar quirks.

* * *

"So, Edward, I'm very disappointed," Alice started after Jasper had disappeared back into the house.

"Oh yes?" Edward responded, fighting his smile. He had a feeling he knew where this was going. She smacked him on the shoulder and he laughed.

"I didn't get to play match maker," she pouted. "You two figured it out all on your own."

Edward laughed again and hugged her with an arm around her shoulders, careful not to harm her wings. "I'm sorry I ruined your fun, Alice," he said somewhat sincerely.

"I know you are, but I'm happy for you," she said with a bright smile. "Maybe you're finally growing up, huh?"

"Could be," Edward mused. "Or maybe I just finally found the right person."

Alice giggled and kissed his cheek lightly. "So, are you all official yet?"

"Mmhm," Edward agreed. "The b-word was mentioned this evening."

"Bottom?" Alice teased, nudging him in the ribs. "Bitch?"

Edward rolled his eyes but laughed. "Boyfriend."

"Oh, Edward," Alice said with a smile. "Are you happy?"

He nodded. "I am. Really and truly."

"Do you love him?"

Edward let out a slow breath. "I don't know, Ali," he said quietly. "I know my life is better with him in it. I like being around him. I care very deeply about him, but I'm not sure that I love him. We've barely known each other a month."

Alice smiled and took his hand. "You'll figure it out. No one says you have to fall head over heels for someone right away. Sometimes it just takes time."

Edward nodded, returning the smile and giving her hand a squeeze. "Now, what's up with you and Kate? We haven't seen her for awhile."

Alice's smile faded and she shrugged. "I think we're drifting apart. We want different things, and I think we've gotten to a point where some things have gotten more important than our relationship. We're supposed to be meeting for brunch tomorrow to talk."

Edward gave her another hug and kissed her temple. "I'm sorry."

Alice shrugged again. "I think I saw it coming. We weren't really meant to be together that long, though I'd hoped..."

"Still," Edward said. "That doesn't mean it can't hurt."

Alice nodded. "We'll see what happens tomorrow. For now, we've got a party to get back to!" She jumped up from her seat, enthusiasm painted on her face.

"Yes, ma'am," Edward said, using his cane to help him rise from the seat and extending his arm to Alice. They went back inside and headed toward the kitchen, Alice to oversee the spread, Edward to find Jasper. They found Esme, pink cheeked and smiling as she poured a bag of ice over the buckets of drinks. Edward grabbed a cookie from the tray and kissed his mom on the cheek. "Have you seen Jasper?"

"He went upstairs, love," Esme answered. "I think he's gone to pour ice water over Emmett and Rosalie."

Alice giggled and Edward grinned.

"What's so funny?" Emmett asked, entering the kitchen and reaching for two bottles of water. He handed one to Rosalie, who's hair was slightly askew but otherwise looked completely composed.

"And where have you two been?" Esme asked mock sternly.

"The pool shed," Emmett said with a shrug as a crash sounded from upstairs.

"If Jasper went looking for you, but you're here…" Alice asked, interrupted by another thudding crash.

"Shit," Emmett swore and as a group they headed for the stairs.

Before they could get the baby-gate removed to get upstairs, a body dressed in blue came tumbling down with a grunt.

"Call the police," Jasper called down from the top of the stairs, breathing heavily, blood trickling from his nose and the corner of his mouth. "Report an assault and attempted rape," he said as he stalked down the stairs.

Edward saw Alice scramble away toward the kitchen, their cell phones all upstairs. The figure against the barrier at the base of the stairs groaned and shifted, collapsing the gate and spilling the crumpled body at Emmett's feet.

"Bella's upstairs," Jasper said quietly to Esme, Edward, and Rosalie. "Stay with her until the cops get here. Emmett, help me take out the trash."

"Sure," Emmett agreed, nudging the figure over with his ninja sandal and he swore. "Fucker, I thought we told you to stay gone," he said into James' face.

"He don't listen too good," Jasper drawled and Edward saw red. He had known something was going to happen at the party.

Once Emmett and Jasper had lifted a mostly-limp James, Esme and Rose stepped around the boys and ran up the stairs. Edward hesitated, wanting to make sure Bella was alright but more wanting to kick the shit out of James for not only attacking Bella, but violating his parents' home to do so.

"Go," Alice said, nudging him. "We'll stay with Bella," she said, still on the cordless landline phone with the local police.

Edward nodded and took off after his brother and his boyfriend, James stumbling along between them as the crowd of people parted for them to get to the front door.

"What's going on, boys?" Carlisle asked from where he was manning the candy dishes for kids, who had mostly stopped coming as it got late.

"Troublemaker," Jasper said tersely.

"You might want to start breaking up the party, dad," Emmett said. "Cops will be here soon, and I'm sure Bella won't appreciate the scene."

"Understood," Carlisle said with a nod. "Where's Bella?"

"Edward's room," Jasper answered, his voice still hard. "The girls are with her."

Edward followed as Jasper and Emmett led James out to the front lawn, where they unceremoniously dropped him into the grass.

"Edward?" Jasper asked softly.

"Yeah?"

"Cigarette?"

Edward silently handed over his pack and the lighter from where he'd secreted them within his shirts. Emmett loomed over James, as if daring him to try to get away while Jasper lit up and took a few steps away, obviously trying to calm himself down.

"What are you doing here, James?" Edward asked, trying to force himself to stay calm.

"I wanted to see Bella," James pretty much growled. "Bitch isn't returning my calls."

"Watch it," Emmett grumbled, a threatening look on his face. "That 'bitch' is like my baby sister."

"Fuck off," James muttered.

"You're awfully cocky for someone who just had his ass kicked," Emmett mused. "And a cop who's about to find himself surrounded by a bunch of people who really don't like cops."

"Whatever," James said with a roll of his eyes, but something in the way he was holding himself told Edward that Jasper had hurt him more than James was letting on. "I won't even see the inside of a holding cell and she won't dare press charges against me."

"Wanna bet?" Jasper piped up, shooting James a dark look.

Before James could reply, two police cruisers pulled up the drive, and four officers emerged. "Someone called in an assault and attempted rape?"

"Yes," Jasper answered, tossing his spent cigarette onto the walk and crushing it out with his boot before picking it up and tucking it into a pocket.

"This the victim?" One of the officers, his name tag read 'Shelby' asked.

"No. The victim is Isabella Swan, my father can show you the way," Edward said, waving toward Carlisle who was at the door, thanking guests as they left. Shelby and his partner headed toward the house.

"I'm Detective Hunter," James growled out. "My ID is in my pocket." He started to move.

"Don't move," one of the other officers ordered and stooped near James, reaching into his pocket and retrieving his identification. "Alright. Someone want to tell me what happened here?"

"I came by to see my girlfriend," James started.

"Ex-girlfriend, Officer Jones," Jasper added. "And he was _not_ invited to this party."

Jones nodded, taking out his notebook. "Continue, Detective."

"Like I said, I came by to see my girlfriend, who hasn't been answering my calls lately. I was looking for her in the party and when I saw her go upstairs, I followed her, wanting to find someplace quiet where we could talk. We chatted for a few minutes and we were about to get intimate when this jarhead showed up and started punching on me."

"Uh-huh," Jones said, taking down some notes. "You're a Marine?" Jones turned to Jasper to get his statement.

"Not anymore," Jasper responded. "Sgt. Jasper Whitlock once upon a time, now Dr. Whitlock," Jasper introduced himself. "I'm sorry, my ID is in my other clothes," he said with a wry smirk, gesturing to his period costume.

Edward couldn't help but sigh a little in relief that Jasper was back in control of himself.

"We'll get to that, Dr. Whitlock. Can you please tell me what happened?"

"Five weeks ago, I came across Detective Hunter verbally berating Dr. Swan in the office we share on campus at Forks Academy. I intervened and warned him off of contacting her further. I had no idea he'd been calling her recently.

"One of the hosts of the party asked me to retrieve more beer from the basement, and on my way down, I thought I saw someone go upstairs, but paid it no mind, thinking it may have been Dr. Swan or one of the other guests seeking out another bathroom. After dropping off the beer in the kitchen, I heard a noise over the music and went upstairs to investigate.

"I found Detective Harper holding Dr. Swan against the wall. She was trying to fight him off, but he's significantly bigger than she is. Her dress was torn and she looked to have been crying, and there was a bruise forming along her jawline."

Edward growled softly and would have whacked James upside the head with his cane if Emmett hadn't stopped him, a furious expression on his face. Edward knew that Emmett wasn't mad at him, but at the sorry excuse for the man sitting on the grass in front of them.

"I admit to tackling Detective Hunter to the floor to get him away from Dr. Swan. I disarmed him and we fought and eventually I got him down the stairs-"

"He threw me down the stairs," James interrupted.

"And we had someone call the police and we escorted him outside," Jasper finished.

"You have his sidearm?" Jones asked, extending his hand.

Jasper nodded and reached into the waistband of his trousers, presenting the gun. "The clip is upstairs."

Jones checked the chamber anyway. "My partner is getting Dr. Swan's statement. In the meantime, do you require medical assistance?" Jones asked.

Jasper declined and Edward watched James' internal debate.

"My father's a doctor," Emmett spoke up. "He can look him over and decide if an ambulance is necessary."

Jones nodded, waving the other uniformed officer over.

Edward watched as people started leaving. Everyone on campus knew what had happened between Bella and James, so Edward counted it strangely fortunate that everyone at the party knew something of the history between those involved.

"Officer Mitchell is going to stay here," Jones said. "I need to check with my partner. No one leaves." He disappeared into the house and Carlisle appeared a moment later with the bag he kept in his study.

"Jasper, are you alright?" Carlisle asked, kneeling in front of James. "You're bleeding."

"No, I'm fine," Jasper answered, swiping at his nose and lip with his hand.

Edward took the wipes his father handed him and limped over to where Jasper was standing several feet away from James. It was almost like Jasper was afraid he was going to go after James again if he stayed too close. "Here," he said softly, opening the packets of antiseptic towelettes, giving one to Jasper so he could wipe his hands while Edward used another to gently clean the dried and drying blood from his face. "You sure you're okay?" he asked quietly.

Jasper nodded tightly. "I bit my lip when he hit me, and Bella caught me in her flailing."

Edward ran his fingers lightly over Jasper's jaw, watching him flinch when he caught a tender area. "Sorry."

"Is alright," Jasper answered.

Edward balled up the used wipes when he was finished and looked back over his shoulder where his dad was looking over James. "How badly did you kick his ass?" He asked quietly.

"Not nearly enough," Jasper all but growled. "I was just trying to get him away from Bella and get some help, but it wouldn't surprise me if he has a couple broken ribs."

"He doesn't look that bad."

Jasper's smile was grim. "Hitting someone in the face isn't very smart. It does more damage to the person hitting."

Edward smirked.

"He'll need to go to the hospital," Carlisle advised Mitchell, drawing Edward's attention. "I can't tell here if he's got any internal bleeding."

Mitchell nodded and used his radio to call for an ambulance while Carlisle packed up his bag and rose. "I'm going to check on Bella," Carlisle said.

Under Mitchell's supervising gaze, the four men remained quiet while waiting for Jones' return. Edward wanted to break the silence, but small talk was wholly inappropriate, and he knew Jasper wasn't in the mood for speaking.

Fortunately, they didn't have to wait long as Jones and the two other officers came back outside. James was helped to stand and escorted to the ambulance that had arrived in the driveway. Jones took Edward and Emmett's less than useful statements and gave Jasper his card, in case he remembered anything else.

"What's going to happen with Detective Hunter?" Edward asked.

"We'll hold him tonight, to keep Dr. Swan secure in her sense of safety," Jones said. "I'm sure the DA will want to move forward with charges, but we won't be able to do anything until Monday. I gave Dr. Swan the information she'll need to secure a restraining order if she wishes, and told her someone else would be in contact likely for more information. You as well, Dr. Whitlock."

Jasper nodded.

"Thank you," Edward told the officer.

Jones nodded. "Here's your report number," he said, scribbling it down on the back of another card he handed to Edward. "It may not be easy, but enjoy the rest of your night."

Edward said another thanks, and Jones climbed back into his cruiser with his partner and the followed after the ambulance, the second car going off in another direction.

"We should get back inside," Emmett said after they'd watched the taillights round the corner.

"Sure," Edward agreed. "Jasper?"

"Go on," he said quietly. "I'll be in in a minute."

Edward reached for Jasper's hand and gave it a gentle tug.

The smile he got in return didn't quite reach Jasper's eyes, but Edward could understand his need for a bit of space and time. Edward nodded and let him go, limping after Emmett back into the house.

It was disturbingly quiet in the house after the chaos of the party and it took a moment for Edward to adjust. He could hear the floor creak softly as other members of his family moved around upstairs.

"So little brother," Emmett started. "Living room camp out?"

"Yeah," Edward agreed with a small tight smile. "I'll grab the linens."

Emmett nodded and moved toward the basement door to drag up the television they'd relocated earlier in the day.

Edward went up to the linen closet on the lower level for the blankets and spare pillows that his mother stored for when they had guests. It took him a few trips, but he hauled everything to the living room, dropping it in an untidy pile so it wouldn't be in Emmett's way when he came up with the television. He also grabbed cushions from the furniture and considered going after the beanbags in the basement, but decided if someone wanted them, they could get one for themselves.

He went into the kitchen next and started assembling the leftover snacks onto several trays for easy munching and listened to Emmett wrestle the t.v. back into place.

"What're you doing, son?" Carlisle asked, leaning on the doorjamb into the kitchen.

"Emmett and I thought a campout might be a good idea for tonight. He's hooking the TV back up and I'm getting snacks and such organized. Jasper needed a few minutes," he said. "How's Bella?"

"She will be okay. He only hit her once, which is one time too many. She's going to have a nice bruise on her jaw, but otherwise she's okay." Carlisle looked tired. "I never saw him come in."

Edward sighed. "I'm pretty sure he didn't come in through the front door. There've been people going in and out the back all night."

"Good point," Carlisle agreed. "Do you need anything, Edward?"

"No," Edward said with a shake of his head. "Not right now. I half anticipated staying over, so I've got my pills in my bag if I need them."

Carlisle nodded. "Alright. I'm going to let your mom and the girls know what's going on and I'll join the rest of you boys in a few minutes."

"Thanks, Dad." Edward went back to consolidating the leftover food, checking the fridge for anything that might not have been set out during the party.

When he carried one full tray into the living room, he saw that the TV had been hooked back up and Emmett had dragged the coffee table into the middle of the room. "Thanks, Em," Edward said, sliding the tray onto the table.

"Sure, bro. Is there more food?" Emmett asked.

"Three more trays," Edward answered and Emmett went into the kitchen, leaving Edward to sort through the pile of blankets and pillows to keep from fidgeting.

"Hey," Jasper spoke up quietly. "What's all this?"

"Living room campout," Edward answered. "I'm not sure anyone will want to leave Bella alone tonight."

"Hm," Jasper agreed. "Good plan."

"Of course," Emmett boasted, carrying the remaining three trays. "It was mine."

Edward smirked and even Jasper managed a small smile.

"The girls have moved into the guest room, Edward, if you and Jasper would like to change," Carlisle spoke from the base of the stairs. "They're getting changed out of their costumes and thought the slumber party was a good idea."

"Thanks, Dad," Edward answered as Carlisle disappeared down the hall toward his own bedroom. "Jasper?" Edward asked, holding out his hand.

Jasper nodded and took Edward's hand lightly, and Edward led him upstairs. Their bags were still against the wall where they'd left them, having planned on spending the night, anticipating the party to run late into the evening.

"Are you okay?" Edward asked quietly, recognizing Jasper's own withdrawal from their previous encounter with James. He also knew that Jasper had to be reliving some of his own memories.

Jasper nodded and sat on the bed, his head bowed and his hands dangling between his thighs. "Yeah. I'm just glad I was in the right place again."

Edward sat down next to him and felt Jasper lean into him as Edward's arm went around his shoulders. They were quiet as they just sat together, Edward relieved that Jasper was alright after dealing with James (and a gun!) again, and he waited patiently while Jasper worked to put himself together again after the initial anger had passed.

When he heard footsteps on the stairs Edward shifted, sliding from the bed to retrieve their bags so they could change. Edward changed into flannel sleep pants and a t-shirt, then stole the hoodie from Jasper's bag. He also took out his contacts and slipped his glasses back on. Jasper tugged on sweats and a long sleeved t-shirt, and Edward caught a brief glance of scars on his chest and back before the shirt covered everything up. He hadn't noticed them when they'd changed into their costumes, but pushed the questions they brought up to the back of his mind. It wasn't the time or place.

"Thank you," Jasper said softly, pulling Edward close before they headed downstairs. "For understanding."

Edward nodded and gave him a small smile, kissing him softly. "You're welcome," he breathed.

Jasper kissed him again a bit more passionately and Edward felt like he was absorbing relief, affection, and thankfulness that Jasper was projecting into the action. Jasper's hand was warm against his neck and when Jasper's tongue brushed against Edward's lips, he parted them, just a bit, allowing Jasper to control the kiss and press it just a bit deeper before they broke apart.

Edward smiled softly and brushed hair out of Jasper's eyes before kissing him again softly. "Shall we?"

Jasper nodded and followed behind Edward as they made their way downstairs to join the others for the sleepover.

Someone had dragged up the beanbag chairs and Esme apparently had asked Emmett to move the couch, since she and Carlisle were curled up on it, mugs in their hands.

"Are you going to be okay on the floor?" Jasper asked Edward quietly.

Edward nodded. "I'll be fine."

Alice was tucked up in a small ball at the end of the couch, her knees pulled to her chest and a mug clutched in her hands, the pompoms on the ends of the slippers Bella had made her sticking out over the edge of the couch. Rosalie and Emmett had put together their own little nest on the floor at Alice's end of the couch, Emmett still dressed in his black pajamas, though Rose had changed into a pair of flannel pants with a matching tank top.

Bella was mirroring Alice's pose in the middle of a pile of pillows and blankets on the floor near the middle of the couch. Her face had been scrubbed clean and her hair taken down, and in combination with the oversized hoodie and sweats, she looked closer to seventeen than her twenty-seven years.

"There's warm cider on the table," Esme offered from her position on the couch.

"Thanks, Mom," Edward answered, grabbing one before he settled on Bella's right. "What movie are we watching?"

Jasper easily stepped over Edward and Bella and sat on her left, and Edward smiled softly as Bella tucked herself against Jasper's side and his arm went over her shoulders. Edward wasn't left out, though. Bella reached for his left hand and tugged him closer, effectively sandwiching herself between them.

"Pride and Prejudice," Alice answered, sliding from the couch and plopping herself between Jasper and Rose, which led to a great big cuddle fest on the floor as she snuggled up to Jasper, and Rose embraced Alice.

"Which one?" Jasper asked, lifting his arm to let Alice get closer and letting his fingertips brush lightly against Edward's neck, just below his hairline.

Edward smiled and Bella turned her head and beamed up at him. "1995."

"Ah. The good one, then," Jasper teased, which significantly helped to lighten the atmosphere of the room.

Edward knew that they would need to talk about it, but for the moment, his family just needed to be together and be grateful they were all okay. Bella seemed alright, and he only hoped that his mother, Alice, and Rosalie had already talked through everything with her and that she'd be somewhat comforted to know that James was going to be locked up for the night.

Emmett jumped up to make sure the door was locked and dimmed the lights while Carlisle manned the remotes and got the movie started.

Alice dozed off before they swapped dvds, and Carlisle and Esme excused themselves at that point, handing the remotes off to Emmett. Warm and content to be surrounded by his family, Edward dropped into sleep sometime after Lydia ran off with Whickham.

Edward woke slowly to the smell of coffee and bacon, and strawberries. He frowned as he opened his eyes to a curtain of brown and gold, and something firm yet soft in his arms. He shifted, wincing as parts of his body protested having slept on the floor, but smiled at what he saw. Sometime during the night, Bella had crawled into Jasper's lap and curled up into a tight ball, her head against his chest. Jasper had slipped from his sitting-up position, but was still propped up against the couch, and the colors Edward had woken up to were the result of their hair in his face. Edward had somehow slid into Bella's previous place at Jasper's side and had nestled up against him, tucked under one arm.

He heard giggles and looked around. Edward blinked blearily for a moment until he saw his glasses sitting next to his prescription bottles on the coffee table. He slipped his glasses back on and finally spotted Alice behind a camera.

"So cute!" she whispered.

Edward rolled his eyes and settled back against Jasper. "Go away, Alice," he muttered.

"Nope!" she said, quietly cheerful. "Esme told me to get you up."

"Did not." Edward responded with a pout.

"Did so," Alice shot back. "C'mon lazies," she called quietly, trying to wake Bella and Jasper, apparently. "Everyone else is up."

"Give us a few?" Edward asked when neither Bella or Jasper showed any signs of consciousness.

"Sure." She ruffled his hair and stepped away, looking through the pictures on her camera and muttering to herself.

Edward remained where he was for a few more minutes, soaking up the warmth radiating from Bella and Jasper's bodies under the blankets they were sharing. He finally sat up slowly with a soft sigh, working the kinks out of his body as best he could.

"Jas," he said softly into his boyfriend's ear, fingers lightly combing through the hair at the nape of his neck. Edward lightly nuzzled the soft patch of skin below Jasper's ear. "Jas?" he asked a bit louder.

"Hm?" Jasper's head turned toward Edward, and his blue eyes blinked open slowly.

"Good morning," Edward greeted him softly.

"Mornin'" Jasper responded, his voice still thick and rough with sleep, but he smiled softly. His arm tightened briefly around Edward's waist and his nose brushed over Edward's temple.

Alice interrupted the moment by appearing with a glass of juice and two mugs in her hands. She set one mug on the table, handed the other to Jasper and gave Edward the juice before handing him his pill bottles. He decided which he needed and took it with the juice, handing everything back and accepting the coffee.

"Thanks, Alice."

She smiled and nodded. "I'll be right back with tea," she warned and went back to the kitchen.

"Bella, darlin'," Jasper spoke quietly, rubbing her back.

Edward was surprised she'd slept through the night. Alice had said she'd had nightmares the nights following James' last visit to campus and the violation of her space at his parents' house he assumed would have been more traumatic.

Bella stirred and nuzzled herself deeper into Jasper's embrace, earning a quiet chuckle from them both. Bella was not exactly what Edward would call a morning person.

Edward reached up and brushed some hair from her face, speaking quietly. "Bella, it's time to wake up. Esme's got breakfast, and you know Emmett's not very patient when it comes to food."

She shook her head slightly and mumbled a quiet "No." She wriggled around a bit and Jasper let out a quiet moan, biting his lip and Bella's eyes flew open.

Edward bit his lip to contain his laughter as Bella tried to scramble away from Jasper but after shifting her off his lap he held her tight, not letting her flee in her embarrassment, her face flushed a pretty pink, yet still bearing traces of sleepiness.

"Oh, God, Jasper, I'm so sorry, I didn't mean to fall asleep on you and then I just – oh, God," she moaned, dropping her head into her hands.

Jasper laughed softly and gave her a hug before releasing her. "No worries, darlin'. No harm done, alright? I'm just glad you felt safe enough to sleep with me last night." He kissed the crown of her head.

At his words, Bella flushed again. Edward laughed quietly as Alice reappeared with another mug, handing it to Bella, sitting next to him on the floor against the couch. Alice sat behind her and started combing through Bella's hair with her fingers, and Bella relaxed minutely.

Jasper excused himself and headed upstairs while Edward struggled to his feet and onto the couch to sit next to Alice. After a moment, Bella rose smoothly and joined them, plopping herself down between Edward and Alice and giving Edward a half-hug.

"I didn't meant to molest your boyfriend this morning," she apologized quietly.

"Like he said, no harm done," Edward said with a smile. He kissed her temple, not questioning her knowledge on the status of his relationship with Jasper, knowing she'd spent enough time with Alice the previous evening for it to come out, probably as a way to cheer her up. "How're you feeling this morning?"

Bella seemed to ponder the question for a moment. "Sore," she said eventually.

Edward waited, knowing she'd purposefully misunderstood his question.

She sighed softly and tucked her hair behind her ears while Alice snuggled up against her, uncharacteristically quiet. "I'm…upset. I'm angry and a bit scared that he's going to come back. I'm furious that he had the nerve to come here during a party and try something. I'm relieved that he spent at least the night in jail and that Jasper was once again in the right place. And I feel a bit guilty that he had to rescue me again because I couldn't defend myself."

"Now, you stop that talk right now," Jasper said quietly, but sternly. "You shouldn't have to defend yourself against someone who claims to care for you. If you truly want to learn, I can teach you, or help you find a self-defense class, but you don't need to put yourself down or feel guilty for what happened." He had changed into his jeans and a different long sleeved t-shirt and was barefoot when he crossed the floor in his long stride to crouch in front of Bella.

Bella nodded, unconvinced. Jasper sighed, balancing himself with one hand on the couch, which Edward silently covered with his own, adding his support.

"I know it will take you awhile to believe this, Bella, but none of this was your fault," Jasper counseled softly, giving Edward's fingers a squeeze. "You cannot blame yourself for James' behavior."

"I know," Bella answered. "But it's so hard… I should have stood up for myself."

"Can I tell you a story?" Jasper offered, shifting to sit, his left side against the couch, facing Bella. He didn't seem to notice, or acknowledge, the appearance of the rest of the family who had streamed in from the kitchen.

Bella nodded and Jasper took a slow breath before he began. "I was in an abusive relationship when I was in high school," he began. "My lover was very controlling and he eventually started hitting me. I defended myself, physically, and it did absolutely no good; it only made him angrier. So, sometimes being able to defend yourself isn't necessarily a good thing. With someone like that, like James, or Darryl, when you push back and test their ability to control their environment, it just makes things worse."

"But I shouldn't have let it get so far," Bella said. "He said hurtful things, but I thought it was just because things at work were so bad and he was stressed. It took me a long time to realize he was trying to control me," Bella said softly.

"Why didn't you ever say anything, love?" Edward asked softly. "We would have found some way to help you."

"I thought maybe it was a phase," Bella answered, looking down at her hands. "When he asked me to stop spending so much time with you guys, I thought maybe he was just jealous and insecure and that we'd work it out eventually. It never occurred to me that he passed up every chance to spend time with all of us to get to know you." She shook her head lightly. "All the comments about my weight, about how he thought you were bad influences on me…I just let him keep heaping them on."

"Why did you?" Edward found himself asking quietly, his hand moving to Jasper's shoulder.

"I thought he loved me," Bella answered quietly. "And I was tired of being alone. Everything was fine at first. I couldn't figure out why someone like him would be interested in someone like me, but he was there and he made me feel _wanted_," she whispered. "Even when he was putting me down, I told myself he only said those things because he cared about me and wanted me."

They all knew she'd been alone a long time. Her mother had died of cancer when she was in high school, just after she'd re-married and Bella had gone to live with her father. Her dad had been killed in the line of duty just a few months after she'd started college.

"Oh, honey," Alice whispered on Bella's other side. "We want you."

Bella sniffled lightly and Edward could tell she was fighting back tears. "Not like James wanted me," Bella clarified. "I couldn't ask for a better family, but James didn't look at me like his best friend, or his little sister," she said, hugging Alice. "He wanted me as a woman, and that was something I hadn't really had before. It felt good to be wanted. It started so slowly I didn't really notice. And then I thought that it was just the way things had to be."

"It never has to be that way," Jasper said. "No one deserves to be controlled and manipulated. Someday you'll find someone that will truly treasure you darlin', don't doubt that," Jasper said quietly offering her a small smile and squeezing her knee lightly. "And you're not alone. You've got this fantastic family that was willing to take both of us lost souls in, and they're not going to let you go."

"No, we're not," Edward echoed and leaned over to embrace her as well.

Bella sniffled again and wiped away the few tears that traced over her cheeks. She nodded tightly and melted into Edward's arms.

"Come now," Esme spoke up from across the room, Carlisle's arms wrapped around her waist while she brushed a few of her own tears away. "Breakfast is ready and getting cold."

"Food!" Emmett hollered, breaking the somber atmosphere in the room causing everyone to chuckle. Rosalie smacked him on the back of the head and led him into the dining room.

Bella slid off the couch and crossed to Esme, letting herself be enfolded into another embrace. Edward could see his mother speaking but couldn't hear the words as Carlisle tucked Bella's hair back and kissed her forehead. Alice bounced off the couch as well, following after Rose and Emmett, leaving Jasper and Edward alone.

Jasper rose from his position on the floor and offered Edward a hand up off the couch, which he accepted. "Do you still feel like a lost soul?" Edward asked his boyfriend quietly.

"Not as much anymore," Jasper answered after a heartbeat. "I'm finally beginning to feel like I have a home."

"Yeah?" Edward met Jasper's blue eyes and found himself captivated.

Jasper just nodded and kissed Edward lightly before tugging him toward the kitchen.

* * *

So, no offense to anyone who likes the more recent Kiera Knightly P&P. For me, P&P will always be Colin Firth and Jennifer Ehle.

The next two chapters that come are mini chapters (on purpose this time), so I'll likely be posting a bit sooner than next Thursday, depending on how things go.


	15. Chapter 14: Mini Chapter: Bella

This mini-chapter gives you a peek inside Bella's head.

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It was a week after Halloween before Bella had a chance to sit down and reflect on the path her life had recently taken. Sunday, everyone had been pretty reluctant to let her out of their sight, and for once, she didn't mind. She'd been surrounded once again by her surrogate family and she reveled in the love, if not so much the attention.

Fortunately, word of James' latest attack hadn't reached the students, who were all still focused on talking about their own Halloween party. The week passed in a flurry of essays and exams, and Friday after dinner, Bella begged off everyone's company to return to her room and curl up with a bottle of wine, a couple of movies, and the next crocheted Christmas gift on her list.

She hadn't been too surprised when they didn't protest her need for an evening alone. Jasper and Edward had plans to hit a jazz bar off campus, Emmett and Rose were off to the football game, and Alice was oddly quiet about her evening's plans, but had promised to meet Bella for brunch and shopping the next morning. Bella tried not to feel hurt about everyone being coupled off, because she was really mostly very happy for Edward and Jasper.

After having witnessed Edward's mood swings for two years, it was nice to see him mostly happy and with someone he could get close to. While he was one of Bella's best friends, she knew there were things he held back from her, which she really couldn't blame him for. He was a very private person, but Jasper seemed to be drawing him back out.

As she added a couple rows of scraps to the afghan she was putting together for Emmett, Bella smiled softly at the way Edward and Jasper acted together, and with her. Both were fiercely protective of her, and she had to admit to having a slight crush on them both, but chalked it up to hero worship. Jasper was the ever polite southern gentleman, though she'd seen his dangerous side and wouldn't like to know it much closer. Edward…Bella was sure she'd been half in love with Edward since she met him, but would never do anything about it, because he was Edward. She'd known of his reputation before meeting him at school, and though his accident had slowed him down, she didn't want to get caught up in that kind of relationship.

She'd been as gentle as possible when she'd turned down his proposition, about a year and a half previous. Bella had known enough about him through her growing relationship with Alice that she'd understood his pursuit of her to be a fling, and that wasn't something she was looking for at the time. Edward had seemed to understand her desire to be friends, and she was glad, because she couldn't ask for a better one. Sure, Alice and Rose were great girlfriends, but sometimes Bella didn't want to be a girl, and Edward, when he wasn't being an asshole, was a damn good friend. Jasper was proving to be as well. He fit right into the middle of her adopted family.

The Cullens were a welcomed surprise when Bella first started at Forks Academy, and she'd reached a point where she couldn't imagine her life without them. When she'd arrived to move in, Esme had greeted her with a warm hug and invited her to dinner with her family that evening, knowing from her personnel file that she had no family in the area. She'd been welcomed instantly by everyone but Edward, but Bella had quickly learned that the Edward she'd met that first night wasn't the real Edward. She'd gotten an instant best friend in Alice and older brother in Emmett, and for the first time in a long time, she'd felt like she had a home.

It had taken Jasper's reminder of that on Sunday morning to make her realize just how grateful she was for the Cullens' presence in her life. She knew that they loved her, and she'd been blind to their worry and concern when James' attitude had changed. She hadn't really been alone, she'd just let herself believe that. Bella had had her share of boyfriends in college, and though she'd slept with only a couple, the way James had made her feel at first brought out a whole different side of herself that Bella hadn't known before. Even though James never thought she was pretty enough, for the first time that she could remember, while she was with James, she _felt_ beautiful and sexy, because he wanted her. Unfortunately, Bella had mistaken that lust for love and when the verbal abuse and control over her life began, she allowed it.

One good thing had come out of the end of her relationship with James, and that was the plot for her next novel. Her publisher had given Izzy a deadline of August 31 for a draft of the latest Arbiter novel, and Bella felt secure that she'd be able to meet it, even with classes. She thought she might even have a good preview for when Izzy "visited" campus in the spring. She'd already outlined the novel for the most part and was now working on filling in each chapter as inspiration came to her. At the moment, she was being particularly cruel to her heroine's lead guard, but he deserved it.

Sometimes it still amused Bella that she had a secret identity. But she'd had her first novel published before she finished her B.A. and hadn't wanted to get derailed from her studies to earn her doctorate. Once she'd completed her Ph.D. she'd considered dropping the ruse, but Izzy was successful and so Bella had continued to publish the series under that moniker. The publishing had allowed her the credibility to teach creative writing, while her doctorate allowed her to teach literature, giving her the best of both professional worlds. It was tradition for Izzy to visit the campus each spring as part of a colloquium with whatever other professional authors Bella could encourage to join her, and it was a pretty popular event, drawing people onto campus from the surrounding community.

Bella finished off the row she was working on and folded the ugly looking blanket, setting it aside until she had more scraps to work with. She thought Emmett would appreciate it. Bella rose and carried her empty wine glass into the kitchenette and topped it off, grabbing the tub of gummy bears from her side of the cabinet while she was in there. Her suitemate's side of the room was dark; Becky's father was ill and she'd gone home to visit nearly every weekend she wasn't on call since the term began.

Wine refilled and snacks in hand, Bella returned to her bed and movie. She settled down to get comfortable and pulled out the pretty lime-green yarn she'd selected for Esme and resumed working on the fingerless gloves that would match the hat and scarf she'd already made, and let the movie take her away.

* * *

I'll post another mini-chapter on Thursday, and the next full chapter should be posted on Sunday.

Fair warning; no sneak peek in reviews this week. Y'all have to wait until Sunday, or check out the blog. ^_^


	16. Chapter 15: Mini Chapter: Veterans Day

Jasper's turn for a mini-chapter, because I wanted this to stand alone.

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Jasper woke to his alarm on Wednesday, November 11 with an odd sense of peace and foreboding. School was cancelled for the day for the Veterans Day holiday, and Jasper had plans that he'd not told anyone about. He wasn't sure he wanted company for the day, and he knew he didn't have the willpower to turn anyone down when they offered. So he just hadn't said anything about where he was going.

He showered and dressed, spending a few minutes looking longingly at the garment bag hanging at the back of his wardrobe. Jasper nearly pulled it out; it was within his rights to wear either one of the remaining uniforms for a Veterans Day celebration, but he wasn't sure he _could_. For years, he'd largely avoided seeking out other vets for the holiday, preferring to pretend, like so many other Americans, that it was just another random federal holiday where he had no responsibilities. But finally something in his life felt different, and when he'd learned of the local celebration, he'd decided to attend. After staring at the bag for several moments, he couldn't even bring himself to open it. Instead, he dressed in charcoal gray slacks and a white shirt with his sport coat. It was a dreary day by the look of things out his window, so he also grabbed a scarf and his gloves.

Jasper grabbed a quick breakfast in the dining hall then strode off to his car. The celebration would be starting at the court house at eleven, and he thought he could spend some time looking around the down town area while he was there.

When he reached the court house, there were people setting up chairs and checking a sound system. He noted another set of chairs backed up to the courthouse steps and remembered that a local community group of musicians would be performing as part of the celebration. He wandered down the street and found a cafe and ordered a cup of coffee. Jasper took his time walking back, pausing to look in storefronts and get a better feel for the town. He hadn't realized he'd begun to feel like he was living in bubble on campus. When he returned to the courthouse, members of the band had begun to arrive and set up. Jasper hung back along the sidewalk, observing as people began to arrive and greet each other.

He still wasn't completely sure what had compelled him to attend the ceremony. Jasper largely disconnected himself from anything related his previous service; he had never sought out any of his benefits, other than his tuition (which he hadn't even needed, really). He felt oddly detached from everything going on around him as he watched. He nodded at a few people that greeted him, but remained standing alone, listening to the band warm up and tracking people as they arrived and mingled.

Eventually a color guard arrived and began to set up off to one side. He noted that it seemed most of the vets were dressed more like he was, with Veterans of Foreign Wars caps embroidered with details for each service man. There were some younger people in full uniform, and Jasper judged they were likely active duty or reservists. He felt more comfortable with his choice for not having worn his old uniform; he liked the anonymity his casual clothes provided him.

It wasn't long before the band began to play and people started filling into the arranged chairs. Jasper hung back to make sure everyone else had a seat before he took one of the chilly folded metal gray chairs. He sat back and listened as the band played a few pieces, narrated by the director, who introduced himself as the husband of an active duty army officer.

The ceremony itself wasn't long. The band played the national anthem after the color guard presented the colors. There were a couple of speakers and the band played a few more programmed pieces, one Jasper recognized as being from Saving Private Ryan, which was entirely appropriate, he thought. He listened carefully to the speakers and their words about service still resonated with him, over a decade after he'd first enlisted. If not for his discharge, he'd have thought about joining the Reserves; but one look at his service jacket and Jasper knew they'd politely decline his offer. He still felt a need to serve and he had no idea how any more. Perhaps if he ended up in Forks long term he'd find a way; Carlisle might be able to give him some ideas.

Jasper brought his attention back to the ceremony as an older veteran was awarded a service medal and spoke thoughtfully about his service. He cheered along with everyone else as the man was presented with his medal and certificate. He smiled when he heard that the man's reasons for joining the Air Force in the 50s were similar to Jasper's own when he graduated high school. The band played one last time, and the director invited people to stand when the theme for their branch of the service was played. Jasper hesitated only a heartbeat when the Marine Hymn began, and smoothly climbed to his feet.

It was only then that he caught a glimpse of a familiar head of hair, bronzed and wild and dancing a bit in the cool November breeze. Edward was standing off a bit, on the edges of the crowd in a long wool coat, leaning on his cane as he watched. Bella was tucked up against his right side in a navy blue peacoat over dark slacks, her hair tucked back behind her ears under a beanie that matched her coat and scarf. Jasper watched as Edward smiled softly when their eyes met, and he sat, losing sight of Edward when the piece transitioned to the next branch's theme.

When the piece was over, and everyone was thanked for coming, a bugler played taps before a 21 gun salute and the colors were taken down. An older veteran invited Jasper to the American Legion post, where a lunch was being hosted. Jasper smiled and thanked him graciously, and waited until he walked off to look around for Edward and Bella.

"I had a feeling this is where you might be today," Edward observed quietly from behind Jasper.

Jasper turned to face them. Though Edward was smiling his crooked smile, Jasper could see that his eyes looked somewhat haunted and sad and he had a feeling his own looked the same. Bella looked similarly haunted and she moved from Edward's side to Jasper's, wrapping her arm around his waist. He hugged her back. "I'm not sorry I didn't say anything," he confessed quietly. "I needed to do this on my own."

Edward nodded. "I understand." Jasper read sincerity in his expression. "We just wanted you to know that we were here, if you wanted…"

Jasper smiled softly. "I know, Edward." He brushed his left hand against Edward's right as he shifted, trying to be subtle in the company they were in. He pressed a kiss to the top of Bella's head. "They're having a lunch at the Legion post," he said. "Would you both like to come with me?"

Edward nodded again. "Sure."

"Of course, Jas," Bella said softly.

The Legion hall was within walking distance of the court house, and Edward, Bella and Jasper walked together in silence, Jasper lost in his thoughts of what everything said that morning meant to him. They spent the day with older veterans and current service men and women, listening to their stories. Jasper didn't talk much about his own service, but no one seemed to mind and Edward was just one of many civilians spending the afternoon with the veterans. Bella seemed to charm most of the older men by eagerly listening to all of their stories, taking notes in a small black notebook she'd pulled from within her coat.

They left in the early evening and walked back to the court house and their cars. Bella kissed Jasper on the cheek and asked Edward for his car keys so she could get warmed up.

"Thank you," Jasper said quietly to Edward as they lingered in the brisk breeze that had picked up.

Edward smiled softly, kissed Jasper quickly and lightly and said "Anytime," very softly.

Though Jasper knew he'd never truly be at peace with the way his military career had ended, he realized that maybe it would be okay to finally let it go, if he could bring himself to share the story with someone. As he walked to his car he thought about telling Edward everything, but the time didn't seem quite right, just yet. But soon, he knew, he'd be able to tell Edward what had happened, and why going to the service had been something he'd needed to do on his own.

He pulled his phone from where he'd left it in the console of his car and checked for messages. He saw one from everybody. Jasper thumbed through them, finding a mix of simple thanks from Emmett to a more poignant quote from Esme. They made him smile and reflect once more on how his fortunes had changed since arriving in Forks. He sent out a mass text message to everyone, inviting them to his room for pizza, beer, and brownies before calling ahead to place the orders for pizza and going home to his friends.

* * *

Honorably discharged members of the service may wear their uniforms for parades and services on national holidays in which active duty or reserve units are participating. Jasper has two uniforms left in his possession: Marine dress blues and the Service Uniform (wiki them for pictures). Jasper was discharged honorably.

This celebration is modeled on one I participate in every year as a member of an adult community band in my hometown. It's such a small thing, but we're glad we can do it and support our community. We play Hymn to the Fallen, from Saving Private Ryan, and it usually makes an impact. On the blog, I've embedded a recording from the soundtrack.

Next full chapter will post on Sunday.

I apologize for not replying to reviews;ff wouldn't let me. Hopefully it's fixed.


	17. Chapter 16: Alice Rose and Em oh my!

**My readers continue to rock my socks. Seriously. I loved hearing about how much the last chapter moved all of you. And I promise, that we'll hear Jasper's full story sometime very soon. But first, something else you've all been waiting for...  
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**Alice, Rosalie, and Emmett, Oh My!**

In the weeks following Halloween, Jasper found himself in the weird situation of being comfortably busy. His routine had become familiar and he was well settled into it. On top of his regular work load he had students asking for letters of recommendation for their college applications, which he was happy to provide, though he only knew his students for barely two months. He did what he could, however, drawing on what he knew about their extra-curricular activities along with their academic status in his classes.

There were three students he had to refer to the Dean for violating the student codes of conduct by cheating. They had turned in remarkably similar papers, and when confronted, they admitted to paying a student to write the papers for them. They had been suspended for three days and issued citations to serve twelve hours of community service by tutoring in the local public schools. The student who had written the papers was cited as well, and had admitted to making the papers similar enough to get her classmates caught. In addition to her own community service, she had to donate the money she'd made from the papers to a charity of her choice.

Jasper hadn't yet found the opportunity to speak to Edward about the way his military career ended. The timing never seemed to be right, and the few times they had some quiet time alone, Jasper lost the confidence he needed to confide in Edward. He knew that Edward would be nothing but supportive, but Jasper found he wasn't as willing to reopen that wound as he had thought. It ate at him, knowing he wasn't telling Edward the whole truth when Edward had opened up to him a month or more earlier about his accident. But Jasper also knew that he wouldn't be able to put the lid on everything he felt once he started speaking about it, and he couldn't in good conscience dump that all on Edward. So he held back, continuing to wait for the opportune moment.

His sleepless nights came and went, but for the most part he found himself, for the first time in a long time, getting full nights' sleep. However, two weeks after Halloween, Jasper had had a few short nights, having found himself unable to get to sleep. Friday night he and Edward stayed up watching a few movies until Edward had been dozing off and Jasper shuffled him off home when Edward refused to stay.

He finally fell asleep sometime around 3 am. He was jolted from sleep by a knock at the door. Jasper groaned softly as he glanced at the clock and saw it was 4 am before he rolled out of bed yawning. In his exhausted and half-awake state, he'd expected to see Emmett returning from Rosalie's locked out, or a sleepless Edward returning looking for company. But the person standing on the other side of the door hadn't even crossed his sleep fuzzed brain.

"Alice?"

"Can I come in, Jazzy?" she asked quietly.

"Yeah, sure," he answered, standing back and waving her in. "Can I get you anything?"

She looked even smaller, if it was possible, dressed not in the usual extravagant clothes he was used to seeing, but simple jeans, hoodie, and a pair of lime-green Chucks. Her short black hair was flat and there were dark circles under her eyes that Jasper hadn't noticed before, but then, it'd been a busy week and he hadn't seen much of her.

"Do you have any tea or cocoa?" She seemed almost hesitant to ask.

"I'll see if Emmett does if I don't," he answered. "But first," he said softly and stepped toward her, tugging her into the hug she looked like she needed. "Get comfy," he ordered after he released her. "I'll be right back."

Emmett did have some packets of cocoa mix in his side of the pantry, and Jasper stuck his two mugs into the microwave, half milk, half water. While it heated, he scrawled a note for Emmett about the beverage thievery and opened a package of graham crackers he'd picked up on impulse on one of his last shopping trips.

When Jasper emerged from the kitchenette, Alice was smooshed up in the corner of his bed, her socked feet flat on the mattress and her knees pulled up to her chest. Jasper handed her a mug and sat next to her on the bed, his back against the wall as he faced his closet. He watched as her hands curled around the mug. Taking in her posture, Jasper wrapped his right arm around her shoulders and pulled her close to him.

"What's up, darlin'?" he asked quietly, setting the packet of graham crackers between them on the bed. "You haven't been yourself this week." She'd been distant all week; even when she'd showed up for meals she hadn't really been there.

"Kate and I broke up on Sunday," she said quietly, staring into the mug as if it held the answers to the questions of the universe.

"I'm sorry," Jasper said honestly, hugging her a bit tighter. "Edward said he thought you might be splitting up."

Alice nodded. "We've been drifting apart for awhile now, having different goals that weren't really compatible with each other's. I can't say that I didn't see it coming, but…" she trailed off and took a sip from her cup.

"But what?" Jasper prompted gently.

"She was cheating on me," Alice admitted softly. "She'd been seeing this man, Garrett, while we were together. She decided that she loves him more than she loved me."

"Oh, honey," Jasper sighed.

"I loved her," Alice said through a sniffle. "We may have been growing apart, but I still loved her, and I thought maybe we could work through things. I thought maybe I could take fewer courses next term so that I would have time to spend in the studio and with her, or I could think about moving off campus with her. I was going to suggest couples counseling when we met for brunch on Sunday, but she never gave me the chance." She sniffled quietly again and Jasper released her just long enough to reach for the nearly-empty box of tissues that were sitting above his bed on the window ledge and handed them to her.

"What was she willing to do?" Jasper asked softly.

Alice shrugged one shoulder. "Dunno. We never really talked about it. I mean, I had offered to cut my course load this term, but she didn't want me to do that." She paused. "Oh," she said in a small voice, tears finally breaking free and running down her cheeks.

Jasper swore softly under his breath. He hadn't meant to make her cry, but he'd wanted to help her put things into a bit of perspective. He placed his mug onto the window ledge and shifted to fully embrace Edward's tiny cousin. "I'm sorry," he said softly and held her as she cried quietly.

It took just a few minutes for Alice to calm herself down. She straightened up and wiped her eyes with the palms of her hands with a lady-like sniffle. She used a tissue to clean herself up a bit.

"Thanks, Jasper," she whispered.

"Anytime, Alice," he responded. "Though can I ask…what are you doing out this late, and why me?" he asked gently. "We missed you at dinner tonight."

"I was at the studio, and I lost track of time," she answered. "I didn't want to bother Bella with everything she's got going on, and I thought maybe I'd find Edward here, and I could talk to both of you."

"Is that where you've been spending all your time lately?" Jasper asked. It'd been two weeks, roughly, since anyone had seen Alice for any length of time, besides at dinner the previous week.

Alice nodded. "It's a nice escape, and I have been getting stuff done."

"Are you sure you're not just hiding?" Jasper asked.

"I'm sure," Alice answered with a shake of her head. She took a deep breath and turned slightly so she was facing Jasper. "Everyone copes differently. Edward has that whole tortured musician thing going for him and he plays or writes music to deal with things. Bella writes or starts churning out baby blankets to donate to the hospital. Rose takes apart engines and Emmett lifts weights. I…do art."

Jasper looked down at her socks, black and green striped with spaces for each individual toe as she wiggled them. "Okay." Jasper kissed her forehead. "Just don't forget to take care of yourself. Or that we're here for you when you want to talk. We've missed you."

"I've missed you guys too, Jazzy," Alice said. "I've just needed some space. I'll be at dinner tonight."

"Good." He gave her another hug. "What are you doing today?"

"Bella's going to be my shopping buddy, and I'm supposed to meet her for brunch at 1."

"I believe I promised to model for you at some point. How about we go get some breakfast and then if you want, we can go back to your studio?" he offered.

Alice considered that for a moment. "Okay," she decided with a nod. "I don't know that I could get to sleep now anyway with the amount of caffeine I've already had."

Jasper smiled. "Alright. Let me get cleaned up a bit and get dressed and we'll go."

Alice nodded.

Jasper gave her another hug and slid off the bed, retrieving clean boxers, jeans, and a long-sleeved t-shirt from his bureau before padding into the bathroom to change. He washed his face quickly and combed his wet fingers through his hair, attempting to tame the soft curls into something not completely wild.

When he returned to his room, Alice had slipped back into her shoes and was sitting at his small table, flipping through a history text book he'd been reviewing earlier in the evening. Jasper pulled a sweater from the closet and stamped into his loafers. "Ready?" He scooped his wallet and keys from his table and held his arm out for Alice.

"Yup. I need pancakes," she said with a bright smile.

"Well, how does Edward's diner suit you?" Jasper asked as she wrapped her tiny hand around his elbow and snugged herself against his side.

"Perfect."

They made their way to Alice's car and set off toward the diner Jasper frequented with Edward. Jasper was somewhat surprised to see that Maggie wasn't there. He shouldn't have been, but it seemed like she was i_always_/i there.

When they were seated Jasper ordered coffee and Alice opted for orange juice while they studied the menu. When the waitress (Helen) returned with their drinks they were ready to order. Alice got a short stack of pancakes with eggs and bacon and Jasper ordered a ham and cheese scramble with toast and hash browns.

"So Alice," Jasper started, sipping his coffee. "Tell me how you got into teaching art."

Alice smiled and wriggled around a bit in the booth, trying to find a comfortable spot. "Hmm. Where to start," she mused. "My parents really aren't very artistic people," she began. "My dad's an economist and my mom's an auditor. They're pretty analytical people, though they've loosened up a bit over the years.

"They encouraged my art, even though they weren't very talented themselves. I actually studied design and fashion in school. Fashion design is a side activity – I mostly work with photography, pottery, and sculpture, though I paint and sketch when the mood hits."

Jasper nodded and sipped his coffee, easily settling back and listening to Alice talk.

"Anyway, I showed a few pieces in galleries when I was an undergrad, and sold a couple. I knew I couldn't live the starving artist lifestyle, and I didn't want to rely on my parents, so I went to grad school so I could teach community college but still have time to work in my studio. Emmett told me about the opening here, and the board hired me with my MFA because I'm still showing and selling pieces, which makes my practical experience more valuable than a doctorate."

"What are you working on right now?" Jasper asked as Helen brought over their food.

"A collection of formal wear designs, and I'm throwing a lot of pottery." Alice bounced lightly in her seat at the appearance of her food, and the excitement went up a little as she talked about her passions. "I'm also working on a collection of photos, but it's a bit slow going."

"What's the subject?" Jasper didn't know much about art, but he knew things usually followed a theme.

"Love and family," Alice answered, the sparkle returning to her eyes. "So if you see me lurking around with a camera…" she trailed off with a grin, taking a huge bite of her pancakes.

"Got it." Jasper responded to her grin with a wink. "How are you related to Emmett and Edward?"

Alice took a gulp of juice before answering. "Our moms are sisters," she said. "My parents live in the Midwest and travel a lot, so I spend a lot of time with Esme and Carlisle."

"You don't see them much?"

Alice shook her head. "They'll be around for Christmas, probably, since we're all out here. If they haven't decided to go on another cruise to someplace warm and sunny, that is," she said with a smile.

"Don't you miss them?" Jasper was intrigued with the way people who had family could be unbothered by not seeing them for long periods. He supposed that was because he'd been without his for so long.

"Sure, I miss them," she said with a shrug, licking syrup from her fork. "But they've retired and deserve to enjoy their time together now that they don't have to worry about me so much. They're always just a phone call away, and they've got one of those cute little notebook computers so we can Skype and email and Daddy's even on Facebook and Twitter now." She smiled. "They're just living life and I've got Carlisle and Esme and everyone here."

When she put it that way, Jasper supposed that it made sense. "I guess I hadn't thought about it that way."

"What about your family, Jas?"

Jasper fought to keep the shutters from closing over him like they usually did when the subject of his family came up. It was a bit easier than last time, when he'd told Edward, but it was still hard. "You guys are it," he said softly."My dad and baby sister – well, she was fourteen – were killed in a train accident when I was seventeen. The pickup stalled on the tracks and they couldn't get out in time." He'd been at swim practice and his dad was picking up supper because his mama hadn't been feeling well.

"Jasper that's terrible," Alice said softly, breaking him out of his thoughts, her eyes sad.

He nodded and drained his coffee. "Mama died of breast cancer while I was in the Corps. I got to see her at least, to say goodbye, but it was hard."

"How old were you?" Alice asked quietly.

"Not quite twenty," he answered. "I was discharged about six months later."

"Why were you discharged? I mean," Alice stammered. "You seem healthy and not violent or anything."

Jasper's smile was wry. "Don't Ask Don't Tell is equivalent to a medical discharge," Jasper explained. "Someone set me up," he answered succinctly. "I haven't managed to tell Edward the full story yet, so…" He hadn't told anyone the full story, really.

Alice nodded. "My curiously has been satisfied. Jeez, Jasper, no wonder you're so quiet and withdrawn sometimes. But after that, I can see how you and Edward bonded so quickly."

Jasper smiled as Helen refilled his coffee. "He's got a strength that I admire," he said quietly. "To come through what he has and still be able to go on and be mostly positive…" Jasper trailed off. "His strength and grace help me remember that I've not completely lost everything, and that if he can survive then I sure as fuck can."

Alice's smile came back. "You two are very good for each other. But you shouldn't downplay your own losses, Jasper."

He shrugged. "I've learned recently that it could have been very much worse. Maybe my first plan didn't work out, but I was able to move on and find a new career for myself." It took meeting Edward and his family, who had more than their fair share of small tragedies, to figure that out.

Alice slid out of her seat and rounded the table to sit next to Jasper. She cuddled up against him. "You are an awesome person, Jasper," she said simply before kissing his cheek.

"Thanks, darlin'," he answered, feeling his ears heat up a bit in embarrassment as he hugged her back.

Alice went back to her side of the table and they finished their meal while they chatted. Alice went to freshen up while Jasper paid and used the moment to send Edward a text. He hadn't been asleep very long before Alice had come to his room, and when they were done at the studio, he had a feeling he'd be ready for sleep again, but didn't want Edward to think he'd been blown off.

When Alice returned, Jasper had a small coffee to go in his hands. He felt bad when he saw a bit of guilt creep across her face.

"I'm sorry I dragged you out of bed this morning," she said as they walked back out to her car.

"Don't worry about it," Jasper answered with a soft smile. "It's the weekend, and I don't have a ton of work to do, so I can catch up this afternoon if I need to. One night's missed sleep won't hurt me."

Alice nodded tightly.

"Alice, honey, I mean it," Jasper said seriously. "I have reoccurring insomnia, and I'm used to missing a night's sleep here and there. I'd rather spend it chatting with you than staring at the ceiling. Okay?"

"Okay," she answered softly.

"Good. Now, I believe we agreed that I'd get to keep my clothes on for you, so I'm just givin' you fair warnin' that I'll not be strippin' off for you." Jasper let his accent thicken a bit to get a smile out of her, and it worked.

"Aw, but Jasper where's the fun in that," Alice teased in a whining voice as they sped off toward her studio.

Alice's studio was a suite in a larger building that was a bit like a co-op for artists. They rented space as needed, though as they entered, Jasper saw that many of the stalls looked to be pretty permanently inhabited. It looked to have everything a creative person could hope to want, from a large oven to several very large, deep sinks, and a commercial refrigerator.

Alice led Jasper through the building to her space near the back. She flicked on the lights and Jasper looked around her work space. There was nothing that really marked out her territory in terms of physical borders; the lights illuminated a large area that contained several individual workspaces as far as Jasper could tell. Alice dropped her bag on a large drafting table and kicked her shoes off under it.

There was a large bookshelf lining the wall loaded with various pottery. Jasper drifted over to get a closer look at them while Alice shuffled through her desk looking for something, apparently. "Alice, these are gorgeous," he said quietly. What he had taken for pottery was actually an assortment of functional dishware from mixing bowls to coffee cups in a variety of colors.

"Thanks," she said, coming up behind him. "I've had a lot of success with those at craft fairs. I've got another big one coming up right after Thanksgiving, so I've just got a couple weeks left to try to get things finished. I've got a ton of stuff boxed up and ready to go."

"Sounds like you could have avoided that starving artist life after all," he teased lightly.

"Maybe. But I've kind of fallen in love with teaching, so I'm glad I took that path," Alice responded with a smile. "This lets me be creative when I want to be and help build up a nest egg. Plus, I get to meet interesting people when I'm out at fairs or galleries."

"Sounds like you enjoy it."

"I really do," Alice said. "It's fun to meet other artists and people who are just interested in seeing what's out there. Sometimes I drag Edward with me, but usually Bella and I go. She gets to show off a bit of her crochet work without having to get a booth of her own and we get to spend time together."

"You should take her to the next one," Jasper suggested, lifting a bowl with notches in it, frowning.

"It's a rice bowl," Alice explained. "Chopsticks? And yes, I was planning on it."

"Ah," Jasper realized the chopsticks would sit nicely in the notches. "That's pretty creative."

Alice nodded. "It's one of my more popular pieces, especially with the students, since it's great for ramen noodles or rice."

"Makes sense. Beats eating out of the pot."

"Jasper Whitlock!" Alice scolded, her hands on her hips. "You didn't."

Jasper flashed her an innocent look. "What?"

"Men," she said with a roll of her eyes. "I'm assuming you no longer have that problem, since you mostly eat with us, now."

"No, ma'am," Jasper answered, setting the bowl back on the shelf.

"Good," Alice said with a firm nod. "Now get over here so I can figure out what to do with you."

Jasper followed her over to her drafting table and patiently sat while she dug out a sketch pad and tapped a pencil against her lips in thought.

While she was thinking, Jasper's phone vibrated in his pocket. He found a message from Edward.

_have fun. let me know when ur back. if she gets u nekkid i want pics._

Jasper laughed quietly and responded.

_sorry will have to wait on the nekkidness._

It was only a moment before he got the next message.

_dam. she ok?_

_will b. talk l8r?_

_yup. pick u up 5_

_k._

Jasper put his phone away and looked up to see Alice behind her camera, snapping away. She peeked out from behind it with a small knowing smile on her face. "What?"

"Nothing," she answered with a shake of her head. She flipped through the pictures on her digital camera, nodding to herself as she set it aside. "Alright, now for you, Dr. Whitlock."

Alice kept her word and Jasper didn't have to get naked for her, though she tried to persuade him to at least take off his shirt. He gave in eventually, feeling self conscious about the scars that marred his chest and back, but she didn't make a big deal about it. She did, however, use her cell phone to snap a few pictures to send to Edward.

He patiently let Alice do her thing while they kept up a stream of easy conversation. She snapped a few pictures but mostly sketched and wouldn't let him see when she was done a few hours later. It was mid-morning and more artists had slowly arrived, calling out greetings to each other. Alice shouted her goodbyes when they left, and still wouldn't give Jasper any hint of what she was up to.

"Thanks for this morning, Jas," Alice said as she pulled back into her parking spot on campus. "I needed the distraction."

"You're welcome, darlin'," Jasper answered. "I'm here for you, anytime."

They split ways and Jasper sent Edward another text as he walked back to his building. He just let Edward know he was back and was going to try to get some sleep. Before he stripped and crawled into bed, Jasper carried the empty mugs to the kitchenette and filled them with water, leaving them in the sink to wash later. Emmett's side of the suite was quiet.

When he returned to his room, Jasper closed the blinds, shutting out the grey late morning light before he collapsed onto his bed in his underwear. He set his alarm for 4 pm, just in case, and crawled between the sheets. Despite the coffee he'd had with breakfast hours earlier, he easily fell asleep as the rest of the campus began to stir itself awake.

He was awoken a couple hours later by pounding on the adjoining door, which wasn't locked. It took Jasper a moment to reorient himself. "Yeah?" he called out.

"Hey, man…" Emmett came in, looking stressed out, his short hair disheveled as if he'd been running his hands through it. "Oh, shit, sorry."

Jasper waved him off. "What's up?" He slid out of bed and pulled his jeans and t-shirt back on. He wasn't going to get much more sleep, he decided, looking at Emmett's somewhat frazzled appearance.

"Rosie's late," Emmett blurted out before falling onto Jasper's bed.

"Late for what?" Jasper asked through a yawn, scrubbing his hands through his hair and over his face, wincing at the stubble that scratched his palms. He sat back down next to Emmett.

Emmett looked pained. "She's _late_," he stressed.

"Oh." It took a moment for Jasper's brain to catch up. "Oh!" He shook his head. "I'm guessing by your general stressed demeanor that this is maybe not the best timing?"

"I don't know," Emmett said with a sigh, flopping onto his back. "She wants kids, and we're stable here and all, but I was planning on proposing over Christmas break and not having a shot gun wedding."

"What do you want?" Jasper asked.

"Man, I want the whole 2.5 kids, picket fence, American dream deal. I just don't know that the timing is exactly right. I know we're not getting any younger, but there's still time, and I don't want to have to rush into a wedding or buying a house."

"Slow down, Em," Jasper said patiently. "Nothing's been confirmed yet, right?"

"No. She panicked at brunch when she realized the date and ran off to her room. I think she was going to call the girls."

"Alice and Bella are shopping today," Jasper explained.

Just then Emmett's phone rang. "Yeah baby?" He answered it.

Jasper didn't pretend he wasn't listening to Emmett's side of the conversation. "Alright. Okay. Need me to do anything? Okay. I'll see you at mom and dad's. No, I'm with Jasper. Okay. I love you. Bye." Emmett closed his phone and sighed. "Alice and Bella are going to pick up the tests and head to my mom's." He looked a bit green around the gills. "Rosie is going to meet them there."

Jasper needed to do a bit of damage control and keep Emmett focused on something until dinner so he didn't go completely mad thinking about what-ifs. "Alright, here's what we're going to do. Call your brother and see if he's busy while I grab a shower. Then, we're going out. Sitting here wondering isn't going to help anything, and Rose and the girls will kill you if you show up before she told you to," he said in a warning voice, knowing that's what Emmett would do.

Emmett nodded and flipped his phone back open and scrolled through the contacts while Jasper gathered a change of clothes and made for the shower. He kept it short, despite wanting to linger under the hot water to try to wake him up a little bit more. He didn't bother to shave, just brushed his teeth after the shower and got dressed.

Edward was standing in the kitchenette when Jasper emerged, holding a cup of coffee out.

"Thank you," Jasper sighed gratefully, taking it, and kissing Edward lightly. "Good morning."

Edward flashed his crooked smile. "Has it been? It was for me. I found some very interesting pictures on my phone."

Jasper shrugged. "For the most part." He returned Edward's smile.

"So what's the plan?" Edward asked, leaning against the counter.

Jasper slid in next to him, drinking his coffee. "Distract Emmett. Did he tell you?"

Edward nodded. "What did you have in mind?"

"Are you up for a day of mini golf, batting cages, and whatever else Funland can provide?" Jasper asked honestly. He wanted to bring Edward along, but didn't want to do anything that would cause him to be in pain or uncomfortable.

"Sure," Edward answered easily. "I can just take breaks when I need to. I'll be fine."

"You're sure?" Jasper clarified.

"Yes. Now shut up and let me kiss you good morning," Edward said, a bit of a growl in his voice.

"Yes, sir," Jasper answered quietly and met him half way. Edward's lips met his, warm and soft, and Jasper returned as much pressure as Edward gave. Jasper's bottom lip was caught between Edward's as he gently sucked on it before his tongue drifted over it. Jasper slid his coffee cup onto the counter and threaded his hand into Edward's hair at the nape if his neck, though he let Edward control the motions as Jasper resisted at first, more than happy to tease Edward slightly before parting his lips against Edward's.

"Oh, hell. I don't need to see that," Emmett swore, interrupting them as he came through from his own room. "Don't you have a room?"

Jasper could tell he wasn't really upset by what he'd seen, since there was no heat behind his words. Edward broke the lip-lock, kissing him once more, chastely, before pulling away, and Jasper let his hand rest on his shoulder. Emmett winked at them as he passed through to Jasper's room. Jasper took Edward's right hand and they followed, so Jasper could finish getting ready to go.

He found clean socks and his trainers and tugged them on. "Ready to go?" he asked them both, reaching for his coat and scooping his keys and wallet off the table.

"Where are we going?" Emmett asked.

"Not telling," Edward teased him as Jasper held the door open for them to pass through.

"Oh, come on, Eddie," Emmett whined.

"Don't call me Eddie." Edward brought his cane down on Emmett's toe and the bigger brother yelped as Jasper laughed. They'd already succeeded in getting his mind off Rosalie, if even just for a few moments. Mission accomplished.

* * *

end note: the pottery/ceramics are based on a semi-local artist that I've seen at a booth at Apple Hill over the years. I don't have her name, just the initials JM, and my Google-fu failed. I just own a few of her pieces. I'll put pictures on the blog for anyone interested.


	18. Chapter 17: Family

Hope no one is disappointed this is a bit earlier than planned. As always, much love to Naelany and wishingforlove for their awesome beta skills, and drtammy1511 for her consultation on a few things mentioned here and coming up soon.

* * *

Edward continued to bicker with Emmett on the way to his car, while Jasper lingered behind them, laughing. He had to admit, Jasper's idea was a pretty brilliant one. A day of games would bring out Emmett's competitive side long enough to keep him from worrying about Rose, and Edward could use a day off as well. He'd been struggling with many of his students since the mid-semester break. They were all beginning to feel run down and uninspired, and it was frustrating Edward.

They piled into Edward's Volvo, and it didn't escape Edward's notice that Jasper let Emmett have the front seat.

"Any stops we need to make on our way?" Edward asked as he started the car.

"Starbucks?" Emmett asked.

Edward looked at Jasper in the mirror and he nodded. "Starbucks it is." He drove to the one nearest campus, taking a deep breath to calm himself down as Emmett fiddled with the stereo the whole ride over.

Emmett leapt from the car when they parked, and Jasper waited with Edward, laughing quietly. "Does he normally have this short of an attention span?"

Edward shook his head. "Only when he's stressed about something." Jasper's hand was warm against his back.

Emmett had already ordered when Jasper and Edward reached the counter. "Want anything?" Edward asked.

"Yeah…" Jasper looked like he was trying to decide. "I'll have a venti caramel macchiato," he said.

Edward smirked and relayed Jasper's order, plus his own tall coffee, room for cream and paid.

"What?" Jasper asked.

"I never took you for a foofoo coffee drinker, is all," Edward said with a grin.

Jasper stepped behind him as they moved over near Emmett to wait for their drinks and spoke softly in Edward's ear. "It'll hold me over until dinner, unless we'll need to feed Emmett between now and then." His warm breath stirred Edward's hair and he leaned back into Jasper slightly so they were pressed together, though no one looked to be the wiser in the crowded coffee shop.

"Yeah, we probably will. And I hadn't thought about feeding you," Edward said somewhat sheepishly. "It's nearly noon."

"Is that all?" Jasper asked. "It feels later. And don't worry about me. I can grab a snack later if I need to."

Edward murmured an agreement as their names were called. They collected their drinks and Emmett and returned to the car, and Edward got them back on the road toward Port Angeles.

"What's in P.A.?" Emmett asked.

"It's a surprise," Edward said dryly.

Jasper laughed and Emmett huffed a sigh. "Oh, you big baby," Edward said with a roll of his eyes.

"Fine." Emmett crossed his arms over his broad chest and pouted.

Edward laughed quietly and met Jasper's gaze in the mirror. "How's Alice?"

"She'll be alright," Jasper answered.

Emmett straightened out of his slouching pout and shifted slightly so he could see Jasper over his shoulder. "Where's she been?"

"She's been spending a lot of time in her studio," Jasper explained. "Kate was seeing someone else while they were still together. Alice is upset, but I think she's working through it. We talked a bit and it seems things were rocky for awhile. Alice had offered to cut her course load back and Kate wouldn't let her, and it just kind of hit her this morning that it was Kate that was pulling away." Jasper sipped at his coffee. "She's going to be fine, but it might take awhile, since she's distracting herself by gearing up for some craft show that's happening after Thanksgiving."

"Yeah, she goes every year. Makes a killing," Emmett commented. "Damn, I never thought Kate was cheating on her."

"Me either," Edward said. It seemed out of character, but Edward supposed he didn't know Kate as well as he could have. "But I guess that explains why she wasn't around much lately."

Edward watch Jasper shrug in the backseat. He'd never met Kate. "That's probably part of it," Jasper said. "She was probably feeling guilty."

Emmett flashed Jasper a look. "How do you always know this shit?"

Jasper grinned. "I nearly had a double major in psychology. I considered medical school briefly."

For some reason, Edward didn't find that revelation particularly surprising. It wasn't just Jasper's innate empathy that helped him understand people, though Edward supposed that helped. "Why didn't you go?"

"My grades in the required science courses weren't high enough, and I wasn't willing to put myself through the hell the advanced classes would have been, given my lack of natural aptitude for the hard sciences," Jasper said casually. "As interesting as psychology was, I was more interested in history anyway, so I took the classes that interested me. Why'd you pick chemistry, Em?"

Emmett grinned. "I like to blow things up."

Edward smiled and shook his head as Jasper chuckled in the back seat.

"I got my BS in sports medicine," Emmett explained. "I played football and it made sense. I figured after I retired I could be a trainer or something. I was pretty sure I'd be playing professionally because I'd been courted for the draft, but I insisted on finishing my college degree first. I had a minor in chemistry because I liked it, but didn't think I could dedicate the time to the major. So after I got hurt, I was ready to go back into the field that I was really interested in. I was lucky enough to get accepted into the program and here I am."

"Why not research?" Jasper asked.

Emmett shrugged. "It got boring. I decided that I really liked teaching when I was a TA, so I decided that I could have more fun teaching kids to make things go boom than spending all my time in the lab trying to make the next smudge proof lipstick or end up working for the government."

Edward smiled. He always thought Emmett would have been an excellent kindergarten teacher if not for his love of chemistry and teaching older kids the right chemical compounds that existed in foods to get them in trouble in the dining hall.

The conversation continued on the remainder of the short drive to Port Angeles. Edward easily found his way to the mini amusement/sports park and eventually resorted to actually using his handicapped sticker and took one of the available spaces near the door. He didn't like relying on the accommodation, since he was capable of walking, and especially at places like Funland where he'd be on his feet and walking around all day. At least, he planned on being on his feet for the next several hours, if his body cooperated.

"Funland? Awesome!" Emmett declared, letting his seatbelt fly off and bolting from the car.

"Good choice, Jas," Edward mused as they followed a bit more slowly.

"Thanks. I just thought he needed to be off campus and thinking about something else for awhile before he drove us all nuts," Jasper admitted.

Edward chuckled. "He would have, too. As much as he and Rosalie want kids, I know he wanted to do things more traditionally. This is throwing a wrench into his plans."

"Did you know he was planning to propose?" Jasper asked.

Edward nodded. "Who do you think took him ring shopping?"

They caught up with Emmett just inside. "So, we've got," Edward looked at his watch. "About 4 hours before we need to head back to town. What do you want to do, Emmett?"

"Mini golf first," Emmett decided. He led the way to the counter and got them checked in, got a start time and hole number, and their putters and colored balls. Being Washington and the Olympic Peninsula, the mini golf course was indoors, but the realistic murals on the walls were nearly enough so players felt they were outside. The indoor course also meant that Funland was one of the more popular hangouts between Port Angeles and Forks, and the surrounding smaller communities. Edward wouldn't be surprised if they ran into groups of their students.

"Edward, I think you get the blue ball," Emmett said, handing it over with a wink.

Edward just rolled his eyes. "Yeah, thanks. Ass." He bit his tongue on the retort that if Emmett'd had blue balls they wouldn't be there.

"Jas, green or red?" Emmett held his hand out with the two balls in his palm.

Jasper plucked the green ball from Emmett's huge hand.

"We're supposed to start on hole 10," Emmett said, referring to the receipt in his hand.

"We shall follow, fearless leader," Jasper quipped, grinning.

"Smart ass," Emmett grumbled, glancing around and heading off toward their starting point.

It had been awhile since Edward had spent any significant time with his brother away from Rose or the rest of the family, and it was nice seeing his playful side out in force.

Edward accepted his putter when they arrived at their hole.

"Alright," Emmett said, rubbing his hands together. "Bets?"

Edward sighed. He should have expected that. "Five dollars per hole?"

"Sure. Jas man, you in?" Emmett asked.

Edward hoped his glance conveyed to his boyfriend that he didn't have to participate in his brother's insanity. Emmett could, and often did, place bets on just about anything. It was all in fun, but sometimes it got out of hand.

Jasper shrugged. "Sure."

Emmett took the first shot. Edward smirked as he watched his bear of a brother set up his shot, looking entirely too serious. He laughed out loud when Emmett wriggled his hips as he settled into a stance before tapping the ball with his putter. Over the years, Emmett had gotten used to adjusting for his strength, but it appeared he miscalculated because his ball fell short of the obstacle in his way and he cursed quietly and pouted while Edward lined up his own shot.

Edward's ball went through the obstacle but fell short of the hole on the other side. He stepped out of the way for Jasper who considered the hole and took his shot quickly, and was rewarded by a clear rattling thunk as his ball went into the cup on the other side. Jasper smirked in triumph as Edward laughed softly and Emmett protested with a loud "Hey!"

"I think we may have a ringer, Em," Edward said as Emmett stepped up to retry his shot from closer to the obstacle, and Jasper stood on the side, still grinning. Emmett's ball went through on the second try and they moved to the backside of the hole to complete it. It took Edward only one more stroke and Emmett two before they could move on.

Emmett grumbled as he marked down the scores, then as he whipped out his wallet and handed Jasper a five dollar bill. Edward did the same.

"Thank you much," Jasper said with a smile, stuffing the bills into his pocket as they walked to the next hole.

Emmett stalked off to the next hole ahead of Edward and Jasper and Edward laughed quietly. "Don't worry," Jasper said lowly in Edward's ear, his hand warm on Edward's back. "I'll let him win the next one."

"What about me?" Edward asked, teasing.

"You have to work for it." Jasper winked and stepped away with a little grin.

True to his word, Jasper let Emmett win at the next hole. Edward didn't mind losing; he was having fun watching his boyfriend and brother bond a bit as they teased each other and riled each other up.

As they moved onto the next hole, they ran into a group of students from school. From long experience, Edward and Emmett knew not to say anything unless the students did first – it made things less awkward for the students that way. Jasper seemed to follow that rule as well, or he didn't know any of the students, since he didn't say anything either as they passed.

They played two more holes, Emmett and Jasper winning one each before Edward decided he was ready for a break. They were not quite halfway through the course yet. "I'm going to sit this one out," Edward said softly. The nagging pain he'd been coping with for the last several weeks from his lower back and hip had gotten worse with being on his feet, and he needed to sit down for a few minutes.

Jasper shot him a concerned look but Edward waved him off. A drinking fountain nearby provided water for Edward to take a couple pills he'd tucked into his pocket when Emmett had called earlier. He settled onto a bench with a quiet sigh, stretching his leg out in front of him slowly and focused on his breathing to push the pain away while he waited for the drugs to kick in.

"Fucking Whitlock, man. My dad pulled my allowance for a month when he got the news I'd been suspended." The male voice was young and Edward glanced around, looking for the speaker.

"Mine threatened to leave me home with a sitter over the holidays instead of going on vacation with the rest of the family," another one said.

Edward finally put the voices with the group of students they'd passed between holes.

"You were the two stupid enough to buy papers and turn them in when you're in the same fucking class, retards," a third voice added. "You shouldn't have bought them from the same person. Notice I didn't get caught."

Edward recognized the trio as Jared, Embry and Paul. Jared and Embry were two of the three students Jasper had had to bring up on disciplinary action for cheating the previous week.

"We should do something," Jared said. "What-cock shares an office with Sexy Swan, right?"

Edward bit his lip to keep from making a sound at the nicknames. He didn't want to give away that he was listening.

"Yeah. You got something in mind?" Embry asked.

"Dunno. But we probably better not fuck with Sexy Swan," Jared mused. "Coach Cullen'd have our asses and I need to stay on the basketball team if I want to play in college. I'll think of something."

"Better make it a good one, bro," Paul said. "You'll only get the one chance, and it'd better be worth risking expulsion."

Their voices started moving away and Edward shook his head. Boys. He'd give Jasper the head's up, though, just in case they actually did manage to pull something off.

"Hey." Jasper flopped onto the bench next to Edward.

"Hi. Who won?" He bumped shoulders with Jasper.

"Me. Emmett'll be right back," Jasper explained. "How're you doing?"

"Okay. Ready to play again." Edward smiled. The ibuprofen he'd taken was beginning to take the edge off the pain.

They were interrupted by giggles from a group of girls at the hole across from the bench where they were sitting. Edward looked up and they started giggling and whispering. Edward laughed and Jasper smiled.

"Come on," Jasper said, standing. He offered Edward a hand up, which he took. "Let's meet Emmett at the next hole."

They finished out the round of mini-golf and still had some time to burn, so after a snack break, Emmett talked Jasper into the batting cages after Edward assured him he'd be alright watching. His balance was no longer good enough for him to play, especially given that he was right handed.

"I can sit with you and watch," Jasper offered one last time.

Edward kissed him quickly. "Go play. I'll be fine. Emmett?" He grinned as Emmett dragged Jasper off to check out batting helmets. He waited, leaning against the wall until they returned and he followed them until they found stalls next to each other, and Edward sat on the bench behind them where he could watch.

There were days when Edward cursed the damage done to his body. The accident had stolen much more than his ability to play professional piano, but also his ability to find joy in small things like playing baseball with his family. He knew he'd made amazing progress in his physical recovery, beyond what his therapists had expected.

He was wrenched from his thoughts as Jasper put on a little show for him, tossing the bat around in a flurry of movement. Edward applauded and Jasper bowed slightly from the shoulders and turned to face the machine that would lob balls at him. He took up a stance and Edward took the moment to admire Jasper's ass in the jeans he was wearing, low slung around his hips, his boxers peeking out, revealed by the way his shirt lifted when he raised his arms in preparation to hit the ball.

Edward was content with the pace their physical relationship was taking. They hadn't done much more than kiss, which wasn't surprising, given that the only time they'd been in a bed big enough to do anything they'd both been too ill to do anything more than literally sleep together. Jasper was openly physically affectionate, though, and Edward found himself looking forward to whatever touch Jasper would bestow. He'd be lying if he said he didn't want to sleep with him, but Edward also knew they both had some issues to work through, and they'd figure it out sooner or later. In the meantime, Edward made due with ogling Jasper in the gym in the mornings and building up a fantasy in his head.

Though the afternoon was providing some new material for him as he watched Jasper swing and connect with a ball, returning the blond's bright grin when Jasper turned to look at him.

Edward changed his focus to Emmett and watched some of the tension melt away from his brother's broad shoulders as he swung away at the balls pitched to him. Physical exertion had always seemed to be Emmett's preferred method of coping, and Edward was again grateful for Jasper's insightfulness, since he'd found the perfect combination of things to keep Emmett occupied for the day so he wasn't bugging Rose every ten minutes.

It was time to head back to Forks when they were finished. Emmett seemed more relaxed, though Jasper seemed about asleep on his feet. Edward knew he hadn't been sleeping well, and Alice had gotten him up extremely early, if he'd even been to sleep, if the time stamp on the text message he'd received was any indication.

"You look tired," Edward said quietly while Emmett went to return their gear.

"I'm alright," Jasper said with a tired smile. "I should sleep tonight, though."

Edward returned the smile. "Well, that's good then. C'mon, you can doze in the car," he said, taking Jasper's left hand in his right and leading him to go find Emmett.

Emmett's anxiety seemed to return on the drive back to Forks, as he started taking his phone from his pocket every few minutes, looking for a missed call or text message.

"Relax, Em," Edward said quietly. "Getting yourself all worked up isn't going to help anything. Whatever the tests say, you've got to be there for Rose."

"Yeah, I know. I'm just freaked out a little bit here. I wasn't prepared to propose tonight, or even this week, but I can. Got the ring in my pocket." Emmett patted his hip.

"You don't' think that might be a little too much for today?" Jasper asked quietly from the backseat. "If she is pregnant, you don't think proposing on the day she finds out might be a little overwhelming?"

"Jasper's got a point," Edward said. "You know she'll keep the baby; you don't have to propose to her for that."

Emmett nodded, appearing to consider their words. "Yeah, you're right. Today's probably not the day."

"See what happens and take it from there," Jasper advised.

Edward flicked on the radio when the ride turned silent, Emmett lost to his own thoughts, a small smile creeping onto his face every so often, and Jasper appeared to be dozing in the backseat. When they arrived at their parents' house, Emmett practically bolted from the car and Jasper slowly came awake when Edward shut off the purring engine.

"Nice nap?" Edward asked gently.

Jasper scrubbed his hands through his hair and yawned. "Yeah." His face slowly morphed into a sleepy smile.

Edward returned the smile and they got out of the car, Jasper coming to stand on Edward's right side and taking his hand as walked up the drive and into the house.

"Hello son, Jasper," Carlisle greeted them. He was seated on the couch watching the news on low, a large glass of iced tea on a coaster on the coffee table. "Your brother and the girls are upstairs."

Jasper gave Edward's hand a squeeze and excused himself, moving down the hall while Edward took a seat on one of the wide chairs that was just big enough for two. "How'd things go today?" He asked his father.

Carlisle shrugged. "They've been up there most of the day and I haven't heard much out of them except when your mom came down for snacks a couple of hours ago. I'd be willing to bet that Emmett runs them all off here in a few minutes so he can talk to Rosalie."

As if his words made it happen, Alice, Bella, and his mom all came down the stairs, Bella tripping on the last one and stumbling into Alice, who giggled.

"So?" Edward asked.

"We don't know. She had to wait so she could get an accurate result," Alice explained. "She's waiting now with Emmett."

"Of course Dr. Helpful over there," Esme said, waving at Carlisle, "Was anything but."

"Hey!" Carlisle protested. "I offered to take her to the clinic and get a blood test, she'd just have to wait for results when the lab was open on Monday."

Edward bit his tongue to keep from laughing when his mother let out a 'humph' and said "See? Less than helpful." Alice and Bella weren't so careful and giggled quietly.

"Alright, alright. How about I be helpful and get those pizzas ordered for dinner," Carlisle offered, attempting to placate his wife.

"I'll order, but you, my darling, can go pick them up," Esme said with a grin. "And I'll give you a list of other things you can pick up at the store while you're out."

Carlisle just nodded. "Yes, dear." He followed her into the kitchen.

The girls giggled again and Jasper emerged from down the hall, trying to figure out what he missed. Edward just shook his head. Jasper joined Edward on the chair. He knew his parents were dawdling in the kitchen, waiting to hear the news from upstairs before they did anything. Edward wondered how his mother's shopping list would be altered by whatever news they received.

Bella and Alice took a seat on the couch and Alice played with Bella's hair, braiding sections into long plaits before combing her fingers through it and starting over again. Edward watched as Bella relaxed under his cousin's ministrations. He felt himself relax minutely as Jasper took his hand and nuzzled his temple lightly when Edward's head fell back against his shoulder.

"What did you boys end up doing today?" Alice asked, still playing with Bella's hair. "We expected Emmett to call every few minutes."

"We took Emmett to Funland and let him play," Edward said. "It kept him distracted."

"How much money did you lose?" Alice asked, smirking.

"We kept the bets small, only five per hole," Edward answered with a half-shrug, not wanting to dislodge Jasper who was quiet and probably half asleep again.

"So, what, about a hundred bucks?" Bella asked, looking over. Her smile was soft.

"Yeah, about," Edward admitted. Golf never had been his game. Even mini golf. "Though a couple holes were close."

Jasper laughed quietly in his ear. "Is that what they're calling that now?"

"Oh, shut up," Edward answered. "Let me keep my dignity intact, will you?"

"Sure," Jasper murmured, and the girls laughed.

Esme's 'mom hearing' must have been turned on because she stepped into the living room, Carlisle on her heels as Emmett came down the stairs. He looked a strange mix of sad and relieved. Everyone turned and looked as he stood at the base.

"Negative," he said quietly. "We're going to be upstairs for a bit. Can you all just give us some time?"

Esme crossed to give him a big hug, which Emmett returned, hiding his face in her neck for a moment, though he absolutely dwarfed her. "Of course, baby," she said softly. "We're going to order pizzas tonight. Just come down when you're ready."

"Thanks, Mom." Emmett let her go and took the stairs back up two at a time.

It felt like everyone had heaved a huge sigh of relief, the unseen tension in the room fading with Emmett's news. Esme and Carlisle went back into the kitchen, and Carlisle left a few moments later, list in hand, while Esme called in the pizza order.

"Alice dear, why don't you pick out a movie. I think we'll just keep things light tonight," Esme said. "Edward, Jasper, do you need anything?"

"I'll get it, mom," Edward answered. He kissed Jasper lightly and levered himself out of the chair, making his way into the kitchen behind his mom. "How are you?" He asked her quietly.

"A bit disappointed," she answered. "I'm ready for grandbabies," she admitted.

Edward hugged her with one arm. "They'll come."

"I know, love," his mom answered with a smile. "And it's probably better that they're ready when they do." She pulled down a couple of glasses. "How're things with you and Jasper?"

Edward smiled. "Good." He leaned against the counter while his mom prepared glasses with ice.

"Hm?" Esme returned the smile. "It's good to see you happy."

"I am, Mom. I really am." Edward grabbed a bottle of root beer from the fridge and split it between the glasses.

"He's good for you, honey. And you for him, I think. He seems much more open than when I first met him," Esme observed. "I'm glad he found us."

"I am too," Edward answered. "It's almost like he was a missing piece of the family," he admitted quietly.

"It does seem that way." Esme kissed Edward's cheek. "Can you manage these? I need to get salad dressing made before your father gets back with everything."

"Sure. What did you send him after?" Edward balanced the glasses in his palm.

"Besides pizza, salad, breadsticks, and wings? Ice cream sundae stuff for dessert." Esme's eyes sparkled.

"Love you, Mom," Edward said with a laugh.

Esme ruffled his hair and sent him on his way. "Love you too, sweetheart."

Edward shuffled his way back through the living room. He set the glasses down on the edge of the coffee table, reaching for coasters before his mother could yell at him. Jasper hadn't moved from the chair, though he had kicked off his shoes and tucked one of his legs under him. Alice was still searching through the movie selection and Bella had vanished.

"Made yourself at home, I see," Edward teased.

"Your mother has been on my case about it for weeks now. I thought it was probably about time, since they haven't run me off yet," Jasper said dryly, but his blue eyes sparkled with good humor.

"I don't think there's any chance of that happening," Edward said, settling next to him. He leaned in close to Jasper. "She likes you," he said lowly, his breath washing across Jasper's ear.

Jasper shivered a bit. "I like you," he whispered.

Edward smiled. "I noticed." He bumped shoulders with Jasper, causing the blond to turn. "I kinda like you too," he said before he kissed him softly.

"Gah!" Emmett yelled. "I swear you two wait until I'm around to start that," he grumbled before disappearing into the kitchen.

Edward felt his ears heat up in embarrassment as he heard Alice and Bella's quiet laughter, and Jasper's soft chuckle rumbled against him as Jasper's head came to rest on Edward's shoulder.

"Quit picking on your brother." Esme's voice carried out of the kitchen followed by an "Ow! Mo-om," as Emmett whined his complaint.

"I like your mom, too," Jasper said quietly as Alice came up with a handful of movies.

"Disney night!" She declared. "We need something light and fun."

"Do I want to know why your family owns all those Disney movies?" Jasper asked quietly.

"Esme thought they'd be a good investment," Edward said with a shrug, his eyes flicking upstairs.

"Ah." Jasper nodded.

Emmett went back upstairs with a couple bottles of water and Alice got the first movie queued up. While the Disney theme played, Edward kicked off his shoes and shifted to get slightly more comfortable and ended up with Jasper's arms around his waist, and his back against Jasper's chest.

They were halfway through _The Little Mermaid_ when Edward heard Carlisle's Mercedes pull into the driveway. Jasper nudged Edward lightly in warning and rose, stepping into his shoes to go help him bring things in. Esme had already carried plates and such into the living room so they could continue the movie marathon while they ate.

Jasper carried in three paper bags and Carlisle followed with three large pizzas and three plastic bags dangling from his wrists, and a large bowl balanced on top of the boxes. Alice was faster than Edward in getting up to help relieve Carlisle of some of his burdens while Jasper carried the bags into the kitchen. Alice arranged the food on the coffee table. There was a huge salad, two orders of wings and breadsticks and the three large pizzas. Even for eight of them it seemed to be a lot of food.

Esme brought out the salad dressing and told them to dig in before heading upstairs, probably to let Emmett and Rose know that it was dinner time. Everyone fixed their plates and Edward settled back in the oversized chair, frowning slightly when Jasper settled at his feet on the floor. Edward nudged him with his foot and Jasper tipped his head back to look at Edward.

"There's not really enough room for us to eat if we're sitting there together," Jasper explained.

Edward 'hrmped' but Jasper was right. Alice restarted the movie that she'd paused when she'd gotten up to help Carlisle, and they all ate in a comfortable companionable atmosphere.

Emmett and Rosalie came down after a few minutes. Rose's eyes were red rimmed, but she looked fairly composed as she held Emmett's hand when they came down the stairs. She offered them a watery smile as she took a plate and filled it behind Emmett, sitting on his lap in the other chair.

Edward nudged Jasper with his foot again and shot him a look that he hoped clearly said 'if they can do it so can we.' Jasper just rolled his eyes. Edward knew he was being a bit silly, but given the looks his family was shooting his way, he was also exuding happiness.

After _The Little Mermaid_, Alice went old school and put in _The Sword in the Stone_. Jasper rejoined Edward in the chair when they'd finished eating, and Edward reclined against Jasper's chest, feeling his steady heartbeat and breathing against his back, his breath gently stirring his hair as one of Jasper's hand slipped under Edward's shirt and just rested flat against Edward's skin.

It took only a few minutes and Edward heard Jasper's breathing deepen and even out, his fingers going slightly slack against Edward's belly. Apparently a warm and full Jasper was a sleepy Jasper, Edward decided, smiling softly. It had been a long day for him.

By the time the movie finished, everyone was ready for dessert. Edward gently untangled himself from Jasper's arms and left him sleeping in the chair as he followed everyone else into the kitchen to make his sundae.

"Is Jasper alright, son?" Carlisle asked.

"Yeah. Just been a long day and he didn't sleep much last night," Edward explained, surveying the various toppings his mother had sent Carlisle after.

"My fault," Alice said at Edward's elbow. "I needed someone to talk to this morning and I woke him up really early."

"It's alright," Edward said, wrapping her in a one-armed hug. "He didn't mind. And I think he liked getting to spend time with you this morning."

Alice hugged him back and gave him a grateful smile. "I'm just glad I wasn't traumatized by seeing something I shouldn't when I knocked on his door this morning," she teased.

"You're just as bad as Emmett," Edward growled playfully, to everyone's amusement. He continued building his sundae and grabbed two spoons from the counter, though he was pretty sure that Jasper wouldn't eat much, if any; Edward figured it would all be too sweet for him.

Edward returned to the living room and Jasper was blinking rapidly, covering a yawn with his hand. "Hey," Edward greeted him with a soft smile.

"Hey," Jasper answered, shifting over slightly. "What'cha got?"

"Dessert." Edward handed over the bowl as he got himself situated again, this time sitting beside Jasper so their shoulders bumped, tucking his right arm behind Jasper's back to rest on his right flank.

Everyone else returned and Alice announced the last movie would be _The Incredibles_, and she got it started while everyone settled back in.

Jasper balanced the bowl on his thigh and Edward handed him a spoon. As he thought, Jasper took a few bites and let Edward finish the sundae himself. "Too sweet?" Edward asked.

"Yeah. And I'm just not a huge ice cream person," Jasper answered with a shrug. His eyes were still sleepy.

"Do you want to go?" Edward asked. "You look like you're ready to crash."

"If you don't mind," Jasper answered quietly.

"Of course not." Edward kissed him softly. He rose and carried his bowl into the kitchen. "Sorry to eat and run," he said when he returned, Alice pausing the movie. "But I think we're going to go."

Everyone waved off his apologies and he and Jasper slipped back into their shoes. Rose met them at the door with the packet of leftover pizza Esme insisted they take.

"Thanks for making sure he was distracted today," she said with a small smile.

"No problem," Jasper said quietly with a small smile, kissing her cheek. "We had fun."

She handed him the leftovers and held the door for them. It was oddly comforting for Edward to be guiding Jasper with his right hand at Jasper's back as they made their way to the car. It was rare that Edward got to be physically stronger for anyone anymore. Even the girls were more often called upon to do things because Edward was limited in his mobility.

Jasper was quiet for a few minutes leading Edward to believe he'd fallen asleep again until he broached the silence in the car. "Have you ever thought about having a family?"

The question wasn't totally unexpected given the events of the day, but it still made Edward pause. "I've thought about it, but not seriously. I figured it would come down to whomever I settled down with, and see what course things took. But I think I'd like to have kids someday. Have you?"

Jasper shrugged. "Sometimes. I've thought about adopting, if I ever settle down. I've enjoyed this vagabond lifestyle for the last few years."

"Do you think that might change?" Edward asked, surprised he didn't trip over the words. "The travelling teacher thing?" His heart was in his stomach as he waited for the answer.

"Yeah. I think it could," Jasper answered. "I like it here. I like Forks, and the school. I feel like I have a family again, for the first time in a long time. I've got you."

"Yes you do," Edward said quietly. He took Jasper's hand in his right. "You know I care about you, right?"

Jasper's smile was lazy, but it reached his eyes as he squeezed Edward's hand. "Yeah. I know." When they stopped at a light, Jasper leaned over and kissed him softly. "I do, too."

Edward smiled. "I know." He kissed Jasper back as the light turned green. The rest of the drive back to campus was quiet and they rode hand in hand.

* * *

Alright, so the relationship is making some progress, yes? ^_^ I've had a lot of questions about when these boys are going to finally be intimate and the short answer is soon. I'm not giving away any more than that.

A couple things are going up on the blog. There's a different preview than the review replies, and there will be a music video for the song that Jasper's listening to at the beginning of the next chapter. There will be quite a bit of different things going up over the next several chapters, mostly vids and links to things referenced, for those interested.

Chapter 18 should post on Monday or Tuesday, and I'll resume the weekly schedule at that point. I'm just really excited for that chapter, so I think y'all will be too.


	19. Chapter 18: Stories and Realizations

**Well, folks, here we are. There are two, possibly three, very big things in this chapter. I hope you like. **

**Thanks as always to my awesome readers, and my lovely betas, Naelany and wishingforlove.**

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The week before the Thanksgiving holiday, the school was practically vibrating with energy. The campus closed for the full week of the holiday, allowing students and faculty to travel and spend as much time with their families as possible. The students grew more unfocused each day, but thankfully Jasper had planned for it. He gave his exams on Tuesday and found movies for his classes to watch the rest of the week.

Jasper announced in all his classes that his office hours were cancelled for the week, so when his last class was excused on Tuesday, Jasper gathered all the sets of his exams and headed for the dining hall. He was once again out of coffee in his office, and he wanted to get the papers graded as soon as possible so his students wouldn't be harassing him for the rest of the week.

Students were already beginning to settle in for dinner when Jasper arrived at the dining hall. He just grabbed a cup of coffee and headed for a table to start grading. He tucked his headphones into his ears and blocked everything out while he worked. He got through the exams for his first period class before he needed a refill, and he left everything in place while he got up to get it. He would wait for the others before he got dinner.

Jasper settled back down to work through another set of exams, oblivious to the students and faculty moving around him. He was absorbed in the short answer tests he'd given to his 5th year students, his head bobbing in time with Carbon Leaf's "The Boxer" when he felt a hand on the back of his neck, causing him to jump.

"Sorry," Edward said with a chuckle as Jasper popped his earbuds out and draped them around his neck.

"S'okay," Jasper said, leaning back into the chair, feeling Edward's warmth behind him. "I was a bit focused."

"What'cha working on?" Edward's hand slid from his neck to Jasper's shoulder, his left hand joining and they rubbed lightly, making Jasper sigh softly.

"Getting exams graded so I can get them back before the students get even more antsy than they already are," Jasper answered.

Edward's hands stopped moving and rested on his shoulders lightly. "Take a break and come get dinner," he said, squeezing lightly.

Jasper glanced up at the clock across the room. He hadn't realized he'd been working for an hour and a half straight. He nodded and rose, stretching a bit before following Edward back to the food lines, passing Emmett and Bella on their way.

He grabbed a tray and surveyed the options. It was late enough that the more popular stations had a shorter line, and Jasper decided he'd wait for made-to-order stir fry. Edward joined him in line.

"What are you doing for Thanksgiving?" Edward asked him as they waited.

Jasper arched an eyebrow. "I assumed I was invited to yours, but if Esme's decided she's sick of me, I suppose I can make due with a frozen dinner in a hotel room."

Edward rolled his eyes. "You know my mother would disown me if I didn't drag your ass home with me. I meant for the rest of the week."

Jasper shrugged and smiled. "I was planning on hanging out. Get ahead on some lesson plans for after the break and start drafting my final exams. Bella asked me to go to Seattle with her one day."

"Come stay with me," Edward said. "At mom and dad's."

"I wouldn't want to impose," Jasper said. The idea appealed to him, though. Getting to spend a whole week with Edward, in a bed large enough for the both of them, even if all they did was sleep.

"It wouldn't be an imposition. Please think about it, Jasper," Edward said softly. "Everyone else will be staying over and I know Esme would love to have you. Hell, I think she likes you more than she likes me and Em."

"And you?" Jasper asked softly.

Edward grinned. "I have to admit that I kind of like the idea of getting to wake up next to you every day for a week," he whispered as they approached the station.

"I'll think about it," Jasper promised, letting Edward go first at placing his order. He'd more or less already made up his mind to go and stay over.

They watched as the chefs behind the line cooked up their stir fry to order in little woks on hotplates and collected their dinner after it cooked. Edward grabbed a glass of milk while Jasper opted for water and carried their tray out to join the rest of the group.

Dinner was noisy; the students weren't the only ones looking forward to the holiday vacation. Emmett was excited about football and the turkey dinner Esme had planned. Rose mentioned wanting to work on everyone's car while she had the time. Alice was planning on working in her studio as much as possible to be ready for the show the next weekend. Other than the trip to Seattle, Jasper and Bella had nothing planned, and Edward seemed to be looking forward to not having anything to do outside of a couple of doctor's appointments.

The rest of the week passed in a blur. Jasper was glad he'd chosen to show movies to most of his classes; it was all he could do to get the students to focus on the screen. He hated to imagine what he'd face if he'd attempted a lecture. Half of his students across his classes were absent on Friday, students choosing to head for home earlier than the end of day to avoid traffic in getting to the airport or driving home.

That meant that the dining hall was fairly quiet on Friday evening, most of the students gone, leaving weary faculty to breathe a sigh of relief and enjoy a somewhat comfortable meal before heading out for various places in the morning. The residence and dining halls were shutting down for the week effective Saturday evening; if students or faculty had nowhere to go, they had to find someplace, but Jasper knew from listening to students all week that there were few that weren't going home or going with friends.

The dining hall staff must have known that the students would be mostly gone because they served up some of the better food of the semester, at least Jasper thought so. The food was never terrible, but it seemed they put just a bit more effort into what was served up that Friday night.

After dinner, Jasper took Edward's hand. "Come back with me tonight? Let's just stay in and watch a few movies?" Alice had been making noise about going out to a club, and Jasper really wasn't in the mood for bad music and too many bodies in an enclosed space.

Edward nodded, probably also dreading the prospect of a night of intoxicated dancing.

They went back to Jasper's room and Jasper set up his laptop to watch movies. Jasper sat back against the wall and Edward leaned back against his chest. Jasper's arms were around Edward's waist. The first movie went on as usual, a few kisses exchanged here and there and some commentary on what they were watching. Jasper queued up the second movie and sighed softly when Edward resettled against him after a trip to the bathroom. A few minutes into the movie Jasper's hands drifted up under the hem of Edward's shirt, lightly skimming over his skin. Jasper smiled whenever he hit someplace sensitive and Edward squirmed away.

"You smell good," Jasper murmured into Edward's neck.

Soon he had Edward divested of his shirt while he nuzzled at his neck and shoulder.

"Dr. Whitlock it appears you had ulterior motives in getting me into your room tonight," Edward teased.

Jasper brushed his hand over the bulge in Edward's trousers, grinning when Edward moaned quietly, the sound going straight to Jasper's groin. "What makes you say that?" He asked lowly, his lips against Edward's ear.

Edward turned his head and caught Jasper's lips in a deep kiss. Jasper's hands ceased their wandering over Edward's torso and went to the fly and button of his trousers, making short work of getting them open and Edward exhaled loudly through his nose, never breaking the kiss.

Jasper's right hand crept under the waistband of Edward's boxers while his left returned to his chest, nails lightly raking over the tender skin. He ran his fingers over the underside of Edward's cock and Edward finally broke off the kiss, hissing softly as his eyes fought to stay open, his head falling back onto Jasper's shoulder. Jasper absolutely loved the look he had put on Edward's face, and he had a feeling he was going to like the one he would get in a few minutes as well.

"Little help, babe?" Jasper said softly, his hands at the waistband of Edward's trousers and boxers, pushing them gently. Edward's hands tangled with Jasper's as they eased his boxers and pants down, Edward fighting to kick them free once they were past his hips.

"Fuck, you're gorgeous," Jasper murmured into Edward's ear as he took him firmly in hand. He reached for the concealed bottle of lubricant he kept hidden in the space between the mattress and the wall. Jasper squirted some into his hand, and let it warm slightly before he once again took Edward's length into his hand. He worked him up slowly, letting Edward's movements set the pace and testing his reactions with his motions.

All the while Jasper kept dropping little kisses and nips along Edward's neck, shoulders and collarbones, reveling in the sounds Edward was making. Quiet breathy moans were slipping past Edward's lips as his hips rose to meet Jasper's hand, the movie forgotten.

Edward came with a quiet plea of Jasper's name, his release spilling over Jasper's hand and onto his bare body. Jasper held him close as he rode out the aftershocks, continuing to kiss him softly until his breathing evened out and his heartbeat slowed.

Jasper's erection was making his own slacks uncomfortably tight, the feel of Edward against him having fueled his own arousal. Edward kissed Jasper's chin, at an awkward angle still reclined against Jasper's chest.

He shifted then, twisting slightly and climbing onto his knees, finally kicking his trousers completely free as he turned to face Jasper. "You're wearing too many clothes," Edward said softly. "Especially considering I'm naked."

Jasper grinned. "You look better naked than I do."

Edward snorted and kissed Jasper, one hand sliding up his chest under Jasper's shirt, the other threading through the hair at the back of Jasper's head. Jasper returned the kiss, moaning softly as Edward's hand wandered skimming up his sternum before his palm rested flat against Jasper's chest, over his hammering heartbeat.

"Off," Edward whispered against Jasper's lips, and Jasper raised his hands so Edward could strip off his hoodie and t-shirt.

Jasper closed his eyes as the tops passed over his head. He felt fingers trace over the lines of scars across his chest and upper arms before Edward's lips caught his again. Jasper skimmed his fingers along Edward's spine, and smiled as he felt him shiver from the feather light touch. Jasper's eyes blinked open when Edward sat back slightly. He took in the light dusting of hair across Edward's chest, and the matching trail below his belly button as Edward sought to find a more comfortable position. "Edward, you don't have to…"

"Hush," Edward said, cutting him off. He sat back on his haunches with a wince that quickly faded. "Take off your pants."

Jasper kissed him again, though his hands went to the button and fly of his trousers. He lifted his hips to slide them down, and he arched into Edward's hand when the other man touched him. As Edward wrapped his hand around him and started to stroke, Jasper's breath caught and he moaned softly. It didn't take long for him to find his release, Edward's name joining a rush of words as his orgasm overtook him.

While he fought to get his breathing back under control, Edward kissed his face, his lips brushing over Jasper's forehead, cheekbones, eyelids and finally lips. Jasper smiled at him softly before he shifted toward the edge of the bed. He rose, kicking his pants across the small room and stalked naked to the bathroom, knowing Emmett was at Rose's, and got a cloth damp with warm water. Along with a dry towel, Jasper returned to his room where Edward was sitting on the bed, having unfolded out of his crouch, pain clearly written on his features. Before he returned to the bed he pulled two clean pairs of boxers from his drawer and laid them at the end of the bed.

"You're hurting," Jasper said softly as he gently wiped Edward clean. His lover's eyes were tightly closed, lines radiating from the lids. They should have been laugh lines, not lines of pain on a man so young.

"I'll be okay, "Edward whispered. A small crooked smile graced his lips. "It was worth it."

Jasper laughed quietly, shaking his head. He kissed Edward softly and dried him off before quickly wiping himself down. He tossed the towels toward the hamper and joined Edward on the bed, sitting perpendicular to him so Edward's legs were across Jasper's lap. He began to slowly massage Edward's right leg, not using a lot of pressure, mostly just running his warm hands over the limb.

Edward sighed softly. "That feels familiar."

Jasper smiled fondly. "When you were ill, you were shifting around a lot in your sleep. I didn't want to wake you up to take pain medication, but you seemed to calm down a bit when I did this," he explained. "Is it helping?"

Edward nodded. "It helps me relax, which eases the pain somewhat."

Jasper leaned over and kissed him again softly. "What else can I do?"

Edward took a deep breath and let it out slowly, his eyes opening and focusing clearly on Jasper. "Nothing." He smiled softly. "It's bearable now."

Jasper returned the smile and his hands stilled. After a moment he slipped out from under Edward's legs and reached for the clean underwear he'd retrieved, handing a pair to Edward. They dressed, Edward a bit more slowly and Jasper turned down the covers and tucked his laptop away and they returned to the bed, Jasper's back against the wall and Edward's back against Jasper's chest as they spooned up together, the only way they'd both fit in the twin sized bed.

"I'm glad you decided to come stay with me this weekend," Edward said softly, covering Jasper's hands with his own.

"It'll be nice to not have to worry about dumping you onto the floor," Jasper teased, kissing the back of his neck.

Edward laughed. They were quiet for a few moments until Edward spoke again. "Jas?"

"Hm?" Jasper nosed at the soft hair at the base of Edward's skull, smiling at the way Edward was fidgeting with their fingers.

"Will you tell me what happened when you were discharged?" The request was softly voiced and Jasper could sense Edward's hesitation in the sudden tension in Edward's shoulders.

"Yeah," Jasper breathed, kissing his shoulder. He reminded himself that it was Edward he was speaking to, that he trusted Edward and that he deserved the full truth. After all, Edward had confided in him about what had caused his withdrawal from society, and it was only fair that Jasper do the same.

"I joined the Corps straight out of high school," Jasper said quietly. "It was partly to fulfill a promise to my father, but I just always knew that I was going to serve. I think it broke my mama's heart when I left for boot camp just two weeks after graduation, but I couldn't stay there any longer.

"I knew going in that I had to hide my sexual orientation. It wasn't too difficult. I made friends, but after Darryl, I wasn't looking for anything. I got through boot and was assigned to a unit based in Camp Lejeune in North Carolina.

"There was a female member of my unit – Maria – who wouldn't take no for an answer. Beyond fraternization rules, she wouldn't have been my type if I did like women. She pursued me for months. I nearly reported her at one point, but she stopped suddenly. At the time I thought she'd found someone else that caught her eye. In reality, she'd just retreated to regroup, like any good soldier."

Jasper paused in his story, resting his chin on Edward's shoulder. He breathed deeply, drawing on Edward's calm to refocus himself and dispel his anxiety.

"I was on leave in Philly. I was out of uniform, and anonymous within the city. I hit of a couple of clubs, had a good time. My last night in town, I went out to a club that had a pretty good reputation. I hadn't really planned to hook up with anyone, but Mark just kind of happened. Saturday night, busy club, I didn't think about the flashbulbs going off when he kissed me and dragged toward a back room. There were a bunch of parties going on around us, plus all the lights from the club itself. We had a quick fuck and he disappeared. I went back to my hotel to return to base the next day."

Jasper heard his tone change as he began to distance himself from what had happened. He'd never told anyone the full story, because he couldn't bear the memories it brought up. "Mark was a plant. Maria had followed me to Philly and figured out what I was doing over my first couple of days. She paid him to pick me up and got pictures of everything leading up to what happened behind the closed doors. I think her intension was to blackmail me, but she had proof in her hands that I would never want to be with her. Since she couldn't have me, she decided it would be better to ruin my life. So she turned me in. There was a hearing – Mark was brought in to testify, so were members of my unit, but the photos and Marks' testimony were more damning than the solid evidence from my unit that I was a good Marine, that I'd never brought my personal life into the unit, or that I'd not really formed any attachments beyond camaraderie with the men. I was discharged honorably under 'Don't Ask Don't Tell,' which is equivalent to a medical discharge. It was one of the lowest fucking moments in my life, to be told that my government didn't want my service, that I was 'disabled' because I prefer men. I knew it was bullshit but that didn't mean it didn't still hurt. Maria turned out to be karma's bitch; she was court martialed for conduct unbecoming and was also discharged."

During the retelling, Jasper's eyes had closed and he'd spoken the words quietly into Edward's skin. Images of his court martial hearing haunted him, the feeling of utter hopelessness upon his discharge, knowing he had nowhere to go, no family to take him back in rose up from where he'd squashed them down ten years before. He choked on a quiet sob, biting it back as all those feelings of worthlessness and failure washed over him.

"Sh," Edward's voice sounded near his ear. He'd turned around in Jasper's arms and was holding him, one arm around his waist, the other in Jasper's hair, combing lightly. "You're not alone. You're not alone," Edward repeated quietly. His breath washed across Jasper's cheek until Jasper ducked his head and hid his face in Edward's neck.

"Remember what you told Bella a couple weeks ago?" Edward spoke quietly, his hand moving lightly up and down Jasper's spine. "You said 'you've got this fantastic family that was willing to take both of us lost souls in, and they're not going to let you go.' Do you remember that, Jasper?"

Jasper nodded, tears he refused to let fall clogged his throat, rendering him mute.

"I'm not going to let you go," Edward whispered. "Esme and Bella and Emmett and Alice and Rose and Carlisle aren't going to let you go. You don't ever have to be alone like that again." He kissed the top of Jasper's head and just held him while Jasper worked to calm himself down, whispering quiet words.

It took Jasper a while to calm himself down enough to where he could speak again. "I felt worthless when I got back home to Texas," he said quietly, his voice rough and thick, his accent sounding heavy even to his own ears. "It felt like I'd failed at the only thing I'd ever wanted, but there was nothing to go home to."

"You didn't fail, love," Edward said in the same hushed tone Jasper had been using.

Jasper nodded. "It took me awhile to figure that out and move on. It was hard, having no one really to turn to. Mama had died six months earlier, and it'd only been a couple years since we lost Dad and Amber. I couldn't really trust people after that, so I just closed myself off. I bummed around for a while; I got back in September and had to wait for the spring semester to start. I went back to my parents' house, but it was only a week before I couldn't bear to be there anymore. I sold the house and moved to College Station to attend A&M. I hardly talked to anyone that I didn't have to. I was lonely, but I wouldn't get hurt that way."

Edward "hmm'ed" his agreement, and Jasper knew he understood the feeling.

"There were a few people I could count on as friends, once I was in graduate school. Other TAs in my program, though we were never particularly close. We went out for drinks every so often, and sometimes we'd study together or proofread each other's work, but it was enough for me. Ethan wormed his way past my defenses while I was working on the early stages of my dissertation. When he started to sound too much like Darryl I bolted. I haven't been with anyone seriously since. I haven't really attempted to make friends, until I moved here, though I firmly blame your mother and brother for that," he managed to say lightly.

Edward laughed softly. "They are good for that." He hugged Jasper tight and brushed his lips over Jasper's ear. "I'm glad that you've opened up with us. I'm so sorry that you've been hurt in the ways that you have, but know that none of us will ever hurt you on purpose. And I'm _not_ going to let you go."

Jasper finally lifted his head from where he'd rested it in the crook of Edward's neck and kissed Edward deeply. It wasn't a kiss to fuel passion, but Jasper let all the hope, affection, and gratitude he felt for Edward pour into the action. Edward's hands were gentle against his back as he returned the kiss, making small circles against the base of his spine.

He met and held Edward's gaze when they broke the kiss. They didn't need further words. Jasper shifted, drawing Edward just a bit closer as his eyes drifted closed. He heard Edward's soft voice humming quietly as his hands continued to soothe Jasper's skin. It didn't take long for Jasper to drift into an exhausted slumber, wrapped firmly in Edward's embrace.

The room was illuminated by muted sunshine when Jasper woke the next morning. Somehow during the night they'd repositioned themselves and were in the same places they normally were when they fell asleep together. Jasper was on his back, his left arm flung over his head. Edward was curled onto his left side, his head on Jasper's shoulder, his right arm draped over Jasper's body, their legs a tangled mess.

Edward's features had smoothed out in sleep, revealing a softer look that was unmarred by pain. Jasper hated to wake him, but he needed to take a piss and pack, because Esme was expecting them for brunch at the house by 12:30 and it was already after nine. Jasper knew Edward wasn't packed either.

"Edward?" Jasper said softly, brushing hair off Edward's forehead. "Babe, we've got to get up." Jasper could have just crawled over him and let Edward sleep, but he knew the other man could be slow to wake on bad days, and Jasper wouldn't be able to gauge if Edward was in pain or not until he was a bit closer to consciousness.

Edward showed no signs of stirring. With a fond smile, he kissed Edward softly and quickly, but gently, extricated himself from Edward's grip and climbed over him, somehow manage to get to his feet on the floor without knocking either of them out of bed. He used the facilities and plugged in the electric kettle he'd finally purchased before returning to try to rouse Edward again.

The bronze-haired man had rolled into the space Jasper had vacated, his face pressed into the pillow above where his arms had enveloped it.

Jasper perched on the edge of the bed, folding his right leg under him as he sat facing the window, his left leg hanging over the bed. He ran his hand up and down Edward's bare back, lightly tracing over the scar he knew had to be from surgery following his accident. "Edward?"

"Hm?"

Jasper smiled softly. "Wake up."

"No." The sound was muffled by the pillow, but the intent was clear.

"Alright. I'm gonna shower and get dressed," he said fondly, watching as Edward turned his head, though his eyes didn't open.

"Kay."

Jasper kissed him between his shoulder blades and rose, pulling fresh underwear from the drawer before moving back to the kitchenette. He set up his mug with the single-brew filter on top and poured the hot water over the grounds, leaving it to brew as he stepped into the bathroom. He took his time in the shower, letting the hot water ease his muscles tense from the previous evening's anxieties and emotional purge. He dried and dressed in just underwear and collected his coffee.

Edward was still stretched out on his stomach, though his face was turned to the room instead of buried in Jasper's pillow. Jasper dressed in a pair of clean jeans that were worn near the point of being unwearable. He figured he had a few more times before the seams started giving out or he wore through the knees and ass completely. He tugged on a long-sleeved t-shirt and a pair of socks before moving to sit on the bed again.

"Edward?"

"Hm?"

Jasper smirked. "Wake up." He found that he wasn't quite able to resist having his hands on Edward as he lightly stroked his back.

"I'm 'wake." Edward muttered.

"Sure you are," Jasper teased.

Edward sighed and his eyes blinked open. They were clear and bright green, and the lines around them softened as he smiled. "Morning."

"Good morning," Jasper said softly.

Edward didn't move to get up, though he did some kind of slide/crawl maneuver that allowed him to snuggle up to Jasper, resting his head on Jasper's thigh. He sighed again quietly, humming a little at the end, in contentment, Jasper realized.

"Not much of a morning person?" Jasper teased as he played with a few strands of Edward's hair. He knew that wasn't true; Edward was pretty much an anytime person.

"Not when there's no reason to get up."

"Brunch at your parents'?" Jasper asked.

"Psh," Edward scoffed, sounding a bit like Esme. "They'd understand." But a heart beat later, Edward pulled himself up into a sitting position, draping his arm around Jasper's waist. "Going to share?" He asked, reaching for Jasper's coffee.

Jasper let him take it. Edward made a face as he sipped at the black coffee then handed it back. "Can I use your shower?" Edward asked.

Jasper nodded. "I think I have some clothes that will fit you." He handed his mug back to Edward and rose, crossing to the wardrobe and grabbing a clean towel for Edward to use.

Edward limped off to the shower and Jasper started pulling together things he'd need for the week. His laundry was already contained in the basket and he had a feeling he was going to lose the battle with Esme about doing his own wash at her home. Once his clothes were clean, he wouldn't need much else, so he only made sure he grabbed his trainers, planning on wearing his boots and knowing those would do for just about any situation that might come up in the next week.

Besides his laundry, the only thing Jasper intended to take with him was his laptop so he could try to get some work done over the holiday week. He had six final exams to prep, with review materials and the lessons leading up to the exams. Jasper wasn't one to put things off, but as the semester dragged on, it got harder and harder to plan more than a day or two ahead, and he didn't like that.

Edward emerged from the shower, his hair a damp mess from being toweled dry, the towel wrapped around his hips. Jasper rose from where he was sitting on the bed and retrieved another pair of boxers and some pants for Edward and handed them over with a kiss. "Coffee?"

"Yes, please," Edward answered.

Jasper returned to the kitchenette and prepared another cup for Edward, doctoring it up with milk and sugar from Emmett's side of the pantry. When he returned, Edward was dressed in a pair of flannel sleep pants and one of Jasper's hoodies from the laundry basket. "I don't think we'll be able to ever consolidate wardrobes," Edward teased as he accepted the mug, the discarded pants thrown over the end of the bed. "At least not bottoms."

"Oh well," Jasper said, embracing Edward from behind. Edward's statement about the future hadn't freaked him, and the realization made him pause for a moment. Jasper held him for a few moments, eventually kissing his neck and moving away to make sure he had everything while Edward finished his coffee and gathered his clothes from the previous evening.

Jasper rinsed their mugs and hefted the laundry basket and laptop, carrying them to Edward's car, parked in the faculty lot behind his building. They walked together to Edward's room where Edward changed into his own clothes and gathered what he needed for the week after taking what Jasper assumed was his pain medication for the day. Jasper carried what Edward would let him (the laundry bag) and they went back to Edward's car and set off for the Cullen house.

Brunch was a typical Cullen affair, and Jasper smiled to realize that he was familiar enough with them to actually think that. After the meal he did lose the argument about doing his own wash, and he watched Carlisle fight off laughter as his wife guilt-tripped Jasper into letting her wash his clothes. Esme just looked excited to have a full house and though he argued with her, it was mostly in fun.

Saturday afternoon, Jasper and Edward spent talking quietly on the back patio, though it was cold and blustery. They bundled up and shared one of the lounge chairs as they spoke more about Jasper's tour in the Marine's and Edward's time with the symphony. It felt good to finally speak to someone who at least partially understood how painful it was, and Jasper was glad that they waited to talk until they were someplace more neutral than his bedroom on campus. Though the emotions he'd fought so long to suppress found their way back to the surface, it wasn't as painful with Edward there to talk to him quietly. As they talked, Esme kept them in warm drinks, and Jasper began to feel a bit of the hole inside of him close up. It almost seemed like through Edward's gentle touch and soft words he was imparting some of his strength onto Jasper, and he latched on to it like a drowning man at a life preserver.

It was in those moments, wrapped up on the back porch, sipping warm lemonade, that Jasper realized how much he needed Edward Cullen in his life, and how perilously close he was to falling in love with the man. The thought didn't scare him; it gave him hope.

In the evening, after another fabulous Esme cooked meal (Jasper decided he was going to have to go for a run around the neighborhood every morning if he was going to keep off the 20 pounds he was sure he'd gain by eating so well for a week straight), they gathered in the living room for a video game tournament, playing various quiz games so everyone could participate. Bella and Edward dominated general knowledge, while Rosalie, Alice, and surprisingly Carlisle aced all the movie trivia when they played Scene-It.

That night, Jasper and Edward slept wrapped around each other with no fear of rolling one or the other onto the floor, and it was the best night sleep Jasper had had in a long time.

On Sunday, everyone gathered to watch football. Alice did so with her sketch pad in her lap, and Bella with a ball of yarn and one of her hook thingies. She said she was making a blanket for charity, and Jasper found himself easily captivated watching her work the yarn into a pattern as she watched the screen. As Jasper's only hobby was reading, he pretty much focused on the game, when he wasn't watching Bella's hands.

Since Esme and Carlisle were both still working on Monday (Esme at the school on a half day, Carlisle taking shifts in the local ER to give the regular doctors a holiday because they had to work Thanksgiving), everyone slept in and fended for themselves for breakfast. Someone had already started a pot of coffee by the time Jasper stumbled downstairs in freshly laundered jeans and one of Edward's t-shirts from a university band tour. After spending three nights with Edward, Jasper was discovering his lover preferred to lie-in whenever possible, even if he wasn't sleeping. It was kind of cute.

"You know," Edward said, pulling Jasper aside into the hallway as they headed into dinner Monday night. "If I'd known you were going to spend all week with my family, I'd never have invited you home." Edward grinned and kissed Jasper lightly. "I haven't seen you all day."

"They kidnapped me?" Jasper offered up in his defense. Rose had driven to the school in the morning to get his car so she could check it out and service it. Alice dragged him back down to the studio for something or other he hadn't quite caught at the time, and until dinner had been called by the girls (who gave Esme the night off from cooking), had been playing video games with Emmett. "Besides, it's not like you were trying to track me down, Mr. Pianoman," Jasper teased. Edward had spent a fair portion of the day in the small music den, working on something.

"True enough," Edward conceded. "What's up for tomorrow?" he asked as they went into the dining room.

"Bella and I are going to Seattle. You're welcome to join us," Jasper offered, glancing at Bella and getting a nod in return.

"It's alright. I have a couple of appointments in the morning and don't want to hold you up," Edward explained. The expression Jasper saw in his eyes indicated that he probably wouldn't be good company afterwards, either.

"We can go another time, or I can take Alice," Bella said, apparently seeing the same thing Jasper had.

Edward rolled his eyes and shook his head. "No, you guys should go and have fun. Jasper I know you've been wanting to go to Seattle for awhile, and Bella's a great choice for a tour guide."

Jasper gave in, but shot Edward a look that said they'd be discussing it later, pretending not to notice the glances they were getting from the rest of the family. Dinner otherwise passed as normal as possible in the Cullen dining room with a food fight between Alice and Emmett being narrowly averted by Esme.

After dinner everyone split up to their own pursuits and Jasper and Edward found themselves once again on the back patio while Edward smoked.

"I would stay, you know," Jasper said. "If you need me to."

"I know," Edward answered. "Dad's going with me. I don't know how long we'll be, and you really should go with Bella. She needs you too."

Jasper rose from the lounge he was well, lounging in, and stepped behind Edward, wrapping his arms around Edward's waist. "Will you do something for me, then?" Jasper said softly in Edward's ear.

"I can try, love," Edward responded.

"Talk to me, when I get back. Don't let whatever you find out eat at you like the last time. Let me be here for you, Edward."Jasper wasn't above pleading if it kept Edward from shutting completely down or lashing out. "You're not alone either."

Edward nodded before turning in Jasper's arms and kissing him softly.

"Thank you," Jasper breathed, his hands resting on the base of Edward's spine as Edward leaned into him.

"I'm a bit scared," Edward admitted barely above a whisper.

Jasper guided them back toward the lounge and wrapped Edward up with him in the quilt he'd started dragging out with them. "Of what?" he asked after they settled on the chair that was hardly big enough for one of them, let alone both. But he sat behind Edward and wrapped his arms around Edward's waist and they made it work.

"Of what they might find. Or not find," Edward said softly. His vulnerability tore at Jasper.

"What are you having done?" He asked, capturing Edward's hands with his own and resting them against Edward's stomach.

"Tests," Edward answered. "The pain's been getting worse, and spreading, and I hope they can figure out why. I'm getting an MRI and take some x-rays," he explained quietly.

Jasper rested his chin on Edward's shoulder. "How bad has it been?" Jasper knew Edward was very good at concealing his discomfort, especially around people he didn't want to worry, namely, his family. He also worried about how long it had been going on, since Edward was so good at hiding his pain.

"Pretty bad. I haven't tried to manage on my own for a week or so, now, but I'm still trying to stay off the narcotics as much as possible." He sighed and leaned his head back against Jasper's shoulder. "Unfortunately, they're the only things that really work, most days."

"Why are you so hesitant to use something that will make you feel better?" Jasper asked.

Edward sighed quietly and toyed with their fingers. "Carlisle's parents were alcoholics, and I don't want to risk the chance of getting hooked. I don't want to put my family through that."

"Edward," Jasper sighed.

"I know," Edward interrupted softly. "Responsible use for pain management under a doctor's supervision is safe. I've been told so a dozen or more times by my doctors and my father. But if I could manage my pain without them, then I'd be in control. It would be one less thing I have to rely on to get through my day."

Jasper understood how significant that was for Edward. He needed something in his life that he controlled, rather than something that controlled him the way pain medication could. It was, Jasper believed, what had driven Edward so hard to learn to walk again – the need to be the strong independent young man he'd been before a drunk driver had taken that away.

"I do understand, Edward, but being in pain all the time has got to be wearing you down," Jasper chided softly. He thought back to the mid-semester holiday and how miserable Edward had been for the week and half after, when a secondary illness set it. He wanted to turn Edward around to face him and trace his fingers over the tiny creases that were already setting around Edward's eyes and mouth, probably unnoticeable to anyone that didn't spend most of their time watching him. He wanted to convince Edward to take the drugs and find some respite from the near constant pain, but in that, he knew, he'd probably be pushing too far, and he didn't want to start a fight.

"Will you at least tell me how I can help?" Jasper asked, not letting Edward address his previous comment. "I don't like seeing you in pain."

Edward nodded. "I did some meditation training last year that worked pretty well. I'm going to try to get back to the classes, if you'd like to come with me?"

Jasper smiled softly and kissed the corner of Edward's mouth. "I would like that very much."

A bit of tension seemed to ease up on Edward after that, and he relaxed more completely against Jasper. They talked for a bit longer; Edward mostly describing the tests he'd be going through and what he was worried about while Jasper patiently listened and gave all the support he could. Part of him still wanted to stay behind and be with Edward for his appointment, but he understood Edward's need to do it on his own (more or less) so that he'd have time to compose himself before having to tell anyone the outcome.

However, as Edward talked and purged his worries and fears, Jasper felt them creep into him and settle somewhere in the region of his chest, making his heart clench and made Jasper feel like he was struggling to breathe. He shoved it all down, focusing on supporting Edward and not how terrified he truly was that something bad was going to happen and how that thought just increased how worried he really was.

After they'd gone upstairs and changed for bed, Jasper lay for a long time, feeling Edward slide into sleep next to him. Jasper's thoughts were consumed by the man beside him and what the next day would bring. He once again realized how close he was to falling in love with Edward, if he wasn't there already. He'd do anything to save Edward the anxiety and fear he'd confessed to, and he wasn't sure that he'd be able bear it if the news was as bad as Edward feared.

Unable to sleep, Jasper finally extricated himself from Edward's grasp with gentle kiss to his forehead and padded downstairs to find something to occupy himself through the night.

* * *

See why I was so excited for this chapter? Many questions were answered, I hope.

I hope the first note didn't frighten anyone about the length of this story; I'm currently working on chapter 28, and there looks to be more than fifty if things progress as plotted.

I'm also thinking about working on an outtake for the For the Love of Jasper contest. I won't make any promises, but if there's something you'd like to see, let me know in your review. I'll see what I'll be able to do.

Next chapter should be up on Monday/Tuesday next week; we're back to the regular weekly posting schedule for awhile.


	20. Chapter 19: The Sleepless go to Seattle

**Thanks to everyone for your great reviews. I'm glad you all ended up being as excited for the chapter as I was. ^_^**

**As always, Naelany and wishingforlove get my thanks for their beta efforts.**

**Here's a bit of Jasper and Bella bonding time!**

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Bella woke to the quiet alarm of her cell phone on Tuesday morning. It was early; she and Jasper were planning on being on the road by 6 to make it to Seattle around 9. Bella tried to roll over so she could get out of bed, but Alice was wrapped around her. Like they had the nights before, she and Alice had apparently gravitated toward each other in their sleep. Bella was on her back and Alice's arms were around Bella's waist, her head nestled against Bella's chest, her face turned up just enough so she could breathe.

Smiling softly, Bella ran her hands through Alice's short hair and gently coaxed her onto her back before she slid out of the bed and pulled the duvet up from where it had slipped to the floor during the night. Alice sighed once, turned onto her stomach, hugged Bella's pillow close and went back to sleep.

Bella showered quickly and dressed in casual clothes, jeans, a long sleeved t-shirt and an old logo tee on top. She pulled her hair up into a bun, not wanting to deal with it, and made her way downstairs after putting on socks.

She found Jasper on the couch in sweatpants and a hoodie she recognized as belonging to Edward. His socked feet were propped up on the coffee table and he had a mug cradled between his hands as he watched some old movie on the television.

"Good morning," she greeted him quietly as she went into the kitchen for a mug and to make tea.

"Mornin'," Jasper answered, not looking up.

She popped her mug into the microwave since it was too early to heat a whole pot of water; Esme and sometimes Carlisle, usually joined her for morning tea, but Bella would just have the one cup and she could grab something on the road later. When she returned to the living room after a few minutes, Jasper didn't appear to have moved.

"Rough night?" she asked softly, settling next to him on the couch, snuggling into his side and resting her head on his shoulder.

Jasper raised his left arm so she could fit underneath and wrapped it around her shoulders. "Couldn't sleep."

"Worried?" Bella was usually capable of speaking beyond two word sentences, but Jasper didn't seem inclined to speak any more than that.

"Yeah," he answered softly.

They watched the television in silence for a bit, Jasper eventually handing Bella the remote so she could flip channels. She did, settling on one of news programs out of Seattle.

"We could go another day," she offered into the quiet.

Jasper shook his head. "I'll just sit around here and worry. At least going out I'll have some hope of distracting myself."

Bella smiled warmly and hugged him hard around the waist. "It'll be fine."

Jasper let out a breath and rested his cheek on top of her head. "I wish I could believe that so easily, darlin'. It's hard to have faith when you've gone so long without anything to believe in."

"I'll try to do enough for the both of us then, alright?" She flashed him a warm smile as he hugged her a little bit tighter. She'd just about finished her cup when Jasper squeezed her hand again and rose.

"I'm going to run upstairs and make myself presentable to the public. Are you ready or do you need more time before we leave?"

Bella knew he wasn't in a big hurry to leave and that he'd want to spend a little time with Edward before they hit the road. "I just need to find my purse, but I'm in no hurry," she said. She scooted forward and put her mug on the coffee table and shifted herself into Jasper's lap. Bella wrapped her arms around his neck and kissed his cheek. "Take your time," she said quietly, feeling him embrace her in return. "He'll want something good to think about today."

"Thanks, Bells," Jasper said quietly, kissing her forehead before hugging her again and shifting her onto the couch so he could bolt upstairs.

Her purse was hanging under her coat in the front hall, so Bella carried their mugs back into the kitchen, refilled hers with orange juice and went back to the couch to watch television. She kept the volume low, not wanting to wake Carlisle and Esme, just down the hall.

Jasper came back down about 45 minutes later in well worn and faded jeans and another of Edward's hoodies. She couldn't help but smile at the way the two subtly stole each other's clothes, thinking no one noticed. She supposed it was understandable for the day, however, and refrained from teasing him about it.

"Did you want breakfast?" she asked as he dropped back onto the couch to tug on his shoes.

He shook his head. "It's too early for me."

"Okay." She smiled and stood. "Ready?"

"As I'll ever be," he teased, standing.

Bella retrieved her jacket and her purse, fishing out her keys and handing them over to Jasper. "Wanna drive?"

"You sure?" Jasper plucked the keys from her hand.

"I don't really like driving in the city," she explained. "I'm awesome at navigating, though."

Jasper smirked. "I knew you had ulterior motives for bringing me along."

"Damn straight, Skippy," Bella said on a laugh. "Driver, bag carrier, heavy lifter."

"I see how it's going to be. Just for that, Sexy Swan, we're stopping wherever I want for breakfast."

Bella felt her face heat up at the nickname some of the students had given her. "I'm not sure your boyfriend would appreciate you talking about me like that," she said.

Jasper laughed. "Who do you think told me about the nickname?"

"No!"

Jasper shushed her through his laughter. "No, it was Emmett."

That answer at least made sense. Edward wouldn't have embarrassed her that way on purpose. "Figures," she muttered. She opened the door and used the key from under the mat to lock up behind them.

Bella's car was a bright blue Mini Cooper, which she'd bought for herself when she'd successfully defended her dissertation. She loved it, but really did not like dealing with city traffic, even in the behemoth of the red Chevy she'd driven in high school.

Jasper had to adjust the seat before he could get behind the wheel and Bella giggled quietly as he bitched under his breath while adjusting the mirrors. They drove toward Seattle, Bella declaring she got to run the iPod since she was navigating, and Jasper gave only a token protest.

They stopped for breakfast in Port Angeles. Jasper broke his promise and let Bella choose where they ate, since she was more familiar with the area than he was. She guided him toward the Olympic Bagel Company that wasn't too far out of their way. They took a break from the car and ate inside, Jasper getting another coffee along with his bagel, while Bella just opted for juice.

The rest of the ride to Seattle was filled with comfortable chatter. When Jasper mentioned his favorite easy reading books as they were discussing literature, Bella almost let it spill about Izzy's true identity. However, she bit her tongue, knowing she could have a little fun at his expense in a few months.

"You know, she's visiting campus in the spring," Bella offered up casually.

"Really?" Jasper spared her a quick look, his blue eyes sparkling.

Bella nodded. "She comes as part of a seminar we do on creative writing." Bella found it odd to be talking about herself in the third person, but it worked. "She's great with the students. I'd be happy to introduce you."

"I'd really appreciate that, darlin'," Jasper said, grinning. "I'll have to make sure I get a ticket to that seminar."

"It's worth it, even if you're not much of a writer yourself. It's fascinating to listen to the authors speak about how they write and where they get their ideas." She smiled. She was looking forward to talking about how her own personal nightmare had given her new inspiration for her novel.

"Well then, that just leads to the next natural question," Jasper continued. "If you could have dinner with any three people, living or dead, who would they be and why?"

"Hm," Bella thought. "Cliché as it sounds, Jane Austen because I would want to hear from a woman novelist who wasn't really expected to publish anything, and to see how many of her stories were based on her life or those she knew. I'd want to know if there was a real Mr. Darcy," she said with a grin.

"That one doesn't surprise me," Jasper mused. "Who's next?"

"Abigail Adams," Bella decided. "Have you read her letters she wrote to her husband while he was in Philadelphia? She was brilliant and outspoken and I'd love to just sit down and talk with her about politics and family."

"I have read them," Jasper commented and Bella blushed, remembering who she was speaking to and he laughed at her softly. "And number three?"

"This is going to sound super cliché, but Oprah," Bella said with a roll of her eyes. "I know, I know, but she' such an influential person. I mean, people read something because she tells them, and follows diet plans because she said so. She runs an empire, and I would love to get inside her head for awhile."

Jasper grinned. "That is a bit…mundane," he answered. "But at least the reason is a good one. You didn't say so you could get fame and fortune."

Bella laughed. "Oh, don't get me wrong. I'd trot out some scarf or other and try to win her over and become one of her favorites and make a fortune."

Jasper laughed alongside her. "Can't blame you for that, darlin'," he drawled, still chuckling. "Take the chances where you can get them."

"How about you?" Bella asked, smiling and stretching slightly in her seat.

"Sam Houston was the governor of Texas before the state seceded from the Union and joined the CSA," Jasper explained. "I think he'd be fascinating to talk to about the secession and his reasons for opposing the timing of it. His early life was also extremely interesting, and the Texan boy in me wouldn't pass up the opportunity to sit down with such an influential person for the state's history."

Bella giggled. "Yeah, should have expected that one. Next?"

Jasper thought for a moment while changing lanes. "Henry Ford. He had some different political and economic ideas from others of his generation. Hitler admired him, which alone makes him interesting. He was against labor unions but pro worker, and he revolutionized mass production."

"Not to mention that whole issue of the anti-Semitism," Bella said dryly. "And last?"

"General Patton," Jasper answered quickly. "He was a well respected leader in North Africa during World War 2, since he had a reputation of having more soldiers under his command survive than others, even if he was a rough task master, fining troops to ensure hygiene. Even though he didn't get to participate in the Normandy invasion, he still was a leader and at one point, led his troops 100 miles in two days to end a siege on another American unit."

"And the soldier in you has a bit of hero worship," Bella teased.

"Maybe a bit," Jasper admitted. "I was fortunate not to face a combat situation, but I'd like to think that I'd have been in good hands with someone like him."

"Do you miss being in the service?" Bella asked gently.

Jasper shrugged. "Sometimes. When I was in, it was easy. Someone told me what to do and I did it. I had some small amount of authority over others, but still I mostly passed on commands from above. But I liked the work I was doing and I thought it was going to be my career; that I'd go on to officer training and eventually have a command and retire and write a tell all expose about being gay in the military." He winked.

Bella smiled. "It's strange, isn't it, how things seem to work out? Before my mom got sick, I was seriously reconsidering moving back to Phoenix. Well, Jacksonville, I guess. Anyway," she said with a shake of her head. "Away from La Push and Charlie. I felt smothered on the reservation; everyone was so close and knew everyone's business and I couldn't stand it. But then Renee was gone and I had no other choice. Otherwise I wouldn't have found my way here," she said with a small smile.

"I hear ya, darlin'," Jasper responded. "I regret the way things played out, but I think I'm finally starting to be happy."

Bella reached over and squeezed his forearm. "Oh, you want this exit," she said. They were headed for the Burke Museum on the University of Washington campus. Jasper had seemed really interested in the Natural History and Cultural exhibits the museum had to offer. Bella navigated them toward the campus and directed Jasper toward the parking lot that would be best, handing him cash for the ticket machine for a daily permit. He grumbled but took it, presumably because he couldn't reach his wallet at the moment.

Jasper parked and Bella got out of the car and stretched, glancing at her watch. "The museum doesn't open until 10. Want to grab a cup of coffee first?"

"Sure. Lead on," he said with a grin, extending his arm.

Bella wrapped her hand around his elbow with a smile and leaned into his body slightly. The café attached to the museum was open, and Bella led them in that direction. By the time they walked from the parking lot, it was nearly 10, but they stopped into the café anyway. Bella ordered a hot chocolate and Jasper got a small coffee. They sat in the café and chatted while they drank.

"Shall we?" Jasper offered his elbow again after they disposed of their cups.

"Of course." Bella smiled brightly up at him and took his arm. She thought she could get used to that kind of treatment. James never treated her much like a lady. He'd hold her hand occasionally in public, but nothing like Jasper or Edward, who made sure to open her doors or hold her chair (that was mostly Jasper) and just made her feel taken care of.

As expected, Jasper insisted on paying their admission. The Burke was currently hosting seven exhibits, and Bella and Jasper decided to just wander through them.

The first exhibit was one on the Alaska-Yukon-Pacific, called Indigenous Voices Reply. Among the historic objects, sixteen indigenous artists had contemporary works displayed. They lingered over some of the artifacts. Having spent several years living with her dad on the reservation at La Push, Bella understood the value the historical pieces held for the tribes they came from. She'd spent many hours with the young men and women of the Quileute tribe (or pack, as they sometimes referred to themselves) learning the stories of their elders. She recognized the designs on a few pieces from her time on the res and pointed them out to Jasper, explaining how she knew them and their stories.

The Coffee: the World in Your Cup exhibit was of slightly more interest to Jasper than Bella, since she tended to stay away from the stuff. She did enjoy the smell; one of the things she loved about living with Charlie was sitting in the kitchen and smelling his coffee brew every morning before school. They observed the pictures displayed as well as the live coffee plants. Jasper wrapped his arm loosely around Bella's waist as they watched the four videos and took a tour of the coffee bags on display.

After they Eyerdam exhibit of materials from the Solomon Islands, they made their way through The Tse-whit-zen village display, a collection of artifacts from the Klallam villages from along the Strait of Juan de Fuca. The village in Port Angeles was discovered under a century of industrial fill during the construction of a dry-dock project in 2003. Bella and Jasper worked their way slowly through the display, pointing out similarities they had seen in the AYP exhibit.

It had taken them several hours to make their way through the four exhibits and Bella was beginning to get hungry. "The other exhibits are permanent ones," she told Jasper. "I'm ready for lunch. How about you? We can always come back another time."

Jasper smiled. "Sure, darlin'. I'd like that."

"What would you like? There's several places within walking distance, depending on what you're in the mood for," Bella offered as they made their way toward the exit.

"Whatever you'd like, Bells. I'm not picky," Jasper responded.

"I picked breakfast," Bella argued, smirking. "Lunch is on you."

Jasper sighed, but she could see the grin lurking around his lips. "How about Thai?"

Bella nodded. "I haven't had good Thai in awhile. I know just the place, but we'll have to drive. It's a bit further from campus."

"No problem. Your car is a lot more fun to drive than mine is," Jasper said with a smile. They walked back to the parking lot in the drizzle and found the car. Bella directed Jasper down the street to the popular Thai place not far from campus.

They took their seats in Marlai Thai. Bella had almost forgotten it was a weekday until she saw the late-lunch crowd in the restaurant. Bella ordered Thai iced tea while Jasper just asked for water and an order of spring rolls as an appetizer. They took another few minutes to study the menu.

Bella smiled at Jasper as he set his menu aside. She decided on her meal and did the same. "How are you doing?" she asked quietly.

He shrugged. "Okay. Trying not to think too much about it, really, since there's nothing I can do right now."

She lightly touched the back of his hand. "Wanna talk about it?" she offered.

The waitress reappeared with their drinks and took down their orders. Bella ordered Pad Thai; Jasper ordered the Gang Karee, a chicken in yellow curry dish that sounded good, too. After the waitress left, Jasper began speaking quietly.

"I'm just worried that whatever he hears is going to make him shut everyone out again."

Bella reached across the table and took his hand. "I don't think that's going to be an issue."

Jasper shook his head. "He shuts me out as much as everyone else. I don't blame him for it; I can be the same way when things get tough and I need space to think. But I don't let things bottle up until my temper blows up at people."

Bella smiled softly. "He may shut you out initially, but you're the person he talks to, more than the rest of us. Back before Halloween, if you hadn't gone and kicked the proverbial shit out of him, it would have taken him weeks to get over it enough to apologize. He's got a temper, but he's also got a guilt complex a mile wide."

"Yeah, I noticed," Jasper said with a small smile. "But that's also why I'm so worried about this. I know he's sc-worried about what they're going to tell him, and he doesn't like to be a burden on anyone. It'd be just like him to hide how much it's affecting him until one of us, me, likely, works it out of him."

Bella squeezed his hand, making a note of how much Jasper had to care about Edward to protect his feelings about admitting that Edward was scared about the whole thing. "Jasper, believe me. He'll talk to you," she said with a small smile. She realized that was the second time that day she'd asked him to have faith in her.

He squeezed her hand back as their waitress brought their spring rolls. "I hope you're right, darlin'," he said quietly as the dish and a couple of small plates were set in front of them.

Bella patted his hand and reclaimed her own and split the spring rolls with him. They were fantastic, with a chili plum sauce for dipping.

"How are you doing with everything?" Jasper asked between bites.

She shrugged. "Alright. I haven't heard anything from James since Halloween, and I got that restraining order filed."

"That's good news. Have you heard anything about him?" Jasper asked, sitting back in his seat.

"Yeah. The DA pressed charges against him for trespassing, assault, and attempted rape. I'll have to testify, if he doesn't cop a plea. He's on administrative leave from the force." At Jasper's look she shrugged. "The assistant DA was friendly," she said with a grin.

Jasper laughed. "You flirted shamelessly with him, didn't you?"

"May-be," she drawled. "Anyway – I've taken to carrying pepper spray again, just in case, but I mostly feel safe on campus."

"It's good that you feel safe. Still interested in those self-defense lessons?" Jasper asked.

Bella towed with the straw in her tea. "Maybe. I'm sure it'd be useful for getting back into shape if nothing else. I'll let you know after finals and the holidays?"

"Sure," Jasper agreed. "You know where to find me," he said with a wink.

Bella giggled and shook her head. She had a feeling Jasper could be a flirt if he put his mind to it. Their waitress came back around with their meals, and they ate while carrying on more casual conversation. Jasper tried a bit of her Pad Thai and she sampled his chicken. While Bella had her leftover's boxed up, Jasper ordered an iced Thai coffee to go.

"Alright, m'dear," Jasper drawled as they emerged into the drizzle once more. "Where are we off to now?"

Bella smiled and linked her arm with Jasper's at the elbow. "Think you can handle doing a little yarn shopping? There are a few independent shops in town I'd like to visit."

"I'm all yours today," Jasper promised and they made their way back to the car.

Bella was surprised by Jasper's dedication to her for the day. Especially after their conversation at lunch, she knew he was worried and anxious about Edward, but he hadn't even pulled his phone from his pocket once all day. Bella wasn't sure she'd have that kind of restrained. And it wasn't like she wasn't worried also; she'd just made sure to have been in the ladies room when she checked her phone for any missed texts or calls that would have given her an update about what was going on.

Inside the city, Bella let her cell phone's Navigator lead them to their destinations. It was easier than fussing with internet directions because she hadn't known where they were going to be stopping. Bella had dubbed the navigating persona "Mr. Man," when she'd first started using it, and Jasper grumbled whenever he missed something and the phone uttered a snippy sounding "recalculating route." Bella just giggled, which seemed to irritate Jasper further, but she had the feeling it was all an act.

Bella spend about an hour each in three yarn stores in the city. Jasper was a trooper, carrying a basket and her bags and giving her opinions on colors and textures when she asked. Mostly he said he thought things matched or felt nice, but it was still nice to have a second opinion, even if he clearly had no idea what he was talking about.

It was early evening when Bella decided she'd reached her limit in terms of budget and space for the yarn she'd purchased and asked Jasper if there was anything else he wanted to see in the city while they were there.

"Point Mr. Man in the direction of a hobby shop, darlin', would you?" Jasper asked.

"What for?" Bella typed as she asked.

"I need a hobby," Jasper answered. "Y'all have things you do while you're watching TV and such, and I'm feelin' a bit left out."

"What did you have in mind?" Bella asked.

Jasper shrugged as he started the car, listening to the first set of instructions from the phone. "Don't know. I liked doing puzzles as a kid. I built a couple model cars, but never really got interested in it. I'm just thinkin' I should start small. There's not a lot of room in the dorms, and I don't think Esme would appreciate me taking over parts of her house."

Bella smiled and laughed. "Esme honestly wouldn't mind, you know that."

"Probably so," Jasper agreed. "Still, I'd feel guilty invading like that."

"Yeah, I know how you feel. My first semester here was strange. Esme was so inviting, Emmett and Alice welcomed me right away, and I got to know Carlisle early from my many incidents tripping over things in the rain. Rosalie took a bit to warm up to me, and Edward was just hard to read back then. So whenever Esme invited me to any of the family functions I got so tongue tied with anxiety about upsetting Rose and Edward that I pretty much tried to just keep my head down. It took awhile for me to figure out that they really did want me around and I wasn't invading their privacy."

"I expected the first Saturday dinner to be a lot more awkward than it was," Jasper admitted. "And I never thought that I'd find a family so willing to take me in."

Bella reached over and gave his forearm a squeeze. "Me either."

Jasper's phone rang then, and Bella pulled it from the cup holder where he'd put it while he was driving. "Text message from Edward," she read, flipping the phone open. She smiled softly as she read the message. "They're back, news not as bad as he thought, and he misses you." She could tell that Jasper was fighting to keep the huge smile off his face, though she saw a bit of tension leave his body as he sighed quietly.

"I think I'll put off the hobby shop for now, darlin', if it's alright with you?" Jasper asked quietly.

"Sure, Jas," Bella responded. "Let's just find someplace for a quick stop before we hit the road?" She wanted to use the restroom and get a snack so she would stay awake and be able to keep Jasper company on the three hour drive.

They made the three hour drive in two and a quarter.

Jasper expertly parked Bella's car in the tiny space allotted between Emmett's and Edward's in the street. "Thanks for today, Bella," Jasper said as they unloaded the trunk. "I had a good time."

"I did, too," she told him honestly. "It's not much fun going to museums alone, and I have to work to convince most people to go with me, unless it's Alice and art museum," she said lightly with a smile. She went up on tiptoe and kissed his cheek, reclaiming her bags from him. "Go on," she said quietly, shooing him inside. "I can manage these."

Jasper smirked. "I can be a gentleman for a few more minutes," he said with a slight roll of his eyes. "Give me those." He took her bags back and let her precede him into the house.

"You're back!" Alice declared from the couch. "How was your trip?"

"Successful," Bella answered, waving at the bags Jasper carried. "And we had a good time at the museum, too."

"That's fantastic, sweetheart," Esme said. "Food's still warm, if you're hungry."

"I'm okay," Bella said. "Jas, can you take those up to my room for me?" she asked, giving him the out he wouldn't ask for.

He gave her a thankful look and a nod. "Sure thing." He headed for the stairs, and Bella had a feeling they wouldn't be seeing much more of him for the evening.

Bella settled on the couch next to Alice and smiled as the smaller woman curled up next to her. "Where's everyone else?" she asked.

"Em and Rose went out. Carlisle's lurking around somewhere. You know where the boys are," she said with a grin.

"How'd it go today?" Bella asked quietly.

"I don't know. He was upstairs asleep when I got home. Carlisle checked on him, though." Alice shrugged. "He'll tell us when he's ready."

Bella nodded and hugged Alice with one arm. She was grateful that Edward had Jasper in his life, someone he could trust and talk to about things, but part of her couldn't help but be jealous and feel like she'd been replaced as Edward's best friend. She knew it was irrational; if she'd been the first upstairs, she was sure that Edward would have told her what was going on. But it bothered her a bit that Alice didn't know. "He didn't say anything?"

"Just that it wasn't what he expected and he was going to be fine." Alice didn't seem concerned, but then, she'd known Edward for longer. They were family. "You were worried."

"Yes," Bella answered. "After what he heard before Halloween, I wasn't expecting good news. But if he says he's going to be alright…"

Alice hugged her again. "He will be. You know how stubborn he is."

Bella laughed quietly and rested her cheek on Alice's head as they watched TV. "Yeah, I know." The rest of the evening passed quietly. As she suspected, they didn't see any signs of Jasper or Edward. She popped her head into Edward's room on her way to bed, though, and smiled softly. Edward looked peaceful and pain free, his head on Jasper's shoulder, his right hand on Jasper's chest, just over where his heart would be beating. Jasper was also asleep on his back, his face turned toward Edward, looking content. Bella was tempted to run down and get Alice so she could get another picture for the collection, but instead, she shut the door softly and padded down the hall.

* * *

I've not been to any of these places in Seattle. Info on the Burke exhibits is from their website. I found the Thai place through Google, and I used Ravelry to confirm some yarn shops in Seattle. There are some links on the blog.

Next chapter is Edward and the dr. appt. Teaser will be up at the blog!


	21. Chapter 20: Keeping the Lines Open

Thanks to drtammy1511 for her consult on this chapter.

As always, Naelany went through this with a fine toothed comb.

Readers, thanks for the great reviews. I love reading every one of them, and I hope I can keep up with replying to them all, because I enjoy it, but things are getting a bit nuts around here. That said, this is probably the last multi-post week for awhile. I'm getting into my reserve chapters while I work on a one-shot or two and get ready to move.

* * *

"Alright Edward, you can get dressed," Dr. Card said. "I'll be back in a few minutes."

"Thanks," Edward said dryly. It had been a long morning. After answering questions on everything from how much sleep he got at night to how his sexual function was, he was put through a number of physical tests he hadn't had to endure since the original injuries has put him in the hospital. He'd just been brought back from the MRI suite, dressed in a hospital gown.

He re-dressed in the jeans and t-shirts he'd tugged on that morning, and hobbled out into the hall to look for his father. He found him leaning against the wall, talking on his phone.

Carlisle looked up and nodded when Edward gestured toward the room where the nurses had parked him that morning.

Edward went back inside and climbed onto the bed, fiddling with his cane while he waited. He was anxious about what the test results said, and he was almost beginning to regret telling Jasper to go to Seattle with Bella. He could have used Jasper's calming presence.

"Edward?" His dad called after tapping on the door.

"Yeah, Dad." Edward looked up form where he was spinning his cane in the space between his legs.

"So?" Edward could read the open curiosity on his father's face.

"Don't know yet. He told me to get dressed and he'd be back." Edward sighed.

Carlisle crossed the room and grasped Edward's shoulder. "Be patient, Son."

"I'm trying." When it came to himself, Edward really had a problem being patient.

"Edward, Carlisle," Dr. Card greeted them as he re-entered the room, a file folder in his hands. He hooked a stool with his foot and sat down at the end of the bed Edward occupied.

"Good news and bad news for you, Edward," he began. "The pain you've been experiencing has been caused by some damage to your muscles due to repetitive stress," he explained. "It's nothing too serious, rest, ice, heat, and anti-inflammatories should help."

Edward let out a breath of relief. He could deal with that.

"Now, I have to warn you, Edward, this is something that will probably happen again. We're going to try to do a few things to prevent it, but I just want you to be aware of the fact that your body has weak points and it's not going to behave exactly like it used to. I'm honestly surprised we haven't seen an injury like this before. It also explains the decreased muscle mass in your right leg; you're not using it correctly and the muscles aren't keeping their tone."

Edward nodded. "Alright. So what do we do?"

"Take it easy for the next couple of days. Use ice packs to help bring down the inflammation in your back and then heat after a day or two to help relax the muscles. Try to stay off your feet as much as possible, and don't strain your back. No sexual activity for a week."

Edward grimaced at that. He had planned on utilizing the time he and Jasper would have alone on Wednesday. He sighed. "Okay, so no shopping on Friday. Alice will be disappointed, but she can deal." He caught his father's smirk, and he had a feeling Carlisle somehow knew he wasn't just thinking about Alice. "What about long term?"

Dr. Card laughed. "You could probably go shopping, if you're feeling up to it, just listen to what your body tells you and stop when you need to. Now," he continued, "You're going back into physical therapy," Dr. Card said, and his tone brokered no argument. "The damage has been caused by the way you walk to accommodate for the pain that you experience daily while walking or moving around. Despite the use of the cane, you've been putting extra unnecessary stress on your body, and it's finally starting to give out. Emmett has done a fantastic job of keeping you in shape, but it's not helping you overall. You need to get back with a professional who can help you start to realign the way you walk once again."

Edward nodded. "Okay."

"And you've got to start using the pain medication, Edward."Dr. Card slipped his glasses off and leveled his stare at Edward. "If you're in pain, you're going to be moving in ways that alleviate the pain, which in this case, caused the injury. Being in pain also increases your stress, and after the extended illness you described, I think you can understand why keeping your stress levels low is a good thing? It's not healthy and it will only continue to make things more difficult."

"Yeah," Edward said on a sigh. "Just…are there other options besides narcotics?"

"There are a couple of things we can try. Anti-inflammatories, like naproxen, Alleve, will help the muscle strain, but I think we'd have found an OTC treatment for long term pain management for you by now, if there was one that worked. But," he said, "I'm willing to negotiate with you." He paused. "You do have to consider the long term, though I understand your reluctance, given your family history. However, you have to find a way to manage your pain daily. Relying on your father for pain medication as needed isn't an effective treatment strategy."

"The meditation therapy was working," Edward protested. "Things just got out of control and I got out of practice."

"I'll make you a deal, then," Dr. Card said. "I'm going to give you an injection today, which should last for several days, but I still want you off your feet as much as possible until Friday, and take it easy after that. You have someone who can look after you?"

Carlisle cleared his throat. "He's staying at the house through the weekend."

"Good," Dr. Card said with a nod. "I want you to stop at the desk and schedule PT before you leave today. I'll write you a script for Celebrex, that I want you to start taking daily when the injection wears off. When I see you again in December, after a month of therapy, we can re-evaluate the meds. If you start feeling better, you can switch to an over the counter dose. But don't push it, Edward," Dr. Card warned. "Too much too fast, and you'll be right back here. But this is your chance to get back to whatever alternative pain management practices you want."

"Alright," Edward agreed. He had enough open time in his schedule that he should be able to do a day-time therapy appointment with no problems. Everything else seemed do-able.

"We'll see how things go with the PT and new pain medication, and whatever alternative methods you want to try."

Edward nodded. Everything seemed pretty straight forward, and the anxiety he'd been carrying for the last couple days seemed to be bleeding off.

"Alright. You get back to the meditation practice, go to PT, and start taking the prescribed painkillers. Every day. I also want you to start keeping a log to track your pain. You're too good at hiding your discomfort after all these years, Edward," Dr. Card said with a half smile. "And unless you're honest with me, we're going to keep ending up in pain, and I can't guarantee that you will be able to maintain enough function to keep walking if you don't start taking better care of yourself. And you should really quit smoking."

Edward nodded again, feeling like a little kid who'd been scolded for having too many cookies before dinner.

"Now, I couldn't help but notice your reaction to the order to refrain from sexual activity," Dr. Card said with a grin as he slipped his glasses back on. "There's someone that can help you will all of this? I know you've been managing a long time now, Edward, but sometimes it's easier to have someone that can take some of the burden off your shoulders."

"Yes, there is," Edward said quietly, unable to help the small smile.

"Good." Dr. Card made a note and closed the file. "Any questions for me?"

When Carlisle and Edward both responded negatively, Dr. Card reminded them of his contact information and said he'd be right back with a nurse to give Edward the shot he'd promised.

Within half an hour, Edward had set up his appointment for PT for early afternoons three days a week that wouldn't interfere with his lessons or rehearsals and they were on their way home. The car ride was quiet, Edward lost in his thoughts while Carlisle drove. The injection he'd been given had gone to work almost immediately which was a welcome relief as the constant pain receded to something more manageable.

It was nearly two by the time they got home; he'd been at the hospital for almost five fucking hours. Esme was the only one home, and he let her make him a sandwich, which he ate in the kitchen while filling her in on the news before going up to his room. He needed some time alone, and fortunately, fate was obliging him by making everyone out of the house (except the one person he really wanted to see). Other than Carlisle bringing up an ice pack, Edward was undisturbed after changing into sweats and a t-shirt and stretching out on the bed with his phone.

He hadn't even had a chance to text Jasper before he dozed off. His sleep the night before hadn't been as peaceful as he'd become used to, sleeping next to his boyfriend, and he realized after waking up a couple times for a few moments that Jasper hadn't been in bed with him.

Edward woke a few hours later, hazy evening light extending the shadows in his bedroom. He quickly sent a text to Jasper, and turned over to stare up at the ceiling after the message went through.

He reflected on Dr. Card's words as he stared off into space. He wasn't looking forward to taking daily pain medication because he hated the idea of being dependent on a substance, even if it was something he truly needed. He feared becoming physically and physiologically dependent on medication, of being turned into a stereotypical abuser. Edward knew he could count on his friends, family, and Jasper to be there for him and intervene if needed, but it was a risk he was unwilling to take. He wanted to believe that perhaps the PT and meditation might help him manage with something non-narcotic, but he also refused to get his hopes up.

But the doctor's words made sense. If he didn't start taking preventive measures to cope with his pain, he was going to find himself worse off physically, and it would only lead to longer and longer recovery times.

Edward sighed and ran his hand through his hair, thinking about Jasper. He wasn't sure how much he could ask of his boyfriend. Edward wasn't even sure if that was the right word anymore. Lover? Partner? They'd not declared themselves exclusive, and no formal declarations of love had been made, but Edward knew that his feelings for the blonde ran deep, and he knew that Jasper would do anything to help him (or anyone else in the family) if it were within his means of doing so.

But how much was too much to ask? Edward knew he'd get snippy if he asked Jasper to remind him to keep his pain journal like Dr. Card had asked, because after awhile, it'd only be a reminder of his fallacies. Edward was man enough to admit that would take his temper out on the nearest person, who would be Jasper, and who ultimately would endure it undeservedly.

Edward knew that he couldn't attempt to keep Jasper uninvolved. It wouldn't be fair to him or the family to take the burden on himself, because it would just shut him down again, to keep from lashing out in his frustration when it all began to overwhelm him, as he was sure it would. At least this time through therapy there'd be an end in sight; unlike when he was recovering from the accident when he'd had no idea what to expect from his body, this time there was a goal that he could meet, which he hoped would keep him from getting impatient and frustrated with himself again. He was also still independent; he could walk and care for himself and wouldn't have to be treated like a fucking toddler.

A soft knock at the door interrupted his musings. "Yes?" Edward called.

His father stepped through the door. "I brought you another ice pack," he said, brandishing a towel wrapped around something that was likely cold.

"Thanks." Edward turned onto his stomach and felt his father lift his shirt to lay the pack against his lower back.

"How're you doing, Edward?" Carlisle asked, perching on the edge of the bed.

"Okay. I'm not in any pain, anyway," Edward answered with a wry smirk.

Carlisle patted his shoulder. "If you need to talk, or have any questions, you know where to find me."

Edward's smirk softened. "I know, dad. Thanks."

"When should we expect Jasper and Bella back? And are you coming down for dinner?" Carlisle asked.

"Dunno. Bella had a full day planned. And no, I think I'm going to stay up here. I'm not hungry." He also wasn't quite ready to face the rest of the family yet.

"Alright." Carlisle rose. "Just holler if you need anything, son."

Edward nodded and heard his father's retreating footsteps and the soft click of the door closing. He reached for a pillow and wrapped his arms around it, not realizing until he inhaled that it was Jasper's pillow he had grabbed. He smiled softly as he rested his head, the pillow cradled between his arms. His thoughts wandered again, to Bella and the rest of his family and how he needed to tell them what has going on. He was sure they were all worried for him as well, even if most of them chose not to display it.

Edward must have dozed off again at some point, because the next thing he knew, the cold pack was being lifted from his back and a warm presence had settled on the bed next to him. Fingers combed through his hair and Edward felt himself relax just a bit more.

Jasper didn't say anything for a few minutes and Edward was content to lay there for a bit. Finally, Jasper rose, kissed Edward softly and crossed to his laundry basket shoved in the corner. He changed quickly into a pair of pajama bottoms and a waffle-knit shirt and disappeared into the bathroom for a minute. When he emerged he crossed to the bed, barefoot and perched on the edge near Edward.

"Do you need anything? 'Cause I'm going to crawl in there with you and I don't want to have to get up again for awhile."

Edward smiled and shook his head. "Esme will probably come check on us after awhile."

Jasper nodded his agreement and lithely slipped over Edward to 'his' side of the bed. He sat up against the headboard and Edward migrated closer to him, though he remained on his stomach. He watched Jasper's face carefully for a moment, seeing worry and affection etched into his features. But still, Jasper didn't push him to talk, despite Edward's promise the previous evening. They simply relaxed together for a few long minutes.

"So, I can't have sex with you for at least a week," Edward said suddenly into the silence.

"Uhm. Okay," Jasper answered, clearly confused. "I'm glad you're thinking about having sex with me, but I'm not sure I understand."

Edward chuckled softly, taking one of Jasper's hands in his own. "The doctor said the pain I've been experiencing is being caused by repetitive stress from the way I've been walking." He felt Jasper's exhalation and watched as he smiled softly.

"That's good, right?" Jasper asked quietly. "I mean, not really, because it's causing you pain, but it's something fixable."

Edward brought their combined hands to his lips and kissed Jasper's. "Yes. It's fixable. I've got to stay off my feet for the next couple days, but it'll heal."

Jasper's free hand brushed through Edward's hair. "What aren't you telling me?" he asked gently.

Edward sighed. "I have to go back to physical therapy," he explained. "Dr. Card thinks that this will keep happening unless I fix the way I walk."

"Is that a bad thing?" Jasper asked, frowning slightly.

"Not really, I guess." He just hated it.

Jasper laughed softly and kissed Edward's forehead. "You're far too stubborn to let something like PT beat you. So, what's the real issue there?"

Edward sighed softly and thought for a moment, putting his thoughts together. While he struggled to put his feelings into words, he stroked his thumb lightly over Jasper's knuckles. "Physical therapy is exhausting and frustrating and takes a very long time to see progress," he explained softly. He smiled softly up at Jasper. "Believe it or not, I've gotten kind of used to being more open with you and my family about things, and I'm worried that the process is going to turn me back into that person I was right after the accident."

He felt Jasper kiss the top of his head and rest his forehead against his crown. "Believe it or not, I think your family has gotten used to you being more open with things, too," Jasper said quietly, echoing Edward's words. "I don't think they're likely to let you slip back into that persona now that they've gotten you back."

Edward had a feeling that was true. "I couldn't bear to see the light go out from Esme's eyes again," he confessed quietly.

"Then trust in us to pull you back from the brink, Edward," Jasper urged softly. "No one wants to see you become that person again, either."

Another quiet knock at the door interrupted them, and Jasper called out for the person to enter.

Esme entered with a tray. "I brought you boys something to eat," she said, setting the tray down on the bureau next to Edward's bed. Edward turned his head and saw an assortment of easy finger foods and a couple of bottles of water. "You missed dinner."

"Thanks, mom," Edward said gratefully.

"You're welcome, sweetheart. Is there anything I can leave for you guys tomorrow? Bella and I will be out doing the shopping for Thanksgiving dinner and running some other errands."

Edward smirked. His mom and Bella had found an easy tradition; they went to brunch, did some shopping, and got the groceries for the big meal for Thursday. He knew Bella appreciated having the time to spend with someone she viewed as a mother and Edward liked that his mom finally had that daughter to dote upon.

"I can manage for us, I think, Esme," Jasper answered. "But thanks. You and Bella have fun tomorrow."

"We will," she answered with a smile. She kissed Japer's cheek and the top of Edward's head before mussing his hair even further. "Have a good evening, boys," she said quietly before she left.

Jasper reached for the tray and grabbed a bottle of water and one of the plates that contained two-bite brownies and set them within Edward's reach. "What else is bothering you, Edward?" Jasper asked. He lightly ran his fingers across Edward's shoulders.

"Something Dr. Card said," Edward answered. "That this is something that will probably happen again and that he was surprised that my body hadn't betrayed its weak points before this." He took a deep breath. "I thought I'd really come to terms with the flaws that I had; it took me a long time to accept my disabilities for myself. For my family, I was able to pretend that it was a blessing I was alive and more or less whole, while I internally raged about my fate. And to find out now, three years later, that there are still things I can't do correctly frustrates and upsets me."

"I'm not trying to patronize you," Jasper began, "but listen to me for a minute, alright?"

Edward nodded, reaching for one of the brownies.

"Given what you possibly expected to hear today, can you understand how this is kind of good news?" Jasper asked. "Christ, you have no idea how terrified I was that you were going to come back today needing surgery or something worse."

Edward hugged Jasper best he could, unused to hearing such naked vulnerability in the blonde, who always seemed to be everyone else's emotional rock.

"This injury is something completely fixable, Edward," Jasper said quietly, emotion thickening his accent a bit. "Yes, PT will be painful and frustrating, but Edward," he said earnestly. "It's not permanent damage. Your muscles aren't dying and you're not immediately facing the prospect of being unable to walk. It's a setback, yes, but fuck, Edward, can't you see that it's not as bad as it could have been?"

Edward shifted onto his back and into a sitting position in a smoother motion than was normally possible for him and wrapped his arms around Jasper, feeling the other man relax into the embrace. "You were really worried."

Jasper nodded against him. "I didn't sleep last night. Every time I closed my eyes my mind worked up the worst possible scenario. After you finally fell asleep I went downstairs to watch TV so I didn't bother anyone."

He didn't bother asking Jasper why he hadn't woken him, to talk about his worries. He knew the answer he'd get. But he'd also hid that worry well when he'd been there when Edward woke up in the morning; there'd only been a small trace of Jasper's anxiety when he'd kissed Edward goodbye before leaving with Bella.

"You should have said something," Edward admonished him softly.

"You had enough on your mind," Jasper responded. "But getting back to what I was saying, can you see the bright side? Even though Dr. Card thinks it'll happen again, think about how beneficial the PT could be. It'll be hard work, yes, but Edward, if they can adjust your gait, you might be able to rely less on your cane. Your balance issues may still be there and force you to use it, but as a support, not as a necessity. It's a small potential victory, but a potential victory nonetheless."

"I hadn't thought about it that way," Edward said slowly. He'd been so focused on what the immediate recovery steps were going to be that he hadn't thought about the long term effects. He also wasn't going to let Jasper discount his own feelings so easily, but for the moment, he let it go and focused on Jasper's words.

Jasper's laugh was soft. "I think you're a pessimist at heart, Edward Cullen. I don't mean that in a bad way, really, you just always seem to focus on the negative sides of things."

Edward thought about that for a moment and realized it was true. He shifted the plate of brownies back to the bureau and shifted back into a prone position on the mattress, tugging Jasper down with him. "You're right," he said, wriggling into the position he favored, pressed against Jasper's side with his head on Jasper's shoulder. "It's somehow easier to deal with disappointment and failure if there's no expectations to the contrary."

"Don't you think that's a…bleak way to live?" Jasper asked quietly, slipping his right arm out from under Edward's shoulder so his hand could sift through Edward's hair.

"Sometimes," Edward admitted. "But I've had enough disappointments that it kind of became second nature."

Jasper made a noise low in his throat but otherwise didn't speak. He brushed his fingers along Edward's neck and he shivered slightly. Edward kissed Jasper's clothed shoulder. They were quiet for a few minutes until Jasper finally spoke again.

"Do you feel still that way? That life is full of disappointments?"Jasper asked as he continued to stroke through Edward's hair, the gentle repetitive motion soothing.

"Things have started to look up recently," Edward answered quietly. "I'm happier than I have been in a long time," he confessed. "You've been a big part of that, Jas." He felt Jasper's lips in on his hair.

"I'm here for you Edward, in whatever capacity you need me," Jasper said softly, his voice laced with sleep. "You're not alone."

"You're not either, love," Edward reminded Jasper.

"You're going to let me help, right?" Jasper asked. "You're not going to force me to watch while you deal with this all on your own?"

Edward propped himself up on his elbow and kissed Jasper softly before holding his gaze. "I don't think I could if I wanted to."

Jasper smiled softly, his eyes warm and heavy lidded. He looked exhausted but happy and, dare Edward think it, loved and in love. "Thank you," he whispered.

Edward kissed him again. "Get some sleep, love," he urged Jasper, though it didn't appear that he needed much prompting. "You've had a long day."

"You're staying here with me?" Jasper's blue eyes closed and he was still smiling slightly.

"Where would I go?" Edward asked. He laughed softly. "I'm not supposed to leave the bed."

"Oh. Good." Jasper's eyes flitted open for a moment and he kissed Edward tenderly.

Edward lay back down with his head on Jasper's shoulder as the blonde's breathing deepened and evened out as he slid into sleep. Edward smiled and kissed his t-shirt clad shoulder once more before closing his eyes and drifting off to sleep, pain-free and happy in the moment. "I'm glad I found you, Jasper Whitlock," Edward whispered.

When Edward woke up Wednesday morning, he was alone, but Jasper's side of the bed was still warm, so he hadn't gone far. He turned carefully onto his back, pleased to find that he was still pain free, like the doctor had promised. He felt well rested and ready to face the day, and then immediately disappointed to know that he was going to have to spend it in bed.

"Good morning," Jasper greeted him, carrying two cups of coffee. He set them on the bureau and helped Edward sit up before handing him the coffee lightened with milk and sugar. "I spoke to your dad, before he left for his tee time," he said, sitting on the edge of the bed at Edward's waist. "You don't have to stay in bed, but once we get downstairs, you need to stay pretty much on the couch. I'm not supposed to let you move around too much."

"I can handle that," he assured Jasper. So long as he wouldn't have to stay in bed all day, he could be fairly content. "Everyone gone for the day?"

Jasper nodded around his coffee cup. "Esme and Bella took off for their day of fun a little while ago. Carlisle left earlier to meet up with his foursome. Alice is at her studio and Rose and Emmett are off doing their own thing." He smiled and kissed Edward softly. "We've got the house to ourselves again," he said with a waggle of his eyebrows.

Edward laughed. They both knew they couldn't do anything, but it was nice to be able to laugh about it. After they finished their coffee, Edward showered and tugged on clean sweats and a t-shirt and let Jasper help him downstairs. The nerve block the doctor had given him had put a temporary stop to the chronic pain he felt, but if he moved wrong, the abused muscles he was nursing screamed at him. By the time they reached the bottom of the stairs, Edward was beginning to rethink his feelings on staying in bed.

Jasper got Edward settled on the couch, bringing him another towel wrapped ice pack. Once it was in place, Jasper sat on the couch with Edward, placing a pillow on his thigh for Edward's head and they watched tv while Jasper combed his fingers through Edward's hair and they talked quietly.

The day passed quietly, with Jasper looking out for Edward's needs, keeping them fed and hydrated, helping Edward up when he needed it (including out to the lounger out back for a smoke, despite the slightly disappointed look on his face), and just making sure that he was relaxed. Edward dozed off a few times, but Jasper was never too far away whenever he woke up. The attention normally would have grated on Edward's nerves, but after their conversation the previous evening, he was trying to remember that Jasper cared about him and just wanted to make sure he was alright. He also knew that if he asked Jas to back off, he would have. But overall, he felt cared for and not smothered, since Jasper didn't hover, exactly, he was just _there_.

They were in the middle of an insufferable talk show with an overly perky host who apparently also cooked on the Food Network. "Why are we watching this?" Edward asked Jasper.

Jasper shrugged. "They mentioned something about burgers and I wanted to see what she was making," he answered as Bella and Esme returned.

"Jasper, sweetheart, can you help us carry in the bags?" Esme asked as she passed through, two paper bags in her arms. Bella followed behind her with another two, her maximum load lest she fall prey to her clumsiness.

"Of course," Jasper answered. He ran his fingers through Edward's hair one time and rose smoothly, stepping into a pair of Vans that Edward recognized as being from his own closet.

Even with Jasper helping, Edward watched, amused, as it took several trips for everything to be brought in. Esme and Bella had planned a meal for all eight of them, and it looked like they'd nearly bought out the store in order to feed them all.

Edward listened from the couch with a smile, as his mother, Jasper, and Bella bantered back and forth as they unloaded groceries and discussed the menu. It was the guys' responsibility to make breakfast and clean up in the morning before Esme and the girls started dinner. Esme was in charge of the turkey, Bella was on pies, and Alice would supervise while they all worked on the various side dishes. Thanksgiving had to be one of Edward's favorite holidays, not just for the food, but because of the comfortable way his family came together.

Though he had to admit, the food was good, too.

Jasper emerged with a slightly sad smile and the Chinese restaurant's take-out menu in his hand. "I'm glad your mom adopted me," Jasper said quietly as he resumed his seat with Edward. "She's making one of my mama's recipes tomorrow."

Edward smiled. That sounded like something completely Esme. She'd tracked down one of Rose's favorite family recipes shortly after she'd started dating Emmett, too. "How'd she find it?" He relaxed back against Jasper's thigh.

"Mama published a cookbook when I was younger. Esme found it in the bookstore she and Bella went to today," Jasper explained. He combed his fingers through Edward's hair again, and Edward was beginning to realize it was as comforting to Jasper as it was to himself. "I'm surprised she found it, really," Jasper mused, mostly to himself.

Edward had a sense that there was a little more research done on Esme, and probably Bella's part. But he wasn't going to let their secret out – they deserved their small victories as well. "I'm glad she found it," Edward said. "You look happier just thinking about the possibility."

Jasper smiled. "I am. I hadn't really thought about it, since it's been awhile since I've had an actual family Thanksgiving. It shouldn't surprise me that your mom did something like that, but I'm touched."

"Did you tell her that?" Edward asked. He knew how happy it would make Esme to know.

"Of course," Jasper said, bending slightly to kiss Edward softly. "What kind of cad do you take me for?" he teased.

"Hm, a gorgeous, brilliant blonde one?" Edward suggested.

Jasper laughed quietly and opened the menu. "We're apparently supposed to pick out two dishes for dinner tonight," he said, displaying it to Edward.

"Ah, family traditions," Edward said with a fond smile. "Since Esme cooks a big meal for Thanksgiving, we get take out and sit around and play board games the night before." Edward studied the menu.

"Is everyone going to pick two things?" Jasper asked, his brow furrowed. "That's a ton of food."

"You've eaten with Emmett and Alice," Edward commented.

"True." Jasper grinned.

"And we kind of just graze all night long," Edward said with a shrug. "It's good to have some options."

Jasper nodded his agreement. They picked out their four dishes and Jasper took the menu back into Esme, returning a few moments later, resettling on the couch. Carlisle came home a bit later, and after a quick shower and a check in with Esme, he gave Edward a quick once over and joined them on one of the chairs. Alice was next to arrive, dashing upstairs to scrub clay out of her hair (Edward wasn't sure he wanted to ask) and Rose and Emmett finally arrived with a mountain of food carried between the two of them.

Carlisle and Alice dug out the pile of board games from the closet and stacked them on the coffee table. Everyone but Edward settled on the floor around the coffee table, plates balanced on their laps. Edward sat up on the couch to eat and then under the stern gaze of his father resumed his prone position to join in the fun.

They played Candyland and Chutes and Ladders, and Edward sat out of Hungry Hungry Hippos because he couldn't reach the table well enough (they had to play tournament style to declare a winner, since there were only four positions). They had fun with Guess Who, then Clue, and they ended with Trivial Pursuit. It ended up being a late night full of laughter and Edward basked in the closeness of his family.

The party broke up after midnight when everyone started to head for bed. Jasper helped Esme clean up a bit and planned breakfast strategy briefly with Emmett and Carlisle before assisting Edward up the stairs. Edward was leaning heavily on Jasper by the time they reached the top of the stairs, biting his lip to contain a small whimper when he stepped wrongly and jarred his back.

"Edward?"

"I'm okay," he answered in a small, tight voice.

"Liar," Jasper said, but Edward could hear the smile in his voice. "I'll get you some more ice."

Edward nodded as they made their way slowly down the hall. Jasper kissed him gently when he settled on the bed and said he'd be right back. Edward slowly maneuvered himself around so he could lay flat on his back with a quiet sigh.

Jasper returned a few minutes later with another ice pack, a bottle of water and a small white bottle. "Alleve," he said, pouring two tablets into Edward's hand. "Your dad said it was okay, and would help with the inflammation," Jasper explained.

He took the pills and turned onto his stomach wincing as the cold pack touched his back. Jasper kissed him between his shoulder blades before climbing easily over Edward and joining him in the bed. "Thanks for today," Edward said quietly as Jasper got settled.

"My pleasure," Jasper answered, dropping his arm over Edward's shoulder and hugging him close.

"It really was, huh?" Edward asked, somewhat ineloquently.

Jasper laughed quietly. "I like to spend any time I can with you, Edward. Even, or maybe especially, just cuddling on the couch. Though I have to admit, it was kind of nice having you mostly captive today," he teased.

Edward chuckled. "Yeah, well, don't think it's going to last, buddy."

"I certainly hope not," Jasper whispered and pressed his lips to Edward's. It was a tender kiss, yet full of passion. Edward knew that Jasper was keeping their current limitations in mind, but that didn't stop Edward from cupping Jasper's cheek in his palm before sliding his fingers into the hair at the nape of Jasper's neck and shifting slightly, so there was more of their bodies in contact.

Jasper's hand mimicked Edward's and found its way into Edward's hair as Edward's tongue running over Jasper's lips, seeking entrance. As the kiss deepened, Edward's tongue caressing Jasper's, he felt his arousal grow, and he broke the kiss before they could push things too far and they both wound up extremely uncomfortable or Edward ended up hurting himself further. Jasper smiled at him softly and kissed Edward again lightly.

Edward sighed and relaxed against Jasper, their legs tangling together as he resettled. "What time is breakfast?" Edward asked.

"Esme said nine, so she could get started by eleven, and the girls wanted to watch the first part of the parade," Jasper answered, his long fingers trailing across Edward's shoulder again.

"Mmkay," Edward answered.

Jasper laughed quietly. "Goodnight, Edward," he whispered, kissing his temple.

"'Night, Jas," Edward responded, snuggling up closer and letting sleep take him away.

* * *

See? I promised it wouldn't be all bad... ^_^

Chapter 21 should post on Thursday.


	22. Chapter 21: Thanksgiving and BlackFriday

I'm so ready for Thanksgiving, I can't even tell you. Mostly, I think, I'm ready for the weather, cause I'm sick of 100F temps during the day and I'm ready to bust out knee socks and scarves.

Right. Anyway - chapter 21 is here. Naelany gets credit for helping me work through things, and drtammy1511 got me sorted with medical stuffs. Thanks, ladies.

Oh, yes. I got a little teary at points while writing this chapter (in a good way - no heartfail, I promise!), so there's my warning. 'Course, I'm also am emo wreck a lot of the time.

* * *

**21. Thanksgiving and Black Friday**

Jasper woke to a light tapping on the door. "Yeah?" he called quietly, hoping to not wake Edward.

Emmett popped his head around the door. "Ready?"

Jasper scrubbed his hands over his face. "Just woke up. I'll be down in a minute."

Emmett nodded and closed the door.

It was just after eight in the morning, and the guys were making breakfast before the girls got stuck in the kitchen. They'd asked Esme to pick up all the ingredients for breakfast burritos (Emmett's idea) when she'd done her shopping spree the day before. Jasper sat up and stretched, looking down at Edward still slightly curled up against him.

"Edward?" Jasper nudged him.

"Hm?" One eye peeked open at him.

"Hey." Jasper smiled. "I've got to go help with breakfast. Do you need anything?"

"No. I'll be down in a bit to help. I can chop fruit or something," he suggested. The eye closed again.

"I'll make sure to keep something for you to do," Jasper promised.

"Mm," Edward agreed.

Jasper shook his head fondly, kissed Edward lightly and easily extricated himself from his boyfriend's grip to climb out of bed. He quickly washed his face and ran his fingers through his hair after brushing his teeth. In socks, sweats, and a t-shirt, he made his way downstairs where Carlisle and Emmett already had coffee going and were sorting through the fridge contents looking for all their ingredients.

"Morning," Jasper greeted them, going for the cupboard and a mug for coffee.

"Good morning, Jasper." Carlisle always seemed pleasant so soon after waking as compared to some others. "Sleep well?"

Emmett snorted. "I'd hope so, the way Edward was tangled up all over him."

Jasper just rolled his eyes. Responding would just encourage Emmett to be worse. "Fine, thanks," he answered Carlisle. "Edward will be down in a bit. He'd like to help, if there's something he can do?"

Carlisle nodded. "We'll find something. Alright, Emmett, find everything?"

"I think so," Emmett declared.

Jasper looked over everything spread out on the counter. He really hoped they knew what they were doing, because he didn't want to face the wrath of Esme and the girls if something went wrong and they had to wait to get into the kitchen. Eggs, cheese, tortillas, potatoes, a can of mild green chiles, an onion, jarred salsa, bulk sausage, bacon, and a pile of fresh fruit were lined up on the counter.

"Okay," Jasper started. "How are we doing this?"

"Usually we set up kind of buffet style," Emmett said. "We'll get everything cooked and everyone fixes their own burritos to taste."

Jasper nodded. "Alright. What do you want me to do?"

Emmett pointed him toward the cutting board and knife on the counter. "Get to chopping. Dice the onions and potatoes, please."

"Yes, sir," Jasper replied sarcastically. He watched as Carlisle flicked on the oven, probably to roast the potatoes. Jasper grabbed the softball sized onion first and made fairly quick work of getting it diced. The new potatoes he scrubbed clean then diced.

Carlisle stood over the range, working on the bacon and sausage, and Emmett was breaking the eggs into a large bowl.

Emmett handed him a glass bowl. "Pop the potatoes in the microwave for a few minutes. They'll roast up faster if we give them a head start," he explained.

Jasper did as told and sat back for a moment to watch them work. The father/son duo may have nearly blown up the house when they attempted to barbecue a few months earlier, but they certainly weren't strangers to the kitchen.

"Good morning," Edward greeted from the door, leaning heavily on his cane, but the normal stress lines around his eyes seemed less pronounced.

"Morning son," Carlisle called from the stove. "Coffee?"

"I'll get it," Edward said. "What can I help with?" He moved toward the counter and fixed his coffee before drifting in Jasper's direction.

"Why don't you and Jasper work on the fruit salad," Carlisle suggested. "Emmett and I are alright here."

Emmett had broken two dozen eggs into his bowl, added a splash of milk and whipped them up, and had moved on to grating a block of cheddar cheese.

"Sure, dad," Edward agreed. Jasper started gathering the fruit piled on the counter and carried it to the table in the kitchen, while Edward dropped off his coffee cup and returned for a cutting board and two knives. Jasper returned to the table with a bowl, a strainer, and a paper bag that he sat on the floor between them for trash.

Edward started plucking grapes off the stems and dropping them into the strainer as Jasper reached for a cantaloupe and sliced it in half, getting up to retrieve a spoon and his coffee. They worked in an easy quiet, listening to Carlisle and Emmett banter with each other as they jostled each other around the range as they cooked. Jasper and Edward shot looks at each other as they worked, their calves pressed together under the table.

They had everything ready by 8:45 and everyone fixed their plates and took everything into the living room to watch the big Macy's Thanksgiving Day Parade. Jasper settled on the floor at Edward's feet while he sat in one of the oversized arm chairs. He leaned back against Edward's calves and let Edward's warmth seep through this t-shirt.

They watched the parade as they ate. Bella commented on how she'd like to get to see a couple of the Broadway shows that were featured, and Jasper made a mental note to find out when her birthday was. The parade was winding down when Jasper rose, kissed Edward softly and collected the dirty dishes. He volunteered to clean up since Carlisle and Emmett had done most of the cooking.

Just as he finished loading the dishwasher, Esme bustled him off to the other room so she and the others could get started on the big meal.

Jasper rejoined the others in the living room. He and Edward settled on the couch, Edward stretched out more or less flat on his back. Carlisle had settled down in one of the armchairs with a couple of journals to read while Emmett found a football game to watch. "I'm going to go get my computer," Jasper said quietly to Edward. He could get some work done while they watched the game. "Do you need anything from upstairs?"

"No, I'm okay," Edward said with a smile.

Jasper went upstairs and retrieved his laptop from where he'd stashed it against the wall. Even though Edward had said he didn't need anything, Jasper grabbed the book from the bureau near the bed, just in case.

He rejoined Edward on the couch, coaxing him to sit up a bit so Jasper could slip under him, Edward's head resting against his thigh. They adjusted positions slightly when Jasper opened his laptop, but it was comfortable despite the slight awkwardness as Jasper began to set up his lesson plans and review materials while keeping one ear on the game and half an eye on Edward.

Jasper typed away for an hour and half, the house slowly beginning to fill with the scents that Jasper identified with the holidays. Sage, apples, cinnamon and vanilla wafted from the kitchen and it brought a smile to Jasper's face, despite the inherent sadness he always felt around that time of year. The holidays were always hard without his family. They'd been so close, and the years following his dad and Amber's deaths had been hard, but he'd still had his mama. After she'd passed and he didn't even have the comradeship of the Corps anymore, Jasper had tried his hardest to pretend the holidays didn't exist.

"Jasper?"

"Hm?" He blinked. Edward was looking at him, a concerned expression on his face.

"Are you alright? I've been trying to get your attention for a few minutes," Edward said quietly.

"Oh. Yeah, sorry." Jasper offered him a small smile, aware of the looks he was getting from Carlisle and Emmett as well.

"Would you like to come outside with me?" Edward asked.

"Sure," Jasper answered, closing the lid on his laptop and setting it on the coffee table in front of the couch. He let Edward sit up and stand first, then took Edward's offered hand, and they ducked through the kitchen to the patio.

"You sure you're alright?" Edward asked, fishing his cigarettes from his pocket. He was smoking less often, Jasper realized. Maybe he really was trying to quit.

"Yeah, I was just thinking." He joined Edward on the lounger.

"What about?" Edward leaned into Jasper's side and Jasper draped an arm around Edward's shoulder.

"My family," Jasper answered quietly. "This time of year can be…difficult," he admitted softly.

"I can't even imagine," Edward said. "Do you want to talk about it?"

"I don't know," Jasper said with a shake of his head. It was supposed to be a day for being thankful for what he had, not to bring himself and his lover down by thinking about the past. He combed his fingers through his hair with a quiet sigh. "I miss them."

"Tell me about them?" Edward prompted softly, putting out his cigarette and reclining into the lounge, tugging Jasper back to rest against his chest.

"My dad worked for an energy company, mostly drilling oil wells. He was gone a lot when I was younger, but as he got seniority, he was able to schedule better time off, even if he still had to work away from home a lot. Mama worked at the hospital part time as a nurse once Amber I and were old enough to fend for ourselves after school," Jasper recollected softly.

"Amber?" Edward asked curiously.

Jasper's eyes closed. "My baby sister," he explained. "She was four years younger than me, and when she started school, mama went back to work and I looked after her."He took a deep breath. "We were close; it was just the four of us. My parents were estranged from their folks and they had passed away when I was young, and both were only children. Even with dad working a lot or being on the road, I never felt like I was growing up without a father, or was deprived of anything because my parents were both working. There were a few holidays where dad was working or on call so we had to put it off for the next day or his days off, but we didn't mind. It was just the way things were."

Edward's hands were warm against Jasper's skin where they'd crept under his tops, making slow comforting circles on his belly. He'd already told Edward how he'd lost his family slowly over the years.

"The first holidays after we lost dad and Amber were rough," Jasper said. "It had only been a few months and we were both still grieving, though it was getting easier. Mama wasn't really in a place to do a big meal, and it would have felt wrong, anyway. We ended up down at the church, helping serve the homeless community. We did it the next year, and I know mama was looking forward to it becoming a tradition, but that was the last Thanksgiving before I left for boot camp."

Jasper sighed softly and rested his head on Edward's shoulder, and felt the other man's lips against his temple. "I wasn't able to get leave the next year, but I sent mama my love and as sad as she'd been when I left, I know she was boasting about me down at the shelter," he said with a sad, small smile on his face.

"She was in the hospital the last Thanksgiving we had together," Jasper whispered. "It was early in her treatments and the doctors were hopeful, and they had admitted her, rather than sending her to a care facility, since it made it easier for her to get to treatments." He laughed wryly. "We had shitty hospital food, but one of the nurses brought us pie. I swear it was nearly the best apple pie I'd ever had," he said quietly, feeling Edward's chuckle rumble against his back. "She was gone a few months later," he whispered.

"Baby, I'm sorry," Edward whispered sincerely.

Jasper shook his head slowly. "It's okay," he said softly. He shifted slightly so he could look Edward in the face. "This is the first Thanksgiving in years that I haven't just hid out somewhere and pretended it was just another Thursday."

Edward cupped his cheek and kissed him tenderly. "I'm glad you came to stay this week, and not just because you've been making sure I've followed doctor's orders," he said softly, his breath washing across Jasper's cheek. "I hated the thought of you being alone all week."

Jasper rested his forehead against Edward's temple, breathing in the scent of him. "I wasn't looking forward to it much myself," he admitted. "And it's going to be really fucking hard to go back to living in the dorms on Sunday night."

Edward nodded against him. "I know. But it's just a few more weeks until semester break."

Jasper lifted his head and looked at Edward.

"What?" Edward asked, a smile playing at his lips.

"You want me to stay over the break?" Jasper had planned on getting a motel room for the duration of the break, or perhaps travel. He didn't often stay on one campus for a whole year, so the winter holidays were his opportunity to travel before starting a new assignment, or to keep him out of the closed dorms on campus if he was expected back after the break.

"Did you have other plans?" Edward seemed suddenly worried.

"No, not yet," Jasper assured him quickly. "But six weeks seems like a long time to intrude on your parents' hospitality."

"They'll only be here half the time," Edward said. "After New Year's, they're off on vacation."

Jasper exhaled slowly. "You won't get sick of me? I'm worse around Christmas," he advised. The idea of six weeks with Edward was appealing, he couldn't deny that. But they'd moved so slowly, which Jasper appreciated, that he was worried that suddenly cohabitating for six weeks would blow something up between them, and he wasn't sure he could take it if things went bad between he and Edward. He wouldn't only be losing his boyfriend, but the fantastic family he'd learned to love as well.

"I couldn't get sick of you, Jasper. We can work though it," Edward promised.

Jasper nodded and kissed Edward softly. "Let me think about it?" he asked. "I want to Edward, believe me," he stated plainly before Edward could look too disappointed. "I'm just worried about us essentially living together for so long so soon."

Edward nodded. "I hadn't thought about that. Take your time. We've got a few weeks. Just know that Esme is going to expect you for Christmas Eve and Christmas Day at the very least."

Jasper smiled and nodded. "Thank you." He relaxed back against Edward and they sat quietly, watching the rain come down. Despite having had a decent nights' sleep, Jasper soon found himself dozing, lulled by the patter of rain on the patio cover and Edward's soft breathing and heartbeat at his back.

"Sh," he heard Edward quiet someone, and then a feminine giggle. He felt a light weight fall over him, and a heavier one settle near his waist and something warm pressed against his chest. He hummed happily and heard a mixture of laughter that warmed him further.

"Esme's putting out snacks." Jasper finally recognized Bella's voice. "She asked me to make sure you're okay since you've been out here for awhile and it's not all that warm."

"We're fine," Edward said and Jasper felt his fingers in his hair and turned toward the touch, his eyes blinking open. "We just needed to talk."

He'd been covered with a blanket and Bella had piled onto the lounge with them, sandwiching Jasper between Edward and herself. Edward and Bella were both cradling steaming mugs in their hands and Jasper smelled chocolate.

"He lives," Bella quipped.

Jasper pinched her side lightly and she giggled again. "She also sent me out with cocoa, but you don't get any, cause I drank yours," Bella taunted Jasper.

"That's alright," Jasper said with a gusty sigh, feeling Edward shake behind him with silent laughter. He sat up quickly and kissed Bella's cheek, snatching the mug from her hands. It was still half full.

"Hey!" Bella protested.

Jasper took a quick gulp and handed it back. "Thanks, darlin'."

Bella struggled off the lounge and muttered something that sounded like "I'll teach you to darlin' me," which made her look and sound like a cranky teenager as she stormed off toward the kitchen entrance.

Edward laughed behind Jasper, sitting up to kiss the back of his neck. "Ready to head back inside?"

"Yeah," Jasper said, turning at the waist. He kissed Edward again deeply, his hand curling around his neck gently.

"Hm," Edward said, his eyes opening slowly as he smiled. "Or we could stay out here."

Jasper laughed. "Come on. It's cold, you're probably due for more painkillers, and that chair can't be all that comfortable for you." He rose and held his hand out for Edward, helping him up and steady himself when Edward took it.

Esme passed him a mug with a wink as they passed through the kitchen. Bella stuck her tongue out at him as he passed and he just waved with his mug and a smug grin, causing everyone to laugh. He noticed several pies already out on the sideboard, and Bella looked to be assembling a couple more, since she was rolling out pastry dough. He shouldn't have been surprised that there were going to be nearly enough pies for everyone to have their own.

In the living room Emmett was still watching football and munching from a tray of veggies, dip, and cheese with crackers. Carlisle glanced up from his reading when they entered, smiling softly before turning back to his journal, pen in hand. Jasper settled back on the couch and Edward lay back down with him.

Alice and Rose came out of the kitchen a few minutes after Jasper and Edward had settled back down. "Emmett, we're about ready for a break from the kitchen. Can we find something besides football?" Rose asked. Edward shifted up to sit next to Jasper so Rose and Alice could join them.

"Game's almost over, babe," Emmett mumbled, not tearing his eyes from the screen.

Rose rolled her eyes, but she was grinning.

"Turkey has about another hour," Esme announced, "So dinner should be in about two." She and Bella joined them a few minutes later and when the game ended, Emmett turned the remote over to Rose, who flipped quickly through the channels and settled on the James Bond marathon one of the cable channels was hosting.

When the timer in the kitchen went off, the girls headed back into the kitchen. Half an hour later, Esme called out for them to set the table, so the TV went off and all four men moved to the dining room. They worked as a pretty effective team and had the table set just in time for Esme to come through with the first serving dish.

The turkey platter was set at the head of the table, presumably for Carlisle to carve. The rest of the dishes were scattered around the table. Many were familiar to Jasper, and he felt his eyes burn slightly at the sight of his mama's ambrosia salad amidst the other Cullen family favorites. Edward took and squeezed his hand lightly as they sat, Bella on Edward's right, Jasper on Edward's left, and Rose between Emmett and Alice on the other side of the table.

"While Carlisle carves," Esme began. "Who would like to begin giving thanks?"

"We go around and say what we're thankful for," Edward whispered for Jasper. "Then Carlisle says grace."

Jasper nodded.

"I'll start," Emmett volunteered. "I'm thankful for my suitemate, who has brought my little brother back to us," he said with a smile. "And for Rosie, for sticking with me for three years without doing me permanent bodily harm."

Jasper returned Emmett's smile, though feeling slightly embarrassed at his praise, and everyone laughed at his comment about Rosalie.

"I'm thankful for my supportive friends and family," Rosalie said next.

"I give thanks that my family is healthy or healing and is happy and finally whole," Carlisle said while carving.

Jasper cleared his throat quietly. "I'm thankful that I've found friends and a partner when I wasn't looking, and to have been adopted into this family," he said softly. Edward gave his hand another squeeze.

"I'm grateful that my friends and family continue to stick by me, and that I've found a partner who isn't scared off by my shortcomings." Edward's smile was soft and Jasper couldn't help but return it.

Bella went next. "I'm thankful for everyone at this table, for supporting me and welcoming me into the fold."

Esme beamed at everyone. "I give thanks for a full house of love and laughter."

Alice finished. "I'm thankful for Jasper, for bringing Edward back, for helping Bella, for helping to open my eyes, and for befriending Emmett, cause we all know that's not always easy," she said to soft laughter. "But seriously," she continued. "I'm grateful for all of you, and the love and support we all share."

Jasper felt his ears heat up a bit at the further recognition. Esme hugged Alice with one arm. "Carlisle?"

Carlisle set down the carving tools. "Bless, O Father, thy gifts to our use and us to thy service. We give thanks this day for the presence of friends, family, and lovers in good health, and we remember those no longer with us, or those unable to be present." Jasper swallowed harshly at the acknowledgement of missing family members. "We thank thee for thy continued grace in looking out for this family and may those blessings continue for another year. In Christ's name, Amen."

The rest of the table echoed the benediction, and for the first time in years, Jasper didn't feel like a complete fraud while partaking in the blessing. He may not believe completely any longer, and he may have lacked faith, but in that moment, it didn't feel wrong any longer to hope to find it again.

Plates and dishes began circulating and conversation picked up as everyone started serving themselves. It was as lively a family dinner as any that Jasper had shared in the Cullen home, and he simply basked in the warm feelings floating around the table, occasionally feeling Edward's hand on his thigh. Jasper ate too much, simply having to sample a bit of everything. Everyone seemed to be in a similar state by the end of the meal, and there appeared to be plenty of leftovers to hold them through the weekend without Esme having to cook.

Everyone helped carry the platters and bowls back to the kitchen. Once the table was cleared and wiped down, Carlisle presented them with the double-eighteen dominoes. They sat down to play and had a good time laughing and being together. After several hands, everyone else was ready for dessert and they trooped into the kitchen to serve themselves, leaving the game in play on the table for them to return to.

Jasper gave into the peer pressure and let Bella serve him a slice each of sweet potato and peach with pecans, despite still feeling stuffed to the gills. He figured he could eat slowly enough that he wouldn't explode, but still enjoy them.

They resumed the game and Alice started talking about her plans for everyone for Black Friday shopping in Seattle. "So, everyone needs to be ready to go at 4," she said. "We'll have to carpool, but we want to get to the mall early! We're already going to miss the i_really_/i good deals, but we can get there by 7 or 7:30, I think we'll still be okay."

"Alice, honey, I think I'm going to take a pass," Jasper started. Edward wouldn't be able to go, and Jasper would feel guilty if he went and left Edward behind.

Her bright space turned immediately into a pout. "Why?"

"Because getting up at 3:30 in the morning isn't bad enough?" Jasper teased, causing laughter to float around the table. He looked over at Edward when he felt his warm hand on his own.

"It's alright. I can go, so long as I take the breaks I need," Edward explained.

"You're sure?" Jasper's thumb traced over Edward's knuckles.

"I've been cooped up in this house for two days," Edward said dryly. "I'm willing to brave the masses to get out of here for a bit."

Jasper laughed quietly. "Alright, Alice. But Edward and I are going in one car so we can leave early if we need to."

"Deal," Alice declared with a triumphant grin. Everyone laughed and the game resumed.

When they finished the game everyone called it a night, since they all had to be up early to go shopping with Alice.

The alarm went off entirely too early in Jasper's opinion. He turned it off with a groan, not bothering to open his eyes.

"She'd better take pity on us and have coffee," Edward grumbled.

Jasper mumbled his agreement. "Better idea," he said, shifting to embrace Edward a bit more fully. "Let's just pretend we slept through the alarm and meet up with them later."

"Can't," Edward responded. "She'd never forgive us."

Jasper grumbled, but knew Edward was right. "Shower?"

"Mm-hm," Edward agreed, but made no attempt to move.

Jasper prodded him. "Edward. Shower."

"Yes, sir," Edward mocked. He sat up slowly after untangling himself from Jasper's embrace, wincing slightly.

"Are you alright?" Jasper asked, studying his face with concern.

"Hm." He watched Edward stretch and flex his legs a few times. "The shot the doctor gave me must be wearing off." He gave Jasper a soft smile. "I'll be okay."

Jasper kissed him softly. "Still up for shopping?"

"Yes," Edward answered firmly. "I've done more in worse shape," he advised Jasper gently.

Jasper nodded. "Okay." He knew he had to trust Edward's self-assessment; if he started questioning everything it would only help push Edward away for thinking Jasper couldn't trust him. "Go shower, then, so the pixie doesn't kill us for being late."

"Slave driver," Edward grumbled, but got to his feet and limped toward his en suite.

Jasper had showered the previous evening, so he dressed after making the bed. Wanting to be comfortable, he dressed in jeans, a t-shirt and a hoodie, planning to wear his trainers if they were going to be on their feet all day.

Edward emerged from the shower, his hair damp and messy, a towel wrapped around his waist. He dressed quickly, though he made a bit of a show of it while Jasper watched, unashamed of his staring. He went into the bathroom to wash his face and brush his teeth before collecting Edward.

When they got downstairs, Esme was awake and bustling around the kitchen, filling travel mugs with tea and coffee, a line of brown paper bags on the counter.

"Mom, why the hell are you up so early?" Edward asked, kissing her cheek.

"Language, dear," she reminded him with a smirk. "I'm just packing you all up some breakfast. I can go back to bed after you're all gone," she said, grinning.

"Thanks, Esme," Jasper said, giving her a hug.

"Now, see, Edward, that's the proper way to greet your mother," Esme teased.

Edward rolled his eyes. "I knew you liked him better than me."

Esme laughed and handed him a mug. "Fix your coffee, sweetheart. Alice will be down in a few minutes and she's rearing to go."

Jasper accepted the mug that Esme handed him. "Jasper, can I see you for a moment?" Carlisle asked from the doorway. He was dressed in pajamas under his robe. Jasper nodded and followed him to the office.

Carlisle handed Jasper a small vial. "The shot Dr. Card gave Edward may start to wear off if it hasn't already. These will help without getting him high."

Jasper nodded and tucked the vial into his pocket. "I'll make sure he's alright."

Carlisle smiled and clapped him on the shoulder. "I know you will, son."

When Jasper emerged from the office, Alice was waiting, playing cruise director. "Alright, Jasper and Edward are taking one car, so the rest of us should be able to fit in one. Carlisle said we could borrow the Mercedes, so Rose, Emmett, Bella and I will take that." Alice proceeded to give them directions on where to meet when they arrived at the mall in Seattle. They gathered the breakfast Esme had prepared and packed in the paper bags for them and piled into the cars to start the journey.

Jasper and Edward took Edward's Volvo; despite the tune-up Rose had given Jasper's 1990 Honda Accord, Edward's car was still running better and was more suitable for the long drive to Seattle for both of their comforts. Though Edward offered to let Jasper drive, he declined, feeling Edward's anticipation for getting out of the house and he always seemed so relaxed when he was behind the wheel.

The first part of the drive was quiet as they drank their coffee and simply enjoyed each other's presence, waiting to wake up just a bit more fully. They stopped briefly in Port Angeles to eat their packed breakfasts and use a restroom, since Edward didn't want to eat while driving. Once they had food in them (egg sandwiches and leftover fruit salad), conversation came more easily over the soft sounds of Edward's iPod.

Jasper was unsurprised to find the parking lot mostly full when they finally reached the mall in Seattle, despite being 7 in the morning. The shops had been open since 5 for the die-hard bargain shoppers. Jasper had a feeling if Alice had had her way, she'd have been one of those in line. However, since she hated shopping on her own, she'd had to wait for everyone else.

The advantage to taking Edward's car was that they were able to find a vacant handicapped parking space near the entrance where they were supposed to meet up with the others. Jasper took Edward's right hand as they walked up to the mall, not planning on letting go anytime soon. There would likely be so many people inside to keep them from being much of a spectacle, though Jasper understood the Seattle community to be fairly open minded.

"Are you sure you're ready for this?" Jasper asked Edward as they reached the Starbucks where they were supposed to congregate with the rest of the family.

Edward nodded. "Dealing with crowds isn't as bad as it used to be," he answered, giving Jasper's hand a squeeze. "Besides, like I said, it's just nice being out of the house. I promise I'll be good," he said, kissing Jasper before they stepped into the mall.

Jasper was immediately glad that he'd dressed in light clothes; the mall was quite warm, and if he'd been wearing more he'd have overheated. The others were waiting in the Starbucks.

"Okay, here's the plan," Alice started. "We'll meet up back here every hour to regroup or change shopping buddies. Everyone has their phones?" she asked.

"Ma'am, yes ma'am," Jasper answered with a saucy grin while the others all nodded.

"Alright. See you in an hour." Alice linked arms with Bella and they strode off in one direction. Emmett and Rose went in another.

"Where to?" Jasper asked Edward.

"I have no idea," Edward admitted. "I'm not really ready to do any gift shopping. You?"

Jasper shook his head. "I could use some clothes, but I have no idea what to do about gifts either."

"Okay. Well, let's wander and see what catches our eye, then," Edward said with a shrug.

"This mall is fucking huge," Jasper observed after they'd attempted to walk for about ten minutes. The place was packed with shoppers out for the early sales. Edward and Jasper were forced to walk fairly close together because of the crowds and for Edward to keep his feet.

"You expected less from an Alice-designed adventure?" Edward asked with a grin.

"I suppose not," Jasper answered.

"Let's start there," Edward said, tugging lightly on Jasper's hand toward American Eagle.

Jasper nodded and followed. The store was packed, and even though Jasper could easily find Edward again in a crowd, he held onto his hand so they wouldn't be separated. Edward picked out a few pairs of chinos and jeans and Jasper rifled through the shirts, finding a few striped shirts in colors he liked. He debated over the herringbone vest for a moment before adding it to the pile in his arm. Jasper waited outside the fitting room for Edward to try on his trousers; Jasper was confident the shirts would fit.

They paid for their purchases and headed back towards Starbucks, not having a lot of time until they were due for a check in with the rest of the group.

"Doing okay?" he asked Edward softly.

Edward nodded with a smile. "Just twinges. I'm alright."

They met up with the others and went off again. The pattern continued twice more before Edward decided he needed a break. Everyone left their bags with Edward and Jasper while they took a seat in the busy Starbucks. Jasper got them a couple of coffees and they sat and chatted. He noted that Edward was absently rubbing at his thigh while they sat, and focused a bit more closely on his face. The tense lines around his eyes were back.

"Are you hurting, Edward?" Jasper asked quietly.

Edward's response was hesitant, but he nodded.

Jasper retrieved the bottle of pills from his pocket and slid it over to Edward. "They won't get you high, and your father gave them to me this morning," he said with a pointed look.

Again, Edward hesitated only a heartbeat, but he slowly took the cap off and shook one pill into his hand. He popped it into his mouth and chased it with a gulp of coffee before handing it back to Jasper. "Thanks," he said quietly.

"Always, Edward," Jasper responded softly, slipping the pills back into his pocket. As the shop filled a bit more he slid his chair closer to Edward's so they could talk more easily until the others returned. He could tell when the painkiller kicked in because Edward visibly relaxed. Jasper ran his thumb across Edward's knuckles where their hands were intertwined under the table.

Alice and the other arrived a few minutes after 11 am. "Okay, so here's what Bella and I are thinking," she announced. "Emmett, Rose, and Jasper will take the bags to the car while the rest of us go snag a table for lunch at Red Robin, if that's alright with everyone?"

"Bottomless fries!" Emmett cheered.

"Sounds good," Jasper agreed and Edward nodded.

"We'll meet you there," Rose said, gathering up the bags.

Bella took Edward's arm after he rose and they trooped out after Alice. Emmett, Rose, and Jasper split up the piles of bags they'd already amassed and carried them out to the cars. The Mercedes was parked a few rows up and over from Edward's car, but they all stopped at the Volvo before moving on. They received the bird from a few cars that had followed them to their parked vehicles, expecting them to be leaving. Rose just gave them jaunty waves as they made their way back to the mall.

The crowds in the mall seemed to have thinned out some; Jasper wondered if everyone had had the same idea to grab a meal at the same time. He made his way through the mall with Emmett and Rosalie. When they arrived at the restaurant they bypassed the hostess' stand and easily found Edward, Bella, and Alice at a table for the six of them.

Lunch was casual, mostly due to the noise level in the restaurant that was packed to capacity. Jasper kept his arm draped over Edward's chair when he wasn't eating, and he felt Edward's on his thigh through most of the meal. They didn't linger long after they finished their food; Alice was ready to get back to shopping and their server seemed anxious to turn the table.

Jasper and Edward headed out hand in hand. After sitting for a couple of hours, Edward was ready to resume shopping, so they walked the mall once more. Neither of them bought much, and at one point, Bella stole Edward away, leaving Jasper with Alice, but they had a good time as she tried to persuade him to purchase a few more eclectic items for his wardrobe. He was able to fend her off, but only just. He did cave on a few things that were more his style, though, to keep her happy.

By four in the afternoon they were all pretty much dead on their feet. As they walked out of the mall to the cars, Bella suggested meeting up in Port Angeles for dinner on the way home, to which everyone agreed.

Jasper noticed that as they walked to the car, Edward was leaning on him a bit more heavily. Jasper wrapped his arm around Edward's waist. "Are you alright?" he asked quietly, brushing his lips across Edward's temple.

"'Bout ready for another painkiller," Edward admitted. "When we get to the car."

Jasper nodded, though he felt inordinately pleased at Edward's admission. He wasn't happy that Edward was in pain, of course, but that he was making an honest attempt to follow his doctor's orders. Part of him was also encouraged that Edward was being open with Jasper and asking for the help he needed instead of hiding and relying on himself. Jasper wondered if that had been part of Carlisle's plan in giving him Edward's pills instead of giving them to Edward directly.

"Do you want me to drive?" Jasper asked as they reached the Volvo.

Edward shook his head. "I'm alright for now. But thank you." He kissed Jasper softly before going around to the driver's side.

Jasper fished the pills from his pocket before sliding into the car. Edward took one with the bottle of water that was sitting in his console, and they set off towards Port Angeles.

Alice had called ahead and booked them a table at a quiet Italian restaurant that everyone liked (except Jasper, but only because he hadn't eaten there before, and he wasn't picky anyway). Edward pulled into a parking space next to the Mercedes after a mostly quiet journey. Jasper had found himself lost in thought again, drifting between memories of his family and his thoughts on everything that had happened over the previous three months leading up to the moment he found himself in.

Edward seemed to recognize Jasper's need for a bit of space, and rested his hand on Jasper's thigh, just enough to remind Jasper that he was there while he got lost in a haze of holidays past.

"Thank you," Jasper said, kissing Edward lightly before they left the car.

Edward smiled softly and nodded, and they joined the others inside. The food was fantastic, as Jasper had been promised, and the company was wonderful as always. They were all tired from the long day, which made them a bit punchy, but the laughter around the table perked them up. They sipped coffee over tiramisu for desert, and it never ceased to amaze Jasper how they could eat and be together so often and never seem to run out of stories to tell or things to talk about.

Alice insisted on paying for dinner, though everyone protested. She claimed they all only went because she asked them to, so the least she could so was pay for dinner.

Jasper offered to drive the rest of the way since Edward looked like he was ready to drop. It had been a long day and Edward had been on his feet for most of it. Jasper knew Edward had to be in a bit more pain than he was letting on, but also relieved that he was taking steps to alleviate it and get on track with what his doctor wanted him to do. Edward would start back to physical therapy after the holiday, and he hoped it worked toward giving Edward the results he wanted.

They were on the road for maybe fifteen minutes before Edward dozed off. Jasper took his hand and held it lightly the whole way back to the Cullens.


	23. Chapter 22: Boys will be Boys

Apparently I worried everyone with two teasers about Jasper being in the hospital. :)

Please see my longer note at the bottom.

Naelany once again did a great job of beta-ing, and drtammy1511 also helped out with this chapter.

* * *

Boys will be Boys

It was three weeks after Thanksgiving, and Edward was waiting outside the dining hall on Thursday night. He glanced at his watch again. Jasper was supposed to be waiting for him for dinner after Edward got out of rehearsal. Edward had been waiting for fifteen minutes and there was no sign of his lover. He'd checked with Alice and the others and they hadn't seen him. He was beginning to worry that something had happened. Though they hadn't seen any sign of James for awhile, that didn't mean he wasn't lurking around somewhere.

But then, things had gotten a bit crazy as the campus was preparing for finals. Students were overly excited and looking forward to their six-week winter holiday, and had started decorating their dorms in various fashions. It was possible that someone had decided to light candles or something that had required Jasper's attention back in the dorms. Or maybe he'd gotten distracted working on something in his office, but Bella said he hadn't been there when she'd left.

Edward fidgeted, shifting his weight briefly to his right leg, wincing, and shifting back to lean on his cane. His fingers twitched; he wanted a cigarette, but he'd been trying to quit and he shoved the craving away. It was just his anxiety fueling the craving and he could fight it.

"Oh, fuck, did you see him?" a voice said, approaching the dining hall.

"Yeah, man, that was awesome," another agreed.

Jared and Embry crossed Edward's path laughing. "Shit, man, when he went down I thought I was going to piss myself. Who thought cool-as-a-cucumber 'What-cock' could be so flustered."

Edward had a bad feeling, remembering what he'd overheard the boys speaking about when they'd taken Emmett out mini-golfing. He started off toward Spader at as brisk a pace he could manage, the ball of anxiety in his stomach tightening further. Since it was before quiet hours, Edward's card let him into Jasper's building. As he drew nearer to Jasper's room, he could see the door was open, blonde hair peeking over the threshold, surrounded by red.

A pool of red that was creeping out onto the linoleum.

"Fuck. Jasper!" Edward called, moving as quickly as he possibly could while pulling out his phone to call his dad. Looking down to keep his footing, he saw the slick glistening against the floor as he came to a stop. Jasper was out cold, a pool of blood around his head. He could see that Jasper was breathing through a paste that covered his upper body.

Edward sank to the floor careful so he wouldn't fall in whatever was surrounding Jasper's door and slid on his ass across the slick substance to Jasper's side. "Jasper?" he called softly, shaking his shoulder while he waited for his dad to pick up the phone. He slid his fingers to his lover's neck, feeling his pulse strong under Edward's fingers.

He tried to quell the panic, knowing that head wounds bled a lot. It looked like he'd hit his head on the metal strip under the door when he'd fallen.

"Yes, Edward?" Carlisle finally answered.

"Dad, it's Jasper," Edward said quietly, keeping his fingers against Jasper's pulse point. "He fell, or something. He's unconscious, bleeding from his head and his ankle looks swollen."

"Esme, call the paramedics and have them be at the school, Spader Hall," Edward heard his father ask. "I'm on my way, son. Is he breathing?"

"Yes, and his pulse is steady."

"What the fuck?" Emmett's voice boomed as he approached. Students who had returned from dinner poked their heads out of the rooms at the noise. "Shit," he swore more softly. "Back in your rooms, please," he asked a bit more lightly. "Keep Bella back," he advised someone quietly, and Edward looked up and back to see Alice, Rose and Bella approaching.

"Everyone's here, dad," Edward said into the phone as the others attempted to keep the students back. Emmett went through his door and came through the adjoining. Edward didn't take time to wonder how they'd all known to come to the dorm together, but he was glad they were there.

"What the hell?" Emmett muttered as he looked around, taking in the mess.

"I'll be there in a few, son," Carlisle said and disconnected. Edward shoved his phone back into his pocket while Emmett looked around.

"They came in through the window," Emmett pointed.

"I know just who it was," Edward said. "Alice?"

"Yeah?" She said quietly. "I knew something had happened, when neither of you came to dinner," she explained quickly. "I just knew we had to get here, and…"

"Okay, Alice," Edward said quietly. "But I need you do something for me, okay?" He waited for her nod. "I need you to track down Jared, Embry, and Paul. Paul lives in this building, I think," Edward said. "I overheard them when we were mini-golfing a few weeks ago, about getting back at Jasper for getting suspended. They were laughing about something in the dining hall tonight. Start there."

Alice nodded. "We'll find them. Bella?"

He felt Bella's warm hand against his neck and lips against his head before Alice dragged her off. He was glad she didn't stick around; there was a lot of blood and he wasn't sure he could deal with two passed out bodies.

"What's going on?" Stan, the faculty advisor from the floor above came down.

"Looks like a prank gone wrong," Emmett said. "Can you help us contain this mess?" He asked, waving toward the curious students peeking around their doors. "There's an ambulance on the way?"

Edward nodded.

"Sure," Stan answered, beginning to make his way down the hall.

Edward heard sirens in the distance and he sighed quietly, moving to run his fingers through Jasper's hair, not caring who was watching.

"Watch your step," he heard Emmett advise someone. "It looks like the floor's been greased."

Edward looked up to see two paramedics with a stretcher between them approaching Jasper's door.

"You know what, you may want to come this way," Emmett said, moving quicker than his size would suggest to go through the kitchenette to his door, waving them through.

"Edward?"

He shifted his gaze to the concerned face of his father. "Are you alright, son?"

Edward nodded. "Yeah, I'm okay." He glanced back down at Jasper. The paramedics were looking him over.

"Does anyone know what happened?" one of them asked.

Edward shrugged. "We think some students played a prank on him and it went wrong somehow. It looks like he hit his head. I've been here about ten minutes and his pulse and breathing are regular and strong."

"Thanks," the EMT said, doing his own check. They slipped a brace around his neck and shifted him onto the gurney.

"We'll follow them to the hospital," Carlisle said to Edward, helping his son to rise. "Emmett?"

"Call me," Emmett said to his father. "I'm going to get to cleaning this up and check in with the girls." He stepped over the mess and gave Edward a hug. "He's going to be fine, little brother. Just gonna have a hell of a headache."

Edward nodded. He knew that, too, but there was so much blood on the floor. Rose approached from the other end of the hall and hugged him also. "Let us know what's happening."

"I will," he said quietly, and let his father lead him to the car, and they sped off to the hospital.

Though Carlisle had privileges at the hospital and often filled in for other doctors, he didn't really have any authority in Jasper's case. He was, however, allowed to speak with the attending physician as Jasper's doctor, though Edward was forced to sit behind in the waiting room and twiddle his thumbs until he got news. His mother arrived shortly after Carlisle disappeared into the ER and sat with him, after he changed into the clean jeans she'd brought him from the house; his had been covered in whatever goo the boys had spread on the floor outside Jasper's room (and Jasper's blood, but he was trying not to think about that).

"What happened, sweetheart?" Esme asked softly, holding Edward's hand.

Edward sighed. "Remember those students Jasper caught cheating back before Thanksgiving?" At her nod, he continued. "I think they tried to pull a prank on him in retaliation for their suspensions. His windows were open, and I know he keeps them closed, and that looks like how they got into his room. They greased the floor in front of his door, I think, and it looked like they did something with flour and water, but I don't know what, exactly," he explained. "Hopefully Emmett took some pictures before he cleaned up. We'll need it for any disciplinary action," he said on a sigh.

"Don't worry about that right now," Esme consoled him quietly, patting his hand.

Edward nodded and sighed again, tipping his head back to rest against the back of the chair, eyes closing against the harsh florescent lights of the waiting area. He looked up when his mom squeezed his hand again, seeing Carlisle approach.

"He's awake," Carlisle said, taking the seat on the other side of Edward. "They're going to run him through some tests before they'll let you go back. He asked me to tell you not to worry, he's fine, and he's sorry he missed dinner."

Edward rolled his eyes and laughed dryly. That sounded just like him. "What tests?" He asked.

"CT, since he hit his head. They want to rule out a more severe injury, and they'll probably want to keep him over night, to make sure he's okay," Carlisle said. "Right now it looks like a mild concussion. He'll probably need a few stitches for the gash in the back of his head, and it looks like his ankle is sprained, but not broken."

Feeling a bit relieved, Edward nodded and let out a slow breath to keep from sighing again. "Thanks, dad."

"Anytime, son. I'm going to head back there. Are you alright here?"

Edward nodded again. "I'm okay. Going to call Emmett and the girls and let them know, and get a status update."

Carlisle rose and gave Edward's shoulder a squeeze before he took off back down the hall. Esme's phone rang just then.

"Hello?" She answered politely. "Slow down, please, Alice," She said with a fond smile and a shake of her head. "Okay. No, I'm at the hospital with Edward." There was a pause. "Can it wait until morning, do you think?" She asked, biting her lip in thought. "Okay. Let me make a couple of calls and I'll call you back." She smiled softly. "He's awake, and they're going to do some tests and probably keep him over night. He's okay too. Love you too. I'll tell them. Bye." She closed her phone.

"Alice and Bella found Jared, Embry, and Paul and have confined them to their rooms. They want to call an emergency meeting of the disciplinary committee tonight," she explained. "I need to call Robert and see if this can wait until morning, or if he wants to drag everyone out tonight."She started going through her contact list on her phone. "Alice says she and Bella hope you're both alright, and call them when you get a chance."

Edward smiled slightly as he pulled out his phone to call Em. "I'm glad they found them. I don't know if it's something that can wait, or not," he said with a shrug. He waited on his call, shamelessly wanting to eavesdrop on his mother's call to the Dean.

"Hello Dr. Harper, this is Esme Cullen," she introduced herself. "Fine, thank you, though it's been an exciting evening. It appears that a few of our students have pulled a rather serious prank on one of the faculty members, putting him in the hospital at least overnight." She paused while the Dean spoke. "Dr. Whitlock," she answered his question. "Oh, no, at least not too serious, Carlisle thinks. No, Edward found him unconscious in his room when he was late for dinner," Esme explained. She paused again. "Embry Call, Paul Young, and Jared Clearwater," she stated. "Yes, the same. They have been confined to their rooms, and Ms. Brandon and Dr. Swan have asked if a disciplinary committee could be convened tonight. I had thought perhaps…" she stopped talking as she was clearly interrupted. "Yes, of course. Thank you, Dr. Harper. I will pass the message on. No, please call if you need me this evening. Good bye." She closed her phone with a sigh.

"The Dean agrees the committee needs to meet tonight. Thankfully, he'll make all the calls to arrange the personnel."

Edward nodded. The sooner it was dealt with, the better. "I'd better call Emmett," he said, pressing send on his phone. "Hey, Em."

"Edward. Any news?" Emmett asked.

"He's awake, but they're running tests before they'll let me back. Dad said he seems okay, though."

"Awesome!" Emmett cheered.

Edward couldn't help but smile a little. "Yeah. So, the Dean's calling a disciplinary hearing for tonight. Did you take pictures before you cleaned up?"

"Sure did," Emmett promised. "I'll get them off the camera and onto a CD. The girls find the kids?"

"Yeah," Edward answered. "They've got them in lockdown."

"Cool. Okay, I'd better get back to this. I'll pass the message on to Rose and finish cleaning up. Call me if anything changes?" Emmett asked.

"Will do. Thanks Em."

"No worries, bro. Later." Emmett disconnected the call. "Emmett got pictures, and he's going to put them on CD," he told his mom.

"Good, though if the boys know what's good for them, they'll just admit what they've done," she said quietly. "I doubt they intended for anyone to get hurt, but that doesn't erase the fact they broke into a teacher's private space."

"I'm sure the committee will make sure they're adequately punished. I should let them know how I knew it was those three," he thought out loud. At his mother's look, he explained what he'd overheard at Funland and then again while he was waiting for Jasper at dinner. "I'd kind of forgotten about it," he admitted. "I meant to say something to Jasper, but…" he trailed off with a shrug.

"Well, I'd say your suspicions were well founded, sweetheart," Esme said. "When the Dean calls back, I'll let him know you can provide some information if they need it."

"Thanks," Edward said as his dad came back down the hall. "Can I see him now?"

Carlisle nodded. "They've just settled him in one of the curtain areas, and they'll be moving him up to a room as soon as the paperwork goes through." He pointed. "Down the hall, third on your right."

"Thanks, Dad," Edward said, rising slowly. He'd stiffened up since they'd arrived. He made his way steadily down the hall to the curtain his father had indicated. He stepped around it to see Jasper laying flat on his back, his ankle elevated and wrapped, draped with an ice bag as he stared up at the ceiling.

"Hey," Edward said quietly, approaching the bed. There weren't any chairs, so he perched on the edge of Jasper's bed where the railing was down. "How're you feeling?"

"Besides pretty fucking embarrassed?" Jasper asked with a tired smile. "I'll be okay."

Edward leaned over and kissed him softly. "Do you remember what happened?"

Jasper nodded, then winced. "Shit," he swore softly, closing his eyes. "Yeah," he said in a low voice. "Jared and Embry found me outside the dining hall and said they thought they'd seen James going into Spader," he explained. "The rest is a bit fuzzy, but I'm guessing they pranked me?"

"It looks that way," Edward answered, reaching for his hand. "Your windows were open when we got there."

Jasper sighed and slumped into the bed, eyes still closed. Edward shifted his hand from holding Jasper's lightly to combing through his hair gently, being careful to stick to the top of his head, not wanting to bump the stitches he knew where somewhere on the back of Jasper's skull. "Do you need anything?" he asked quietly.

Jasper peeked one eye open and Edward felt better at the cheeky half-smile he got. "Think you can sneak me in some real food?"

Edward laughed quietly. "I'll see what I can do. They're moving you up to a room soon."

"I know. They're making me stay overnight. SOP for head injuries, they said." Jasper made a face. "But it's not like I can go anywhere anyway," he grumbled.

"Why not?" Edward asked confused.

Jasper sighed. "I didn't just twist my ankle when I fell," he said. "I strained my back, apparently. I'm effectively off my feet for a couple days, because there's no fucking way I'm going to be able to keep myself upright."

The irony was not lost on Edward. "At least it's Thursday?" He offered, trying to be positive.

Jasper's smile seemed half-hearted but at least it was there.

"So, when they let you out tomorrow," Edward continued, still lightly stroking Jasper's hair. "You're going to let me pick you up after my PT and take you to the house." Edward's voice was soft, but he was hoping Jasper wouldn't fight him about it. "And you'll let me return the favor and make sure you do what you're supposed to do so you can be back up and moving for classes next week." He smiled. "You're going to give your finals and then we'll have six weeks off and maybe we'll find i_one_/i," he teased "where one or other of us isn't sick or injured and we can pick up where we left off before Thanksgiving."

The smile he got from Jasper seemed more genuine this time. "Still thinking about having sex with me, huh?"

"You know it, baby," Edward said lightly and kissed him tenderly. They'd been thwarted at nearly every turn. After Thanksgiving, when Edward had been cleared by Dr. Card to resume intimacies, Jasper (and nearly a quarter of the campus) had managed to get food poisoning from something in the dining hall. Edward then came down with another cold which he passed on to Bella and then Jasper. Between that and the end of semester activities and prep work, they hadn't been able to get any significant time together.

A nurse came in, interrupting the moment. "What room are you moving him to?" Edward asked the nurse as she unhooked various equipment.

"225," she said. "Visiting hours are over at 10 pm," she said with a wink.

"Just enough time then. I'll be back in a bit," he told Jasper, kissing him again quickly.

"I'll be here," Jasper said dryly.

Edward laughed softly as he left the curtained area, heading back out to the waiting room. Carlisle and Esme were still sitting together.

Before he could ask, Esme handed over her keys. "I'll get a ride home with your father, and to school in the morning," she said with a knowing smile. "I'll call in a sub for Jasper tomorrow."

Edward smiled and kissed her cheek. "Thanks, mom."

"Am I seeing you boys this weekend?" She asked as they walked out to the parking lot.

Edward nodded. "I'm going to get him after therapy tomorrow and we'll stay over, if that's alright? I think we might be more comfortable there."

"That's probably a good idea," Carlisle observed. "I took a look at his chart and they think he wrenched his back pretty good, so he'll be on bed rest until Sunday. It'll be easier for your mom to fuss over him if you're both under her roof."

Esme smacked Carlisle's shoulder but laughed. "I'd love to have you both," she said before shooting Carlisle a look. "Is there anything special I can make that would make him feel better?"

"Your homemade macaroni and cheese would probably go over pretty well," Edward offered with a shrug. "Oh, and no-bake cookies are his favorite. But I think he'd appreciate just about anything home cooked. I'm going to make a quick run back to campus for some clothes and then grab some real food." Edward briefly considered McDonald's, but thought better of it, deciding that the café would be a better bet for something comforting. "I'll be here until they kick me out tonight."

"Call us if you need anything, sweetheart," Esme said, kissing his cheek before taking Carlisle's hand and walking with him to the Mercedes, leaving Edward with her car.

Edward grumbled as he squashed himself into her tiny car, thinking he should have borrowed Carlisle's instead. He drove back to campus, parking behind Spader and going to Emmett's room. Thankfully, his brother was there actually working on grading lab reports and let him into Jasper's room so he could grab clothes.

"How is he?" Emmett asked, trailing Edward and leaning against the door frame.

"He'll be okay," Edward said, crossing to the bureau. "Sprained ankle, minor concussion, strained back. He'll be out of commission for a few days, but we're going to stay at mom and dad's after he gets out tomorrow so she can fuss."

"Good plan. Let him know I'm glad he's going to be alright, okay?" Emmett asked. "We'll see him at dinner on Saturday."

"Will do," Edward said, pulling a few pairs of pajamas from the drawer, followed by underwear and socks. "Heard anything about the disciplinary committee?" He asked, using the handle of his cane to pull the duffel bag from the top of the wardrobe. He tossed it onto the bed and started shoving things into it.

"Just that they'd started. Alice and Bella are standing by to let us know what's going on, but from the sounds of things, they're probably going to confess," Emmett said with a shrug, handing Edward a few of Jasper's items from their shared bathroom.

"Good," Edward answered, shoving them into the bag. He grabbed the books on the window sill near the bed, smirking as he saw the author. He stacked them in the bag and looked around for anything else Jasper might want. Edward saw his messenger bag on the table and peeked inside, finding Jasper's iPod and earbuds. He added them to the bag. "Thanks for cleaning up."

"No problem. It was the least I could do," Emmett answered. "Got everything?" he asked as Edward shouldered the bag.

"Yeah, I think. I'll see you Saturday."

"Sure, brother. Call if you need anything," Emmett said as they walked back through the shared area and out Emmett's door.

"I will." Edward clasped his brother on the shoulder and left, heading back out to the car. He drove to the diner and ordered a cheeseburger, fries and a chocolate milkshake (for himself), and tomato soup and peach pie for Jasper, and went back to the hospital with Maggie's warm wishes for Jasper.

Edward found his way to room 225 easily when he arrived back at the hospital. Jasper was laying flat in the bed once more, staring at the ceiling, his ankle propped and on ice. "I come bearing gifts," Edward announced quietly as he entered the room, noting the curtain pulled across the middle, assuming Jasper had a roommate.

"Thank Christ," Jasper muttered with a small smile. "Please tell me you brought some fucking pants."

Edward laughed softly as he crossed to Jasper's side. He couldn't blame Jasper for being a bit cranky; he'd had a pretty shitty afternoon, and they were probably waking him up every time he fell asleep because of the concussion. "Pajamas, toiletries and food," Edward said, setting the plastic bag with Styrofoam containers on the table next to Jasper's bed.

Jasper crooked a finger and Edward bent over to him with a smile. "You're fucking gorgeous," Jasper said softly and kissed him lightly in thanks.

"You're welcome," Edward answered with a cheeky smile. It felt good to be the caretaker, especially knowing how frustrated Jasper was going to be for the next couple of days. It would probably be good for him to get a taste of his own medicine. "Pants or food?"

"Pants," Jasper answered immediately.

Edward drew a pair of pants from the bag and shuffled to the end of the bed. It took some maneuvering, but he managed to get the flannel pajama pants up to Jasper's hip without causing too much pain in lifting his legs. Jasper was able to help when Edward got the waistband to his hips, lifting himself up enough to tug them up the rest of the way. Edward knew Jasper had to be grateful he wasn't catheterized; he was only there overnight, and he hoped the bed rest wouldn't include a bedpan.

When he had Jasper dressed, Jasper used the bed controls to prop himself into a semi-sitting position so he could eat. Edward took the chair next to the bed and shifted the swing-arm table over Jasper. He unpacked the containers, setting his own in his lap. "Maggie says she hopes you feel better soon," he said as Jasper opened the lid on his box and laughed quietly. She'd snuck in an extra piece of pie (lemon, Jasper's other apparent favorite).

"I'm beginning to think all the ladies in my life think I'm too skinny," he groused good naturedly, his drawl slightly more pronounced.

"I think you're perfect," Edward said quietly, leaning over to kiss Jasper again softly.

Jasper's smile wasn't forced as they settled back to eat. "So, did I miss anything else tonight?"

Edward shook his head. "They've called the disciplinary committee into meeting tonight, so I expect we'll hear something soon. Everything else was pretty much normal for a Thursday," he answered with a shrug. "Mom's going to get a sub for your classes tomorrow, but Dad thinks you'll be back up and around in time for Monday."

Jasper nodded around a mouthful of soup. "She's going to fuss at me, isn't she?"

Edward grinned. "Mm-hm."

Jasper sighed, but Edward saw the sparkle of mischief in his eyes, and knew that secretly, Jasper didn't mind. A nurse came in twice while they ate and visited, checking on Jasper and his roommate.

Edward was nearly finished eating when his phone vibrated in his pocket. The display read Alice. "Hello?"

"Hi, Edward. How's Jasper?" Alice asked.

"He'll be alright, once he gets over himself and stops being grumpy," he teased and Jasper just rolled his eyes. "Got some news for us?"

"Yup. They all confessed. Jared and Embry broke in through the windows and set up the prank. They've been expelled effective immediately. Paul didn't actually do anything other than help them plan, and he's been suspended and will be required to perform community service next term," Alice explained.

"That's good," Edward said, giving Jasper a look that said he'd explain in a minute. "At least it's what I'd hoped for."

"Yeah," Alice agreed. "Needless to say, the Dean was not impressed with their behavior. I really hope he doesn't make a big deal about of this on Sunday, for Jasper's sake. He's been so much in the spotlight with everything already with James."

"He probably won't," Edward said thoughtfully. "If nothing else, he'll want to keep other students from getting ideas."

"Good point," Alice answered. "Oh, Dean Harper asked me to remind you and Jasper to file incident reports as soon as you can."

"I will, and I'll let Jasper know." Edward hated the thought of paperwork, but he knew it was necessary for the school for both disciplinary and insurance purposes.

"Okay!" Alice said cheerfully. "I've got to go. Tell Jasper we're thinking about him and we'll see you Saturday."

"I will. Thanks, Alice," Edward said and hung up after saying their goodbyes. "Jared and Embry have been expelled," he relayed to Jasper. "Paul's got community service next term because he was only involved with the planning. And we have to complete incident reports."

"Yeah, I figured I'd have to do something," Jasper answered with a sigh. "I can't say I'm disappointed in the committee's decision, but it seems a bit extreme, you know? They're just being boys."

"You could have been seriously hurt, Jasper," Edward protested.

"But I wasn't," Jasper pointed out. "Okay, I'll be hobbling for awhile, but there's no permanent damage. Besides, you can't argue it wasn't my own stupid fault for thinking I was going after James by myself."

Edward had to give him that point. "But if they hadn't led you to believe James was lurking around your building…"

Jasper took Edward's hand and gave it a squeeze. "The boys are to blame, yes. But I ran off without thinking. I'm just not sure they deserved to have their futures irrevocably damaged because of a prank. However, I'm sure as hell not going to protest the decision the committee made."

Edward smiled softly. "You know, most people would be talking about suing the pants off them and their families."

Jasper shrugged. "I think they'll have learned their lesson. Besides, I'd bet their parents are going to punish them more than going to court ever could."

"You're probably right." Edward sighed.

Jasper smiled cheekily again. "I usually am."

The nurse came through again, making notes on Jasper's chart as she checked his monitors. "Are you in pain, Dr. Whitlock?"

"It's alright to call me Jasper, darlin," Jasper responded with a grin. "And no. I'm still good."

"Alright," she said with a nod, re-hanging his chart and moving to the other side of the curtain.

"What are they giving you?" Edward asked, swiping his last two fries through the remaining ketchup in his box.

"Just ibuprofen," Jasper answered, closing the lid on his box. "The doctor said they'd give me a muscle relaxant if I start having spasms, but not until they've cleared the head injury."

Edward nodded, gathering their trash and limping across to the trash can in the corner of the room.

"You've moving better," Jasper observed, laying his bed back down flat. "How're you feeling?"

Edward settled back into the chair, moving it a bit closer to Jasper's side now they were finished eating. "Pretty good," he answered. Jasper had been helping him keep up with his pain journal, which meant they talked pretty frequently about how Edward was doing, physically and mentally with the new requirements Dr. Card had placed on him. "I'll see Dr. Card again after finals."

"Think he'll be happy with the improvement?" Jasper turned his head slowly to look at him.

Edward shrugged. "I hope so. We'll see."

Jasper gave him a small smile and Edward could see tiredness begin to creep into his features. He took Jasper's hand. "We still need to go Christmas shopping," he said, striking up a new conversation to try to keep Jasper awake awhile longer.

"Mm," Jasper agreed. "I have no idea what I'm going to get everyone."

Edward was lightly stroking his fingers over Jasper's hand. His lover's eyes had grown heavy, and Edward was attempting to keep him awake by talking, though he knew there wasn't much time before he was chased off by the nurses. "Me either. Maybe we can brainstorm tomorrow?"

"Mm," Jasper answered. "That sounds like a plan."

"Okay," Edward said, smiling softly.

The nurse popped her head in the door. "Time's up, gentlemen," she said with a smile.

Edward nodded and she ducked back out. "Is there anything you want me to pack up for the weekend?" he asked quietly before the nurse stepped back out.

"Mm…" Jasper appeared to think for a moment. "I can't think of anything. My finals are written and most of the prep work for next week is already done."

"Okay." He rose and kissed Jasper again softly. "I'll see you tomorrow."

"Alright," Jasper said softly. He returned the kiss, giving Edward's hand a squeeze.

"Call me if you need anything," Edward whispered. He double checked to make sure he'd set the books and Jasper's phone where he could reach them. "Even if it's three in the morning."

Jasper smiled slightly. "I will."

"Night, Jas." Edward kissed him again and hobbled out after Jasper's quiet goodbye. He drove himself back to campus in silence. He found himself reluctant to leave the hospital, though he knew he had to. Jasper was going to be fine, but Edward would gladly have stayed by his side to help keep him awake. The nurses would probably let him sleep for a couple hours at a time after midnight, and though Edward had a light load on Friday, he knew he needed to get some rest himself, or his PT was going to be miserable.

So far, his therapist was pleased with the progress Edward was making, and he had to admit, even after only three weeks he was beginning to feel progress more than see it. Though he still stiffened up if he sat too long or got sore if he was on his feet too long, he noticed that he was more evenly in pain from distributing his weight more effectively. Therapy itself was still a bitch, but it seemed that he actually found a therapist in Jane who actually seemed to mesh with his personality and pushed his buttons in the right way. It made going to the sessions bearable (he wouldn't go so far as to say enjoyable), which made it easier to keep going and make real progress.

Jane hadn't made him any promises, but she'd seemed understanding when Edward had outlined his goals at the first meeting they'd had after Thanksgiving. He hadn't flat out said that he wanted to be able to ditch the cane; he wasn't sure that was a realistic goal, but Jane had seemed to realize what he i_wasn't_/i saying, and push him toward it.

Edward pulled his coat tighter around him as he made his way back to his building after parking in the faculty lot. The temperature had dropped again and he half wondered if they'd be getting snow any time soon.

Once in his toasty dorm room, Edward changed and settled on his bed to get a bit of work done before turning the lights out around midnight. His sleep was slightly restless, images of Jasper unconscious and bleeding having him tossing and turning. He finally gave up trying to sleep around five in the morning, not long before he'd have to get up anyway, but significantly less rested than he wanted to be. After checking his phone to make sure he hadn't missed any messages from Jasper, he sent Emmett a text letting him know he wasn't meeting him at the gym.

The day passed fairly quickly. Edward made sure to use some of his free time to give his mother back her car keys and to fill out the incident report paperwork for the Dean's office. He packed up a small bag of clothes before he left for therapy and his parents' house.

Jane had her own office in a quiet part of town, which made a nice change from the therapy center at the clinic where he'd rehabbed before.

"Hello, Mr. Cullen," the receptionist greeted him. "Jane's running a few minutes late, but she'll be right with you."

"Thanks," Edward said. "I'm going to go ahead and change."

She smiled and waved him toward the small locker room Jane had set up adjacent to her large open studio. Edward had sweats and a t-shirt, along with a pair of trainers, stashed in the locker Jane had assigned him. He carefully folded his khakis and polo shirt, hanging his coat on one of the hooks inside the locker. By the time he'd changed and made his way back to the reception area, Jane was leaning against the counter talking with the receptionist, waiting for him.

"Hello, Edward. Ready?" Jane was wearing scrub pants and trainers with a long sleeved t-shirt.

"As I'll ever be," he said and followed her laughter back to the studio.

Jane led him through some stretches before they got started. "How was your evening, Edward?" She asked

"I've had better. I spent the evening down at the hospital with my boyfriend." They'd spoken about Jasper before, so Edward knew the news of him being with another man wouldn't surprise her.

"Is everything alright?" she asked, manipulating his body into another stretch.

"Some students tried to prank him and it went wrong," he explained, wincing as he moved. "He's pretty banged up, but will be okay." Edward focused on his breathing during the stretch. "I'm going to go ahead and apologize in advance if I get snappish. I didn't get much sleep last night."

She smiled at him. "No worries, Edward. I can take it," she said with a wink.

The rest of the session proceeded much as normal, though Edward felt like he swore a bit more than usual. He managed to keep his temper in check, however.

"Go change, and come back to my office, okay?" Jane said.

"Sure," Edward answered with a frown. He found the regular towel and bottle of water waiting in the locker room and he took a quick shower and wiped himself down before changing back into his street clothes, stashing the sweats back into the locker. He carried the water bottle back to Jane's small office, knocking lightly on the open door before stepping over the threshold and taking one of the seats opposite her desk.

"Thanks, Edward," Jane said as he sat. "Now, I just wanted to go over the schedule for the next several weeks. Is three days a week going to continue to work for you?"

Edward nodded. "School's out after next week, so my schedule will be mostly wide open. I'll be doing some work on my own time, but nothing I won't be able to rearrange."

"Good. I think that it's working for you so far. I'm putting my notes together for Dr. Card, and need to know when you're seeing him next."

"Three weeks," Edward answered. "After Christmas."

Jane made a note. "Well, I think he'll be pleased. You're making some definite progress already, Edward, and though I know you are aware that it's not an overnight thing, I hope the pace isn't frustrating you too much."

Edward shook his head. "No, I'm satisfied with the pace everything's moving at so far. I'm concerned about what might happen this spring when I'm on the road, though."

"When will that be?" Jane asked.

"Several weekends in February and March, and maybe over the Easter Holiday/Spring Break," Edward responded. "I'll be taking the band on tour."

Jane nodded. "We'll be able to work around it."

"Okay," Edward said with a nod.

She smiled at him. "That's it, Edward. Have a great weekend and take good care of your boy. I'll see you on Monday."

"Thanks, Jane." Edward offered her a small smile and made his way out. It was a short drive to the hospital and Edward took the elevator up to the second floor and retraced his steps from the previous evening to Jasper's room.

Jasper was pretty much where he'd left him the night before, only he'd been able to put on one of his own shirts instead of the hospital gown. "Hey, baby," Edward greeted him quietly, noting that the curtain dividing the room had been pulled back and the other side was empty. "Ready to get out of here?"

"Yes." Jasper looked tired and miserable. "I fucking hate hospitals," he grumbled. "How was therapy?" he asked in a slightly calmer voice as Edward crossed and settled on the edge of Jasper's bed.

"Same as always. Painful and frustrating but Jane's a saint," Edward said, bending over to kiss Jasper softly. "How are you?"

"My head hurts, my back hurts, my ankle hurts, I'm exhausted because those damn nurses won't let me sleep longer than 45 minutes at a time, and I'm really fucking bored."

"Oh-kay," Edward said softly. He wasn't used to Jasper being so open with how he felt. He studied Jasper's face carefully for a moment. "Did they give you muscle relaxers today?" Maybe drugs had caused a shift in his personality?

"No," Jasper said. "I'm just cranky," he said with a sigh. "Sorry."

Edward smiled and kissed him again gently. "You're allowed."

"Maybe, but I shouldn't take it out on you," Jasper said quietly.

"Hey, it's alright," Edward assured him, shifting to stroke through his hair softly, watching as Jasper visibly relaxed. "You told me how you feel, there's nothing wrong with that." He felt Jasper nod against his hand. "Are you free to go yet?"

"No, the paperwork isn't quite finished yet," Jasper said. "But the nurse said it shouldn't be long."

"Okay." Edward kissed him again lightly. "Do you want me to check?"

"Yes, please. I want to go home," Jasper answered softly.

"I'll be right back." Edward slid from the bed and walked out to find the nurses' station. "I'm wondering if Jasper Whitlock is cleared to leave yet?" he asked.

"Whitlock…Oh, Dr. Grump. Yes, it looks like everything has gone through. Let me get a wheelchair and we'll get him out of here," she said with a smile as she clicked through computer screens.

"Has he been a grump all day?" Edward asked with a small smile.

"Pretty much since I came on this morning," she answered. "But it's understandable. Head injuries aren't fun, and the rest of his injuries just made it worse. But you tell him not worry about it," she said, patting Edward's hand where it rested on the desk. "He didn't throw anything at me, at least," she said with a wink.

Edward chuckled softly and thanked her, going back to Jasper's room. "You're free. The nurse is bringing a wheel chair and then we can go." He found Jasper's loafers under his bed and slipped his left shoe onto his foot, tucking the other into the duffel bag. His right ankle had been wrapped but was still swollen. Edward hoped his father was home when they got there, because he wasn't sure he could get Jasper out of the car and into the house on his own.

"Thank Christ," Jasper muttered. "The food here sucks."

Edward laughed. "Bitch to me about the food when you've been here three months," he said lightly. He had been in a hospital in Seattle, but he had a feeling the food was similar.

Jasper grumped, but Edward could see his mouth twitch as he fought a smile.

"Alright, Dr. Grumpy, you're free to go," the nurse announced as she came in pushing a wheel chair. She handed Edward two bags. "Meds," she said as Edward peeked inside one and found Jasper's personal items. "Ibuprofen every four to six hours as needed, and there's a sample of valium if you start having muscle spasms," she explained to Jasper. "If you do, and they last longer than a day, come back."

"Yes, ma'am," Jasper answered.

"Where were you this morning?" She asked Edward. "Apparently you're a good influence. That's the first time he hasn't sworn at me all day," she teased.

Edward shrugged, though Jasper had the good grace to look slightly ashamed of himself.

"Sit up for me, Dr. Grump," the nurse instructed. She shifted to help him into a seated position and swing his legs over to the edge of the bed. "No weight on your right leg," she reminded him as he eased off the bed. He balanced on his left foot and settled into the wheelchair with a sigh.

Edward gathered the duffel bag he'd brought for Jasper and slung the strap across his body as he followed the nurse and Jasper from the room after making sure they had everything.

The nurse was reminding Jasper of his orders as they rode the elevator down to the first floor. "Bed rest tomorrow, then you have to start getting up and moving around. It may be difficult with your ankle, but do the best you can. Good Influence here," she said with a wave at Edward, "might have a spare cane you can use? Crutches won't help with your back."

Edward grinned at the nick name and nodded while Jasper actually laughed quietly. "I do have a spare," Edward answered. "Where the hell were you when I was stuck in the hospital for three months?" he asked her.

She winked at him. "Pediatrics in California," she explained. "I just moved here with my husband."

"Well, don't take this the wrong way darlin', but I hope I won't be seeing you again anytime soon," Jasper said.

"Now he's all politeness," she said with a roll of her eyes. "Yeah, well, I don't want to see you again for a long time either, Grump. Where are you parked?" She addressed Edward.

"Just outside." Edward led her to the Volvo.

"Thank you, Nancy," Jasper said after she helped him get shifted into the car. "Sorry for being an ass."

"Like I told your friend, at least you didn't throw anything at me," she said with a shrug and a smile. "Take care," she said, waving over her shoulder as she steered the wheelchair back into the hospital.

"Do you need to stop anywhere?" Edward asked quietly as he started the car.

Jasper shook his head. "No. I'd just like to go home and curl up with you, please."

Edward smiled and took his hand. "I think I can manage that."

* * *

Alright...I'm moving sometime in the next two weekends (my parents haven't gotten the room I'll be moving to cleaned out yet), and I have to get my house cleaned up and ready to rent to tenants before Oct. 1. I'm also a bit brain fried, having cranked out several chapters within the course of a week and a half, so I'm taking a short pause on writing to get things sorted.

**Don't Panic! **I have a stockpile of extra chapters, so posting will continue as planned, provided I can get to my computer/internet every Thursday morning between now and the 8th-ish of October. The next couple chapters are written, and weill be posted weekly, no matter how excited I am about ch. 23.

Also, check my profile for **Walks in the Garden **which will be out-takes, one-shots, and drabbles relating to this story. There's one chapter up already.


	24. Chapter 23: Shared Strengths

Thanks everyone for the good wishes about the move. I'm settled into my parents house for the most part, but work continues on getting out of the old one. Hopefully next week I'll be able to start writing again. ^_^

As always, thanks go to Naelany for catching my silly grammar errors, and drtammy1511 helped out with the medical aspects of the last couple chapters.

* * *

Shared Strengths

Esme was waiting on the step when Edward pulled into the driveway next to her car. Jasper watched as she darted down the steps and the walk to meet them. Jasper moved pretty slowly as he opened the door and released his seatbelt; his whole body ached, he assumed from making contact with the floor, and he was due for another dose of the horse pills the nurse had called ibuprofen.

"How are you, Jasper?" Esme greeted as he turned slowly in the passenger seat.

"I've been better," he said lightly. He felt bad, but took the arm that she offered to get out of the car. She was gentle as she helped him to stand, and he realized that she'd had a lot of practice with Edward and felt some of the guilt evaporate. Jasper awkwardly balanced on his left foot while trying to remain upright and it wasn't working.

"Just a moment sweetheart and we'll get you inside," Esme assured him, easily supporting his frame, though he towered over her.

"Here," Edward slipped his cane into Jasper's left hand. "Step with your left, lean on the cane as you step with your right. Let Esme support your weight," he guided gently. "And don't be self conscious, 'cause you're going to look like a moron, and trying too hard just makes it worse," he teased, kissing Jasper lightly before going around to the trunk for their bags.

Jasper followed Edward's instructions and shuffled toward the door with Esme's arm wrapped around his waist. His respect for Edward ratcheted up a few notches as he realized this was pretty much what he went through every day. He paused at the steps. He had no idea how he was going to make it up the three steps into the house, let alone the stairs up to Edward's bedroom.

Edward set their bags down and came to Jasper's left side, wrapping his right arm around his waist above Esme's. "Alright, love. Step up with your left," Edward guided quietly. "It's going to hurt, but you've got to do it, baby. We can't lift you, and it's too cold to sit around out here and wait for Emmett to get out of practice."

Jasper gritted his teeth and lifted his left leg high enough to step up. His back screamed at the motion but he completed the step, feeling Esme and Edward support most of his weight as they stepped up just a beat later. Edward wobbled slightly, off balance, but steadied himself quickly, whispering encouragement.

"Just two more, dear, and I've got a late lunch ready for you," Esme urged softly in his ear.

He repeated the motions twice more, his back burning with the exertion making him feel pathetic at the state of his traitorous body. Edward kissed him lightly when they paused at the open doorway and turned back to get the bags while Esme guided Jasper the rest of the way inside.

"Esme, you shouldn't have," Jasper breathed as he took in the living room. The furniture had all been shifted around to accommodate a bed that had been made up and settled against the back wall of the living room. It was a simple frame with mattress and box springs, but it was still a grand enough gesture to Jasper.

"It's no trouble, dear. You can't manage the stairs and I didn't think you'd be comfortable enough to kick Carlisle and I out of our bed," she said lightly as they shuffled across the room. She helped him settle onto the bed. "Does Edward have your medication?"

Jasper nodded as he slowly turned so he could lie down.

Esme smiled fondly. "Get comfortable. I'll be right back." She bustled off into the kitchen and Jasper couldn't quite smother the whimper of pain that escaped him when he laid back. He closed his eyes and focused on breathing for a few moments until he felt the bed dip next to him and fingers combed through his hair.

"How the hell do you do this every fucking day?" he whispered, embarrassed at how thick his voice was.

"I've had two and a half years to practice," Edward said quietly, and Jasper could hear the smile in his voice.

Jasper hissed as his injured ankle was lifted (albeit gently) and placed back down on something fluffy, Esme's soft apology reaching his ears as ice was draped over it.

Edward's fingers combed through his hair once more and then his arm slipped behind Jasper's shoulders. "Sit up a bit, love," he urged and Jasper complied, using his elbows and Edward's strength to pull himself up enough to take the pills Esme offered. She'd even put a bendy straw in the glass of water, making it easy for him.

"Thanks, Esme," he said with a tight smile as he lay back down.

"You're welcome, sweetheart. Are you hungry?" She asked.

"Not really, but I should have something with those pills," he said.

"Good answer," Edward said as Esme bent to kiss them both on the forehead and took off back toward the kitchen. "God, this brings back memories," he said softly as he arranged himself next to Jasper, turning onto his side and stretching out along Jasper's body, his head resting on Jasper's shoulder.

"Is this where you stayed, when you came home?" Jasper asked quietly. He turned his head slightly so he could nuzzle Edward's temple.

"Yeah, until I could manage to get up and down the stairs on my own," Edward answered, sliding his hand over Jasper's chest until it rested over his heart.

Jasper loved it when they were able to be together comfortably like that. Normally it was as they slept, and it had been a few weeks since they'd been able to indulge and he found he'd missed the contact. "Please tell me your mother didn't buy a bed just for me?"

Edward laughed softly. "No. They keep it in the basement as a spare. Alice's parents visit during Christmas, and when we're all here, there aren't enough bedrooms. Usually Bella and Alice camp out down there so the Brandons can have the guest room upstairs."

That sounded like something Bella would do. "Okay, that makes me feel better," he said, relaxing a bit as he began to feel the ibuprofen go to work.

Esme returned from the kitchen carrying a tray, which she sat at the foot of the bed, wandering off to retrieve something else. She returned a moment later with an oddly shaped pillow with arms, and a round, tube-shaped pillow.

Edward sat up, slipping his arm behind Jasper's shoulders again. "Sit up a bit," he urged and felt the pillows placed behind him when he did. When he sat back he felt himself supported and elevated.

"I knew I did good to hang on to all of this," Esme said, sounding satisfied with herself as she shifted the tray up to Jasper's lap. Two small bowls of macaroni and cheese, two no-bake cookie bars, and two glasses of milk were on the tray, along with the remote for the television.

Edward grinned at his mom and shifted to sit against the wall, shoulder to shoulder with Jasper. "Thanks, mom," Edward said, and Jasper echoed the sentiment.

"You're welcome boys. Call if you need anything else. I'll be around somewhere," she said with a smile.

"I suddenly feel about ten years old again and home on a sick day," Jasper muttered, reaching for one of the forks.

Edward chuckled. "It does feel that way," he said. He reached for the remote. "I can think of one thing that would complete the atmosphere. Cartoons?"

Jasper laughed quietly. "Sure."

Edward quickly found Cartoon Network's classic cartoons channel and they watched an episode of The Jetsons while they ate. Jasper hadn't thought he was hungry, but he managed to eat everything Esme put out for him. By the time he'd finished, the painkillers had fully set in and Jasper began to relax, feeling the exhaustion of the previous night's continually interrupted sleep weighing down on him.

He yawned behind his hand as Edward moved the tray to the floor and took the ice bag off his ankle. "Ready for a nap?" Edward asked.

Jasper nodded. Edward helped him sit up again and slipped the pillows from behind him so he could lay flat. "I'm going to change, and I'll be right back," Edward said, kissing him softly. He slid from the bed and picked up the tray, limping slowly to the kitchen before coming back to Jasper's side of the bed for his cane and disappearing down the hall.

Jasper was already halfway asleep when he felt the bed dip again and Edward press up against him. "Your parents won't be upset if we miss dinner?" he asked sleepily.

"You worry about the silliest things sometimes," Edward said with a laugh. "No. They won't mind." He adjusted his position and Jasper felt him kiss his chin. "Now, I didn't sleep much last night either, so shut up already," he said good naturedly.

Jasper laughed softly and turned toward Edward, his lips brushing against Edward's and he didn't need to be told again as he easily fell asleep.

When Jasper woke the house was dark and quiet and he desperately needed to take a piss. Edward was wrapped around him, his cheek pressed against Jasper's chest. "Edward?" Jasper nudged him gently.

Edward stirred, but just tightened his hold around Jasper. Jasper smiled briefly; as much as he liked it he had pressing matters to attend to.

"Edward, wake up, please," Jasper urged, nudging him again.

"Jas?" Edward blinked up at him sleepily.

"Sorry, but I need to get up," Jasper said.

"Mmkay," Edward muttered, hugging him before shifting away to curl up on his other side.

Jasper debated internally for a moment. There was no way he could make it down the hall on his own, but he hated to wake Edward. He hated more to call for Esme or Carlisle, however. Frustrated more with himself than anything, he reached out to shake Edward's shoulder as he called out for him again.

"What?" Edward asked grumpily.

"I need help," Jasper whispered, feeling bad for waking him and ashamed for having to admit it.

"Okay," Edward answered, swinging his feet over the side of the bed and sitting up.

Jasper turned his face away from Edward's back, seeing the glass of water with the straw sitting on the table at the edge of the bed, next to Jasper's drugs. He had no idea how long he'd been asleep, but figured it couldn't matter too much as he reached for the bottle and managed to get the top off (mentally thanking Esme for not putting the child-proof side on). He took two pills while he felt Edward slide off the bed.

"Okay, love, sit up," Edward guided him gently, slipping an arm behind Jasper's back.

Even with Edward's help it took a bit of effort for Jasper to sit up completely and he noted that his abs were beginning to hurt as they compensated for taking some of the strain off his back.

"I'm going to lean on you a little," Edward said softly, "and you just lean back on me and we'll balance each other," he explained, shifting to Jasper's right side. He handed Jasper his cane again. "We'll make it work," he said with a soft smile, kissing Jasper gently.

Jasper just nodded. He hated being an inconvenience, being a burden, especially on Edward who had enough physical problems already without having to support Jasper. He shouldn't have let Edward bring him to his parents' house; he should have just gone back to the dorms where he wouldn't have been a bother to anyone.

"Whatever you're thinking, stop," Edward scolded mildly. "I'm sorry I snapped when you woke me up. I was warm, and comfortable and having a very nice dream," he said with a smile.

Nodding again, Jasper let Edward pull him up and he found his balance a bit easier than before. Together they shuffled around the bed and down the hall to the guest bathroom.

"Do you need me to come in with you?" Edward asked.

"No," Jasper rasped. The bathroom had been fitted for Edward's use during his convalescence and there were enough hand holds that he'd be able to manage.

"I'll wait out here," Edward said, hugging him slightly with the arm around Jasper's waist until Jasper stepped away.

Jasper shuffled in and did his business, leaning heavily on the vanity as he washed his hands. Edward was waiting just on the other side of the door, wrapping his arm around Jasper's waist as he stepped over the threshold.

Edward walked him back and Jasper resettled on the bed. "Do you need anything while I'm up?" Edward asked gently, sitting on the edge of the bed once Jasper had laid flat once more.

"No," Jasper answered. He caught Edward's frown and immediately felt guilty.

"Talk to me, Jasper," Edward said. "What's bothering you?"

"It's nothing," Jasper said softly. He was being stilly, letting his frustration at himself leech out into his actions toward Edward. "I'm just tired and I hurt." He offered Edward a small smile. "Sorry for being a grump."

"You're sure?" Edward prodded. The frown was still in place.

Jasper nodded again. "Can we go back to sleep? We can talk more in the morning?"

Edward seemed to study his face carefully for a moment before nodding. "Alright," he said with a soft crooked smile. "I'll be right back," he said softly and rose, padding back down the hallway. He returned and climbed back into the bed, curling toward Jasper.

"Are you rethinking your idea that the boys' punishment was too harsh?" Edward said quietly into the dark.

Jasper snorted, finding a small smile. "Yeah, possibly. I know they didn't mean for me to get hurt, and if I hadn't been, then expulsion would have been extreme. But knowing that I'm going to spend another day staring at the ceiling and can look forward to a couple of months of working with Emmett on getting back into shape, I think I can say that they've gotten what they've deserved." He sighed. Jasper turned his head to look at Edward. "Sorry if I'm taking this all out on you. I'm frustrated with myself and angry with the boys that did this, and I'm kind of lacking in ways to vent that right now."

Edward nodded and rested his chin on Jasper's shoulder after he turned more onto his stomach. "Believe me, love, if anyone's going to understand, it's me," he said, his hand cupping Jasper's stubbled jaw.

"I know," Jasper responded. Further words were swallowed by another yawn.

"Go back to sleep," Edward counseled softly, kissing him gently on the chin. "We'll talk more in the morning."

Jasper nodded and his eyes fell closed. "You're so much stronger than I could ever be," Jasper muttered as he fell asleep. He felt strong arms embrace him as he surrendered to sleep.

Jasper found himself drifting in the haze between sleep and awake. He could hear voices but no distinct words. Without opening his eyes he felt for Edward, but found the other side of the bed cold and empty. He stretched and winced; his back was still tight and sore when he moved, but the throbbing in his ankle seemed to have faded to a dull ache. He hoped that meant it would be able to bear weight soon.

"Good morning."

Jasper opened his eyes to Esme's smiling face. "Mornin'," he answered.

"How are you feeling?" She asked, placing a new glass of water on the table.

"Too early to tell," he said lightly, finding a smile for her. "But better than yesterday, since I'm waking up here."

She laughed and patted his leg. "Can I get you anything?"

"I would love a cup of coffee, if it's not too much trouble," Jasper answered.

"I'm one step ahead of you," Edward said as he joined Jasper on the bed, cradling a mug.

Esme helped Jasper sit up and relax against the funky armed pillow again and Jasper took the cup from Edward gratefully after Esme tipped two of the ibuprofen into his palm. Edward settled in next to Jasper. "What do you want to do today?" Edward asked when Esme wandered back to the kitchen.

Jasper raised an eyebrow at him as he drank from the coffee cup.

Edward chuckled. "Okay, yeah, silly question."

Jasper grinned. "I'd like to take a shower. Beyond that, I think I'm going to have to have a quiet day of reading, tv or video games. What are your plans?"

"Apparently I'm going to help my gorgeous boyfriend take a shower and spend the day being a couch potato," Edward teased lightly.

"You don't have to hang out with me if you had other plans," Jasper said gently.

Edward shrugged. "Where else would I be? Besides, anything I needed to do today I can do here," he explained.

Jasper nodded and smiled his thanks.

"Are you boys ready for breakfast?" Esme called from the kitchen.

Jasper shook his head. "I think we'll shower first," Edward called back, causing Jasper to blush lightly. He was under no impression that Esme didn't believe them to not be intimate, but to have it announced that way was slightly embarrassing. Edward seemed to realize this when he heard the mixed laughter from the kitchen and his ears pinked as well.

"I brought down your toiletries already, and there are fresh linens in the bathroom," Esme said from the doorway to the kitchen, smiling brightly.

"Thanks, mom," Edward said dryly.

Esme giggled again and went back to the kitchen. "Sorry," Edward said quietly.

Jasper shrugged. "Like they didn't know," he said casually and watched Edward's ears pink a bit more. "Edward?" Jasper prompted.

Edward coughed lightly. "Dad was in the room when Dr. Card said no sex at Thanksgiving," he said quickly.

Jasper laughed. "Yup. They knew," he said, kissing Edward's temple. "It's alright. I like that we don't have to hide anything from your family."

"Me too," Edward agreed. "Ready for that shower?"

"Yes, please," Jasper said, shifting his empty coffee cup to the table next to the water and his pills.

"Let me get a few things ready first. Think you can get up on your own?" Edward asked.

Jasper nodded. "I'll try."

Edward smiled and patted his thigh before rising and grabbing their bags. He carried them down the hall while Jasper used his arms to push himself from the half reclined position into seated upright. It seemed slightly easier than it had even hours earlier when he'd needed Edward to help him up to piss. He figured that meant the inflammation was going down and the pills were working.

Jasper turned slowly to hang his legs over the edge of the bed. He flexed and extended and rolled his right ankle and was pleased to find it wasn't as tender as he'd expected. Glancing around for something to use as leverage to try to stand, he spotted what had to be Edward's backup cane leaning against the table. It looked like it was probably purchased from a medical supply company before Edward got his custom wooden cane that he currently used. It was metal with a square base, having four points of contact with the ground instead of one. Jasper reached for it with his left hand, remembering how Edward had coached him the previous evening.

"Go slowly, son," Carlisle advised from behind him. Jasper glanced over his shoulder and saw Carlisle poised to rush to assist, if needed.

Super conscious of each of his movements, Jasper slowly leaned forward, shifting his weight and center of balance into his thighs. He gripped the plastic grooved handle of the cane tightly in his left hand and used his right to push himself up off the mattress. Once he was on his feet he ever so slowly straightened, stopping when his back shrieked in pain, leaving him hunched about halfway over, but inordinately pleased with himself.

"How's your ankle?" Carlisle asked.

Jasper took a tentative step. It hurt, but it was better than it had been and he felt like he could probably manage on his own. "Okay," he said breathlessly. It was amazing how much focus could sap his energy. He was a healthy thirty year old man, for Christ's sake, and he worked out daily. He shouldn't have been so exhausted by simply standing.

Carlisle laughed softly, as if reading his thoughts, or maybe his body language. "Pain is draining, Jasper," he said. "You'll be back to yourself in a couple of days. Take it easy, though. Stay off your feet as much as possible today," he reminded him.

Jasper nodded as he took a couple more tentative steps, making his way around the bed.

"I knew you were too stubborn to stay down for long," Edward teased as Jasper reached the hallway. "Doing okay?"

Jasper nodded as he focused on the pattern of stepping with his left, then moving the cane with his right to keep most of his weight off his ankle. It took him several minutes to reach the bathroom, but he did it.

Edward started the water and helped him strip out of his clothes and unwrap his ankle while Jasper sat on the closed lid of the commode. Edward quickly stripped off as well and helped Jasper stand again. Thankfully, when the Cullens had remodeled the bathroom for Edward's use, they'd converted the tub to a shower stall, so Jasper didn't have to try to step over and into a tub enclosure. Together they shuffled into the shower and Jasper relaxed as he stepped under the hot spray, feeling his muscles unclench as Edward stepped up behind him.

Though the hot water relaxed his back enough so he could straighten out, he was still hunched over a bit. After a moment, he sat on the shower bench, sighing as the pain ebbed slightly. Despite the heat and still feeling twinges of pain, Jasper couldn't stop his body from reacting to Edward's. He felt himself beginning to grow hard as Edward gently massaged shampoo into his damp hair, taking care to avoid the tender area around the sutures in the back of his skull (the nurses had said he could get them wet after twenty four hours, which he'd exceeded), but getting the remains of a white pasty substance out of the roots with a soft scraping of his fingernails.

He moaned softly as Edward's fingers stroked down his neck after his hair had been scrubbed clean. Jasper felt Edward's lips against his shoulder and he leaned back into Edward a bit more. Edward's own arousal was making itself known against Jasper's back and he smiled, shifting again which earned him a quiet growl that rumbled across his back from Edward's chest.

"It seems like you've got a rather large problem, there," Edward teased, his soaped up hands running over Jasper's body. His touches remained largely gentle, but Jasper gasped when Edward raked his nails over his nipples, or across some of the more sensitive scar tissue on his chest or back.

"Do you think you could help me out with that?" Jasper asked. He was pretty sure the release would cause him a bit more physical pain later, but he really didn't want to have to wait for his erection to die on its own, and he sure as hell wasn't going to pass up a chance to have a little fun with Edward. It had been i_weeks_/i since they'd been together, even if it had just been hands, it had been too long.

"Oh, I think I can come up with something to solve it," Edward said lightly, his hands trailing down Jasper's body. He moaned low in his throat as Edward wrapped his suddsed up hand around his cock. "You have to tell me if you're hurting," Edward whispered low in his ear.

"Feels good," Jasper promised. His head tipped back slightly and one hand balanced on the wall of the stall, the other going to Edward's hip. Jasper's thumb made small circles against Edward's smooth skin as Edward worked his hands over Jasper's body, fondling his sack between long strokes over his cock. It didn't take long and Jasper came with a grunt, Edward's lips over his pulse point in Jasper's neck.

"Okay?" Edward asked quietly.

"Fuck yeah," Jasper said with a smile. "Fucking fantastic," he answered, wriggling back against Edward again as the shower washed him clean of soap and semen.

"Don't start something you can't finish, love," Edward warned him, biting off a moan.

"Who says I can't finish?" Jasper shot back.

"Just don't hurt yourself baby," Edward whispered, the words nearly swallowed by the water.

Jasper simply, but carefully, using the wall for balance, turned slowly on the stool to face Edward. He reached for the soap and lathered his hands. He looked at Edward playfully. "I'd get on my knees, but I'm not sure I'd get back up again," he teased. He used his seated position to run his tongue over Edward's belly button and treasure trail while his hands went to work soaping him up. Jasper took his time tracing the long lean planes of Edward's body, listening to Edward's responses over the water. He was thankful for large water heaters as he placed his lips over Edward's flank and nipped lightly at the flesh before sucking gently at first, and then enough to raise a mark as he stroked his rock-hard cock.

"Shit," Edward swore softly as Jasper soothed his mark with his tongue, feeling Edward's cock twitch in his hand.

"Liked that?" Jasper asked cheekily. He adjusted his stroke and was rewarded with a moan. A few strokes later Edward gasped out his name in warning and Jasper shifted enough to not get shot in the face when Edward came. He misjudged, though, and semen splattered across his cheek. He swiped it away with his fingers and turned back into the shower spray to wash it away after kissing Edward deeply as best he could from the awkward angle.

"Well, that wasn't what I was expecting when I told mom we were showering," Edward teased. "Not that I mind in the slightest."

Jasper smiled. He didn't either, but he was beginning to feel being more or less upright for so long. "Me either, on both counts, but I think we needed it," he said. "Do you still need to clean up?"

Edward nodded. "Let me help you out, first, though," he said. Jasper leaned into him a bit more than he'd had to before and let Edward walk him out and set him on the toilet again. "I'll be just a minute," he said, kissing Jasper deeply and handing him a towel.

Jasper scrubbed his hair dry and sure enough the shower shut off after just a moment and Edward stepped out, reaching for another towel to wrap around his waist. Edward helped Jasper dress in a clean pair of sweats and a long-sleeved tee-shirt before dressing himself in pajama bottoms and a hoodie over a t-shirt. "Dad's going to want to look at your ankle," Edward said, explaining why he'd not bothered with socks for Jasper.

Jasper nodded. "Okay." He let his legs fall open and he tugged Edward between his thighs by his hips and rested his forehead against his belly. He felt Edward comb through his hair lightly and they sat like that for a few minutes, no words exchanged, but affection openly trading between them.

Edward kissed the top of his head. "Alright, Esme's probably got breakfast ready, and then you're going to want to lie down for awhile."

The walk to the kitchen took a bit longer since Jasper was tired, but he managed under his own power. He felt infinitely better for the shower which helped lift his spirits even further, though he was feeling pretty positive after managing to navigate himself around the house, even if he felt eighty years old.

Esme loaded them up with eggs, bacon, and waffles which they both ate heartily, not having eaten since getting home early in the afternoon the night before. When they finished, they went back to the bed in the living room, finding it made up for daytime use as a lounge area with more pillows (including the funky one for Jasper).

After Carlisle took a look at Jasper's ankle he decided it didn't need to be wrapped anymore and Edward helped him put some heavy socks on. Jasper and Edward spent the day lounging and watching television, listening to Esme bustle around making plans for the evening dinner. She asked if they needed anything from the store when she went out to get the groceries for a hearty beef and vegetable stew and buttermilk biscuits.

Emmett and Rosalie arrived in the early afternoon, and Alice and Bella not long after. Bella brought Jasper the work his sub had collected in his classes Friday afternoon, and Alice gave him a pair of fuzzy house slippers she'd picked up while shopping. She slipped them on his feet with a giggle; floppy bear heads looked back at him.

"Thanks, Alice," he said wryly, but accepted her hug.

The bed wasn't really big enough, but the girls piled on with Edward and Jasper. Jasper had been sitting up against the wall cushioned by pillows since Esme had brought them lunch of leftover macaroni and cheese with ham chopped up in it, so Alice was able to settle near his feet and Bella smooshed herself between him and Edward with Rose at Edward's feet. Emmett dragged one of the chairs over to Edward's side and flopped into it, propping his feet up at the foot of the bed. Alice stole the remote and flipped through channels so fast Jasper doubted she could tell what was on each one before she settled on a movie that was just beginning.

"Well, isn't this a cozy scene," Esme observed as she returned from the store. Emmett jumped up to help bring in the groceries. "Thank you, sweetheart," she said as he passed her. "Dinner won't be for awhile, but I brought some snacks," she said as she passed through to the kitchen.

Emmett passed through with three more bags and returned a few minutes later with a bag of tortilla chips and a container of salsa. When Alice reached over to help herself, Emmett smacked her hand away. "Mine!"

Jasper laughed quietly as Alice glared at Emmett before hopping off the bed and stalking into the kitchen. She returned a few minutes later with a container of spinach dip and a box of crackers. He perched on Jasper's side of the bed, away from Emmett, so he couldn't reach without falling over everyone.

"Now play nice, kids," Esme called from the kitchen, making Jasper snicker.

Bella soon dozed off, her head coming to rest on Jasper's shoulder, and they just left her there, waiving off Emmett's offer to move her to the couch.

When the movie they were watching ended, Emmett insisted on playing video games, so they stretched the console and controllers across the room. They took turns playing, eventually drawing Carlisle from his office, where he'd been hiding since returning from his morning golf game. Esme also joined them while the soup was simmering and Emmett goaded her into playing with them.

"She's been practicing," Edward whispered to Jasper as Esme agreed, but only if she got to pick the game.

They watched as Esme thoroughly defeated Emmett, and Jasper laughed through Emmett's open mouthed stare while Esme did a victory dance through the living room.

Jasper joined everyone at the table for dinner, though everyone but Edward, Carlisle, and Esme told him he didn't have to. But each subsequent trip after the shower that morning got easier, so Jasper had no trouble getting to the dining room.

After everyone went home and Carlisle and Esme retired to their room, Jasper and Edward curled back up on their bed in the living room. Jasper was looking forward to getting back to campus, if only to stop inconveniencing Edward's parents, and because classes would be a welcome distraction. He was sure that he'd be exhausted by the end of the week, but Jasper knew he'd manage.

Edward had turned the TV to one of the music channels, and soft jazz filled the room. They were sat together, propped up against the wall, Edward's head resting against Jasper's shoulder, Jasper's left arm around Edward's shoulders.

"Jas?"

"Hm." Jasper turned toward Edward.

"You said something last night, well, early this morning," Edward started. "And I've been thinking about it all day, and just wanted to know what you meant."

"What did I say?" Jasper asked, frowning slightly. He ran through his memory of the early morning and was coming up blank for anything that could have been hurtful or misinterpreted.

"You said I was so much stronger than you could ever be," Edward said. "Did you mean it?"

"Yes," Jasper answered, reaching up to comb through Edward's hair lightly.

"Why would you say that?"

"Because it's true," Jasper said honestly. "At Thanksgiving I called you a pessimist, but I think you're a realist, Edward. Christ, I've only been hobbling around for a day after one day in the hospital and I'm ready to just collapse into bed and stay there until my back feels better, even though I know that's not what's best. When I needed your help to get out of bed to take a piss last night I was ready to just give up, even though somewhere in the back of my head I knew this is a temporary injury and that I'll heal in a few weeks. I can't even fathom how you managed, but I have so much more respect and understanding after the last couple of days. You did a i_year_/i of rehab, Edward, and you're still here, dealing with everything that life keeps throwing at you. Sure, you withdraw from people when you need space, but overall you seem to handle everything with such grace..."

Edward snorted. "Do you even i_remember_/i the week before Halloween?"

"Yes," Jasper said. "And even though you blew up at Bella, you knew you were wrong and you fixed it."

Edward shook his head. "I think you give me too much credit," he protested quietly.

Jasper slid his hand down Edward's neck and around to cup his cheek, making Edward look at him. "I don't think you give yourself enough," Jasper whispered before he kissed him. It wasn't a passionate kiss, but there was plenty of emotion behind it, from both sides.

"I don't know what I've done to deserve you, Edward, and fuck knows I'm not worthy of it, but I'll take whatever you give me," Jasper whispered, his eyes closed, forehead resting against Edward's after the kiss ended. "I know that I've lost," he continued softly, still cupping Edward's cheek. "But now I know that I don't have to keep letting those losses define me; I can move forward." He smiled, unknowing if Edward could see him, his eyes still closed. "You've helped me heal," he whispered, hearing his voice break on the last couple of words.

"I have no idea what you see in me," Edward confessed quietly. "But if you're going to put that much faith in me, the least I can do is to try not to let you down," he whispered. "I want to try to be the man that you think I am, Jasper."

"Just be Edward," Jasper said back.

He felt Edward shake his head, and pull away, before Edward hugged him close, and spoke low and quiet in Jasper's ear, his chest rumbling as he spoke sending vibrations through Jasper. "I know my family has spoken to you about how much I've changed since I met you," he started. "I think you've healed me just a much and I don't know what I would do if you weren't here." Jasper felt and heard the breath that Edward drew. "I love you, Jasper."

Jasper couldn't stop the smile that that threatened to split his face in two. He turned his face toward Edward's, feeling the other man's stubble scrape across his nose and lips as he sought to capture Edward's lips with his own.

The kiss they shared was deep and passionate, and though Jasper initiated it, he let Edward take over the lead, felt Edward's tongue in his mouth, Edward's hands cupping his cheeks and then lingering on his neck over his pulse point. Jasper tried to breathe through his nose, but he was quickly growing winded; he was forced to pull away to draw enough breath to whisper back at Edward. "I love you, too."

Edward kissed him again and tugged at Jasper's shoulder to pull him forward as Edward reclined back. Jasper tried to swallow the gasp of pain that escaped his back extended in a way he'd not attempted, but he was unable to contain it and reality came crashing back in on them.

"Shit, I'm sorry," Edward apologized quickly.

Jasper shook his head and smiled, reaching for Edward's hand and tugging him back to sit next to him again as he sighed softly when things snapped back into place. "You'll just have to make it up to me later, when we can get carried away," he teased lightly. "Besides," he whispered. "Your parents are right down the hall, and I'm not sure they need a visual to go along with their impressions."

Edward rolled his eyes, but nodded, a grin threatening to break out over his face. They got resettled and Edward flipped over to a movie. They fell asleep watching television, Edward draped half over Jasper, his face turned toward the screen, his long fingers splayed out over Jasper's chest, palm over his heart. Jasper's arm curled possessively over Edward's waist as he held him close in their sleep, neither of them stirring when Esme checked on them after midnight, smiling softly as she turned off the television.

* * *

So, are we happy campers? ~_^


	25. Chapter 24: Winter Break Prep

No big notes this time. Naelany and wishingforlove continue to be awesome betas, and my readers are fantastic for pushing reviews over 900 the last chapter. There'll probably be a massively loud squee! from Northern California if/when it breaks 1000. Just sayin'. ^_^

* * *

**Winter break prep**

Jasper and Edward returned to campus Sunday afternoon. They had enjoyed a quiet morning that had included breakfast in bed from Esme, and just reveled in the last few moments of closeness that they'd have until the following weekend. But they'd had to burst out of their bubble sooner than either of them wanted; they had meetings with the other faculty in residence for their halls for end of semester procedures.

Though he was still stooped over, Jasper was able to mostly walk on his own. His ankle barely hurt, for which he was grateful. Edward still insisted on walking him home, which Jasper thought was both sweet, but also a bit of an ego boost for his partner. Jasper realized that Edward didn't often get the chance to be the physically supportive one in his group, so he didn't fuss.

Edward made sure Jasper was inside before leaving him with a lingering kiss and a promise to see him at dinner. Jasper shuffled off to the shower and dressed in comfortable clothes before laying down for a little while before his meeting. He knew he had to move around more so that his back didn't seize up and take longer to heal, but he figured the walking to and from the car might have fulfilled that requirement for the time being. Thankfully, Emmett had contacted the rest of the faculty in Spader Hall and they'd agreed to meet in Jasper's room instead of the lounge, because Jasper wasn't ready to get down the flight of stairs to the basement.

"It's open!" Jasper called when Emmett (he presumed) knocked on his door to the adjoining space.

"Hey, man. How's it going?" Emmett asked as he came in, dropping into the chair at Jasper's small table.

"I'm alright," Jasper said with a partial shrug. "I'm ready for the semester to be over, I think."

"Yeah, me too. I'm looking forward to some time away with Rose," Emmett said.

"Are you going somewhere?" Jasper asked, shifting slightly so he could see his roommate.

"After New Year's," Emmett answered. "We're going to go see her family for a week. She doesn't know that it'll be for her to announce our engagement," he said with a big grin.

"When are you planning on proposing?"

"Christmas." Emmett was bouncing like a little kid in his excitement. "I've got it all planned out. I've even started looking at houses, though I know I should wait."

Jasper frowned. "You're not coming back to the dorms next term?"

"Oh, no, I'll be back. I was thinking for next year," Emmett explained quickly. "Rose probably won't want a super long engagement, but I can't imagine that even if we're not married by the time school starts again next fall she'd want to live in the dorms."

Jasper nodded. "Makes sense." He thought about him and Edward and where they might be in a year's time. Would they consider not living in the dorms? It was going to be hard enough after the six week winter break to go back to their single rooms; he couldn't imagine what it would be like after the three months of summer holidays. He'd grown so used to sharing a bed with Edward that in the weeks since Thanksgiving, sleep had come more slowly each night he spent in his own small bed.

"Yup," Emmett declared. "How about you? Plans for the break?"

Jasper shook his head. "Not really. I hadn't given it much thought. Edward has asked me to stay with him at your parents' for the break, but I haven't decided yet."

"Why not? You know mom would love to have you, and dad just likes to see her happy. The Brandons won't be around until a couple of days before Christmas, and they only stay for a week, so it's not like there won't be room." Emmett sounded genuinely confused as to why Jasper hadn't immediately accepted the invitation.

Jasper sighed softly. "I really don't want to fuck things up by moving too quickly," he explained quietly. "Christmas is a really tough time of year for me, and I can be just as bad as Edward when he's in one of his funks. But it's worse, 'cause everyone always seems to be more easily swayed by my moods, so I end up bringing everyone down with me." He took a slow, deep breath. "I don't want to ruin anyone's holidays, and I don't want to push Edward away. Six weeks is a long time for cohabitation with two people as prone to mood swings as we both are."

"Alright," Emmett said. "First, I call bullshit on the ruining of anyone's holiday. We're used to it, and we know when to give someone space. Esme loves you like another of her kids, and though she'd understand if you didn't stay, it'd probably hurt a little if you refused the invite. Besides, you'd end up there nearly every night for dinner at the very least since Bella, Alice, and Esme combined would be able to guilt you into it. So, nope, that one isn't going to work."

Jasper had to admit that the idea of being ganged up on by all three of them did not sound like an entertaining prospect in the least, and he felt himself blanch at the mention of it.

"As to Edward," Emmett continued, his voice sounding a bit more serious despite his grin. "Do you love him?"

Jasper nodded.

Emmett's grin grew into a wide smile and the childlike glee crept back into his features. "Then don't worry about it so much," he advised. "Look man, he loves you too, even if he's been too chickenshit to say anything. It's been practically written across the two of you for weeks now, and if I can see it, you know that just about everyone else has too." Emmett shifted in his chair. "I know I'm the last person you'd expect to be handing out relationship advice; that's totally more Bella's scene, but let me tell you how I figure it. You love Edward, mood swings and all. That's a part of who he is and who you love, and the same goes for you. You two can figure it out if anyone can. Besides my parents, I don't know that I've met two people with a closer bond than you two have. I don't even know that Rosie and I have the same level of connection as you do with Edward, but I know that I love her with everything that I have."

Emmett paused and ran his fingers through his close cropped curly hair. "What harm does it do to try, anyway?" he asked after a moment. "If you get there and things don't work, you can always find a hotel room for a couple of days if you need space. But not trying just because you're scared seems a bit cowardly, and I know that's not you, Jas," he said with a grin. "I know you've both got a lot of baggage," he said, his grin fading somewhat. "But I've honestly never seen anyone that makes Edward as happy as you do. And yeah, living together for six weeks may seem like a huge step when you've only known each other for four months, but it's not like there's not going to be a buffer there. All of us will be there, so it's not like you're shacking up in an apartment with no supervision," he teased.

Jasper smiled a bit. Emmett had a point.

"Anyway, you've still got a few days to make up your mind," Emmett said.

"I'm thinking about it. Thanks, Em," Jasper said.

"Anytime," Emmett responded with a grin, rising to answer the door at the knock.

The other four faculty from the hall filed into Jasper's room. He sat up and leaned against the wall, leaving room on his bed for Emmett to join him when he returned with the chair from his room.

"Good to see you up and around, Jasper," Stan said in greeting. "How are you feeling?"

"I've been better," Jasper answered, but nodded his thanks.

They made small talk for a few minutes before getting down to business and discussing what needed to be done at the end of the week. There was quite a list of things that had to be done on Saturday, once finals were over and the students were dismissed for the semester. Each room had to be checked once the students vacated by noon. Emmett and Jasper would be responsible for the rooms on their floor. The check included making sure windows were locked, no animals were left behind (students were allowed fish and small caged mammals in their rooms) and that there were no perishable food, plants, or contraband items in the rooms. The local fire department would be sweeping through all the buildings to check smoke detectors and fire alarms while the campus was empty.

The faculty members were required to be out by noon on Sunday, and - provided they were returning the following semester - could leave things behind. With the exception of the administration offices, the campus was effectively shut down until a week before classes resumed in January. Faculty could still get into their offices as needed, and the school had reserved a block of hotel rooms for displaced faculty with nowhere else to go over the break.

The meeting broke up once they'd gotten through the list of things to be done, including various postings and information that needed to get out to the students over the course of the week, and everyone left Jasper with well wishes. After rising to use the facilities and grab some water he lay back down for awhile and dozed, considering Emmett's words.

There was no reason for him to not accept Edward's offer to stay with him over the break. If they needed space, they could figure something out, but as Jasper thought back to Thanksgiving week, he realized that may not even be a problem. With everyone around, it was likely they'd get a break from each other anyway, as others would want to spend time with them.

By the time he needed to get up for dinner, Jasper had made up his mind to go with Edward for the break. He rose, took his afternoon dose of painkillers and dressed in something other than pajamas for the final all campus dinner of the semester.

The students, he observed as he hobbled into the cafeteria, hadn't been as concerned with their appearances. Classes were cancelled Monday and Friday and the students were on block schedule for their final exams on Tuesday, Wednesday and Thursday. The student council was sponsoring a Midnight Breakfast Sunday evening as a study break for the students, so he wasn't surprised to see many of them already (or still) running around in flannel pants and hoodies.

"Hi Jasper," Bella greeted him. "Can I give you a hand?" She offered with a bright smile.

"Sure, darlin'," he agreed, letting her collect a tray for the both of them. "How are you?"

She grinned at him. "I had a pretty good weekend. Got a lot of things done. How are you?"

"Better than I was. I'm looking forward to having tomorrow mostly free, too."

"That is nice," Bella agreed as they made their way around the stations and made their selections for dinner. They both selected the enchiladas, even though they both knew they wouldn't live up to either of their expectations. Jasper poured a glass of milk for himself while Bella opted for her usual hot tea and they slowly made their way out into the dining room to meet the others.

Jasper took his usual seat between Edward and Bella as everyone said hello. "Hi, love," Edward said quietly with a soft smile as Jasper eased himself into the chair. "How are you feeling?"

"A bit better," Jasper answered with a half shrug as Bella slid the tray over to him after taking her plate. "I'm moving a little easier, at least."

"Good," Edward said.

"Oh, Jasper, Dr. Harper asked to speak with you before he gives his address this evening. He said he'd come find you," Esme spoke up from between Carlisle and Alice at the round table.

Jasper nodded. "Thanks, Esme."

"What're everyone's plans for tomorrow?" Alice asked.

"I have a couple of exams to finish writing," Bella admitted, and Emmett and Rose echoed her.

"I'm making some phone calls to make arrangements for a couple of festivals and cleaning up a few things in my office," Edward said with a shrug.

"Taking it easy," Jasper said. "Why?" He asked.

"Just wondering," Alice said, mischief written across her features.

Jasper looked at her skeptically, causing her to giggle. "What are you fishing for, Alice?"

"I need to run into Port Angeles and pick up a few things tomorrow and didn't want to go by myself," she admitted.

Jasper flashed a smile at her. "Normally I'd volunteer, darlin', but I don't think I can sit in the car that long right now."

She waved off his implied apology.

"What time, Alice?" Bella asked. "If you wait until after lunch, I can go with you. I should be done by then."

Alice nodded. "Sure. Call me when you're done."

Bella agreed and dinner conversation fell into easy banter while they ate. The enchiladas weren't as bad as Jasper expected, but Bella promised that she would make her enchiladas sometime over the break.

"Excuse me for interrupting," a voice broke into their conversation and Jasper turned his head to see Dr. Harper standing just behind him. "Dr. Whitlock, may I have a word with you?"

"Of course." Jasper excused himself, feeling Edward's hand squeeze his thigh lightly under the table before Edward offered his hand to help him rise. Jasper used the table (and Edward's upper body strength) for leverage, though the motion still made him wince. Edward looked concerned but Jasper just squeezed his forearm in reassurance and followed the Dean down the hall.

They entered an alcove where they would be out of earshot of most of the people in the building.

"How are you, Jasper?" Dr. Harper asked, sounding honestly concerned.

"I'll be okay," he assured the dean. "I'm looking at a month or so before my back is feeling one hundred percent again, but otherwise everything else is more or less back to normal."

Dr. Harper nodded. "I assume that someone has filled you in about the results of the disciplinary hearing?"

"Yes, sir," Jasper responded with a small frown. "I have no objections, if that's what you mean to ask. I did at first think maybe it was a bit harsh, but based on their prior actions and how severely the student code of ethics was violated, I can understand the expulsion of the two students."

"That was partially what I wanted to ask, Jasper, and thank you. But I also wanted to find out what your intentions were in regard to legal action." The Dean began to look a bit nervous and it took a moment for Jasper to determine his meaning.

"I can assure you, Dr. Harper, I have no intention of filing any sort of lawsuit against the school. I haven't made a final decision in regards to the boys yet, though I'm leaning against it, knowing their parents would be the ones ultimately responsible, and I think they'll face enough punishment from their parents as it is."

The older man visibly relaxed upon hearing Jasper's words. "Thank you, Dr. Whitlock. Did Mrs. Cullen get the incident report paperwork to you?"

Jasper nodded. "Yes, sir, I just haven't had a chance to complete it yet. I'll have it on your desk tomorrow." He did understand the urgency, he just hadn't felt up to it Saturday.

"Alright. Thank you. I'll let you return to your dinner. I'll be addressing everyone shortly, and giving the students a sharp reminder about the conduct code," he explained. "The rumors have been quiet, thankfully, so I should be able to leave you out of it, for the most part," he offered with a small smile. "You've found yourself at the center of attention quite a bit, Jasper, since arriving here in September," he teased lightly.

"Not on purpose, believe me," Jasper responded dryly.

The Dean laughed softly. "I understand. Your students seem quite pleased with you, and it appears that you're fitting in nicely. I know this was a temporary appointment for the academic year," he said as they began walking back toward the Cullen table. "But the board will be meeting to discuss opening a search for a permanent instructor. Would you be interested, if the position becomes available?"

Jasper didn't hesitate before answering. "I would."

The Dean nodded. "I will make sure that the board is aware." He clapped Jasper lightly on the shoulder as they neared his table. "Thank you, Dr. Whitlock."

Jasper nodded and the Dean stepped away, responding to student voices that greeted him as he passed through the crowded dining hall.

"What was that about?" Edward asked softly as Jasper lowered himself back into his seat.

"Friday, mostly," Jasper answered, finding a cup of coffee in his place and everyone else working on dessert.

"Mostly?" Edward asked.

"Later," Jasper promised with a smile.

Edward nodded and pushed his plate in Jasper's direction. Jasper broke off half the chocolate chip cookie that was left on the plate and nudged it back as the PA system squawked to life.

"Good evening, members of the Forks Academy family," the Dean's voice spoke. "I welcome you to our last family dinner of the semester," he said to laughter in the room.

"We've had a great semester," he continued. "Our students have worked on some fantastic projects throughout the fall, including several members of Dr. Hale's class, who built a working submarine from paper products as part of their final project in the boat races for the advanced physics class."

A cheer went through the room and Jasper glanced at Rosalie, who had a mixture of pride and amusement on her face.

"We also had one of Ms. Brandon's students recently show several pieces in a local art walk," he announced. "And we had twenty five students qualify as finalists in the National Merit Scholarship program." Another cheer went through the crowd.

"But amongst our many accomplishments, we've also had our share of disappointments this year. Despite the unflagging leadership of Coaches Miller and Cullen the football team had a rough season, but we have hope that the basketball team will redeem us." Another wave of laughter and cheers went through the cafeteria and even Emmett had to laugh, though Jasper knew he was disappointed in the team's fate.

"We also experienced a loss in our community in the passing of Dr. Palmer's wife last month. Dr. Palmer will not be rejoining the faculty, as he has decided to move to California to live with his children."

Edward glanced at Jasper, and he nodded, knowing that Edward had put the other pieces of Jasper's conversation with the Dean together.

"We've seen members of our community face some challenges physically, emotionally, and spiritually this semester," Dr. Harper continued. "We've experienced the harsh reality of domestic violence, substance abuse, and self harm amongst our students, faculty and staff. While unfortunate, these experiences also help us to learn and grow as individuals and as a family. And as family, we look out for each other."

A murmur ran through the dining hall once more and Jasper smiled at Bella when he felt her hand slip into his.

"There has also been an unfortunate rise in the violation of the student code of conduct as of late," the dean continued. "Recently, one of our faculty members was the victim of a student prank, which, while intended to be harmless, caused this instructor to spend the night in the hospital and face a month or more of rehabilitation for his injuries. The students responsible have been expelled."

Another ripple of sound washed over everyone and Dr. Harper gave it a moment before he continued. "I highly recommend that students review the code of conduct before returning in January, and take into consideration the punishments for violating the codes. The code of conduct is not there simply for enforcing punishment," he continued. "But to help our students become model citizens by providing them with guidelines that will serve them throughout their lives. What benefit comes from cheating on a test or paper?" Dr. Harper asked. "In the end, you don't learn anything for yourself, which is a disservice to yourself, and this community.

"I don't want to focus on the negative," Dr. Harper continued. "We have, overall, had a fantastic semester, and I do not wish for the actions of a few students to bring down the rest of the community. So let me simply say that violations of the student code will not be tolerated, and that the disciplinary committee will take proper action accordingly."

There was another pause. "So, ladies and gentlemen," the Dean said brightly. "I wish to congratulate you all on a largely successful semester at Forks Academy. To the students, I say good luck on your final exams this week, and have fun at the Midnight Breakfast this evening. To the faculty I say thank you for looking after our students and for your hard work and dedication. To all I say safe travels and happy holidays, and we will see you all again in January."

With the Dean's closing remarks, applause rang through the room. Once it died down, conversations resumed around Jasper and the Cullens.

"I think he handled that well," Esme observed.

Jasper agreed. "I'm just glad to keep my name out of any other drama for awhile," he said lightly.

They chatted for awhile longer before splitting up. Carlisle and Esme headed home, and everyone else returned to the rooms for a few hours before returning to the dining hall to chaperone the Midnight Breakfast. Jasper took another hot shower to relax the muscles in his back and changed into pajamas before stretching out on his bed once more with his iPod. He drifted until a knock at his door startled him fully awake over the sounds of Rodrigo y Gabriela's rhythmic guitars.

It took him a moment to get up and shuffle to the door, but he found Edward patiently waiting on the other side. He stepped back so Edward could enter. "You didn't have to come all the way over here," Jasper said. The dining hall was halfway between Spader and Maxwell, Edward's dorm.

Edward shrugged and smiled that crooked smile that made Jasper feel warm. "I missed you." Once the door was closed behind them, Edward kissed Jasper sweetly.

"Mm," Jasper agreed. "I missed you too," he said softly after they broke apart. He kissed Edward again, just a brush of lips across each other before he crossed the room slowly and held onto the closet as he slipped into his loafers.

"Are you sure you're up for this? You really should take it easy," Edward said softly.

"I'll be okay," Jasper responded. "I want to go, and I can always leave when I'm ready, since there will be more than enough supervision."

"Okay." Edward seemed mollified by that promise.

They walked at an easy speed back to the dining hall. The stations inside had been set up with various breakfast foods, and there were several waffle irons set up for self-service. Jasper and Edward both grabbed a cup of coffee on their way through.

When they got to the tables they saw that each had been draped with a sheet of butcher paper and boxes of crayons, markers, and colored pencils had been deposited on every table. Students were already seated and drawing, looking relaxed as they took one last study break before the official dead day on Monday in preparation of exams on Tuesday.

Faculty were scattered around, most clutching coffee mugs as they wandered between tables or sat and chatted for awhile, keeping an eye on things. Jasper and Edward walked between tables for a bit, greeting students they recognized, until Jasper voiced his need to sit for awhile. Edward found them an empty table, and Alice and Bella joined them after a few minutes. After a second hour, Jasper was finding it more difficult to remain upright, so he and Edward excused themselves, leaving Alice and Bella to work on the masterpiece they'd begun on butcher paper.

"Do you want to come back to mine?" Edward asked as they pulled coats on before heading outside into the drizzle.

Jasper thought for a moment. He wanted to, but he'd need his drugs both before bed and when he woke up in the morning. "Yes," he said slowly. "But I'll need to go back to my room first," he explained. "Can I meet you back at yours in a bit?"

"No," Edward said with a playful smile. "I grabbed your pills while you were putting your shoes on," he confessed. "Come on," he said, tugging gently on Jasper's left hand with his right, and Jasper followed with a smile of his own.

Edward's room was a comfortable echo of his room at Esme and Carlisle's. Dark blue curtains concealed the clothes hanging in the closet, and a navy blue and white rug covered the tile floor. His bed was draped in a quilt of blues, black, and white and there were a few prints attached to the wall, frameless. Edward kept a large flat screen monitor on his table to hook up to the laptop to watch movies, and he had an iHome system like Jasper's on the window ledge above his bed instead of the large stereo system like his room at his parents'.

They spent the evening cuddled together on Edward's long twin bed, occasionally paying closer attention to each other and making out than to whatever DVD Edward had set up. Their intimacies didn't go beyond feeling each other up, but Jasper didn't mind. As much as he ached to have sex with Edward, he knew he wasn't physically in the position to do anything, and he really didn't want their first time to be in the tiny bed in the dorm. He only hoped that sometime in the six weeks they had off they could find some time alone, even if they had to resort to going to Seattle and getting a hotel.

Jasper slept peacefully, entwined with Edward, until Edward's alarm went off at five in the morning. Edward swatted at it with a groan and sighed. "Fuck it. I'm sleeping in," he mumbled, fumbling over his head to turn off the alarm. He hugged Jasper with the arm around his waist and drifted back off. Jasper kissed the top of his head and did the same.

He woke again a couple of hours later. Edward was laying practically on top of him, which made it easy enough for Jasper to get out of bed after shifting him to one side. He took his pills and used the bathroom. When he returned and Edward showed no signs of stirring anytime soon, he scribbled out a note and left it on the pillow next to Edward and began his trek back across campus to his room to begin his day of laying around. He could have stayed with Edward, but he wanted a shower and he had some work he needed to do and needed his computer to do it.

Jasper passed his day working on a few things to tie up loose ends. He chatted with Edward through the IM service as Edward worked on something as well. They met up with the others at dinner and after the meal, he and Edward went back to their own rooms, mostly because Jasper had a long day of finals he needed to be ready for. Edward had a lighter load of classes, so his finals schedule was a bit more open than Jasper's.

The three days of final exams passed in a blur as Jasper had to sit through three hour sessions to administer each of his tests. Thankfully he had a break Wednesday afternoon to start grading Tuesday's exams. Friday morning Jasper slept in; grades weren't due for a week, and he needed to help supervise the floor as students began moving out for the break. After lingering under a hot shower to relax a bit, Jasper dressed in jeans and a t-shirt and propped his door open so he could keep an ear on what was going on in the hall.

Ordinarily he'd have been helping students shift boxes or luggage out to waiting parents' cars or bringing up storage bins from the basement, but he left that task to Emmett and instead fielded all kinds of random questions from students and parents alike. He helped where he could, but he mostly paced the halls, rolling his eyes every time Emmett strongly suggested he take a break. Jasper's back hurt, but he had responsibilities – when he pointed out to Emmett that Edward was doing the same on the other side of campus, Emmett was quick to argue that it wasn't the same thing.

"How, exactly, is it not the same thing?" Jasper drawled, fixing Emmett with a stare.

"Edward knows how to pace himself?" Emmett suggested half-heartedly.

"Weak, Em," Jasper answered. "Look, I'm not doing any heavy lifting or anything, but I've got to do my part with all this."

"No, you don't," Emmett shot back. "Take it easy, man. It's only been a week, and I know injuries like those don't heal fast. Besides, you're limping, and we've got the Holiday party tonight."

"I am not," Jasper tried to answer but realized that Emmett was right and he was favoring his right ankle, which probably wasn't helping his back any. He swore softly and sighed; he'd almost forgotten about the faculty and staff party the dean and his wife were hosting.

Emmett looked smug and Jasper just ignored him as they were approached by two sets of parents; one went off with Emmett to help move boxes and Jasper answered a question about whether or not the mattresses would be cleaned before the next term began. When the over-anxious parents had wrung all the information they could from Jasper and returned to their son's room, Jasper resumed his slow pacing of the hall, checking in on students' progress and keeping an eye on the few whose parents hadn't yet shown up.

"Jasper, son, you should take a break," Carlisle said from behind him.

"I'm fine," Jasper answered, turning to face the man who'd become something of a father figure to him.

Carlisle fixed him with a look that was a mix of a disappointed parent and concerned physician. "You're not," he said softly. "You're practically bent in half," he observed. "When was the last time you took something?"

"When I got up," Jasper said, glancing at his watch. He hadn't realized it had gotten so late, but it was after two in the afternoon. "About five hours."

Carlisle sighed. "You're obviously in pain. All you need to do is speak to Dr. Harper and he'd understand. I'll even provide you with a doctor's note, if he requires it."

Jasper shook his head and followed as Carlisle started down the hall toward Jasper's room. "I'm just trying to do my job," he stated.

"You've got to take care of yourself first, Jasper," Carlisle chided. He sighed again. "Take your next dose of ibuprofen and then I'll move your chair and table out into the hall so you can sit. But first," he said as they reached Jasper's room. "Lie down for a few minutes and let me look at your ankle."

Jasper did as instructed, kicking off his loafers before he settled back on the bed. Carlisle perched on the edge as he rolled up Jasper's pant leg and gave his ankle a once over.

"Well it looks fine, but you're going to take it easy for the rest of the afternoon. Emmett's next call was going to be Edward, but I talked him out of it," he said with a smirk.

"Thank you," Jasper said sincerely. The last thing he wanted was for Edward to worry unnecessarily (and for them to argue in the middle of the hall while surrounded by students moving out).

"Any time. Stay there for awhile." It wasn't a suggestion, so Jasper relaxed and stared up at the ceiling while he listened to Carlisle shift his table and chair out into the hall. A half hour later, the doctor returned and let Jasper return to his duties, provided he stayed off his feet for most of the afternoon until he had to get ready for the party.

Jasper all but collapsed into bed Friday night, exhausted from chasing after students followed by a fairly lively party. Dr. Harper and his wife, Linda, had thrown a great party off campus. Jasper and Edward had mingled with the rest of the faculty and staff, and somehow he'd ended up dancing with both Bella and Alice at one point, though he had a feeling he mostly looked like he'd been shuffling along. They returned to campus around midnight, and Jasper fell pretty quickly into sleep. Despite the late night on Friday, he woke feeling refreshed Saturday morning, ready for another day of supervising the last of the students to move out and then doing walk-throughs with Emmett. The girls were planning on coming over to help him pack when they were finished with their own rounds, before dinner at the Cullens.

After handing out a citation to the last student to leave his floor at one in the afternoon (an hour past the deadline), Jasper collected Emmett and they began sweeping the rooms. They fell into a comfortable pattern; Jasper checked the hot water and toilet in each bathroom while Emmett double checked all the window locks and that the heaters had been turned off for the break. They placed any plants or food into the hallway for Emmett to pick up in a sweep when they were done. It took them just over two hours to check all twenty five suites on their floor.

Bella was waiting in his room with a sandwich that wasn't from the dining hall, which had closed after brunch service at two.

"Thanks, Darlin'," Jasper said as he took it from her. Breakfast had been hours earlier and he was hungry, tired, and sore.

She gave him a big smile. "No problem. Now, where should I start?" she asked.

Jasper had already, once again, gathered his dirty laundry into the basket. "Uhm, clothes?" he suggested. "Suitcases are under the bed," he said with a wave of his hand.

She nodded and looked pointedly between him and the bed, and with a sigh, he took the hint and laid down while she dug out his luggage and started folding his clean clothes into it. After he ate, he stretched out and stared at the ceiling, clicking his iPod on with the remote. He'd last listened to a country playlist and he turned the volume down to low while they chatted over nothing of consequence while Bella worked on packing his clothes. He really doubted he'd need everything for the time he was gone, but rather than decide what to take, he just let Bella pack it all; he didn't have much anyway.

"Jas, what's this?" she said, after awhile, holding out the garment bag that held his dress blues and duty uniform, the logo facing away from her.

He swallowed harshly. "Nothin' important. You can leave it hanging. I don't need it." He tried to speak casually, but he heard the edge of sadness that crept into his tone.

Bella turned the bag toward her and frowned as she took in the stamp. "Ah. Okay." She placed it back in the closet with a gentleness he hadn't expected. She abandoned the packing for a moment to cross to the bed and sat with him for a moment before shifting to lie next to him, putting her head on his shoulder.

"What's up, darlin?" He asked quietly.

She shook her head. "Just looked like you could use a hug, and this was the best I could do at the moment."

Jasper laughed softly and draped his arm around her shoulders in a hug. "Thanks."

"Why do you keep it, if it makes you sad?" she asked softly after a moment.

He thought for a second before answering. "It's something of my past that I can't let go of," he explained. "It's the tangible reminder of the life I led, and even if I can't wear it anymore, or bring myself to look at it, I know that someday I'd regret it if I threw it out."

"I guess I can understand that," Bella said with a small smile.

"Ah, this is quite the little scene." Alice's voice washed over them and Jasper lifted his head slightly to see her and Rose in the doorway. "Comfy?"

"Yes," Bella answered, and Jasper glanced at her, grinning at the faint blush that painted her cheeks.

Jasper laughed quietly as Rose and Alice stepped in, taking a look around. "Well, it looks like you're mostly packed up anyway," Rose observed. "Unless there's more than clothes you're taking with you?"

"Not really," he answered. "Clothes, laptop, iPod, guitar," he listed off. "And any perishable food left in the pantry," he said. "I don't have much. Oh, and my bamboo and plant," he said, pointing back over his head to the hanging plant and the small container of bamboo in the window.

"Well, let's finish, and that way we can grab your stuff tonight when we go to dinner, and Edward can get his tomorrow before we're kicked out at noon," Alice said.

Bella gave Jasper a light pat on his stomach before she rolled away and got to her feet to finish putting all but a couple things into his bags (so he'd have clothes for the next day, he assumed). It took them only another fifteen minutes to finish packing up all of his clothes (he felt weird about watching them throw his underwear around) and zip up his bags.

"Alright, Emmett will grab your bags before we leave," Rosalie said. "There'll be room with my bags. Em's going to pack tonight, but not get his things until tomorrow."

Jasper nodded. "Thanks, ladies." He rose to give them all hugs on their way out and promised to see them at dinner in a couple of hours. Tense and feeling dirty from going through all the rooms earlier, Jasper decided on a shower before Edward arrived to get him for dinner. He let the hot water relax the tense muscles of his back and returned to his bed after he dressed in the jeans and tshirt Bella had left out after stuffing the sleep clothes into his messenger bag with his computer. The iPod still played softly in the background and he dozed until he felt the bed dip and a warm presence join him.

"Do you want to skip dinner tonight?" Edward asked him quietly as he shifted to lie next to Jasper.

"No," Jasper said with a smile. "Just had a long day. I'm fine." He turned his head to face Edward and kissed his forehead, all that he could reach without moving too far. "Besides, Esme's making lasagna and I'm not passing that up for anything," he teased.

Edward laughed quietly next to him. "Yeah, I wouldn't either," he answered lightly.

They lay together for awhile, just quietly being in each other's space until Edward sighed softly and kissed Jasper's chin. "We should go," he said, a regretful note in his voice.

Jasper agreed and they rose. He looked around the room to make sure there was nothing else he needed to grab to take with them. He tucked his prescription ibuprofen into his messenger bag and made sure the adjoining door was unlocked for Emmett. "We're staying over tonight, right?" He clarified with Edward as he locked his door and pocketed his keys.

Edward nodded. "I'll come back tomorrow morning with Em and grab my bags and whatever else I'll need." The dorms would be locked down after one in the afternoon on Sunday, so anything they needed for the break they had to take with them.

Jasper bit his tongue before he could ask Edward yet again if he was sure about having Jasper invade his space for the next several weeks. Each time he did, Edward got more and more exasperated, and Jasper was just trying to convince himself that Edward was okay with it and that it was only his own insecurities that kept him looking for confirmation.

The Cullen home was a mix of scents when Jasper and Edward arrived, letting themselves in. The large Christmas tree dominated the living room, casting off scents of pine. Esme's cooking smelled delicious as it also wafted through the house, mixing with other holiday smells of vanilla, cinnamon, and other spices. There was a fire roaring in the hearth, adding to the atmosphere as Jasper and Edward stripped out of their coats and called out.

"Hello, boys," Esme greeted them, coming out of the kitchen to give them each a hug. "Emmett took your stuff upstairs, Jasper," she explained. "And they've gone back to get some of Rose's things. Bella and Alice called and are bringing her stuff tonight also, because they'll need both cars for Alice's."

Jasper nodded his understanding and kissed Esme's cheek. He wasn't sure how he felt about tackling the flight of stairs, but he knew it was either Edward's room, or the temporary guest room in the basement, so either way, he was going to have to manage.

"Is there anything we can help with, Mom?" Edward asked.

She waved him off. "Everything's under control. Relax," she said with a smile and took herself back into the kitchen.

Carlisle emerged from his study. "Hello, Son, Jasper," he greeted them. "How are you feeling?" he addressed Jasper, and he couldn't help feel like he was being studied.

"Okay. I can stand up almost straight," he said with a grin. So long as he remembered the pain medication he was able to move around okay. He felt like a complete sloth for not being able to get to the gym for a week, and he knew it would be a couple more until he could get back into more of his regular routine.

"Good. I have some exercises you can start doing to help build some stamina back up and strengthen the muscles in your back," Carlisle said. "I'll dig them out for you."

"Thanks," Jasper said with a nod, feeling Edward take his hand and he was tugged gently toward the couch, Carlisle's laughter trailing them. Jasper let Edward push him down onto the couch and got situated before Edward joined him, his back to Jasper's chest as they laid on their sides, facing the TV.

They talked quietly for awhile as Edward flipped through the channels. Esme bustled around, leaving them be, and Carlisle occasionally wandered in and out of the living room, looking for his wife. Jasper soaked up the feelings of family and home that swirled around them and just felt happy.

Alice and Bella arrived with her bags, which they carried down to the makeshift guest room in the basement. The Brandons would be arriving on Wednesday afternoon, and rather than have Bella move between rooms, she'd decided she'd just stay in the basement, and Alice could have the upstairs guest room after her parents left after New Year's when Esme and Carlisle took their holiday. They returned upstairs after a couple moments with two large paper sacks, out of which they pulled wrapped packages and placed them in the growing pile under the tree.

"We still have to go shopping," Jasper reminded Edward quietly. They hadn't had time with finals week.

"Hm," Edward mused. "I have to move out tomorrow, and I have therapy Monday afternoon. How about Tuesday?" He suggested. "The malls will be madhouses, but if we get up early and head for Seattle, we might get lucky."

Jasper grinned against the back of Edward's neck. "Thinking about getting lucky?" Jasper felt the skin of Edward's neck heat up against his nose as he nuzzled Edward lightly. The girls giggled.

"In more ways than one," Edward said in a husky voice that made Jasper shiver.

"Tuesday works," Jasper said, his voice rough. "And maybe you'll get your wish," he whispered for Edward's ears only. Edward retaliated by rocking his hips back against Jasper's. Jasper was quick to put a stop to any further teasing; they weren't alone and it'd been far too long since they'd had any significant private time when one of them wasn't injured or ill.

"You do realize that Tuesday is three days before Christmas and that it's likely to be a zoo at the mall no matter what time you go?" Bella asked as she settled into one of the large chairs with Alice to watch TV with them.

Jasper just shrugged.

Rose and Emmett arrived not too long after with Rose's suitcases and a couple of boxes, which they carried up to Emmett's room. Just as they came back down, Esme called everyone for supper.

It was another lively Cullen family meal as everyone passed around lasagna, garlic bread, and salad, and Jasper noted he wasn't the only one teasing Edward about his salad eating habits anymore. Desert was a decadent tiramisu and they all lingered over coffee and conversation.

After dinner, Esme nearly begged Edward to play for everyone. Edward only relented after Jasper agreed to join him on the guitar.

"I'm sorry, that was presumptuous of me," Edward said as they slowly climbed the stairs to find Jasper's guitar. "I didn't even think to ask if you read music or know all the Christmas carols or even do more than dabble or…"

Jasper kissed him to stop his (admittedly adorable) babbling. "It's fine. I do, to all of those things," he assured him. "Don't worry about it."

Edward nodded and they retrieved his beat up black case with his acoustic and made their way back downstairs. The music room turned out to have a removable wall that kept Edward's piano isolated when he was practicing or wanted privacy, but could be pulled out of the way providing a comfortable space for everyone to be able to sit around and listen.

Esme had found Jasper a chair and set it close to the curve of the piano, but he nudged it toward the bench before he sat and pulled his guitar from the case, tuning her gently as Edward played a few chords. While he tuned, Edward pulled a few fake books from within the bench in case they needed them. Jasper kicked his open case slightly out of the way as they settled in and the rest of the family gathered round after shifting a few pieces of furniture.

"Any requests?" Edward asked as he shifted slightly on the bench.

"The First Noël?" Esme suggested softly.

Edward glanced at Jasper and he nodded. Jasper easily slid into accompanying Edward on the piano, finding harmonies and setting up an easy countermelody. After the first time through the melody, Esme joined them, singing softly, her voice strong but quiet and on key as they worked their way through the verses. The whole family joined in on the refrain, and Jasper couldn't help the grin that spread over his face as they came together. The Cullen family never ceased to amaze him.

They quickly established a pattern. Whoever requested the tune would be on their own for the main verse, but the family supported the chorus. They played and sang for hours, everyone taking turns to call out their favorite songs, and they stopped after awhile for an eggnog or cocoa break before they moved into more commercial songs. When they got to Sleigh Ride, Emmett provided both the sound effects for the whip, the hoof beats and the horse whinny at the end. Jasper and Edward switched off on carrying melodies and harmonies and everyone seemed to be having a very good time just being together.

While Edward took a break, Jasper played Carol of the Bells, his eyes closed as his fingers worked from memory to produce one of Amber's favorites. It had been one of the first tunes he'd learned, his mama teaching him the basic melody at first, and then he'd slowly worked it into the more complex solo piece through the years. He'd finished it for what turned out to be their last Christmas together. He let the final chord linger for a moment as he sent a silent prayer to his family for a merry Christmas.

He looked over his shoulder when he felt Edward behind him, and offered him a small, sad smile. Edward seemed to understand and kissed the top of his head before retaking the piano bench and plunging them into a jazzy rendition of God Rest Ye Merry Gentlemen.

They continued for awhile longer until Esme yawned and slumped against Carlisle. "I think it's about that time," he said. "Edward?"

Edward smiled and nodded and turned to Jasper. "Silent Night."

Jasper began the melody softly, and just as they'd begun, Edward joined him in harmony and on the second time through the melody the whole family joined in. Esme and Carlisle wished them all a good night with hugs before they shuffled off to bed, and everyone else soon followed, leaving Jasper and Edward alone. Jasper slowly packed up his guitar while Edward lowered the dust shield over the keys of the piano.

Edward took Jasper's hand as they left the music room, turning the lights out on their way.

"I had a thought," Edward spoke into the darkness as they navigated their way to and up the stairs. Jasper was still sore and so the stairs were a slow journey, but Edward seemed nothing but patient.

"Yeah?" Jasper prompted, gripping the banister in his right hand as they slowly climbed.

"For the spring concert, a number of the faculty get together and perform as a small combo…" he trailed off, and Jasper knew he was unsure about what he was about to ask. "I thought maybe you and I could…."

Jasper squeezed his hand gently. He knew that Edward wasn't all that comfortable playing even in front of his family, and that volunteering them to play in front of not only the school community but the rest of Forks was a big step for him. "If you'd like to, I'd be willing. Are you thinking a duet, or a larger combo?"

He felt Edward relax minutely once Jasper hadn't dismissed the idea out of hand. "Both?" he asked shyly. "Maybe we could play with the jazz combo, but do a duet at the Wind Ensemble concert if Dr. Adams has room on the program?"

"Sure, babe," Jasper said easily. "I'd like that." Playing with Edward had seemed like almost everything else Jasper had experienced with his partner: easy without having to really try.

Edward tugged on his hand and Jasper paused just as they reached the top of the stairs. Edward's lips were warm and smooth against Jasper's, and Jasper could taste the hint of rum from the eggnog on Edward's lips and tongue. "Thank you," Edward said quietly when they broke apart.

Jasper merely kissed him again, and they proceeded down the hall to Edward's room, to get ready for bed.

* * *

Fake books: books of melodies, basic chords, and lyrics used by musicians. It's just enough information for a musician to be able to improvise or 'fake' an arrangement of their own. They're particularly used in jazz where improvisation is a valued skill and there's a large library of 'standards.'

There are videos embedded at the blog for your musical enjoyment/reference for what was playing in my head.


	26. Chapter 25: Family Holiday Fun

Naelany and wishingforlove continue to be awesome betas.

My readers rock my socks. Thanks to all for leaving over 1k reviews. You have no idea how much this makes me smile to think about.

And now, onto something y'all've been waiting for (and I'm pretty sure I just created a new contraction there).

* * *

**Family Holiday Fun, or Cockblocked, Shopping, and Christmas Eve**

"Hey bro."

Edward woke to the sound of Emmett's voice and a light tap on the door. He stirred and blinked his eyes open, trying to focus on Emmett's face without the benefit of corrective lenses.

"We gotta get a move on," Emmett said.

Edward nodded and yawned. "I'll be down in a couple minutes."

Emmett nodded and ducked back out, closing the door behind him. Edward had asked his brother to wake him Sunday morning to get back to school for their things so that he wouldn't have to wake Jasper with the alarm. As he sat up, he fumbled on the bedside table for his glasses and slipped them on before reaching for the pills and bottle of water that he always set out before bed. He took his morning dose and drained the water bottle before dressing in jeans and a t-shirt, not bothering with a shower until he was finished with things.

Jasper hadn't stirred, but he smiled softly as Edward kissed his forehead before leaving, grabbing his cane from where it was perched handily against the night stand. He found Emmett downstairs munching on a slice of toast. Edward grabbed a banana from the fruit basket. At Emmett's nod they found their keys and set out in their own vehicles back to campus. Edward let the radio play quietly, too tired to be introspective as he found himself humming along.

He parked alongside Emmett's jeep and made his walk across campus to his building. He didn't have much to pack besides clothes, so it didn't take him very long to get everything together. He'd still be able to get into his office, so he wasn't worried about gathering any of the materials he'd want over the break; he wouldn't be working on anything until after Christmas, anyway. He needed to start making arrangements for the spring events, but it could all keep, possibly until after the New Year.

He double checked the kitchenette for any perishables and gathered everything into a paper bag that was in the stack under the sink. He had a feeling that his mom would be doing something for dinner that would use up all the leftovers they all brought to the house. Edward's contribution would be a half quart of milk, two thirds of a loaf of bread and a half a block of cheese. He figured the jelly in the fridge would keep, and he knew the peanut butter in the pantry would be fine.

Edward shoved his laptop into the carrying case and dropped it on the bed next to his suitcases and duffel bag (which was full of his dirty laundry). He did another quick sweep and found that he had pretty much everything he thought he could need for the next six weeks and piled everything up by the door to wait for Emmett so they could make one trip to the cars.

He didn't have to wait long for his brother. "So, I was thinking we could stop off and pick up donuts and pastries," Emmett said as he hefted Edward's suitcases and duffel, leaving Edward with the grocery bag and laptop.

"Yeah, 'cept you know Mom's already got breakfast going," Edward protested. He liked the idea, in theory.

"Well, there'd be nothing wrong with supplementing her meal, right?" Emmett turned his well practiced puppy dog eyes to Edward, who rolled his eyes.

"Alright," Edward said on a sigh. "Big baby."

Emmett beamed and they crossed campus quickly to their cars. Edward's stuff all fit in his trunk and he agreed to meet Emmett at the grocery store for the carbohydrate portion of breakfast. Just as he pulled into the parking lot of the store, his phone beeped with a message.

_Pls pu oj_ from Esme. Edward sent back a quick affirmative reply and tagged along with Emmett. While his big (in every sense of the word) brother deliberated over donuts, croissants, muffins, danishes, etc, Edward hobbled around the corner to pick up two gallons of juice. He knew his mother loved having a house full, and the addition of Jasper wasn't really all that much, but it took a lot to keep all eight of them fed, especially with Emmett and Alice's appetites. He went back to Emmett and dropped the juice into the cart that he'd gotten and already filled with two boxes of a dozen donuts each and was filling a third with pastries.

"Get a couple plain croissants," Edward directed.

"Why?" Emmett asked, looking over his shoulder.

"Have you ever seen Jasper eat anything sweet for breakfast?" Edward pointed out.

"Hm. Not really," Emmett answered grudgingly and selected two of the flaky pastries and put them in the box alongside everything else, including the bear claws that were Rosalie's semi-secret indulgence. "That it?"

"I think so. Mom didn't ask for anything else," Edward explained as Emmett took control of the cart and steered them toward the checkout. Emmett paid and they loaded the groceries into the back seat of Edward's Volvo since his trunk was full.

Alice and Bella's cars were gone when Edward got back to his parents' house, and he figured they'd gone back to campus for Alice's things. Esme met them at the door as Emmett carried the boxes of goodies and Edward handed off one of the jugs of orange juice to his mom as he kissed her cheek.

"Thank you, boys," she said. "I was just going to set out a light spread since everyone seems to be doing their own things this morning. This is perfect," she declared as they shuffled everything into the kitchen before going back out for their bags.

Edward found Jasper still in bed when he carried one suitcase and laptop upstairs after dropping the groceries in the kitchen with Esme and his duffel bag in the laundry room. The blonde had stretched out on the full sized bed, sleeping diagonally across the bed on his back, one arm flung over his eyes. Edward kicked off his shoes and propped his cane up against the night stand before crawling back onto the bed with Jasper.

"Hm." Jasper hummed contentedly and hugged Edward closer when Edward snuggled up to his side. "Time izzit?" he mumbled, his southern twang more prevalent in his sleep thickened voice.

"Not quite ten," Edward answered quietly. "We don't have anywhere to be, so we can lay here all day," he said suggestively.

Jasper smiled sleepily as he turned his head to kiss Edward lightly, never opening his eyes. "I may just take you up on that." He sighed. "But I need to take a leak and get some food and painkillers into me."

"We could eat and come back to bed?" Edward suggested.

Jasper's smile broadened slightly. "They won't miss us?"

"Not much," Edward answered dryly. "At least I hope not," he said.

"Sounds like a plan, then." Jasper finally stirred and stretched and Edward shifted to sit up to let him out of the bed.

When Jasper returned from the bathroom and tugged on a shirt, they made their way downstairs. Esme had laid out what amounted to a continental breakfast. The donuts and pastries were out on cake stands, and there was a selection of apples, oranges, and grapes in a bowl. Several boxes of cereal were out, along with a loaf of bread, butter, peanut butter, and jam. There was fresh coffee and Edward laughed when he spotted the plastic jug of milk in a wine bucket with ice.

It was a quiet and low key meal, and when they got back upstairs, Edward changed into a clean pair of pajama bottoms and rejoined Jasper in bed. Jasper had settled up against the headboard and Edward snuggled up to his side, his shoulder blade against Jasper's as they overlapped slightly. He felt Jasper's arm along his back and then fingers in Edward's hair made his eyes droop a bit as he sighed.

"What are your plans after New Year's?" Jasper asked quietly.

"I have some work to do on getting festivals settled. I need to make hotel arrangements and get a bus reserved and figure out if we're going to Hawaii for spring break," Edward said.

"Will you need chaperones?" Jasper said, nudging him lightly.

Edward laughed and turned to kiss him softly. "I'm sure we can work something out. But other than getting some charts pulled and making plans for spring, I hadn't planned on much. You?" Edward relaxed back against Jasper and smiled at the feeling of being taken care of with Jasper's gentle touch.

"I think we should go away for a weekend," Jasper suggested. "Even if we just go to Seattle or Portland," he said. "We missed out on Mid-semester break, and I think we could both use the chance to get out of town and away from everyone and everything."

Edward really liked that idea. Especially the part where they could be alone for a few days. "I like it," he said. "Esme and Carlisle will be leaving for their annual two week trip to their private retreat off the coast of Brazil. Em and Rosalie are going to see her family on the East Coast, and if Bella sticks to her routine, she'll be locked away writing for most of the break."

"So no one would miss us anyway?" Jasper said with a laugh.

"Pretty much, yeah," Edward agreed. "If we time it right, anyway."

"Then we'd better time it right." Jasper kissed him, his fingers curling into Edward's hair and tugging lightly as his tongue brushed against Edward's lips. Edward's lips parted and he moaned quietly into the kiss, shifting to make the angle less awkward as he returned Jasper's kiss, ending up straddling his lap. The kiss grew more heated and Edward felt Jasper respond under him, their thin pajama pants providing little concealment, and he gasped against Jasper's lips when the blonde's hips arched up against Edward's.

Edward's hands slipped under the hem of Jasper's shirt and he had it off in a moment. The chiseled muscles of Jasper's abs twitched as Edward ran his fingertips over them, up to his chest. Edward scraped a nail over one of his nipples and Jasper moaned softly in response; he was more sensitive than Edward. Edward's other hand curled around Jasper's neck.

He felt Jasper's hand at the base of his spine under his shirt, gently urging Edward closer. Jasper's mouth moved off of Edward's, his nose tracing the line of his jaw before he started kissing and nipping at the tender skin under his chin. Jasper kissed Edward's Adam's apple and nosed at his collarbone around his shirt before Edward tipped Jasper's face up long enough to strip out of his shirt and drop it behind him on the mattress. He pressed himself closer to Jasper, pushing his lover back into the pillows and headboard so he wouldn't have to move much as Edward resituated themselves. They both bit back quiet moans as Edward's movements caused their cocks to slide against each other through their thin pants.

Edward kissed his way up Jasper's neck, feeling the soft vibration of Jasper's slightly ragged breathing against his lips as he worked up to his ear. "I'm still thinking about having sex with you," he whispered before he tugged Jasper's earlobe between his teeth.

"Soon, baby," Jasper assured him, his head falling back slightly with a whimper. His hands skated over Edward's back, dipping to his ass and giving it a squeeze, making them both hiss again as they were forced closer together, their hips beginning to rock as they sought out the friction their bodies could provide.

"Hey, Edward, do you – oh fuck!" Emmett barged into the room without knocking.

Edward buried his face in the crook of Jasper's neck, feeling his partner's arms come around him as he shook, with probably a mixture of lust, rage, and amusement.

"Well, we would have if you hadn't interrupted," Jasper said, still trying to catch his breath. But his hands were soothing on Edward's back, and the brief kiss to Edward's temple was reassuring.

"Knocking, right, I remember," Emmett muttered. "Uhm…I'll come back?"

Edward sighed and pulled himself away from Jasper, turning slightly to reach for his shirt and address his brother. "What do you need, Em?" He settled with his back against Jasper's chest after he'd tugged his shirt back on; Jasper's had been tossed to the floor. Jasper's arms snaked back around his waist and Edward relaxed.

"The rest of us were thinking about going out for a movie and whatever meal would come after. Wanna go?" Emmett was apparently quickly over his gaffe and was back to his normal jovial self.

Edward glanced over his shoulder at Jasper, who nodded. "Sure."

"Okay, well, the girls are pouring over the listings so you may want to uh, clean yourselves up?" He suggested, waggling his eyebrows.

"Out, Emmett," Edward ordered, pointing toward the door.

"I'll lock it this time, too," his brother offered, his booming laughter echoing as he shut the door behind him.

Edward slumped into Jasper's embrace, smiling when he felt Jasper's laughter run through him. "It could have been worse," Jasper counseled quietly, kissing the top of his head before resting his chin there. "It could have been Esme."

"Oh, God," Edward moaned. "I had enough of that in high school, thank you very much."

Jasper just laughed harder. "Come on. They're not going to wait for us."

"Good," Edward decided. "You know he's down there telling them everything."

"So?" Jasper nudged him and Edward turned slightly. "We had clothes on. Sort of," he said with a grin. "I'm not ashamed to have been caught making out with you, Edward, though I do wish he hadn't interrupted."

"Hm." Edward kissed Jasper firmly. "Me too."

They quickly cleaned up and put on real clothes before joining the others downstairs. The girls and Emmett argued over a movie and eventually settled on a generic romantic comedy while Edward and Jasper sat close together on the couch and mocked Emmett for arguing with them. It wasn't that he was arguing so much that amused Edward, but that he was vying for a different romantic comedy than the girls instead of the action drama he'd anticipated his brother to fight for.

They finally decided on a film that started within the hour and they ended up riding in three separate cars because Emmett didn't trust Edward and Jasper alone in the back seat of his jeep and Alice and Bella had some last minute shopping to do after the movie and they ate. They bid Esme farewell as they set out, letting her know they were eating out.

"You know, you'd think he could cut us a little slack," Edward grumbled as he drove, following the caravan of the others. "He hasn't been cut off for weeks."

Jasper smiled and stretched his arm between their seats and gently rubbed his thumb along the column of Edward's neck. "I'm sure with a few well placed words to Rose we could remedy that." His thumb slowed and Edward glanced over to see Jasper looking thoughtful. "I think he's just happy to see you with someone and happy again is all," he said. "He teases you because he knows he'll get a reaction."

Edward knew that was true and yet he couldn't stop himself from responding to Emmett's goading. He sighed.

Jasper laughed quietly and leaned over the console. "Let it go," he whispered into Edward's ear before kissing him softly on the tender skin behind and slightly below his ear sending a shiver through Edward. He was beginning to rethink the plans for the movie, knowing they'd be alone in the house if they turned around now. Jasper chuckled softly and sat back in his seat, continuing to calm him slightly with the touch on his neck.

They met the others in the lobby after purchasing tickets and trailed Emmett and Alice to the concessions stand. Edward and Jasper decided to split a popcorn and root beer and waited for the others to get their snacks.

The movie wasn't as horrible as Edward expected based on the description, and sandwiched as he and Jasper were between Emmett and Alice, they couldn't do much but focus on the movie. When it was over, they stood around the lobby discussing their options for a late lunch or early supper and Jasper put in a vote for real Mexican food, but was overruled by everyone else. Bella promised to treat him to a spread worthy of a fiesta after Christmas, and they ended up at a local barbecue house, which seemed to satisfy all of them.

After Jasper somehow managed to pay for everyone's dinner, they split up for the evening. "Feel up to a walk?" Edward asked Jasper.

"Sure," Jasper agreed. They left the car parked at the restaurant and strolled around the downtown area, taking in the sights of the lit buildings and holiday decorations.

"One of my favorite things during the holidays was going through neighborhoods looking at all the houses lit up," Jasper said quietly, a faraway look in his eyes and a sad smile on his face.

Edward gave their clasped hands a squeeze. There was a tour through some of the affluent neighborhoods, but he chose to stay silent on the offering, not wanting Jasper to think he was out to replace the memories that his lover had of Christmases past spent with his family. "Esme used to drag us out caroling," Edward said instead. "Emmett hated it, and when he was twelve, she finally stopped," he remembered fondly. "But that was the year Carlisle started making us volunteer at the hospital in the kids' ward. He worked at the hospital until Emmett and I went off to university, and then took the appointment at the school because it would allow him more time with Esme, with us out of the house. He dressed up as Santa until Emmett was big enough to do it himself, and we'd deliver presents gathered by the staff to the kids that were too ill to get home for the holiday."

"Do you still do it?" Jasper asked.

Edward nodded. "We usually go after dinner on Christmas day. Esme makes extra food for the families that are staying so they get a home cooked meal."

"That's very nice of her," he observed.

Edward shrugged. "She knows what it means to lack a few necessities. Her family wasn't wealthy growing up, and she had an older brother who died of leukemia, so the experience of passing the holidays in the hospital is one she remembers well. It's her and Carlisle's way of giving back."

Jasper nodded. "So, I need to plan to pick up a few gifts for kids when we're out shopping on Tuesday?"

"Carlisle has a list." Edward smiled brightly and kissed his lips gently. "I love you." He loved that Jasper was so easy about working into family traditions and just seemed to know what everyone needed. Their performance the night before only cemented that.

Jasper returned both the smile and the kiss. "You too."

Monday passed quietly without much fanfare. Esme had to work a half-day at the office and Carlisle went with her to finish closing down things for the end of the year at the clinic on campus. Edward and Jasper slept in and hung around the house until Edward went to his weekly torture session with Jane.

They went to bed early Monday night so they could get up early on Tuesday to go shopping in Seattle. They arrived at the mall around ten, and once again, Edward's handicapped placards enabled them to park and walk to the shops without having to catch a shuttle from a nearby lot. The parking lot was already mostly full.

"Do you have any idea where you want to start?" Edward asked Jasper as he twined his right hand around Jasper's left and they made their way inside.

"Toy store," Jasper answered. "I have a few things I want to get, plus the gifts for the kids from the list Carlisle gave me."

"Okay," Edward agreed. "Any other particular destinations in mind?"

"Bookstore," Jasper responded. "Other than that, I have no idea."

Edward smiled and squeezed his hand as they entered the mall, noise and heat washing over them, making Edward glad he'd dressed lightly. He led the way with a gentle tug on Jasper's hand and led him to Toys 'R' Us attached to the mall. Jasper grabbed a cart and Edward walked alongside while Jasper pushed.

"What's on your list, Jas?" Edward asked.

Jasper pulled it from his pocket. "Barbie and accessories, legos, coloring books and crayons, stuffed animals, race cars…" he trailed off with a shrug and flashed Edward a sheepish smile. "You may have to cut me off."

Edward laughed and wrapped his arm around Jasper's waist in a half hug. "We'll go halves, alright?"

Jasper kissed his temple and agreed. They made their rounds through the store and he watched as Jasper tossed a few things into his cart that weren't on the list, but he evaded Edward's question about them. Edward wondered what he was doing with a toy doctor's kit and several packs of miniature cars he remembered playing with as a kid, but let it go. Jasper was clearly up to something he didn't want Edward to know about.

They bought enough toys that they had to go drop everything at the car before returning to the mall to re-start their holiday shopping.

Jasper detoured into a candy shop and Edward watched him pick out a bunch of gummy food: hamburgers, hotdogs, nachos, tacos, etc. Edward made a face and Jasper laughed as he moved to the counter to pay.

They shopped for a couple more hours until they decided they needed to stop for lunch and, like a couple of old men, take their medicine. Jasper had started cutting back on his ibuprofen as the muscles in his back started to loosen and he worked on the exercises his dad had given his partner. Edward was more faithfully following the regimen he and Dr. Card had agreed on at Thanksgiving and he had to admit, he felt better for it. He knew why he'd resisted for such a long time, but he finally realized how stupid and stubborn he'd been about the whole thing.

Rather than brave a restaurant, they went through the food court and ended up with Chinese. They snagged a small table and shoved their bags under their feet while they ate. With the music, chatter, and noise from the food stations, neither Jasper or Edward said much, but it wasn't uncomfortable. After they finished and cleared their table, they agreed to split up for awhile and meet back up at the bookstore in two hours. Edward figured that'd give him enough time to figure out and get Jasper's gift.

Jewelry seemed clichéd and clothes were impersonal. Jasper's only hobbies, as far as Edward knew, were reading, listening to music, and playing the guitar. He sighed as he walked; he sucked. He knew he shouldn't have waited so long, but he'd been thinking about it for _weeks_ and had yet to come up with anything. It wasn't because he didn't know Jasper; he had a feeling it was more because he knew that Jasper wasn't expecting anything, and lived a very simple life without the need for clutter that useless gifts brought along. The only thing he knew Jasper wanted was a weekend away.

He knew Jasper wouldn't appreciate it if he planned an extensive weekend getaway for them someplace special as a Christmas gift when they'd already talked about going away together, so he put that idea on the back burner for another time with a sigh. He found a bench and sat, resting his forehead on the handle of his cane as he thought. He'd toyed with the idea of making something, but the only talent he had was for music, and he didn't have enough confidence to attempt to make a recording, especially on short notice.

Edward sighed again and ran his fingers through his hair, groaning as his phone rang. He checked the I.D. before he answered. "Yes, Alice?"

"Are you freaking out yet, cousin?" She asked, seeming overly chipper.

"Yes, thanks," Edward answered dryly. He leaned back against the bench and tipped his head back so he was looking up at the ceiling, eyes closed. "Help?" he asked softly.

"Oh, Edward," Alice sighed. "Go to the art gallery at the end of the mall, lower level. Take your time; you'll know it when you see them."

"Thanks, Alice," Edward answered and disconnected the call after Alice hung up. He rose and headed toward the gallery, texting Jasper that he might be later than he thought, knowing that he'd wait at the bookstore (or get lost looking through the stacks, same difference). The quiet of the art gallery was a welcome relief from the buzz of the mall, and Edward lingered for a moment in the lobby before entering the show room.

It didn't take him long to find what Alice had meant. He ordered one of each of four prints, disappointed that he was unable to purchase originals (at the moment), and paid to have them matted and framed in slim black frames that could be easily hanged in the dorms. The clerk was very helpful and double bagged the purchase so Jasper wouldn't be able to see them. Edward thanked her, and smiled as he passed a few of Alice's pieces on his way out, making a note to thank her, later. He lugged the bags back through the mall to the bookstore. It was awkward moving with everything, but he managed. In the back of his mind he noted that it was easier than it had been even only a month prior.

He found Jasper sitting in one of the chairs set up in a lounge area, sipping a cup of coffee as he flipped through a magazine. Bags lay under and around his outstretched legs.

Edward perched on the arm of his chair and kissed him lightly as his arm curled around Jasper's shoulders. "Hi."

"Hello," Jasper answered with a smile, leaning into him slightly. "Successful trip?"

"Yup," Edward replied. "You get everything?"

"I think so. I need to run to the hardware and grocery store, but I can do that tomorrow morning."

"What for?" Edward asked, frowning.

Jasper nudged him. "Spray paint, bamboo skewers, and a few six packs."

"What for?" Edward repeated.

"Not telling."

Edward rolled his eyes. "You're as bad as Alice and Emmett."

Jasper laughed. "I like giving surprises," he said with a shrug, wrapping his arm around Edward's waist. "And even though they're not for you, I'm still not telling."

Edward sighed, but smiled. "Fine then. Are you ready to go?"

"Mm-hm," Jasper answered. "But let's see if we can consolidate some of these bags, first." They spent a few minutes shuffling things around, careful not to let each other peek inside the bags and eventually got the two piles into something more manageable.

Jasper carried the bulk of the packages over Edward's protests. It was late afternoon by the time they left, and the sky had begun to darken with both clouds and the disappearing sun. Fortunately, the rain held off until they were in the car and on their way back to Forks. They decided not to stop for dinner on their way home after checking in with Esme. She said she was just preparing leftovers to clean out the fridge before she went shopping for another big family meal in the morning.

Once they were home and wrestled their packages upstairs (seeing that Alice had already dumped piles of wrapping paper, gift bags, bows and tissue paper on the bed), they joined everyone in the kitchen and played dominoes and snacked on the various odds and ends they'd brought back from the dorms and Esme pulled from the fridge and cupboard.

Esme and the girls retired earlier than the men, citing their need to get to the grocery store plenty early on Christmas Eve to get everything they'd need to fix both large meals so they could be home before Alice's parents arrived, sometime around noon. For Christmas Eve, Esme always prepared a large roast, with mashed potatoes and creamed spinach and homemade rolls which they ate before going to church. Since the family had expanded, they'd started taking shifts to add stocking stuffers and gifts from "Santa" under the tree, and everyone had to swear that they'd not peek in their stockings while stuffing everyone else's.

After the girls went to bed, Jasper asked if he could borrow Carlisle's study to wrap gifts, and Edward went to his room to start wrapping his. They had already split up the stuff for the kids at the hospital, so Edward wrapped his half and clearly labeled them boy or girl (though he wasn't one really for gender stereotypes, they'd found in the past that some parents hadn't been thrilled when their little girl got a G.I. Joe set instead of a doll), and had a few that would work for either. He took his time wrapping everything up for his family, sticking a few things under the bed for Christmas morning.

Jasper came back up just as he was finishing and helped him carry all the packages down to the tree, which was already overflowing with gifts. Though there was no official rule for the family Christmas, he knew they all tried to not go overboard, because though the gifts were nice, it wasn't really what they holiday was about. But with eight of them, soon to be ten when Alice's parents arrived, that still left a lot of things under the tree.

They joined Emmett and Carlisle in the living room in front of the fire, sipping from what looked to be Carlisle's scotch. Emmett was re-righting the couch from where he'd tipped it back.

"I'm going to do it Christmas morning. I've got it all planned out," Emmett was saying as Edward poured them each two fingers worth of scotch and they settled together in one of the arm chairs.

"Does your mother know?" Carlisle asked.

Emmett shook his head, smiling brightly. "Nope. I want it to be a surprise for her, too."

"Does _her_ family know?" Edward asked.

"I asked her dad for his blessing and he gave it," Emmett said proudly. "But I asked him not to tell her mom, so it can be a surprise when we get there after New Year's."

"If Rose doesn't call her immediately after it happens," Jasper added.

"Well, yeah," Emmett said, Jasper's doubt not dampening his enthusiasm.

"I'm happy for you, Son," Carlisle said after he finished his drink. He rose and clapped Emmett on the shoulder. "You'll be very happy together." He squeezed Emmett's shoulder and made his goodnights before carrying his glass into the kitchen and vanishing down the hall.

"So, what about you two? Plans?" Emmett asked, splashing a little more drink into his glass.

"We're going to try to get away for a weekend after the holidays," Edward answered. "I was thinking maybe San Francisco would be nice for a weekend."

Jasper hummed his agreement. "Haven't been before, but I'd like to."

"We'll have to see what we can find," Edward said, finishing his drink and settling back against Jasper's chest. He smiled softly as he felt Jasper's fingers slip under the hem of his shirt and stroke lightly over his belly. They chatted for a while longer until Jasper's touches grew bolder in the dark room, lit only by the fire and the lights from the Christmas tree. The touch of his lips against Edward's neck made it difficult for him to focus on his conversation with Emmett, and it wasn't long before Edward was excusing them and dragging Jasper upstairs, Emmett's laughter following them.

Edward remembered to lock the door behind them, and Jasper surprised him by pushing up against it and kissing him deeply. He let his cane fall to the floor as he grasped at Jasper's waist with one hand. Edward's other hand slid up Jasper's clothed chest and rested over his heart as Edward returned the kiss. He was already half hard from Jasper's teasing touches downstairs, and Jasper seemed determined to see that situation resolved.

Jasper tugged at the hems of Edward's tops and he lifted his arms to allow Jasper to pull them off. They fell to the floor quietly and Jasper shifted his attention from Edward's mouth to the rest of his body. Jasper's lips followed his fingers over Edward's chest and torso. Though he wasn't as reactive as Jasper, his partner took time to coax Edward's every last bit of arousal and pleasure from Edward's body. He used his fingers and mouth to elicit a reaction from Edward's nipples, which, when his patience finally paid off, went straight to Edward's cock. He bucked helplessly against Jasper's thigh, all but pinned against the door while Jasper showered him with physical affection.

Jasper went down on one knee and reached for the belt buckle on Edward's jeans, looking up at Edward with a devious smile on his face as he took his time to work the leather out of the clasp. Before he pulled the belt through the loops Jasper nuzzled Edward's obvious erection through his jeans, blowing hot air over his swollen cock, causing Edward to groan, his right hand going out to sink into Jasper's unruly mop of hair while his left hand braced against the door.

Edward's pants were tugged down his hips slowly, Jasper's fingers burning trails down Edward's thighs. Jasper licked his lips at winked up at Edward and in one smooth motion, pulled Edward's boxers down and took Edward into his mouth.

"Oh, fuck," Edward moaned, his heading hitting the door with a thud as his right hand fisted in Jasper's hair.

He whimpered as the moist warmth around his cock disappeared. "We'll get to that," Jasper promised, his voice gone husky. "But I want to do this, first," he said, bringing his other knee down to the floor and sliding his hands up Edward's thighs once more as he more slowly swallowed Edward down.

Edward forced himself not to push his hips forward until he got some sign form Jasper that it was alright. He moaned and whimpered as Jasper began to use his tongue and a very light scraping of teeth over him to drive Edward not-so-slowly crazy. While Jasper's mouth was busy, his fingers were not idle as they continued to roam, his thumbs rubbing small circles into his hips, or drifting behind his thighs to gasp his ass and pull him up tighter, or stroking his sack.

Edward quickly fell into a haze of lust and sensation; Jasper's eyes remained open and Edward stared into the hazy blue as Jasper looked up at him. A gentle slide of Jasper's hand against his hip gave all the encouragement Edward needed and he let go of his control and gave over to the sensation, and came with a quiet cry, glad he'd braced himself against the door and Jasper's shoulder as his knees went week as Jasper convulsively swallowed, continuing to suck with increasing gentleness, using his tongue and lips to clean Edward off before he fell back on his haunches, staring up at Edward like the cat that got the canary.

"How come I always end up naked before you?" Edward asked when he'd recovered his breath.

Jasper got to his feet with a cheeky smile. "I've told you; you look better naked than I do."

Edward grabbed his shirt and tugged him forward, kissing him passionately. He felt Jasper's erection at his hip and he ground against him lightly. "You said you were going to fuck me," he growled into Jasper's ear, taking the lobe between his teeth and biting lightly.

"Patience, lover," Jasper teased, scraping his teeth along Edward's jugular.

Edward didn't think he had much patience left; he'd been waiting for a month to be more physically intimate with Jasper and he wasn't going to let the opportunity go. "Jasper," he all but whined.

Jasper laughed quietly and kissed him softly. Edward wanted none of that. He all but ripped Jasper's shirt off as he kissed him back with a bit more force; he didn't hear Jasper complaining. He pushed off the door and started walking toward the bed, slowly, so Jasper wouldn't fall over anything and hut himself again. He stepped out of his jeans and boxers as he moved, throwing Jasper's shirt over his shoulder when they got it off and tackling the button fly of Jasper's jeans as they walked and kissed.

By the time they reached the bed, Edward had succeeded in getting Jasper's jeans open and palmed his cock through his underwear. Jasper let out a slow breath through his teeth. "If you want me to fuck you," he said lowly. "You either need to stop that, or finish," he warned. Color was high in his cheeks and his mouth was red from the kissing and having Edward's cock in his mouth. He looked gorgeous.

"Hm, decisions, decisions," Edward teased. "Strip," he said quietly, kissing Jasper once more before limping to his bureau and digging for the lube and condoms that he'd stashed there before Thanksgiving.

Jasper kicked off his pants and underwear as Edward returned to the bed. "Allow me," Edward said lowly, letting a bit of lube warm in his palm before he wrapped his hand around Jasper's length and stroked.

Jasper all but purred low in his throat and Edward took that as a good sign. He used his free hand to flick over Jasper's nipples, listening to his lover's breath catch in his throat and whimper quietly at a combination pinch and stroke. Edward saw Jasper tense and he kissed him as Jasper came over his hand, semen staining both of their chests. Jasper broke the kiss, his chest heaving, and rested his forehead on Edward's shoulder. Edward stroked his hair for a moment, and then guided him onto the bed, curling up next to him.

They cuddled together, exchanging light touches and tender kisses. After awhile, the touches turned more teasing and arousing, the kisses more intense, and they began round two.

Edward was half hard when Jasper urged him onto his stomach. His hands worked in long sweeping strokes over Edward's back, relaxing him before he went for the lube. Jasper was nothing if not attentive, whispering promises and assurances in Edward's ears, dropping kisses along his spine as he started to prep Edward. Jasper's left hand was warm at the base of Edward's spine as a slick finger circled him before pressing in.

"Relax, baby," Jasper murmured. "I'm gonna make you feel really good, soon," he assured Edward. "I love you, I'm not going to hurt you."

"I know," Edward breathed. "It's just been awhile."

"I'll take very good care of you." Jasper kissed him between his shoulder blades.

Edward felt his body relax a fraction more and Jasper continued to prep him, adding a second finger and allowing Edward's body to respond. Jasper's other hand left Edward's body and he craned his neck as he heard the sound of flesh on flesh to see Jasper stroking himself a few times while he relaxed Edward. "Beautiful," Edward whispered and Jasper flushed.

Jasper rose up on his knees and kissed Edward, lingering for a moment as his fingers slipped free, leaving Edward feeling momentarily empty and bereft. Jasper's hands ran up and down Edward's spine a few more times.

"Turn over," Jasper urged him quietly, slowing his hands to a stop on Edward's hips.

Edward turned onto his back and Jasper reached for a condom and more lube. Jasper stroked Edward's cock a few times as he rose up and kissed him again and again. When Jasper sat back and ripped open the condom, Edward bent his knees and placed his feet on the bed. He watched with heavy lidded eyes as Jasper rolled the condom down his length and lubed himself up, then smeared more lube over Edward.

"I love you," Jasper said as he picked up Edward's ankles, kissing the inside of each as he placed them over his shoulders.

"Love you too," Edward said.

Jasper shifted once, and then Edward felt him pressed against his anus. "Breathe, baby," Jasper said quietly and he slowly pressed forward as Edward remembered to take a breath, and let it out slowly. He was being stretched and filled by inches as Jasper slowly and carefully penetrated and withdrew, and suddenly he was plugged in to Jasper in a way he'd never thought possible.

"Oh, fuck," Jasper said lowly, hands gripping Edward's hips as he stopped, buried inside Edward. They were both breathing heavily, and Edward focused on simply feeling. He felt Jasper rock his hips and gasped at the sensation, his eyes closing as he felt something spark between them.

Jasper slowly began to withdraw, then push back in slowly. Each motion was accompanied by some other touch on Jasper's part, a caress of Edward's face, a kiss to the calf propped on Jasper's shoulder, anything that showed Edward how much of the action was about him, not just Jasper's needs or wants.

As they got more comfortable, Jasper settled into an easy, languid rhythm. On his downward thrusts he'd lean in close to Edward for a kiss or a nuzzle, his hands wandering over Edward's chest, the occasional stroke over Edward's cock.

When he came down close to Edward's face again, Edward wrapped his hands lightly behind Jasper's head and held him in place for a longer, deeper kiss. His thighs were beginning to ache from the position he was holding and when he broke the kiss, he slid his legs down Jasper's body, planting his feet flat on the bed, giving him a bit of leverage to meet each of Jasper's strokes.

"Touch yourself, Edward," Jasper requested. He was flushed pink, his eyes bright and lips dark and he'd never looked more gorgeous to Edward.

Edward complied, fumbling for the lube Jasper had dropped onto the mattress, then matching his strokes to the new rhythm Jasper established. With his new freedom of movement, Edward shifted his pelvis and was rewarded by a bright strike of pleasure as Jasper's thrust scraped against his prostate, sending a jolt through him straight to his cock.

Jasper continued to tease Edward with other touches as he moved inside him, the burn of his stubble over Edward's skin sending a new wave of sensation over him. The combination of being stroked and penetrated rapidly grew toward overstimulation and he felt his body tense. "Jas, baby," he warned his head falling back into the mattress as Jasper struck his prostate again and again in quick succession and he stroked himself as he came, prolonging his orgasm as he sobbed softly in his release.

He was tenderly kissed before Jasper went still above him, and Edward opened his eyes long enough to watch Jasper's face as he reached his peak and fell over the other side, Edward's name just a ghost of breath on his lips.

Edward's arms wrapped around Jasper when he settled on top of Edward, their chests pressed tightly together. On hand simply rested at the base of Jasper's spine, the other carded through the damp hair at the base of his neck as they both recovered their breath and just laid together.

Jasper lifted his head and lightly rested his chin on Edward's chest. "Love you," Jasper said, after a few moments, kissing him tenderly. "Love you love you love you," he repeated, dropping kisses over Edward's shoulders and chest. They stayed that way for awhile, until the sweat on their skin began to cool. Edward felt an acute loss as Jasper slipped out of him and left the bed to dispose of the condom and brought back a towel to clean them both up.

Edward, feeling well fucked and completely loved, curled himself around Jasper after he slid back into the bed, and they held each other, laughing softly as they kept shifting to get comfortable in the rumpled linens, murmuring quiet words as they began to drift off.

Edward woke Wednesday morning, naked and wrapped around Jasper, and he didn't think he could have been more content. He heard movement downstairs and figured it wouldn't be long before anyone came looking for them. Edward set about kissing Jasper awake. It didn't take long.

"Mm, I kinda like gettin' woke up that way," Jasper said with a sleepy smile.

"I think this was the part of the break I was looking forward to the most," Edward admitted, snuggling back down into the nest of blankets they'd gotten tangled in.

Jasper hummed his agreement and looked like he was going to drift back off but a knock and Bella's voice came through the door. "Breakfast's ready," she called softly. "Don't be too long or it'll get cold."

"We'll be right down," Edward called back, then sighed as he heard her footsteps retreat. "They're not going to let us sleep in today."

"Apparently not." Jasper punctuated his statement with a kiss on Edward's lips and they slowly shifted apart, untangling bed linens and limbs until they were able to rise, ran quickly through a shower (together, to save water and time of course), tug on clothes, and take whatever drugs they needed in the morning.

When they reached the dining room, Esme was just setting out breakfast. Edward shot Bella a look.

"What?" She asked cheekily. "It got you down here, didn't it?"

Edward rolled his eyes and kissed her cheek before he took his seat. "What's for breakfast?"

"In honor of Jasper's southern roots, we're having biscuits and sausage gravy, though there's also eggs," Esme said as she placed a large bowl of biscuits on the table alongside a huge skillet of gravy and a fruit salad, next to a bowl of scrambled eggs.

Jasper hugged Esme tightly, completely dwarfing her. Edward couldn't hear the words exchanged, but Jasper kissed Esme's cheek and he had a slightly faraway look in his eyes when he took his seat next to Edward. Edward took his hand under the table and Jasper squeezed back, but didn't say anything.

After breakfast, the guys cleaned up while the girls headed out to do the shopping. Jasper remained quiet and somewhat withdrawn, but he'd warned Edward that Christmas was hard for him and it was the morning of Christmas Eve. Edward chose to not press Jasper on anything and simply stayed close, offering light touches when he could, finding ways to silently remind his lover that he wasn't alone. If nothing else, it made Jasper look at him, so Edward figured he was doing something right.

They finished cleaning up and Jasper quietly asked Edward if he wanted to run a few errands. Edward agreed, and he set out for the hardware store.

"I know the next few days are rough for you," Edward said quietly, taking his eyes off the road for just a moment to glance at Jasper. "If you want to talk about anything, you can, you know." He smiled softly. "I love you."

Jasper nodded. "I know. I love you, too." He let out a long slow breath. "Can you just…stick by me today?" he asked in a small voice.

Edward took his hand and gave it a squeeze. "Whatever you need, Jasper."

Jasper responded by leaning over and kissing Edward quickly, then sitting back and falling quiet for the rest of the short drive.

At the hardware store, Jasper found bamboo skewers and cans of red, purple, and yellow spray paint, as well as a roll of green electrical tape. They walked down the street to the convenience store and Jasper bought several six packs of pop and beer. When they got back to the house, Jasper went out to the back patio and Edward followed, curious, as Jasper set everything down and went back inside for a pair of scissors.

Edward settled on one of the lounges and watched as Jasper sat on the ground with his supplies laid out in front of him. Jasper removed the plastic rings from the pop and beer and cut them into rounds, discarding the scraps. He folded them, and speared them on the bamboo skewers. Soon, he had a small bunch of what looked like hyacinth made from plastic. Edward watched, amazed, as he carefully spray painted them with the colors he'd bought and set them aside while he cleaned up. When the paint had dried, he used the green tape to mask the skewers so they looked like stems, and sat back, looking pleased at his handiwork.

Edward held his tongue on his very obvious question and merely opened his arms when Jasper stood and crossed to him, inviting him to sit, after he'd hidden his flowers out of sight. Jasper lowered himself down and Edward folded his arms around him, resting his cheek against Jasper's. It was cold, but their shared body heat was enough. Edward hummed quietly, various jazzy Christmas tunes as they just sat together. Jasper eventually relaxed and Edward was reminded of Thanksgiving, only he felt like there was little chance of Jasper opening up to him.

Edward glanced over at the kitchen doors when he saw the lights come on. His mother was standing at the door, her hand on the handle, a questioning look in her eyes. Edward shook his head minutely, hoping he read her question right and letting her know that it wasn't a good time but they didn't need anything. She nodded, a sad smile on her face, as she turned away.

Jasper's hands covered Edward's on his stomach, but he remained silent as Edward split his attention between his lover and the women moving around the kitchen in his peripheral vision. More than once Bella lingered at the doors watching them, until Alice or Esme pulled her away to help with something. Eventually, their body heat wasn't enough for Edward and he nudged Jasper lightly while kissing the pulse point in his neck. "I think it's time to go inside," he said quietly. "I'm cold, so I know you have to be."

Jasper nodded. "Thanks for sitting with me." His voice was tired and hoarse.

"I'll do anything to make you feel better," Edward said quietly. "Anything, Jasper, I mean that," he said earnestly. "I know I, we," he said with a wave of his hand indicating the house and his family "won't replace your family. We won't try, but I know that's not the problem. There's no reason you can't start to make new memories and have a family again. You shouldn't feel guilty for moving on, baby." Edward kissed Jasper's jaw. "I love you," he whispered.

Jasper squeezed his hands again. "I love you too," he whispered. "I – I think I want to stay out here a bit longer."

Edward nodded and after Jasper shifted forward, he slid off the chair onto his feet. He bent and kissed Jasper properly. "Don't stay out here too long," he said. "Esme will worry, and Alice's parents will be here soon."

"Okay."

Edward kissed him again and returned to the house. He accepted the hug from his mom as he joined the ladies in the kitchen, and Rosalie handed him a cup of coffee with a sad smile. "It's hard for him, isn't it?" she asked.

Edward nodded and leaned against the counter. He wouldn't linger long, not wanting Jasper to feel like he was being watched. "I think he feels guilty for moving on. His family was small and they were close. I can't imagine being alone this time of year, and he has been for a long time."

Rosalie gave him a brief hug and kissed his forehead. "Just be there for him, Edward."

He smiled and returned the hug. "Thanks, Rose." She nodded and returned to what she was doing when Bella came up to him.

"Can I help?" she asked softly, wringing her hands a bit.

Edward nodded and drew her into a hug. "Would you sit with him for a bit?" he asked softly. "I think you may be able to empathize better than any of us with what he's going through." Bella had been without a family of her own for nearly as long as Jasper, and if anyone could understand at least most of what he was going through, it would be her.

She hugged him back and nodded against his chest. "I'll try."

He kissed the top of her head. "Take a blanket. It's getting cold." The sky was clear and brilliant blue, which made it even colder outside.

"Okay." She smiled and hugged him before stepping away.

Edward cast one last glance out the glass doors and saw Jasper as he'd left him, staring out over the yard. With great reluctance, he made himself walk through to the living room and join Emmett, who was playing video games.

"Here, bro," Emmett said, tossing him a controller.

Edward set his coffee down and accepted the controller, loving that his brother always seemed to know what would distract Edward, and not making a fuss about it. He easily lost track of time as they played, glancing up when a dark haired blur ran in front of the TV on the way to the door.

"Mom, Daddy!" Alice called as she flung the door open.

Emmett paused the game as Rose, Esme, and Carlisle poured into the living room from the kitchen and wherever Carlisle had been hiding.

"Em!" Esme called, rushing to hug her sister, then her brother in law. "How was your flight?"

"Long, but pleasant," Edward's aunt Emma answered, stripping out of her scarf and hat as her husband David did the same. Emma looked quite a bit like Esme, average height and a figure that had filled out slightly in middle age, but she was still fairly thin. David was a tall, skinny, bespectacled man with dark hair and bright blue eyes. "It's good to see you, Es." She hung her coat and everything on the close to overflowing rack and embraced Alice, who had all but jumped on her father.

Hugs and greetings were quickly passed around and Emmett was enlisted to take his aunt and uncle's bags up to the guest room while Emma disappeared back into the kitchen with the girls and David accepted Carlisle's offer of a quiet drink. Left to his own devices once more, Edward wandered through the kitchen, blocking out the noise of the ladies talking as they cooked, and watched Jasper and Bella.

Jasper had Bella cradled between his outstretched legs, a quilt wrapped mostly around Bella as she leaned back against his chest. From the distance, Edward couldn't tell if any of the light had come back into Jasper's eyes, but it looked like they were speaking, and Jasper didn't seem as closed off. As much as he wished he was the one out there (and had to admit he was a bit jealous), he knew that Bella was probably the best person for Jasper to talk to.

"And who is that out there with Bella that's got Edward so enraptured?" his aunt asked at his shoulder, a cup of coffee in her hands.

"Jasper," Edward answered, glancing sidelong at Emma. "My par-boyfriend." The correction was hesitant. Though he thought of Jasper as his partner in his head, he was reluctant to voice the thought out loud. He knew in his heart that Jasper was who he was meant to be with, but his head argued that it was too soon to know for sure.

"He's quite lovely, Edward," Emma observed. "Does he teach?"

Edward nodded. "History. He just joined the faculty this semester. We're hoping they'll offer him a permanent position, now that there's an opening."

"You'll have to introduce me when they come back inside," she said cheerfully.

Edward smiled. His aunt was no less a matchmaker than the other women in his life. She was also an incredible flirt. "I will, but you have to remember he's taken," he reminded her, teasing.

Emma chuckled. "Not to fear, young man. I'm not quite ready to take on that 'cougar' label so soon. Oh, your mother asked if you'd bring Bella back inside to start working on some of the pies for tomorrow. And I want to say hello."

Edward laughed and nodded. "Yes, ma'am."

"Good boy." She patted his cheek and returned to where Rose and Esme were cooking and Alice was supervising.

Edward stepped out onto the patio, noting that it had gotten colder since he'd come inside. Bella's nose was pink, as were Jasper's cheeks and nose. But when Jasper looked up at Edward's footsteps he could see a lightness that had been missing that morning and Edward heaved an internal sigh of relief.

"Aunt Emma and Uncle David are here," Edward said by way of greeting. "And I don't know how you're not a Jasper-sicle by now," he teased lightly. "Bella, mom wanted to see if you were ready to start making pies, and I need to pour some hot coffee into Jasper by the look of things."

Bella nodded and moved to stand, but Jasper apparently held her firm for a moment. "Thanks, Darlin'," Jasper said quietly, kissing her cheek.

Bella turned and kissed his forehead. "It gets easier, Jas. I promise." She hugged him tightly, then shifted off the lounge, taking the blanket with her as she traipsed into the house, her giggles trailing as she tripped over the edge of the blanket but caught herself before she fell.

Jasper rose and reached for Edward's hand, pulling him into a tight hug that Edward wouldn't have fought for anything. He lingered in Jasper's embrace for a long moment, soaking up the scent and feel of him, memories of the previous evening surfacing at the emotions written on Jasper's features and in his actions. "Thank you. Thank you for loving me, and for sharing your family with me. Thank you for sending Bella out to talk to me. Thank you for not hovering," he whispered in Edward's ear, his warm breath contrasting with the chill in the air making Edward shiver. "Thank you for understanding."

Edward responded by kissing him softly, sweetly, not caring that every woman in his life was probably staring from the kitchen doors. "I love you," was the only answer he felt was appropriate. "But it's fucking freezing out here."

Jasper laughed and Edward smiled, feeling some of his worry evaporate as a bit of his lover was returned to him. Edward tugged himself out of Jasper's embrace and led him toward the house.

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So, a bit of something for everyone, no? ^_^


	27. Chapter 26: I'll Be Home for Christmas

Readers, y'all are fantastic. I know there are some reviews I haven't replied to yet, and I'll try to get to that as soon as I can.

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Jasper stared off into space after Edward left him on the patio. He hadn't expected his mood to come crashing down as hard as it had that morning at breakfast. The previous evening had been…beyond description. He and Edward had finally had a chance to be completely intimate with each other, and Jasper had slept knowing that he was unconditionally loved and it was enough to almost make him forget that the next day was Christmas Eve.

But then Esme had made biscuits and gravy for breakfast, and he'd nearly lost it there in the dining room for a moment. He'd felt himself shutting down, memories warring with each other. From there things had started to kind of spiral downwards, and by the time he had finished making the fake flowers as part of Esme's Christmas gift, he'd felt like he was drowning in a sea of memories and guilt. Edward had held him and tried to reassure him that it was alright for him to move on, but no matter how much Jasper found himself wanting to believe that, he couldn't. It was part of why he had avoided holidays for the past decade or so.

"Can I sit with you, Jas?" Bella asked softly, jarring him from his thoughts. She was bundled in a quilt and clutched a mug in her hands.

"I'm not the best company, Darlin'," he responded, but opened his arms. "But if you want."

"I do," she said with a smile, and joined him, snuggling up so she was sitting against his chest. She rested her head against his collarbone and he rested his cheek against the top of her head, swallowing a sigh.

They were quiet for awhile. The whole world seemed silent. Jasper felt like he was in a bubble, despite the rest of the Cullen family being less than fifty feet away beyond glass doors. Bella just sat with him, sipping from her mug of warm spiced cider.

"How long have you been alone, Jas?" Bella asked softly, her sweet voice breaking the silence.

"Almost eleven years," he answered after a beat.

"Me too," she mused.

"How do you do it?" he whispered.

"Do what?" Bella asked, eyes wide and brow furrowed in confusion.

"Move on. Be a part of this family," he explained quietly.

Bella smiled sadly and set her mug on the ground, shifting so she could take his hands. "I was devastated when Renee died. I had only been with Charlie for a few months and we barely knew each other, not to mention my opinion about living on the reservation and the total lack of privacy. Charlie and I barely spoke; it wasn't really in either of our natures to share much, and outside of school, I didn't have much of a life. But Renee's death, especially as sudden as it was, forced me to reconsider my relationship with Charlie and we started spending more time together." She paused and smiled slightly, probably sifting through some of those memories.

"I had Charlie to myself for two years before I went off to school, and we made sure to make it all worth it. He loved to fish, for the solitude it allowed him to think and to be able to lose himself in nature. He was also best friends with two of the tribal elders and they were like brothers. Charlie had a fierce passion for upholding the law, but he was known to let things slide, depending on the offense and the reason. He was a lot deeper than Renee had ever led me to believe, and more than I'd ever realized on our short two week holidays over the years.

"He was my dad, and I always loved him, but by the time I left for university, I really felt like he was my father," she explained. "When I got the call just a month into the semester, I was floored. I'd talked to him only a couple days before. Someone had gotten drunk on the res, and started beating on his wife. Charlie took the call, and he tried to talk the guy down before the deputies arrived to help him out. He was shot with a shotgun at close range." Her voice fell slightly flat, and Jasper let go of her hand to wipe away the tear that had spilled from her eye. She gave him a watery smile. "I was alone, just turned nineteen, and living in the dorms in Seattle. I had always been pretty independent, but I had to grow up, fast. I was lucky enough to have a great roommate and a network of friends that I'd managed to put together in the first month of school, not to mention the entire reservation looking out for me."

She took Jasper's hand again and frowned, rubbing his fingers between hers. "I moved on, because I know Charlie wouldn't have wanted me to stop living my life," she said gently. "He made sure I was taken care of financially, and my friends made sure I was taken care of emotionally. That first Thanksgiving and Christmas was hard, but my roommate dragged my pathetic ass home with her and forced me to eat turkey and buy a Christmas tree, and on Christmas made me go shopping and sing carols and go to church. The guys from the res called regularly, and I eventually was able to look back on my life with Charlie and Renee with fondness at the memories and start working some of their traditions into my own life, and my friends'. When I moved here and Esme got a hold of me, it wasn't much different from those years in Seattle. I just had a new set of friends, and a mom for the first time in ten years."

Bella paused, probably to let Jasper absorb everything she said before she spoke again. "Why can't you, Jasper? What's got you hiding out here withdrawn into yourself instead inside with everyone who cares about you?"

Jasper sighed softly before speaking. "I was discharged from the Marine's six months after my mama passed away; breast cancer," he said. "I had been set up by a member of my unit, and when I got home, I had no family, no friends, and I couldn't trust anyone enough not to betray me to make any new friends. Not true friends, anyway. I had study buddies in school, and I tried to date once, but my faith in people had been so completely broken by Darryl and Ma-my discharge that I couldn't trust anyone," he said quietly. "I just spent so much time alone that on the holidays I could hide from the world, pretend it was just another day, and be alone with my memories.

"And now…" he said taking another slow breath. "I've found friends, real friends who don't want anything from me other than my company, a partner who is so much better than I deserve, and a woman who welcomed me into her family like a long lost son, and all I can do is feel like I'm betraying the memory of my family because I'm so close to being happy." He was also really fucking scared he was going to lose them all, and be alone all over again.

"Oh, sweetheart," Bella said softly. She shifted and wrapped her arms around his waist. "Don't you think they'd want for you to be happy?"

"Yes," he agreed. "But…"

"No buts, Jazzy," Bella said, cutting him off. "Your parents loved you, I have no doubt about that. They would only have wanted you to be happy. You're not replacing them, sweetheart. You'll always have those memories. Now you just get to make new ones. You said Esme has welcomed you into the family, and I know she has. If there's something you'd like to do, something from your family, all you have to do is mention it, and she'd find a way to make it work."

Jasper shook his head. "She's done so much already."

"Don't make me Emmett-smack you, Jasper Whitlock," Bella threatened. "You know it makes her happy to do whatever she can for any of us."

He managed a smile at her threat and nodded. "I know…"

Bella squeezed him again. "You're a lot like me. You don't like people to go out of their way or make a big fuss. But sometimes, Jas, you just have to let people take care of you."

"I know," he said again on a sigh.

Bella rested her head back on his chest. "It's not easy, especially when you're used to being more or less on your own, and I know that. But none of them, us, are trying to make you forget your family, Jasper. We'd never ask that of you. We care about you, sweetheart and we hate seeing you miserable like this. You've trusted us with your friendship this far, and you've trusted Edward with your heart. Can you start to trust that we're not going to do anything to hurt you?"

"I can try," he whispered.

Bella smiled softly. "It's a start."

Before he could respond again, he heard footsteps and looked up to greet Edward with a small smile.

"Aunt Emma and Uncle David are here," Edward said, looking considerably less haunted than he had when Jasper had asked him to give him some time alone. "And I don't know how you're not a Jasper-sicle by now," he teased. "Bella, mom wanted to see if you were ready to start making pies, and I need to pour some hot coffee into Jasper by the look of things."

He hadn't realized how cold it had gotten. Jasper held Bella firm for a moment when she started to rise. "Thanks, Darlin'," Jasper said quietly, kissing her cheek.

Bella turned and kissed his forehead. "It gets easier, Jas. I promise." She hugged him tightly and returned to the house, nearly tripping over the tail of the quilt that was wrapped around her body.

Jasper rose and reached for Edward's hand, pulling him into a tight hug. He needed to feel his lover against him, and he knew they could both use the physical reassurance that they were going to be alright. He felt Edward sigh softly against him and he just held him tightly for a moment before he spoke. "Thank you. Thank you for loving me, and for sharing your family with me. Thank you for sending Bella out to talk to me. Thank you for not hovering," he whispered in Edward's ear, his warm breath puffing out in a cloud near Edward's face. "Thank you for understanding."

Edward responded by kissing him sweetly. "I love you," Edward said softly. "But it's fucking freezing out here."

Jasper laughed lightly, thankful that he had friends willing to put up with him and help pull him back from the brink. Edward stepped out of the embrace and led him back toward the house.

As soon as they hit the warm air of the kitchen, Jasper started sniffling, his nose starting to run. He accepted the cup of coffee that Bella handed him with a small smile. The warm cup stung his hands.

"Can the introductions wait?" He asked Edward quietly, nodding toward the new woman in the kitchen he assumed to be Alice's mother. He rubbed at his nose with the back of his hand. "I think I need a shower to get warmed up," he said sheepishly. He knew he'd stayed outside too long, but he just hadn't been able to make himself go back inside while he was in that mood.

Edward nodded. "Yes, please. I like you better when you're not blue at the edges," he said lightly.

Jasper kissed him softly and headed for the stairs to Edward's – their - room. He went straight for the bathroom and got the water running in the shower before he stripped out of his clothes. He hadn't noted how they'd grown damp before Bella'd joined him, which was probably why he hadn't really warmed up after she brought the quilt out with her.

The steam from the hot shower made his nose run more freely, but the hot water warmed him up quickly and helped to once again loosen the muscles in his back which had tightened again in the awkward position of the lounge and the cold. Jasper scrubbed his hair clean for the second time that day and lingered as long as he could under the spray until the chill that wasn't wholly from the weather was chased from his bones.

Jasper dressed in a nice pair of jeans, a long-sleeved t-shirt and a knit sweater from Edward's closet. He tugged on a clean pair of heavy socks and used the towel to scrub his hair dry, letting the waves fall where they may. Still sniffling a little, he found one of the handkerchiefs he'd bought on one of the shopping trips with Alice and shoved it into his pocket.

Though he'd spent enough time being anti-social for the morning, he took a few more moments to steel himself. Edward and Bella's words rang in his ears and he so desperately wanted to just let go and move on, to start creating new memories and not be haunted by his past. He knew his parents wouldn't have wanted him to live out the rest of his life in a miserable solitary existence, but it felt like a betrayal to so easily fall into the Cullen family, even after a decade without his family. Even so, he also knew that he had a cause for his mood, and he should be able to push it aside for the time being. He knew it wouldn't just go away, but he had a feeling that if he asked, Carlisle could refer him to a therapist he could talk to. If he ever wanted to believe he had a chance at a future with Edward, Jasper knew he needed to get some help for some of his trust issues.

Jasper scrubbed his hands through his hair once more and hung the towel in the bathroom before padding downstairs. He found Edward playing video games with Emmett and heard female voices in the kitchen. There was no sign of Carlisle or Alice's father, and Jasper figured Carlisle had pulled another one of his disappearing acts and taken his brother-in-law with him. It was probably a smart move.

Jasper settled on the couch next to Edward.

"Feeling better?" Edward spared him a glance from the television, concern in his eyes.

"Mostly," Jasper answered honestly. "I'm warmed up at least," he said.

"Good," Edward answered, leaning into him slightly.

Jasper watched them play, declining a turn when Emmett offered. He realized he'd left his coffee cup upstairs and was thinking about running up for it and getting a refill while he toyed with the hair at the base of Edward's skull, grinning when Edward swatted him away in irritation.

"Boys, do you need anything?" The unfamiliar woman who Jasper could only assume to be Mrs. Brandon entered from the kitchen.

"No thanks, Aunt Em," Emmett responded, never breaking eye contact with his game.

"Edward?" She asked.

"Hm? Oh," Edward grinned, pausing the game from his controller, earning a sigh from Emmett, who decided to take a break at that point and strolled into the kitchen. "Aunt Emma, this is Jasper Whitlock. Jasper, Alice's mom, Emma Brandon."

"Nice to meet you, ma'am," Jasper drawled, rising and extending his hand.

She shot a look at Edward and grinned at Jasper. "Well, I can see how you charmed everyone," she responded, taking his hand, but pulling him into a hug that he more than half expected. She was Esme's sister, after all. "And it's Emma, dear."

"Of course," Jasper said with a nod.

"So, Alice tells me you're originally from Texas and came to Washington via Colorado."

"Colorado via Ohio via Illinois," Jasper said with a grin. He glanced over his shoulder at Edward's chuckle. He rejoined Edward on the couch while Emma perched on the arms of one of the oversized chairs.

"And how are you liking Forks?" she asked.

"It's growing on me," he admitted. "It's a great community, and the school is fantastic. The faculty and staff have been very welcoming."

Emma laughed. "I'm sure they have been." She rose and patted his leg as she passed. "We'll chat some more, Jasper," she said with a wink, and Edward's laughter rumbled through Jasper as they sat close together.

"Like mother like daughter," Jasper observed as she went back into the kitchen and Edward laughed again.

"You have no idea," Edward said.

Alone for the moment, Jasper kissed Edward lightly. "I'm going to get my cup from upstairs and get more coffee. Do you want anything."

Edward shook his head. "I'm good." But before Jasper could step away, Edward tugged his hand lightly. He didn't say anything but smiled softly and Jasper nodded. He felt a bit lighter after talking to Bella, and it was making the day easier. Edward released his hand after a squeeze.

The ladies were in the process of chasing Emmett out of the kitchen as Jasper snuck in to refill his coffee. He got in and out quickly without being seen.

It was another couple of hours before the women emerged from the kitchen and Carlisle and David were pulled from the study. Everyone congregated in the living room over coffee, eggnog and Christmas cookies and caught up on what they'd been doing since they were last together. Jasper sat close to Edward and didn't volunteer much, but answered when questions were directed his way. When they started talking about holidays past and swapping stories around, Jasper took Edward's hand, but he didn't drift too far, especially when Bella squished herself into his other side after refilling the plate of Christmas cookies that Emmett had nearly single-handedly demolished.

After they chatted for awhile, Emma and Esme went back to the kitchen to finish getting dinner ready and the boys were called in to set the table. Emmett dragged the extra chairs up from the basement (Jasper was still on lifting restrictions) while Edward and Jasper spread the linens and used the china and silver that Esme had set out.

When everything was ready, Carlisle led them all in saying Grace. Jasper found the dinner conversation easier to partake in, though it may have been the red wine Esme served that helped with that. Food and conversation flowed smoothly and Jasper's worries were temporarily forgotten as he lost himself in the meal and company.

Carlisle and David offered to clean up while everyone else got ready for church. They'd be attending an early service of Midnight Mass at the Episcopal Church, Jasper learned. He was a bit anxious, not having stepped foot inside a chapel of any kind for ten years. Esme slipped two large turkeys into the oven before they left, to be made up into suppers for the families at the hospital on Christmas day.

Edward pulled Jasper aside while everyone was finishing up getting ready. Jasper had only to put on his shoes. "You don't have to come, if you're not comfortable."

"It's fine," Jasper said. "It's just been a really long time since I've been to church," he explained.

"Sit between Bella and I and follow my lead and you'll be fine," Edward assured him. "Bella still fumbles through, too, but no one really cares. You'll find that a lot of people at the service are kind of like us, Christmas and Easter parishioners." Edward smiled softly. "Though mom and dad go a bit more often, when they have the time."

Jasper nodded. "Okay."

"And then we get to come home and have dessert, and take turns putting out gifts, and pretend to be cooler than Emmett, who turns into a five-year old after dark on Christmas Eve," Edward said dryly.

Jasper laughed softly. He still had to put Edward's gift together; the box was in the pool shed, according to Esme, who had insisted on paying for half since it was such an expensive gift, and would be living at her house. He figured he'd get to it while everyone else was sneaking around acting like Santa.

Edward took his hand they joined Carlisle and Esme in the Mercedes while everyone else piled into the SUV that the Brandons had rented for their week-long stay. Edward didn't let go of Jasper's hand the whole drive, or when they arrived at the church, or when they took their seats toward the middle back of the sanctuary.

Bella sat on Jasper's other side, with Alice, Rose, and Emmett filling out their pew while the parents took the pew in front of them. Jasper's anxieties were soon eased as the Mass was filled with a lot of singing and traditional carols, and a nice sermon that was easy to follow. He and Edward held hands through most of the service, and he felt Bella's hand on his arm a few times as well. Jasper still didn't know what he'd done to deserve such loving people in life, but he didn't think he wanted to let them go any time soon.

They returned home to the smell of roasting turkeys and they all gathered in the dining room once more for dessert.

"Bella, what did you make for us this year?" Emma asked, carrying in the carafe of coffee behind Esme with plates and forks.

"I recently found an old recipe for banana pudding that I thought would be nice for tonight," she said, and Jasper caught the look in his direction and he smiled, feeling Edward's hand on the back of his neck, fingers stroking softly. Once again, someone had found a way to tie his past with his present and share something of his former life with this new family. "And there's also two kinds of brownies."

"Aw, Bells, you sure know how to take care of us," Emmett said, squeezing her into a tight hug and kissing the top of her head before she fled back into the kitchen to help bring out the desserts.

She returned a moment later carrying a huge bowl that looked a little like a square-ish brandy snifter, Emma and Esme behind her with plates of brownies.

Jasper smiled as Edward broke one of each of the brownies in half and slid them on to their plates. Even after months with the Cullens he didn't eat much for dessert. But he did take a healthy spoonful of the pudding Bella had made, and actually found himself going back for more of that while he fobbed the brownies off on Edward.

While they ate and sipped coffee, Esme handed out everyone's gifting assignments for the night. They each had twenty minutes beginning at eleven with Carlisle, who would be going on call for the hospital at five the next morning. In that time they were allowed to stuff stockings and put out anything from 'Santa' under the tree. When she warned about everyone being on the honor system to not peek, she looked directly at Emmett, who had the good sense to look a little flustered and duck his head, to everyone's amusement.

It was nearly eleven when they had the dishwasher loaded up and running again. Carlisle shooed everyone off before he disappeared into his office.

Jasper followed Edward upstairs and they quietly changed into pajamas and got ready for 'bed.' When Edward settled against the headboard, Jasper joined him, curling up into his side with his head on Edward's stomach, letting his defenses down. Edward quietly stroked his thumbs against Jasper's flank and after a few moments, Jasper began to speak quietly.

"This has to be the worst timing for this shit," he started off softly. "Holidays are supposed to be about family and love, not for taking care of your emotional wreck of a boyfriend."

Edward made a noise behind him, but Jasper didn't look up, continuing to focus on the pattern of the duvet and how it warped over the rise of Edward's feet.

"I was nervous about staying here for the whole break, but you already knew that," Jasper began again. "I'm scared, sometimes, Edward, about how fast everything seems to have happened," he confessed in a whisper. "I've kept myself away from people for so long, and I've been here for four months and your mother treats me like a member of the family, Emmett's turned into my best friend, and I've suddenly got two younger sisters all over again," he said. He wasn't close enough to Rose to classify her as a sister – yet. "I don't know what I'd do if I lost them all; I don't know that I could survive that again," he whispered. "That's why I hesitated; if something goes wrong, I don't know that I could bear to lose your family, too."

"Jasper, baby, listen to me," Edward said quietly. "I know it's all gone fast and I can't say that I'm not a bit freaked out, too," he said, stroking through Jasper's hair at the base of his skull. "We're not going anywhere. I know that's not really a promise I can make, trust me, I know that better than anyone, but you have to believe me when I say we're not going to leave you if we can help it. And I'm not going to hurt you. I love you, Jasper. It scares me too, the connection we seem to have. You get me in a way no one else has in a very long time.

"You told me once that even if our relationship didn't work out, you'd still be here for me, remember? We're not going anywhere, Jasper. If six months from now we're not together, you think Esme's just going to disown you? Emmett would stop being your gym buddy? You're a part of the family, Jas, and nothing's going to change that.

"Besides," Edward continued. "I would think that with all the shit you've put up with from me, you'd believe that I wouldn't give up because you can be a moody bastard," he said with a soft chuckle. "I love you, Jasper," he said again. "Warts and all. I can give you the space you need, and I know this makes me sound like a hypocrite, but I'd hope you can talk to me when something's bothering you."

Jasper nodded. "I love you too, Edward."

He felt Edward kiss the top of his head and murmur an "I know, baby," against his scalp. They sat quietly for awhile, Jasper absorbing Edward's words. It was foolish of him to think that Edward could break things off with him so easily, and that the family wouldn't want to have anything to do with him. But he'd been hurt so badly in the past that it was the logic his mind had managed to work out.

"Are you going to be okay tomorrow?" Edward asked softly, his hand moving to Jasper's neck, thumb making small circles against his skin.

"I think so," Jasper answered. "Talking today has helped put some things into perspective."

"Okay," Edward said. "I love you, and I want you to have a good Christmas, so if that means we need to escape for awhile…"

"I'll be fine," Jasper assured him, sitting up and kissing him softly. "I don't want to take you away from your Christmas, either."

Edward kissed him back and it was sweet and tender. "We'll just take it as it comes, alright?"

"Deal," Jasper answered. He caught a glimpse at the clock out of the corner of his eye. "It's my turn to go downstairs," he said. "I'll see you in a bit? I have a couple things I need to put together, so I may be awhile."

Edward nodded and kissed him again.

Jasper smiled and gave Edward's hand a squeeze before he slipped from the bed and into a pair of Vans and made his way downstairs. He pulled his stocking stuffers from where he'd stashed them in Carlisle's office and made quick work of getting them into the appropriate stocking, resisting the temptation to look into his own.

From there, he grabbed his coat, scarf, and gloves from the coat rack and met Esme on the back patio. She'd already drug out the large box that had been shipped to her house. "Thanks for helping with this," Jasper said, watching his breath cloud in front of him.

"I'm happy to do it," Esme answered from under her muffler. "Hopefully we can do it quickly," she said with a laugh, giving him a one armed hug. "I'm glad you decided to let me help. It's very thoughtful, but it's such a large gift…"

He kissed her cheek. "And you and Carlisle will love it come spring," he teased.

"I wonder if Bella could make us a round blanket," Esme mused as she stepped away and started stripping away packaging.

It turned out to be mostly assembled, they just had to remove the packaging and place the cushions, and Jasper affixed the huge red bow he'd also had mail ordered. Before they went back inside, Jasper unscrewed the light bulbs for the lights on the patio so no one (Edward) could see until morning.

"Merry Christmas, Jasper," Esme said after they stepped back inside and hung their coats.

"Merry Christmas, Esme. Thank you for everything."

She smiled brightly and he stooped down so she could kiss his cheek.

"Oi! It's my turn!" Emmett called from the stairs. Esme laughed and hugged Jasper again before she padded off down the hall and Jasper passed Emmett on the stairs.

The lights were low in the bedroom when Jasper returned, slipping out of his shoes. Edward had dozed off and Jasper slid into the bed beside him.

"My turn?" Edward asked.

"Not yet. Emmett's just gone down," Jasper explained, shifting over to get more comfortable. "Merry Christmas, baby," he said, kissing Edward softly.

"Merry Christmas, love," Edward returned and they snuggled down until Edward had to take his turn playing Santa Claus.

* * *

It's nearly Christmas in the Garden. Sorry for drawing it out, but Jasper demanded to have his conversation with Bella, and I wanted Christmas to stand alone.


	28. Chapter 27: Christmas is for Kids

Seriously you guys, you make my day, every time you hit that green button. I've been having a shitty couple of weeks, and your appreciation of this story is truly keeping a bright spot in my life.

* * *

Jasper was surprised to find that it was after eight in the morning when he woke on Christmas day. He'd half expected Emmett to have woken everyone around six, anxious to get on with his plans to propose to Rosalie (and because it was Christmas). He could hear noises from downstairs, but nothing that sounded rushed or hurried. He cleared his throat lightly, trying to dislodge a slightly gummy feeling, probably from sleeping with his mouth open. He felt slightly congested, and hoped he hadn't managed to let himself get sick over the first part of their vacation.

"Merry Christmas, Jas," Edward said quietly, beside him. "You snore."

Jasper laughed softly. He didn't snore often, but it must have been bad for Edward to mention it. "Sorry," he said causally. "Merry Christmas." He kissed the top of Edward's head, not wanting to assault him with horrid morning breath, since it seemed he'd snored all night long.

Edward snuggled close, kissing Jasper's collarbone, and they fell quiet, listening to the sounds of the house coming awake around them. "We should probably get up," Edward said after awhile. "Emmett won't be patient for too much longer, and Mom's probably got breakfast nearly ready."

Jasper nodded. They took their time getting out of bed, and jostled playfully for position at the sink to brush teeth and wash faces before heading downstairs. Jasper stuffed another handkerchief into his pocket.

"Good morning, boys!" Emma called cheerfully. "Merry Christmas."

"Merry Christmas," Edward and Jasper echoed, Edward crossing to kiss her cheek as they entered the kitchen. From the looks of things, they were the last ones up. They each fixed a cup of coffee and Esme shooed them into the living room.

Emmett was sitting on the floor near the tree, looking at once anxious and excited. Rose was perched behind him on the sofa, idly playing with his hair. Bella and Alice had taken one of the large lounges for themselves, and Alice was plaiting Bella's hair into two long braids on either side of her head. Carlisle and David had robes on over their pajamas, seated on the sofa with Rose. Jasper tugged Edward into his lap to take the other chair.

"Breakfast is in the oven, so we have enough time to do stockings," Esme announced, Emma on her heels from the kitchen.

Emmett bounced to his feet and started distributing everyone's stockings after Rose placed a Santa hat on his head.

Jasper had put what he considered a gag gift in everyone's stocking. Well, except maybe Edward's, he thought as he watched his lover's cheeks turn slightly pink as he buried the flavored lube farther into the depths of the stocking, rather than placing it in the growing pile next to him. Bella giggled over the 'Choose Your Own Adventure' books he'd found, and Rosalie got a kick from the mini toy cars. For Emmett he'd gotten a bunch of gummy candy food. Esme looked at the plastic flowers with a happy glint in her eye, and he had a feeling he'd find them on her desk when school resumed. Carlisle and Alice's gag gifts (and one more for Emmett and Edward) were under the tree from 'Santa.'

Jasper's own stocking was full of coffee, ginger, and mint flavored candies instead of all the chocolates that everyone else had, and he smiled, loving that everyone in the family knew his tastes. There was an apple and orange at the bottom, to fill out the toe and heel, and a large bottle of vitamin C tablets filled out the rest of the foot. There was a deck of cards, nail clippers, a package of guitar picks, a nice set of mechanical pencils, and a fancy red pen, also. There were some classic handheld games he remembered from his childhood and a few mini puzzles. Everyone seemed to have a crocheted round thing, and Bella spoke up, describing it as a coffee cup jacket that was reusable. Jasper thought it was very thoughtful and made a note to leave it in his messenger bag.

Edward snuggled into his side while they watched everyone else and drank their coffee. "Flavored lube?" he whispered.

Jasper grinned. "Mmhm." What Edward didn't know was that Jasper had also ordered a variety of edible body paints as well.

"Cheeky."

Jasper simply drank his coffee, his hand sliding up under the hem of Edward's waffle-knit shirt, just resting against his abs.

"Emmett, stay out of that pile!" Esme called, laughing. "Breakfast is ready, then we can get back to gifts."

Everyone helped set the table and get juice, milk, and coffee out, and Esme carried two large casserole dishes to the table, followed by Emma with a large bowl of fruit, and Bella with another tray.

"What's this?" Jasper asked Edward quietly.

"Breakfast pizza," he explained. "Croissant dough on the bottom, one has bacon, one has sausage, potatoes, eggs, and cheese. The other's fruit on a sugar cookie dough with a cream cheese spread."

Jasper tried a piece of the fruit pizza but passed it off to Emmett, finding it entirely too sweet for breakfast, but ate heartily of the other two.

While Jasper and Edward volunteered to clean up, Esme brewed more coffee and Carlisle found the Christmas music channel through the TV. They rejoined everyone in the living room, finding that Alice and Bella had sacrificed their chair to Carlisle and Esme while David and Emma took the couch next to Rose, and the girls settled on the floor.

Emmett resumed the role he'd probably be playing most of the day and started handing out the Santa piles. "This looks like you, Jas," he said, passing over some things.

Jasper felt his face heat up at the small stack of boxer shorts that lay on top of the pile. "Esme," Edward whispered with a grin, nodding at the piles for each of the guys. They also all had a package of tube socks. Jasper also found a couple of iTunes gift cards, and, shooting a wry grin at Emmett, an assortment of holiday, neon, and lollipop fashioned condoms.

They went around and Carlisle laughed at the toy doctors' kit Jasper had picked up at the toy store, and Alice bounced up and down at the poster kit. Emmett loved the kids chemistry set, and Edward fixed him with a look at the cowboy teddy bear and the spare outfit of Marine Dress Blues that went with it. It took Jasper a moment to identify the emotions in Edward's eyes, but the soft lingering kiss he got was in no way confusing.

"I know you're going away a lot this spring, and I wanted you to have something you could take with you and think of me," Jasper confessed quietly while everyone's attention was focused on Emmett's attempt to make something explode from the chemistry set. He hadn't been able to decide between the cowboy outfit and the uniform, so he'd gotten both. "It's supposed to be a bit of a joke, too. I know how you like to cuddle," he said softly.

"I love it. Thank you," Edward said softly, settling back against him with a smile, the teddy bear in his lap.

After everyone had finished sorting through their unwrapped gifts, Emmett got busy sorting through everything under the tree until everyone had a pile at their feet or side and they took turns going around the circle opening one at a time.

Jasper opened Bella's gift first and found a pair of house slippers fashioned after cowboy boots in brown and blue. He laughed and thanked her, tugging them on over his socks. They were warm, and he loved them. Jasper also received several Alice originals, including a noodle bowl and tall coffee mug, and a framed black and white candid photo of him and Edward.

Bella seemed pleased with the 'made by' labels he'd had made for her, as well as a couple of crochet books he hadn't seen among her collection in her room. Edward had given her two new charms for the bracelet he'd bought her a couple of years ago, an enamel sun, and a compass.

Rosalie, Alice, and Esme also received charms from Edward, and he had put a bit of thought into each one. For Rose he'd selected a rose, a cute charm that said 'panic button' and a wrench. Alice's were a dress form and paint palette. For his mother he'd gotten a butterfly with yellow enamel and a charm that said mother in several different languages. Esme also received a vacuum cleaner from Carlisle, which Jasper had been sure would land his surrogate father into the dog-house. But Esme actually seemed excited by the round robotic sweeper, so it was possible it had been something she'd wanted. Carlisle seemed to have covered his bases by also getting her jewelry. Jasper also got her a charm, a cowboy hat.

Carlisle received new golf clubs from Esme, a series of golf lessons from Emmett and Rose, and a scarf and beanie from Bella. Alice gave her uncle a frame of five pictures that he could take to the office. In the center was Esme, and around it where photos of Jasper and Edward, Emmett and Rose, Alice and Bella, and one of Esme, Edward, and Emmett. Jasper had ordered Carlisle a set of double eighteen dominoes, stamped with the Cullen family crest on the back side. He seemed momentarily floored by the gift.

Bella had made everyone's gifts. Edward got a hat and scarf in a similar pattern to Carlisle's in green, white, and navy blue, and Emmett got an afghan that was apparently made from scraps but looked pretty good. She made Alice a sleep mask and a pair of slippers fashioned after a popular line of sheepskin boots that Jasper remembered seeing various female students wearing on campus. Esme received a hat, scarf, and fingerless glove set in candy apple green, and Rosalie got a gorgeous scarf that reminded Jasper of a watercolor painting.

Edward was looking confused by the time they got near the end, but he didn't voice it. Jasper smiled softly when he saw Edward trying not to look hurt that there was no other gift for him from Jasper under the tree, or that he hadn't gotten anything from his mother, either.

Jasper nudged him. "The gift from your mother and I is on the back porch. She insisted she go halves with me, since it's something that has to stay here."

Edward frowned, but struggled to his feet, giving Jasper a hand up. "Close your eyes, baby," Jasper whispered, and led him slowly through the kitchen and onto the back patio, feeling the eyes of the rest of the family on them. He opened the doors and guided them through. "You can look now, Edward."

Jasper had ordered a large round day bed for the Cullen patio, since he and Edward seemed to spend so much time out there talking, and the lounge chairs were so small and uncomfortable for them to curl up together. It had a dark brown (espresso, according to the catalog) wicker base, and the cushions and pillows were a bright green, white, and dark brown that matched Esme's existing furniture.

Edward gaped for a moment. "Jasper it's…"

Jasper hugged him from behind, resting his chin on Edward's shoulder. Edward turned and kissed him. "It's perfect," Edward said. "It's too much, but thank you."

"Well, the family will get just as much use out of it, I think. You just get priority when you're here," Jasper teased. He kissed him back. "Merry Christmas, Edward. I love you."

"I love you, too," Edward whispered back.

"Hey, loverbirds! Get back in here. We're not done yet!" Emmett yelled from the kitchen.

They laughed and after one last kiss they went back inside hand in hand and resettled in their chair to watch the others finish.

Jasper had saved his gift from Edward for the last. He balanced the large flat package on both of their laps and carefully removed the wrapping, awed at what he found inside. Edward had given him four prints of Texas landscapes, framed in slim black frames, already strung with wire, he assumed, to be hung in his dorm room. "They're gorgeous, Edward. Thank you," he said quietly, kissing Edward softly.

"Your room is pretty bare," Edward explained softly as Jasper lifted each frame to look at the art. "I thought these might be a good way to brighten it up, and maybe give you a little bit of home with you here."

Jasper smiled softly, a momentary pang of sadness at the thought of home overwhelmed by his feelings of love and acceptance in the presence of his partner and family. "They'll be perfect," he said.

When everyone finished, Jasper cleared his throat again. "I have one more gift, for the whole group," he announced. He nudged Edward off his lap so he could retrieve it from where he'd hidden it. He returned to the living room and handed it to Carlisle to open.

Jasper had ordered a custom cribbage board for the family, complete with a cut out in the back side for a deck of cards, and a velvet pouch to secure everything. He'd also gotten a couple of books on how to play. Jasper had been surprised when he'd learned of the family's love of games and found a lack of cribbage boards in the house.

"Jasper, thank you," Carlisle said, as he passed everything over to Esme. "That's very thoughtful, and I think we now have a plan for New Year's Eve," he said with a broad smile.

They sat around for awhile and chatted while they started idly picking up the trash. Esme wandered off for a trash bag to gather wrapping paper and then began her little vacuum, which had been charging while they opened gifts.

"Hold on, I think something rolled under the couch," Emmett said, slipping out from under Rose's arm where he'd settled next to her on the couch. "I don't want it to get jammed the first time out." He knelt on the floor and made a show of peeking under the couch, running his hand in the gap between the sofa and the floor.

Jasper had to bite the inside of his cheek to keep from laughing at Emmett's less than stellar acting skills as he realized what was happening. Apparently he failed because Edward nudged him not-so-gently.

"Ah, there it is," Emmett grumbled and Jasper could just see the black box between his fingers. He was perfectly positioned at Rosalie's feet, and he looked up into her face.

Jasper glanced over at Esme when he heard her gasp softly, her eyes wide and pooling with tears as the trash bag fell quietly to the floor and she gripped Carlisle's shoulder.

"Rosie, I love you more than anything, and you've made me happier than I've ever been," Emmett said simply. "Will you make me happy for the rest of my life and marry me?" As he spoke he popped the box open and held it up to her.

"Yes!" Rose answered, flinging herself forward and wrapping her arms around Emmett's neck before he had a chance to slip the ring onto her finger.

Carlisle had been prepared and passed a handkerchief to his wife, who was crying happy tears, Jasper assumed, at seeing her eldest son propose to the girl he knew she already thought of as a daughter.

Alice clapped happily. "Oh, you have to let me help plan!" she said as Rosalie lifted herself from Emmett's hug, wiping away tears of her own with her fingers before letting Emmett slip the diamond solitaire onto the appropriate finger of her left hand, her hands shaking minutely. The diamond was shaped like a cat's eye, and the silver band curved around it, connecting at the tips at each end.

Jasper hugged Edward before they slipped from the chair to join everyone making their congratulations to Emmett and Rosalie. Rose was beaming as she accepted everyone's hugs and Emmett had a sappy smile on his face as the handshakes went around. Eventually everyone split up to get ready for the day and to get things going for dinner.

Esme had planned their meal for two in the afternoon so they could be at the hospital by five. After showering and dressing in nice trousers and a sweater, Edward and Jasper carried their gifts downstairs to join the pile everyone else had contributed to.

"Geez, Edward. Overboard much?" Emmett asked, looking at the large pile of gifts.

"Blame Jasper," Edward said, pointing at him.

Jasper shrugged when Emmett looked at him. "Better to have too many than not enough? Besides, it's not like I don't have the money, and what better way to spend it than on kids who deserve a Christmas."

Carlisle laughed and clasped Jasper's shoulder. "Very good, Son."

Emmett grumbled something under his breath about favoritism, but he was still grinning, riding the high of Rosalie having accepted his proposal, like there had been any doubt about the outcome. While the ladies worked in the kitchen, the guys started dividing the pile of presents into piles for girls and boys and shuffled them into bags.

Most of the prep work for dinner had been done the day before, so once the ham was in the oven, the ladies brought some snack trays out and they all settled in to another Cullen family Christmas Tradition: watching Die Hard.

"Seriously?" Jasper asked Edward quietly as Alice and Bella turned off the lights to all but the tree and settled down on the floor in front of the couch in two bean bags from the basement.

"What?" Edward asked with his crooked grin, snuggling into Jasper's side. "It's a Christmas movie."

Jasper shook his head and laughed softly. Everyone had sat close to their partners, with Alice and Bella leaning on each other as they watched the film. Jasper managed to keep his hands mostly to himself while surrounded by everyone.

Carlisle's pager remained conspicuously quiet throughout that day, Jasper thought, given that he'd been on call for the day. He could recall several holidays as a kid when his dad's on call status had turned into a job and he'd had to leave as soon as they'd finished gifts, or on Christmas Eve, delaying everything altogether. But he supposed things at the hospital were different, and maybe the staff was having a fairly quiet day.

When the movie was over, they left the lights low while Esme and Emma went off to finish dinner. Everyone else hung out and let Carlisle flip through the channels.

Dinner was fantastic, as usual. Esme had prepared a honey baked ham, green beans, rolls, scalloped potatoes, and devilled eggs. Over dinner, Alice made plans with her mom, Esme, and Bella to go shopping to take advantage of the after-Christmas sales. Carlisle and David were planning on meeting up with a couple of Carlisle's colleagues for a round of golf, and Jasper had no doubt that Emmett and Rosalie would be making themselves scarce, leaving Edward and Jasper on their own for the day. Jasper had a few ideas on how he and Edward could pass their time alone.

While Edward and Jasper cleaned up from dinner, Emmett went with the girls to get made up as Santa Claus, and the girls had helper outfits they'd be wearing. Carlisle and David loaded the gifts into the back of the SUV while Esme and Emma boxed up all the meals they'd prepared. They gathered in the living room while they waited for everyone else.

Each of the girls was wearing an outfit that coordinated with the holiday, but also fit their personalities. Rose had on a short red dress, trimmed in white fur and a matching Santa hat. She also had on thigh high stockings with a pair of very high chunky heels. Alice was dressed more like an elf in a green jumpsuit with a work belt on, though in place of tools, she had her camera and a string of candy canes, and work boots with bells on them. She had a matching hard hat with her name printed on it that said "Toy Workshop."

Bella had on white leggings with a long green sweater with a wide neck line that showed off her shoulders and the red tank top she wore underneath. Her hair had been pulled back and she was also wearing a Santa hat, and she had on red ballet flats.

Emmett emerged after the girls in a full on Santa costume, fake beard, calf-high black boots and all. At least he was big enough to fill out the costume, though Jasper suspected that he had a couple of pillows under the coat to make him round enough to pass as the jolly old elf.

"Ho ho ho! Let's get this show on the road!" he boomed.

They split up into two cars again, Rosalie and Emmett riding with Carlisle and Esme while everyone else piled into the SUV. David relinquished the keys to Edward, who navigated his way to the hospital with ease.

They met up with Carlisle and the others in the lobby. "Alright, we're going up to the pediatric ward," he explained. "Those who are able to be out of bed have gathered in the lounge, but we'll be making room rounds, too." They had all the bags of gifts ready to go, and Carlisle had grabbed a cart from the nurses' station for Esme and Emma to stack up their plates of meals for the families. David took up pushing the cart as they loaded into the elevator up to the proper floor.

There was a party atmosphere in the lounge on the kids' floor of the hospital. Someone had decorated and there was a fake tree in the corner strung with lights and ornaments. Kids were gathered around in pajamas and there was a table set up with some treats and a punch bowl while nurses lingered on the fringes, also having a good time, but keeping an eye on things. Parents mingled with their kids and each other.

"Santa!" The general cheer went up as Emmett preceded everyone into the room with a booming "Ho, ho ho!"

"Merry Christmas!" Emmett continued. "I've heard that there are a lot of very good boys and girls here who deserve to have a little Christmas delivered to them. Am I right?"

"Yes!" the kids in the room cheered, and Jasper observed relieved looks on a lot of the parents' faces.

"Well, my helpers and I have just the thing. Miss Alice here is going to help me by taking some pictures for all of you. Miss Bella and Miss Esme and Miss Emma have made up some special treats for your families. And my lovely Miss Rose is going to help me with…" he trailed off.

"Presents!" the children shouted.

Everyone laughed and from there the festivities kicked off. Jasper, Edward, David, and Carlisle had no official role in the party, though Carlisle was familiar to some of the parents and staff and was doing a lot of hand shaking and chatting with adults. Jasper hung back and watched the kids, sick and healthy alike, run around. Some lined up patiently to wait for their turn with Em and Rose, while others just mingled with their friends or dragged their parents to meet Alice.

Alice had set up some chairs near the tree and was snapping family Christmas photos for whoever wanted them, in between snapping candid shots of the party itself. She'd set up a small notebook so the families could write down their information and Alice would send them photos later.

David was helping Esme, Bella, and Emma pass out food to the families. Several of the parents embraced them with tears in their eyes, clearly moved at the gift. Having spent one holiday in the hospital with his mama, he understood just how much that home cooked meal would be appreciated by the families, who probably wanted nothing more than to be able to take their kids home and enjoy a nice quiet family Christmas.

Jasper moved behind the table with the cookies and punch and helped to fill up the cups that were rapidly disappearing. He looked down when he felt something thud against his legs. A tiny girl had wrapped herself around his calves. She couldn't have been more than five, looked to be painfully thin and incredibly pale, her blonde hair wispy and pulled into a tail on each side of her head. She was wearing a pair of pink pajamas with feet on them.

"Hi, sweetheart," Jasper said, kneeling down to greet the girl. She shifted her grip to around his neck and he embraced her easily, rising and settling her on his hip. "What's your name?"

"Shelly," she answered in a whisper.

"Well, Shelly," he said softly. "Are you having a good day?"

"Mm-hm," she hummed, hugging him tighter. "Is that really Santa?"

He smiled at her childlike awe. "It really is," he assured her. "He's a friend of mine. Would you like to meet him?"

She shook her head 'no.' "He's really big."

He laughed softly. "Yes, he is. Well, how about my friend Alice, then," he said, pointing toward where Alice was handing out candy canes and snapping pictures of families. "She'd like to take a picture of you with your family. Maybe then your daddy can take you to meet Santa?"

She nodded. "Okay."

"Okay." He knew he was going to get in trouble for carrying her once they got home, but he didn't much care. By the time they'd crossed the room, Shelly had come out from hiding in his neck and was looking around as Rose and Emmett started distributing presents to the sick kids and their siblings. "Hi, Alice."

"Hi Jasper!" she said cheerily from behind her camera. "Who's your friend?"

"This is Shelly," he said with a smile. "She'd like to get a picture with her family before she meets Santa. She's a bit scared," he said in a whisper.

Alice beamed. "Aw, honey, don't be afraid of Santa. He's just a big teddy bear." She shifted her camera to her belt, handed her a mini candy cane, and held out her arms for Shelly to shift to her. "Now, why don't you show me to your mom and dad and we'll get that picture."

Shelly smiled shyly and nodded.

"Okay! We'll see you later, Jasper," Alice said, and set off with Shelly, talking about what she'd like for Christmas.

"Making new friends?" Edward asked as he stepped up to Jasper's side, casually draping his arm around Jasper's waist.

"Yup." He leaned into Edward slightly. "They all look so happy."

Edward nodded. "It's a nice break for them. A lot of these kids have been here for awhile, and it's hard for their parents to do Christmas with everything else. And it's really hard on the brothers and sisters, too."

"I'm glad I could be a part of it," Jasper admitted.

"Good, cause I may have committed you to something later," Edward said, his crooked smile firmly in place.

"Oh yeah?" Jasper asked, teasing. He knew Edward wouldn't have signed him up for anything he was uncomfortable with or that would have been too potentially embarrassing.

"Hm," Edward answered noncommittally, with a smile.

"Fine, keep your secrets," Jasper said, as he saw Emmett rise from the chair he'd perched in with Rose at his elbow. "But I'll get it out of you sooner or later."

Edward grinned.

"Alright, munchkins," Emmett announced. "Santa needs to take a little break, but not to worry, the party's not over yet. Miss Bella?"

Bella joined Emmett, a familiar guitar in her hands. Jasper shot Edward a look and shook his head.

"My friend Jasper is going to play for you all while I'm gone. Would you like that?" Emmett asked.

As the kids cheered, Edward whispered quietly. "They're going to do the room rounds with the nurses. You don't mind, do you?"

Jasper shook his head again; he didn't mind at all. He gave Edward a squeeze and moved to take over at Emmett's chair, taking his guitar from Bella and tuning it idly, before he settled on the carpet, folding his legs under him.

"Jasper's a little shy," Emmett said with a wink at Jasper. "So you'll make him feel welcome, right?"

The kids cheered again and many of them moved to sit a bit closer, dragging their parents with them.

"Have fun kids. Ho ho ho!" Emmett shouted as he left, Rose, Alice, Carlisle, and Emma at his heels.

Jasper strummed a few chords and smiled as Bella settled on his side and his new friend Shelly snuck up close. He cleared his throat lightly and began to play Jingle Bells, the kids joining in on the lyrics. When they'd sang it through twice, Jasper stopped.

"Now, I'm a teacher," he said to the groans of all the kids in the room. "Hey!" he protested, causing them to giggle. "Just for that, I'm going to _have_ to teach you something," he said with a grin to more groans. "Listen close," he instructed as he played a simple Jingle Bells melody again.

"Jingle Bells

Batman smells, Robin laid an egg

Batmobile lost a wheel

And Joker took ballet, hey!"

He played it and sang it through twice more before the kids joined in, giggling. When they finished, he opened it up to requests, ignoring Edward's call of "Freebird!" from the back of the room that made the parents laugh and the kids look around, confused.

Jasper played for awhile, mostly sticking to familiar Christmas carols. The parents helped the kids sing, though some of the older ones did okay on their own. After awhile, Shelly had snugged up close to his side and Bella had a lapful next to him, and Edward had moved from the back of the room to join them on the floor. It took the kids a bit longer to cuddle up with him, but he eventually ended up with a couple little ones in his lap as well.

The kids were so enraptured that they didn't notice Emmett sneak back in with Rosalie at his side, both having changed out of their costumes. Jasper noted the thoughtful look on Emmett's face and the envious one on Rose's. Jasper nodded at her, silently inviting her to join them and get a snuggle of her own. Emmett did too, leaving Carlisle to deliver the news that Santa had to leave.

They spent the rest of the evening playing with the kids and their presents until the nurses began to chivvy everyone back to their rooms.

Jasper glanced down when he felt a tug on his trousers. He knelt down to look into Shelly's wide blue eyes.

"Will you come play for us again?" she whispered.

"I'll certainly try, sweetheart," he said, and she hugged him before running off when someone called her name.

Jasper stood slowly, wincing when his back protested the movement and the abuse he'd done to it throughout the day.

"If you'd really like to," a voice said behind him. "There's a gathering every third weekend."

Jasper turned and saw Nancy, the day nurse from when he'd had to stay over.

She grinned at him. "Good to see you less grumpy."

Jasper laughed. "Thanks, Nancy. And I'll talk to Carlisle about it. Did you transfer to pediatrics?" He asked.

"Naw," she answered. "I was going off shift and decided to peek in and see how things were going. My husband's holding dinner for me, so I should get going. See you around, Grump," she said with a wave.

"You too, Nancy," Jasper said with a shake of his head. She was too much.

"Hey," Edward said, greeting Nancy on her way out. "Ready to go?"

Jasper nodded. He took Edward's hand with a bright smile and they followed everyone else out, hand in hand. It was by far the best Christmas he'd had in nearly a decade. Perhaps he could finally move on after all.

* * *

The prints Edward purchased were by PORFIRIO SALINAS, an artist from Texas in the early 20th century. A Google images search showed he painted in several seasons, so I'm going with Edward purchasing one for each for Jasper to hang in his dorm room.

There will be pictures of almost everything on the blog.

I'll also put the breakfast pizza recipes (both), and my standing rib roast method also on the blog. Both pairs of boots are in my Ravelry queue. Jasper's are based on a pair of baby booties, and I want to make the Ugg knockoffs for myself one of these days.


	29. Chapter 28: New Traditions

Naelany and wishingforlove continue to be fantastic betas.

Please read the note at the end.

* * *

Edward watched with affection as Jasper let the little girl sidle up to him while he played his guitar and sang for the children. He looked very at ease sitting on the floor playing Christmas songs with the children singing along. After the excitement of having 'Santa' visit and getting presents, Jasper's performance was very calming and Edward heard mutterings of 'thank goodness,' coming from many of the parents and nurses as the kids settled down.

"He's good with them," Rosalie said quietly at his side, having changed out of her 'Mrs. Claus' costume into jeans and a nice sweater. Jasper was still playing while the kids had started digging out some of their toys to play with. A little boy crawled into Rose's lap and she hugged him before he sat down to play with his new car, making little 'vroom vroom' noises as he raced the car over her legs and the floor.

"He is," Edward agreed. "So's Em," he said nodding toward his brother, who was similarly clad with kids in his lap. "He's going to be a good daddy some day," he said, referring to his brother.

Rosalie smiled, looking down at her ring for a moment. "Yeah, he will be," she whispered. "I know he's ready. I am, too." She smiled. "I was both relieved and disappointed back in November. The timing wasn't ideal, but I'm so ready to be a mom. I'm thinking about a June wedding," she confessed. "Six months seems long enough, and I'm not getting any younger."

At only a year younger than Jasper's thirty, Edward knew that to be true. He also knew her age wasn't really a factor except that she'd likely prefer to have a brood, and having waited to settle down, she may have to settle for a few.

"Six months seems like plenty of time, especially if you let Alice help plan," Edward advised. His cousin may have found her primary career in arts and teaching, but she also loved to plan events as evidenced by her control over the Halloween and Fourth of July parties his parents hosted every year.

"I wouldn't dream of doing it without her," Rosalie answered with a smile. "Without any of you," she clarified.

"Alright, kiddos!" one of the nurses, dressed in festive scrubs announced, clapping her hands. "It's time for bed check. Please thank our guests and start heading back to your rooms."

The toddler in Edward's lap stood and wrapped his arms around Edward's neck. "Fank you for playing wif us," he whispered to Edward. He looked half-asleep already, worn out by the excitement of the day.

"You're very welcome," Edward said sincerely, hugging him back. "Let's find your parents, hm?" He couldn't stand while holding the child, but got himself up and then lifted the tot in his arms and managed to find his way to the kid's parents. Edward handed him off and accepted the parents' thanks as well, before making his way back to Jasper.

He passed the nurse he remembered from checking Jasper out of the hospital two weeks previous and greeted her with a nod and a "Hey." She smiled and continued on her way out and Edward went to claim Jasper for the ride home.

"Ready to go?" He asked Jasper, his guitar back in its case at his feet.

"Yup." Jasper answered with a nod, taking Edward's right hand in his left, hefting his guitar in his right as they followed the rest of the family out, saying a last few goodbyes and accepting a few more gracious words of thanks on their way out and down to the cars.

"Did you have fun?" Edward asked as they walked.

"I did," Jasper answered. "Nancy said they have monthly gatherings for all the kids. I may talk to Carlisle about coming back to play some more."

Edward gave his hand a squeeze. "I'm sure they'd love to have you," he said. He wondered at his lack of jealousy at his partner's musicianship, but Edward was well aware it was his own lack of confidence that continued to hold him back from re-pursuing his dreams. Though, he also had to admit, he rather liked teaching. As much as he'd love to perform again, he wasn't sure he'd want to go back to the orchestra. Not full time, at any rate.

"I've been thinking about a way I could do some service, since Veterans Day," Jasper admitted quietly as they walked behind the rest of the family. "But I won't have a lot of time next semester…"

Edward smiled. "It may not seem like a lot to you, Jas, but to them it'll be everything."

Jasper returned the smile. "I know," he answered softly.

When they reached the parking garage and the cars, Edward pulled Jasper into a hug. "I love you," he whispered.

"I love you too," Jasper answered, kissing him softly.

Edward slipped back into the driver's seat of the SUV with Jasper riding shotgun. The ride back to the house was lively as everyone chatted about how the day had gone. At the house they gathered in the dining room for their own dessert and more games as a family. Bella pulled out a game called Apples to Apples and quickly explained the basic rules as she passed out cards to everyone while Esme and Emma prepared dessert.

Carlisle turned the Christmas music back on and they passed the rest of the night playing and eating until the parental units retired. Emmett brought out a bottle of vodka and six glasses and they moved to the living room and sprawled out on the furniture. Emmett poured and they each took a glass, toasting Rosalie and Emmett with a shot. Emmett poured again and they settled back with their drinks when Bella got up and retrieved the cranberry and orange juices from the fridge, splashing cranberry into her and Alice's glasses, and orange into Rosalie's. Jasper also topped his drink off with cranberry, while Edward and Emmett continued to enjoy theirs neat.

"So, you all know you're in the wedding, right?" Emmett asked.

Edward rolled his eyes and Rosalie slugged his shoulder.

"What Emmett means to ask," Rosalie continued as Emmett rubbed his shoulder with a pout, "is whether you'd all stand up for us. Bella, the only reason I'm asking Alice to stand as my maid of honor is because she actually i_wants_/i do everything involved with that."

"Sold!" Bella said with a laugh. "Seriously, Rose, it's alright. I don't mind one way or the other, but Alice is probably the better choice since I've got a deadline this summer."

"When is this shindig supposed to happen, anyway?" Jasper asked.

Emmett and Rose looked between each other. "June," they answered together.

"We should start planning!" Alice declared. "Six months? Come on!" She stood, gulping down the contents of her glass and reached for Bella and Rose. She succeeded in dragging them upstairs while the guys remained behind, laughing.

The boys sat around and talked for awhile, Edward agreeing to be Emmett's best man and Jasper consenting to standing in with him as well. Nothing too serious was discussed, and a few drinks were consumed, and Edward thought it was a nice quiet way to round out the holiday.

Eventually the talk died down and Alice and Bella came back downstairs, headed for their makeshift bedroom in the basement. Both wished them all one more Merry Christmas and hugs were distributed before they disappeared. Emmett took that as his cue to find Rosalie for a celebration. Edward and Jasper went upstairs after returning everything to the kitchen.

After they changed for bed, Jasper crawled into bed with Edward, and curled up next to him, laying his head against Edward's chest, allowing Edward to hold him.

"I'm glad you had a good day," Edward said quietly after they'd turned the lights out.

"It was honestly the best holiday I've had in years," Jasper confessed. "I'm just trying to remember everything that we talked about yesterday. That it's okay to move on, and live my life," he said quietly. "But it was nice having the spotlight mostly on Em and Rosalie, too."

Edward laughed softly. He was relieved that Jasper had made it through the day and seemed to have had a good time. The kids at the hospital were good for him, it appeared, and Edward made a mental note to go with him, if he managed to join in the monthly parties. It might turn out to be good therapy for both of them. His hands drifted idly over Jasper's back, the touch meant to be comforting rather than arousing and Jasper snuggled into him just a bit more.

"Any thought on where we want to go for our getaway?" he asked Jasper quietly.

"San Francisco sounded good," Jasper answered. "I'm sure we can find plenty to do there for a weekend or slightly more."

"Sure? It was just an idea." Edward clarified.

"Why not," Jasper answered with a shrug. "It's as good as any place, and I didn't have anywhere in mind."

"Alright," Edward responded, kissing Jasper. "We can look at dates and stuff later."

"Mm." Jasper agreed, and further thoughts of their holiday were put on hold as they focused on each other, eventually drifting off to sleep.

The house was quiet when Edward woke the next morning. Jasper was still fast asleep beside him, having shifted onto his back during the night. Edward had apparently taken up his usual sleep position as well, on his side tucked up against Jasper. A glance at the clock revealed it was after nine, which meant everyone else was out of the house for the day. As he lay there and watched Jasper sleep, a plan began to come together in his mind.

Clouds had rolled in overnight, painting the sky in shades of gray. It would be slightly warmer than the previous couple of days, and there was a good chance it'd rain.

Edward slipped out of bed after whispering a few reassurances to Jasper, who promptly went back to sleep when Edward 'shushed' him. He slipped into a hoodie, grabbed a few things from his bureau, and made his way downstairs.

It took him a little while to gather everything he needed. There were spare blankets in the linen closet, and fortunately when his parents had renovated the back patio area they'd made sure there were power outlets available. He carried everything he needed out to the patio and set it up (including a spare electric blanket), smiling to himself when the first drops of rain spattered against the fiberglass roof. Edward switched on the decorative lights his mother had strung and went back inside to get the first part of his plan ready.

Fifteen minutes later, Edward was carrying a tray of a simple breakfast of scrambled eggs, toast, coffee and juice up the stairs. Though he still limped without his cane, he was beginning to find it easier to move without it. Jasper was still asleep when Edward nudged the door open with his elbow.

He set the tray on his bedside table and climbed back on the bed. Edward curled up next to Jasper and kissed him lightly, cupping Jasper's cheek in his palm and running his thumb over his cheekbone. Jasper stirred and his eyes opened slowly, revealing the blue that was still slightly unfocused with sleep. His lips stretched into a smile under Edward's, and Edward kissed him again.

"Good morning," Edward said quietly.

"Mornin'," Jasper answered.

Edward kissed him again softly. "I brought breakfast."

"You spoil me," Jasper said, stretching a bit and hugging Edward close.

"Nope. I'm just going to look after you today," Edward responded quietly with a smile. "We have the house to ourselves again."

Jasper's smile widened and he kissed Edward. "I like the way that sounds," he whispered.

"Good, because I have plans for us for today. First, breakfast." Edward kissed Jasper again and sat up, reaching for the breakfast tray.

Jasper propped himself up beside him, and they ate from the one plate Edward had prepared. When they finished, Edward shifted the tray away and prodded Jasper in the side. "Meet me downstairs with your shower stuff," he said in a low voice against Jasper's ear.

"What's wrong with your shower?" Jasper asked with a slight pout.

"Nothing," Edward answered with a shrug, fighting a grin. "Humor me?"

Jasper's pout turned into a smile and he nodded. "Alright. This once, and because it's still the holidays," he teased.

Edward laughed softly and kissed him quickly, gathering the tray and heading downstairs. He'd already mostly prepped the downstairs bathroom, laying out fresh towels and pulling out the bench that had been installed into the shower when he'd first moved home after his accident. Edward quickly put the dirty dishes into the sink, intending to clean up later, and rushed to the bathroom, wanting to get there before Jasper.

He got the shower running, letting the water warm and he had just kicked off his sleep pants when Jasper shut the door behind him, grinning as his eyes wandered over Edward's naked body. Edward crossed the short distance that separated them and took Jasper's bundle of clothes and toiletries from him. He set the clothes on the vanity and moved everything else into the shower enclosure. Without speaking, he slowly stripped Jasper out of his clothes, discarding his pajamas into a pile near the door.

Jasper didn't break the silence between them either, just smiled fondly and followed Edward's lead.

Edward took Jasper by the hand and led him into the shower, guiding him to the bench that he'd covered with a small towel and pressing him to sit with his back facing the shower head. Gently, he tipped Jasper's head back into the spray while he reached for the shampoo. He poured a generous amount into his palm and stepped behind Jasper, the spray of the shower beating down on him as he stood behind his lover and began to work at washing his hair.

He took his time, using his fingertips to massage Jasper's scalp while working the soap to the ends of his hair and back, before stepping out of the way and easing Jasper back under the spray to rinse him clean. He repeated the process, feeling Jasper melt under his fingertips as he continued to wash. Edward moved on, lathering his hands with body wash and reverently washing every inch of Jasper's skin. His touch wasn't meant to be arousing, but it didn't escape Edward's notice that Jasper was half hard before Edward moved around to wash the front side of his body.

Edward carefully knelt on the slippery floor of the shower stall and reached for more body wash. He soaped up his hands again and then reached first for Jasper's left foot, washing gently and thoroughly as he moved up his calf. He repeated the actions on the left, moving up to his thighs, his eyes locked on Jasper's, who was watching him through heavy lids. He eased Jasper under the spray again to rinse him clean before Edward slid forward a bit on his knees, coming to rest between Jasper's thighs. Edward ignored the temptation of Jasper's cock as he washed his lover's chest. His plan was to shave Jasper after the shower so he didn't bother washing his face, but he re-lathered his hands once more and carefully washed the bits of Jasper he'd ignored, feeling Jasper's erection grow in his hand as the soap was run over the length and back to his sack, down the back of his thighs.

He smiled softly as Jasper's breathing changed, hitching slightly, though Edward did nothing but make sure Jasper was clean before scooting back out to reach for the removable shower head and rinsing him down. When he was done, Edward kissed Jasper sweetly and took a couple minutes to clean himself up as well, before shutting off the shower and wrapping them both in towels.

Edward guided Jasper out of the shower and positioned him in front of the sink. No words were exchanged as he took out the materials he needed. Edward met Jasper's eyes as he began to lather the foam in his hands and found nothing but trust and love in his eyes before he smeared the foam over his cheeks and jaw. With tender and careful motions, Edward shaved Jasper, leaving him completely smooth and smelling of his usual musk after a gentle application of his aftershave. Edward didn't expect Jasper to offer to return the gesture; Jasper preferred to be clean shaven, where Edward kind of liked going around stubbled.

Before they dressed, Jasper kissed Edward, his palm sliding roughly against Edward's own stubble as Jasper cupped Edward's cheek to tug him just slightly closer, his tongue running over Edward's lips. The kiss deepened and Edward draped his arms over Jasper's shoulders, his fingers toying with the longer hair at the base of his neck; Jasper needed a haircut. Jasper hugged Edward close when they broke the kiss, the warmth of the room beginning to fade, forcing them to part and tug on comfortable clothes.

"Come on," Edward said quietly, the first words since he'd left Jasper in the bedroom after breakfast. "I have more plans for you today."

Jasper smiled and nodded, taking the hand Edward offered and followed him. Edward led him through the kitchen to the patio, shutting off the lights as they went. The rain was smattering against the patio cover as they stepped out, the low grey sky helping create the atmosphere Edward wanted with the lights and nest of blankets he'd carried out to the new patio chair. The world was otherwise quiet, the neighborhood hushed in the late morning, everyone else finding sanctuary out of the weather.

"Lay with me?" Edward asked quietly as they approached the new round lounger, feeling suddenly anxious about his plans. It had been a long time since he'd done anything overtly romantic like he'd done, and though he knew Jasper wouldn't reject him, he couldn't help but fear that he'd laugh at what Edward considered a slightly pathetic display. He hadn't put out any music, knowing Jasper liked to listen to the rain, but he hadn't done anything clichéd either, having really lacked time for anything over the top. He just wanted to lay with Jasper, hold him, and spend some quiet time together.

"Of course," Jasper answered.

The round chair wasn't big enough to allow them to both be horizontal, but Edward got comfortable against the slightly raised back, leaning against the pile of pillows and Jasper curled up with him, tangling their legs together and resting his head against Edward's shoulder. They shifted and squirmed to get comfortable under the blankets, laughing quietly as they both fought for them, eventually settling down, sealing out the damp and locking in their shared body heat under the electric blanket.

Jasper relaxed against Edward with a quiet sigh, and Edward smiled, wrapping his arms around him. The rain poured down around them, nothing new or special for Forks, but in sharing the moment with Jasper it became something else.

"Thank you," Edward said quietly.

Jasper didn't answer with words; he lifted one of Edward's hands from his chest and pressed a kiss to his palm.

They sat quietly for awhile, the soft sound of their breathing mingling with the rain and wind. One of them would shift occasionally, and they snuggled together, just enjoying each other's company and the storm. Gentle touches were exchanged, and lingering kisses on available skin.

It didn't take long for things to heat up and shirts were being stripped off under the cover of blankets to allow each other greater access to bare skin to touch, kiss, or nibble. There was laughter and quiet moans, but few words as they slowly wound each other up, encouraged by the rhythm of the storm building around them. They shifted against each other in their need to touch and have contact, and the pillows spilled over the edge of the bed as they wrestled off clothing and sought the best position for as much skin on skin contact as they could get. They continued to touch and tease, remaining under the cover of blankets though there was little chance of being caught, since the family was out for the day.

They settled, in a manner of speaking, with Edward's spine curling around the curve of the chair, resting on his left side, able to see the expanse of his parents' back yard over Jasper's shoulder.

Edward pulled Jasper close, the blonde's back to Edward's front, their clothing already discarded under the blankets. Edward nuzzled the tender skin at the juncture of Jasper's neck and shoulder while he reached for the supplies he'd carried down from their room earlier that morning. He felt Jasper shift against him as Edward's dick slid against Jasper's ass, and Jasper's legs spread wider on reflex.

"I love you," Edward said lowly into Jasper's ear, fingers of one hand making circles low on his belly, his knuckles brushing over Jasper's cock, causing soft whimpers to escape the other man.

"Love you, too," Jasper gasped, turning his head to capture Edward's lips in a kiss.

Edward's hand curled around Jasper's hip while the other fumbled with the lube and condoms as they kissed. He released Jasper's hip and rocked his own forward just a bit, feeling his lover respond. "Is this okay?" he whispered as his hands drifted to Jasper's ass, finally getting the lube open. His fingers ran lightly over the backs of his thighs.

"Fuck, yes," Jasper sighed.

Edward spread lube on his fingers and began to gently prep Jasper. He took his time, his free hand going back to Jasper's front, resuming his gentle massage of his lower belly, teasing a bit with 'random' brushes against his cock, feeling Jasper both relax and tense against him. When he added a second finger he began to drop kisses over the scarred expanse of Jasper's back and shoulders, burying his nose into the longish hair at the back of his skull, nuzzling along his jugular. Edward tried to remember how Jasper had taken great care to relax and prepare him the last time and wanted to make sure that Jasper felt the same way he had. Jasper was i_trusting_/i him with everything he had, and Edward couldn't fuck that up.

He pressed a kiss to the back of Jasper's neck as he reached for the condom, quickly tearing it open and rolling it on. He moaned quietly when he touched himself, adding lubricant to his sheathed erection. "Shift up, love," he urged Jasper, sliding down slightly to better align himself with Jasper's body.

As Jasper lifted his hips to move, Edward bent his left leg at the knee and slid his thigh under Jasper's hip. Jasper turned his head again and kissed Edward, his right hand falling back over their bodies to curl around Edward's hip and draw them closer.

"Patience, baby," Edward breathed against Jasper's lips, but he followed Jasper's unspoken command and slowly began to press himself into the blonde. He went slowly, pressing just the head of his cock into Jasper's opening, then backing out slightly, over and over until Jasper's body stretched to accommodate him, and Edward let out a shuddering sigh that raised goose bumps along Jasper's neck when he was fully inside Jasper. Jasper's hand tightened around his hip in response to Edward as he rocked his hips forward slightly with a quiet breathy moan of pleasure.

Edward mirrored Jasper's action and placed his hand on his hip, tugging him back as Jasper tugged Edward forward. Edward's left hand was cradling Jasper's head and as he wiggled his fingers, Jasper tipped his head back against Edward's shoulder, freeing his hand to roam over Jasper's body.

Slowly, Edward began to move. He rocked his hips back, then forward, the motions awkward at first the way they were positioned, but after a moment, Jasper began to move in counterpoint, and they established an easy slow lazy rhythm. Edward wanted to take his time and make it last.

Jasper's left arm came from under his chest and tangled in Edward's hair as they moved together, and Edward took advantage of the new line of flesh along Jasper's bicep to kiss and nuzzle.

"Fuck, baby," Edward groaned when Jasper pressed back into him and shifted position slightly, Jasper answering with a pleasured whimper. Edward raked his stubby nails down Jasper's chest, circled his belly button and followed the scant trail of hair down to his dick, where it stood hard and neglected. Edward gathered the pre-cum with his fingertips and used the natural lubricant to slide his hand down Jasper's length as they continued in their building rhythm as their lust grew. The sweat on their bodies allowed them to move easier against each other under the pile of blankets (mostly) keeping them concealed from wandering eyes.

Jasper made a noise low in his throat as Edward stroked him, all of the movements beginning to lose tempo slightly as things became more frenetic between them. Edward bit his lip momentarily, trying to find his cadence again but gave up as Jasper's hand released his hip and skimmed down and around the back of his thigh. The fingers of Jasper's other hand tightened in his hair, spurning Edward on further. Though this was only the second time they'd completely been together this way, Edward had no trouble reading Jasper's non-verbal cues; it seemed his lover was as quiet in his lovemaking as he could be in everything else, and as always, words seemed unneeded between them.

The hand Edward had around Jasper's hip moved lower and back and he cupped Jasper's sack in his palm, rolling gently. Jasper let loose another needy sound and captured Edward's lips once more. "Close, baby," Jasper gasped out against Edward's mouth.

Edward felt the familiar burn low in his belly as well as his body began to cry out for release, his breath coming in rapid gasps and his heart feeling like it was going to burst from his chest while his muscles burned from the exertion and strange position.

"Let go, lover," Edward coaxed Jasper softly through his heavy breathing. Jasper did and Edward followed a moment later, his orgasm crashing over him like a tidal wave, dragging him under for a moment. Jasper collapsed back into Edward, and they slumped against the back of the chair, Edward's arms somehow finding the strength to circle Jasper's waist as he nuzzled his face between Jasper's shoulder blades.

Jasper's hand returned to his hip and Edward felt his thumb rub small circles into his skin. Edward rested his cheek against Jasper's back as they burrowed back under the blankets. He wasn't ready to lose the connection he had with Jasper, and made no move to pull out of him as he held him close.

Quiet sniffles soon grabbed his attention and Edward cupped Jasper's cheek, concerned, and turned his head slowly toward him. "Are you alright?" he asked softly, thinking he'd somehow hurt Jasper, but there were no tears to be seen.

Jasper nodded, a hand emerging from the blankets to rub at his nose.

Edward kissed him softly. "C'mon," he said, regrettably slipping out of Jasper and sitting them both up. "I think you've spent enough time outside in the cold for a few days," he teased and kissed him again, trying not to feel guilty about dragging him out into the cold and damp after he'd spent hours in the cold on Christmas Eve. It wasn't enough to actually make him sick, Edward knew, but that didn't mean he needed to deal with being cold and sniffly to satisfy Edward's whims, either. "Let's go inside and snuggle where it's a bit warmer."

Jasper nodded and kissed him back. Edward tied off the condom after he'd removed it, and they fumbled under the blankets to get their clothes back on before wrapping up in the blankets and returning to the house. Edward gathered the remainder of the condoms and lube and shoved them into the pocket on his hoodie, in case they didn't get back outside before anyone else came home and decided to test out the chair. He started a fresh pot of coffee and heard Jasper moving around in the living room, and then he smelled smoke, and smiled; Jasper'd gotten the fire going.

He disposed of the condom and made a note to take the trash out before anyone else came home, fixed two cups of coffee, and shut off all the lights on his way through.

When Edward joined him in the living room, the tree lights had been switched on, and Edward found Jasper in one of the chairs, accepting his open armed invitation to join him with a smile. He let his cane fall to the floor beside the chair as he snuggled in with Jasper, unashamed to show how much he enjoyed it. Jasper laughed softly and hugged him close, kissing his temple.

"Thank you for this morning," Jasper said lowly in Edward's ear, his nose brushing the long hair that fell over the top of Edward's ear.

"Thank you for indulging me," Edward returned, and they both laughed softly. They remained curled up together in the chair, watching the fire and exchanging tender kisses and touches until their stomachs rumbled a reminder that they needed to eat.

"I'll make lunch," Jasper offered. "Why don't you pick a movie?"

"Okay," Edward agreed. He shifted to let Jasper up and accepted his hand to rise from the chair. Edward went over to his parents' movie collection and after browsing for a few moments, found nothing that appealed. He found the remote on top of the television and moved to the couch, flipping through the various movie channels until he came across something new on the pay per view channels that they'd not seen yet. He ordered the movie and settled back as it queued up, ready for them.

Jasper carried in a plate with two sandwiches and some of the raw veggies from the tray Esme had made for Christmas Eve, and two glasses of water balanced in his other hand. He settled down on the couch next to Edward after handing him the plate. "Do y'all have any Boxing day traditions?" he asked quietly as they got resituated, spreading a blanket over their laps, despite the warmth from the fire (and central heating).

Edward shook his head as he claimed one of the ham sandwiches. "Nope. Why?"

"I was thinking we could go out to the store after the movie and cook dinner?" Jasper suggested. "It appears that we've eaten Esme out of house and home," he teased. "The pantry's pretty bare, and there's not a lot of leftovers in the fridge."

Edward kissed him softly. "I think mom and Emma would really appreciate that. Got anything in mind?"

Jasper shrugged as he took his own sandwich from the plate. "I don't cook much, but I can follow a recipe. Soup and bread sounds really good to me, and we can make a lot of it and leave it simmering for whenever everyone gets home."

"We'll probably need to do a couple different kinds, but we could use the slow cooker for one," Edward said. "We'll sort through a cookbook after the movie?"

Jasper made an affirmative sound and Edward started the film. Once they'd finished eating, Jasper leaned against Edward, tucking himself against Edward's side, and Edward draped his arm around Jasper's shoulders.

After the movie (and considerable cuddling time), Edward carried the plate and glasses back to the kitchen and rummaged around for a couple of Esme's cookbooks. He returned to the living room with a slow cooker book and the classic red and white checkered Better Homes and Gardens he remembered from his childhood. The pages were worn and stained from use and Edward had considered replacing it with an updated version a couple of times, but realized that it likely held sentimental value to his mother. He handed the crock pot book to Jas and settled down with the other, flipping open to the soups tab.

Edward flipped through the pages and glanced at the options. "What are you thinking, Jas?"

"Something that uses the ham hock," he said, marking a few pages with his fingers. "Split pea or lentils. Though I think this winter squash could be good with the ham thrown in. You?"

"Hm," Edward thought out loud as he skimmed the pages again. "Minestrone," he decided. "It's easy and is better later, so we can cook it and put some of it away for everyone else while the other cooks?"

Jasper leaned over and kissed him lightly. "Good plan."

They scribbled out a list and went upstairs to change into real clothes (they'd both chosen to lay around in flannels) and shoes. Edward grabbed his keys and they both slipped wallets into their pockets and Jasper closed down the fire before they left.

The grocery store was nearly empty on the day after Christmas, making it easy for them to gather what they needed. Jasper decided on the winter squash and white bean recipe, deciding to leave the ham hock for Esme to freeze and use later. They strolled through the store and grabbed their ingredients, plus a few things to restock the fridge and Jasper got the items necessary to make a dump cake, something he said was his father's favorite dessert, with vanilla ice cream.

Jasper insisted on paying for the groceries, and Edward relented only because he knew it was important to Jasper to feel like he wasn't taking advantage of his family's hospitality, despite how often Edward had told him he was welcomed. They loaded up the groceries and headed back to the house.

The house was still quiet and empty when they returned. Edward expected his father and David to return ahead of everyone else, but since their golf game had likely been cancelled because of rain, Edward had no idea where they'd disappeared to for the day. Jasper unloaded the bags and sorted everything onto the counter while Edward stoked the fire back up and put on some music.

Edward and Jasper spent the next hour working together in the kitchen. Edward located his mother's huge slow cooker under the counter and set it up for Jasper before getting started on the minestrone he was going to make. They worked fairly slowly, neither of them really accustomed to cooking, though Edward felt pretty assured they couldn't really screw anything up. It took some time for Jasper to get the squash peeled and chopped, but once he figured out a method, it went smoothly. They teased and poked at each other as they moved around for the things they needed, and it was a different kind of relaxing for Edward. Though he was moving around, his mind was focused on something, and he found it an odd kind of meditation.

When they finished and had cleaned up, except for the pot on the stove and the slow cooker going on the counter, Edward heated up the last of the cider and they returned to the living room. This time, Edward relaxed against Jasper with a soft sigh, Jasper's quiet laugh rumbling under his ear against Jasper's chest.

"When are you seeing Dr. Card again?" Jasper asked softly after they'd been sitting for a few minutes.

"Wednesday," Edward answered. "Don't you have to go back next week to get your back checked?"

Jasper nodded. "Friday."

Edward laughed quietly. "We sound like a couple of old men, arranging our schedules around doctor's appointments."

Jasper chuckled. "I know." He kissed Edward's temple. "When do your meditation classes start?"

"After the new year," Edward answered with a sigh. "I had thought we could start sooner, but the instructor is starting a new group, and asked if we could join that one, to keep the other class on track."

"Okay," Jasper said with a nod. "Just let me know when they are, so I can adjust my office hours or whatever if I need to."

"Yes, dear," Edward said with a smirk, laughing when Jasper nudged him in the ribs. He elbowed Jasper back, and from there it kind of dissolved into an odd kind of foreplay, though they managed to keep their clothes on and, miraculously, stay on the couch.

They were laughing so hard Jasper had tears in his eyes and Edward was snorting, unable to catch his breath, when his father and uncle returned home.

"Have a good day, boys?" Carlisle asked, an amused smile on his face as he watched them frantically right their clothing from their wrestling match and try to control their laughter, which wasn't really working, Edward noted, as they both kept dissolving into embarrassingly girlish giggles as they bumped into each other (intentionally, on Edward's part at least). "Something smells good."

"We made soup," Edward explained through his laughter as Jasper kept trying to squirm away from him. "There's minestrone on the stove that's ready but needs greens and the cheese, and some stew in the cooker, that won't be ready for a couple hours yet."

"Esme and Emma will appreciate that," David said. "I'm sure Alice has walked their feet off today. I'll call Em and keep them from picking up take out," he said, fishing his phone from the clip on his waist and wandering into the kitchen.

Jasper succeeded in scooting out of Edward's reach and they managed to contain their laughter somewhat, Carlisle looking on and shaking his head, though Edward thought he saw something almost wistful in his father's expression.

"Plans for the evening?" Carlisle asked, falling into one of the armchairs.

Edward shook his head. "You're pretty much looking at it," he said, and Jasper burst out laughing again. Edward realized just how that sounded and blushed, his father's laughter mixing with Jasper's. Edward threw one of the throw pillows at Jasper's head.

"What I meant, was," Edward continued. "Just staying in and laying around." He rolled his eyes at the fresh wave of laughter that rolled through his father and lover. "Fine," he huffed. "I'm shutting up now."

Carlisle laughed at Edward's petulance, but Jasper managed to contain himself for a minute. He slid to Edward's side and kissed him softly in apology. "You have to realize how that all sounded after what they walked in on," he whispered.

On one hand, Edward was beyond relieved that Jasper felt comfortable enough with his family to be affectionate like that in front of his father, but he was still a bit irritated with their laughter at his expense. He playfully shoved Jasper away with a roll of his eyes.

"The girls are on their way back from Seattle," David said, coming back into the living room, clipping his phone back to his belt. "They just left, so they'll be a few hours."

Carlisle nodded as David sat in the other chair, stretching his legs out in front of him. "Sounds like we're on our own then. Son, Jasper, think you can keep your hands off each other long enough to watch a movie?"

Laughter rang out through the living room as Carlisle was pelted with pillows from both ends of the couch.

* * *

wiki apples to apples. It's a fantastic game that I play with my ESL students as a vocab/culture building exercise.

The dump cake recipe will be up on the blog.

Please check out fandomgivesback(dot)blogspot(dot)com. Support the fight against childhood cancer.

Now for the (semi) important stuff. There may be a lack of post next week. With the move and dealing with the crap that's come with it (lack of creativity, etc.), I've used up just about all of the chapters I had saved up. Depending on how things go this weekend while my family is out of town (giving me time and mental space to write), I may take next week off to buy myself a bit more time. We'll see how it goes. I'll post to the blog and twitter when I get things figured out.

In the meantime, check the blog for another teaser post, and as always, you readers rock my socks.


	30. Chapter 29: Caught in the Rain

As always, much love to Naelany and wishingforlove.

Please see my note at the end. It's not like the last one, promise. ^_^

* * *

The days following Christmas fell into a comfortable pattern for the inhabitants of the Cullen home. Mostly everyone hung around the house and relaxed. Couples broke off for quiet time together, but the family largely spent time as a group, knowing that after New Year's, everyone would be off to various holiday destinations.

Tuesday morning was much like the two previous; Esme and Emma made breakfast for those that were awake, leaving the rest to fend for themselves in cereal or leftovers. Jasper stumbled downstairs in search of caffeine around eight in the morning, just in time for fresh blueberry pancakes off the griddle. He ate and helped clean up, then went back upstairs to shower. Edward was where Jasper had left him, stretched out on his side, glasses perched on his nose as he read. He kissed Edward's upturned shoulder before digging out a clean pair of underwear and disappearing into the bathroom.

Jasper lingered under the hot water for as long as his conscience would let him, knowing there were others who would want the hot water. He dried off quickly in the bathroom and tugged on the clean boxers, tossing his dirty pjs into the hamper on his way out.

"You going to stay up here and read all day?" He asked Edward as he found jeans and a long sleeved t-shirt to pull on and tossed a pair of socks onto the bed.

Edward shrugged. "Probably just until I finish this," he answered as Jasper slid into his jeans and buttoned the fly.

Jasper perched on the edge of the bed, tugging on his shirt and then pulling on the socks before stamping his feet into the slippers Bella had made him for Christmas. He kissed Edward's shoulder again, then twisted a bit (pleased to find that the motion didn't hurt his back) to kiss his cheek. "Don't forget to come down and eat at some point, please."

"Yes dear," Edward teased, setting his book down for a moment to give Jasper a proper kiss.

Jasper kissed him back and stood. "Enjoy your book," he said sincerely. "I'll be downstairs."

"Hm." Edward said, already turning back to his novel.

Jasper laughed quietly as he let himself out of their bedroom and went back downstairs, his first goal a fresh cup of coffee. He had no plans for the day, and he honestly didn't mind that Edward was looking for some quiet time of his own. They'd been practically (and somewhat literally) in each other's back pocket for nearly a week, and they were by nature both fairly solitary and quiet people. It wasn't like Jasper would have turned down Edward's company if he'd offered it, but he was worried that too much time together they might burn out on each other, and they needed time to remember they were individuals with other relationships to nurture as well.

Though everyone was home, the house was quiet as Jasper settled down in the living room with his coffee and a new novel of alternative history. He was considering using one of the author's other books in his Civil War elective class spring semester. He read for a couple hours before getting up to stretch, and realized he hadn't seen Bella come upstairs yet that morning, despite Alice's bouncing around the house.

After using the bathroom, Jasper headed down to the basement, worried about Bella. She wasn't a morning person, but it wasn't like her to sleep until eleven in the morning. Especially while she was sharing a bed with Alice, who was an early riser most of the time.

"Bella, darlin'?" he asked into the dimly lit basement. There were two nightlights in the space providing just enough light to keep Jasper from falling over anything. It was chilly in the basement, which probably explained why the figure in the middle of the bed was balled up and wrapped tightly up in blankets.

She shifted, but didn't answer beyond a quiet whimper.

"Darlin', are you feeling okay?" He asked quietly as he perched as gently as possible on the bed, reaching out to rub her back lightly.

"No," she whispered. "Migraine."

Jasper shifted his gentle massage from her back to her neck, and then her scalp. His mama had suffered headaches for years, and she'd always found it comforting. Bella sighed softly and Jasper guessed that she probably did, too. "Do you need anything?" he asked softly.

"Tea?" Bella asked softly.

Jasper nodded. "Sure. Have you taken anything?" He continued lightly combing through her hair and gently running his fingers over her scalp.

"'M waiting for it to work," she whispered.

"Alright." He kissed the top of her head lightly. "Close your eyes. I'll be back in a few minutes."

"Thanks, Jazzy," she said on a soft sigh.

He rose as smoothly as he could, worried she was nauseous and quietly took the stairs back up. The electric kettle was back on its base and Jasper turned it on, knowing it wouldn't be long before it heated back up and rooted around for some decaffeinated tea, finding some peppermint in the cupboard that he thought might be nice, and prepared a mug for Bella.

On his way back downstairs he also grabbed a pancake leftover from breakfast, thinking it might be something bland enough she could eat, if her stomach was upset, and wrapped it in paper towels. He closed the basement door behind him, ensuring the room would remain mostly quiet and dark.

"Hey, Bells," he greeted her quietly as he slid onto the bed with her. She looked slightly less tense, but there were still lines and dark circles around her eyes. "Here," he handed her the mug when she reached for it.

"Thanks," she said, blowing across the top of the mug before taking a long drink and sighing softly. She remained curled up under the covers, and Jasper rested on top.

"Drugs workin' yet?" he asked quietly after a few minutes of silence.

"Yeah," she answered quietly after she finished her tea. Jasper lifted the empty mug from her hands.

"C'mere," he offered and she shifted up to rest on the pillow Jasper laid on his thigh. He stroked through her hair again lightly and watched as she relaxed and then slid into sleep. Jasper continued to finger-comb through her hair as she slept, until he dozed off as well, comfortable under her slight weight and the warmth of her body wrapped in the blankets.

Jasper woke from his light slumber when he felt the bed dip behind him.

"You know, I think I'm supposed to be jealous when I find my lover snuggled up with someone else," Edward's voice teased from behind him, his body warm along Jasper's other side. "Not the least of all when said person is a very beautiful woman."

"Hm." Jasper agreed with a sleepy grin. "And are you?" He felt Edward's arms wrap around his waist.

"No," Edward said quietly, resting his head against Jasper's shoulder, stretching his left arm across them to Bella. That one word sounded loaded to Jasper, but he couldn't quite grasp what it was before Edward moved on. "Everything alright?" he asked, his voice soft and worried.

"Migraine," Jasper answered quietly, sliding down a bit, kind of liking being sandwiched between the two of them. Until he'd spent time with both Edward and Bella, he hadn't realized how much he'd missed physical contact with people, and he enjoyed being able to be physically demonstrative with both of them. He watched as Edward played with a strand of her hair. "Did you finish your book?"

"Mm-hm," Edward responded, relaxing further against Jasper.

Jasper smiled softly and kissed Edward. Before Edward could respond, Bella bolted upright and made a dash for the half-bathroom in the basement, leaving a trail of blankets in her wake and slamming the door behind her. Jasper and Edward looked at each other, concerned and confused, but neither moved from the bed, giving her some privacy and space.

"I came down to see if you wanted to run a few errands with me. Mom and Emma need a few things for supper, and I volunteered to go to the store." Edward asked after a moment.

Jasper nodded. "Sure."

Bella emerged from the bathroom and moved to her basket of shower supplies and then gathered clean clothes.

"Feeling better, love?" Edward asked quietly.

"Hm?" she looked up, apparently not noticing that Edward had joined them. "Oh, a little," she said with a weak smile. "I'm just going to get cleaned up and come back down for a nap."

"Is there anything you need from the store?" Jasper offered. "We're going to pick up some things for Esme."

"Oh, uhm, yeah," she stammered, flushing pink. "Just…oh, hell." She dropped her things on the bed and ducked back into the bathroom. She came back a minute later and handed Jasper the flap off a cardboard box, not meeting his eyes. "If you don't mind?"

Her embarrassment was endearing and Jasper managed not to laugh as he took in the logo and then shoved the piece of the box into his pocket as a reference sample. "Not at all, sweetheart," he answered, tipping her chin up, and smiling softly. "It's enemy territory to be sure," he teased. "But I think we can handle a quick incursion." It wasn't the first time he'd been sent to purchase feminine products, though it had been over a decade.

She giggled, and Jasper felt Edward's smile in the kiss that was placed at the back of his neck.

"Anything else you need?" Edward asked, propping his chin on Jasper's shoulder.

"Peanut butter sandwich crackers," she answered. "Those cheap ones, with the 'cheese'," she made quote marks with her fingers "flavored crackers." She began to gather up her things again.

"Done," Edward declared, shifting off the bed and extending a hand to Jasper.

"Thank you," she said, her smile a bit stronger as she headed for the stairs, the boys following.

Jasper and Edward found their shoes, and Edward gathered his keys and wallet and they were off.

"What were you thinking when you came downstairs?" Jasper asked softly after they'd been in the car for a couple of minutes.

Edward looked over at him and smiled. "That you two looked adorable curled up together the way you were," he said honestly. "Why?"

Jasper shrugged one shoulder. "I just got the sense that there was a bit more to your statement about being jealous than you let on is all."

Edward nodded. "Not really. If anyone has a right to be jealous, I think it'd be you, love," he said. "You know how I feel about her."

Jasper smiled. "Yes, I do, and I'm not. I know you love her; I love her too," he said simply. "And even I can admit that she's a beautiful woman," he teased lightly. She was aesthetically beautiful in a somewhat unconventional way, Jasper supposed, but it was almost as if her unawareness of her beauty made her all the more appealing.

Edward glanced at him, keeping his attention on the busy road. "You're not jealous that I'm still attracted to her?"

"Are you planning on having sex with her without talking to me about it first?" Jasper surprised himself with the question.

"What?" Edward looked at him with a frown. "No. I mean," he spluttered to Jasper's amusement, despite the serious turn the conversation had made. "I'm not planning on having sex with her, period." He paused. "Wait. If I talked to you about it first?" he asked as they pulled into the parking lot.

Jasper took a moment, waiting until Edward had parked and shut off the car, turning awkwardly behind the wheel to look at him. He wasn't sure it was the best place for the conversation, but they were having it, and Jasper figured probably sooner was better. "You love her, Edward. You're sexually attracted to her. I know you love me," he said with a smile. "If she fulfills some desire in you that I can't provide, I'd rather it be Bella than a woman I don't know or care about. But if you hurt her, I'll hurt you," he threatened. Then he smiled. "All I ask is that you talk to me about it first," he said quietly.

Edward closed the small distance between them and kissed Jasper softly. "Jasper, how could you even think that you wouldn't be able to satisfy me?" he asked softly, a small frown causing lines to appear between his eyebrows. "I haven't done anything to make you think that, have I?"

"No, of course not," Jasper answered quickly. This was definitely not a conversation Jasper wanted to have in the car in the parking lot of the grocery store, but he supposed there was no going back. He sighed softly. "We've only been together for a few months, and intimate for less than that," he explained quietly. "And I know that in the past you had encounters with whomever fit the bill at the time," he said, wincing at the lack of tact he felt were inherent in those words. "I'm also aware that I lack a few bits of anatomy some of your past partners have been endowed with," he attempted to tease. "Edward, I know you love me," he repeated. "And I don't doubt that between the two of us, when and if we ever move off campus and have a life of our own, that we'll be able to keep each other fully satisfied in and out of the bedroom."

He sighed again and combed his fingers through his hair, echoing one of Edward's stress indicators. "Shit, I'm making a mess of this," he muttered. "What I guess I'm trying to say is that if you feel like you need to have sex with a woman, I'd trust you with Bella, because I love you both."

Edward's mouth twitched, and Jasper almost thought he was trying to contain a smile, but there was a dangerous glint in his green eyes Jasper wasn't sure how to interpret. "Jasper, are you trying to imply that I'm a giant man-whore?"

"What?" Jasper choked, leaning back. "No, not at all. I just…" he trailed off, mentally beating himself up for even broaching the topic. He sighed.

Edward's frown seemed etched in his face. "I love you, Jasper, and I'm a bit hurt that you'd think I'd take our relationship so lightly. How would you feel if I said you could go find another man to be with so long as you asked me about it first?" Edward asked rhetorically. He scrubbed his hands over his face, slipping his fingers under his glasses to rub at his eyes. "I love Bella, but I'm in love with you," he said quietly. "You're right; I've previously had the pleasure of being with whomever I wanted at the time. But that's not the case anymore. I don't know what's going to happen in the future, no one does, except maybe Alice and I'm not all that sure about her," he said in a rush. "I don't intend to seek sexual gratification outside our relationship," Edward explained in a quiet voice.

"Being bi-sexual doesn't mean that I can't commit to you or our relationship, it just means that I'm attracted to both genders," he said in a patient voice. "Or, rather, that it's not so much the gender, but the soul of the person that I'm attracted to, and their bits and bobs don't necessarily factor into the equation. I love _you_, Jas. I can't deny that part of me will always be attracted to and love Bella, hell, I don't know anyone that wouldn't be," he said. "And if in six months or a year she came to me, or you, we'd talk about it. But you're who I'm with, and you are who I metaphorically come home to every night. You're it for me, Jasper."

Edward had a curious expression on his face when he paused, and Jasper held his breath, waiting. "Can I ask you something?"

Jasper nodded, swallowing his feelings of stupidity and insecurity.

"Have you ever been with a woman?"

He shook his head. "No." He'd pretty much always known he was gay, and he'd never been interested in experimenting.

"Would you ever want to?" Edward asked.

The car was quiet for a long moment. "I don't know," Jasper confessed quietly. "I never wanted to before, and I'm not sure I could think of anyone now who could tempt me that way. Or who I'd trust not to hurt us both in the course of it." He shook his head again. "But it doesn't matter. I've never found myself attracted to a woman."

Edward nodded, looking thoughtful. "Not quite sure I agree with that last statement. Halloween?" He clarified at Jasper's confused look. "Anyway, like you said, it doesn't matter. It may someday, but for now… " he trailed off. "I'm with you, Jasper," he repeated quietly, a note of urgency in his voice. "I only want to be with you. I love Bella, but I'm not going to sleep with her, or anyone else but you. Okay?"

Jasper nodded tightly, feeling like a fool. He'd second guessed his partner's feelings about him and their relationship, and he was relieved it hadn't turned into a fight; he'd have deserved it if it had.

"Hey," Edward nudged him gently, and smiled softly when Jasper looked up. "We're okay. I'm not mad. I'm kinda glad we had this talk, because it could have been a big issue for us, down the road." He leaned forward and kissed Jasper's forehead, his lips lingering for a moment. "Come on," he said, reaching for the door handle. "They're going to send out a search party for us if we're not back soon."

Jasper managed a weak smile and let himself out of the car. He squeezed Edward's hand when his lover took it, and followed alongside him, meek and ashamed of himself as they collected the items on Esme's list. He had no idea what had even inspired him to bring the subject up. It hadn't previously entered his mind that Edward might want to sleep with a woman, let alone Bella, since they'd started being intimate around Thanksgiving. He'd not given Edward's bi-sexuality a thought since Alice had first given him hope that there was a chance for the two of them to have a relationship. He should have known that Edward had only been teasing when he'd found them back in Bella's bed that morning, and he shouldn't have pressed.

He was quiet for the rest of the trip, and Edward seemed to sense his internal struggle and give him the mental space he needed to work through his thoughts. Jasper fished the top of Bella's tampon box from his pocket and matched it up with the available selections, tossing the box into the cart amongst the vegetables. Edward remembered her crackers, and Jasper grabbed chocolate covered peanut butter pretzel sandwiches that he thought she might like as well.

The ride back to the house was silent, without even music playing. When they got back to the house, Jasper helped Edward carry in the bags, and left the house on foot to think after making sure he had his phone in his pocket.

He walked aimlessly for awhile, not really paying attention to where he was, trusting his innate sense of direction to guide him back to the Cullen home.

Jasper was confused, his thoughts awhirl over what he and Edward had discussed. It had almost sounded like Edward was encouraging him to want to explore a sexual encounter with a woman. But at thirty, Jasper had thought he was past experimenting to figure out his identity, sexual and otherwise. He'd smoked, partied, tried marijuana in high school, generally had his teenage rebellion as a teenager, short lived as it had been because the death of his dad and sister had forced him into the real world all too soon.

He reflected back to Halloween. When he'd awoken the morning after the party, he'd been cuddled up with something warm, and he supposed somewhere in the back of his mind he'd known it wasn't Edward, if only because the scent hadn't been quite right, though he'd known he was near. Jasper hadn't anticipated that a warm snuggly Bella would squirm around in his lap, bringing his morning wood to the forefront of his attention that morning. At the time, he hadn't really been conscious of it, having thought it was simply a matter of physiology and Edward's proximity.

It started to rain, and Jasper kept walking, tugging up the hood of his sweatshirt and shoving his hands deep into his jeans' pockets.

Was he attracted to Bella? He felt himself frown and ducked his head to keep the water out of his eyes as he continued to walk. He readily admitted she was beautiful. She was funny, smart, talented, and a wonderful teacher whom all of her students loved. She was the best friend he could ask for. But did he want to have sex with her? Instinctively he wanted to say no, but the thought was soon followed by the logic of 'if you haven't tried it, how do you know you don't like it,' that his mother had often tried on him with vegetables as a kid. He was pretty sure that approach didn't come to sexual preference, at least his own, because he'd never once felt like being with a woman. He'd feigned appropriate interest while he was in the service to blend in, but Bella was nothing like the enhanced women in the magazines and clubs his mates had shared with him or dragged him to.

Jasper sighed, pausing in his walk and turning his face up to the rain for a moment. He loved Edward; he was in love with Edward. He only wanted Edward. Or so he'd thought.

He wasn't getting anywhere at putting his thoughts down, and he was only growing more confused the longer he walked and let his thoughts circle. Jasper knew he wasn't going to resolve anything on his own, especially not without getting some distance from things, and he told himself to just put it out of his mind for awhile. He hadn't irrevocably changed anything in his relationship with Edward, and he knew that Edward was okay with him showing physical affection to Bella or other members of the family (though it was mostly Bella), so nothing would have to change on that front either. Jasper tried to tell himself that nothing had to become awkward; he just needed to let it sort itself out, providing it didn't fuck up his relationships with everyone.

With another sigh he turned around and started the walk back, taking in the neighborhood around him. He had no idea how far he'd gone, but he was clearly out of the more affluent neighborhood the Cullens lived in. The lawns were shabbier, the houses smaller, though nearly all were still lit up with Christmas lights.

Jasper's phone vibrated in his pocket and he pulled it out, hitting the right buttons to open the text message from Edward.

_Pls come home. been raining 4 while. ILU_

He sent back a message that he was on his way, and picked up his pace a bit, feeling his clothes begin to stick to his skin as he was soaked through. With the increased exertion he began to feel like he was steaming in his damp clothes, his body heat warming them from the inside, making him feel sticky and cold and miserable.

Twenty minutes later he was on the front porch of the Cullen home, soaked through and beginning to shiver. Edward was waiting for him, looking anxious and worried, an all but spent cigarette dangling from between his fingers, a stack of towels on the dry step next to him. Jasper cursed himself again for being a fool and let Edward help him strip out of his sodden clothing, leaving everything in heap on the step while he was bundled into the towels and led inside to the downstairs shower. Not a word was exchanged between them.

Edward kissed him lightly before Jasper stepped into the shower, the hot water a shock to his cold damp skin, but welcomed after a moment. Over the sound of the water, Jasper heard the door open and close. He took his time, waiting until he'd stopped feeling chilled through to shut off the water and wrap in another set of dry towels. He found clothes waiting for him; his own sweatpants and one of Edward's t-shirts and hoodies, next to his cowboy boot house slippers from Bella. He scrubbed his hair dry with a towel before dressing, and when he emerged, he found Edward waiting in the hall, looking sad and worried. Jasper took the mug he was offered and inhaled the steam from Esme's chicken soup, then let Edward take his hand and guide him not upstairs to their room, as he'd expected, but down into the basement.

Bella looked up when they reached the bottom of the steps. She had a bit more color in her face, though she still looked tired. The room was mostly dark, save a small lamp on the chest of drawers next to the bed, and a light colored piece of yarn was laid across her lap where she lounged on the bed.

Edward guided Jasper to the bed, kissed the top of his head, and went back to the stairs, his footsteps fading as he treaded up.

"You're an idiot," Bella said softly, shoving him lightly on the shoulder. He managed to avoid sloshing soup over the rim of the cup.

He only nodded. He knew full well he was acting foolishly.

"Oh, sweetheart," she sighed. She laid her work to one side and cuddled up to him, wrapping her small arms around his waist, laying her head on his shoulder. "He loves you, and he's not mad. He didn't tell me what you talked about," she said before Jasper could think to ask. "But he said you seemed shaken up by it and that you'd needed some time to process. You couldn't have done that here where it was dry and warm?"

He shrugged. He hadn't thought about it, really. He'd needed to be alone, and there'd just been too many people in the house for him to feel like he'd have any real privacy. Besides, walking or running had always helped him sort through his thoughts before.

"Okay," she said with a half smile. "I was worried, but I'm glad you're home and alright. Drink your lunch," she said, nudging him in the ribs lightly.

He did as he was told, sipping from the mug and watching Bella's hands as she worked with the yarn. He felt himself dozing off after he finished the soup. The mug was lifted from his hands and he was gently urged down into the bed. "Sleep, Jazzy," Bella's voice urged him as gentle fingers toyed with his hair and warm lips pressed against his cheek.

When Jasper woke, he found his head more or less in Edward's lap and he was curled in on himself, a position Jasper didn't often sleep in, with his back rounded and his knees tucked up. It was a defensive posture, he knew, and he wondered if he'd been protecting himself or others while he slept. He couldn't help but lean into the feeling of strong fingers running through his hair, feeling both calmed and comforted by the touch and he relaxed minutely, the tension leaving the muscles of his legs, though his back remained tight and tense.

He heard a feminine giggle behind him. "He's like a big cat," Bella mused softly, and Jasper felt more than heard Edward's answering chuckle.

"Sometimes," Edward agreed in a whisper. "Hey, Jas."

"Hi," he answered softly, wincing at the hoarseness of his voice and the scratchy feeling even that one sound produced. He swallowed roughly.

"Are you okay?" Edward asked.

Jasper wasn't sure how to respond to that on many levels, so he shrugged best he could, making no effort to move out of his protective curl or Edward's embrace. He felt drained, emotionally and physically, and he still hadn't really figured anything out. His back was also throbbing, a result of his impromptu walk, Jasper assumed, but he embraced the pain momentarily, letting it become the focus of his thoughts.

"Do you want us to leave you alone?" Bella asked from behind him, her small hand warm on his back where his sweatshirt had ridden up.

"No," he answered softly. "Please." He had screwed up by walking away earlier and pulling away from Edward instead of trying to talk to him about things. Surely if anyone could understand the thoughts he was currently wrestling with it would be Edward, who would have had to have come to terms with his own sexuality somehow. But he'd been alone enough in his life with big problems to deal with. In the overall scheme, it seemed somewhat trivial, though Jasper knew that it wasn't. For the moment, he just wanted to be reminded that Edward loved him and would support him and the rest would sort itself out.

Jasper felt Edward's breath ghost across his ear as he leaned in close and spoke softly. "Relax, baby," he said tenderly. "We're not going anywhere. I think I kind of dropped a bomb into your life earlier, and I'm not going to leave you to deal with it alone. When you're ready, I'm here." He kissed the top of Jasper's head. "I love you."

Though he didn't uncurl, he did relax slightly. "Love you, too," he said softly. Edward resumed playing with his hair and Jasper fell quiet once more, soaking up the feelings of love and affection Bella and Edward were physically giving him, letting them quiet his mind for the time being. He drifted and dozed, Bella and Edward's voices washing over him. He never quite fell back into true sleep, the pain in his back keeping him from true rest, but he felt himself slowly relax by degrees as he focused on listening to the sounds of their voices and not his own thoughts.

They remained curled up in Bella and Alice's bed until Esme called them for supper. Jasper was quiet throughout the meal, leaving conversation to everyone else. Edward never let him drift too far into his own thoughts, however; he was always right there with a gentle touch to pull him back. No one else noticed, or at least didn't say anything about the change in Jasper's mood and he did the best he could to lock it down.

After dinner, Jasper excused himself, saying he wasn't feeling well and took himself slowly upstairs to the bedroom he was sharing with Edward. He'd developed a nagging headache and still felt drained. He took the prescription strength ibuprofen with a large glass of water in the bathroom and shuffled back into the bedroom. Jasper shut the lights off and crawled into Edward's bed with a sigh, turning onto his stomach and wrapping his arms around one of Edward's pillows. He buried his nose into the fabric to capture his scent while he waited for the painkillers to kick in and reduce the tension and strain he felt in his back. He had a feeling he wouldn't be hearing good news when he saw the doctor on Friday.

He felt Edward join him on the bed sometime later, though he was careful to not crowd Jasper's space too much. But Jasper was feeling chilled again and he shifted himself closer to soak up a bit of Edward's body heat and drifted back off into a restless slumber.

At some point, he felt cool fingers on his cheek and he leaned into them, feeling overly warm before he faded back to sleep.

"Jasper, love wake up for a moment," Edward urged him quietly with a gentle shake of his shoulder.

"Hm?" Jasper blinked his eyes open. He felt sapped of all energy, shaky and chilled, and Edward had a soft concerned expression on his face.

"Here, take these," he said, offering Jasper two round tablets which he took along with most of the bottle of water he was offered. Edward's fingers combed through his hair when he laid back down. "You're running a low fever," Edward counseled quietly. "It's no surprise really, with all the emotional upset of the last week, plus how often you keep ending up out in the cold," he teased. "Your body's trying to deal with the stress the only way it can."

Jasper found a weak smile for him. At least that explained why he felt like crap.

Edward kissed his temple as Jasper shifted, resting his head in Edward's lap. "Get some rest, baby," he said tenderly. "Hopefully you'll feel better in the morning."

"Thanks," Jasper whispered.

Edward woke him again a few hours later and when Jasper winced in pain when he rolled over to sit up, Edward fed him the higher dose of ibuprofen and made him drink a whole bottle of water before he'd let Jasper go back to sleep.

When Jasper woke again the next morning the space next to him in the bed was empty, though still held a trace of Edward's warmth. The headache he'd gone to bed with still lingered, though his back didn't ache as much as it had when he'd laid down. He didn't feel quite all there, though, and lingered under the covers with his eyes closed, listening to the house around him.

"Hey love," Edward's voice woke him again, as did the weight of Edward settling onto the bed. "How do you feel?"

"I've been better," he answered, his voice raspy and tired.

Edward kissed his forehead and frowned. "You're still warm," he muttered, then sighed. "I'm leaving in a few minutes for my appointment, do you need anything?"

"Just more water and something for the headache," he answered softly.

Edward ran his hand through Jasper's hair, brushing it off his forehead and lingering for a moment. "I'll be right back."

He rose and Jasper curled up more on his side and waited. Edward was back in a few moments with a bottle of water and a bottle of Advil, handing Jasper two tablets and placing the bottle back on the night stand.

"Emmett and I need to get some of the things picked up for the New Year's party tonight, since apparently Alice couldn't have given us the list while we were out yesterday" Edward snarked quietly. "Do you mind if I go?"

Jasper shook his head slowly, digging an arm out from under the blankets to touch Edward's hand lightly. "No, you should go. You haven't been able to spend much brotherly bonding time together lately." He'd nearly forgotten about it being New Year's Eve.

Edward gave him a small smile and kissed him lightly again. "Take it easy today, okay?"

Jasper nodded. "I will. I love you."

"Love you too. We'll talk when I get back? We should have some time before Alice calls everyone together for the festivities. We'll probably need to make an appearance, but we don't have to stay long, if you don't feel up to it."

"Yes, I'd like to talk" Jasper said quietly. He'd have time to prepare for whatever news Edward was going to bring back from his appointment with Dr. Card and make some headway into dealing with his own mess of thoughts. "We'll figure out about the party later."

"Okay." Edward rose and bent to kiss Jasper's forehead again. "I'll see you later."

"Mm-hm," Jasper hummed, already snuggling back down into the warm mass of blankets.

He dozed on and off for most of the morning, waking often to the door closing after someone had apparently checked on him. His fever broke around noon, at which point he decided it was time to shower and find something light to eat, though he wasn't really hungry. He took something for the headache after he brushed his teeth.

Esme fed him toast with jam and warm lemon tea to soothe his still scratchy throat, and Jasper found himself in the music room after he ate. It kept him out of the way of Esme's snack making, and kept him from being put to work by Alice. He took a fresh cup of tea with him and pulled out his guitar, playing idly for awhile, not really consciously choosing any particular tune. When he felt slightly calmer, he went back upstairs, preferring the quiet refuge of the bedroom and Edward's couch. He curled up with another cup of tea and eventually dozed off again over a book, not waking until Edward returned home later that afternoon.

* * *

Ninapolitan, lolashoes, and tby789 have organized the fandom gives back to support Alex's Lemonade stand. I've donated several items in the hand-made section for their fundraising auction, but there're tons of other artists and authors putting themselves up on the block. Please check out my blog for links, or look for them on twitter fandomgivesback

I've also donated four items for auction for Support Stacie's I'll be Homemade for Christmas auction. One auction is "Esme's" hat, scarf, and glove set, and another is "Rose's" scarf from ch. 27. Again, links are on my blog.

And, just one more thing. Wednesday is Veterans Day here in the States. I'll be doing a celebration here in my county. Please consider some way to celebrate and thank a Veteran this week. ^_^

As always, readers, you brighten my day every time I get a review. Writing seems to be running smoothly again, so look for a chapter next Tuesday, and hopefully weekly again for awhile.


	31. Chapter 30: Miniature Disasters

thanks as always to Naelany and wishingforlove for their support.

* * *

He never should have let Jasper walk out of the house Tuesday morning. Edward mentally berated himself as he drove to the hospital and Dr. Card's office. He should have known Jasper would have needed space to work through everything they'd talked about, and he should have led him upstairs to the bedroom and not turned his back for Jasper to escape out into the weather yet again.

Edward ran his hands through his hair with a frustrated sigh. He wasn't upset with Jasper; they would have needed to have had that conversation sooner or later, and while the setting (and timing) wasn't ideal, Edward had wanted to put any of Jasper's fears or insecurities at rest. But in doing so, he'd implied some things that Jasper may not have ever truly considered before, and it wasn't until Edward had gone to deliver Bella's things that he'd realized Jasper had left the house, putting physical as well as the already mental space between them.

_Edward gathered Bella's items from the pile on the counter. "Hey, Jas," he said, turning to find no one behind him, and hearing the sound of the front door latching shut. "Fuck," he muttered, letting out a heavy breath through his nose and closing his eyes for a moment. He didn't follow; apparently Jasper wanted to be alone._

_He continued down to the basement, going back over their conversation in his head. _

"_Hi, love," Edward greeted Bella. She'd showered and changed, but the room was still mostly dark and quiet. "Feeling better?"_

"_Yes," she answered with a small smile. _

_Edward handed her the crackers and pretzel sandwiches and carried the tampons into the bathroom, leaving them on the counter._

_Bella held up the bag of pretzels with a questioning look._

"_Jasper thought you might like them. Peanut butter and chocolate," he answered, joining her on the bed._

"_Is he upstairs?" Bella asked, shifting over to lean on him, leaving her treats laying on the bed. _

_He shook his head. "He went for a walk," he said quietly, looking down at the blanket under him, tracing his fingers over the pattern._

"_What happened?" Bella asked, taking his hand. "Did you fight?"_

"_No," Edward answered, scrubbing his other hand through his hair. "We were talking, and I think I said some things that he hadn't really considered before. He was distant in the store and on the way home, and I think he just needs some time to work through what I said." At least, that's what he hoped._

"_Is he okay?"_

_Edward shrugged. "He seemed shaken up by whatever started running through his head. But you know how he can be; when something bothers him he gets all quiet and withdrawn and tries to deal with it. I think walking helps him focus."_

_Bella nodded. They were quiet for a few minutes, Edward again tracing patterns on the blanket and looking down. "Do you want to talk about it?" she asked quietly._

_He offered her a small smile. "Not yet, but thanks. I want to talk to him first."_

_Bella nodded again and said a quiet okay before cuddling up against him. They sat quietly for awhile until Bella got up to use the bathroom, and Edward wandered back upstairs to find that it had started raining. He went into the kitchen and sat at the bar, watching the rain out the window while Esme and Emma bustled around. After half an hour he grew anxious and sent Jasper a text._

He should have realized that the question about a woman, after their conversation about his relationship with Bella would send Jasper's thoughts into a tailspin, especially when he'd outright said that if Bella wanted to sleep with either one of them he'd consider it. He'd found it somewhat surprising that Jasper had never experimented with his sexuality, but then, Edward supposed, most people probably didn't, having set their orientation in one direction and not varying from the path they (or society or family) laid out for themselves. Unlike Edward, who had experimented even in high school with both genders, having found himself aroused equally by both male and female classmates physically. It wasn't really until he was in university that he'd really begun to sort things out for himself and realized that it wasn't necessarily the genitalia, but the person within that he wanted to be intimate with. Even with his casual hookups of his Orchestra days, he'd always had some kind of connection with his partner.

Edward pulled into the hospital parking lot and found a spot closest to the entrance near Dr. Card's office. He hoped Jasper realized that he could talk to Edward about any and everything, and they'd be able to work through it together. But it was going to take Jasper to decide he wanted that; Edward wasn't going to force him into a conversation he wasn't ready for, and based on the way the previous evening had passed, he wasn't sure Jasper had sorted anything out for himself, yet.

He sighed again, making his way to his doctor's office. He'd taken Jasper to Bella after he'd showered off his walk in the rain, not wanting Jasper to isolate himself from her in the wake of their conversation. Edward had also wanted Jasper to know that he was cared for, and the best way to do that, Edward had thought, was to surround him with those he was most comfortable with and close to, being himself and Bella. It seemed to work, Jasper relaxing slowly throughout the afternoon while Bella and Edward had held him. Though he'd remained closed off with everyone through dinner, he responded when Edward touched him, and Edward had understood he was just trying to keep his feelings from seeping out and being super obvious to everyone.

Jasper had been restless all night, tossing and turning through the low-grade fever that had Edward worried, but not overly so. His father had said to keep Jasper hydrated and give him something to try to bring it down, but he'd mostly just have to ride it out, with as mild as it was. It hurt Edward to see him so uncomfortable, especially when Edward felt responsible for his state. Esme had promised to check on Jasper while Edward was out, and Carlisle had told him not to worry overmuch, that Jasper had been under a lot of emotional stress through the holidays and that the fever was a reminder for him to slow down and take care of himself and "to stop being a damned fool and rushing out into the elements all the damn time." Edward hadn't quite relayed the words as a direct quote from his father.

When he reached Dr. Card's office he took a deep breath and pushed thoughts of Jasper reluctantly aside before he approached the assistant at the front desk and checked in for his appointment. He took a seat in one of the chairs and idly spun his cane between his knees while he waited to be called, trying to shift his focus to himself for the time being.

He wasn't waiting long before Dr. Card's nurse called him back, took all the usual readings and left him seated on the exam bed, cooling his heels for another couple of minutes.

"Hello, Edward," Dr. Card greeted him, closing the door behind him and hooking a stool with his foot. "How're you doing?"

"Pretty well, actually," Edward admitted. It was true, physically at least.

"That's good to hear." Dr. Card flipped open Edward's file. "So, Jane had a fairly positive report about your progress so far in therapy. How do you feel like it's going?"

"Good," Edward agreed. "She's great to work with and really seems to understand my goals without pushing me so far that I get frustrated with myself. It's been a month and I'm already noticing some progress, and Jasper's mentioned that I'm moving differently than I used to."

"Jasper?" Dr. Card asked with a frown.

"My partner," Edward clarified, remembering that he hadn't told Dr. Card his name when he'd seen him over Thanksgiving break.

"Ah, that's right. How's your relationship?"

"Solid," Edward answered. It was true for the most part. "We've only been together a few months, so it's new, but we have a good relationship."

Dr. Card hummed and nodded. "He's the one you talked about helping you over the Thanksgiving holiday?"

Edward nodded.

"I take it he's supportive, then?"

Edward nodded again. "Very." He knew it was Dr. Card's job to help in all facets of his health, but sometimes he found the random probing into his personal life annoying. "He doesn't push, but he's very supportive. It's been a bit difficult for him physically lately due to some injuries he sustained after some students pulled a prank on him right before finals, but we're working through it. We're going to be going to a beginning meditation class after the New Year, and he's helping me keep up with the pain journal you requested. Speaking of…" Edward pulled a small Moleskine notebook from his back pocket and handed it over.

Dr. Card flipped through it quickly. "I'm proud of you for finally taking some responsibility in this, Edward," he said as he lingered over a couple of entries. He closed the notebook and handed it back. "How's the pain been lately?"

"Not too bad. I think the muscle strain has been mostly resolved," he said. "I don't feel it in my lower back or hip as much, and the Celebrex seems to be managing the worst of the pain."

"Have you tried scaling back to an otc dose?" Dr. Card asked.

Edward shook his head. "No, not yet."

"Hm." Dr. Card made a note. "Okay, it's not really a problem, I had just figured that, given your past history with long term medication, you'd have tried to downscale as quickly as possible. You should have a couple of refills, I believe?"

Edward understood what he was saying. "I think the PT is really working this time, which is making it easier to keep up with the medication. Between the two, I'm in considerably less pain than I was used to, and I have to admit, it's kind of nice," he said with a smile. "Yes, I have a couple of refills left. Would you like me to try an over the counter dose?"

"No, let's stick with the prescription for now. After you get into the regular meditation practice again we'll see how you're doing. For now, I'm just pleased that you're finding some improvement."

From there the conversation turned back to his PT and general health, and fifteen minutes later Edward was back in his car on his way home.

Before he collected Emmett to go do Alice's bidding (it was a small family party, and though they'd go pretty much all night, what could she possibly need?), he went upstairs to check on Jasper. He was still dozing, tangled in the blankets, a light pink stain across his cheeks. Edward kissed him softly and went in search of his brother.

Apparently Alice had been aware that Bella would be out of commission (she still wasn't feeling well that morning) and unable to make a large dessert, so she'd ordered a sheet cake from the grocery store. Emmett and Edward were handed a list and sent on their way. They elected to take the SUV the Brandons had rented.

"Everything cool, bro?" Emmett asked as he drove.

Edward nodded. "Yeah, Em," he answered.

"You've been quiet. Both of you have," Emmett pointed out.

"We're okay. We just need to sort through a few things when Jas is feeling better," Edward explained.

"Anything I can help with?" Emmett was sincere.

"Thanks, but no," Edward said with a laugh. "Not that you're not a great help at sorting things out, but this is a bit…delicate." Edward sure as fuck didn't want to talk about Jasper's sexuality with his older brother. "How're things with you and Rosalie? Ready to go present her as your fiancé to her family?"

"Hells yeah," Emmett answered with a bright grin. "I managed to convince her to let it be a surprise, so when she talked to them on Christmas, she didn't let anything slip."

Emmett's excitement was contagious and Edward felt his spirits lift. "When are you leaving?"

"So eager to be rid of us, little brother?" Emmett teased. "We're going on Sunday evening and we'll be back next Sunday. We're visiting her parents in upstate, but we'll be spending the weekend in the city for some sightseeing and shopping."

"Sounds like fun." It really did, and Edward couldn't wait for his and Jasper's weekend away.

"When are you two headed for California?" Emmett asked as he found a parking space at the grocery store.

"Dunno," Edward answered. "We haven't picked a date, but probably after you get back so we can enjoy the peace and quiet while mom and dad are gone, too," Edward teased.

Their parents were leaving Saturday afternoon for their two week trip to their island retreat. Alice was going with her parents for a week, a last minute decision, meaning Edward and Jasper would be alone with Bella in the house for a week. They'd hang out together, but Edward was also looking forward to some quiet. He loved his family, but he'd gotten used to living on his own in the dorms that sometimes they got a bit overbearing.

Emmett smacked his shoulder. "Don't forget Bella's gonna be there, too, so you can't walk around naked whenever you feel like."

Edward laughed at his brother's teasing and hit him back as they got out of the car to gather everything on Alice's list.

The plan for the evening was to hang around and play as a family. Emmett would bring his TV from his bedroom downstairs to hook up his game console while the big TV was tuned to Dick Clark, despite Alice and Bella's complaints that he got cheesier every year, and Edward's that the music got worse and worse. The new cribbage board would be making a first appearance on the poker table that would be brought up from the basement for the occasion. The family would spend the evening eating and playing and being together, plenty of champagne on hand for midnight and other libations to keep the party going until late. It wasn't unusual for 'the kids' to stay up until dawn and sleep most of the next day while 'the parents' enjoyed a leisurely day.

Esme had already been preparing snacks when they'd left, but there was still plenty for Emmett and Edward to pick up. They got the cake and ice cream as ordered, located corn and tortilla chips to go along with the salsa, guacamole, and chili cheese dip (made of course from Esme's homemade chili). Bella had asked them to pick up corn chex cereal, powdered sugar, and chocolate chips to make something she called Puppy Chow. The list seemed to go on, but they found everything eventually and headed for the check out.

After the grocery store they had to stop at the party supply store for the balloons and confetti Alice ordered, along with party hats and noise makers, and everything else to ring in the New Year.

Their final stop was the liquor store, since they couldn't buy any hard alcohol at the grocery store.

Esme greeted him with a kiss on the cheek when they returned home and he delivered his one bag to the kitchen counter. "Thank you, sweetheart." He turned back to go out for another, but his mom stopped him with a light touch on his arm. "Let Emmett get them," she suggested, while Emmett settled his bags next to Edward's.

Edward nodded, shifting his weight to lean on the counter. "What's up, mom?" he asked as Emmett ducked back out.

"Is everything alright between you and Jasper?" she asked quietly, beginning to unload the bags and organize the contents on the counter.

"Yes. Why?" He frowned. He loved that his family was so sensitive to their moods, and he was trying not to find it overbearing that they wanted to make sure everything was alright.

"He's seemed very closed off since you guys went out yesterday," she answered. "He came down awhile ago and barely said two words, then went and played in the music nook for awhile." She turned to him, a soft frown marring her face. "Did you fight?"

"No," Edward said on a sigh. "It was a misunderstanding, and I think I shook up his worldview a bit more than I should have, but it wasn't on purpose." He ran his fingers through his hair. "We're okay, I promise," he assured her, moving to kiss her on the cheek. "Did he eat?" He asked, thinking he'd take something up with him.

Esme nodded. "It looked like his fever broke; his eyes didn't look so bright. I made him some toast and tea. There's still hot water on," she said with a wave to the kettle. "He went back up about an hour ago."

"Thanks, mom," Edward said softly, pulling down two mugs and rifling through the contents of the cabinet holding tea, coffee, and anything else they could want. After asking his mom what Jasper had been drinking, he dropped a lemon tea bag into a clean mug, then snagged a bag of green tea for himself. He poured the hot water, stole a few cookies from the pantry, and carried everything upstairs.

Jasper was stretched out on the couch in Edward's room, an open book in his lap and an empty mug at his feet. The flush of color was gone from his cheeks, and he'd showered (Edward guessed) and changed into his favorite jeans and one of Edward's knit sweaters, and stuck his Christmas present from Bella onto his feet.

Edward set the cups and cookies on the floor and slipped the book from Jasper's hand, marking the page before laying it aside. Jasper didn't stir until Edward joined him on the couch, lifting his legs to slip underneath.

"Hm," Jasper murmured, blinking his eyes open. "Hey, baby," he said quietly. His voice sounded rough and his accent was a bit thick, but Edward smiled at the clear look in his blue eyes.

"Hi, love. Feeling better?" Edward asked as Jasper shifted, sliding his legs off Edward's lap so he could sit up.

"Yeah," Jasper answered after a yawn. He stretched, then turned to face Edward, tucking one leg under himself. "How was it with Dr. Card?"

Edward reached for the cups he'd set on the floor and passed one over to Jasper, balancing the cookies on his thigh. "It went fine. He was happy to hear that I'm keeping up with the prescribed regimen and he wants to see me the first part of February after the meditation classes start. I'm supposed to keep up with the painkiller I'm on. Basically, everything seems to be working and healing up fine. If the PT works, hopefully I'll be okay for awhile. There's always going to be some pain, though, and I can cope, so long as I can stay off the narcotics," Edward said.

"That's great news," Jasper said. "I'm glad it's working for you."

Edward smiled. "Me too." He leaned in closer and kissed Jasper. "Thanks for being here with me through this."

"Nowhere I'd rather be," Jasper responded, kissing him back.

Edward offered Jasper a cookie, and wasn't surprised when he declined. There was a tightness around his eyes that made Edward think he wasn't feeling quite as well as he let on, but Edward didn't push. "Can we talk about yesterday?" He asked after a moment and a cookie of his own.

Jasper nodded. "I'm sorry I ran off. I just needed some space to think, and I've always done that better while I was moving."

"I know," Edward assured him. "But that's not really what I meant."

Jasper sighed. "I know," he breathed, echoing Edward.

Edward put his cup on the floor and turned to face Jasper, holding out his hand and inviting Jasper to lay with him on the couch. Jasper shifted, taking the offered hand and laying between Edward's legs, his head on Edward's chest, legs outstretched.

"What were you thinking about, while you were out walking?" Edward asked, having a feeling he needed to be the one to start the conversation.

Jasper relaxed against him. "Mostly about what we had talked about in the car. Bella, you, my past experiences."

Edward hummed quietly. "Figure anything out?"

"Not really," Jasper admitted. "Mostly just found myself with more questions than I want and decided to just let things fall out where they will."

"Is there anything I can help you work through?" Edward offered, hugging Jasper with arms around his waist and resting his chin on Jasper's shoulder.

"I don't know," Jasper sighed. "I'm just really confused, Edward. You've made me think about things that I've never considered before, and I feel like I'm too old to be going through a period of self-discovery."

Edward smiled softly and kissed Jasper's neck behind his ear. "Talk to me, baby," he encouraged in a low voice.

Jasper sighed again, and Edward tried to soothe him physically the best way he could, with gentle touches until he started speaking.

"I've never really questioned my sexuality," Jasper started quietly. "As soon as I was old enough to realize that I was only attracted to other boys, I accepted it. I came out quietly to my parents and sister when I was fifteen, but didn't really start seeing anyone until I was in high school the following year. I think I've told you we were in a fairly liberal part of Texas, and most of the boys I saw, until Darryl, went to other schools. My parents never encouraged me to try anything different and I had no interest in experimenting with girls, outside of what I'd done with magazines when I'd been trying to figure out what the hell was going on with my body when I was going through the early stages of puberty."

Edward couldn't help but chuckle softly at that; he remembered his frustrations when he'd been in his early teens, compounded, he'd come to understand, by his mutual attraction for girls and boys. "Been there," he mused quietly, and he heard a soft laugh from Jasper.

"When I was in the Corps, in Basic at least, I couldn't avoid going out with the guys to strip clubs, or the pass around of dirty magazines," Jasper continued. "The magazines were easier to deal with, since I could just ignore them and didn't add any to the circulation pile. No one really questioned it, and I guess they figured I had a girl back home. I never denied it, but I never outright lied, either. I actually had a decent bunch of guys I bunked with and after the first time they dragged me out, no one teased me about avoiding the girls in the clubs. I shared an apartment with a few of the guys off base once I was stationed in North Carolina, and we were buddies, but since I was underage, they didn't drag me off to party with them. I had the internet for anything I needed by way of porn, which was all double password protected in case they got nosy."

Jasper sighed again and Edward pressed his cheek against Jasper's in quiet comfort. "I've always been a gay man, Edward," Jasper said quietly. "And yesterday, suddenly, I found myself thinking about whether or not I was sexually attracted to Bella, a lovely young woman who had been, until about 24 hours ago, one of my best friends who reminds me of my little sister."

Edward really had shaken up Jasper's view of himself. "Baby, I'm sorry," Edward apologized softly. "I didn't really think about what I said, and I honestly didn't mean to make you question yourself so deeply." And he hadn't. "I only asked because it seemed like maybe if you had, you might be better positioned to understand where I was coming from. I don't want you to feel like you have to change your relationship with Bella, or open yourself up to experiences you don't want to have."

"If…" Jasper trailed off for a moment and Edward waited patiently. "No, never mind," he said quietly with a shake of his head. "It doesn't matter," he said softly and relaxed against Edward.

Edward let it go; Jasper had deemed whatever he'd been thinking unimportant, and though they'd grown incredibly better at communicating with each other, Edward didn't want to say anything else that would put distance between them again.

"I meant what I said yesterday," Edward said quietly. "I'm with you, and nothing's going to change that. If something comes up, we'll deal with it, okay? I honestly don't know what possessed me to say a few of the things I did, and I'm sorry that I made you doubt yourself."

Jasper nodded. "I know," he said quietly. "I'm not sure what I was thinking, either. I read more into your comment about being jealous than I probably should have. I never meant to imply that I thought you'd be unfaithful, I just wanted you to know that I was willing to be open to a certain extent, if we talked about it first."

Edward kissed the top of his head. "I understand what you were trying to do, and like I said, I'm glad we had the conversation. I've never been in a serious relationship, Jasper," he said honestly. "I can't say for sure that I will never want to be with a woman ever again, but I can say that I'm an honest person, and I don't condone infidelity. I don't want you to worry about whether or not I want to be with you; I do. I love you, and we'll work through whatever issues we have. We just have to remember to talk to each other."

"I love you too. And I'm still sorry for opening this can of worms," Jasper said softly.

"Don't be," Edward said. "Don't be sorry for talking to me about anything that has to do with us. No real harm done, unless you've managed to get pneumonia by wandering out in the rain yesterday."

Jasper laughed softly and shook his head. "Just a bit worn around the edges," he assured Edward.

"Okay." Edward sat up a bit and Jasper turned his head and they shared a sweet kiss before settling back down.

They were quiet for a few minutes, and Jasper spoke up again just as Edward was contemplating going downstairs for a fresh cup of tea for both of them. "Can I ask you something?"

"Sure," Edward answered.

"How did you decide you were bi?" Jasper asked softly.

"Hm," Edward said, letting out a slow breath. "Remember when you were younger, pretty much everything gave you a hard on? Looking around in the locker room, anyone brushing against you in the hall, a stiff breeze?" He laughed quietly, Jasper's affirmative laughter joining him. "Having a doctor for a father is sometimes helpful, but when he says 'it's normal, use lotion or lube,' it's not quite reassuring, y'know?"

Jasper laughed softly and nodded. "Daddy said somewhat the same thing, and told me it was okay to put a lock on my door."

"Esme did too, but made me give her the key thingy for the privacy lock," Edward said. "Anyway, things calmed down after awhile, and I stopped being quite so freaked out about the 'thing' in my pants," he said lightly and Jasper 'hmed' his agreement. "But I began to realize that when I was alone, I was fantasizing about both men and women, girls and boys from school, or whatever. I figured for awhile I was still just hormonally overcharged and it wasn't taking much stimulation.

"Junior year, the bands went on a trip to L.A. for five days in the spring. I was playing piano for the jazz band and sometimes I helped out with percussion for the orchestra if I wasn't performing with them on piano," he explained. "We had a lot of free time, which meant we could take advantage of those three-day passes for Disneyland the surrounding parks. The group I hung out with made some friends from another school who were down there at the same time, and we wandered around the parks together when we weren't performing. Anyway, I kinda hooked up with this boy, Danny, for the few days we were there. We didn't do anything," Edward said with a slight roll of his eyes at Jasper's teasing look. "Well, nothing serious, anyway. He kissed me, I kissed him back, and I liked it."

Jasper smirked. "Ah, young love."

"Shut it," Edward teased, nipping at his ear. "We came back and I didn't say anything to anyone, wanting to sort things out, because I was still pretty sure that I liked girls. I went with a few girls for the rest of that year, nothing serious again, and then I was off for the summer." He paused, about to reveal the extent of his high school nerdiness. "I went to a sleep away music camp for six weeks," he revealed in a quiet voice.

"And?" Jasper prompted.

Edward grinned. "What, no band camp jokes?"

Jasper shrugged. "I did a swim camp when I was a freshman and sophomore. So I can guess at what you're going to say," he answered with a smirk.

"His name was Stephen and we fooled around a bit," Edward said, resting his chin on Jasper's shoulder. "By the time I got home, I was more than halfway convinced I was gay, except that I still was pretty sure that I liked girls, too. So for Homecoming, I took out this girl, Annie. She was a shy, quiet girl, but she had a wicked sense of humor when she was in a small group of people she knew and trusted. A bunch of us went out on a group date for dinner, and then we went to the dance afterward. By the end of the night there was no question that I also really liked girls," he recalled with a smile.

"Did you stay together?" Jasper asked.

"For awhile," Edward responded with a shrug. "She moved away over the holidays and we lost touch. I didn't really see anyone after that, focusing on getting ready for university, making audition tapes and all of that. It wasn't really until I went to college that I really figured out that it wasn't necessarily the body I was with, but the person. It took some time for me to get there, but eventually I just embraced the idea that I could be attracted to anyone, and trusted that my instincts would never steer me wrong."

He smiled and kissed Jasper's jaw. "So the short story is I experimented and eventually concluded that I liked men and women. Carlisle and Esme accepted the news with their typical enthusiasm for anything having to do with me and Emmett, though Carlisle did pull me aside to ensure I was being safe and careful. Basically, so long as I was happy, they were happy for me."

"But not without struggle," Jasper clarified.

"Not without, no," Edward said. "I was an awkward teenager as it was," he recalled. "All limbs and odd colored hair, playing the piano because I liked it not because mom made me keep up with lessons, and a straight A student," he described. "Throw a confused sexuality into the mix and I thought for awhile that there was something seriously wrong with me. I was able to talk with my father some, but what young man really wants to tell his dad that he's not sure about his sexuality and ask for advice on how to fix it?" He sighed. "But I eventually grew into my body and the rest sorted itself out."

"I'm glad it did," Jasper said softly. "Thanks, baby."

"For what, love?" Edward asked, running his nose lightly over Jasper's stubble; he must not have been feeling all that well if he hadn't taken time to shave.

"For telling me that. It'll help, I think, trying to figure things out for myself."

"Don't force anything," Edward advised. "You're still Jasper, and the man I love. If you decide you want to experiment with something, I'll support you, and if you just want to talk through your scrambled thoughts, I'm here."

"I know," Jasper said softly. When he turned to face Edward again, his eyes didn't seem quite so haunted, and he kissed Edward back when their lips came together. "I love you," Jasper breathed against him.

"I love you, too, Jasper," Edward answered. He felt better about where they stood, knowing neither of them was upset with the other. He still carried some guilt about his part in the conversation that got them to that point, but he also knew that Jasper didn't blame him. They were talking, and they'd sort through any future crisis together.

"What time do we need to be downstairs?" Jasper asked quietly, shifting to resume his previous position against Edward's chest.

"Whenever," Edward answered casually. "They'll hold the game for us, but there's plenty of time," he said, glancing at the clock over his shoulder. "I'm sure someone will come get us if they get anxious for our presence."

Jasper nodded and Edward's arms wrapped around him. "Wake me in an hour or so?" he asked quietly.

"Of course," Edward responded. "Comfy?"

"Mmhm," Jasper hummed. "Just want to lay here with you for awhile."

Edward nodded, though Jasper couldn't see him. "Me too," he agreed. A nap wasn't a bad idea; it was going to be a long late night, and he hoped that maybe a quick rest would give him back some emotional stability for the evening. "Rest, baby. I'll make sure we make it down before we miss anything good."

Jasper laughed softly and covered Edward's hands with his own and soon dozed off. Edward drifted off soon after, the sounds of Jasper's soft breathing combined with the noise downstairs accompanying his descent into sleep.

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The Fandom Gives Back auction is up and running. As of Monday night, they've raised $48 short of $15k, which is $5,000 over the original goal. If you haven't yet checked out the auction boards, please do so. If you don't want to bid on anything, please consider making a donation. If you can't afford that (and I totes understand), if you're on twitter, livejournal, etc, please help keep the message alive and out there.

New Year's Eve is up next, and should post on Wednesday next week.


	32. Chapter 31: New Year's

**Naelany and wishingforlove are great at helping me catch the weird little things I do sometimes. **

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Jasper woke slowly from his nap, still feeling the residual ache in his muscles that had been with him most of the day. He sat up and stretched a bit, wincing slightly in pain. Edward was still asleep, reclined against the arm of the couch, but he stirred when Jasper moved.

Jasper kissed him softly and Edward's sleepy green eyes opened a bit. "I'm going to take a shower," he said quietly. A soak in hot water would hopefully help him relax and feel better.

Edward's fingers brushed over his cheek. "Feeling okay?"

"Yeah." He smiled and turned his head to kiss Edward's palm. "I'll be back."

"Mm." Edward's eyes closed and he drifted back off as his hand slid back down to rest at his side.

Jasper ran his thumb lightly over the frown lines emerging from Edward's eyes with a silent sigh. They may have gotten things sorted, but that didn't mean that the conversation hadn't taken a toll on both of them. His back ached as he rose and it took him a minute to straighten up and get his pills from the table near the bed. He took two, dug out a clean pair of jeans and a comfortable long sleeved t-shirt and tossed them on the foot of the bed, along with a clean pair of underwear and socks.

He briefly considered drawing a bath, but he didn't think he'd fit comfortably enough in the tub to make it worth it. Instead, he turned on the taps and let the bathroom begin to fill with steam as he used the toilet, not feeling up to bothering with a shave.

The ibuprofen was beginning to kick in as Jasper stood under the hot water, feeling his body slowly relax as the tension and ache left his muscles. His headache slowly eased as well, and he figured with food, he'd probably feel better; he hadn't eaten much in the past twenty-four hours.

When he returned to the bedroom wrapped in a towel, he saw that Edward had gotten up and turned the sheets down on the bed, and was standing next to it with a soft smile. "Come here," he said softly to Jasper.

He crossed the room and went willingly into Edward's arms, slumping against him slightly. Edward kissed the top of his head, then his temple, his earlobe, his neck, his collarbone. "Put your shorts on," Edward ordered quietly. "And lie down on your stomach."

Jasper lifted his head from where he'd rested it against Edward's, slightly confused.

"Trust me, lover?" Edward asked softly, tugging lightly at the towel around Jasper's waist.

"Always," Jasper responded, and did as he was told. While he changed into his underwear, Edward turned on the stereo, light classical music floating from the speakers, and the lights were turned out, letting the late afternoon sun light the room.

Once he was settled, he heard Edward move around beside him, and then large, warm hands were sweeping over his back, smoothed by a bit of lotion that he could just barely smell. "Hm," Jasper hummed. "Feels good."

Edward laughed quietly, and Jasper felt his lips between his shoulder blades. "Relax, baby," he murmured.

Jasper closed his eyes and focused on the feeling of Edward's hands. He seemed to know exactly how to coax each knot from Jasper's back. "You're very good at this," he murmured.

"A brother with a BS in sports medicine occasionally comes in handy," Edward mused. "Emmett taught me a few things while he's worked with me over the years," he explained quietly. "He had to take a course in massage as part of his degree."

Jasper hummed his agreement. Despite the accident that had kept Edward from pursuing his musical career, his hands were still strong and though he may have lacked agility to play professional piano any longer, there was nothing unskilled about the way he manipulated Jasper's body.

"We should find a spa when we go to San Francisco," Edward spoke quietly. "Maybe a side trip into wine country or something."

"Sounds nice," Jasper said. "We could go for longer than a weekend, y'know," he said drowsily. "If you don't have anything else going on."

"I don't," Edward affirmed. "We should figure that all out this weekend and start making reservations," he said, making a long sweep with the side of his hand down Jasper's spine.

"Yeah. We keep saying that, don't we?"

Edward laughed softly, making Jasper smile. "We keep getting distracted."

"Hm," Jasper agreed. "Not all bad."

"Not at all," Edward responded, kissing his neck again.

They continued to speak quietly as Edward focused mostly on Jasper's back and shoulders. Jasper kept his eyes closed and focused on the sound of Edward's voice and feel of his hands and truly felt himself relax completely, probably for the first time in a week, since before Christmas Eve.

Edward's hands gradually began to slow and instead of kneading knots out of his flesh, the touches became broad, comforting sweeping strokes until they came to rest at the base of Jasper's spine.

"Feeling better now?" Edward asked.

"Like a big puddle of goo," Jasper answered with a smile. "Yes. Thank you."

Edward kissed him softly. "You're welcome. I'm going to go get cleaned up."

Jasper nodded. The ache in his body had been replaced with something much more pleasant and he felt more relaxed than he had in a long time as he watched Edward pad to the bathroom. When he heard the shower kick on, he forced himself to get up and find the clothes he'd laid out before his shower. Once he was dressed, he remade the bed, and by then the shower had turned off.

Edward emerged scruffy as usual, damp, and with his hair going every which way from being roughly toweled dry, Jasper assumed. Edward dressed quickly in jeans and a t-shirt before combing his fingers through his hair and slipping his glasses on. He sat next to Jasper on the edge of the bed. "Do you want to go downstairs? We don't have to, if you don't feel up to it."

"Sure," Jasper answered. "I'm feeling better, and we should spend time with everyone before they leave." He would feel guilty about keeping Edward from spending time with his family, especially since they'd have the whole house mostly to themselves in a couple days, and then were off for their own vacation. Jasper could be selfish with Edward then. Strange that just the morning before he'd been thinking about how it was nice he and Edward could find time to spend alone; at the moment, he wasn't really sure he could. Going back to school in a month would be difficult at best, after spending so much time alone together.

"If you're sure?" Edward pressed.

Jasper sighed softly and smiled at Edward. "I'm sure, Edward. I've slept for the better part of the last two days. I think I can handle spending some time with your family," he said somewhat snarkily.

Edward laughed softly, holding up his hands in surrender. "Alright, alright. Point taken." He rose and extended a hand, which Jasper took.

Hand in hand they navigated their way down the stairs, where, from the sounds of things, everyone else had already gathered and gotten into party mode.

Jasper followed Edward into the dining room where he held a plate as Edward selected snacks. At the breakfast bar in the kitchen, Jasper poured himself a glass of iced tea while Edward filled a glass with ice, root beer, and a generous splash of bourbon.

Jasper carried the plate and his drink into the living room behind Edward. Carlisle was setting up the games table with the cribbage board, a deck of cards on the table along with the instruction books Jasper had ordered to go with it. Emmett had his game console set up on the second television and he and Rose were playing a game Jasper didn't recognize. Everyone else was already gathered around the table with drinks and plates of snacks, waiting for Carlisle to get them started.

Edward settled on the couch and tugged Jasper down with him. Jasper placed one of the throw pillows across Edward's lap and stretched out on his side, his head in Edward's lap so he could see the game going on, as well as the television. It was too early for the celebration coverage to have started on the west coast, but the news was playing quietly in the background.

"Jasper, are you still not feeling well?" Esme asked, turning in her seat to look at him and Edward.

"I'm feeling better," he assured her. "This is just comfortable," he admitted quietly, feeling his ears get hot with everyone's quiet laughter. Edward kissed his temple and he relaxed again.

"Emmett, we're going to start, so you better get over here if you want to learn how to play," Alice called.

The noise from the video game stopped and Rosalie and Emmett joined the others at the table.

"You can play if you'd like," Jasper said softly to Edward. He knew they could squeeze one more chair in around the table. Jasper already knew how to play cribbage, so he thought he'd let them practice for awhile and get everything figured out before deciding to join in.

"I'm fine right here," Edward responded just as softly. "I'll learn from their mistakes," he teased.

Jasper laughed softly and nodded. He watched from his position on the couch as Carlisle assumed the role of game master, the books stacked at his elbow for quick reference while he shuffled through a sheaf of papers he'd apparently printed off from someplace.

The cribbage board that Jasper had ordered had an additional two columns of holes for score keeping, and twelve sets of colored and shaped pegs for score keeping, with the Cullen Crest embossed near the top of the board. He'd custom ordered the board to allow for easier play for more people, given how often the group all came together and played. He was happy that he'd been able to bring the family something they didn't already have, but that fit in with their close knit (and competitive) nature.

Carlisle easily commanded everyone's attention and spelled out the basic rules and scoring for the game after everyone chose their scoring pegs and elected Emma to be score keeper. It was a slow process as they began the game, everyone figuring out the rules as they went. There was a lot of laughter and good natured ribbing for the first hour or so as they learned. Once they had a handle on the game, they took a break to replenish drinks and snacks, use the bathroom, and stretch before they settled in for the real game.

Jasper and Edward joined them in the dining room and kitchen to refill their plates and glasses. "Where's your 'Puppy Chow,' Darlin'?" Jasper asked Bella.

She giggled and led him to a large bowl that, sure enough, looked like it was full of kibble. Bella used the serving spoon to dip out a few pieces and dumped them into his palm.

Jasper stared at them for a moment. "What is it?" he asked before he threw them into his mouth.

"Cereal, chocolate, peanut butter, and powdered sugar," she answered with a grin.

"It's good," Jasper said after he'd swallowed. He spooned out a small amount onto his plate with a wink. The snack was a bit on the sweet side, but he liked the combination of chocolate and peanut butter.

"Thanks, Jazzy," Bella said quietly, giving him a brief one armed hug while she balanced her plate in her other hand.

He kissed the top of her head before she moved on for something else. Despite not having eaten much in the last 24 hours, he wasn't overly hungry, and so took small portions of what looked most appetizing, hoping it would spark his appetite so he could get on with feeling more like himself.

Drinks were mixed in the kitchen, Jasper once again just opting for iced tea, thanking Esme for making it. She just patted his arm with a fond smile.

After a few minutes everyone gathered back in the living room and Jasper settled on the sofa with Edward once more, sitting next to him, their thighs touching. Edward draped his left arm over Jasper's shoulder and they watched the rest of the family take their seats and get ready to play.

The first game took awhile to get through with so many people playing. Jasper split his attention between the game, Edward, and the television while idly picking at his food. Edward shot him a concerned look a few times, but Jasper just shrugged and smiled softly back. He just wasn't hungry.

"Are you sure you're feeling alright?" Edward asked him when they got up to refill their drinks again. Edward's cheeks were slightly pink from the alcohol in his first two drinks, but otherwise didn't look intoxicated.

"I'm sure, baby," Jasper assured him patiently. "My appetite just hasn't come back. I promise I'll talk to Carlisle if it lasts more than a couple days, alright?"

"Okay," Edward decided after a beat, kissing him softly.

When they returned to the living room, Emmett had decided he was moving back to video games and he, David, Rosalie, and Alice decided to play some four player game on the Wii. Edward and Jasper took over two of the seats as Carlisle dealt the new game.

The rest of the night continued with laughter and chit chat as they played cards and video games. After two more rounds of cribbage, they switched to dominoes, and eventually broke up as it neared midnight. The couples (and Alice and Bella) sat or stood around as the clock ticked down from 11:30, the annoying program from Times Square providing them with the time and music that was making Edward twitch beside Jasper. He figured that may have more to do with the several drinks Edward had consumed rather than the music itself, but it was still amusing to watch.

As the clock crept toward midnight, Alice and Bella helped Esme uncork the champagne and serve up cake and ice cream. Emmett handed out party favors, and the lights were lowered, the fire, television, and lights on the Christmas tree providing more than enough atmosphere for everyone.

The crowd on TV began counting down, and the family joined in as they hit the ten second mark. Emmett's voice boomed over all the others, and Jasper felt Edward lean into him slightly where they stood at the arm of the couch.

"Happy New Year, baby," Jasper whispered as the ball hit bottom on the TV and a cheer went up, tinny from the speakers. Around him, the rest of the family echoed his sentiment as Jasper kissed Edward, his right hand sliding up Edward's neck to cup his jaw lightly, his left anchored at Edward's hip. Edward's arms circled Jasper's neck and his weight leaned into him slightly. The kiss was less passionate than it could have been, Jasper deeply conscious of the rest of the family around them, but that didn't prevent him from slipping a little bit of tongue into the kiss. He felt Edward's fingers in his hair, and when the kiss ended, they rested their foreheads against each other's.

"Happy New Year, Jas," Edward whispered with a smile. "Any resolutions?" he asked quietly.

Jasper returned the soft smile. "Not yet."

Edward laughed and they broke apart, their hands finding each other's. Rose and Emmett were still locked tightly together, seated on a loveseat; Alice and Bella were giggling over glasses of champagne in the other. Carlisle and Esme and David and Emma were dancing slowly as couples to the sounds of Auld Lang Syne coming from the television.

Jasper grabbed two of the glasses of champagne from the coffee table and handed one to Edward, and they quietly toasted the new year together. "Ring out the old, ring in the new, Ring, happy bells, across the snow: The year is going, let him go; Ring out the false, ring in the true," Jasper said softly.

Edward pressed his lips softly against Jasper's. "To a year of health, happiness, prosperity, and love," he responded. They clinked their glasses together gently and drank. "I love you," Edward said.

Jasper smiled and kissed him again. "I love you, too."

They split apart and made their rounds to the rest of the family. Jasper did the 'man hug' with Emmett, and gave Rosalie a hug and kiss on the cheek. Alice jumped from the chair she was sharing with Bella and kissed him lightly on the lips before bouncing off.

"Happy New Year, Jas," Bella said softly, her cheeks pink from drinking, but she was remarkably steady on her feet as she crossed the few feet to him and kissed him softly on the mouth.

"And to you, darlin'," Jasper said, embracing her and kissing the top of her head. Her arms went around his waist and they swayed a bit to the music from the TV. "What do you hope for this year?"

"A drama-free life," she answered. "Though I'll settle for being healthy and happy, and having my family."

Jasper laughed softly and kissed her temple. "Good answer."

She tipped her head up and beamed up at him. "How 'bout you?"

"The same," he answered. "For us all to be happy and healthy and to keep building on my relationships and moving forward with my life."

She nestled against him again, and he held her, finding it amusing that Bella turned even more tactile and snuggly after she'd been drinking. "You'll get there, Jazzy," she said quietly. "Just remember you're not alone."

"I will," he assured her, kissing the top of her head again before Emmett whisked her away with a laugh.

Jasper continued on, handshakes bestowed on Carlisle and David, hugs and kisses were received from Emma and Esme and he eventually found his way back to Edward. Another bottle of champagne was opened and shared while they talked and watched the festivities wind down on TV. It wasn't too much longer before the parents said their goodnights and retired.

Jasper had only two glasses of champagne to contribute to his blood alcohol, still feeling slightly under the weather, so he was mostly sober as they settled in as a group, he and Edward on one chair, Emmett and Rose on the other with Bella and Alice on the sofa.

It was nearly dawn before they broke up to head for bed. Alice and Bella leaned on each other as they headed down to the basement, giggling. Jasper had a feeling they'd sleep pretty hard and need to be tiptoed around in the morning. Emmett and Rose were in similar straits as they stumbled up the stairs ahead of Jasper and Edward, and though their rooms were separated by Edward's bathroom, Jasper was thankful they'd probably pass out before they could get up to much.

Jasper had hoped to be able to ring in the New Year with Edward more intimately, but he just didn't feel up to it.

"It's okay, love," Edward said quietly as they made their way to their room down the hall, seeming to know what Jasper was thinking. "We'll have all week next week while everyone's gone," he whispered into Jasper's ear.

"I know," Jasper whispered back, kissing Edward softly on the neck before they stumbled into their room.

Edward turned and kissed him deeply, pressing Jasper against the closed door. Jasper's hands tangled in Edward's hair and Edward's hands slipped under Jasper's shirt and pressed flat against his ribs. Jasper returned the kiss before sweeping his lips over Edward's stubbled jaw and nuzzling him lightly.

Edwards sighed softly against Jasper's neck. Jasper smiled softly and kissed him again before releasing him. Jasper crossed to the windows and made sure the drapes were pulled to block out any light and Edward turned down the bed. They shared the sink for teeth brushing and face washing, playfully nudging each other out of the way before they changed into pajama bottoms and crawled into bed.

Jasper stretched out on his back and Edward curled into his side, resting his head on Jasper's shoulder, as usual. "Have a good time?" Edward asked quietly as he nestled in, throwing one leg across Jasper's.

"Yeah, I did," Jasper answered honestly. "I love your family," he said quietly. "I love that they're understanding and welcoming, and that we can be ourselves. It's so easy to spend time with them; no one expects anything and it's just nice to have that again."

Edward kissed his jaw. "I'm glad you came to stay with us," he murmured. "I love you. I'm glad you're fitting in with my family. I love that you're comfortable here."

"I love you too, Edward," Jasper said just as softly. "Do you have any resolutions?"

"Mm," he answered with a nod. "A couple."

Jasper waited. When Edward didn't explain, Jasper nudged him lightly. "Care to share?"

Edward laughed softly. His eyes had closed, lashes dark against his pale skin. "To walk without a cane," he whispered. "To be more positive. To love you the best way I can."

Jasper smiled. "That last one shouldn't be too hard to keep," he said softly.

"Hm," Edward agreed. Jasper could tell he was getting close to sleep with the way his responses became sounds rather than words. "Nope. Just the one I want the most," he murmured.

"Just love me however you can, Edward," Jasper whispered into the dark. "And I'll do my best to do the same."

"Mm. Deal," Edward whispered sleepily.

Jasper kissed his forehead and was snuggled in return. He held Edward close and it wasn't long before they both drifted off, content with each other's company and secure in each other's arms.

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Ring out the old, ring in the new, Ring, happy bells, across the snow: The year is going, let him go; Ring out the false, ring in the true. ~ Lord Alfred Tennyson. Source, about(dot)com

Thanksgiving is this week in the U.S., and even though I'm not going anywhere, I probably won't post this week so I can enjoy the holiday. Sorry for leaving you all with a short chapter before a break, but that's just the way things fell out. Look for a new post...Monday or Tuesday. Happy Thanksgiving to those of you that celebrate.


	33. Chapter 32: If You're Going to San Fran

**Naelany and wishingforlove continue to hold my hand through insecure moments, and correct me when I get things wrong.**

**Readers, thank you for your patience and your love for this story. I hope you all had great Thanksgivings (or Thursdays), and that your holiday seasons are full of warmth, happiness, and love. :D **

**And now, what you've been waiting for...**

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When the captain announced their descent into San Francisco, Edward shook Jasper awake gently. Their flight from Seattle had been uneventful, and Jasper had passed out as soon as the fasten seat belt light had clicked off. Edward probably would have too, but he'd never slept all that easily in a moving vehicle of any kind, especially since the accident. They'd spent the night in Seattle to cut down on driving time, since it was a four hour drive from Forks to Sea/Tac, but they'd still had to get up early to catch their 6:30 am flight.

"Are we there?" Jasper drawled sleepily.

"Just about. We're getting ready to land." The crew was coming around, picking up the last bits of trash and asking the passengers to put their tray tables away and seats back up.

Edward leaned over Jasper slightly so he could glance out the window. The city was spread below them, and he smiled as he felt Jasper's hand on his thigh.

They'd had a good week of mostly private time at Edward's parents' house. Bella had been around for a couple of days, but had decided to take a last minute trip of her own out to the Reservation where she'd lived with her father. She hadn't left before making Jasper her enchiladas, though. She'd only left two days before they had, and Jasper and Edward had put that time to good use.

They collected their luggage from the carousel and made their way to the BART kiosk to buy passes. They'd opted not to bother with a rental car since they didn't know the city and public transportation could get them just about anywhere. That, and Jasper had admitted to not being comfortable driving in the city, and Edward was willing to experiment with the city's public transportation. They would rent a car for a day when they went into wine country for the spa day Edward had set up for them. Edward had had to assure Jasper that he'd be okay with walking a lot, but it had been easier than he'd anticipated. Though he'd only been working with Jane for a month, the therapy was really paying off.

They had planned most of the five day trip together, though it appeared that they'd unleashed a monster in letting Jasper anywhere near maps, brochures, and train schedules. Though he teased Jasper about it, Edward had to admit that Jasper was good at putting together a trip that allowed them to do everything, but not so over-scheduled they drove themselves into exhaustion. Through the process of putting everything together, Edward had learned that Jasper's MOS (military operational specialty) was logistics with a secondary specialty in intelligence.

Since they knew they'd have seven hours of travel between the flight and catching the train into the city, Jasper had suggested an easy day of sightseeing. After they checked into their hotel and got settled, they were off to Golden Gate Park and from there, catching dinner and calling it an early night. The four days following were similarly planned, and their sixth day was for sleeping in and traveling home. They'd have one more week to themselves before classes started once they got back to Forks.

Edward was both dreading and looking forward to the new semester. He was excited for the plans he'd made for his band, but dreading what the travel and living arrangements meant for his relationship with Jasper. But he pushed the thoughts away as they both purchased $20 in BART fare and entered the gate to the platform.

They didn't have to wait long for their train. Edward watched Jasper check their itinerary again, probably double checking what stop they needed. They were staying at the Hilton at Union Square, somewhere fairly central and within an easy walking distance to transportation. Smiling reassuringly, he took Jasper's hand as they boarded. A younger man gave up his seat with a nod at Edward. Rather than get indignant over the kid's politeness, he let Jasper nudge him toward the vacant space where he sat, cane between his legs, and Jasper stood at his shoulder, holding onto the railing.

It was too loud for them to talk on the train, so Edward people watched between stops, smiling softly when he felt Jasper's fingers brush against his neck. Most people had headphones peeking out from under hair or clothing, and Edward noticed one young woman knitting as the train sped through the tunnels. The older woman in the seat next to Edward got off a few stops after they got on, and Jasper took her seat after the train set off again.

When the conductor announced the Powell St. Station, Jasper gathered their two bags (Edward had their carry on backpack) and Edward waited until the train stopped to stand, not trusting his balance and inertia to keep him upright.

It wasn't a long walk, but there were a lot of people out between the station (and entrance to a mall, Edward noted) and their hotel a few blocks up and over. He noted the restaurants and shops they passed and decided they'd chosen a good area of the city to stay in.

Edward watched, amused, as Jasper flirted with the girl behind the counter as they checked in. He didn't seem to even notice that he was doing it, his natural charm turning his accent up a bit, causing the girl to smile. Jasper ended up getting two keys just in case, and directions to the elevator around the corner.

Their room had a single king-sized bed, which they'd requested, of course, and a mediocre view of the garage on the other side of the street. Jasper laughed as Edward pulled a face, though he figured they wouldn't be spending all that much unoccupied time in the room to be bothered with the view.

Edward stretched out on the bed while Jasper put away their clothes and stashed their bags in the closet. Edward focused on relaxing, the muscles of his lower back tense and tight from travel, making his legs ache.

He felt the bed tip next to him. "Doing ok?" Jasper asked.

Edward nodded. "Just need to stretch out and take something." The flight had been a long six hours, and unlike the train, Edward hadn't had the leg room he'd needed to keep from getting cramped up from sitting still.

"We can stay in today," Jasper offered.

"Nope," Edward said flatly. "I'll be fine. Just stiff from travelling. We can relax for a bit, then we'll stick to your schedule."

"_Our_ schedule. You helped, remember?" Jasper defended, making Edward laugh. "Relax. I'm going to shower off the travel grime," he said, before leaning in to kiss Edward softly. "I'll find your pills."

"Thanks, baby," Edward conceded. He closed his eyes and focused on his breathing and the sound of Jasper moving around the room. He heard the quiet rattle of the pills in the bottle Jasper sat down on the bureau next to the bed.

He cracked his eyes open when he heard the shower turn on. Jasper had drawn the curtains, muting the foggy day light seeping through. Edward took two pills with the bottle of water and lay back down, making a mental note to do a few stretches before they left the hotel for the afternoon.

The pain slowly ebbed as the pills went to work and Edward was able to relax. He listened to Jasper move around and dress, he assumed, before the bed dipped and Jasper was pressed up against him. Edward shifted onto his side, curling into Jasper slightly, smiling when he heard Jasper's soft laugh and felt his arms come around Edward's waist.

They rested together for a few minutes before Edward opened his eyes again and looked into Jasper's face. His lover looked relaxed and content, dressed casually in jeans and a t-shirt, his blonde hair mussed. Edward propped himself up on his elbow and smiled down at Jasper.

Jasper looked back, amusement written on his features. "See something you like?" he teased.

Edward laughed softly and kissed Jasper, his hand cupping Jasper's cheek and sliding back into his hair. "Mm," he said, licking his lips after he broke the kiss. "You know it."

Jasper kissed him back, then gave him a gentle shove. "Go get yourself cleaned up, or we won't leave this room for the next two days."

"Is that a threat or a promise?" Edward asked, laughing as Jasper swatted at him again. But he slid off the bed and limped heavily into the bathroom to wash his face, and decided he was good enough. Jasper was sorting through the backpack when Edward returned to the main room.

"I'm ready," Edward announced.

Jasper zipped the backpack closed. "Me too." He rose and shouldered the backpack and slid a room key into his back pocket. Edward picked the other up off the bureau and tucked it into his wallet with his newly purchased BART ticket, and followed Jasper out of the room after grabbing his jacket.

They grabbed a quick bite to eat and then Edward let Jasper fall into tour guide mode as he pulled out the map and train schedule and guided them toward the Muni stop they needed, which turned out to be near the stop where they'd gotten off the BART. Edward smiled indulgently at the kind of child like glee his partner was displaying. It wasn't often that he got to see Jasper so excited about something; he was normally fairly reserved unless they were completely alone, and Edward figured it was their relative anonymity within the city that was allowing Jasper a measure of freedom he probably hadn't experienced in years. Once again Edward was reminded of Jasper's past hurts, and it struck him at just how fortunate he'd been to never have to hide anything about himself, whereas Jasper had hidden and still been hurt and betrayed by those who should have had his back. It was still remarkable to Edward that Jasper had come out of everything in as good a shape as he had. A lesser man may not have survived it.

That thought sent a shiver down Edward's spine and he shuddered, not wanting to think about the possibility that he might never have met Jasper.

Due to Jasper's planning and timing, they didn't have to wait long for their train. It was about a 20 minute ride and then a short walk before they arrived in the park proper.

It was nearly 2 in the afternoon by the time they reached the park, and since the Academy of Science was high on both of their lists of things they wanted to see, and it closed at 5, they started there. They took their time wandering through the exhibits, and didn't quite manage to see everything before closing time. Being winter, it was dark by the time they exited, and rather than keep walking the park and miss anything, they decided to go ahead and head back to their hotel for an early night, both tired from the travel and bit of sightseeing they'd done.

They held hands as they rode back to where they'd started earlier that afternoon and as they walked back to their hotel, deciding on the way they'd just order room service for dinner and spend the evening relaxing.

When they got to the elevator, Edward felt like he'd suddenly hit the wall, and he leaned into Jasper a bit more. Jasper's laugh was low in Edward's ear and vibrated through his body as Jasper's arm wound around Edward's waist.

"Tired?" Jasper asked quietly, and to Edward, unnecessarily.

"Hm. A bit," Edward admitted. "It's been a long day."

"It has," Jasper agreed. "Are you hurting?"

"It's not too bad," Edward responded, and he was being honest. The general ache was there, but the intense pain he'd been under before Thanksgiving was thankfully absent. Mostly he figured he hurt because he was tired and had been on his feet all day.

"Why don't you shower and relax," Jasper offered as he opened their door. "I'll get dinner ordered and we can cuddle up and watch a movie."

"Sounds good." Edward shuffled in behind Jasper. He went straight into the bathroom, knowing if he stopped to sit down on the bed, he'd likely not get up again for awhile. He got the water running and slowly stripped out of his clothes, feeling his muscles relax as the warm steam began to fill the room.

"Babe?" Jasper called, knocking lightly on the door. "What do you want to drink?" he asked, popping his head into the steamy room.

"Surprise me," Edward said with a shrug.

Jasper grinned and winked before ducking back out and closing the door behind him. Edward laughed quietly and carefully climbed into the tub, pulling the curtain behind him. He lingered under the hot water after he washed his hair, sighing softly as some of the ache seeped out of his lower body. He was really looking forward to their spa day; Jasper took care of him as best he could, but Edward _really_ needed the professional massage that they had scheduled after their mud baths.

The lights were low in the room when Edward emerged from the bathroom wrapped in a towel. The curtains were still drawn over the windows, and Jasper had turned the bed down and stacked the pillows up against the headboard. The heat had also been turned up, and Jasper had changed into lounge pants and an undershirt.

Edward dressed similarly and joined Jasper on the bed. He tucked his toes under the covers and curled up next to his partner, half sitting, half laying down with his head resting against Jasper's shoulder.

Jasper kissed the top of his head. "Dinner's going to be awhile. Want to pick a movie?" He handed Edward the remote.

"Sure. What are you in the mood for?" Edward thumbed through the menus until he got to the movie options.

"Surprise me," Jasper responded with a smile.

Edward laughed quietly and scrolled through the options, eventually settling on an older film they'd both seen so they wouldn't have to pay too much attention.

Halfway through the movie (and in the midst of Jasper trying to get Edward's t-shirt off), their dinner arrived. Jasper rose to let the hotel employee in, grabbing his wallet from the drawer. Edward straightened his clothes as the cart was wheeled in, and the man left after Jasper tipped him.

They ate in bed while finishing the movie, sandwiches and French fries that didn't require silverware (and allowed them to feed each other). After Jasper cleared the empty dishes away and turned the rest of the lights down, Edward snuggled into his side and let his eyes close. Though it was early by their usual standards, Edward was exhausted, warm, and full, and he let the gentle rhythm of Jasper's fingers stroking his neck lull him to sleep over the soft hum of voices on the television.

Jasper's side of the bed was empty when Edward woke the next morning, but he could smell the coffee, so he assumed his lover hadn't gone too far. He stretched as he sat up, pleased to find that the previous days' aches had faded to what was more or less normal for him. Edward glanced toward the door as he heard it clicked closed, and Jasper emerged with another room service cart with covered plates, an ice bucket, and a carafe of orange juice.

"Mornin'," Jasper greeted him with a grin. "Sleep well?"

"Yup." Edward answered. "You?"

"Pretty good for a strange bed, but that probably had more to do with you than anything else," Jasper said, parking the cart next to the bed and joining Edward. He perched on the edge and leaned in and kissed Edward tenderly. "Feeling better?"

"More like myself, yeah," Edward responded. "So what's the plan for today?"

"I think it's my turn to give you a little looking after," Jasper drawled, a grin on his face. "How do you feel about staying in?"

"I don't know," Edward teased lightly, fingering Jasper's t-shirt. "We've got this whole city at our feet, and you just want to stay in the hotel room?"

Jasper leaned in close and brushed his nose over Edward's pulse point up to his ear. When he spoke, his voice was low and rough and his breath warm on Edward's skin. "Did you bring your stocking stuffer?"

Edward smiled and turned his head, capturing Jasper's lips with his own. "In my toiletry bag," he whispered against Jasper.

"Mm. Dessert with breakfast," Jasper mused, kissing him again deeply. "I like it."

Edward kissed him back and shifted as Jasper pulled away, reaching for the cart. "What's for breakfast?"

"Why? Eager to get to dessert?" Jasper teased. He poured what turned out to be champagne into a flute, and topped it with orange juice.

"You know how I like my sweets," Edward teased back as he accepted the mimosa.

Jasper laughed softly. "Scoot over," he urged.

Edward moved toward the center of the bed and Jasper sat Indian style next to him, his back to the windows with the room service cart at his elbow. Edward watched as Jasper uncovered the plates and set them next to himself on the bed. First appeared a bowl of diced fruit, which seemed to be mostly melon chunks. Next was a plate of French toast, cut into sticks and a small dish of what looked to be warm maple syrup. There were biscuits and jam, scrambled eggs and bacon, and pastries.

Jasper picked up a piece of melon between his fingers and offered it to Edward. "This could get messy," he cautioned.

"So?" Edward nipped the fruit from his fingers with his teeth, but ran his tongue over the pad of Jasper's thumb, catching a drop of juice that had run from the fruit. He chewed and swallowed, and offered Jasper a grin. "We have housekeeping service."

Jasper returned the grin and plucked a strawberry from the bowl and made a show of eating it slowly. Edward smirked; he could get behind this kind of seduction.

He sat back and let Jasper feed him. The syrup from the French toast dripped down Jasper's fingers and wrist and onto Edward's t-shirt. When Jasper tried to pull his hand away, Edward grabbed it and slowly licked him clean, the sweet of the syrup mixing with Jasper's unique taste on Edward's tongue. Jasper fed himself in between offering bites to Edward. Fluffy bits of scrambled eggs were easily tongued from Jasper's fingers, or piled onto a bite of biscuit with a bit of bacon.

Jasper refilled their mimosas twice through the extended meal, and Edward was feeling slightly buzzed and nearly stuffed when Jasper popped the last bit of French toast into his mouth. The pastries had been left untouched, and Edward watched as Jasper moved them, along with the dirty dishes, back onto the cart and nudge it away.

"You're all sticky," Jasper pointed out. "Maybe you should take your shirt off."

Edward laughed outright. "Smooth, Jas," he said with a chuckle as he shrugged out of his stained t-shirt and tossed it over the side of the bed.

"I try," Jasper said modestly with a shrug.

"Are you going to join me?" Edward asked.

"In a minute," Jasper answered. "Get comfy." He kissed Edward then rose smoothly. "Be right back."

Edward stretched out, using his feet to push the rumpled bed linens to the floor as he slumped down into the bed. He listened to Jasper rummage around in the bathroom, and then sat up and slid from the bed to do a bit of rummaging of his own. From the backpack he retrieved his iPod, and he scrolled through the playlist options as he limped toward the bureau and the docking system that was plugged in there. The soft jazz filled the room just as Jasper emerged from the bathroom, shirtless, containers in each of his hands.

"That doesn't look very comfortable," Jasper said, nodding at where Edward was standing next to the bed.

"I was getting there," Edward responded with a smile.

"Mm," Jasper agreed indulgently. "Go lay down. I'm owed dessert."

"_You're_ owed?" Edward asked, raising an eyebrow.

"Yup. For that, you can take off your pants, too." Jasper ordered.

"Yes, sir," Edward responded, slipping his fingers into the elastic waist band at his hips and easily sliding the flannel down. He hadn't bothered with underwear the night before, and he easily stepped out of the pants when they pooled at his ankles.

Jasper's grin turned slightly predatory as Edward flopped back onto the bed. "Close your eyes," Jasper urged.

Edward did, and then felt Jasper's hands on his hips and legs, moving him so he was stretched out along the length of the bed. Jasper's fingers skimmed over his body and Edward shivered as the warm touch landed on random spots on his body.

"Your gift wasn't all I bought," Jasper said lowly, his voice somewhere in the vicinity of Edward's pelvis. "Keep your eyes closed."

Edward nodded. The heat was still up in the room, so he was comfortable naked. He listened carefully, but couldn't identify the sounds. He strained to hear, listening for some clue of what was coming, and the first wet, cool stripe down his abdomen took him by surprise and he gasped at the unexpected feeling.

Like Jasper's touch a moment before, the cool wet contact hit at varying intervals and with different applications. Some tickled, some were firm, and others felt like something was being poured over his skin. The liquid was cool on his nipples, but the sensation was quickly replaced by something warm and rough and it took Edward only a heartbeat to recognize the feeling as Jasper's tongue.

Jasper's lips were on Edward's lips next, and Edward kissed him back, tasting something fruity. When Jasper pulled away, Edward licked his lips, frowning slightly, trying to identify the flavor, but unable to label it.

"You're all sticky again," Jasper said, brushing his nose (Edward guessed by the breath wafting across his cheek) along Edward's jawline. "Guess I'll have to clean you up," he mused, pulling away.

The vacation was certainly drawing out a side of Jasper Edward hadn't encountered before. Though attentive, Jasper was normally reserved, at least vocally, during intimacy, so the playfulness was something new, and Edward decided he kind of liked it.

Just as whatever it was had gone on randomly and with different applications, Jasper used his tongue at random intervals to lick, nip, and suck the substance from Edward's body. Jasper's stubble was rough against Edward's skin, a surprising contrast after a gentle caress, or the sharp scrape of teeth. Edward's senses were on high alert trying to predict each new contact, and his body responded eagerly to Jasper's. He felt his skin flush, heat creeping up his body as he hardened under Jasper's assault.

"Looks like I missed a spot," Jasper said lightly. "Keep your eyes closed, baby," he warned.

Edward whimpered quietly as the cool substance hit his cock, and he felt it trickle down and he squirmed slightly as it ran down the V of his pelvis and pooled uncomfortably under him.

"Oops," Jasper muttered, absolutely no heat behind the words. "Looks like I made a mess."

Edward could hear the smile in Jasper's voice when he urged Edward to bend his knees and put his feet flat on the bed.

The squirming started anew when Jasper's tongue started making long sweeping strokes over his thighs, moving ever so slowly closer to Edward's erection. Heavy breaths over Edward's over-heated skin mixed with the rough smoothness of Jasper's tongue and occasional scrape of teeth over the tender flesh on the inside of Edward's thighs. Another whimper escaped Edward's lips when Jasper's tongue flattened over his perineum and Jasper licked his way up to the head of Edward's cock in one smooth motion.

"Mm," Jasper breathed. "You smell good," he said, burying his nose in the juncture of one of Edward's legs and hips. "And you already tasted good. This was just bonus," he explained, as his tongue went back to work, short lazy laps against Edward's skin. "Edward-colada," Jasper whispered, half to himself with a soft laugh.

"Jasper," Edward whined with a laugh.

Jasper nipped lightly at his thigh in response, but Edward felt him shift up, and a warm hand encircled his hip. The bed moved as Jasper resettled, and the only warning Edward had before Jasper took him into his mouth was the wash of warm breath over him. Jasper used his tongue in several different ways as his mouth moved over Edward's cock. Edward came with a strangled whimper.

When he opened his eyes a moment later, Jasper was kneeling between his legs, looking extremely pleased with himself, but also extremely turned on, his eyes bright, cheeks pink, and a very obvious tent in the thin pajama bottoms he was still wearing, wiping his mouth with the back of his hand. Edward sat up and tugged Jasper forward, kissing him deeply. Jasper kissed him back, but only briefly. He cupped Edward's cheek and disengaged the kiss.

"Water?" he asked hoarsely and Edward fumbled for one of the bottles on the bedside table, uncapping it and handing it over. Jasper drank half the bottle in a few long pulls while Edward's hands skimmed over the bare skin of Jasper's flank.

"Better?" Edward asked when Jasper set the bottle aside.

Jasper hummed an affirmative and returned the kiss in earnest. Edward's hands slipped into Jasper's pants as they exchanged hungry kisses and Jasper rose when Edward tugged them down over Jasper's hips. He gave his lover a brief warning look and tackled Jasper down onto the mattress with a laugh, kissing him again deeply before slithering down his body and worshiping Jasper with the same attention he'd just received.

They exchanged lazy kisses and tender touches while basking in Jasper's afterglow before the sticky residue of Jasper's fun began to drive Edward crazy and they adjourned to the bathroom. The tub wasn't quite big enough for them to share, so they showered together instead. They took gentle care with each other, Jasper scrubbing off the bits of body paint he'd missed, and Edward just enjoying the opportunity to have his hands all over Jasper. They lingered until they were flushed pink again and turning pruney.

Since they'd made a mess of the sheets, Jasper rang down to the desk for a few extra blankets, and they arrived just as they were wrapping towels around their waists, their hair scrubbed mostly dry. Edward and Jasper curled up together naked under their clean blankets. Edward snuggled up to Jasper's side, resting his head against the blonde's shoulder with Jasper's arm draped over his waist.

Edward idly drew patterns on Jasper's arm with his finger. "You seem a bit – freer, here," he commented softly. "I haven't seen you so excited about things as you were yesterday."

Jasper nodded and shrugged. "I think part of it is that I know that I'll never see any of these people again. Back home, there's always a chance that we could run into students while we're out in town. And I guess I've just been so used to closing myself off that unless we're truly alone, it's hard to let myself be completely open. Even with your family, there's part of me that's held back."

Edward had noticed that, with the exception of perhaps Bella. "You're afraid of being hurt again."

"Yeah, to a degree. The more anyone knows the more they have to hurt me with. I do love your family, and I know that I can trust them, but…"

"But it's been a long time since anyone has shown you unconditional trust and love." Edward finished Jasper's sentence.

Jasper nodded, and rested his cheek on Edward's head. "Part of me also thinks that if I don't put myself out there too much that no one will have a reason to leave me, either," he admitted quietly.

"Jas," Edward started.

"I know," Jasper answered in a soft voice. "I've talked with Carlisle and he's given me a referral for a colleague, a therapist," he said. "I'm going to start seeing her when we get back." He lifted his head and nudged Edward gently so he was forced to meet Jasper's gaze. "I've got issues, baby," Jasper said frankly. "And they're not going to go away, no matter how much I try to ignore them or just move past them. I know, rationally, that you, Bella, your family, aren't going to leave me. But fear isn't necessarily rational."

"No, it's not," Edward agreed. "I'm proud of you, though, for taking this step."

Jasper shrugged, blushing lightly. "I want to be able to have a life with a partner," he whispered. "With you," he clarified. "And I can't do that if I'm always freaking out that you or your family are going to walk out the door without saying goodbye, or if I don't learn to trust myself and other people again."

Edward smiled softly and nodded, shifting over so he could give Jasper another kiss. "I will support you however I can," he murmured against Jasper's lips. "Because I want to be able to have that life, too."

"Two point five kids, dog, picket fence?" Jasper asked softly, a teasing edge to his voice.

Edward laughed quietly. "I'm allergic to dogs, so how about cats instead?"

"Mm. Cats it is then." Jasper paused. "I know we've kind of talked about it before, but do you want to have a family?"

Edward nodded slowly. "Yeah. Someday." Sometime in the past few months Edward had decided that he'd like to have a family. Kids. Maybe not biologically his, but someone to pass on his family's traditions to. Emmett and Rose would need someone to run interference for their kids with the grandparents. "I hadn't thought much about it when I was younger, since I was travelling or practicing all the time. But I think that's all pretty much behind me, now."

Jasper shifted and they resettled, Edward leaning on Jasper. "Playing professionally?"

Edward nodded as he snugged himself against Jasper's side. "Back at Thanksgiving, I was working on some demos," he explained. "I sent them off to some friends in the music department at UW. Basically, I'd have to dedicate too much of my time getting back into shape to play professionally again, and right now, I have more important things in my life. I'm happy where I'm at – I like the school, and surprisingly I've even come to enjoy teaching. Performing…I don't miss it enough to go back to being the tortured musical loner I was in high school and college. I can play for my family, and for my students, and for now, that's enough."

Jasper smiled and kissed him softly. "I'm proud of you too, baby," he murmured.

Edward returned the kiss and relaxed with a quiet sigh, soaking up Jasper's body heat and presence. They chatted for awhile longer until the pauses between exchanges grew longer and Edward's eyelids begin to droop in the warmth of the room and the relaxed atmosphere. He was about to doze off when his phone rang, startling him awake. He eased out of Jasper's embrace and crossed the room, picking his phone up from the small table where he'd left it. The number on the display read the main number for Forks Academy. Frowning, he answered. "Hello?"

"Edward? It's Dean Harper."

Ah. Well, that explained it. "Yes, Dr. Harper. What can I do for you?" He shrugged at Jasper's questioning glance.

"I hate to bother you on your vacation, Edward, but I'd like to meet with you to discuss some changes."

Edward frowned. "Changes?"

"Nothing serious. At least not negatively so, for you. Are you available this week?"

"Actually, no," Edward answered. "I'm in San Francisco until Sunday."

"Next week, then? Tuesday, 11 am?"

"Sure," Edward agreed. "Is there anything I need to do to prepare?"

"Not at all, Edward. I'll see you on Tuesday. Enjoy the rest of your trip."

"Thank you, Dr. Harper."

Edward snapped his phone closed when he heard the Dean click off the other end.

"What was that about?" Jasper asked softly as Edward tossed his phone back down.

"I've no idea," Edward crossed back to the bed and climbed back in, snuggling down with Jasper to resume the nap that had been interrupted. "Apparently something is changing and the Dean needs to speak to me about it. But it'll keep," he said, throwing one of his legs over Jasper's, Jasper's answering laughter rumbling through their bodies as they dozed off.

Edward woke sometime later needing to pee. He gently untangled himself from Jasper and padded through the room. He left the lights out; despite the mid-day hour, the drapes were very efficient at blocking out the sunlight. When he returned to the bed, Jasper had shifted slightly and stretched out, taking up more space than Edward had thought possible. Smiling, he slipped back into bed and draped himself across Jasper.

Jasper's eyes opened slowly and he looked around blearily for a moment as if he needed to orient himself before he settled on Edward and smiled softly. "Now that's a view to wake up to," he teased, lightly smacking Edward's bare ass.

Edward squirmed. "Glad you appreciate it."

"You know I do," Jasper said back, giving him another light smack.

"I don't know," Edward hedged. "You may have to give me another demonstration so I can be sure."

Jasper snorted. "Subtle."

Edward shifted so their chests were pressed together, his chin on Jasper's collar bone. "I want you to fuck me," he whispered in Jasper's ear.

"Yeah, subtlety is really not your strong point," Jasper teased, his hands roaming over Edward's back."

"How do you figure, after all the dancing around each other we did those first few weeks?" Edward asked, arching into Jasper's touch.

"It wasn't really all that subtle," Jasper commented. "I had a sense about us from the start."

"Hm," Edward agreed. "Me too," he said before kissing Jasper deeply.

Words became unnecessary at that point. Edward responded to Jasper's non-verbal cues as Jasper lavished him with attention and care at prepping him. Edward had had his share of partners, but he'd never been with another man who'd cared so much about him in the build up to intercourse. He felt well and truly worshipped under Jasper's hands.

There was nothing hurried about their coupling. Edward's hands lingered when he unrolled the condom down Jasper's dick, and Jasper took his time with every movement, drawing out every sensation. Only as they both neared the point where they could no longer hold back did their movements become frantic as need overtook them.

Edward remained in the comfort of Jasper's arms as the perspiration cooled on their bodies and their breathing returned to normal. He felt Jasper's nose pressed against his neck, his breath washing over Edward's skin. Edward's hands skimmed Jasper's arms, or back over his thighs as they lay together.

Jasper sighed softly, pressing a kiss to Edward's pulse point before he rolled away. Edward swallowed a groan at the loss of contact and he felt Jasper stretch behind him. He rolled over onto his back, turning to look at Jasper.

His lover turned back toward him and smiled, leaning in to kiss Edward softly. He drew Edward back into his arms and Edward laughed quietly as he went willingly. Jasper had disposed of the condom in the bin next to the bed and Edward curled against him, their legs tangling together.

Hunger eventually drove them back into the shower and out of the room. After a quiet dinner, they decided to walk a little, needing a different kind of exercise after their day spent in bed, and it was still fairly early in the evening.

They walked hand in hand, Edward relying on Jasper's sense of direction to get them back to the hotel. "Are you ready for next semester?" he asked as they wandered.

Jasper shrugged one shoulder. "I'm excited for a couple of classes, but I'm not sure I'm ready to go back," he admitted. "It's going to be hard to go back to living by myself again, more or less."

"Yeah," Edward agreed. He wasn't looking forward to that part either. "But it's not like we're never going to see each other," he said, attempting to find some way to prove to himself and Jasper that it wouldn't be the end of the world. "We'll still have dinner every night, and we'll have the weekends…"

Jasper squeezed his hand and smiled a bit. "You sound like you're trying to convince yourself."

Edward nodded. "I am. I don't think it's working."

Jasper dropped his hand and wrapped his arm around Edward's waist. "We'll make it work, babe. We made it work last semester."

"Last semester we didn't know what we were missing," Edward said with a pout.

Jasper kissed his temple. "True enough. It's going to be hard; you're going to be travelling some, and it'll be difficult getting used to not having you there every night, but we'll make it work. It's only a few months, right?"

Edward nodded again. "Yeah." He paused. "Maybe we should think about looking for a place next fall…"

"If I'm still here," Jasper said quietly. "I mean –"

"I know what you mean, love," Edward responded softly. There was always a chance the board wouldn't approve Jasper's promotion to the full time tenured positioned left open by Dr. Palmer's retirement.

"I don't know that I'd leave, even if they don't approve me," Jasper explained. "I like it in Forks. I love you, and I wouldn't walk away from that just because of a job. I don't need the job, really. Not for the money, anyway. That's not what's important."

"But you love teaching. I don't want you to give that up for me," Edward protested.

"It's a job, Edward. There are other schools, or I could write. I'm not without options, and like I said, that's not what matters to me. I want to be with you; I'll figure something out, if that's what it comes down to. But if for some reason I can't stay in Forks, if I need to go to Seattle or Port Angeles, I want you to have the option of staying on campus. But it's too soon to be thinking what ifs. The board won't even be making a decision until after Spring break."

Edward nodded and sighed. "I know."

"Okay." Jasper kissed him softly. "So quit worrying about it. We've got two weeks before school starts, and we just have to make the best of it while we can."

"Okay," Edward said quietly. They walked silently for a moment, Jasper's arm dropping from Edward's waist to take his hand again. "So, what classes are you excited about," Edward said finally, breaking the brief silence.

Jasper laughed quietly and started talking about the Civil War elective he would be teaching. His excitement about the course was palpable, and Edward could clearly understand where Jasper's historical passion was. They continued to walk and talk as they sky darkened and the lights in the buildings came on. Edward filled Jasper in on the two festivals he had scheduled for the Jazz band, both in February. The first two weeks of the semester would be incredibly busy for Edward, since he'd only have two weeks getting the band ready for the trip to Salem.

They stopped for a bit of dessert and nightcap in the hotel bar before ending their night much like they'd spent the day, naked and curled up together after asking for a wakeup call early the next morning.

They woke early on Wednesday and grabbed coffee and pastries (well, bagel for Jasper) at the Starbucks in the lobby before setting off for the rental car office. Jasper seemed content to let Edward drive while he navigated, which suited Edward just fine.

It was a nice drive once they were out of the city and cleared traffic, and once they hit the smaller highway, it was smooth sailing. They took the coastal highway up through wine country to Calistoga, where Edward had made reservations for a couples' mud bath and massages for them. After the pampering, they went on a wine tasting tour and had a great late lunch in a small Italian restaurant. Edward bought a couple of bottles of wine from the vineyard where they'd tasted to take home to Esme.

It was late when they made it back to the city, but they were both so completely relaxed that they didn't worry about it.

Thursday they again took the opportunity to sleep late and order room service. After breakfast they dressed casually, but warm, and Edward let Jasper lead the way. The spa day had been Edward's idea, so Jasper had free reign over Thursdays' activities. Jasper packed up the backpack, grabbed a couple printed schedules, and they were off.

Their first stop was on the Muni again, and they got off in walking distance to a large grocery store. Jasper led the way to the deli and they each ordered a sandwich. Jasper picked out a couple bottles of pop and some fresh fruit and stuffed everything into the backpack, not letting Edward peek inside.

They got back on the train and rode for what seemed like a long time. At the end of the line, they finally got off, and Edward was surprised to find them at the beach. Jasper took his hand and led him over to a small coffee shop. Edward ordered a mocha and Jasper got a straight black coffee. Before they stepped back outside, Jasper reached into the backpack and pulled out two ball caps, easing one down on Edward's head, then his own after smoothing his hair back. Then he took Edward's hand and led him down the beach.

From the backpack, Jasper pulled a blanket, their bag of groceries, and two small packages wrapped in vinyl.

"What are you up to?" Edward asked finally as Jasper passed over one of the vinyl packages.

"We're flying kites," Jasper stated simply as he unwrapped his kit.

Edward followed suit, finding all the pieces he needed inside the kit and began to assemble his kite. The weather was perfect, a light breeze and a bright clear day over the bay made it chilly, but seemed just right. It took them awhile to get the kites put together, and they weren't the only ones who had the idea, despite it being the middle of the week.

They flew kites for several hours, stopping to eat and lay back and watch others, or the water. Hand in hand they walked along the beach until they were cold and their cheeks were beginning to get wind burned. Jasper checked his schedule and led them back to the train so they didn't have to wait long to catch one.

Jasper led them off at the Castro Street Station, and they took their time wandering. Jasper had made reservations for them for dinner closer to their hotel, so they merely walked through the district (and did some shopping), before making their way back to transportation to get them back to the hotel. After a quick shower and change, they set off again for a quiet romantic dinner.

The meal was very nice; they shared a bottle of wine and quiet conversation about nothing in particular, and lingered as long as their very polite server let them. The wind had picked up while they ate, so Jasper and Edward walked huddled close together to keep warm.

Their hands started wandering when they hit the elevator, and didn't stop even after they were both sated and basking in the afterglow of their release. They seemed to have a need to keep touching each other, and they fell asleep with a reassuring grasp on each other.

They had decided to leave most of the touristy stuff for one day, so they could grab souvenirs without having to clutter the hotel room. Friday morning they set of fairly early, taking BART to the Embarcadero before they headed down to Pier 39, Fisherman's Warf, and Ghirardelli square.

It was a long day of walking, but Edward wouldn't have traded it for anything. They walked through the Ferry building and did a bit of shopping, before moving on the Pier by walking down the Embarcadero. They took the aquarium tour (which reminded them both of their first date) and grabbed clam chowder in sourdough bread bowls and watched the sea lions. After lunch they took the ferry across to Alcatraz for the tour.

They walked along Beach Street to Ghirardelli Square. Edward bought way more chocolate than Jasper (though he noted that Jasper did pick up a few things). As they walked back down to the beach, they stopped for a light meal from one of the many vendors, and took it down to the beach. It was growing late and cooling down, but they didn't mind as they sat close together on the sand and had their supper, their shopping bags piled at their feet.

They remained on the beach until well after dark, watching the stars appear over the bay and listening to the water. They didn't speak much, just enjoyed each other's quiet company and the sounds of people around them, and the water lapping up the shore. The sunset was brilliant over the horizon and Edward felt Jasper lean into him as they sat in the quiet and just watched. Eventually the late hour and their own near frozen bodies drove them to hail a cab rather than walk back to the BART station.

They made love one more time, falling asleep naked and still intimately connected with each other, but not before Edward remembered to call down for a wakeup call.

* * *

So, the boys are back to real life next week, after a short reprieve. Wonder what the Dean is up to... ~_^


	34. Chapter 33: A Change in Plans

**Thanks as always to my fantastic betas, Naelany and wishingforlove**

**This is another long one, folks. ^_^**

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The house was full and lit up when Jasper and Edward arrived home Sunday evening. Esme greeted them with hugs at the door and barely let them get their stuff upstairs before pouncing on them for details about their trip over coffee. Bella gave them each a kiss on the cheek before cuddling into Jasper's left side; Edward was on his right. Everyone swapped stories and souvenirs from their travels until late into the night. The reunion was boisterous and warm, and Edward hadn't thought he'd missed his family until they were all back together again.

They all slept in on Monday and were treated to one last big family brunch before Esme had to go back to work at the school on Tuesday. The rest of them were putting in office time as well, getting things ready for the semester that started the following week. They were all moving back into the dorms on Saturday; the students would be arriving on Sunday with classes resuming on Tuesday.

Tuesday morning Edward and Jasper had a leisurely breakfast of cereal before heading back to campus. Edward had a meeting with the Dean and Jasper wanted to get some work done in his office. Edward agreed to meet Jasper in his office when he was finished and they'd grab lunch out before going back to the house.

They separated in the parking lot, and Edward limped off to the Dean's office. The administration building was unlocked, and his mom was sitting at her desk, the flowers from Jasper on the corner just behind her phone. "Hi, sweetheart," she greeted him, moving some files around her desk. "What are you doing here?"

"I have a meeting with Dean Harper this morning," he reminded her. "Is he in?"

"Oh, right." She waved him through. "I think he's expecting you."

"Thanks, mom," Edward said. He crossed the room and tapped on the Dean's door and entered when the Dean called out permission.

"Ah, Edward. Thanks for meeting me. Would you like some coffee?" The Dean waved him to a chair and rose from behind his desk.

"No problem. And yes, please," Edward responded, taking the offered chair.

Dean Harper poured Edward a cup and handed it over, gesturing towards the milk and sugar on the tray at Edward's elbow before he settle d in the chair adjacent to Edward's. "Edward, I'll just get right to it. Dr. Anderson is taking an emergency leave of absence for illness. He plans to make his retirement formal before the end of the month. Unfortunately, we're not in a position to begin a search for a new replacement right now, being the middle of the academic year."

Pieces fell into place in Edward's mind. "What are you proposing?" He had an idea of what those changes were that he had spoken of on the phone.

"We'd like to have you take over the other performing ensembles. You would effectively be running all the bands, taking over the pre-existing tour schedule for the Wind Ensemble and Symphonic Band, on top of what you've already set up for your Jazz Ensemble. You'd continue teaching lessons, of course, and music history and theory. We'll find a part timer to take over the music appreciation classes, and other faculty have already agreed to take over John's other academic classes for this term."

Edward let out a slow breath. Two more ensembles was a lot of extra responsibility, especially considering the tour schedule that John Anderson liked to put together for his bands.

"Of course, your compensation package would be adjusted," Dr. Harper continued.

Edward waved him off. "I'm not worried about that, Dr. Harper. It's just a lot to have to take on at the beginning of the term."

"I understand that, Edward. If you don't feel ready to take on the extra groups, I would hope that you could assist us in a rush search to find someone until the Board can conduct a full search." The dean sipped from his coffee.

"I could give you a few names of people I know in the area," Edward agreed. "But before I can make a decision, do you have any idea about what the tour schedule looks like?" Edward wasn't worried about taking over the bands for the semester, but his own schedule was already full with two festivals and the spring break trip already on the books.

Dr. Harper nodded. "There was a trip with the Wind Ensemble planned for the end of the first week of classes, just into Pullman for the weekend. There's also the WMEA conference in Yakima in February. There are six students, I believe, who have been admitted to All State, and Dr. Anderson had applied and been approved for the Wind Ensemble to play. Also, the state solo competition in Ellensburg will be in April, and I believe several students have auditioned. Beyond that, the only other commitments I'm aware of are commencement in June, and the Master Class sessions with the Seattle and Portland symphonies later this spring."

The performance in two weeks time meant the band already had to be well prepared before the break, but it would still probably mean extra rehearsals once school started to get everyone back on track. Pullman was roughly 10 hours by bus, which meant they'd take off Friday, likely, for a performance on Saturday, and return on Sunday. The WMEA festival meant that Edward would be out of town for three of four weekends in February, but he knew that Jasper (and his family) would ultimately understand. The opportunity to run the other bands would mean that Edward could transition into being a full band director. While it wasn't something he'd necessarily dreamt of, it would give him a more secure position with the school in the long run, which would be nice, especially if Jasper were granted the full time position he would be considered for.

"I want to say tentatively, yes," Edward said slowly. "But I need some time to look at my calendar and see if I can make it work with my other commitments."

"You have other engagements?" The Dean looked somewhat surprised.

"Nothing professionally, but I have physical therapy and other regularly scheduled appointments I would need to adjust, and a partner I need to speak to about the additional demands on my time."

Dr. Harper smiled knowingly. "Please, take the evening to speak to your family and Dr. Whitlock. I do need a decision by tomorrow, however."

"I understand," Edward responded, not even wanting to know how the dean had put the pieces together to come up with him and Jasper. "I'll get back to you tomorrow."

"Thank you, Edward." They talked about the other details of Dr. Anderson's sudden departure and the rearrangement of resources to cover his absence over the rest of the coffee.

Edward kissed his mom's cheek on his way through. "I'm meeting Jasper for lunch. We'll see you back at the house later?"

Esme made an affirmative sound and nodded. "Bella said she'd make supper tonight, so you might want to call her while you're out to see if there's anything she needs."

"We will. See you later."

"Bye, sweetheart. Have a good lunch," Esme called after him.

Edward waved over his shoulder before he headed out into the drizzle that had started to fall. He moved as quickly as he could across to the humanities building where Jasper and Bella's office was. He took the stairs up to their floor and found Jasper working intently over his laptop, a cup of coffee at his elbow and the cords from his headphones trailing over his chest.

He made sure that Jasper could see him before Edward moved to stand behind him, resting his palms of Jasper's shoulders. "Hey, babe," Edward greeted him after Jasper had tugged the earbuds lose.

"Hey. How was your meeting?" Jasper tipped his head back and Edward met his eyes upside down.

"Interesting. We can talk over lunch. Ready to go?" Edward asked.

"Sure, let me just save this and pack it up so I can work on it a bit more this afternoon," Jasper said, a small furrow appearing between his eyebrows.

Edward kissed his forehead and stepped back so Jasper could sit back up and finish what he was working on. In a few short moments Jasper had his laptop packed into his messenger bag and they were setting off for Edward's car. They found their way to a popular chain restaurant and got a quiet seat near the back.

"So, what's up?" Jasper asked after the server brought their drinks and took their lunch orders.

Edward sighed softly. "Dr. Anderson's going to retire early due to illness, and they need to shuffle things around to cover for him. Dr. Harper has asked me to take over the two other performing ensembles."

Jasper nodded. "Okay. Is this good or bad?"

Edward shrugged and played with the condensation on the outside of his glass. "Good, I think. I guess. I don't know," he stammered. He took a deep breath and let it out slowly. "It could be a very good thing, especially if you're granted that full time position here. It would give me a bit more stability, and if I want to keep teaching, it'd be good for me to get that experience. But it's going to be a huge time commitment, Jas," Edward explained. "They've already got performances scheduled, and if I take it, I'll be gone most of the weekends in February."

"We'll make it work, if this is something you want, Edward, just like we'll make it work if I don't get the job," Jasper said softly. "It's a good opportunity for you, and I don't want you to pass on it just because of me. Or us. We'll be fine," he said with a soft smile.

"You won't see much of me for the next couple weeks," Edward spelled out. "I'll have scores to review and prep, and we'll probably have extra rehearsals when school starts, 'cause we're off to Pullman the first weekend."

Jasper rose slightly out of his chair and leaned across the table to kiss Edward softly. "Take the offer, Edward. I love you, and we'll sort the rest out later."

Edward took another long slow breath and nodded. "I still need to talk to my parents and see how all this work with Jane for PT and everything, but it feels right."

Jasper smiled at him. "I'm happy for you, Edward, truly. This sounds like it'll be a good chance for you, even if it means making things a bit rougher for us."

Edward swallowed his sigh of relief. He should have known that Jasper would be nothing but supportive. "Thanks, baby," he said quietly as their server brought over their meals.

"So, do we need to go back to campus and get stuff for you?" Jasper asked as they ate.

Edward made a negative sound around a bite of his burger. "I'll call John when we get home and see if he's got the scores or whatever and make arrangements to get them. I'll probably need to meet with him this week and get everything sorted out."

"I'll help you with whatever I can, Edward, and don't forget you've got your department resources to rely on, too," Jasper reminded him.

"Yeah, I'll need to hook up with Angela at some point and go over everything." Edward scrubbed a hand through his hair. The sheer amount of work that he was facing seemed daunting, though part of him was looking forward to the challenge. The other part of him was dreading being overwhelmed and failing.

"Don't forget to ask for help, Edward," Jasper chided quietly, making Edward wonder once again at their connection. "You don't have to do anything on your own."

"I'll try to remember," Edward promised. "So, how was your morning?" He asked, changing the subject.

Jasper laughed softly at Edward's lack of subtlety. "Well, I found emails informing me that I'd be taking over the supervision of the intramural swim team as well as co-advising the history club. So I've got a book to read to get caught up to where the club is at, since they've had all break to read it. I'm going to fake my way through coaching the swimmers for now but I don't know that they'll mind or notice," he said with a roll of his eyes. "Other than that, I got three syllabi revised for this semester."

"Sounds like you're going to be busy, too," Edward said.

"Yeah. Maybe it's good that we'll be busy together?" Jasper suggested.

"Probably so," Edward agreed. "At least it means less time to mope about not being together," he offered.

Jasper laughed softly. "True enough."

The server brought by their bill and Jasper paid, leaving cash in the vinyl folder before they slid from the booth. Edward called Bella from the car to see if she needed anything from the store while they were out, and she turned the question back on him since she was already there. They argued for a few minutes while she refused to tell him what she was making for supper, and Edward hung up, laughing.

Once they got back to the house (after a stop at the bookstore for Jasper to find the book the history club would be discussing), Jasper settled at the dining room table with his laptop to get back to work on his prep, and Edward left him there with a kiss while he went upstairs to their room to call John Anderson and grab the materials he'd already brought home.

He took a seat at his desk and opened his computer while he waited for Dr. Anderson to pick up the other line.

"Hello?"

"Dr. Anderson? It's Edward Cullen, from Forks Academy?" Edward introduced himself.

The other band director laughed softly. "Yes, Edward. I expected your call. I'm guessing that you're wanting to get my scores and such?"

Edward smiled. He'd always liked the other man's direct approach. "Yes, if it's not too much trouble. I was also wondering if we might be able to meet to go over your programs and talk a bit about the bands?"

"Of course. How does tomorrow afternoon suit you? We could meet over coffee? I'll bring the scores and all the information you'll need."

"That sounds perfect," Edward responded, and then proceeded to set a specific time and place before disconnecting the call. He gathered his things and traipsed back downstairs to join Jasper, Emmett, and Rosalie at the table while Bella's laptop marked her spot while she was busy in the kitchen.

"Where's Alice?" Edward asked as he claimed the empty space next to Jasper, who had plugged in his headphones again, but offered Edward a smile.

"Our fair cousin is at the studio," Emmett responded. "She had a project she wanted to finish before the semester starts."

"Sounds like her," Edward commented, getting his stuff organized and reaching for the coffee pot and a clean mug in the center of the table, and a cookie.

They didn't talk much as they worked, though everyone chorused thanks when Bella brought in a fresh pot of coffee and some cut up veggies and dip when she settled down to start her own semester prep. Everyone worked for a couple of hours, and Alice joined them when she got home. Edward cleaned up his syllabi for his music theory and music history classes, then started reviewing the available information about the Wind Ensemble and Symphonic bands that the dean had emailed him. He found several students that overlapped with his Jazz Ensemble, which made him feel a little better about stepping into Dr. Anderson's shoes. He and Jasper nudged at each other under the table as they worked, though Jasper appeared absorbed in his music and work.

They were all still hard at work around the table when Esme and Carlisle returned home shortly after five in the evening. Bella went to check on dinner after greeting her surrogate parents and Edward and everyone else started cleaning up so they could eat together at the table.

"So, how was everyone's day?" Carlisle asked as they began to eat the huge pile of fajita fixings Bella had prepared.

"Got a lot done," Emmett responded, serving himself. "I've got more classes this semester, since I don't have football."

"I had a meeting with the Dean," Edward put in. "Dr. Anderson is taking early retirement, and they've asked me to take over his ensembles this semester."

"Are you going to take it?" Bella asked.

"Probably," Edward answered. "It's going to make me very busy for the first part of the semester, and I don't know that it'll get better later." He felt Jasper's hand land lightly on his thigh.

"As much as we've gotten used to having you around more," Carlisle said. "You should do what's going to make you happy. Your mother and I will cope with having to see you less and having more time to ourselves."

Esme smacked Carlisle's shoulder. "What your father i_means_/i to say," she said to Edward, "is that we'll support you in whatever you decide."

"Thanks," Edward answered. "I'll be meeting with John tomorrow to go over everything and then letting the Dean know my final decision, which will probably be yes."

"Good for you," Alice chirped. "You'll be brilliant."

"Yeah, well, we'll see about that," Edward mumbled. Jasper kicked him under the table.

Alice talked a little about how her love and family project was going and what she'd be teaching in the spring. Bella let them know what authors had confirmed for her conference (Edward hid a grin behind his fist when Jasper bounced a little at the announcement about Izzy), and Rose filled them in on some of the wedding plans she'd worked out with Emmett and Alice.

The rest of dinner passed in jovial conversation and once the dishes were done, everyone split up with their respective partners. Carlisle and Esme remained downstairs to watch television while Edward and Jasper disappeared back into their room.

Jasper got up and left early Wednesday morning, leaving Edward to make his phone calls to see about rearranging his schedule. Jane was able to move his therapy appointments to a break Edward worked into his schedule on Monday, Wednesday, and Friday mornings. It wasn't ideal, because he knew that going back to work after therapy was putting himself (and his students) into a possibly volatile situation. But it was the best he could do for the time being, until Jane and Dr. Card decided to reduce his sessions.

The house was quiet while Edward worked a bit before going to his meeting with Dr. Anderson. Everyone else was putting in office time at the school, getting copies ordered and such. He fixed himself a sandwich for lunch and ate over his laptop as he made notes for the Jazz Ensemble who had their first festival the second weekend of classes in Salem.

Edward made sure he had a notebook and his computer when he left to meet Dr. Anderson. He ordered a cup of coffee and a brownie and found an empty table, having arrived a few minutes early. He took out his notebook and calendar and started making revisions to what he knew had already been settled (Jane) and lining up when he'd be able to offer lessons.

"Hello, Edward," Dr. Anderson greeted him, a cup of coffee in hand. "It's nice to see you."

"You too, John," Edward responded, waving him into the seat opposite him. It was then he saw the tag on the herbal tea peeking from the lid on his cup. "I wish it were under better circumstances." Given both of their positions at school, they rarely saw each other, socially or professionally.

"As do I," John said with a half smile. "But, we can only take things as they come, yes?"

"Very true," Edward said, raising his cup in silent toast to his colleague.

"So, I expect that Robert has filled you in on what's required of you, should you accept the position?" John asked, setting his bag in his lap and shuffling through the contents.

"We talked yesterday," Edward answered with a nod. "And I would only be taking over the bands. He's redistributing your classes to others in the department until he can better restructure for the fall."

Dr. Anderson hummed an affirmative sound as he pulled out a sheaf of papers. "Yes, that sounds about right. I did recommend you for it, Edward. You're more than ready to take on the responsibility. You had excellent training in your undergraduate program, and your professional career, however short lived, makes you slightly more qualified than the others in the department. Though an advanced degree would not go amiss eventually," he counseled as he shuffled through his documents.

"Thank you," Edward answered sincerely.

John waved him off as he handed Edward two folders. "These are the scores I've prepared for both bands. The Wind Ensemble will be playing in Pullman next weekend. It's just a small exhibition with a master class with some of the faculty and graduate students. It's more of an opportunity for the students to think about pursuing a major in music kind of close to home. They had one such trip to Seattle last semester. I've included the sample recordings the publishers sent with the score."

Edward nodded as he absorbed the information, flipping open the top folder and quickly thumbing through the stack of scores.

"The band is ready for that performance, though they are expecting some extra rehearsals, having it come so quickly on the heels of vacation," John said. "The next big event for them is Washington Music Educators Association which is also the weekend of the Allstate concert. Fortunately, they're in the same place. You have six students going to All State; their information is here," John said, holding out another folder. "The Wind Ensemble's program is put together; they'll just need some tightening up. You've got…four weeks? Three? I don't know, it's the 12 of February."

Edward glanced at his calendar. "Three," he said quietly. It was January 20. He swallowed a mouthful of coffee harshly. He had one week to prepare for three solid weekends of performances, two with a band he'd never stood in front of.

John nodded. "The only other big thing coming up is the State Solo competition, but that's not until April. I'm sure you know the procedure, going through regionals and then the state. Registration for the regionals closes this weekend, but the students know that they're more or less on their own for the actual competition which will be around the end of February, first of March, I don't remember, exactly."

Edward made a note. Bella's conference was the first weekend in March and he'd already committed to that. "Do you usually accompany students to the regionals?"

"Only if they request it. Dr. Brightling goes with all of her students, but they're much younger. Why?"

Dr. Brightling was in charge of the 'elementary' music program for the school and worked with the students who had less experience or were in the lower grades. Fortunately, Edward thought, he wouldn't have to worry about those students at the moment. The Wind Ensemble was audition only which limited the students to those of a certain skill set, and though the symphonic band was open to all, most of the younger students were too uncertain of their skills to try joining the larger group.

"I have a prior commitment to that weekend, is all. Dr. Swan's writer's conference, and I've already promised to help," he explained.

"Ah," Dr. Anderson answered with a nod and a wink. "It shouldn't be a problem. If anything, their private instructors should go with them, but I think most might want to be unstifled by having their teacher looking over their shoulder."

Edward nodded. It made sense to him; he'd always hated having someone lurking around backstage for him while he was auditioning.

"The symphonic band will just keep working on their one big concert for this semester," John continued. "The concert's already scheduled for April, but you know that, since we'll have the Jazz groups on Friday night and the others on Saturday. Are you doing the faculty feature?"

Edward nodded. "I had planned on putting together a combo for the jazz evening, and was going to ask you about including a few feature pieces on the concert band night but…"

"It's yours now, boy," John said with a grin.

Edward wondered if the other man could see the panic creeping into Edward's eyes. He took a deep breath and let it out slowly.

"Edward," John said quietly. "I'd never have sprung this on you if I didn't think you could handle it. Angela has been taking care of all the administrative stuff. All you have to do is learn the scores and not let the kids see that you're nervous. Once you get through the early stuff with the Wind Ensemble, you'll need to program a new set for the concert in April, but I'm sure you'll do fine. And please, feel free to contact me."

Edward nodded again, his head swimming with all the details. Between the jump in responsibility and time crunch to get it ready, and knowing that he was going to be away from Jasper for four of the next five weekend when they'd been together for six weeks solid, he was beginning to rethink his decision. But he knew that Jasper (and Bella, likely) would kick his ass if those were the reasons he'd turned it down. He didn't want to turn it down, really. He just didn't know if he could handle it.

"Thank you," he said again. "I'll make sure to keep your number handy."

Dr. Anderson laughed. "Really, Edward, you'll do fine. The students know and respect you, and I've seen the way you run the jazz band. You're ready for this."

Edward smiled weakly. "I wish I had that same confidence in myself."

"The first time I got up in front of a group I nearly pissed myself," John confided. "I stammered my way through the notes I wanted to give the group, and I'm pretty sure I made no sense at all. But once the music started and I had the score in front of me, they followed. It was terrifying, but it was a thrill, too. You've already had that experience, Edward. You've been leading the Jazz band for three years. You can do this. Sure, you may not see your family or friends for the next couple weeks because I've dumped my crazy schedule on top of yours, but it's just a short amount of time. They'll understand."

"Yeah, they will," Edward agreed. He knew it would all work out, it just felt so overwhelming.

Dr. Anderson's watch beeped. "I have to get going, Edward," he said apologetically. "If there's anything I've forgotten, please let me know and we'll get it sorted. And don't worry," he said once again. "You'll do fine." He rose with a wink and picked up his bag, leaving Edward seated at the table with the stack of scores, a notepad full of scribbles and a calendar that was beginning to look like his enemy rather than a tool to keep him organized.

With a sigh, Edward pulled his phone from his pocket and stared at it for a moment. He knew his mind was already made up, but he still hesitated as he dialed the numbers for the school. When his mom picked up, he asked to be transferred to the Dean.

"Dr. Harper? It's Edward Cullen. I'll confirm that yes." After a few more minutes of small talk, Edward disconnected the call. Excitement and dread rolled through him with a sickening kind of anxiety and he had to fight to keep his breathing steady for a moment as all the ramifications of what he'd just done sunk in. Once he felt more steady, he packed everything up, and after a quick stop, made his way back to his parents' house.

The house was still empty and quiet when he got back. Edward left the downstairs dark and made his way up to his room, dropping his bag at his desk while he slumped into the chair. He probably should have gone to the school to coordinate things with Angela, but instead, he dug out his laptop and sent her an email, wanting to meet with her in person. Then he plugged his headphones into the computer, queued up the CD that Dr. Anderson had burned for him and just listened to the music that he'd selected for the Wind Ensemble's performance.

Edward soaked up the music, mentally making notes as he listened. He hadn't played with concert bands very often when he was in high school, unless there was a need for an extra percussionist who could play mallet parts, or the odd piano part, so two of the pieces were brand new to him. The others he'd heard before, though not in band arrangement. He listened to the set twice before he pulled out the scores to study while he listened, pencil in hand.

He jumped when warm hands landed on his shoulders.

"Sorry," Jasper laughed. "I didn't realize you had the volume turned up so high," he said when Edward removed the earbuds.

"It's okay," Edward said, turning in his chair to face Jasper, who was kicking off his shoes into the corner. "I'm just trying to get started on this."

"So the meeting went well?" Jasper leaned against the bed for balance as he tugged on his cowboy boot slippers. It seemed he was never in the house without them.

"Yeah. I'm not sure I'm any more prepared than I was yesterday, but it was good." He stretched his arms up over his head with a quiet sigh.

Jasper slid back onto the bed, his long legs hanging over the edge. "What's wrong, babe?"

"I haven't been in front of a group this size since I was an undergrad and had to do a conducting internship," Edward said. "I'm a bit terrified about my ability to actually do this, and I've only got a week. Plus, it's non-stop for about six weeks. I'm going to be out of town nearly every weekend for the next six."

"Come 'ere," Jasper said, patting the bed next to him.

Edward rose and limped the few steps, falling onto the bed, letting Jasper wrap his arm around his waist and pull him close.

"What part is eating at you?" Jasper asked softly. "The being gone, or your belief that you're not good enough to do this? Just so I know in what direction I need to kick your ass."

Edward huffed a quiet laugh. "Both, I guess."

"Edward, they wouldn't have offered you the position if they didn't think you could do it. It may be your first time back in front of a group this size, but it's not like you've been in a conducting vacuum for the past five years."

"I know," Edward answered with a sigh. "And if this were just a mid-year change it wouldn't be so bad, but the trip to Yakima is a high stakes performance, not just for them, but the school. I don't want to fuck it up."

"That's why you've got the trip to Pullman to practice, right?" Jasper offered.

"I guess," Edward agreed. "Though it was supposed to be for the students, not the conductor."

"Semantics," Jasper responded with a wave of his hands. "You can't let yourself freak out about this, Edward. If you do, it's just going to carry over into your performance and then you really will fuck it up. You know these students, even if you don't have them in classes, you've been at the school for three years, and you know what they're like. They'll understand why the changes are being made and they'll work with you, I'd bet. Give them some credit, Edward. Give i_yourself_/i credit. You can do this."

Edward sighed. "I sure as fuck hope so."

Jasper kissed him softly. "Trust us to trust you, then. I don't expect it'll be an easy week, but you'll get settled in, and you'll be fantastic."

Edward just nodded and relaxed against Jasper. "And the other part?"

"I'll miss you, but we can't do anything about it. We can call and email while you're gone, and maybe we'll have to sneak in a weeknight date-night for the weeks you're out of town. It'll be hard, I don't have any doubts about that," Jasper said softly. "But it's just a few weeks, really, and we'll still have a chance to see each other."

"Yeah," Edward echoed. He was glad he'd met Jasper after his military career had ended; he wasn't sure he could be on the other side of this conversation with Jasper disappearing into a possible combat zone if their positions were different. "I'll miss you, too."

"See why I got you that bear?" Jasper teased lightly.

Edward managed a half smile and kissed Jasper deeply. Jasper's fingers threaded into Edward's hair as the kiss grew deeper and more heated. They broke apart after a moment and Jasper ran the back of his fingers down Edward's cheek. "We should go downstairs," Jasper said softly.

"Yeah." Edward kissed him again, then wormed out of Jasper's embrace. "Can we just try to spend as much time together as possible this week?" He asked softly. He hated the way that made him sound clingy, but he had a feeling Jasper would understand.

"Absolutely," Jasper answered. "I think that would be a very good idea."

They went downstairs hand in hand to join everyone else. After dinner they gathered to watch Jeopardy before splitting up. Edward and Jasper went back to their room. Despite it being early, they both changed for bed. Jasper curled up against the headboard with the book from history club and a pencil tucked behind his ear. Edward joined him after exchanging his contacts for his glasses and picking up his folder of music and pencil from his desk where he'd left them.

Edward hummed passages occasionally as he worked and Jasper muttered something under his breath every so often. Edward wasn't sure it was what he meant when he asked Jasper if they could spend as much time together as possible before school started again, but he couldn't demand anything more with the work they both had to get done.

The rest of the week passed in a blur of activity as the whole family got ready for the new semester to start. Everyone was trying to get their laundry done and pack up all their new belongings, while continuing their last minute lesson plans for the first week. Edward met with Angela to go over the trip details for both of the ensembles, and she somehow wheedled him into letting her take over his administrative paperwork so he'd have one less thing to worry about. He had a feeling she was going to be a life saver. Jasper and Edward tried to squeeze in as much time alone as they could. The rest of the family seemed to understand and let them be in the evenings after dinner.

Those evenings were the only time they had. Edward forced himself to take a break and spend time with Jasper while he could, though they were usually working on something as they curled up together. He knew they were both feeling the press of time as the weekend bore down on them and their responsibilities kicked in.

Friday night, those responsibilities were thrown out the window as Edward was determined that he and Jasper's last night of vacation wasn't spent working. He made sure to lock his bedroom door behind him as he ushered Jasper in, though he doubted that they'd be interrupted.

Edward turned Jasper and pressed his back against the door as Edward kissed him deeply. "I want to spend the night with you. No work, no books, no music. Just us. This. Here." He punctuated each word with a kiss as Jasper's hands curled around Edward's hips, steadying him. "I want to forget that the rest of the world exists for one night."

Jasper's quiet noise of agreement rumbled through both of their chests. Edward's cane fell to the floor, forgotten as Jasper began to strip Edward of his clothes. Edward's head tipped back slightly, Jasper's lips moving from his mouth up his neck to his ear as he started at the leather belt threaded through Edward's jeans. "Tell me what you want me to do to you," Jasper breathed, nipping at Edward's earlobe with his teeth. "How do you want me to make this all about us?"

"I want you to love me," Edward said. "I want to remember tonight when I'm gone for the next couple weeks. I just want to be with you." He sounded needy and demanding and Edward didn't care.

Jasper caressed his cheek with the back of his fingers and kissed him tenderly. "I can do that," he said softly. "I want to take a shower," he said, reaching for Edward's hand and tugging him along. "Join me?" he asked with a smirk as he started the taps.

Edward grinned and nodded and began to undress. He left his clothes in a heap by the door, Jasper's joining his as their layers were discarded.

They didn't do anything in the shower but warm up, relax, and get clean. Their touches were teasing, lingering, and longing, but for the most part remained above the waist as the water washed them clean of the dust of the day.

Jasper wrapped them both in large fluffy towels when they were finished, and Edward lingered in Jasper's embraces as the towel was tucked around him. Jasper didn't seem to mind, though, as he hugged Edward back nearly as fiercely as Edward lightly traced his nose over Jasper's collarbone, inhaling the scent of him and his body wash.

"Come on," Jasper said softly after a moment, breaking the steamy stillness of the bathroom. "I've got things I want to do to you."

The tone of his voice made Edward shiver despite the warmth in the room. He allowed Jasper to lead him back into the bedroom, the change in temperature causing gooseflesh to break out over his body.

"Lie down on your front," Jasper said quietly, smoothing his hands up and down Edward's arms, rubbing away the raised skin. He whipped away the towel from around Edward's waist and nudged him toward the bed. Edward did as he was instructed, stretching out on his stomach on the bed, wrapping his arms around a pillow that he tucked under his head.

Edward listened to Jasper rustle around in the bureau, and then move across the room to where he'd stored his toiletry kit (after moving everything into the bathroom) and dug for something else. Jasper set his prizes on the floor and kissed Edward's shoulder. "I'll be right back," he said softly. Edward heard the door unlock, open, and close, and soft feet descended the stairs.

After a few moments he heard his brother's voice boom down the hall. "Oh, gross, man. Put some clothes on!" Edward laughed softly as the bedroom door opened and then closed with a bit more force than necessary before the lock was clicked back into place. "You're wearing the towel at least, right?" he asked through his laughter.

"Would I risk running into your parents bare ass naked in the kitchen?" Jasper shot back.

"Why would my parents be naked in the kitchen?" Edward retorted.

"Smart ass," Jasper muttered, but Edward could hear the smile in his voice. "Can you keep your eyes closed, or should I blindfold you?" Jasper asked softly.

"Blindfold," Edward answered after a moment. He was disappointed that Jasper wanted to keep him in the dark when all Edward wanted to do was soak up as much time together as possible.

"Trust me," Jasper whispered, and Edward heard the rustle of fabric before something smooth was placed over his eyes and knotted behind his head. "Can you breathe?"

"Yes," Edward answered. The blindfold was high enough on the bridge of his nose that he could breathe, but not so high that he could peek out the bottom.

"Okay. Love you," Jasper said quietly and Edward felt his hand slide down his spine to rest just over the swell of his ass for a minute.

"Love you too," Edward answered. Jasper's hand disappeared and Edward heard noises he couldn't identify. Warm fingers trailed down his neck and then Edward jumped when something cold and wet followed in their path. The searing cold didn't last though, as it was soon followed by a different warm texture; Jasper's tongue. "I'm beginning to think you've got some kind of fetish about licking me," he teased.

Jasper laughed softly. "But you taste good," he answered, and when he nipped at Edward's ear, he got a sensation of both warmth and cold. "Turn over," Jasper urged.

Edward did as he was told and was rewarded with a kiss, Jasper's tongue cold against his before an ice cube was slipped into his mouth via Jasper's tongue. Edward let it melt in his mouth for a moment, swallowing the liquid before passing it back to Jasper. His partner broke the kiss and Edward heard a crunch and Jasper's lips were back on his and his mouth was flooded with tiny bits of ice. Jasper's cool mouth moved on, kissing and nipping his way down Edward's stubbled jaw, but he felt something press against his lips. Edward opened his mouth and accepted the offering, which turned out to be a frozen blueberry. He let it melt and soften on his tongue and searched out Jasper with his hand.

Jasper seemed to get what Edward wanted when he found his arm and tugged, and Edward shared another cool, but blueberry flavored kiss with Jasper.

"Mm," Jasper murmured. "I should give you a few more of those," he said. Edward let Jasper feed him after he was teased with the small frozen orbs, Jasper's large hand rolling several of them over Edward's chest and belly.

He decided that Jasper must've been sucking on another ice cube because a trail of cold and warm went down his sternum to his belly button with the texture of Jasper's tongue. Edward gasped when Jasper's cool tongue poked into his belly button and swirled around. He felt Jasper's nose brush along his cock. "As interesting as that looks," Jasper said in a husky voice. "There's something else I want. Bend your knees and lift your ankles," he instructed.

Edward did, and he felt Jasper's hands, cooled from playing with the frozen treats, curl around his ankles, which were then settled on something Edward could only assume were Jasper's shoulders from the way his muscles stretched. He felt Jasper shift under him, his hand sliding up Edward's legs as he moved. Jasper shifted and Edward felt his body move at the same time. He heard the rattle of ice again, and what sounded like lube being opened. Something was placed under his hips, lifting him up.

Icy warm kisses were placed evenly up Edward's left thigh beginning at the knee. His legs lost elevation as Jasper leaned forward. He gasped then moaned as something cold and wet landed on his perineum and dripped back towards his hole. Edward whimpered and writhed as it was followed up by the dulled sensation of Jasper's tongue following it all the way down.

It had been ages since Edward had been rimmed, and even with his eyes closed his eyes rolled back slightly. His hands fisted in the sheets as he felt Jasper's tongue probe at him, teasing. Jasper's tongue was cold behind whatever he was using as a barrier, but it warmed quickly, and the sensations washed over Edward. His skin felt flushed and he had to release his grip on the bed covers to touch himself.

"Take off your blindfold, Edward," Jasper said breathlessly, his warm breath a contrast to the trail of ice moving over the V of his hip.

Edward didn't hesitate. He ripped what turned out to be a tie from his head, blinking in the low light of the room. Jasper was knelt between his legs. The lube was in his hand and he stretched up to kiss Edward. "I'm going to fuck you now. I'm hard just from watching you react to this," he said softly, his tongue tracing over the ice's path.

"Fuck yes," Edward breathed. He sat up as quickly as he could and kissed Jasper while he was unrolling a condom onto his dick. Jasper's left hand curled around the base of Edward's skull, holding him in place while Jasper kissed him desperately. He let himself be guided back onto the bed, Jasper not breaking the kiss until he was fully reclined.

"Touch yourself, baby," Jasper breathed as he reached for the lube once again. He poured a generous amount into his own palm, using one swift stroke to transfer some to Edward's throbbing erection before slicking himself with a quiet moan and a fluttering of his eyes.

"Jasper, please?" Edward all but whimpered as Jasper took his time. He didn't use his fingers to prep him, but the teasingly slow penetration was driving Edward nearly as mad as the rimming had moments before.

"Not gonna hurt you," Jasper protested, his voice low and rough as his hands curled possessively around Edward's hips. He continued the slow dance, Edward whimpering at each loss of contact, arching into Jasper.

Edward couldn't touch himself, it was just too intense. Jasper hissed as Edward's fingers brushed against his condom sheathed cock and it finally pushed him to where Edward wanted him. They both groaned as Jasper entered him, stopping to savor the moment of connection until Edward lightly thwapped his shoulder and ordered him to move.

It took Jasper only a few thrusts and a twist of his hips to find just the right spot to send Edward spiraling over the edge. Edward came over his hand making a mess of both of their bodies while Jasper still sought his release. He slipped his left leg from Jasper's shoulder and planted his foot on the mattress, lifting his hips slightly. Jasper growled quietly low in his chest and leaned forward, latching his lips to Edward's collarbone, giving a hard suck to the tender skin as he shuddered and stilled, sending another jolt of arousal through Edward.

Edward wrapped his arms around Jasper when the tension in his body seeped out and he slid down onto Edward, his cheek against Edward's chest. Edward's legs wound around Jasper's thighs and they just rested there, soaking up the contact with each other. Edward wanted to savor the moment for as long as possible, trying not to think about the long weekends ahead without Jasper, but they were looming too largely on the horizon for him to completely ignore.

He heard voices outside his door and he smiled when he heard Bella chasing Emmett off, admonishing him that he needed to give them private time.

"You know the next month isn't going to change the fact that I love you, right?" Jasper asked into the quiet.

Edward kissed the top of his head, what he could reach without having to move. "I know, baby," he assured him. The words were what they were going to have for the next several weeks, and Edward just hoped they were enough.

"You call me whenever you want," Jasper continued. "Especially in the middle of the night when you'll try to talk yourself out it."

Edward laughed quietly and hugged him tighter. "I will."

Jasper kissed his chest. After a few moments Jasper slipped out of Edward's embrace and tied off and disposed of the condom after gathering the other bits and pieces that had gotten dumped in the bed during their love making. He tossed the lube at Edward to tuck it conveniently under a pillow before Jasper slid back into the bed beside him with a damp cloth to clean them both up. He dropped it into the bowl that held half-melted ice cubes and he and Edward slid down under the covers with as much bare skin touching as possible.

Edward dozed, comfortably warm and secure in Jasper's arms, relaxed by both his presence and their performance. He felt Jasper melt down behind him, his breathing growing heavy as he succumbed to a light nap as well. He let himself drift.

He woke an hour or so later, startled by something but unsure what. He stretched, feeling comfortably sore in pleasurable places. Jasper stirred behind him, pressing his lips to Edward's bare shoulder. Then to the back of his neck. Edward turned in Jasper's arms so they were on their sides facing each other. They took a bit different slow track as they exchanged lingering touches and slow lingering kisses.

"Tell me what you want, Edward," Jasper said softly. The covers had been pushed back and they were both half-hard again, their need to be as connected as possible for the night surrounding them, putting a kind of charge into the air that only drove their need higher.

"I want to watch you," Edward said lowly in Jasper's ear. "Can you do that for me, lover? Let me watch you pleasure yourself?" It wasn't as if Edward didn't have enough fantasies to carry him through, or that he couldn't (or hadn't previously) conjure the image, but he wanted to see it.

"Fuck yes, Edward." Jasper stretched out on his back, his left leg bent at the knee, his dominant right hand drifting lazily over his chest and stomach. His cock grew harder as Edward watched, curving slightly to the left.

Edward shifted to one side and to the foot of the bed, letting Jasper take up as much room as he wanted. Jasper's left arm was flung over his head and Edward licked his dry lips as he watched Jasper's chest rise and fall as his breathing sped up a bit the closer his right hand came to fulfilling the goal.

"Tell me what you're thinking about," Edward urged quietly from his position against the wall. His own erection was beginning to demand attention but Edward ignored it, focusing on Jasper.

"You," Jasper answered after clearing his throat softly. His eyes were closed and he made a quiet noise low in his throat as he made a ring of his thumb and forefinger and slowly slid down his length after gathering the bead of pre-come at the head. His left hand moved, fumbling for the lube that was somewhere near the head of the bed. "You're wearing your glasses, sitting at the piano in a white shirt unbuttoned at the collar, your tie is loose around your neck, and tuxedo pants with suspenders," he elaborated. Jasper found the prize he sought and flipped the cap. "You're barefoot," he continued and he brought his hands together, lubing his right hand as he spoke, his voice low and rough.

"You're watching me over the top of your piano as you play." Jasper's hand curled around the base of his cock and he stroked up once, slowly, palmed the head and moved back down with a soft groan. "You stop playing and rise, hooking your thumbs in your suspenders, lowering them from your shoulders. Next you slowly work the knot loose from your tie and pull it around your neck from the fat end and let it slide through your fingers to the floor."

Edward soaked up Jasper's words, and the image of Jasper splayed out in front of him burned into his mind. He took a deep breath through his nose and let it out slowly (if somewhat shakily) as Jasper continued to speak and stroke himself.

"You're stalking toward me, your fingers smoothly working at unbuttoning each button down your shirt, revealing a scant trace of hair," Jasper said, his voice growing breathy. "You push it from your shoulders and let it flutter to the floor behind you. You're close enough to me that I can smell you now, and feel the heat from your body." His hand had started to move a little faster as Jasper spoke, his left caressing down his neck. "You reach out and touch me, your fingers ghosting over my neck. Your hand curls around my neck and you tug me out of my chair, your thigh between my legs, your hard cock brushing against me through your slacks."

Jasper's eyes moved behind his closed lids and his tongue darted from his mouth to lick at his lips. Edward watched, captivated.

"Your fingers trail up my face as I go down on one knee in front of you. You moan quietly as I nuzzle you, breathing hot air through the fabric of your tuxedo pants before I slowly lower the zipper and slip my hand inside to bring you out. One hand tangles in my hair, the other rests on my shoulder, one of my hands on your hip as I slowly take you into my mouth, wrapping my tongue around your length as I draw you in."

Edward groaned quietly, Jasper's words having an effect on him as much as his actions as he continued to stroke himself faster, the occasional hitch in his breathing tripping up his words.

"You're whispering to me as I suck you off, begging for more, saying how much you love me," Jasper pants, his voice grown slightly higher. His cheeks are pink, a flush spreading its way across his body. Edward can tell he's growing close. "I take you down as far as I can and you come with a moan of my name, and clutch at my hair and shoulder, my hands on your hips keeping you upright, oh," Jasper moaned. "So close, baby," he whispered, dropping out of the fantasy for a moment. "You, oh, fuck, Edward, join me on the floor on your knees, and you kiss me while- while – while you unzip my j-jeans."

Jasper didn't finish the fantasy. His back arched slightly, his head tipping back into the mattress as his neck extended the stretch as he came over his fist with a soft cry of Edward's name.

Edward shifted up onto his knees and stretched over the length of Jasper's body to kiss him deeply, a hand on Jasper's still bent left knee for balance. Jasper looked sleepy and sated when Edward broke the kiss, and Edward smiled as Jasper ran a finger down the side of his face.

"Thank you, baby," Edward whispered, kissing him again. He slid from the bed and padded to the bathroom for another warm damp cloth. He slid back into bed and tenderly cleaned Jasper before dropping the cloth carelessly over the edge of the bed and snuggling up to Jasper, tucking himself under Jasper's arm. He eventually dozed off, lulled by the gentle rhythm of Jasper's breathing while he traced slow lazy patterns on Jasper's back.

It was Jasper's warm lazy kisses that woke Edward sometime later. "You were neglected earlier," Jasper said soft and low in Edward's ears.

"I most certainly was not," Edward protested.

"You didn't get to come, and I saw how hard you were," Jasper continued, his lips warm and dry against the skin just behind Edward's ear. "You liked watching me get myself off, didn't you?"

Edward decided he really liked it when Jasper was more vocal during sex. He also really liked the way Jasper just kind of took control. Edward had been with other male tops before, but none had ever had the kind of gentle mastery that Jasper seemed to possess.

"Very much," Edward answered honestly. "I plan to remember that for as long as possible."

Jasper's chuckle rumbled through Edward's back and his breath washed across Edward's cheek. "What else would you like to remember? Do you want to keep the image of me going down on you?" he asked in a low seductive voice. "Or should I just make love to you again? How should I make you come this time, Edward? Hand, mouth, or cock?"

"Yes, please," Edward answered and smiled at the light smack to the ass that earned him.

"Greedy," Jasper teased, running the tip of his nose down the back of Edward's neck.

Edward rocked his hips back into Jasper and arched his neck slightly. "Mmhm. I want as much of you as I can get."

"You may have to settle for two of three," Jasper hedged.

Edward turned his head to capture Jasper's lips with his own. "I'll take whatever you want to give me, love," he murmured.

Jasper kissed him back, and managed to make them both come one more time using his hands, mouth, and cock. They fell asleep wrapped up in each other, the world outside dark and still, the two of them thinking about nothing but each other.

Edward woke (after what little sleep he'd gotten) to a dark, gloomy sky on Saturday morning, and it felt strangely appropriate. He was not looking forward to beginning a long stretch of nights separated from Jasper, but he knew there was nothing either of them could do but endure it. Even as a student when he'd dreaded leaving his family to go back to school he hadn't felt such an intense looming sense of separation anxiety, which was strange, because he would be closer to Jasper on campus than he'd been with his family while he'd been attending UW.

Jasper's face was pressed into the crook of Edward's neck; apparently he was feeling the impending return to real life as Edward was, and had clung to him through the night. Edward knew Jasper had trouble sleeping, and he was worried what would happen when they had to start sleeping in their own twin beds on opposite sides of campus beginning that night. Edward knew he needed to make sure that Jasper didn't feel like he'd been abandoned, and his mind went to work coming up with ideas that could accomplish that.

As his mental list compiled, Jasper stirred behind him, his arms tightening around Edward's waist, nose nuzzling into Edward's hair. "I really don't want to leave this bed," Jasper mumbled against Edward's neck.

"I know, baby," Edward answered. Jasper had been patient and understanding with Edward all week, and he had a feeling that Jasper had just been pushing aside his own anxieties to see Edward through making the transition to Director of Bands (since he'd gotten a new title along with Dr. Anderson's job), because he hadn't actually voiced any concern (to Edward, at least). "Me either."

Jasper's soft sigh ruffled Edward's hair. They remained in their quiet embrace for several long minutes, their breathing synchronized until Jasper stirred again, kissing Edward's neck with another tightening of his arms before he let Edward go and shifted to get out of bed.

Edward sat up beside him, their hips and shoulders touching as their legs dangled over the edge of the bed. The family was going to have brunch together, in lieu of the regular Saturday night family dinner, giving them all time to get settled into the dorms again before the students started arriving the next morning.

Esme's voice followed a soft tap on the door. "Wake up call, boys," she called quietly.

"We're up," Edward called back.

"Okay." His mom's footsteps moved back down the hall.

After a moment, Jasper kissed Edward's temple. "Guess we should get moving."

Edward nodded, feeling Jasper's reluctance. Going downstairs seemed to make it official, that their break was over and they had to face the real world again. It really shouldn't this difficult, Edward thought as he gave Jasper's thigh a squeeze and let him up. It wasn't as if they were never going to see each other again, though Edward knew the next few weeks would be extremely rough on both of them; especially with Edward being out of town for four of the five upcoming weekends.

Edward slid from the bed when he heard the toilet flush in his bathroom and he limped towards his bureau for clean clothes. He dressed in a pair of loose fitting jeans and a t-shirt while he listened to Jasper shave and then pack up his toiletries. He was seated on the bed, pulling on socks when Jasper emerged barefoot and shirtless, worn out jeans hanging from his hips. Edward watched shamelessly as Jasper bent over and tucked his toiletry bag back into his duffel. He didn't bother to hide his smile as Jasper slipped one of Edward's old band t-shirts over his head, followed by a hoodie.

Jasper donned his cowboy boot slippers and they went downstairs to join the rest of the family. As it turned out, the only others up were Bella, Carlisle and Esme, so they grabbed coffee and joined them in the kitchen as Bella and Esme began work on brunch. Alice was up and packing, Bella reported, and Esme had roused Emmett and Rose as well.

While Jasper was occupied with helping Esme with something, Edward took Bella's hand and led her outside. He tugged her down beside him on the chair Jasper'd gotten him for Christmas. "I need your help with something, love."

"Sure, Edward," she agreed easily. "Though you know you don't really have to ask. We'll all keep an eye on Jasper while you're gone."

He smiled softly and kissed her temple. Once again she'd seen more than he'd given her credit for. "Is it that obvious?"

Bella nodded and tucked a long piece of hair behind her ear. "You've both been a bit clingy the last couple days," she observed. "Can't say I blame you, really. You've lived in this great bubble for weeks and it's collapsing on you now that the real world has come calling."

"Yeah, that's how it feels." Edward sighed. "And thanks, but there's something else, too. I don't want Jasper to feel like he's been left behind with all of this. Can I leave you some things to give him? I'll have it all organized, you'll just need to leave them on his desk."

"Absolutely, Edward," Bella promised.

"Thanks, sweetheart," he said kissing her cheek lightly.

She gave him a peck in return and they headed back into the kitchen to find Emmett and Rosalie had joined them, fresh cups of coffee in hand. Alice came bouncing upstairs a few minutes later and the kitchen was full of noise as everyone talked and helped get the meal ready.

After they ate and cleaned up, the process of getting everything out began. Jasper had brought his car over from campus early in the vacation, so his stuff and some of Alice's went into his car. Edward took his things and some of Rosalie's. It took some shuffling, but they were able to get their things into their six cars without having to make a second trip or press Carlisle and his Mercedes into service.

Hugs and handshakes were exchanged before the evacuation of the Cullen home began. They would see Carlisle and Esme at the campus dinner the next evening, but there were still many thanks to go around for their hospitality over the break. His parents remained on the front step watching and waving as they all pulled out and away from the house, making an odd caravan back to the school.

Edward heaved a sigh when he stepped into his dorm room for the first time in a month and a half. He dropped his bags on the bed and cracked the window open to get fresh air circulating through the room. Once he had his iPod on the dock and music playing (recordings of the pieces he'd be conducting with the bands), he got busy getting resettled into his room. Edward visualized the scores as he listened to the recordings while he put his clothes away and remade his bed. His cowboy bear sat up against the pillows at the head of the bed.

He had about an hour before he had to meet with the rest of the faculty in his hall, so he used the time to run out to Target. He found everything he needed in order to leave small reminders for Jasper, and made it back to campus just in time. The hall meeting with the other faculty members, followed by posting notices and other beginning of term hall duties kept Edward from getting dinner with Jasper or anyone else in his family (but there'd been pizza). He texted Jasper a few times, but know that he was just as involved with getting things ready for the students' arrival on Sunday as he was.

It was well after dark when Edward was finally finished with his hall duties. His alarm clock showed 9 pm when he returned to his room, and he settled down with the music theory text book to start putting together the lessons for the first week. He worked for a couple of hours (and did a bit of online shopping) until his eyes were dry and tired. Rather than switch to his glasses and keep working, he decided to call it a night.

Edward had thought that after six weeks of living practically in Jasper's pocket that it would be a bit of relief to be back in his own space. But in the dark of night his dorm room felt cold and empty, and entirely too quiet without the soft, reassuring sounds of Jasper's breathing next to him. Even the twin sized bed seemed too big. Edward shifted restlessly, reaching back over his head to turn on the iHome system on the window ledge, then thumbed the volume down. Feeling only slightly ridiculous, he clutched at the bear Jasper had gotten him for Christmas, refusing to reach for his phone on the ledge next to the stereo, and waited impatiently for sleep to claim him.

* * *

I'll be putting some you-tube clips of the pieces the band will be playing on the blog. Special thanks to **KnittingVamp7** for her help picking out a few scores and rounding out my ideas of score prep. ^_^

Okay, so awhile back I teased y'all about a new fic. **Someday You Will Be Loved** is my next venture, and I thought I'd be able to start posting, but as it turns out, I can't work on more than one project at once. Garden has approximately 20 chapters left, so it will be awhile before that story starts getting posted.


	35. Chapter 34: New Routines

Okay, so this one's a bit shorter, because the chapter came out at over 13k words, and even I know that's too long (last chapter was probably too long and needed to be split too). So, we'll get this one in two parts.

As always, much love and thanks go to wishingforlove and Naelany for their efforts at talking me down and keeping me on track. I'm kinda at a point where I'm worried about letting y'all down; as much as it's my story, you've all shown so much love for these characters that I'm seriously freaked out about disappointing you. ^_^

Anyway - part 1 of 2. Part 2 goes up next week as scheduled.

* * *

Moving back into the dorms on Saturday had been somewhat of a bittersweet experience. While Jasper loved teaching, he wasn't looking forward to having to face several weekends without being able to see Edward after he'd had his partner all to himself for nearly six weeks. Fortunately, he'd had enough to do that he hadn't been able to dwell until the lights had gone out, and then he was left to stare at the ceiling as sleep evaded him, even given the lack of sleep he'd gotten the previous evening, having been so dedicated to providing them both with good memories to take back to campus with them.

Jasper was wide awake when his alarm went off at seven in the morning. Students would start arriving to check in around eight, so he dragged himself from the bed that had brought him little peace and took a quick shower after getting his kettle heating so he could make coffee.

"Hey, man," Emmett greeted him as they met in their adjoining space. "You get any sleep last night?"

Jasper shook his head as he rinsed out his single cup filter. "No. You?"

Emmet shrugged. "A little. But I guess I had a better idea of what to expect."

Jasper leaned one hip against the counter as Emmett pulled a bottle of water from the mini fridge. "How do you and Rose do it? Go from vacation mode to school mode?"

"The first year was really hard," Emmett admitted, "but it's gotten easier as we've figured out what to expect. I think it helped that first year too that we had summer break as our first experience, and she spent some time with her family back in New York. It gave us some time apart before we came back."

Jasper nodded. That made sense. He and Edward hadn't spent any significant time apart since the semester had ended.

"But," Emmett continued, "We always knew we'd have the weekend."

"Yeah, I think that's what's making this worse." He had tried very hard to not let Edward see how bothered he was by the idea of not getting any time alone on the weekends until nearly his birthday.

"You talk to him about it?" Emmett asked.

"No. He had enough on his plate without needing to worry about my anxieties, not that I hid them all that well," he explained. "He needed me to support his decision, which I did. I can manage the rest."

Emmett nodded, seeming to understand. "Just remember you're not all on your own, alright? You need something, just let one of us know."

Jasper nodded and smiled slightly when Emmett clapped his shoulder. "Come on, the boys are going to start pouring in any moment now."

"I'll be right there," Jasper said, nodding towards his room. He slipped into his shoes and tucked his keys into the back pocket of jeans, his Forks Academy polo shirt casual and un-tucked. He didn't bother locking his door behind him as he stepped into the hall. Emmett joined him a moment later with the stack of paperwork. The boys would all be going back into the room they had the previous semester (with a couple of exceptions), but they had to be checked back in.

It was a long day, and Jasper was reminded once again of how much trouble dealing with parents could be. There had also been one last minute room swap; apparently the parents had waited until the last minute to put the paperwork through to move their son away from the suitemate he'd clashed with the previous semester. Emmett had finally had to call his mom to make sure it had gone through when two boys showed up for the same side of a suite. In the end, everyone on their floor had gotten checked in by four, which meant Jasper had a bit of time to relax before the all campus dinner and the Dean's welcome.

He took a shower and changed into jeans and a sweater. They had Monday off, which Jasper planned to use to finish the last of his course prep, so rather than work, he made a cup of coffee and made a list of things he still needed to do, then played a few hands of computer solitaire until Emmett tapped on the adjoining door.

"Ready? We're meeting everyone there, right?" Emmett asked. He'd also changed into something closer to professional casual, nice jeans and a button up shirt that he'd left untucked.

"Yes, and I think so. I haven't heard from anyone else today." It wasn't surprising; they'd all had students to check in.

Jasper grabbed his keys and coat and met Emmett in the hall. They walked to the dining hall behind a group of students who were catching up on all their activities from the break. One young man was regaling his comrades with tales of scuba diving in Hawaii.

"You ever do anything like that on your breaks in high school?" Jasper asked Emmett.

Emmett snorted. "Right. We went to public school, so we only had two weeks off for winter break. Not that we couldn't have afforded it if we'd wanted to, but you know Carlisle and Esme; they're pretty down to earth people. Not that we didn't travel or anything, but it's not like they'd take us out of school. We did Europe a couple of summers. Dad has family in England and mom loves Italy. But even those were like ten day trips."

Jasper nodded. That sounded like everything he knew and loved about the Cullen family. They weren't flashy and they had their priorities.

He and Emmett joined the throng of students and other faculty in the cafeteria, grabbing trays and finding a line to stand in. Jasper stood in line for a pasta dish with sausage and garlic bread, and also chose a bowl of soup. He poured a glass of milk then started off in the direction of their regular table.

Carlisle and Esme were already seated together, and Bella was at Esme's right. There was an empty seat between her and Edward, which Jasper slid into. Edward's foot brushed against his calf almost before he was seated, and Jasper smiled at him, giving him a gentle kick under the table, hoping he'd behave.

"What?" Edward asked with a smirk.

Jasper rolled his eyes as Bella giggled softly. "Nothing." When Edward's foot caressed him again, Jasper twisted his foot so it locked around Edward's ankle, keeping them in contact throughout the meal.

"Where's Alice and Rose?" Emmett asked as he pulled out the chair next to his father.

"Not done yet," Bella answered. "Late arrivals," she explained. Rose and Alice were on different floors of the same building, so it was probably a group that chose to caravan together, or share transportation from the airport in Seattle.

"How long are they going to wait?" Edward asked.

Bella grinned. "About five more minutes. After that, the girls can wait on them."

They all laughed quietly. Everyone was supposed to have arrived by noon, which really got stretched until about six in the evening. It was approaching 6:30 and everyone was generally expected to Sunday dinner by seven for any announcements or addresses from the Dean.

Sure enough, about ten minutes later Rose and Alice arrived with their trays, slightly grumpy at having to have waited for the last few arrivals. Emmett ate one handed while he rubbed circles into Rose's neck, hidden by her hair, and Alice perked back up once she'd started eating.

Dinner conversation was easy and light. Edward's hand would creep onto Jasper's thigh under the table for a few minutes at a time, and Jasper casually dropped his arm around Edward's shoulder when he was finished eating and smiled when Edward leaned back in his chair slightly. He was pretty sure they weren't fooling anyone. While their relationship was somewhat of an open secret, it was mostly to avoid having to answer questions rather than any sense of shame or guilt; Emmett and Rosalie were kind of the same way.

When the PA system squawked to life, Jasper turned his chair slightly toward where the Dean was speaking, his arm falling from around Edward's shoulder. Edward took his hand under the table, stroking his fingers over Jasper's knuckles before giving his hand a squeeze.

"Good evening, and welcome back to Forks Academy," Dr. Harper began. "I've seen many familiar faces today, and a few new ones. Welcome to those students transferring in. I hope that you'll be able to get settled quickly and start forming new relationships. I hope you all had a wonderful vacation," he said enthusiastically, and cheers went up from most of the student body. "Good! That means you're back relaxed and ready to start a new semester with a fresh attitude."

There was some laughter mixed in with louder groans.

"I'll try to keep things short tonight, as I'm sure you're all tired and have unpacking to finish," he continued. "I'm sad to announce that Dr. Anderson has decided to take early retirement effective this month. Mr. Cullen will be taking over the direction of the Wind Ensemble and Symphonic bands, and Dr. Anderson's classes will be covered by other faculty in the music department. If you have questions, please contact Angela Weber and she'll get you sorted out."

Edward took a deep breath and let it out slowly, and Jasper squeezed his hand, trying to reassure him.

"Intramural signups begin tomorrow at dinner and will be held all week. Please check the bulletin boards in the residence halls for information on various clubs and activities on campus." The dean spoke for another few minutes, reminding students about the code of conduct the school expected them to follow, and cautioned them about overloading themselves with extra-curriculars during a busy semester. "It's just as important to do well in your classes as it is to prove to universities that you are a well rounded individual," he said.

"Now, please don't forget that you have resources on campus. My office is always open, and your residence hall faculty are there for you to speak to if you're having problems. It's very easy to push aside problems when things get busy, but they don't always go away.

"So with that, welcome back, and I wish you all the best for another great semester!" The dean declared. Applause carried throughout the hall and the noise level increased as chatter started again.

"Will you come back to my room with me for awhile?" Edward asked softly under the noise of the others in the room.

"Yes," Jasper answered without hesitation. Edward smiled and squeezed his hand again under the table.

The group broke up a few minutes later. Emmett and Rosalie headed back to her room, and Bella and Alice split up to back to their buildings while Jasper accompanied Edward. It wasn't raining, so they took their time walking back to Edward's building, their hands brushing against each other as they walked close together.

They split the few hours they had talking quietly, watching a movie, and making out like teenagers. Jasper, if ever asked, would have to admit to more making out than anything else. He left Edward's room just before midnight, reluctantly refusing Edward's offer to let him sleep over. Instead, he returned to his room and changed for bed, settling under the covers with a book and reading between short spells of sleep that happened when he just couldn't keep his eyes open any longer.

Despite the lack of sleep, Jasper was determined to keep to his routine, so he headed for the gym just after 5 am. He ran only two and a half miles on the treadmill, remembering Carlisle and his doctor's advice to take it easy for awhile. Edward and Emmett were working in the weight room and Jasper didn't interrupt as he set up his own circuit, focusing exercises for his back.

He did catch Edward at the door, though, and gave him a quick kiss before they split in separate directions to get on with their day.

Monday was a long day of finishing up prep work for the semester and finalizing schedules. Jasper had to meet with his department chair to discuss a few things (including the sudden responsibility for organizing the lecture for a visiting professor), meet with the swim coach about the intramural team, and finish getting his own classes ready (and get his desk cleaned off since he'd left it a mess at the break due to his back injury).He and Bella had worked quietly in the office, each lost in their own worlds of work, Jasper leaving only for his meetings and to grab them sandwiches from the cafeteria (and the brownie he snuck onto her desk).

He was a bit disappointed to get a text message from Edward just as he was leaving for dinner.

Edward wouldn't be meeting him (or the others) for dinner. Jasper understood, had half expected it, but that didn't mean he had to like it.

Jasper remained quiet through dinner, though no one said anything. Bella sat next to him and occasionally pulled him into the conversation when he drifted and someone spoke to him. He did pack up a box for Edward, though, and left it in front of his door before Jasper returned to his dorm for the evening. He changed into pajamas and one of Edward's hoodies and tucked himself into a corner of his bed with a book and his laptop prepared to repeat the previous evening of cat naps. He hoped that he'd adjust to sleeping alone again sooner rather than later.

Tuesday morning began like Monday, only the kiss Jasper exchanged with Edward before leaving the gym lingered a bit longer. Jasper had a large breakfast with the others in the dining hall, sitting as close to Edward as he could get away with.

"You look tired," Edward said quietly, his hand warm on Jasper's thigh as the voices of the others in the dining hall carried on around them.

Jasper nodded. "It's taking some getting used to sleeping alone," he admitted softly.

Edward's agreeing smile was sad. "I know, love."

Jasper covered the hand on his thigh with his own. "I'll be okay," he tried to reassure Edward. "I just need a little time to adjust and I'm napping." Edward looked just as tired, and he didn't need the extra burden of worrying about Jasper on top of his other anxieties.

"Please take care of yourself, baby," Edward whispered, turning their hands under the table and lightly stroking the back of Jasper's.

Jasper leaned in close, brushing his lips lightly over Edward's neck. "You too, okay?" he whispered. "You're not going to get a chance to catch up this weekend, since I know you don't sleep well when you travel."

"I will," Edward promised.

"Okay," Jasper agreed. "If I need to, I'll talk to your father about getting something to help me sleep."

"Thank you," Edward breathed, giving Jasper's hand another squeeze.

Jasper made it to his office about fifteen minutes before classes started. He took a minute at his desk to go over his schedule one last time before gathering what he needed and going to his classroom.

Other than his first period class, Jasper had many of the same students as he had the last semester. Jasper's first period class was the third years, which he hadn't at all fall semester, and was covering the more general US history post-Reconstruction. Their previous class had covered mostly Washington state history.

Jasper's second class was once again the fifth year students. A majority of the students were the same class (which he'd known before the semester began), so he'd planned to pick up more or less where he'd left off and continue with 'modern' world history. They'd really only covered up the origins of the Second World War, so there was plenty left for Jasper to go over within the proscribed curriculum.

At eleven, his third period class was the civil war elective he'd been looking forward to teaching. It was open to all students, and Jasper was surprised it was filled, by a wide range of classes. He'd expected mostly upperclassmen, and hadn't expected to meet his class cap of 25.

Jasper used the campus wide lunch break at noon to grab a sandwich, which he brought back to the office to eat at his desk while he checked his email and had a cup of coffee.

Like his second class, Jasper's fourth was again the 1st year students, and they were all the same. Again, he picked up where he'd left off at the end of the semester, and the students seemed to fall right into place, knowing what to expect.

His prep period came next, which gave him the chance to take a breath and start on his notes for the next days' classes.

Second year students filled his 3:00 class. With a mix of his own students and the others, they had a large review session the first day to figure out where to start. Thankfully, they were close, and after a class vote, they picked a time frame to begin where no one was reviewing too much. Jasper made a note to work on his lesson plans for that class first.

His last class, which ended at 5:15 was the fourth year students. Many familiar faces filled the room, and after a brief, ungraded quiz, he found they were all pretty much on the same page and continued them on the subject of global history leading up to the First World War and beyond if they had time.

Jasper's office hours had changed with the semester; instead of Tuesday and Thursday afternoons, he had Mondays and Wednesdays. However, the Tuesday office hour had been replaced by supervising the swim intramural, so after his last class, he made a dash for the gym, his duffel bag over his shoulder. He changed in the faculty locker room, and when the 'class' was over, he showered quickly, tugged on clean dry sweats and a hoodie (leaving his suit to dry in the locker he'd claimed as his own) and ran to meet the others (Edward) for dinner.

He made it to dinner around a quarter to seven. Everyone else was already settled into their meal when he joined them with his food, taking the seat between Bella and Edward. Jasper ate quietly, joining in the conversation when addressed, but mostly focusing on his meal and Edward. He was tired and had a long evening of work ahead knowing finally where his classes stood, and that made him pensive and slightly withdrawn.

Jasper wanted to ask Edward to come over and they could work together for a couple of hours, but he knew that they needed to spend some time apart or they'd never be able to manage the weekends Edward had to go away. So Jasper bit his tongue, smiled where appropriate over the meal and walked back to the dorms with Emmett.

A medical emergency on the floor took up several hours of Jasper's time. One of the boys, Jamie, had a severe asthma attack, and Jasper rode with him in the ambulance to the hospital to take care of any paperwork and wait to see if the boy's parents were going to come from Seattle. By the time Jamie reached his parents with Jasper's mobile phone, it was too late for them to come down and Jamie was feeling better. When he was released it was nearly midnight, and one of the nurses called a cab to take them back to campus after they visited the pharmacy to refill his inhaler. Jasper dropped Jamie off at his room, making sure he had his new inhaler and his regular meds.

When Jasper got back to his room he called the clinic and left a message for Tanya, asking her to schedule an appointment with Jamie for Dr. Cullen as a follow up. He sent an email to Esme and asked her to please put together the necessary forms that he'd need to fill out so he could collect them the next day.

By the time he settled down to finish the plans he absolutely had to have for the next day, it was two in the morning. His body ached with fatigue and he knew it was only a matter of time before his emotional state began to slip if he didn't get some real sleep soon. The short naps he was catching throughout the night were only carrying him so far. But until he got used to sleeping on his own again (or gave in and talked to Carlisle about what he should take to help which wouldn't happen until the weekend) they would have to do.

Jasper made himself a cup of coffee and settled down to work on the two classes that he absolutely had to in order to have class for the rest of the week. He finished in an hour, set his alarm for seven in his wishful thinking, left a note for Emmett so he wouldn't worry when Jasper didn't show up for the gym, and collapsed into bed.

His wishes were answered as he slept for a blissful four hours before his alarm went off. Feeling a bit more emotionally balanced for the sleep he felt more prepared for the day ahead. His smile when he saw Edward at breakfast didn't feel forced, and it just made his whole day easier.

With his office hours shifted to Wednesday, Jasper met Edward outside the dining hall, since he was coming from rehearsal with his new schedule.

"Come here," Edward said quietly, taking Jasper's hand and leading him around the corner of the building. When they were out of sight, Edward pushed Jasper gently against the building with his body weight, kissing him ferverently, a hand on Jasper's neck and the other tangling in Jasper's hair, his cane clattering to the ground.

Jasper returned the kiss with a quiet moan, his body soaking up the contact he'd been craving for i_days_/i. He wrapped his arms around Edward and crushed his body to his own, just needing to feel Edward as much as possible.

"Fuck, I miss you," Edward whispered against Jasper's lips. "Isn't it March yet?"

"I miss you too, baby," Jasper said softly with a laugh. "'Fraid not."

Edward sighed and leaned his forehead against Jasper's shoulder. Jasper left his arms around him and just hugged him close. "You don't look as tired," Edward muttered against Jasper's shirt.

"I got a little sleep last night after all the excitement," Jasper explained.

"I heard," Edward said, lifting his head and stepping slightly out of Jasper's embrace. "The boy's alright?"

"Mm," Jasper answered with a nod, taking Edward's hand. "He's fine. I think he was more scared than anything else last night."

"And you?" Edward squeezed his hand and they started walking back around to the entrance of the dining hall.

Jasper shrugged. He didn't care who was watching, he wasn't letting go of Edward's hand until he had to. "I was fine. We got the ambulance here and just tried to keep him calm."

Edward smiled and gave his hand another squeeze as they entered the building and joined a queue for their dinner. They shared a tray and both waited to get the to-order pasta. Edward got a glass of milk and Jasper had iced tea and for forty-five minutes or so, everything seemed back to their kind of normal.

After dinner, they went their separate ways again; Edward had an extra rehearsal with the Wind Ensemble and Jasper had more work to do. Jasper watched a movie when he finished going over and was satisfied with his lesson plans and homework for the rest of the week, and actually managed to sleep for a couple hours at a stretch rather than short naps.

Thursday passed uneventfully. After dinner, Jasper had his first appointment with a therapist Carlisle had recommended. It didn't quite go the way Jasper had expected, and he told himself he needed to give her a couple more sessions before he made a decision to ask for another referral. When he got back to campus, Jasper met with the history club for an hour and they began the discussion on the book they'd chosen before the break over cookies in the first floor common room of the humanities building.

Edward was waiting for Jasper when he returned home from the club meeting. "Emmett let me in," he said quietly as he stepped into Jasper's embrace once the door was closed behind him.

"Sokay," Jasper said into the top of his head. "What's up?" he asked, worry gnawing at his stomach.

"Nothing," Edward said softly. "I just wanted to see you tonight before…"

"I'm glad you did," Jasper said, though he had a feeling that wasn't the only reason Edward had stopped by. "I've missed you this week."

Edward made a quiet sound of agreement and kissed the side of Jasper's neck. Jasper nuzzled the top of his head lightly. "Are you okay?" Jasper asked softly after a minute.

"I need a good nights' sleep before I leave," Edward confessed quietly, his forehead against Jasper's shoulder.

"So you're just using me for sleep. I see how it is," Jasper teased lightly, combing his fingertips through the longer hair at the base of Edward's skull. There was no way he was going to pass up the chance to keep Edward in his arms for an evening.

Edward laughed softly. "No. I'm using you for sex. Sleep is a side effect."

Jasper echoed his laugh, thankful that they were able to tease and laugh about it. It gave Jasper hope that the next several weeks would pass more easily than he'd thought. He kissed the top of Edward's head again then nudged him gently with a shoulder bump so Edward looked up. Jasper kissed him softly, threading his fingers through Edward's hair. "Take off your shirt and lie down," Jasper urged him. "You need to unwind a little before you sleep."

Edward nodded and kissed Jasper back before stepping out his arms and limping over to the bed.

Jasper went over to the kitchenette and set the kettle to heat while he ducked into the bathroom to relieve himself (something he'd needed to do for half an hour). He washed up and prepared two mugs with tea while he waited for the water to finish heating. Jasper doctored Edward's mug with a generous squirt of honey (left over from what Esme had brought him months ago) and carried them both into the other room.

Edward had stretched out on the bed on his back, his shirt off. The heat was low since Jasper had been out all day and Edward's nipples had tightened and peaked in the chill. Jasper set the mugs on the window ledge and turned the knob on the radiator and heard it rattle as it kicked in.

"Here, baby," Jasper said, handing Edward the honeyed tea before stripping out of tops and climbing over Edward's legs to join him on the bed, sliding in behind Edward when he sat up. He pulled Edward back slightly so his back was just inches from Jasper's chest. With long slow strokes he ran his hands over Edward's back. He wasn't trying to massage, just trying to give Edward some tactile comfort and help him relax. Jasper hummed quietly, random snatches of songs and Edward occasionally added a harmony, making Jasper smile.

Jasper felt Edward's sigh against his hands and was able to see him visibly relax by degrees as he slowly slumped forward. "Still awake?" Jasper asked quietly.

"Hm," was Edward slightly less than coherent response.

Jasper laughed softly and reached around to pry Edward's mug from his hands. He set both empty mugs on the ledge and eased himself back into the bed, tugging Edward down with him. Edward unconsciously snuggled himself into his regular place at Jasper's side, his hand going over Jasper's heart.

Jasper smiled fondly and kissed Edward's forehead as he gently adjusted so they fit into the bed more comfortably. He spent the night dozing with Edward sleeping soundly in his arms, spending his awake times watching Edward, and for once, he didn't mind the lack of sleep.

Jasper walked Edward back to his room on his way to the gym Friday morning. Edward had only an hour before the charter bus arrived to carry him and the Wind Ensemble the roughly ten hour drive to Pullman. They shared a long, sweet kiss before Jasper reluctantly left to start his day.

Bella sat close at breakfast, and Jasper appreciated her presence on the walk to their building for classes. She took his elbow as they walked, which warmed his side and fulfilled a need for contact in both of them.

There were several students missing from his 2nd and 3rd period classes, and when Jasper got back to his desk at lunch time, he checked the names against the email that Angela had sent out to all the faculty, asking that the students be excused for the trip. He went ahead and checked his rosters for his afternoon classes and marked students excused from his last class while he ate his turkey sandwich and had another cup of coffee. He'd left his phone in his room, and he wished he hadn't, so that he could send Edward a text.

Jasper returned to his office for his prep period and frowned when he saw something on his desk that he hadn't left there. His frown turned into a soft smile as he picked up the small token, running his finger over the raised emblem of the Golden Gate Bridge on the keychain. Memories of their trip surfaced and he grinned, reaching for the note that had been tucked under the keychain.

_Thinking about you. Love you. Miss you._ Jasper read Edward's handwriting. His smile softened and he tucked both the note and the keychain into his pocket. He didn't really notice that he'd stick his hand in his pocket throughout the rest of the day and smile when his fingers brushed across the keychain.

He walked to dinner with Bella, much like they'd walked to their office that morning, with her hand around Jasper's elbow, tucked up against his body.

"Thanks, darlin'," he said quietly as they walked.

"What for?" she asked innocently.

"Oh, don't give me that," he said with a grin and a nudge. "Thanks for delivering the package from Edward."

"It was worth it to see you smile," she said, giving his arm a squeeze.

Jasper kissed the top of her head and they met up with the others for dinner. He managed to convince Alice he didn't feel like going out with the others, and was able to go back to his room. He found a box of thumbtacks and pushed one into the wall, hanging the keychain from it, just under one of the prints Edward had gotten him for Christmas.

Despite the longer stretches of sleep Jasper had managed on Wednesday and Thursday night, he was exhausted. He set up a movie in his laptop before he changed into sweats and a long sleeved t-shirt and tugged his cowboy boot slippers onto his feet. Jasper grabbed his phone from where he'd left it on the table and checked for messages when he found one from Edward. He returned the message and checked his email before starting the film.

Carlisle had sent him an email regarding the patient gatherings in the pediatric ward, finding a schedule attached. There was one on Sunday, and Jasper made a note to go.

He started his movie, his phone within reach on the ledge behind him. Jasper had no idea how much of the movie he watched before he dozed off.

A knock at the door woke Jasper. Disoriented, he moved his computer off the bed, the movie's main menu playing. He had no idea how long he'd been asleep, but it was just enough that he didn't feel rested, and his eyes felt like sandpaper. Though he hadn't expected to get any sleep with Edward gone, it appeared his body had proven to have other ideas. So, he somewhat grumpily turned on the light over his bed and hauled himself upright and flung the door open, ready to bark at whoever had woken him up, but the harsh words died in his throat when he saw who it was.

"Bella?" The question was unnecessary - it was clearly Bella, soaking wet, trembling, and looking scared to death standing at his door. Her handbag was hanging from her shoulder and her makeup was running tracks over her cheeks from the rain and tears. She was clutching her thigh length leather coat closed, and her knee length skirt was wind and rain swept.

* * *

please don't kill me for the cliffhanger! I didn't do it to be mean, honest. ^_^

I also know I've been fail about updating the blog with stuff. I'll try to get back to that soon.


	36. Chapter 35: A Change in the World

An early update to resolve the cliffhanger, which means there won't be a post next week, since I'm sure everyone (including myself) is going to be heading into last minute holiday craziness. I hope everyone has a great holiday (or is having a good holiday), and that you get to spend it with those you love in peace and happiness.

Thanks as always to Naelany and wishingforlove. Ladies, you rock.

Inspiration for the title of this chapter comes from the Finger Eleven song _Change the World_. I've embedded a video on the blog.

* * *

"Bella?" The question was unnecessary - it was clearly Bella, soaking wet, trembling, and looking scared to death standing at his door. Her handbag was hanging from her shoulder and her makeup was running tracks over her cheeks from the rain and tears. She was clutching her thigh length leather coat closed, and her knee length skirt was wind and rain swept.

"S-sorry it's l-late," she stammered as he ushered her inside.

"No worries, darlin'. Come in, let's get you warmed up." He pulled two clean towels from the top of the wardrobe, and ushered her toward the bathroom. "I'll leave clothes outside the door and make some tea," he said gently. "Just leave your wet things."

Bella nodded and shut and locked the door behind her. Jasper waited until he heard the shower kick on before he returned to his room. All his clothes would be too big, but he lacked options. He located a clean pair of sweats and a thermal top, along with a pair of heavy socks. He left everything folded in a pile outside the bathroom door. He filled the kettle and set it on the base to heat before returning to his room, pacing with the adjoining door open.

He listened to the shower shut off and heard the door open and close. Bella emerged again a couple minutes later, swimming in his clothes, but no longer shaking from cold. Her wet hair had been piled on her head in a messy bun, and she must've already had the fastener on her somewhere, unless Rose had left one in Emmett's things.

He handed her a cup of tea and guided her back into his room, leaving the adjoining door open a crack. Bella crawled onto the bed, pressing her back against the wall, drawing her knees up to her chest as she cradled the warm mug between her palms.

"What happened, Bells?" Jasper asked gently as he sat next to her, their shoulders bumping.

She blushed, ducking her head. "I got spooked."

"What happened?" he asked again.

"James," she finally whispered.

Jasper draped his arm over her shoulders and pulled her against him in a hug as she started trembling again. "Tell me what happened, sweetheart," he urged quietly.

Bella took a long drink from her tea and a deep breath which she let out through her nose before she spoke. "Me and Alice, Em and Rose went out after dinner," she explained quietly, leaning her head against his shoulder. "Alice dressed me up and did my makeup. I let her talk me into a skirt," she said with a rueful smile. "Anyway, went to a bar and had a couple of drinks, and then we went out dancing," she said. "I danced with a couple of guys." She blushed as she said it, and Jasper couldn't help but smile softly. "But something felt weird. I told Alice and she didn't see anything strange, and neither did Emmett or Rose, so we just kept having a good time. Alice got me the numbers of a couple of guys I danced with before we left. I just had this odd sense that someone was watching me," she said.

Jasper didn't know why, but the thought of Bella getting some other guys' numbers bothered him.

"Alice and I split a cab back to campus since we rode with Em and Rose and they were headed elsewhere for the night," she said with a slight smile. "We split up on the path and I walked back to my building," she said. "It'd started raining while we were in the club, and I was watching where I was going so I wouldn't slip and fall into a puddle; I left my phone in my room," she whispered. "I was digging my key out of my purse when I saw something out of the corner of my eye. When I looked up I couldn't see anything. It happened two more times until I finally saw someone lurking in the shadows of the bushes under one of the windows about halfway down the building; my windows." She shuddered and clutched at her mug.

Jasper tightened his arm around her. "Did he hurt you?" he asked seriously.

She shook her head. "No. But I could feel him watching me. I didn't want to go into the building for the emergency phone with him lurking outside and chance of him slipping in behind me or a student, so I ran over here, after stopping at a couple of other buildings to make sure he wasn't following me. The dean had my card set for emergency access to all buildings after hours when I filed for the restraining order after Halloween," she explained before Jasper could ask how she'd been able to get in when the after-hours codes had been set. "I didn't know where else to go. I didn't have my car keys so I couldn't leave campus and-"

"Sh," Jasper soothed her. "It's fine. You absolutely should have come here. You did good," he assured her, hugging her tight. "Tomorrow, we're going to call the police and report him, and then we'll see if we can get your room changed. The other side of Alice's suite is still empty, right?"

"Okay," she whispered. "Yes, but I don't want to invade her space. Can we wait and see what the police do before we talk to anyone about moving?"

"Alright, darlin'," he agreed. "But you're not going home tonight," he said firmly.

"I'm not going to fight you on that one," she said with a shudder.

"Good." He kissed the top of her head. "Do you want more tea?" he asked.

She shook her head. "Thanks."

Jasper took her empty cup and rose. "Pick out a movie and get comfortable, okay?"

She smiled at him gratefully and nodded. "Thanks, Jas."

He returned the smile and walked into the kitchenette. He placed the empty mugs into the sink, filling them with a bit of water so they wouldn't stain. After making sure the kettle was off he turned out the lights and returned to his room, leaving the adjoining door unlocked. He double checked that his door to the hall was locked before he tugged the folded afghan (that Bella had brought him when he'd been ill and he'd never returned) from on top of the wardrobe and spread it on the floor, snagging a sweatshirt from the back of his chair that he folded into a pillow. It wouldn't be the most comfortable bed he'd never slept in, but neither would it be the worst.

"What the hell are you doing?" Bella asked, the softness of her voice a contrast to the words.

"Making up someplace to sleep?" The words transformed into a sentence without Jasper's consent.

"You're not sleeping down there."

"Neither are you, darlin', and that bed's not really big enough for two of us," Jasper responded.

"Jasper Whitlock, are you saying I'm fat?" Bella asked.

"Fuck no," he answered quickly.

Bella giggled. "Get up here, please?" she asked quietly. "We're adults and we can share. I know you're missing Edward and I could just really use someone to hold me tonight. Okay?"

"Promise you won't bite?" he asked, teasing as he climbed to his feet.

She giggled again and held up three fingers at shoulder level. "Promise."

Jasper dragged the table a bit closer to the bed so he could set up the laptop with the movie. He settled on the bed, turned onto one side, his back to the wall as Bella snuggled up in front of him, her back to his front, Jasper's arms wrapped around her middle. With his duvet pulled over them it was warm and comfortable, and it wasn't long before Jasper dozed off again, his forehead pressed lightly to the top of Bella's head, his soft breath ruffling her hair.

The body next to and half on top of Jasper was warm, soft, and snuggly. As he'd slept, he'd turned onto his back, his preferred position for sleeping. Somewhere in the back of his mind, something niggled, but barely half awake after the only real sleep he'd gotten in a week, Jasper ignored it. His arms tightened around his bed companion who squirmed and sighed softly, burrowing closer. He felt soft lips brush against his collarbone where his t-shirt had shifted in his sleep. Jasper's hands drifted under his partner's shirt, caressing the soft skin. He heard a giggle and he shifted, nudging his companion into a better position as he shifted onto his side, not so surreptitiously rubbing his morning erection against soft flesh. His partner moaned softly and arched into him. Without opening his eyes Jasper let his hands wander. He skimmed soft flesh, finding soft curves where he expected hard planes, and his eyes flew open when he encountered not hardened pecs, but soft fleshy breasts whose nipples had pebbled under his thumbs.

"Mm. Jasper?" Bella's morning voice was low and warm like honey, an edge of sleepy confusion and desire laced through it. "Feels good," she murmured.

Part of him screamed to keep going, that she'd acknowledged and accepted and she was so warm and felt good against him. But it was Bella, who talked in her sleep, his best friend and Edward might forgive him, but he'd never forgive himself.

"Jasper, don't stop," Bella mumbled. His hands had stilled on her breasts and he moved them away, letting them rest instead on her flat stomach. He couldn't quit bear to let her go just yet, though something inside was screaming that it was wrong. Bella sighed again and snuggled deeper into his embrace and he bit back a moan as his body responded.

He and Edward's conversation before New Year's came rushing back, flooding Jasper with the emotions he'd felt that as he walked in the rain, guilt, confusion, and anxiety pouring over him like that cold rain had. He felt suddenly sick as he thought about how close he'd come to doing the one thing he'd asked Edward not to. He needed out of the bed.

Bella squirmed and clung to him whimpering softly when he tried to rise. "Shh, darlin'," he consoled her softly. "Just goin' to the bathroom," he said as calmly as he could.

She let go finally and he quietly shut the adjoining door behind him. Once in the bathroom, the cold tile shocked him and once he'd used the toilet and splashed cold water on his face he felt a bit more calm and centered physically, though his thoughts were still racing.

He stared at himself for a minute in the mirror. His eyes were bright but red-rimmed, stubble covering his jaw and chin, his hair blonde hair wild but dull in color, nearly chin length. He looked as he felt; a mess. He dropped his gaze to the porcelain bowl of the sink, trying to breathe deeply through his nose to calm the nausea he felt rising. Not at the fact that he'd been feeling up a woman, but because that woman was his best friend who'd trusted him to protect her, not take advantage of her. He swallowed harshly, trying to tell himself that it was simply a matter of comfort, that his body had responded to the warmth and pressure of her body against his, that he hadn't assaulted her, that she hadn't minded and liked it. She had asked him to continue.

He had stopped when he'd realized what he was doing. He hadn't done anything wrong.

It took a long few minutes before Jasper's conscience finally allowed him to process and believe that. He splashed more water on his face and ran his damp hands through his hair, pushing the long strands back out of his face. When he left the bathroom he turned the kettle on to get the water heating while he washed out their mugs from the night before.

Jasper peeked back into his bedroom. Bella had curled up in a tight ball near the middle of his bed, Jasper's pillow clutched in her arms. She looked peaceful, but also vulnerable in the clothes that were too big. Her hair had fallen out of the bun during the night and her long hair spilled over her body like another blanket. As he watched her sleep for a minute he wondered if that was how she normally rested, or if like himself, it was a protective position.

When the water was done, Jasper made a cup of coffee and went back to the bed. He coaxed Bella out of her curl once he'd settled back against the head of the bed, and she easily relaxed with a relieved sigh when she cuddled into the pillow Jasper placed against his hip for her. He cradled his coffee in his right hand and played with long strands of her hair with his left as he thought about everything Edward had said before New Year's.

It was the second time he'd woken up with Bella in his arms, and it had felt much like the first. It felt right, somehow. But it also felt wrong, because she wasn't Edward. Christ, he was confused. How could something feel right and wrong at the same time?

Jasper drank his coffee as his thoughts continued to chase each other around his head until Bella stirred awake against him. He put his cup aside as she stretched and turned her face up to him against the pillow, her brown eyes heavy lidded but clear, a small smile in place.

"Morning," she said quietly.

"Mornin' darlin'," he greeted her. "Sleep okay?"

"Mm, yes," she said with another stretch of her legs, her pointed toes brushing against his calves. "Did you?"

"Pretty well," Jasper admitted.

"Good. You looked like you needed it." The more she spoke, the more the smoky sexy tone of her voice faded. She yawned and sat up a bit. "Can I ask you something?" she asked after she stretched again, smoothing her hair between her fingers before twisting it up into a knot and letting it fall again, washing Jasper in the scent of his own shampoo.

"Sure," he said, tugging lightly on the end of her hair playfully.

She stuck her tongue out at him. "Did something happen this morning?" she asked.

"Uh," Jasper stammered, dropping the tendril he'd been running through his fingers. "Yeah. I was a little confused when I woke up earlier."

Bella raised an eyebrow at him, but she was biting her lip. "How confused?"

"Confused enough to be really fucking embarrassed, sweetheart, and owe you an apology," Jasper said quietly.

Bella smiled softly. "No apology necessary, Jas."

"You were awake?" he asked, feeling his heart begin to race.

She shook her head. "No, not really. I just had a weird dream that felt a bit too real."

Jasper let his breath out slowly. "I should still apologize," he said. "You trusted me and-"

"Jasper, it's okay," she assured him. Her smile was still in place, but there was something in her eyes that Jasper couldn't read. "Honestly. I'm not upset." She shifted and kissed his cheek. "Okay?"

He nodded slowly. "Okay," he answered softly. Jasper wasn't sure it was a great idea to just let it drop, but Bella seemed to want to, so he followed suit.

"Okay," she repeated. "What time is it?" she asked, twisting to face the clock on the ledge.

"Just after nine," he reported.

"Meh," she answered sullenly. "Alright," she sighed. "I'm up."

Jasper laughed softly and kissed the crown of her head. "Ready to make that phone call?"

She groaned and shook her head. "I need a few minutes to make myself human again first," she said lightly, untangling herself from the covers and getting to her feet. "Is there more tea?"

"In the cupboard." Jasper nodded toward the kitchenette.

"Okay." She shuffled off toward the adjoining door and Jasper brought his knees to his chest, wrapping his arms around his legs and resting his chin on his knees. His phone beeped behind him and he fumbled for it, not raising his head. It felt heavy and he felt unsure, and it was wiping out all the relief he'd felt at getting full night's sleep.

He smiled when he saw the message from Edward. He returned the morning greeting with an "ILU." Edward sent back that he was on his way to breakfast and he'd call later. Jasper tucked the phone away just as Bella came back, her hair secured with what looked to be chopsticks, a mug between her palms. She'd tucked in the oversized shirt and rolled the waistband of his sweats to make them fit, but they still hung low on her hips and pooled around her ankles over the top of the thick socks she was wearing.

"Do you mind? I can't find my hair tie," she explained with a wave toward her head.

Jasper shook his head with a grin. "Nope. I'll just put them back in Emmett's things."

Bella laughed quietly and sat at the foot of the bed with her feet tucked up underneath her. "So what's the plan?"

"You're going to use my phone to call in a report about James," Jasper explained. "Then, if you don't mind going like that, we'll go grab breakfast, and if the police say it's safe to do so, I will walk you home so you can get on with your day."

Bella made a face around her mug and Jasper laughed. "Which I gather is you shopping with Alice this afternoon?"

She nodded. "Yeah." Bella sighed and shrugged. "It's not all that bad, just a few stops before dinner at Esme and Carlisle's, and I can work tomorrow," she said. "I just kind of wanted to get some work done today."

"You'll still have a bit of time this morning, unless you're on the phone for awhile."

"Yeah." She took another sip from her mug. "Alright, let's get this over with. Give me the phone," she said, holding out her hand.

Jasper handed it to her with a grin. "I can give you privacy, or I can stay," he offered.

"Stay, please," she asked shyly.

Jasper smiled and nodded and uncurled himself. He stretched his legs out across the bed so his toes brushed her thighs where she sat.

Bella offered him a grateful smile as she dialed.

He listened to Bella's half of the conversation without soaking up too many of the details, since they'd talked it through the previous night. He just let her know he was there while she spoke to the officer. The conversation lasted about twenty minutes.

"They picked James up for drunk driving last night," she explained with a sigh, handing Jasper back his phone. "They've got him in custody and he won't be released until later this afternoon. They've made a note of the violation of the protective order and will forward it to the D.A." She slumped forward slightly. "I'm not supposed to go anywhere on my own for a few days, and I should change dorms if possible." She sounded angry and sad at the same time.

Jasper nudged her lightly with his foot and held one arm out in invitation. "You going to be okay?" he asked softly as she crawled across the bed to join him.

"I don't know," she said after a beat. "I thought I was done dealing with all this stuff," she explained. "Just as everything's starting to feel normal again, when I feel like I can stop looking over my shoulder to see if he's watching he does something else to put me right back where I was. He's fucking with my life, and I hate him for it," she said vehemently.

Jasper was taken slightly aback. He wasn't sure he'd ever heard her swear before. "You've got every right to be pissed at him, Bella. But you can't let him have this kind of power over you. That's all he's doing, exerting what little power he has left to frighten you and keep you running. Now," he said, "That doesn't mean we're going to be stupid about this. You're going to change dorms. We will keep you safe."

She nodded.

"James does this so he can control you in the only way he has left," Jasper explained quietly. "He can't tell you how to dress or who to hang out with or what to eat anymore. All he can do is try to intimidate you. He's a scared weak little man who needs to abuse and control people to feel better about himself, and you're not his pawn anymore, right?"

"Right," Bella answered. "But if he's violating the protective order…"

"If you see him, call the police," Jasper said. "Call one of us, though we're likely to be right there with you if he's not in jail," he explained. "He can only violate the order so many times before the cops throw him in jail just because they're tired of responding to your calls."

Bella smiled a bit. "Okay."

"Okay," Jasper said with a nod, giving her a squeeze. "We'll talk to Esme tonight about what we need to do to switch your rooms. I know it's a pain in the ass darlin', but it's the best way to keep you safe."

She nodded, looking down into her empty mug. "I hate being such a bother," she muttered.

"It's no bother keeping you safe, Bells," Jasper answered. "None of this is your fault."

"But if I hadn't-"

"Not. Your. Fault." Jasper emphasized each word.

Bella sighed and nodded and Jasper knew she didn't believe him. She probably wouldn't until James went away for a long time.

He gave her another hug. "Alright then, since we're on the buddy system, and I'm ready for food, how does a trip to the cafeteria sound?"

Bella gave him a half smile and nodded. "Sounds good."

Where Bella looked cute in his sweats and thermal, Jasper looked like a slob in his. "Just give me a minute to put on real pants," he said, pulling a pair from the bureau and stepping into the kitchenette to change quickly. When he emerged, Bella was looking at her dress shoes with a small little frown. There was no way she'd be able to wear them over her socks.

"Forget swimming, sweetheart, you're going to drown in my shoes," Jasper quipped, but he drug out his trainers for her, while he slipped into his loafers. They crammed her clothes from the night before into a small duffel bag that Jasper carried as they headed out for breakfast.

They shuffled to the dining hall, trying their best to avoid puddles. Bella couldn't lift her feet; each time she did she stepped right out of Jasper's shoes, causing her to stumble and Jasper to laugh as he tried to catch her. They were both laughing when they reached the cafeteria and took a moment to calm down before they got trays and meals and found a quiet corner against a window.

He walked Bella home after breakfast, on the lookout for James (even though he was supposed to be in custody) or anything else suspicious.

When they reached her dorm, Bella slipped out of Jasper's shoes and tiptoed up to kiss him goodbye. It wasn't a friendly kiss on the cheek or a peck on the mouth, but a lingering press of lips that wasn't heated, but wasn't completely chaste, either.

"Bella, I-" he started. The feeling he'd had when she'd dropped their earlier conversation came back. There was something else, but he couldn't place it. Did she remember more than she'd let on?

"Sh," she shushed him, a finger over his lips. "It's okay," she said with a sad smile, a flash of longing in her wide brown eyes. "I just wish things could be a bit different, y'know?" she whispered. She drew her hand back. "I'll see you at dinner," she said quickly, letting herself into her room, but not before he saw the threat of tears in her eyes. She closed the door before he could say anything else.

After a moment of staring at her closed door, Jasper bent to pick up his shoes and headed back to his room.

Jasper didn't actually see her for dinner – he never made it to the Cullens'. He did at least phone Esme and let her know he wasn't feeling up to it. She seemed understanding, promising to send a plate of leftovers with Emmett.

He spent the day in his room, trying to distract himself with grading homework, but thoughts of how Bella had felt under him, how her lips had felt in on his, his conversation with Edward kept invading and distracting him from his distraction. He threw his pen across the room in frustration and opened a blank word doc and started to type.

_I don't know what the hell is wrong with me. How can I possibly be beginning to question myself now, at this point in my life? I thought I had everything figured out. If I had wanted to be with a woman, why couldn't I have been with Maria and saved my career? Why Bella? Why now? Would I even be considering this if Edward hadn't brought it up? I don't know what to do and I'm so fucking confused. I mean – Edward's gone and will be for weeks, and I could really use him here right now to help me sort this all out. The look in Bella's eyes this morning has been haunting me all day – could she want me that way, even knowing I'm with Edward? Even knowing that that I'm gay? But I think it's haunting me even more because for a moment this morning I actually considered listening to that tiny voice in my head that told me it was okay, that Edward wouldn't mind (would encourage it, actually). But it feels _wrong_ in some way. She reminds me so much of Amber, which I think is part of the problem. But fuck…this morning…I don't know if it's just because I've gone a week without Edward and I was starved for some human contact or what…it felt good. Right. Like Edward feels right in my arms, it just felt like one of the most natural things in the world. Being with Bella has been like that before, and we've always been affectionate with each other, since James. But do I want her? Do I want to sleep with her? Certain parts of my anatomy definitely thought so this morning. And what does that mean for my relationship with Edward? I already love them both, but Edward possesses so much of my life and heart – is there room for Bella in there too? Jesus Christ I can't believe I'm actually considering this…I don't know what it is I'm considering, really. Me and Bella? Me and Bella and Edward? Fuck, I don't even know what she wants, or what Edward wants (Edward wants us both). I just…I can't…this is making my brain hurt. Yesterday I was a gay man missing his lover. Today I'm a confused mess still missing his lover who has hurt his best friend by inadvertently rejecting her. That's what happened, isn't it? I mean, I didn't kiss her back, and there was rejection written all over her features. But surely she didn't expect…I mean, me and Edward. But Bella…fuck, this isn't helping. I wish Edward were here. I wish I could just talk to him, just curl up with him and let him help me figure out what this is going on in my head. I wish he'd be here with me so we could talk to Bella together. I want him to tell me this is going to be alright and that I'm not going crazy. But something he said keeps popping up in my mind. He said "If in six months Bella comes to either one of us…" Well, she came to me. I wonder why not Edward (he's not here). I mean – he's wanted to be with her before, so…would she even want us both? Could I do that to Edward? Either way? Jesus, Whitlock there you go jumping the gun again. You don't even know what she wants, or how she feels. Fuck. I'm just going in circles and nothing's making any sense. I don't even know what the fuck _I_ want. Okay, not true. I want Edward. I want a decent night's sleep. I want to not ruin my friendship with Bella or my relationship with the rest of Edward's family. I just don't know what to do, and I hate being helpless. I just…she's Bella. She's my best friend besides Edward and I love her. I can't lose her. And I don't know what to do._

When he was finished he sat back with a sigh, rubbing his eyes. He opened his email and composed a quick note to Bella.

_Bella sweetheart, I'm sorry about this morning. Both what happened in my room, and when I walked you home. It wasn't very gentlemanly of me to be so inconsiderate with your feelings. You just kind of caught me off guard. I didn't miss dinner tonight because of you – I'm just not ready to go back to the Cullens'; I hope you can understand. I'd have called, but I had a feeling you might not have spoken to me. ;-) I'll see you tomorrow at dinner, okay? I do love you, sweetheart, I just need to get some things figured out in my head. Call me if you need to. _

He hit send before he could second guess himself or the words. Jasper closed the lid on his laptop and changed into a pair of shorts (after rummaging through his drawer for a clean jock) and a t-shirt and tugged on his trainers. With is iPod and keys in hand, he set off for the gym.

Jasper ran himself stupid, as his mama would've said. He lost himself in the rhythm of his feet on the belt and the beat pounding in his ears. He would've run outside, but it was raining and he'd been sick enough for awhile. Sweat soaked his shirt and ran down his face, and Jasper ran until his legs felt like jello and his chest burned with exertion. He had to hold on to the railing when he stepped off the treadmill to keep his balance. His cool down stretches left him shaking and he hoped he'd exhausted himself enough to get some more sleep; the only decent sleep he'd had all week had been when Bella'd been in his bed. Even when Edward had stayed over Thursday night, Jasper had spent stretches of time just watching his lover sleep. With Bella, sleep had come easily and he'd slept soundly.

He quickly banished that thought and wished that he'd brought a hoodie with him as his warm sweaty body hit the frigid drizzle outside the gym. Jasper dredged up the energy to jog back to his building in order to get warm more quickly.

As soon as he hit his door he began stripping out of clothes, leaving them in a trail to his closet where he grabbed the towels hanging from the corners. He wrapped one around his waist after he stepped out of his shorts, leaving everything in a pile by the door. Jasper brushed past Emmett, who was heating something in the microwave and slipped into the bathroom. He didn't bother with the light (the small night-light providing enough light for him to avoid running into anything) as he turned on the taps and was rewarded almost instantly with hot water. The step into the tub strained his tired quads, and his legs shook as he stood under the water. He braced himself against the wall, body exhausted as the hot water rinsed the sweat and grime from his skin and began to warm him.

"Jas, man, you alright?" Emmett called into the room after tapping on, then opening the door.

"Yeah," Jasper called back. "I'll be out in a minute."

"No worries," Emmett said. "You just looked a little wild."

"I ran for a bit too long," he said, shaking himself out of his exhausted stupor and reaching for the shampoo. "I'm gonna clean up and crash."

"Alright. Mom sent leftovers for you; they're in the fridge. Get some sleep."

"Thanks, Em." Jasper heard the door close before he stuck his head under the spray to rinse the suds out. He finished washing quickly and stumbled back into his room with a towel wrapped around his waist. His eyes felt heavy as he awkwardly tugged on a pair of pajamas pants before falling onto the bed. Jasper's exhausted body overruled his mind and sleep dragged him under quickly.

Sleep faded just as quickly, as Jasper woke only a few hours later. His body ached from the run and his head and heart hurt from all the unanswered questions. He stumbled into the kitchenette for a bottle of water which he drained quickly, then refilled from the tap and drank more slowly. Back in his room he glanced at the clock and saw it was just after 1 am. Jasper sighed and ran his left hand through his hair, tugging on the ends in frustration (realizing that he'd stolen the gesture from Edward). Doubting he'd get back to sleep, he paced back into the kitchenette and retrieved the plate of leftovers from Esme.

He reheated the bowl of stroganoff over noodles and carried it with him back to the table in his room. Jasper sat heavily, flipping his laptop open with another sigh as he poked at his dinner with a fork and waited for his computer to wake back up.

Bella hadn't responded to his earlier email, not that he expected her to, and a new level of anxiety curled into his stomach. He hadn't meant his words in the hall outside her room (all two of them) as a brush off; she'd just taken him by surprise. She'd kissed him.

She'd kissed him at New Year's too, but he'd attributed that to the alcohol at the time. She'd been sober that morning; the scare of running into James had sobered her up before she'd stepped into Jasper's shower to get warm (if she'd even been that intoxicated to begin with).

He thought about their relationship as he ate. They'd been close almost from the start, just as Jasper had been with Edward. From the first time he met her, Bella had reminded him of Amber, not just in her physical appearance (and then only in build), but in her quiet selflessness with others and her keen intuition for pleasing the others around her. Bella always just seemed to know what someone needed to feel better and quietly made it happen. She made him feel better with a touch, much like Edward could, and she understood him in ways no one else in the family could, not being able to share in his grief over losing his family.

Jasper really just couldn't fathom losing her friendship over the misunderstanding of that morning. He hadn't disliked the kiss, but she'd startled him and he didn't really have the chance to respond before she'd pulled away and hushed him.

Christ, he wanted Edward to come home so he had someone to talk to about everything. His dinner sat on top of the ball of anxiety that had settled in his stomach and he stopped eating. His body hummed with restless energy and he was tempted to go for swim, but he knew that wasn't safe with the condition he was already in from the run with no one around in the middle of the night to help him if he ran into trouble.

He shut down his computer and grabbed his iPod from the dock. With a bit more force than necessary he plugged in his earbuds as he stretched out on his bed. Jasper turned the volume up louder than was strictly needed, but the music helped to drown out his thoughts. He concentrated on flexing and relaxing each muscle, trying to ease the tension and find some kind of relaxation. It took some time, but finally he didn't feel the need to run laps around the school grounds and drifted back into a restless sleep.

Despite waking up feeling like he'd been run over by a truck, Jasper forced himself into the shower and then to breakfast on Sunday morning.

Jasper arrived at the hospital in his worn jeans and a long sleeved t-shirt under the hoodie he'd stolen from Edward (and worn so much in the last week it didn't carry much of Edward's scent anymore), carrying his beat up guitar case. He decided he should probably look into getting a new bag, if he was going to be actually using it more often; the case was beginning to look less and less structurally sound.

He made his way up to the pediatric floor and found the common room where they'd gathered for the Christmas celebration less than a month earlier. Despite being exhausted, Jasper had a feeling spending a couple of hours with the kids was exactly what he needed. Edward would be home in a few hours (four hours and fifteen minutes, not that Jasper was counting), and he just needed something to brighten his spirits.

"Hi! Jasper, right?" A young woman dressed as a candy striper greeted him at the door to the playroom. "Dr. Cullen said we could probably expect you today. I'm Jenny," she introduced herself.

"Hi, Jenny. Yes, I'm Jasper," he acknowledged.

She flashed him a bright smile. "This is your first time, right?" At his nod, she continued. "Well, there's nothing really formal. Generally we have someone who comes in and reads stories or plays music and the kids get to just relax and play. There's some kind of treat, usually, since we try to celebrate any birthdays for the month."

Jasper nodded. "I brought my guitar."

"Great!" she enthused. "How are you with kids' songs?"

Jasper grinned. "I've been brushing up."

"Good! I'll introduce you."

He followed her into the room, and he recognized a few of the kids from Christmas. He felt momentarily sad, realizing they'd probably been in the hospital for weeks.

"Hi, kids!" Jenny called out, clapping her hands. "I've got a treat for you today. Jasper's here to play for you!"

The kids cheered and Jasper caught a few smiles from parents he also recognized has having been around at Christmas. As he settled down, pulling out his guitar, a few of the kids crept closer, gathering around him on the floor. Jasper joined them and began to play.

He ran through a few favorites he remembered from his childhood. He started with Old MacDonald, letting the kids yell out animals, and then moved on to the Wheels on the Bus, which got them up and acting out the movements. Before he got them sat back down, he strummed along as they sang I'm a Little Teapot. After Nobody Likes Me (guess I'll go eat worms), he played There Was an Old Lady Who Swallowed a Fly, and finished up the set with a rousing version of Hokey Pokey. The whole thing lasted about an hour, and after the group dance (some of the kids had dragged their parents in to the Hokey Pokey), the group quieted down a little, finding toys to play with.

Jasper placed his guitar back in the case, feeling more relaxed, but slightly sadder as he watched the kids play. While he was more than happy to be there and give the kids some small happiness, he kind of wished he wasn't alone while he was doing it. He rose and walked a bit, stretching out his back and legs that were still protesting the previous evening's run.

"You look sad," a small voice drifted up.

Jasper looked down at his old friend Shelly and dredged up a smile for her. He eased himself to the floor and sat cross-legged, patting the floor beside him. She sat carefully, then wiggled herself closer to his side.

"Why are you sad?" she asked.

"Do you remember my friend Edward?" Jasper asked.

"He was the one with the pretty hair?" she asked, her face scrunched up as she tried to remember. "He played cars with Teddy."

"Yes, that's him," Jasper said with a small laugh. "Well, he's gone on a trip and I miss him." It was the best simple explanation he could come up with.

"Is he your best friend? Like Lisa is my best friend?"

Jasper nodded. "He's my very best friend."

Shelly nodded sagely, and Jasper fought back the amused laugh that threatened to bubble up as she looked so serious.

"Mommy helps me write letters to Lisa and my other friends when they have to go away. Maybe you should write him a letter," she suggested. "I like to get letters. Sometimes, I get letters back when my friends go on trips and they send me stickers and candies and things," she said, her smile returning.

"Maybe I will," Jasper said with a nod. He hadn't wanted to bother Edward when he knew he was already going to be a mess over the concert. Other than a quick text to wish him luck and reminded Edward that he loved him, Jasper hadn't initiated any contact with Edward since he'd left with the band Friday morning. He'd been too afraid that if he'd had, especially after the previous day, everything would have come bursting out of him where Edward wouldn't be able to do a thing about it. "Thanks, Shelly." He kissed the top of her head.

She kissed his cheek. "You're welcome. Come on, let's go play!" she said, jumping to her feet and tugging on his hand.

He smiled and got to his feet, following her over to a group of kids who were playing with toys out of a communal box. They played until Jenny called everyone back together for snack time, and Jasper pulled his guitar back out to play Happy Birthday as they sung for three small kids celebrating their 3rd, 5th, and 8th birthdays. Jasper declined a cupcake of his own, but accepted the bite Shelly offered, insisting that cupcakes made her happy, so they'd make Jasper not-sad.

Jasper envied her way of thinking that mad everything so simple.

He left when Jenny let him know that the kids would be asked to return to their room in a little while. He said his goodbyes and promised to come back again, accepting handshakes from a few dads and grateful hugs from a couple of moms.

Jasper stopped at the grocery store on his way back to campus to stock up on milk, bread, and a couple of other things to round out his pantry and snack drawer of his desk. His class schedule may have been more balanced than the previous semester, but office hours and all the extra responsibilities meant that he needed to keep something on hand.

He had to keep himself from running to Edward's dorm when he saw the tour bus in the parking lot when he returned to campus. Jasper forced himself to take a deep breath and return to his room to put away his groceries, reminding himself that Edward had just been alone with 30-odd teenagers for three days, on little sleep, and probably needed some time to himself. Besides, if Jasper were to go find Edward, he was fairly certain they wouldn't make it to dinner. He missed Edward too much and he had too much he needed to talk about.

Which was why when he left for dinner, Jasper felt himself withdrawing inward. A campus wide dinner wasn't the place to bring anything up, and Jasper knew that if he started, he wouldn't be able to stop, not with how much turmoil he had building inside.

So, he changed into a Forks Academy polo with his trousers, slipped into his loafers, and pulled on his trench coat like it was a mental as much as physical barrier from the elements, and left for the dining hall.

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So, I hope that's not a bad place to leave you for the holidays. I promise there will be a chapter in the week between Christmas and New Year's, so you won't have to go too long without an update (since I know you're all dying to know what will happen now, though the path we're on should be pretty clear).


	37. Chapter 36: On the Road Again

**Welcome back, lovelies! I hope everyone had a great holiday!**

**Thanks as always to Naelany and wishingforlove.**

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When Edward got back to campus on Sunday afternoon it was all he could do to not run to Jasper's room. There was little chance they'd make it to dinner if he did. Besides, he needed to find Bella first and see if he could figure out why she'd called and left a tearful apology on his phone.

But before he did anything, he needed to put his things away and take a shower. Spending ten hours on a bus with thirty five teenagers had left him twitchy and frustrated. Though maybe a swim would work better in terms of letting him unwind, Edward thought as he hung his suit bag in the closet. Part of the problem with the bus ride had been his inability to move around, which had made his legs stiffen up. A swim would loosen him up and let him burn off the anxious tension he'd been carrying since he'd gotten the message from Bella the evening before.

She'd called while he was in the shower back at the hotel after the concert and subsequent tour of the campus with the students. All he'd managed to decipher was that she was sorry for something and she was turning her phone off.

Edward changed into his swim clothes and tugged on a pair of sweats and a hoodie. Campus was quiet as he made the trek across to the gym; it wasn't unusual for a Sunday afternoon. Most students were likely studying and the faculty in residence sleeping in or getting a jump on the week ahead.

The pool was empty when Edward waded into the shallow end, leaving his cane, clothes, and towel on the deck. He lost himself in the rhythm of his strokes as he worked the tension out his body. Slowly, the muscles in his legs began to loosen, and the stiff tension in his neck and arms was replaced by a more satisfying ache. When he climbed out of the pool forty five minutes later he felt much more relaxed and rested. He re-dressed quickly after roughly toweling dry and headed back to his room, looking forward to a hot shower.

Edward's phone beeped as he let himself back into his room. He crossed to where he'd left it on the bed and smiled as he opened the text from Jasper.

_Welcome home. Missed you. See you at dinner?_

He typed out his own message before tossing the phone on the bed and going to take a shower. He lingered as he rinsed the chlorine from his hair and skin. Out of the shower he dressed professionally casual in jeans, a button up and a sweater before tugging on his Chucks. Edward gathered his phone, keys, and anything else he might need, and locked up before starting toward Bella's dorm.

Edward found Bella packing up her belongings, dressed in yoga pants and layered tank tops, her hair pulled back into a messy bun with strands falling loose. He tapped on the open door of her room to get her attention before he entered. "Going somewhere?" he asked lightly.

She gave him a tired smile. "Moving. Alice is going to let me have the other side of her suite; it's the only empty room available right now," she said, waving in him.

He found an empty space on the bed and settled, kicking his shoes off. "Why?"

Bella sighed as she folded another top into her suitcase. "James was lurking around Friday night. He'll have a hard time peeking into Alice's suite since she's upstairs, and he won't necessarily know where I've gone."

"What?" Edward asked. He thought she had a restraining order against him. "He was here? Did he do anything? Where was Jasper? Or Emmett?" Even with the protective order, they shouldn't have let her be out by herself.

"Slow down, Edward," Bella said patiently. "I'd gone out with Alice, Rose, and Emmett, and Alice and I came back together. As soon as I realized he was lurking, I ran for Jasper's room and stayed there. James didn't do anything to me but scare me. He was arrested later and spent the night in jail; I called and reported him yesterday morning."

"He didn't do anything?" Edward clarified.

"James didn't do anything," Bella repeated. "I want to be safe, so I'm relocating. Rose and Alice will be in the same building, so I won't have to walk home alone or make anyone go out of their way. I know it's no trouble," she said before he could interrupt, "but this will be better. Emmett, Rose, and Alice are going to help me move after dinner tonight."

"Jasper and I can help," Edward added.

Bella shook her head. "You and Jasper need some time," she said firmly. "We'll be fine. I don't have that much, really, that has to be moved tonight."

"You're sure?" He clarified. At her nod, he let it go. Edward wanted to ask her about Jasper, but first he needed to find out what had prompted the phone call. "So, I got a voice mail from you last night…" he suggested.

Bella sighed again and nodded, fixing her eyes on the suitcase she was packing. She folded another shirt into the suitcase and reached for another.

Edward leaned over and gently took her hand. "What happened, Bella? I didn't understand much of the message – I must have been in a bad spot for reception," he lied easily. He lightly tugged on her hand so she'd come sit down with him.

"I went to Jasper's last night, since everyone else was gone, and I didn't want to risk James slipping into the building behind me or a student," she explained quietly after she sat down beside him.

Edward nodded and gave her hand a gentle squeeze.

"It was raining and I was soaked and freezing, so Jas loaned me some clothes and let me stay the night, since we thought James might still be out there. I was scared and really just needed someone to be there, so I wouldn't let him sleep on the floor, knowing he wouldn't let me," she said, her voice dropping to a whisper. "I knew he missed you and I thought we could both use the comfort, and didn't think anything of it."

"Okay," Edward said. So far he wasn't hearing anything worth apologizing over. It sounded completely like Jasper to stay with her through the night; he knew his partner still felt partially responsible for some of James' actions since breaking up their fight in the fall.

"I know he hadn't been sleeping much," she continued in a quiet voice, a blush starting to spread across her cheeks. "And he woke up a bit – confused," she said. "But I'll let him tell you those details," she said, pink cheeked. "I was somewhere between asleep and awake, so I wasn't quite sure what was real and what wasn't, but he was really embarrassed when I asked about it, and let it go."

Edward was confused, but nodded.

"After breakfast, he walked me home, even though James was supposed to be in custody," Bella said, dropping Edward's hand and picking at the afghan over her bed. "I kissed him," she whispered.

That was all? She'd kissed Jasper before. "Why are you apologizing for that, love?" Edward asked softly.

"I kissed your boyfriend, Edward," she answered, sounding exasperated.

"Did he kiss you back?" He had a feeling he knew the answer to that, thinking about their discussion from New Year's.

"No," she said, ducking her head, her cheeks turning pink again.

"Hey, come here," he said gently, shifting to sit up a bit and she reluctantly moved closer so he could wrap his arms around her. He kissed the top of her head lightly. "I'm not mad."

"Why not?" She seemed reassured and relaxed slightly.

"Why did you kiss him?" He asked gently.

Bella sighed again. "I don't know," she admitted. "I didn't really think about it. Jasper was there, and he's been so affectionate with me, and I think maybe I read more into things than I should have." She pinked slightly again. "I know he loves me like a sister, and I crossed a line with him," she whispered sadly.

"We both love you, sweetheart," Edward reminded her. "Don't forget that. And my guess is that Jasper's more freaked out about you kissing him than you are," he said lightly.

Bella choked on a noise that sounded like she was trying to disagree.

"You feel guilty," Edward explained quietly. "Which I'd tell you to stop doing, but I know it's futile. But there's more going on in Jasper's head than you know about. Remember before New Year's when he ran off for awhile to think?"

She nodded silently.

"He had asked me if I was jealous when I found you two curled up together when he was trying to help you feel better. I reminded him of how you and I got started," Edward said with a small smile. "You're a gorgeous woman, Bella, and anyone would be lucky to have you in their life." He paused for a minute, internally debating over whether or not to share the bulk of the conversation with her, and deciding that he had to, for all of their sakes. "We talked about what it meant in our relationship that I'm bisexual, he continued. "And the short of the conversation was that he'd be willing to share me with one person, because that person is someone we both love and trust."

Bella was quiet a moment before she sniffled and asked "Me?" in a quiet voice.

"You," he confirmed.

"But why would he even say something like that?" she asked quietly. "I mean – you two are so clearly in love with each other."

Edward nodded. "He's worried that he won't be enough to satisfy all of my needs," he said simply. "I tried to reassure him that that wasn't the case, and then tried to see if he could understand where I was coming from. Unfortunately," he said dryly, "that's what kicked off his need to walk and sort things out."

"In questioning you, he questioned himself," Bella concluded quietly.

Edward hummed his agreement. "So, it's my guess that when you kissed him, after whatever misunderstanding had happened in the morning, he's completely confused, while you're sitting here feeling guilty for something I don't blame you for."

Bella was quiet again. Edward held her, and felt her deep breath against his arm when she started to speak again. "I love you both too, y'know," she said softly. "It's just…sometimes I wish things were different."

"Different how?" Edward asked.

She sniffed again quietly and shook her head. "It's…never mind. It doesn't matter."

"It matters to me," Edward responded.

"You know the saying 'the good ones are gay or taken'?" she asked. "In this case, both?"

"Sweetheart," Edward sighed softly.

She squeezed his forearm around her waist. "It's okay," she assured him, turning to face him with a sad smile. "I'll be fine. I just want you guys to be happy."

There was something else going on in her pretty little head, but Edward was damned if he was going to get it figured out in the short time they had before dinner, and Bella still had packing to do. There was a lot they were going to have to sort out, and none of their busy schedules were going to help anything. "We want you to be happy too," he said honestly.

"I know," she answered with a nod.

Edward kissed the top of her head again and gave her another hug before releasing her. "Alright, what can I do to help? We've got a little time before we need to leave for dinner."

Bella pointed at another pile of clothes and a suitcase. "Help me fold?"

"Sure," Edward answered, turning his body so he could reach. "You said Jasper hadn't been sleeping much," he started as he reached for clothes to fold into the suitcase. "How was he after I left?"

"Sad, tired, quiet," Bella answered. "I left him one of your gifts Friday and that seemed to help some, but I also just stuck close at breakfast and dinner."

"Thanks for being here for him. Us," Edward said. He knew Jasper would find some comfort in Bella, but he knew it was going to lead to some confusing times for all of them.

"You've both been here for me so much, it's the least I could do," Bella answered, carefully folding a sweater into the suitcase.

"I still appreciate it," Edward said.

The smile he got in return helped him feel better about everything. They continued to chat as they finished getting Bella's clothes packed up for everyone to help her retrieve after dinner. Edward filled her in on how the concert had gone, and reported that he'd been able to deliver her notes to some of her old professors on campus.

Bella changed into jeans and a sweater before they left for dinner. They walked to the cafeteria together, Bella's hand in Edward's. Jasper was waiting for them just inside the building, out of the rain. Bella flushed and stammered when Jasper greeted her, obviously still bothered by what had happened the previous day. Jasper, though, just gave her a warm smile (that didn't quite reach his eyes) and brushed his fingers against her hand as he reached to take Edward's. Bella excused herself and Edward allowed himself to be pulled into a hug.

"Welcome back," Jasper whispered.

"It's good to be home," Edward said softly, taking in Jasper's appearance. He looked worn and tired, his shoulders slightly hunched like he was carrying a heavy burden. His eyes were dull, with dark shadows starting to form underneath. "She really threw you for a loop, didn't she?" he asked softly.

Jasper's eyes widened a bit. "She told you?"

Edward nodded, brushing his lips lightly across Jasper's. "She called me to apologize, which is why I went to see her first. But we can talk about it after dinner?"

Jasper nodded and his arms tightened around Edward for a moment before letting him go.

Edward gave his hand a tug. "Come on. Let's get dinner, and then we'll go back to yours and talk, okay?"

"Yeah," Jasper agreed softly. He looked slightly lost, and Edward's heart hurt a little bit. He had no idea how they were going to endure five more weeks before their lives returned to normal.

Edward led Jasper into the service area and they grabbed their food before going in search of the others. They were seated at a round table, as usual, Bella between Alice and Esme, leaving open seats between Emmett and Carlisle for Edward and Jasper to take.

Jasper was understandably quiet through dinner, though Edward still worried. The Dean's remarks were thankfully short, which allowed Edward to make their excuses and slip away quicker than he had planned.

When they reached Jasper's room, they left the overhead lights out, and Jasper turned on the small reading lamp over the bed. Edward kicked off his shoes and settled at the head of Jasper's bed, propping himself up on Jasper's pillow. Jasper joined him after a heartbeat, settling between Edward's legs, with his back to Edward's chest after grabbing his laptop from the table.

"Tell me what happened yesterday morning?" Edward asked quietly, his cheek against Jasper's temple.

"What did Bella tell you?" Jasper asked in return.

"Just that you'd woken up confused and were really embarrassed," Edward explained.

Jasper sighed and explained in a soft voice how he'd woken up with a warm body and had felt her up before he'd realized that it wasn't Edward that he was in bed with. If Jasper hadn't been so humiliated by the experience, Edward would have thought it was funny.

"And then she kissed you after you walked her home?" Edward asked.

Jasper nodded.

"Are you okay?"

"I'm…I'm really fucking confused, Edward," Jasper stammered. "My head and my heart don't agree, and I can't make sense of anything. I ran myself into exhaustion last night and still didn't get more than a couple hours sleep, and I just don't know what to do."

Edward turned Jasper's face toward him so he could kiss him. "Talk to me, Jas. Tell me what's wrong."

Jasper sat quietly for a moment. "Here," he said, handing over his laptop. "Start by reading this."

Edward frowned as he took the computer, leaving one hand on Jasper's hip as he used the other to balance the laptop and scroll through the word document that was untitled and open on the desktop. He read it through twice, feeling Jasper's conflict through the words on the screen. He shut the lid and slid the computer away, wrapping both arms around Jasper again. Edward took a moment to collect his thoughts before he started speaking.

"You nearly had a psych major, right?"

Jasper nodded.

"Take any classes on human sexuality?" Edward asked gently.

"Not directly, but there were a few sections in various classes. Why?" Jasper asked, sounding curious.

"Do you think sexual orientation is fixed?" Edward posed.

"I don't know," Jasper said. "I've never really thought about it," Jasper mused. "Why?"

"Just a thought," Edward said. "We constantly change and develop over time, right? Our tastes change as we mature; we don't always like the same foods as children as we do as adults. Who is to say that sexual orientation is fixed in one direction? Why can't our sexual preferences develop as we mature as well?"

"It's possible I guess," Jasper conceded. "But I'm nearly thirty-one years old, Edward. Isn't it a bit late for me to be experimenting with my sexual orientation?"

Edward couldn't help but smile at the dry way Jasper asked. "I don't know babe, honestly," he said lightly. "But think about something for a minute." He waited for Jasper's nod before he continued. "You asked me how I knew I was bisexual, and I explained it the best I could, that it's the person I'm interested in, rather than their gender. What if it's not so much that there's a possibility that you have some, I don't know, repressed sexual desire for women, but that it's just Bella?"

He felt Jasper take a long breath and exhale slowly. Edward made circles on Jasper's hips with his thumbs as he gave him the time to process.

"That…makes sense," Jasper said slowly, but then fell silent for a moment. "She still reminds me of my baby sister," he whispered.

"How, love?" Edward prompted. "Physically? Emotionally?"

"In her personality," Jasper said. "Always wanting to make sure everyone around her is taken care of. Always trying to see the best in people. A bright, warm person, who brings life to everyone around her."

Edward hugged Jasper a bit tighter. "Is that so bad?"

Jasper shook his head. "No, but it still freaks me out a little bit." He sighed. "I get what you're trying to say, Edward, and it makes sense, but…"

"It's all coming at you at once," Edward finished.

"Yeah," Jasper said with a nod. He shifted onto his side and nestled against Edward. "I'm tired, and it's all just…" he made a motion with his hand, turning his wrist and wriggling his fingers.

"Your head and your heart don't agree," Edward murmured.

"Yeah," Jasper said again. "I love you so much, Edward, and I care deeply about Bella, but my mind's trying to make me choose, but something tells me I don't have to, and I really don't want to. But I'm having a very hard time reconciling what I know about myself and what I've wanted in the past to what's happening now. And I'm scared."

Edward recalled Jasper's question to himself in his note, about not knowing what he wanted. "What are you afraid of?"

Jasper sighed. "I don't want to ruin things with you or Bella. I want to not be confused by all of this, but I'm afraid to lose you both in the process."

"Jasper, listen to me. I'm not going anywhere," Edward assured him. "We'll get this figured out, the three of us. It may not be right away, but I promise, I'm not going anywhere. You may need to sit down with Bella next week though," he explained. "She's feeling incredibly guilty, but I kind of explained why you reacted the way you did. You should talk to her."

The blonde nodded. "I will. I need to apologize anyway. I'm not sure she got my message."

"Okay." Edward yawned. "Can I stay here so we can both get some sleep?"

"Please," Jasper breathed. "I was going to ask if you didn't."

Edward turned his head so he could kiss Jasper again. "Let's get changed and lie down then, and we can talk some more, if you want?"

Jasper nodded. They untangled themselves and Edward bummed a pair of Jasper's sweats to start the night in. He had little doubt they'd end up with less clothes on as the night progressed. Jasper snagged them bottled water before they curled back up in the bed together. Jasper took his regular position on his back with Edward cuddled up against his side.

"How was your trip?" Jasper asked once they were settled and the light was out.

Edward laughed quietly. Leave it to them to deal with the heavy stuff first. "Let's just say that I have a newfound respect for Mr. Jones, the band director at my high school."

Jasper's chuckle rumbled through both of their bodies.

Edward smiled. "Fortunately, they're all good kids and I didn't have too much trouble with them. I had to break up a couple that got a little…friendly…in the aisle of the bus, but mostly they were all well behaved. Which was good, because I had no other adult supervision for them."

"That really doesn't seem like a good idea," Jasper observed. "I remember high school."

Edward laughed again quietly. "Yeah, well, it's hard to get the parents to help since the kids are pretty far from home, and most of the faculty teaches on Fridays so it's hard convincing the dean to let us steal anyone."

Jasper nodded, his nose brushing against the top of Edward's head. "Still seems like a recipe for disaster."

Edward shrugged awkwardly. "If it were the younger classes, yeah, but with the upperclassmen, they pretty much know what they're facing if they get in trouble."

"True," Jasper agreed.

"But the concert went well," Edward continued. "I didn't screw anything up, and the students were great."

"I knew you would do fine," Jasper said after kissing Edward softly.

Edward smiled and rested his head on Jasper's chest. "You know, if we put as much faith in ourselves as we did each other, we'd be able to take over the world."

Jasper laughed softly and slid his hand up Edward's back. "Yeah, you're probably right," he murmured.

They continued to talk quietly as they exchanged kisses and caresses. Edward didn't lose his pants as he thought he might, though Jasper's fingers had slipped under the waistband to run his fingers lightly over the base of his spine as Edward slid into sleep.

Jasper's alarm woke them early the next morning. Edward groaned and burrowed closer to Jasper as Jasper reached up to silence the bleeping. "I don't want to get up," he whined without opening his eyes.

"Sorry baby, it's Monday," Jasper said. "I don't think the Dean is going to let us take a sick day so we can stay curled up in bed together."

Edward faked a cough and a sniffle. "I think I'm coming down with something."

"Poor baby," Jasper said, completely unsympathetically. He kissed Edward softly. "We can blow off the gym, though, and stay in bed a bit longer."

"Mm, I like that plan," Edward muttered. He shifted his body slightly and dozed back off to the quiet rhythm of Jasper's breathing. He heard voices as he slept lightly, feeling the rumble of Jasper's voice against his cheek.

Edward was gently shaken awake some time later. "Baby, it's time to get up."

"Hmph," was Edward's inelegant response, but he opened his eyes.

Jasper had turned onto his side and was looking down at Edward with a soft smile on his face. "It's after seven," he said quietly. "You've got to get moving to make it to breakfast and get to class on time."

"Is that your way of kicking me out?" Edward asked as he turned over and sat up.

"This is my way of saying that unless you want to spend the day in clothes you wore to dinner last night, you should probably go back to yours and shower," Jasper explained.

"If I wear clothes of shame can I shower with you?" Edward asked innocently.

Jasper sighed in defeat and let his head fall onto Edward's shoulder. Edward laughed softly and kissed his temple.

"Can't blame me for trying, can you? I've missed you," Edward said softly.

"I've missed you too, baby," Jasper answered quietly. Edward felt his lips move against his skin. "But we've got to be responsible adults today."

Edward nodded, knowing it was all true. "I'll see you at breakfast?"

"Absolutely," Jasper answered, lifting his head and kissing Edward softly.

Edward smiled, kissed him in return, and slid from the bed. "I'm stealing this back," he said, lifting his hoodie from the back of the chair. He'd find a way to slip it back to Jasper before he left again on Friday. He tugged it on, not worried about returning to his dorm in the sweats – he'd look like he was coming from the gym.

"Okay," Jasper answered.

Edward stepped into his shoes and gathered his clothes as Jasper handed him a small duffle.

"See you in a bit," Edward said, kissing Jasper softly again before leaving.

Back in his room he showered quickly, not bothering with a shave, and dressed in slacks, a button up gray shirt and black sweater. He tugged on gray socks and laced up his doc martens before gathering his materials and heading back out.

The bus ride had been worth one thing – it meant he'd gotten his grading done so when he'd gotten home Sunday he'd been able to focus on what was important – his relationships with Jasper and Bella.

Edward grabbed a tray when he entered the dining hall and settled on a bowl of oatmeal with raisins and brown sugar to go with his coffee and toast with peanut butter. He made his way through the building to find everyone else. Bella and Alice were, as usual, already seated.

"Good morning," he said as he joined them, sitting next to Bella.

"Hi," she said softly.

"Morning, cousin," Alice greeted him more enthusiastically.

"Did you get settled?" Edward asked Bella as he stirred his breakfast. As much as he and Jasper had needed to talk, he felt bad for not being there to help Bella move.

"More or less," she responded. "It's livable, and I'll have time to get it sorted the rest of the way during the week and over the weekend."

"What are you doing with your extra stuff, Alice?" Edward asked.

"Taking to Carlisle and Esme's. Esme's letting me set up in a corner of the basement for now. I'll have to rearrange my studio space in town and I don't have time just now."

Edward nodded.

"Mornin'," Jasper said, taking the seat on Bella's other side.

"Hi, Jasper," Alice chirped.

"Good morning," Bella responded, sounding subdued.

Edward watched as Jasper slid something from his tray in front of Bella and leaned in close, brushing a piece of hair off her shoulder. He couldn't hear what Jasper said, but Bella seemed to relax and accept his offering, which Edward soon deduced was hot chocolate. Jasper's arm stretched across the back of Bella's chair and his fingers brushed Edward's shoulder.

Edward understood the gesture. Jasper needed to sit next to Bella to help ease her anxiety over what had occurred over the weekend, and he leaned into Jasper's touch in response. Jasper withdrew his hand so he could eat, and Edward turned his attention back to his breakfast as well.

Emmett and Rosalie joined them a few minutes later, and everyone caught up over a fairly normal Monday breakfast.

Edward's day went fairly quickly. He had a lesson first thing, followed by his theory class. From 10:45 until 1:30, Edward had his physical therapy, lunch, and lessons. The music history class met from 1:45 to 2:45, and he had lessons scheduled until the Wind Ensemble met at 4:15. When the two hour rehearsal was over, Edward made his students clear the rehearsal hall by stacking the chairs and racking the stands before they, and he, could leave for the dining hall.

Jasper was waiting for him when Edward reached the dining hall, his bag draped over his shoulder loaded with the scores he needed to review once again. "Hey," Jasper greeted him with a smile. "How was your day?"

"Long," Edward commented, but grinned. "I'll get used to it." The addition of therapy over his prep period had put a crimp in things, but Edward wasn't ready to sacrifice the promise of progress that he'd already seen after the couple months of treatment with Jane.

"Hm," Jasper said with a nod, his hand skimming up Edward's shoulders and rubbing lightly at his neck. "Well, let me at least feed you, then," he offered, steering Edward toward the service area before dropping his hand.

"Sounds good. I'm starving," Edward commented. They got their food and found the others. Edward enjoyed his meal and the others' company and somewhat reluctantly split from Jasper's company so they could get work done. It appeared that neither of them had managed much prep work over the weekend.

The rest of the week passed fairly similarly. Edward was still adjusting to the new schedule, but by Friday it felt comfortable enough that he thought it wouldn't be a shock to his system come Monday morning.

Edward smacked his alarm clock when it rang Friday morning, jolting him from sleep. The week had gone better than the one previous, and though he'd desperately wanted to, Edward hadn't gone to Jasper's to sleep Thursday night. They'd hung out, but Edward had returned to his room to pack for the weekend and sleep.

Though the bus wasn't coming until 8:30, and they wouldn't be leaving until 9, Edward had a reason for getting up early. He grabbed the bag he'd packed the night before and set off for Emmett and Jasper's suite. He tapped lightly on Emmett's door and was given admittance. He waited as Emmett went through the kitchenette to retrieve Jasper, and left the door open behind him as he and Jasper went out Jasper's door on their way to the gym.

Edward waited a minute in Emmett's room before passing through to Jasper's. He set the bag on the bed and rifled through it, pulling out a few things. First was the hoodie Edward had stolen back on Monday morning. He'd washed it, then worn it as much as possible for the next three days. He folded it up and left it on Jasper's pillow.

He hesitated for a moment before he popped open the disc drive on Jasper's laptop and loaded in the demo CD he'd made over Thanksgiving. Edward set it to play on repeat when the media player opened, and he left the note on the keyboard. He was disappointed to find (as he'd thought) that Jasper's computer was an old enough model to not have a built in web-cam, but he figured he'd manage to come up with another way to talk to Jasper while he was gone.

Next to the computer Edward left a new coffee mug, printed with big bold text 'World's Best Lover' and a small packet of ground coffee.

With a smile, Edward packed up the last few things in the bag and locked the door behind him as he snuck back out. The rest was going over to the office so Bella could help him out. It felt somewhat awkward, asking her to help him be romantic for Jasper, but she'd honestly seemed eager to help. Edward had one more weekend (after his trip to Salem) on the road before he had a free one, and he hoped they could find some way to stay connected until then.

Bella had left her office unlocked the previous evening after her office hours at Edward's request. He dropped the bag under her desk where Jasper wouldn't see it, and placed a box of her favorite tea on her desk as a small thank you before he left. On his way back to his room, he stopped at the dining hall for a quick breakfast that he carried out with him.

Back at his room he pulled his suit bag from the closet; he'd only need it if his group won the high school division portion of the competition at the festival and performed at the evening concert, but they'd been in second and third places the two years previous, so he had confidence it was possible. Edward changed into a long sleeve t-shirt and pulled one of his Forks Academy polo shirts over the top, and tugged on his comfortable jeans. Spending at least seven hours on a bus, he wanted to be as comfortable as possible in his clothes since he knew he'd rapidly grow uncomfortable in his body.

His phone rang on the table next to him and he smiled as he picked it up and read Jasper's name on the caller ID display. "'Lo?"

"World's Best Lover?" Jasper asked.

Edward laughed lowly as he tilted his head to secure the phone on his shoulder. "Yup."

"I'll have to try to not let that go to my head," Jasper said dryly. "Thank you, though," he said, his voice a bit softer. "I appreciate it."

Edward smiled. "You're welcome, lover."

"I'll let you go. I need to get to breakfast, and I'm running a bit behind" Jasper said quietly. "Love you. Be safe."

"I love you too," Edward responded. "I'll see you on Sunday."

"Okay. Bye."

"Bye, Jas," Edward said, and heard the connection end. He tucked the phone into his pocket and finished packing up his laptop. By the time he had finished double checking everything it was time for him to go meet the bus and begin the process of chasing down a few wayward students (there were always two or three who couldn't arrive anywhere on time).

After having to send Susan, one of the trumpet players, to retrieve the rhythm section from the dining hall, the bus was finally loaded with all their gear and personnel and they hit the road at 9:15.

The seven hour drive to Salem seemed to be just as long as the one to Pullman had been the week before. At least Edward had a smaller group to look after on the trip to Oregon – only twenty students. They still had a whole charter bus, so the students were happy they had seats to themselves, and Edward was relieved that the onboard monitors kept them occupied with movies. He only had to settle an argument when they were choosing the first movie.

Edward worked on correcting papers from the music history class, his iPod drowning out the movies the students were watching. They stopped for lunch in Centralia and Edward took the opportunity to walk around and practice a few of the discrete stretches Jane had shown him that week. He also took advantage of the few moments of privacy to call and leave a voice mail for Jasper, knowing he was in class and his phone would be silent or in his office. He grabbed a cup of coffee before herding the students back onto the bus for a head count.

The rest of the drive carried on without problems. A lot of the students pulled out headphones and slipped into their own little worlds, though Edward looked up from his own work every so often and saw conversations going on between some pairs or trios.

The driver pulled over for another quick stop at a rest area just north of Portland and everyone took the time to use the restrooms and stretch. Edward tried to limit the break to fifteen minutes so they could get back on the road and to the hotel at a halfway decent time. They were staying at a hotel with a Denny's in the same parking lot, so they'd be able to grab dinner after they got checked in and unloaded the bus. Edward was supposed to enforce a two-hour study session, but he'd observed enough studying happening on the bus that he wasn't going to make that happen.

Edward was the only one that got off the bus when they first pulled into the lot. Thanks to Angela's planning, he was able to get everyone checked in easily, and the hotel staff had already prepared the keys in sets for each group.

"Alright!" he called when he reboarded the bus. The kids settled down after a moment and gave him their attention.

"It is," he glanced at his watch. "5:18. You have until 6:30 to get your gear off the bus, find your rooms, clean up, whatever. I want to see you all in Denny's at 6:30. We will eat as a group tonight, and for dinner tomorrow before the evening concert. You're on your own for breakfast; the hotel has a complimentary continental breakfast. There's more information about that in your rooms. Questions?"

When no one spoke up, he pulled the room assignment list from his bag. "Susan, Jo, Liz, and Jenn," he called. The group of girls was generally more responsible and he could trust them to stay out of trouble while he sorted out the boys. He knew there were going to be issues with the boys' rooming assignments. There always were.

He handed Susan the four room keys and let them step by to get their bags and horns from the compartments under the bus. The bus driver had opened everything while Edward spoke.

Edward ordered the boys off the bus, and then put them into their groups. Daniel bitched about having room with Quil, and Liam looked scared to death at the prospect of having to share a room with Felix and Demetri. Edward sorted them out best he could, made note of the changes on his roster, and sent them all off to get settled.

He tiredly grabbed his own bags from his front seat of the bus and double checked with the driver that they'd be ready to go at 9 am the next morning. With his bag on his shoulder, Edward grabbed his rolling suitcase and suit bag from under the bus and made his way into the hotel. The elevator was thankfully functioning and easy to find. His room was at the end of the hall, and the students were in the surrounding rooms. As he passed them they were quiet, and he hoped that they'd be as well behaved as the Wind Ensemble had been the weekend before.

It was a quarter to six when Edward dumped his bag on the bed after hanging the suit in the closet-like alcove and parked his suitcase. The hotel had a pool, but he'd be unable to indulge until after dinner. Instead, he flopped down on the bed and stretched out. He had already decided that if he was still Director of Bands the following academic year, he'd be asking for an assistant to travel with him on trips. He needed someone who could focus on the administrative details of the tours so Edward could focus more on the music.

Of course, someone who could help keep the students in line would be a plus, too.

With a sigh, Edward pulled himself up leaving his legs stretched out in front of him as he faced the television. He pulled his phone from his pocket and sent Jasper a text, knowing he'd be at dinner with the others. After a moment his phone beeped with the arrival of a new message and saw Jasper's relaying of everyone's well wishes. Edward would call him when he got back from dinner with the kids.

With that, he tossed the phone down on the bed and shuffled to the bathroom to wash his face. He grabbed the department credit card from the paperwork in his bag and shoved it into the back pocket of his jeans so he could pay for everyone's meals. Edward tucked his phone back into his pocket, shrugged into his jacket, and headed back out to meet the band at the Denny's in the parking lot.

Edward spoke to the hostess and let her know what he needed. With twenty one of them, he wasn't expecting them to be served as a party, but if they could sit in the same section and have all their tabs put together, it would make things easier. The hostess assured him it wouldn't be a problem and excused herself to make sure there were enough seats available in one section for all of them.

As his students trickled in, Edward kept a tally, and by 6:28 they had all arrived. Most had changed out of their travelling clothes (which had mostly consisted of pajamas and hoodies), and a couple of the girls had damp hair pulled up out of their faces. They were seated a few minutes later, and the group mixed up, leaving Edward a seat to himself in a booth where he could keep an eye on everyone.

Dinner was thankfully drama free, and Edward used the chance to go over last minute things with the students as they were finishing their meals.

"I need your attention, guys," he called somewhat loudly as he rose from his seat. The kids turned toward him, more or less, while still picking at their plates.

"I know we've been over this already, but bear with me, alright? Same rules apply here as apply on campus. Quiet time starts at 10 pm and lasts until 7 am. I _will_ be keeping tabs on you this evening, so don't think you can sneak out. You may use the hotel pool and lobby, but you may not, under any circumstances, leave the hotel once we return tonight. Any questions?"

The students shook their heads no.

"I'm in the room at the end of the hall if you need anything, and you all have my mobile number. Like I said, you're on your own for breakfast. The hotel has a complimentary breakfast, or you may come over here, but you will be responsible for paying your own tab if you eat over here," he explained. "The bus will be ready for us at 8:30 in the morning; we will be leaving at 9 am. I want you all in uniform, with your music and instrument by 8:45. It's going to be a long day, and we won't be back here until after the evening concert tomorrow night, so make sure you have everything you need. We'll be walking to dinner at a restaurant not far from the college campus to have dinner as a group again. Questions?"

Alec raised his hand. "Lunch tomorrow?"

Edward smiled. "I have passes for you to be able to eat in the dining hall on campus." He was surrounded by groans and he couldn't help but laugh. "There will be an hour break for lunch, and if you wish to go off campus, I'll allow it, but you have to go with a buddy, and you i_will_/i be back within the hour. There are a few places near campus where you'll be able to eat; Subway, McDonald's, a couple other places," he recalled from memory. "Others?"

When no one else spoke up, Edward finished. "Alright. Y'all get enough to eat?" He grimaced as they laughed; apparently he'd started picking up on a couple of Jasper's speech patterns. "Shut it," he grumbled good naturedly. "Have a good evening. Back in the hotel by 8:30 please," he said, glancing at his watch. It was 7:45, and that would give them time to hang out a bit if they wanted. "Try to get some sleep, relax. You're not old enough to order porn," he reminded them, "And remember that the hotel receipt will tell me what room it was and I'll have to phone your parents," he said as a warning. "Also, you'll notice I haven't dictated the mandatory homework time," he pointed out. "But that doesn't mean you can slack off completely. That's all," he finished. "You know where to find me if you need anything."

They all nodded and murmured their assents. Edward returned to his seat and the conversations around him picked back up. Their server came back around and did one last sweep for orders. A few students ordered coffee and dessert, and Edward asked for a piece of pie to go. Once they were taken care of, Edward settled the bill at the front counter, and took his pie back to the hotel, trusting his students to not be a menace in his absence.

Back in his room, Edward sent Jasper another quick text and changed to go for a quick swim to unwind, after he stuck his pie into the mini fridge. He swam just long enough for his body to loosen up. He wrapped a towel around his waist after he tried to dry himself off enough that he wasn't dripping as he made his way back to his room. He took a quick shower and changed into flannel pants and a thermal top and made the rounds to check on his students before leaving his door cracked open and calling Jasper as he'd promised.

"Yea-ah," Jasper answered, his drawl extremely pronounced.

Edward laughed softly. "Hey, baby."

"Hi, Edward," Jasper answered. "How's your trip?" he asked.

"Good so far. What're you up to?" Edward asked with a grin.

"Em's trying to get me drunk," Jasper reported.

"Oh, really?"

"Mmhm," Jasper said sagely.

"Where are you?" Edward asked, concerned. He didn't think his brother would let Jasper get drunk alone, but Emmett had more sense than to drink and drive, especially since Edward's accident.

"Mom and dad's," Jasper drawled. "Mom's taking good care of us. Keepin' us in snacks 'n stuff."

Edward smiled and shook his head. He wondered how much of the conversation Jasper would remember in the morning. "Well, so long as you're having a good time."

"We are," Jasper assured him. "I miss you, though."

"I miss you too, baby," Edward said. "Have fun with my brother, and don't let him talk you into anything, alright?"

"Will do," Jasper promised. "I love you. Good luck tomorrow. No, wait, that's wrong. Break a leg tomorrow."

Edward laughed softly again. "Thanks, Jas. I'll see you on Sunday."

"Love you."

"Love you too. Have a good night."

"You too. Bye, babe."

Edward disconnected the call with a smile. He wondered what his brother was up to in taking Jasper home to get him wasted, but he supposed Emmett had his motivations. At least they were someplace safe and he knew his parents would keep them from getting up to some of Emmett's usual tricks.

After 10, Edward did another quick check on his students then closed his door and settled in for the night. He found a movie to watch and tried to relax as he mentally prepared himself for the next day. It wasn't the first time he'd brought the group to Salem and he knew what to expect, but that didn't mean it couldn't still be a bit of a trying experience. There was some debate over whether or not music was a competitive sport, but so far, the festival had stuck to their guns with the judging scheme, and each band would be scored, and the winning band from each division (middle school and high school) would get to play the first half of the evening concert and share the stage with the guest artist before the university's band took the stage.

Edward shut the TV off when the movie was over and retrieved his bear from where he'd discreetly placed it at the bottom of his suitcase. He sent Jasper one last text for the night before shutting off all the lights and falling easily to sleep.

The festival day was long, just as Edward had warned his students. They had their fifteen minute set at 11:15, and once everyone had returned from lunch, Edward had let the students loose with orders to report back to the main hall at 5 for the awards ceremony. He found a quiet spot to sit for a few minutes and go over the performance in his head .

He spent the rest of the afternoon listening to a few of the other groups and letting his mind wander over the next couple of weekends. Edward would be in Yakima with both bands the next weekend, and then he'd be home for the following weekend. Though he'd have work to do, he hoped he'd get a chance to sit down and talk with Jasper and Bella so they could figure everything out. He didn't want to see anyone get hurt, and even though he and Jasper had gotten better about trusting each other and being open in their communication, there was something Bella was holding back, and he was worried that it was too soon after her relationship with James for her to be getting into anything new, if that's the way things ended up going. Edward couldn't say that a long term threesome relationship was something he'd ever considered before, but with him, Jasper, and Bella, it only seemed to fit. Bella was such an integral part of his and Jasper's lives already that it only seemed right. The emotional component of their relationship already seemed firmly in place; the physical was only another step they'd need to discuss, if that's where things went.

For his part, Edward had no qualms. He'd had one other sexual encounter with two partners at once, and it had been a very fun and interesting night. The idea of Jasper and Bella together intrigued (and excited) him; throwing himself into the mix was something he'd really only considered in daydreams. But he wouldn't push the idea on either of them. Jasper was dealing with enough on his own without Edward trying to influence him, and Bella...she would probably need a nudge to know it was alright because she'd be worried about how it would affect him and Jasper.

He found his thoughts wandering further out than they should have, and he shifted his focus back to the bands on stage and the rest of the festival.

At the awards ceremony, the Forks Academy Jazz Ensemble was awarded second place in the high school division. Edward could tell his students were disappointed, but he hoped that when they got the full report on Tuesday (that Edward read while the first place winner was announced) and learned that they'd only lost by one point they might be a bit consoled.

Dinner was fun as they ate together as a group at a little Italian restaurant not too far from campus. The students' spirits were buoyed by the good food and Edward's reassurances that they had performed very well and had nothing to be ashamed of. Besides, he pointed out, it meant that they got to sit back and relax for the evening concert instead of stressing out about having to go on stage again with a jazz legend in front of a packed house.

The evening concert went very well, and Edward enjoyed the show. The guest artist, a trumpet player, was very entertaining and worked well with the younger bands.

Edward's band was fairly subdued when they boarded the bus to return to the hotel for the night. As they drove through the city streets, Edward knelt on his seat to give his instructions for the night. It was basically a rehash of the evening before. Breakfast on their own, be at the bus by 9 for the ride home, quiet hours, etc. There hadn't been any problems Friday night and Edward didn't anticipate any that night, either.

Once he saw the students back to their rooms, he took a quick shower and changed, then settled on his bed with his laptop to check his messages and catch up on a little work.

He smiled when he logged into his email and found a message from Jasper.

_Edward, remind me to never, EVER, let your bother take me drinking again. I don't think I've ever had a hangover this bad. Probably because I didn't have anyone to take me out for my 21__st_

Edward winced in remembrance of his own 21st birthday, as hosted by his big brother. He felt a pang of sympathy for Jasper.

_Anyway – at least we had somewhere to stay. Your mom made Em surrender his keys when we walked through the door, so she must've known what he planned. She made cookies, and a huge batch of that cereal snack mix thing._

Though they had been responsible before, his family took driving under the influence very seriously since Edward's accident, so that news didn't surprise him at all. Neither did the fact that Emmett probably advised his parents about what he was up to.

_I spent the day at the house since we'd be back for diner anyway. The bed was too big without you, but it was nice to stretch out. __ Your mom fussed over me at breakfast and scolded Em like a child, but he took it well. It was funny to watch, even with the blinding headache._

Edward wondered if Jasper remembered calling Esme and Carlisle "mom and dad" the night before.

_Bella came over early and we had a chance to talk and cleared some things up. I think we all need to sit down together, Edward. I think this is more than the three of us think, and I can't bear to lose either one of you if someone gets hurt. There's more than Bella's telling me – I just can't figure out what._

Edward was relieved to know that he wasn't the only one to feel that way.

_Em's jealous that Esme asked what I wanted for dinner tonight, but I have a feeling that's not going to stop him from eating. ;) I'll try to save you some leftovers, but I wouldn't count on there being any. It's gotten really cold here the last couple days, and there's some talk of snow. Hopefully it'll hold off until you're back, if it happens. Anyway, I'd better go for now. Stay safe, and I hope you're having a good time and your performances went well. I love you, and I miss you. See you tomorrow._

Edward adjusted his computer on his lap and started typing.

_You drank with Emmett and survived to talk about it the next day? I'm impressed, lover. I think I slept the whole next day the last time I let him do that with me. Glad mom looked after you, though. I kind of hope there's some video of you two together. Especially if you don't remember our phone conversation from last night. I'm glad you and Bella got to talk and sorted things out. As soon as we have a chance, the three of us will talk, Jas, I promise. Our performance went well; we didn't win, but the students had fun. I'm being safe and I'll talk to you tomorrow. Love you, too._

He sent his reply, and took the ice bucket and his wallet from the room and made his way down the hall to the ice and soda machine. Root beer and ice in hand, Edward returned to his room. He looked up from his lock when he heard a door open down the hall, and watched as Susan slipped through the door, her backpack slung over her shoulder. He cleared his throat roughly, and she jumped.

"Going somewhere?" he asked.

"Just down to the desk, Mr. Cullen," she answered. "The desk clerk is helping me with something."

Edward raised an eyebrow, curious.

She blushed lightly and stammered. "Girl trouble, Mr. Cullen."

Edward nodded. Therein lay the problem with having only one adult along on the trip with no access to vehicles, though he did have a fully stocked first aid back pack amongst his things. "Alright. Don't leave the hotel."

She nodded and took off down the hall. Edward shook his head and stepped back into his room, once again leaving his door cracked open with the privacy long hinge in case any of the students needed anything from him.

He settled back on the bed with his soda and found a new reply from Jasper.

_I'm surprised you even remember your last drinking binge with Emmett. I remember bits and pieces about last night. I remember talking to you on the phone, but not the conversation. What did I say? Mostly I remember video games. Bells and I are alright. We're going to hang out next weekend while you're gone. Oh, and Emmett ate all the soup Esme made, so there won't be leftovers, though she did hide a piece of cake for you. I'll keep it safe in my room. ;) _

Edward laughed as he replied.

_You referred to mom and dad as, well, mom and dad. You know they'd love to hear it; mom especially already considers you one of her sons. If you were drinking with Emmett and there were cookies and snack mix, then I'm sure there were plenty of video games, and probably really stupid movies. What are your plans with Bella next week? Anything I should be worried about ;) Whoo, cake! Yum. Gives me an excuse to come straight to see you when I get home tomorrow._

They continued to email throughout the night, though Edward supposed either of them could have suggested an instant messenger service. Edward made some progress on his lesson plans for the week and after 10:30, closed his door and flipped through the channels until he found something to watch. He dozed off around midnight after setting his alarm for 7 the next morning.

Since he'd showered the night before, Edward dressed in another pair of comfortable jeans, t-shirt, and hoodie for the return trip to Forks. He grabbed a quick breakfast in the hotel lobby and returned to his room to finish packing and double checking that he had everything. At 8:15 he went by and knocked on the five rooms that his students occupied and made sure everyone was up and moving.

Edward dragged his stuff down to the bus and loaded it while he waited for everyone else. He waited patiently, chatting with the bus driver as the students trickled out. He gathered their room keys and told them to get situated on the bus.

He took the elevator back up, swept through the rooms quickly to make sure nothing had been left behind, and then checked out of the hotel. The students were quiet when he boarded the bus and gave the driver permission to leave. Edward figured he had a couple hours while the students dozed before he'd have to break up another argument about a movie.

True enough, as they climbed back on the bus after the first rest stop, Edward moderated a debate over film choice and everyone settled back down. The rest of the drive back to campus was quiet, though the students perked up a bit more after they stopped for lunch. While the students were engrossed in their movie, Edward reviewed his calendar. It was only then that he realized the following weekend was Valentine's Day (it wasn't like he'd been to a store or anything in the last couple weeks), and that he was going to be out of town. He started making notes about what he could do when he got back early Sunday afternoon, and a plan started coming together. He'd need to enlist the help of Bella (and probably his parents), but he smiled as he thought about the reaction he'd get. As he sketched the plans, a larger idea formed, and though he wasn't sure about how it would turn out, he thought he'd give it a try. Things seemed to be possibly going in that direction, and though none of them had talked, it couldn't hurt to give it push, he thought.

When they arrived on campus, Edward oversaw the unloading of the bus and took care of the necessary paperwork before grabbing his bags and heading for his room. He had enough time to grab a shower before he went to find Jasper before dinner.

* * *

I should be back to a regular posting schedule for awhile now. yay!


	38. Chapter 37: Torn to Tattered

**Thanks as always to Naelany and wishingforlove.**

**Is everyone sitting comfortably? Then let's begin.**

* * *

Jasper couldn't help but smile as he made his way quickly across campus to the dining hall on Friday morning. The gifts Edward had left him were thoughtful and what he needed to get through another weekend alone. Even though he'd already been running late, Jasper had spared a moment to stop the CD from playing and rip it into his iTunes so he could put it on his iPod when he got back that evening.

He'd overdone his workout that morning and had suffered through a cramp because he hadn't stretched out enough. Jasper was vaguely aware that he was pushing his body harder than strictly necessary in a quest to occupy his mind and exhaust his body, and he heard the warning signal loud and clear. Emmett had only reinforced that when he'd helped him stretch out of the cramp, effectively ending both of their workouts.

Jasper was still limping slightly when he reached the cafeteria, but the ibuprofen he'd taken when he'd gotten back to his room was starting to work. He still had the sample of valium from the back injury if needed. Hopefully he'd make it through the day without any trouble. Knowing he didn't have a lot of time, he grabbed a bowl of cereal and a banana, and poured a cup of coffee into a paper cup to take with him to class. He needed to get to the grocery store again in case he ran into too many more late mornings.

The girls were getting ready to leave when Jasper slid into a chair at the regular table. Emmett apparently hadn't made it, which just made Jasper feel guilty. If he'd been able to handle things better, he wouldn't have t push his body so hard and Emmett wouldn't…

"Stop it," Bella said quietly next to him. She sat back down while Jasper started shoveling cereal into his mouth in an effort to eat quickly.

He shot her a look, enough of a gentleman to not question her with his mouth full.

"Whatever you're thinking, stop," she clarified. She looked tired; her hair was pulled back in a messy ponytail, and she'd dressed more casually than he'd ever seen her on a Friday in an academy polo over a thermal shirt with jeans and trainers.

Jasper swallowed. "It's not quite that easy, sweetheart." He swore sometimes he was raised in the wrong religion the way he so easily shouldered guilt. "Did Emmett make it to breakfast?" He asked, spooning up another mouthful of cereal.

"Mmhm," Bella said with a nod. "He flew in and out with an egg sammich."

Jasper felt mildly better at that. He glanced up at the clock on the wall and winced. "You should go," he said, mentally cursing. "You're going to be late."

"So are you, and we're going to the same place. My class will wait," Bella said off hand. "Slow down or you'll choke," she scolded mildly.

Jasper spluttered and she giggled. "Yes, dear," he said after he'd swallowed. He took another few bites and decided he was done. He could eat the banana on the way. "Ready?"

Bella nodded and rose with him. Jasper deposited his bowl in the dish area and pulled the banana from his coat pocket as they emerged into the morning drizzle. Bella tugged her beanie down over her ears and wrapped her scarf more securely around her neck. Jasper did his best to walk close so they could share body heat, but his hands were full and he was still moving awkwardly. Besides, he thought with a shiver, he was probably colder than she was. He needed to look into getting a better coat if he was going to stay in Forks long term. His trench coat wasn't doing a very good job of keeping off the chill.

Jasper made it to class with a minute to spare, though he hadn't bothered shedding his coat when he'd ducked into the office for his materials. It turned out that was a good thing, though, as the heater in his classroom seemed to be on the fritz. He called in to maintenance, but it appeared to be a widespread problem, and he was low on the list, since he'd been late getting in.

The temperature seemed to have dropped again by the time Jasper left the building for lunch. Rumors of snow were starting to spread through the student body. He groaned thinking about it. He cut his lunch short and went back to his room for the hoodie Edward had left behind so he could take his coat off in class.

Maintenance came around during the afternoon and finally got the heat back on, to his and his students' great relief. When he got back to his office at the end of his last class, he found a text from Emmett on his phone asking him to pack an overnight kit before coming to dinner. Apparently, they were going somewhere, and Jasper realized that Emmett wasn't going to take no for an answer when he reread the message. That, and he figured that it couldn't be anything worse than spending another Friday night in his room, moping about missing Edward.

Which is how he found himself at the Cullen house a couple of hours later, watching Emmett surrender his car keys to his mother.

"If you're going to drink, you're leaving your keys with me and you're spending the night," Esme said, her tone brokering no argument.

"Yes, Ma," Emmett said with an eye roll, handing over his keys.

"Hi, Esme," Jasper greeted her with a kiss to her cheek. "Thanks for letting us invade."

"It's no trouble, dear," she assured him. "I'd rather have you boys here and safe anyway. Just make yourselves at home. Carlisle and I will be around." She gave him a fond smile and wandered out of the room, Emmett's keys in her hand.

"Alright," Emmett said, dropping his bag on the floor near the couch. "The girls are having some bonding time, now that they all live in the same building, so I figured it was time for us to have a sit down. Beer?"

"Sure," Jasper answered, settling in one of the armchairs. He toed off his shoes and got comfortable, leaving his bag on the floor next to the chair. Jasper pulled his phone from his pocket, expecting Edward to call at some point during the night.

Emmett returned with four bottles of beer in one hand and a huge bowl in his other. "Mom made snack mix," he said, setting the bowl down between them and then handing Jasper a beer once he'd popped the cap off. "And I think there's fresh cookies hiding somewhere."

Jasper smirked as he accepted the offering. The Cullen boys and their sweets.

Emmett took a long pull off his bottle after he'd sprawled out on the couch. "So," he started after a beat. "Wanna tell me what's got you pushing your body harder than you need to?"

Jasper sighed softly. He should have expected that. "I'm having trouble sleeping," he admitted, picking at the label on his bottle before taking a swig. "The exercise makes me tired enough to get a couple of solid hours."

"You know you're risking a serious injury if you keep that up," Emmett cautioned. "And not just because of the way you hurt your back. How often are you hitting the gym?"

"Twice a day, but I'm not running all the time," Jasper said, defending himself. "Sometimes I swim, or do a weight training circuit. I'm trying to be careful."

"Are you going alone?" Emmett asked.

"Mmhm," Jasper hummed around a mouthful of beer.

"Dude, you know that's not safe, if you're as tired as you look." Emmett looked about as serious as Jasper had ever seen him, when not talking about Rosalie. "What's up, man?" Emmett asked, setting his feet on top of the coffee table. "This has got to be something more than just missing Edward. If it was that simple, you two'd just be trying to find ways to hook up at night during the week so the weekends would be easier. Not running yourself into exhaustion like there's a demon on your tail."

Jasper drained his beer and reached for a second and the opener Emmett had left on the table. He studied the bottle for a moment before looking at Emmett. "Have you ever thought you were so sure about something, only to have that fundamental knowledge completely fall out from underneath you?"

Emmett looked pensive for a moment as he sipped his beer. "I don't know, man," he said slowly. "I'd say maybe when I was forced to retire from playing football, but I think I always knew that I wouldn't be playing forever, and I had a backup plan in place. But I think you're talking about something else?"

Jasper nodded slowly.

"It's why you've been distant this past week, isn't it?" Emmett continued. "Talk to me, man," he said in a lower voice. "Is it you and Edward? Has something happened?"

"No," Jasper answered with a shake of his head. "Well, it's us, and…fuck," he muttered. "I'm kind of having a crisis of self identity," he said finally.

"What kind of crisis?" Emmett asked.

Jasper sighed. "My concept of my sexual identity is all kinds of fucked up right now," he explained.

Emmett finished his beer. "I'm gonna need more alcohol for this, I think," he said, rising. "I'll be right back."

Jasper nodded and took a long drink, trying to get his thoughts in order enough to talk with Emmett.

His lover's brother returned after a moment with six beers between his fingers. He set them up on the table and then pulled a couple bottles of water from the pockets of his jeans.

"Let me ask you something," Jasper started. "Did you ever experiment with your sexuality, or have you just always known you were straight?"

Emmett flopped back down on the couch with a fresh beer. "This stays between us," he said, gesturing with the bottle.

Jasper nodded.

"I never did anything like Edward," Emmett explained. "I'm straight, and I pretty much always knew that. But I had this buddy when I was a freshman, sophomore in high school, something like that. We were on the football team, and a few times…well, we gave each other a hand, if you read me. There wasn't anything to it. I mean, we weren't attracted to each other or anything like that. It was just something convenient."

Jasper nodded again. He'd seen similar things in the locker room from the track and swim teams. "Yeah, I know what you're saying," he answered.

"Where's this coming from, Jas?" Emmett asked, reaching for the bowl of munchies.

Jasper sighed again and finished his second beer. He set the empty bottle on the table next to the first. "I think maybe that I'm attracted to Bella."

"Whoa, dude," Emmett said, holding up his hand. "Let me ask you this first. Do I need to kick your ass for hurting my little brother? Cause no matter how much I like you, I totally will."

Jasper had to smile, though he didn't really feel it. "No. Edward and I are talking about this."

"Thank fuck," Emmett muttered, taking a long pull from his bottle. "So what's the big deal? Bella's cute. If I'd met her before Rosalie, I'd have probably hooked up with her."

"Yeah, well, you haven't always been a gay man, either," Jasper pointed out dryly. He reached for another drink. He popped the cap off and rolled it across his knuckles. "I'm confused. I've always thought that you find one person in life, and for as long as I've thought about it, that person has always been male. I found Edward, and for the first time in my life, everything felt right. And now this thing with Bella has me reconsidering everything I thought I knew about myself. Is it really possible to love, really love, more than one person? Part of me says yes, the rest of me is telling me that I have to make a choice, that I can't have them both. That I don't deserve them both. And at the root of it is whether or not I actually want to have that kind of relationship with Bella. She's a beautiful woman, and I do love her dearly, but how much of this has been missing Edward and how much of it is really my desire for her? I mean, she kissed me, so I think she maybe wants it, but is she just rebounding from James, or just interested in something she can't have?" He paused to breathe; apparently he'd forgotten that alcohol made him verbose.

"Slow down, Jas," Emmett said. "I can't even _begin_ to try to untangle all of that mess," he commented. "So let me start where I can try to answer. Who's to say that love has to be between only two people?" he asked, raising his bottle in salute. "I'll admit, society dictates that each person has their 'one true love,'" he said, making quotes with his index fingers, the others of his right hand curled around his beer bottle. "But since when has society at large known what's best for everyone? Society is what gave us slavery and segregation, and mass panic about flu, and stampedes at the Wal-Mart on Black Friday. But I think you probably get that, right?"

Jasper nodded. He kind of liked this quasi-philosophical side of Emmett.

"So who says you only have to love one person. I get what you're asking," Emmett continued. "You want to know about a romantic relationship with them both, which yeah, okay, isn't really conventional, but who says it's impossible? I remember from a class I took in college that humans aren't really geared to be monogamous. It goes against nature to settle down with only one mate, when the desire of the species is to find the best compatible mate to produce offspring with the highest chance for survival. Sure, this is the 21st century, but those instincts aren't gone, man," Emmett said.

Jasper took a long drink from his beer, getting the feeling for what it would feel like to sit in one of Emmett's classes.

"Maybe this is just your subconscious' way of seeking out the two best mates for you," Emmett continued. "Of course, we could rule that out because you can Edward obviously can't procreate, but he's still your mate. It's possible that something in your body has triggered to Bella as the mother of your children, and that's where your attraction to her is coming from," he finished with a shrug. "But does it matter? What matters is what you want to do about it. Do you want to see where things could go with Bella?"

Jasper shrugged. "Maybe. I don't know. I think so. But I don't know if I'm doing it for me, or for Bella, or even if it's because Edward seems interested."

"Man, sometimes you just gotta be selfish and think about yourself," Emmett advised. "You said Bella kissed you, so maybe she's interested. Edward…yeah, my little bro's a bit of a freak, but he loves you and he wouldn't do anything to hurt you or Bells. Sounds like the three of you need to sit down and talk a few things out."

Jasper slumped down in his chair, finishing his beer. "Yeah. I gotta sort some things out with Bella first, and I hope when Edward has a free weekend we'll get a chance to talk."

"Good. And by the way, you totally deserve to be loved, Jasper. Everyone does," Emmett said, setting his empty bottle near the other one on the table. "So stop hiding from us, alright? You're allowed to mope on Fridays when Edward leaves, but I'm laying down a moratorium on your weekday mopiness. No more. We also gotta talk about this running yourself into the ground thing," Emmett said. "It's not healthy."

"And this is?" Jasper waved his empty bottle at Emmett before setting it with its mates.

"Yes, every so often," Emmett retorted. "Look, I get that you're stressed and anxious and need to sleep. So we'll keep up our regimen in the mornings, but maybe you should talk to Rose about the yoga class she does a few times a week."

"I'm s'posed to be doing meditation with Edward," Jasper responded.

"Yeah, but the yoga will be good for your body, too," Emmett clarified. "Talk to Rose. At least it's a group setting, and you might like it. That way I don't have to worry about you drowning, or getting a cramp and hitting your head on the treadmill, or dropping a weight on yourself without a spotter." Emmett handed him another beer. "Just talk to her, okay?"

"Alright," Jasper promised. His phone rang on the table. Jasper picked it up and looked at the display. Edward. "Ye-ah?" he answered with a smile. Despite having eaten a good sized dinner, he was well on his way to buzzed after only three beers.

"Hey, baby," Edward said, laughing softly.

They chatted for a few minutes, Esme coming in to check on them while Jasper was on the phone. After he hung up with Edward, Jasper found that Emmett had set up a game for them to play (apparently they were done with serious talk). Several hours, many more beers, and a raid on the kitchen later, Jasper was stumbling his way upstairs to Edward's bedroom where he passed out across the bed, fully clothed. It had been far too long since he'd had more than a couple of drinks, and if he hadn't been drunk, he'd have known he was going to regret it in the morning.

Jasper woke late Saturday morning with a pounding headache. The room was dark, so someone had apparently come in at some point and pulled the curtains closed. He groaned as he sat up, cradling his head in his hands. After a moment he dragged himself into the bathroom and started running a hot shower. While the water heated, Jasper found a bottle of painkillers in the medicine cabinet and took two with a palmful of water from the sink. By the time he'd finished his shower his headache had receded and he was feeling marginally more human.

He followed the smell of coffee downstairs and was greeted by a smiling Esme and Carlisle, and an Emmett who looked a bit worse for wear. "Good morning, Jasper. Coffee?" Esme offered.

"Please," he answered, taking a seat next to Emmett. Esme set a cup of black coffee and plate of food down in front of him. Jasper took in the eggs, sausage, toast and fruit and looked up at her.

"Carlisle and I were known to party it up in our younger days," she confided with a wink.

Jasper and Carlisle laughed softly while Emmett groaned. "Thanks, Esme."

"Shh, too loud," Emmett whispered.

Jasper shook his head and started at the breakfast Esme had made for him while Carlisle chided his son.

"Jasper, sweetheart, what would you like for supper tonight?" Esme asked, pausing in her clearing up.

"What? How come he gets to pick?" Emmett asked with a pout.

"Because I say it's his turn, that's why," Esme said.

"But-"

"Emmett, has Jasper ever gotten to pick what we have for Saturday dinner?" Esme asked.

"No," Emmett grumped.

"Alright, then stop acting your shoe size and start acting your age, and maybe I'll make chocolate cake for dessert. Though maybe Jasper would prefer fresh fruit. It'd be better for us, after all," she said thoughtfully while Emmett spluttered at the thought of not getting a 'real' dessert.

Jasper laughed quietly. "Chocolate cake would be a wonderful treat, Esme, thank you. Uhm –" he thought for a minute. "Would potato soup be any trouble?"

"Not at all," Esme assured him. "Actually, that sounds really good. It's supposed to be another very chilly day today, so I think a pot of soup would be just what we'll need tonight." She patted him on the shoulder. "Maybe I'll pick up some good bread and we can have turkey melts to go with it," she said half to herself as she wandered away.

"Ow," Jasper said as he was kicked under the table. "What was that for?" he shot a look at Emmett.

"Stop kissing up to my mom, man," Emmett complained. "No wonder she likes you better than Edward and I."

Carlisle laughed as he rose from the table. "Because you and Edward are both spoiled mama's boys," he teased.

"Yeah, old man? Who is so completely whipped he's going to be sent out in that mess," Emmett said, pointing through the windows to the patio, "to go do all her grocery shopping?"

Carlisle grinned. "Not whipped. Just very well loved."

"Ew, Dad," Emmett said, making a face while Jasper laughed.

"Good thing you passed out last night, huh?" Carlisle continued on his way out.

"Oh, I'm gonna be sick," Emmett groaned.

"Good for you, man," Jasper called to Carlisle's retreating back.

"Dude, that's my _mom_," Emmett complained.

"And your dad, so what's your point?" Jasper asked, finishing his breakfast.

"I need to bleach my brain," Emmett whimpered.

"How do you think you and Edward got here?" Jasper couldn't resist teasing his friend.

"Immaculate conception," Emmett spat.

Jasper laughed as he rose, gathering his dirty dishes. "Keep tellin' yourself that, bro," he said with a wink. As he left the room, Emmett was muttering "wrong wrong wrong," to himself. Jasper was still laughing when he dropped his dishes in the sink behind where Esme was writing out her shopping list.

"Is there anything I can have Carlisle pick up for you at the store, Jasper?" Esme offered.

"No, thanks," Jasper said. "I've already planned to make a grocery run tomorrow."

"Okay," she said with a smile.

Jasper refilled his coffee cup from the carafe on the counter and thanked Esme again before he returned upstairs to Edward's room. He'd brought some school work with him in his overnight bag, planning on just spending the day at the Cullens since he'd be back over for dinner. He settled on the couch with his six stacks of homework and the red pen that had been in his Christmas stocking and slowly started grading. His headache faded as the caffeine and food were absorbed into his system, and he got lost in the work and the mellow playlist of Edward's piano music on his iPod.

He looked up some time later when he heard a tap on the door and someone calling his name. Bella was standing in the door way, two mugs in her hand. "Can I come in?" she asked when Jasper had pulled the earbuds from his ears.

"Sure, darlin'. What's up?" He asked, clearing a space next to him on the couch so she could sit.

She handed him a mug before she sat. Jasper inhaled the scent of coffee as she folded herself down. After a moment she shifted a bit closer, and Jasper lifted his arm so she could tuck herself against him. "Are we okay, Jas?"

"Of course we are, Bells," he said softly. "Why wouldn't we be?"

Bella fidgeted with her mug of tea. "Last weekend was pretty awkward."

Jasper huffed a humorless laugh. "Yeah, it was," he agreed. "I'm not upset about it, you know? I – you just confused me."

She sighed softly. "I know. Edward and I talked and…"

"And what?" Jasper prompted.

"I don't want things to get weird," she said quietly.

"Does this feel weird?" He asked, giving her a hug with the arm he'd draped over her shoulders.

"No, it feels comfortable. Right," she whispered.

"See?" Jasper said lightly. "We're okay. I like being able to be affectionate with you, Bells. I like that we can have that kind of relationship," he confessed. "I don't know that I want it to be anything more, not just yet, so you'll have to give me some time to get things straight in my head." He paused. "Pun not intended."

She smiled slightly.

"Hey," he said, waiting until she looked up at him. "I know what it's like to be starved for human contact. You need a cuddle, you can come to me, okay? None of this has to change until we're ready. If we're ready. If we want it to. If it feels weird, say the word and we'll fix it, okay?"

"What about Edward?" she asked quietly. The hint of anxiety was gone from her deep brown eyes, but that something else he'd seen the previous weekend was still there.

"You can cuddle with Edward too, sweetheart," Jasper assured her, knowing he wouldn't mind at all.

"No, I mean, what about you and Edward?" Bella clarified. "Are you two okay?"

Ah. Jasper smiled and kissed the top of her head lightly. "We're fine, Bells."

"He's really not mad that I kissed you?"

"He's really not," Jasper promised. "He probably wishes he'd been there to watch, actually."

That coaxed a real smile from her. He still didn't really have a solid feel for what she wanted, but he knew that was a conversation that needed all three of them, and so would have to wait until Edward had a free weekend. Jasper also knew that whatever happened, Bella needed to be in control over her decisions and have the freedom to choose and express what she wanted. He wouldn't control her the way James had.

"So this is okay?" she asked softly, shifting her cup to her left hand and winding her right around Jasper's waist, laying her head against his shoulder.

"This is absolutely okay," he replied. "We should do something next weekend, just you and me," he said.

Bella nodded. "That'd be nice. What are you thinking?"

"Maybe we could just do lunch or something on Saturday? Maybe drive up to Port Angeles and see what happens?" he suggested.

She nodded and yawned. He gave her arm a light squeeze and reached for the stack of papers he'd shifted to the arm of the couch when she'd joined him. "Tired?" he asked.

"Mmhm," she replied, shifting slightly and curling her legs up underneath her. "I haven't been sleeping well this week."

"I know the feeling, sweetheart. I apparently make a pretty darn good pillow," he teased, thinking about how Edward had sought him out for sleep that first weekend. "I'll wake you for dinner." He easily lifted the mug of tea from her hand.

"Thanks, Jazzy," she murmured.

"You're welcome, Bells," he said softly. He went back to his grading as her breathing deepened and evened out, and she snuggled a bit closer into his side. She mumbled a bit, nothing Jasper could make out, but then went quiet. Jasper pulled the blanket from the back of the couch down over her. He graded for another half hour or so until his own eyes began to feel heavy and he set everything aside and let his head fall back onto the couch.

"Hey, man."

Jasper woke at Emmett's quiet voice. "Hey," he responded, rolling his head and rotating his shoulders to try to loosen the tension. He glanced down at his side and Bella was still tucked up against him, her hair falling over her face.

"Got things worked out?" Emmett asked. He looked less worn than he had at breakfast, and Jasper guessed he'd probably spent the morning nursing his hangover until he was in a better mood.

"Started to, anyway," Jasper confirmed. "What's up?"

"Mom sent me up to get you two. Dinner's in about an hour," he explained. "You got Bells?"

Jasper nodded. "Thanks. We'll be down in a bit."

"I'll let mom know. Oh, and Rosie and I are going out after dinner," Emmett said from the door.

"I'll get Bella or Alice to give me a ride back," Jasper answered.

"Cool," Emmett responded, and headed back down stairs.

Jasper gave Bella a few more minutes before he began to wake her. He lifted her hair away from her face and tucked it behind her ear and then gave her shoulder a gentle shake while he called her name softly.

Bella stirred slowly, shifting under the blanket before she blinked her eyes open and peered blearily up at Jasper.

"Welcome back, sleeping beauty," Jasper said quietly.

"Hmph," Bella grumped.

Jasper chuckled softly and kissed her forehead. "Hey, it was me or Emmett waking you up. I thought I was going easy on you," he teased, coaxing a sleepy smile from her as she sat up.

"Thanks," Bella said dryly. She ran her fingers through her hair and gathered and twisted it up into a complex looking knot at the back of her head. When she held it there, Jasper guessed what she needed and handed over his pen, watching, somewhat fascinated, as she used it to secure the chestnut colored mass in place. "Is it dinner time?"

"Just about," Jasper answered. "Hungry?"

"A bit," Bella said.

Jasper rose and offered Bella a hand, and they went downstairs together, finding the rest of the family gathered at the table. Jasper carried in the soup, while Esme followed behind him with a plate of sandwiches. There were already small bowls of shredded cheese, bacon, green onions and sour cream on the table for everyone to doctor their soup to their liking. Everyone served themselves, and conversation picked up as they began eating.

Alice talked about a show she had coming up. She was hosting it, using her professional name, but several of her students were participating. It had been taking up a lot of her time, but she seemed excited and happy about the chance to showcase some of her students' works.

Rosalie didn't have anything professional upcoming, which was good, Jasper suspected, because she was well into wedding planning. He had to admit to tuning out some of that conversation, and Bella must've noticed because he was kicked in the shin under the table a couple of times.

Jasper really didn't have anything to share, but let everyone know that the intramural team was going alright and that he was making the arrangements for the visiting scholar who was coming in late April.

They kept going around the table until conversation dissolved into more general topics and the last of the soup and sandwiches were eaten up. True to her word, Esme had made a two layer chocolate cake and confided in Jasper that she'd hidden a slice for him to take back to campus for Edward, when he returned the next day.

Emmett and Rosalie left not long after dinner ended, anxious to get on with their date night. Jasper collected his bag and papers and got a ride back to campus with Bella.

He ended up in her half of the suite she shared with Alice, watching movies and helping her to finish unpacking. He carried empty boxes down to the dumpster when he left to return to his room for the night. They had agreed that, after the previous weekends' weirdness it was best not to risk a repeat. Jasper wasn't ready to strain their friendship (or whatever they were calling their relationship now) to get a solid nights' sleep. Besides, he justified his decision, Edward would be home the next afternoon.

It wasn't that late when Jasper got back to his room (and he realized that unlike his previous posts, he'd never thought of his dorm at Forks Academy as home) and he settled down with his laptop and sent Edward an email. Jasper grabbed a book and stretched out on his bed, pausing in his reading to respond when his computer chimed an email alert.

He and Edward chatted over email throughout the evening, until Edward said his goodnights, having an early morning to get the kids back on the bus. Jasper spent the remainder of the night trying to sleep and largely failing. He did take Emmett's advice, though, and not go to the gym to run or otherwise work out the frustration of not being able to rest. Instead he listened to music and read a bit, putting aside the schoolwork that taunted him from the table, trying to focus on just himself for awhile.

However, with the dawn, that attitude changed. After a shower and coffee, Jasper occupied his Sunday much like the previous one, with errands and school work. He tried to ignore his phone and pretend to not glance at the clock every fifteen minutes, but he was well aware of the time for most of the day. Edward had expected to be home around 5 in the evening, and while in his car, Jasper had heard the weather forecast predicting snow. He hoped the band would beat the incoming storm to Forks; mostly for completely selfish reasons.

"You used to have way more discipline than this, Whitlock," Jasper cursed himself quietly when he caught himself looking at his phone display for the umpteenth time. He tossed the thing onto his bed, out of reach, and turned to the shelf behind him to turn his alarm clock away. Distractions out of sight for the moment, Jasper managed to get his focus back on his reading (the new History club book) and discussion questions he was putting together, and was startled out of his concentration by a knock at the door.

"It's open!" he called, finishing a sentence on his notepad. He looked up with the door opened and smiled to see Edward, hair still damp, closing the door behind him. "Hey, you."

"Hey, yourself," Edward responded, moving further into the room. He approached Jasper at the table and kissed him softly.

"Mm. Welcome home," Jasper said quietly against his lips. "I missed you."

"I know," Edward answered cockily. Jasper laughed softly and rested his cheek against Edward's stomach as Edward combed through his hair gently. "Have you been sleeping?" he asked, his thumb shifting to caress over the skin under Jasper's eyes.

"A bit," he admitted. "Though I'm not sure passing out on Friday night completely qualifies." He looked up into Edward's face. "You look like you're managing better, too." Edward looked rested, and Jasper felt only a bit guilty that he was making Edward worry so much about him. He was also a bit envious at Edward's ability to make the transition better.

"Keeping up with 20 teenagers will wear you out," Edward remarked dryly, though he smiled. He kissed Jasper again softly and then let him go, backing up the few steps to sit on the edge of the bed.

"How was the trip?" Jasper asked, marking his page and closing the book before turning to face Edward, propping his feet up on the bed next to him.

"Good overall," Edward said, curling a hand around Jasper's ankle, making small circles with his thumb. "The kids had a good time, and it was a great experience for them. They're a bit disappointed in not winning, but they'll get over it fast enough. They've got another competition in three weeks, so we'll be working hard until then."

"You're not taking both bands next weekend?" Jasper asked, frowning. He thought the all-state weekend was for all the students.

"Uh-uh," Edward said with a shake of his head. "The Wind Ensemble is performing at the conference, but there was only one member of the jazz band that made it to All-State that's not in the wind ensemble, so she gets to tag along," Edward explained. "There were six members of the Wind Ensemble that made All-State, so they're going to have a long weekend, but it'll be nice for their classmates to be there to support them for the All-State concert."

"Ah, okay," Jasper said with a nod. He'd thought all the bands were going down to perform. "When do you think you'll be back on Sunday?" he asked. He'd only just realized that the next weekend was Valentine's Day, and he hoped to be able to pull something together for them for when Edward got home.

"I'm not sure yet," Edward said with a shrug. "I'll need to check the itinerary and see if there's anything planned for Sunday. It might be pretty late."

"Okay," Jasper responded, trying not to feel disappointed that once again their jobs were going to wreak havoc on their chances to spend romantic time together.

"I'll let you know tomorrow," Edward said, and Jasper nodded. "Why is your clock backward?" Edward asked out of the blue.

Jasper felt his ears heat up slightly in embarrassment. "I was getting distracted watching the time," he admitted.

Edward laughed quietly and gave Jasper's ankle a squeeze. "Come on," he said, beginning to rise. "We should get a move on to make it to dinner."

Jasper nodded and rose, tugging Edward to him when they were both standing. He slid his hand around Edward's neck up into the hair at the base of his skull as he drew Edward close for a deep kiss. Their tongues slid against one another and Jasper scraped his teeth along Edward's bottom lip as he broke the kiss. "I've missed being able to do that whenever I want," Jasper breathed.

"Me too, love," Edward agreed softly. They remained standing close for several long moments until a knock at the adjoining door interrupted their silent exchange.

"Yeah?" Jasper called quietly, not moving from Edward's embrace.

Emmett poked his head around the door. "Oh, hey, bro, didn't realize you were back. Just wanted to see if you were ready to head to dinner, Jasper, but it looks like you're good."

"We're just leaving," Jasper answered. He and Edward stepped apart, but Jasper kept a hold of Edward's hand as they stepped into the hall and waited for Emmett to join them.

They chatted idly on their way across campus. It had gotten cold again, and Jasper wrapped his new coat around him a bit tighter to ward off the chill. He was beginning to think he wasn't suited for colder climates; he hadn't remembered it being so cold in Colorado. But Edward tugged him a bit closer as they walked. "No wonder all the women in your life are trying to fatten you up," Edward remarked dryly. "At least you finally got a better fucking coat."

Jasper laughed softly and nodded. "Is it always this cold in the winter?"

"Naw, this is weird," Emmett responded as they reached the cafeteria. "We get a lot of rain, but it doesn't usually get cold enough to ice and snow, like they're talking about for later this week."

"Ugh," Jasper remarked with a shudder. "I hope 'they' are wrong," he quipped. The dining hall was well heated, and by the time they had gotten their food, Jasper was comfortable enough to take his coat off and drape it over the back of the chair he took between Edward and Bella. Bella's greeting smile seemed much more genuine than others Jasper had received throughout the week, and he could only attribute that to the fact that they'd talked and gotten things sorted between them.

Conversation over dinner was casual, mostly a rehash of the previous evening's summation of everyone's weeks for Edward's benefit. They paused in their talk for the Dean's address, and then continued after over coffee and dessert. It seemed like they hardly got to see each other anymore, with Jasper's extra-curricular activities, Edward's increase in responsibilities, Alice show prep, and Bella putting together the writer's symposium. Emmett and Rosalie were putting the wedding plans together in their spare time, so it was nice to linger with his friends and family and catch up.

After dinner, Jasper and Edward went back to Jasper's room long enough for him to pack a small overnight bag, and they ventured back into the cold to go to Edward's room for the night. Like the previous Sunday, they curled up together and talked until Jasper dozed off, warm and secure in Edward's embrace. He slept solidly throughout the night and when Jasper woke to Edward's alarm on Monday morning, he felt truly rested for the first time in a week.

Jasper easily wrapped his arms around Edward when he shifted to lie on top of Jasper after switching off the alarm. "We have an hour and a half," Edward said softly, rubbing his nose lightly over Jasper's throat and collarbone. "Because I really don't want to go to the gym."

Jasper smiled moved one of his hands from Edward's back to his chin, tipping his face up so Jasper could kiss him. "I like the way you think."

Clothes were divested quickly, and though the bed was small, they made easy work of getting close. Soon they were breathing heavily and the touches they exchanged were more urgent and needy.

"You do realize," Edward said breathlessly. "That it's been like two weeks since we've had sex."

"Yes, I'd noticed," Jasper responded dryly, though his breath was short as well. It was by far not his longest dry spell, but Jasper's body craved Edward's stronger than anything else he'd ever known. "You wanna talk about it, or do something about it?" he asked with a bit of snark in his voice, though the light nip to Edward's collarbone was teasing.

"Do something, please," Edward said, rocking his hips against Jasper's.

"As you wish," Jasper whispered. He made love to Edward like his life depended on it, like there was no time constraint, like they weren't sharing a bed that was too small in the middle of a dormitory full of young boys.

Though as it turned out, they had time for a round two before the real world beckoned.

Jasper pulled his sleep clothes back on and jogged his way across campus to his dorm to shower and dress for the day. He met back up with Edward at the dining hall, grateful that they'd woken with the alarm set for their regular gym meeting to they'd have a chance to eat.

Alice gave them a knowing look when they slid into their chairs. "Another good workout, boys?" she teased.

Jasper just winked at her.

Sometime between lunch and dinner, Valentine's decorations began to go up in the dining hall, Jasper noticed. When he returned to his building, he was happy to see it free of red and pink (being the boys' dorm, of course), but there were fliers up about the various fund-raisers for the holiday. The first through fourth years grouped together to do a cookie-gram delivery. The 5th years were doing a candy-gram, the 6th a flower gram, and someone in the 7th year representation had gotten bold enough to secure volunteers to do singing telegrams. Everything would be delivered either on Friday, Saturday, or Sunday, to class or dorm.

The whole thing just kind of made Jasper depressed, and ruined the high he'd been carrying for most of the day after getting the chance (however rushed) to be intimate with Edward. He'd never been one to celebrate Valentine's before; even with Darryl, his one other long-term relationship, it just hadn't worked for them, two teenage boys. But he felt different with Edward. There was a real chance for Jasper to do something romantic for Edward, and as cheesy as it sounded to do it on the holiday, Jasper felt like doing something slightly clichéd. But his plans evaporated when Edward told Jasper that he wouldn't be back with the bands until well after the campus dinner, due to some event or other on Sunday morning, and it was another seven hour or so drive to Yakima.

Jasper felt his mood darken as the week progressed. He made up excuses to not eat with the group so he could avoid the dining hall, even though it hurt to give up his one guaranteed time per day with Edward. It was silly, and he knew it, to get himself so worked up about a holiday created by the greeting card companies, but he had hoped that they'd be able to spend the weekend together. So, despite Emmett's moratorium on moping, by Thursday, Jasper was securely in a funk, and he'd effectively cut himself off from everyone so that no one noticed. He'd even called and cancelled his appointment with his therapist, despite knowing that it really would have been better for him to have gone.

Thursday night, a half hour or so after he'd have returned to his room from the history club meeting (if he'd gone), Edward showed up with a bag on his shoulder.

"Hey," Jasper said, holding the door open.

"Hey?" Edward asked, an eyebrow raised. "I've hardly seen you all week and that's all you've got?" He came through the door, and Jasper closed it behind him.

"I'm sorry," Jasper said honestly. "It's just been a rough week." He took Edward's bag and set it by the closet, drawing the other man close for a long embrace. For the first time since Monday Jasper felt his spirits lift.

"I've noticed," Edward said softly, his mouth against Jasper temple as they stood in their hug in the middle of Jasper's room. "Are you okay? I've been worried about you."

"Yeah, I'll be alright," Jasper assured him. "It's nothing to worry about tonight," Jasper said. "I just want to be with you before you leave tomorrow."

"Hm, I like that plan," Edward said quietly. He kissed Jasper and it morphed into something long and languid, and they began their quiet evening of soaking up as much of each other's presence as possible.

Jasper spent the night trying to give as much of his attention as he could to Edward, though he was pretty sure that Edward could tell something was still bothering him. To his credit, Edward didn't say anything, and they just spent the evening pressed as tightly together as possible. Their need for each other was almost palpable in the room as they clung to each other, not many words exchanged after awhile. It was becoming quite obvious to Jasper that they needed to find some time to reconnect and soon, before he managed to ruin everything.

Edward fell asleep first, his head tucked under Jasper's chin, fingers spread as always over Jasper's chest, just above his heart. Jasper tried to stay awake and watch Edward, but the exhaustion of the week over took him and he was easily lulled to sleep by Edward's deep even breathing.

When Jasper woke to his alarm Friday morning, he found the bed empty, but there was a note sitting on what looked to be a book on the table. Jasper switched off his alarm clock and reached for the note.

_Jas, I'm not sure what's been wrong with you this week, but I hope you can get it worked out, soon. I've missed you the last couple weeks, especially this week when you've been so distant. Please take care of yourself, baby. I hate seeing you like this when I can't do anything to help, because I have to leave you again for the weekend. I love you, and I'll see you on Sunday._

Under the note was a signed first edition of Izzy Higginbotham's first novel.

Jasper felt like complete shit. Edward had needed him to be there during the week before he had to go off on his own with thirty-odd teenagers again, and Jasper had been so focused on his own issues that he hadn't supported his partner, emotionally or physically, when he'd needed to. He sat on the edge of the bed, hands dangling between his thighs with his head bowed, the book sitting discarded next to him. Instead of going to breakfast, he grabbed a granola bar from his stash and didn't leave his room until a few minutes before he needed to be in class in an effort to figure out how he was going to make things better. He owed Edward a massive apology for his behavior, and he couldn't just fix things to appease his own guilt.

He spent the day avoiding everyone. Instead of going back to the office between classes, he just remained in his classroom. His students didn't seem to notice that anything was wrong, but Jasper felt like he couldn't concentrate on anything other than his swirling thoughts. But the day passed, if somewhat more slowly than Jasper had hoped, and he successfully managed to avoid to speaking with anyone other than his students for the day. His appetite was gone, so he went back to his room at the end of the day and kept the lights shut off and doors locked. His phone rang a few times, but he didn't answer it. Emmett knocked on the adjoining door, but Jasper ignored him. He could hear Bella calling for him through his door, but he didn't get up from his bed to answer her, either, even though she deserved better. Eventually, he just put his pillow over his head after he stretched out on his bed and closed his eyes, desperately hoping for sleep to carry him away.

Jasper woke Saturday morning feeling like he was hung over, despite not having the pleasant experience of getting drunk. He knew it was somewhat of an emotional hangover; it wasn't the first time he'd had one. Usually it happened after he spent too much time in crowds. His body ached as he climbed out of bed and went for the kettle in the kitchenette. There were messages scrawled on his board in Emmett, Rosalie, and Bella's handwritings, and he read them as he waited for the water to heat up so he could make a much needed cup of coffee.

Emmett's handwriting was huge across the top of the board. _You're being an idiot again. I'm here if you wanna go beat the shit out of the punching bag in the gym_

_We're worried about you, Jasper. Please let us know you're alright._ Rosalie's script was neat and tiny compared to Emmett's.

_I'll be here at 10 am. You promised me a date, and I'm holding you to your word. I don't care what your problem is._ Bella's message was to the point and despite not feeling it, Jasper managed a half smile.

Once the water was hot, Jasper made his cup of coffee and went back into his room, closing the door behind him. He wasn't quite ready to deal with anyone yet, and he just knew that if Emmett knew he was awake, he'd be over. He checked his email and wasn't surprised to find nothing new from Edward. Jasper needed to find a way to put things right between them.

After he'd finished his coffee, Jasper glanced at the clock; he had time to go for a run before Bella'd be over to drag his ass over the coals for being an idiot again. He changed quickly, remembering to grab a hoodie, and jogged over to the gym. The building was empty and quiet, which was pretty usual for a Saturday morning. Jasper grabbed a towel, stretched, and started running.

Jasper ran for just over an hour, which was somewhere around eight miles, given the easier pace he'd been trying to take to keep from aggravating his back injury and complying with Emmett's advice. He made sure to cool down when he was finished, stretching again.

Back in his room, Jasper showered and dressed in jeans, a button down shirt and a sweater. Bella had made their reservations for lunch, so he opted for semi-casual. Just as he was tugging on his trainers, there was a knock on his door. He walked over to open it, having locked up when he came back and went to shower.

"You're being an idiot," Bella said by way of greeting, her voice quiet and a worried expression on her face softening the words.

"Yes, ma'am," he responded quietly.

"Glad you understand the situation. Come on, you're going to buy me lunch and tell me what's going on," she said with a soft smile. "You're driving, but we're taking my car."

"Okay," Jasper agreed. He grabbed his new coat from where it was hanging on the corner of the closet. After he made sure he had his wallet and keys, Jasper locked the door and let Bella take his arm as they left the building. "Wow," he breathed. The sky was darker than when he'd left for the gym, and it had gotten even colder. "Should we be going out in this? It looks like it'll snow."

"I've got chains and I can drive in the snow," Bella answered. "And we're going. I need off this campus and some good Italian food, and you need to start talking," she said, brokering absolutely no argument. "But for now," she said, handing over the keys. "Let's get on the road."

"Can we stop for coffee?" Jasper asked

"Sure," Bella said with a shrug.

They made a quick stop at Starbuck's before Jasper steered them onto the highway toward Port Angles. Bella clutched at her hot chocolate while Jasper's latte with an extra shot rested in the drink holder so he could drive. They drove for a few minutes before Bella reached over and turned down the stereo and angled herself toward Jasper.

"Alright, Jasper, spill," she said authoritatively. "What's up with you lately? Why have you shut everyone out this week?"

Jasper sighed. "Valentine's day," he answered quietly.

"All this is just because Edward's going to be out of town tomorrow?" Bella asked more gently.

"Partly. It's also partly because he didn't even seem to realize what day it was when I asked when he was going to be home tomorrow," he explained. "I mean – it's not nearly as important as supporting the students, so I can see how he may have missed it, but it still hurt a little bit to know that he's not going to get home until late and we're not going to have a chance to do anything. So it's just been a hard week, not only having to deal with one more weekend without Edward around, but to have to be surrounded by everyone getting more and more into the spirit of the romantic holiday was just…really fucking depressing." Christ that sounded stupid having to admit out loud, but it was how he felt.

"And last night?" Bella prodded.

"I was upset because of the way I'd been acting," he confessed. "Edward deserved better before he went out of town. He left me a really sweet gift yesterday morning with a note that made me feel like a complete ass. And since I was already pissed at myself, I figured it was best to just hide and keep from lashing out at anyone else, 'cause even though y'all mean well, sometimes it's all just a bit much."

Bella nodded. "So, you're pissed at Edward but acting passive aggressive about it, and pissed at yourself for behaving that way?"

Jasper barked a humorless laugh. "Yeah, you can say that."

Bella was quiet for a moment before she spoke again. "Jasper, you know Edward loves you. Yeah, it's nice to have that recognized somehow, but why does it have to be on a day proscribed by greeting card and chocolate companies? Isn't it enough that you know that right now, stuck with thirty teenagers, he's probably thinking about you, wondering if you're alright, and wishing he could be here instead of there? Why does it have to be Valentine's Day to be special or romantic?"

Jasper sighed. "It doesn't. I just…I wanted to do the clichéd day, y'know?" he explained. "Most of it couldn't have happened, but we could have skipped the campus dinner and gone to see a movie, and then to the diner for dinner and pie, since we haven't been since before New Year's, and it's kind of like our place. Just, something for us, off campus together. We haven't had a date night since the semester started, and I know that's my fault for not just doing it as much as it is his and Dr. Anderson's for him being gone," Jasper finished with a sigh. "I really thought I could handle this arrangement, but we're both so busy during the week that we haven't been able to steal the time I thought we could."

"You're handling it better than I think I would," Bella said quietly. "Seriously, Jas," she said when he made a disbelieving noise. "I'd be a hot mess."

"I feel like a hot mess," Jasper answered with another sigh. "Everything's just coming down all at once and I feel like I might split apart from all the directions I feel like things are going," he explained.

"Jasper, sweetheart, I love you. Edward loves you. This, whatever it is between us," she said with a wave of her hand "we'll get figured out. I know it's brought up a lot of questions for you, and that it's useless for me to tell you to not be anxious over it because we'll get it worked out, but you don't have to deal with any of this on your own. You seemed so much happier the first part of last week, after you talked with Emmett, and after we cleared things up a bit. Even though things are confusing, I'm here for you, Jasper. You can talk to me. You've done so much for me in the, what, six months that we've known each other? Let me do something for you, even if it's just listening."

Jasper smiled and reached over to take her hand, giving it a squeeze. "I'll try."

"Alright, try by telling me how you're going to apologize to Edward for being an ass this week," she directed. She made no move to pull her hand away, and Jasper didn't let her go.

He laughed quietly and outlined what he had in mind. Jasper figured simple was best, and Bella seemed to approve.

Snow was beginning to fall lightly as Jasper pulled into the parking lot of the restaurant Bella had booked for lunch. It was the place they'd eaten on their way home from Black Friday, and Jasper smiled to have remembered that. He parked at an available space away from the entrance and escorted Bella into the restaurant.

The food was great, and the conversation was mostly light, though there were a few moments where Bella had to drag Jasper back to the present from his wandering thoughts.

Jasper paid the bill, as promised, and after helping Bella into her coat, led her outside.

"Hold up a second, Bells," Jasper called, stooping over to tie his shoe when they emerged from the restaurant. The roads were beginning to ice over, and he didn't want to trip on his laces and slip on the ice.

Bella laughed and went easily down the stairs to the sidewalk below the restaurant, turning in a slow circle with her palms facing the sky as she caught snowflakes on her gloves.

Jasper grinned and shook his head at her childlike glee at the experience, before glancing back down at his laces. Just as he completed the knot, he heard the squealing of brakes and the sound of an engine.

He looked up to see a minivan careening toward them. Bella seemed frozen in place, her eyes wide. Jasper jumped down the four steps and snagged her roughly around the waist, pulling her tight up against him as he turned and tucked and rolled away from the vehicle. He grunted as he landed hard on his shoulder, curled protectively around Bella's smaller body; his had taken the brunt of the force of their landing. Jasper heard the grinding crash as the van collided with the porch of the restaurant, the sound and then shower of broken glass falling over them, as car alarms sounded around them from the impact.

Jasper lay still for a moment. He was on his back, cold and damp seeping through his coat, but Bella was still tucked up tight against his chest, shaking. "Bells, you hurt?"

"N-no, I d-don't think so," she stuttered. "You?"

"Not sure yet," he answered honestly, adrenaline still flooding his system making him not feel much of anything. He began to hear shouts from people and sirens in the distance. "No, don't move yet, sweetheart," Jasper said as Bella began to shift in an effort to move. "Paramedics are on the way, and I want to make sure you didn't hit your head when we hit the ground, okay? Plus, you're warm," he said lightly.

She nodded tightly and didn't move.

"Hey, you two alright?" Someone called out to them. "We've got help coming."

"I think we're okay," Jasper called back. "But we'll wait for the EMTs." Jasper's back was beginning to throb, as was his shoulder, the pain creeping up into his neck. He'd probably dislocated it again.

Bella was still shaking, and Jasper tightened his arms around her as much as he could while he whispered quietly that they were fine, that everything was going to be okay. The EMTs arrived a few minutes later. They extricated Bella from Jasper's grasp and despite her protests, slipped a collar on her and strapped her to a backboard before getting her out between vehicles.

Jasper was next, and he didn't fight the medics as they loaded him up. "So, witnesses said you jumped out and saved that girl?"

He would have nodded, but the neck brace they'd put on him restricted his movements. "We were on a date," he answered. "I stopped to tie my shoe and she was playing in the snow when I heard the van coming. I just reacted."

"Good instincts, man," the other medic said.

Jasper smiled a bit. "Yeah, I guess."

It was fortunately an otherwise slow day in Port Angeles, and it didn't take long for Jasper to be seen by someone in the emergency department. He hadn't actually dislocated his shoulder again, but he'd been assured by the doctor that he'd have some spectacular bruising. The doctor gave Jasper a couple of pills for pain to get him through the afternoon and said the best thing would be a long soak in a bath or hot tub. Jasper and Bella were both released after being given a quick once over, and they called a cab to get them back to the restaurant so they could get Bella's car and make the drive back to Forks.

"I called Esme and Carlisle," Bella said as they waited for the cab. "Just so they'd know we're going to be late."

"Thanks, darlin'," Jasper answered. "You okay?"

"Yup, clean bill of health," she responded. "You?"

He nodded. "Gonna have some pretty bruises, but doc said I was fine."

"Good. Thank you, Jasper."

"For what, sweetheart?" Jasper asked.

"You saved my life. Again," she answered.

"Oh, that," Jasper said lightly, tugging her into a hug. "That was nothing."

She smacked his arm. "I'm serious. Thank you." She stood up on tiptoes and kissed him softly on the mouth.

"I'd never forgive myself if I let something happen to you, Bella," Jasper answered softly.

The cab pulled up and Jasper guided Bella to slide in before him. They gave him the name of the restaurant and Bella snugged herself up against Jasper's side for the short ride. Jasper paid the driver when they arrived back at the restaurant parking lot. Thankfully, the scene had been cleared and both Bella and Jasper had given their statements at the hospital. Since Bella's car was parked away from the building and was not part of the scene, they were allowed to leave.

"Should I drive?" Bella asked as they approached her car. She hadn't let go of his hand since they'd gotten into the cab, and Jasper didn't really want her to.

"If you don't mind, yeah," Jasper answered. Despite the pills the doctor had given him, he was beginning to hurt. "You may be better experienced to drive on these roads than I am," he explained.

"Okay," she answered with a nod. She finally let him go as they got into the car. Bella cranked the heater up to high; Jasper had been carrying his coat since it was soaked and useless.

"Did you tell Esme and Carlisle why we were going to be late?" Jasper asked.

Bella nodded, concentrating on the road.

"So Esme's going to be all worried?"

"Mmhm," Bella said with a nod.

"Okay. Just so I know what I'm getting into," he said.

Bella laughed quietly and spared him a look. The snow had mostly stopped falling while they were in the emergency room, but the roads still looked slick. So Jasper settled back to let Bella concentrate with the stereo playing quietly. He dozed off after a bit, tired from the week, the adrenaline let down from the accident, and the conversation he'd had with Bella before and through lunch. At one point, he thought he felt her fingers in his hair, but he passed it off as a fleeting fancy.

He woke just as they cruised past the 'Welcome to Forks' sign.

"Hey," Bella said. "Feeling okay?"

"Yeah, just a bit sore. Drive wasn't too bad with me conked out, was it?" Jasper asked.

"Nope. You just missed my badly off-key humming to the radio," she teased.

"Damn. Sorry I missed that," he responded.

Bella grinned and she navigated through town to the Cullen home. There were small evidences of snow throughout town, and when they reached the house, the lawn was dusted white, though the walkways had been cleared.

It took Jasper a moment to get out of the car; the hour and a half trip had caused him to stiffen up. "Come on, old man," Bella teased as she offered her arm for him to lean on as he climbed out of her Mini. "Maybe this will teach you to stop taking flying leaps off of porches in front of careening mini vans sliding on icy streets."

"Hey," he protested as he closed the car door behind him. Bella giggled and led him toward the house.

Esme greeted them at the door. She folded Bella into a careful hug first, then handed her off to Carlisle when he entered the room. Then she turned her attention to Jasper.

"I'm not sure if you've got a hero complex, or no sense of survival instincts, Jasper Dale Whitlock," she chastised him before pulling him into a hug as well. "But thank God you were there. You're alright?"

"I'll be bruised, but I got checked out at the hospital and I'm fine," he explained.

"Okay. Do you need anything?" She asked.

"Nope." Jasper kissed Esme on the cheek. "But I need to send a quick e-mail. Do I have a few minutes before dinner? I know we were late."

"Of course, Jasper," she assured him. "Is everything alright?"

"I hope so," he answered quietly with a small smile.

She nodded thoughtfully and let him go. Jasper took the stairs two at a time and borrowed the computer in Edward's room. A quick search gave him the link he needed, and he typed out a vomit of words into the email, and sent it to Edward before he could change his mind. Taking a deep breath, Jasper collected himself, and went back downstairs to spend the evening with his family, and to apologize to the rest of them.

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Okay faithful readers. There's no preview in review replies this week, but there will be two short chapters posted next week instead. Does that make up for it? ~_^ I hope you'll still hit that button and tell me what you think, though. :D


	39. Chapter 38: Turn Me On

**thanks as always to the ever fantastic Naelany and wishingforlove.**

Please follow Jasper's directions here if you can. Follow the link to youtube to get the full experience for this chapter (and maybe it won't seem like such a cheap shot at less than 600 words), or it's embedded on the blog (link on profile)

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Edward checked his email when he returned to the hotel on Saturday evening. The performance at the conference had been a success that morning, and Edward was still riding the high of the great show that the All-State bands had put on, and the comments he had received throughout the day on their performance. He was unsurprised when his mood shifted slightly when he saw the waiting message from Jasper. When he'd left Forks on Friday morning, something hadn't seemed right; Jasper had been withdrawn all week, but wouldn't talk to Edward about it.

Still, even if they were going through a rough patch (which was expected, really, given Edward's physical absence and Jasper's habit of emotionally distancing himself when things got difficult), Jasper was his partner, and Edward didn't feel right ignoring the email.

He clicked on the message and turned away for a minute to strip out of the shirt and tie he'd been wearing all day and slipped into a Forks Academy hoodie before settling back on the bed.

_Edward-_

_Play this link first - _www(dot)youtube(dot) com(/)watch?v=mHff55AeEAQ

_Okay, is it playing? Okay… I need you to just listen to the lyrics for a moment._

Edward sat back and let the music play. It was a bluesy song, with an easy piano melody and rhythm section underneath. He closed his eyes and listened.

By the time the song ended, Edward was feeling a bit better about where things stood with him and Jasper, and he opened his eyes and focused on the words on the screen.

_So, that song pretty much conveys everything I'm feeling right now, except for the huge apology I owe you for acting like an ass this week. I'm sorry I shut you out, Edward. I miss you and I love you and I want nothing more than for you to come home so we can spend some time together. I was just…really disappointed that you're not going to be home this weekend, and with everyone around me appearing to be getting into the spirit of the holiday, it put me into a really dark mood. I'm sorry that I locked myself away instead of just talking to you about it, but there wasn't anything for us to do about it, really. Especially since it didn't seem that you'd realized it was even Valentine's Day, and we both had work to do._

_Anyway, I told your mom I'd make this quick; Bella and I are already late for dinner. I love you, with everything that I am, Edward. I'll be waiting for you when you get home tomorrow night, no matter what time it is. _

_Happy Valentine's Day, baby._

Edward smiled. He'd been worried that he wouldn't be able to pull off his surprise for Jasper, but it looked like it was going to go off perfectly. He sent Bella a quick text confirming the plan was on. It felt awkward asking her to help him plan something romantic for Jasper, but she'd assured him it was fine. What she didn't know was that Edward had included her as well, more than she probably expected, taking the first step to seeing what it was that was developing between the three of them.

He replied to Jasper's email with one of his own, then shut his computer down before checking on his students. They were hitting the road early in the morning so they could be back in Forks by early afternoon. Edward wasn't the only one with plans for Valentine's Day.

* * *

Turn Me On was written and performed by Norah Jones

Look for another chapter on Thursday.


	40. Chapter 39: Fell in Love with a Boy

**Welcome back to the Garden, lovelies! I promise a nice big chapter on Tuesday, mkay? :D**

**Thanks as always to Naelany and wishingforlove.**

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"Alice?" Bella knocked on the door to Alice's half of the suite. They'd hardly kept the doors closed between them since she had moved in, but Bella respected the boundaries Alice set up when she needed them. "I'm going to take a bath; I just wanted to see if you needed the bathroom first." Her body ached in the aftermath of her near miss with the minivan earlier that afternoon, and she thought she'd take the doctor's advice of a long soak to ease her muscles.

"I'm good, Bells. I'm just about done here. Want to crack a bottle of wine and watch a movie?" Alice called back.

"Sure," Bella answered. "I'll be out in a bit."

"I'll bring you a glass when I get mine."

Bella smiled and tapped the door as she turned to duck into the bathroom. She started the hot water and added a bit of bath salts from the shelf under the window. While the water ran, she tied her hair up into a bun to keep it from getting wet. With a book and a tightly folded towel, Bella slipped into the hot water with a pleased sigh, relaxing while the tub continued to fill. Just before it was in danger of overflowing, Bella used her toes to turn the taps off. In the quiet of the room she exhaled slowly and slid just a bit deeper into the bath.

She had heard from Edward earlier in the evening and had put their plans in motion. She had felt bad, hiding Edward's plan from Jasper earlier that day, when he'd been so clearly miserable over the whole thing in the car. But she'd known going in it would be worth it to help Edward deceive Jasper.

There were three things that Bella had grown to realize since New Year's, and her weekly appointments with Dr. Stevens (who she'd been seeing since just after Halloween, but other than Carlisle and Esme, no one knew about her Saturday appointments). First, she knew that Jasper and Edward were madly in love with each other. Second, she knew that, on some level, one or both of them wanted to sleep with her. Lastly, Bella Swan knew positively and absolutely that she was irrevocably in love with both of them, and it was breaking her heart.

Helping Edward with setting up his plans had just rent her heart that much further in two, but she'd bit her lip and helped out, because they both deserved a happy ending after the week they'd had, and Bella could survive being left behind once again.

Dr. Stevens was trying to help her make sense of it all, her feelings for Jasper and Edward, and what she could do about them. She was encouraging Bella to sit down with Edward and Jasper discuss her feelings. Though Bella had voiced her concerns that her feelings would have a big negative impact on Jasper and Edward's relationship, Dr. Stevens had tried to assure her that there was no harm in talking. After the last couple of weekends, Bella wasn't convinced. As much as she wished things were different, she wouldn't risk them breaking up because of her. She knew that on some level it was irrational, but she'd blamed herself for the longest time for her parents' divorce; she wasn't about to get between her two best friends.

Over the course of the four or so months Bella'd been seeing Dr. Stevens, she was beginning to understand where some of her issues stemmed from. Though Rose and Alice had been a big help, but she'd needed someone professional to talk to, to start sorting out her issues as to why she'd stayed with James, even after she'd begun to realize she was being abused.

A lot of it, Bella had come to understand, had come from the deaths of her parents when she was fairly young. Though she had legally been an adult when Charlie had died, she had still felt like she'd been abandoned in a way. Dr. Stevens had, in the time that Bella had been seeing her, started to help Bella realize that. Even though the Cullens had become her new family, James had still fulfilled a part of her that the Cullens couldn't, and that's why she'd endured the abuse. A part of her had felt that she'd deserved it, and another part had been so desperate to keep someone she'd thought she'd loved in her life.

And she was the same way with Edward and Jasper. She was willing to sacrifice her romantic feelings to remain friends with them to keep them in her life. She considered it a small sacrifice after everything they'd done for her.

A knock at the door drew her out of her musings. "Yeah, Alice?"

Her tiny roommate slid into the room with two glasses of red wine. She handed one over to Bella and perched on the obvious seat in the room. Bella was long used to dressing in front of Alice and didn't blink at her presence.

"Damn, girl," Alice breathed. "Nice bruises."

Bella glanced down and saw the large purple spot on her left hip and the long finger-shaped stripes on her right. "Yeah. Doesn't hurt much, though." She knew it would in the morning.

"Is that where Jasper grabbed you?"

Bella nodded and took a sip of the wine. It was good; she didn't know anything about wine, but she knew what she liked and Alice took care of the rest. "And where he didn't quite cushion me enough when we hit the ground."

"Ouch," Alice murmured. "Can I get you anything?"

"Do we have any brownie mix?" Bella asked.

"I'll see what I can do. How much longer will you be? I'll get a movie picked out."

Bella held up a hand for inspection. "I'm not quite pruney yet, but the water's getting cold. Just a few more minutes, I think."

Alice slid from the stool. "Alright. Meet you in mine in ten minutes. Will you let me do your hair?"

Bella laughed. Sharing a suite with Alice had led to more slumber party like nights than Bella had expected, but they'd been good for her soul, too. It was a great distraction when things got a bit heavy in her head. "Sure, Alice."

Alice clapped her hands and kissed Bella's forehead before dancing out of the room and closing the door behind her.

Bella sighed softly and sipped at her wine, letting her thoughts resume their twisted path. She knew that Edward and Jasper loved her, and there'd been a time when she'd known absolutely that Edward wanted her. All she knew at that moment was that she was in love with them both and had no idea what to do other than step back and let things proceed as naturally as possible. She'd had her heart broken plenty of times before; it could last once more, she was sure.

She wasn't sure what had possessed her to kiss Jasper that day. He'd been convenient, sure, but even then she'd known he wasn't truly available to her that way. Jasper and Bella had always been affectionate towards each other, and on her part, it was because Jasper seemed safe. He wouldn't want her, she knew, whereas with Edward, there was still an underpinning of sexual attraction between them, so she was less open to being physically demonstrative with him. She didn't want to lead him toward anything. So Jasper had seemed like a safe option; she'd needed physical comfort, and he'd been there. But Edward had surprised her with his revelations about his and Jasper's conversation before New Year's; despite Jasper's sexuality, she hadn't expected him to be so open minded about being willing to –well – open their relationship, and to Bella of all people.

Since they'd talked, she'd been a bit more free with her physical affection with Jasper, when he was around. The previous week had made that difficult, because he'd gone to ground in his funk over Edward's supposed obliviousness about the romantic holiday looming on the horizon. But she'd still done what she could, including being as open and honest with him as possible on the ride to Port Angeles for their date earlier that day.

And when she'd kissed him again, after he'd saved her life _again_, she'd meant it, and he hadn't shied away from her. In fact, he said he'd never forgive himself if anything happened to her that he could prevent. He'd meant it, too. So she hadn't let go of his hand in the car, and when he'd whimpered quietly in his sleep, she'd ran her fingers through his hair and he'd calmed, making her smile. She'd decided then that if Jasper (or Edward) never loved her more than a very close friend, she could be satisfied with that, so long as they remained in her life the way they were.

She only hoped that when Bella revealed her "secret identity" to Jasper in a few weeks that things would stay the same. She was nervous about it, but at the same time, looking forward to the joke. She already had a colleague ready to introduce her to the crowd so she could make an appearance . She knew it would probably make him wonder why she wasn't announcing Izzy, but she knew the look on his face would be worth it. Edward, she knew, was already anticipating Jasper's reaction. She only hoped he'd forgive her later, and that she'd still be able to give her talk as one of the keynote speakers of the day-long conference.

Bella had put an incredible amount of work into the conference yet again. It was the third year that the academy had asked her to put on the writer's event, and she was glad to be able to do it in both of her professional capacities. There was quite a bit of creative talent in the student body at the school, and bringing other notable authors (since most of the students already knew who she was) helped give them exposure to a field that was still mostly mystical to them, and confidence to continue to explore their own writing. As the only creative writing instructor on campus, Bella did what she could, but some of her students needed more exposure than she alone could give. Plus, she was able to reach out to some up and coming local (i.e. Northwest) writers. The whole conference was definitely worth all the work she put into it, though she knew she was going to want to lock herself away for the weekend after to recharge her internal batteries after having to face so many people intent on heaping praise on her for her work.

Though maybe, she thought, she'd have a couple of bodyguards on her side if she asked nicely enough.

After another moment Bella climbed out of the tub, feeling a bit less tension and ache in her body as she pulled on her robe and padded back to her room. She dressed in flannel pj bottoms and a tank top, gathered her brush and hair ties, and made her way into Alice's room for girl time.

* * *

Inspiration for the title of this chapter from Joss Stone's "Fell in Love with a Boy" which is a cover of the White Stripes "Fell in Love with a Girl," which is on the playlist for Jasper. :D I should probably put that playlist on the blog at some point...Anyway, there's a live video embedded on the blog, but if you search at youtube, the first two vids that come up will be the actual music video.

I know that these were a couple of short chapters, but I needed to address a couple things from Bella's POV before we move forward. Now we know where everyone stands. There's a lot of feelings going on, and I promise that in a couple chapters, we'll start getting everyone sorted. ~_^ Have an awesome weekend and I'll be back on Tuesday with another full length chapter.


	41. Chapter 40: Valentine's Day

**thank you, as always, to the lovely Naelany and wishingforlove for continuing to beta and putting up with my craziness. :D  
**

* * *

Jasper was already awake and dressed when someone knocked on his door early Sunday morning. He'd had Bella stop at the store on their way back to campus after dinner and he'd grabbed an over the counter pain reliever plus sleep aid, which had helped him fall asleep, but he was still awake earlier than he'd wanted to be. He wasn't expecting anyone, knowing Bella liked to sleep in and Edward was out of town. He opened the door to a female student that he didn't know. "Yes?"

"I have a delivery for you, Dr. Whitlock," she said, handing over a cellophane wrapped heart shaped cookie, tied with a white ribbon and a card taped to the packet. "Happy Valentine's."

"Thank you," Jasper said musingly, looking at the packet. He shut the door as the girl glanced at her list and scooted across the hall. He peeled the card from the wrapper and opened it.

_Happy Valentine's Day. A journey has been set before you. If you accept you must be at the location of the night of your greatest happiness by 9:30 am. You will find your next clue there. _

Jasper read the neatly printed card twice through. The hand writing wasn't Edward's or Bella's; they were the only two people he could think of that would involve him in something like that.

It took him a few minutes to decide where the clue would lead him. He gathered his keys, coat, and the cookie-gram and he headed for his car in the faculty lot. He shuffled a bit at first, still a little sore from the accident the day before. Jasper had been worried about re-aggravating his back injury from before the break, but it didn't seem to be giving him any trouble, and Carlisle said to call him if anything changed. So far he just felt like he'd taken a bad fall in hand-to-hand training, and moving his left shoulder was a bit painful, but nothing that anti-inflammatories wouldn't take care of.

Jasper pulled into the driveway at 8:57 am. He didn't bother locking the car, as he had a feeling he'd be on the move again.

Esme met him at the door and handed over a paper towel wrapped egg sandwich and another note. She smiled at him fondly and when she gestured, he stooped slightly so she could kiss his forehead.

"Thanks, Esme," Jasper said quietly. She waved him off with a wink and he returned to his car. He unfolded the note and saw that Edward hadn't bothered to disguise his handwriting.

_You have accepted this journey. The path you travel today shall remind you of my love for you, and the relationship we've built together. You must reach your next destination by 11:30. This was a night of many firsts for us - you wouldn't want to be late and miss anything exotic, would you?_

Jasper felt at once loved and full of guilt that he'd dismissed Edward so quickly. And that he hadn't tried to do anything of his own once he knew Edward was going to be out of town. Even hours away with more important things to do, Edward was looking after Jasper. Once again, he had the fleeting thought that he didn't deserve his partner. Glancing at the clock, Jasper saw he'd have plenty of time to get to Port Angeles, so he ate Esme's breakfast in the car while sitting in the driveway. After a stop at Starbucks, he was on the road.

He arrived at the aquarium with a few minutes to spare. He approached the ticket booth and waited his turn in line. When he reached the window, he gave his name, and the attendant nodded and excused herself. She came back a moment later with an envelope. "She's a lucky woman," she said with a grin, sliding the envelope through the pass.

"Yes, he is," Jasper answered with a wink, thanking her and stepping to one side. He slid his finger along the flap of the envelope and peered inside. There was a ticket for the 11:30 tour and another note.

_The journey for the one you seek began here in many ways. Remain faithful - you may find other things you seek along the way_.

Jasper smiled and added the note to the others in his back pocket and joined the queue for the 11:30 walking tour of the aquarium.

Jasper recalled their first date as he half-listened to the tour guide. He remembered the corners where they lingered, hands brushing in the dark. They'd still been dancing around each other even then. He'd learned a lot about Edward that night; although they'd been going out for a couple of weeks, that first date had revealed a bit about both of them. Jasper smiled as the tour continued, recalling how they'd talked about their mutual attraction over dinner and how Jasper had teased Edward about eating his salad. The exhibits were familiar as Jasper thought about his interest in them that first night, as well as the casual contact he'd shared with Edward as they had lingered behind the tour group.

At the end of the tour, a familiar figure was waiting for Jasper. Bella was dressed simply in a casual red dress and flats, her hair pinned back from her face, but long down her back. She smiled as he approached.

"First," she said quietly, handing Jasper another folded slip of paper.

_We have both sought this lady in different stages of our lives. Perhaps she is a part of our journey? If you desire, take her to the house of the goddess of coffee where you and I are both known to worship. Your journey is near an end - but where it stops and what awaits you remains your choice._

Jasper folded the note and placed it with the others in his pocket before reaching for Bella's hand. He pulled her close and kissed her softly. "Happy Valentine's Bells," he said quietly with a smile. "Can I take you to lunch?"

Bella's smile was brilliant and she nodded, letting Jasper lead her to his car after he draped his jacket over her shoulders, since it appeared she didn't have one.

"Is your car here?" Jasper asked as he started his car. He just wanted to know if he needed to bring her back.

"Nope," she answered, shaking her head. "Alice dropped me off."

"Okay." They fell quiet, the radio soft in the background against the noise of the road as Jasper headed back to Forks. "Did you help plan this?" He asked softly.

"Some," Bella replied, looking nervous. "I'm sorry I lied to you, but Edward wanted it to be a surprise, and-"

"It's alright, darlin'," Jasper assured her. "It was a good surprise. I'm just sad that he couldn't be here." He didn't expect Edward back until late that night since they weren't scheduled to leave Yakima until after 2 pm when a workshop ended. "But I'm more than happy to have you with me."

She smiled softly and took his hand. "Me too, Jas."

They chatted quietly and remained hand in hand for most of the drive. Jasper steered them toward the diner.

Maggie guided them to a table with another note placed in the middle addressed to Jasper. "What can I get you two to drink?" she asked as she set the menus on the table.

"Hot tea, please, with honey?" Bella asked.

"Sure thing. For you hon?" Maggie turned to Jasper.

"Coffee. And a glass of water?"

Maggie nodded. "I'll be back in a couple."

He thanked her then opened the note.

_Happy Valentine's Day, love. The goddess will bring your final instructions after your meal. I love you._

Jasper pocketed the note like the others and turned his attention to Bella. "How are you feeling?" he asked.

She smiled and shrugged. "A bit sore, but I took a hot bath last night and that helped. I've just got a few bruises."

"Bruises?" He didn't think he'd let her hit the ground.

"On my hips," she answered, sipping at the hot tea that Maggie had brought her. "Nothing major, though, and they don't hurt much."

"I'm sorry, sweetheart," he said quietly, taking her hand across the table.

"What for?" Bella asked, twining their fingers together.

He liked that they were back to casual affection again, that thing seemed to be normal and progressing between them. "I thought I had a better hold on you than that."

"You're seriously going to beat yourself up over a few bruises?" Bella looked at him skeptically. "Hell, Jasper, you jumped in front of an out of control car and pulled me out of the way. I'll take a couple of bruises over the alternative."

"But-"

"Jasper?"

"What?"

"Shut up," Bella said with a smile. "Neither of us were seriously hurt, and that's what's important, right?"

He nodded.

"Okay. So don't worry about it," she ordered with a soft smile, giving his hand a squeeze.

Maggie came back to the table. "What can I get you kids?"

Jasper deferred to Bella.

"What's your soup today?" Bella asked Maggie.

"Chicken Noodle."

"Perfect," Bella answered with a grin. "Can I get a bowl, please?"

"And you, young man?" Maggie asked Jasper. "Like I need to ask."

"Cheeseburger with onion rings," he responded with a wink.

"You got it." Maggie scooped up their menus and walked away.

Jasper gave Bella's hand a squeeze and let her go so he could curl his hands around his coffee cup. "How're things on the James front?" he asked.

"No new sightings," Bella answered with a shrug. "He's being indicted next week on the assault and attempted rape charges," she said, making a face. "But they've tacked on the most recent DUI charge. The DA expects the charges to stick, and it'll depend on timing for when the trial will be. You and Edward will probably be called to testify," she explained.

"No problem, darlin'," Jasper answered. "You know I'll be there." He knew the only reason he hadn't gotten slapped with an assault charge of his own was because there was no way James would have been able to make it stick without admitting to hitting Bella.

"Yeah, I know. I wish you didn't have to," she said quietly.

"Bella?"

"Yeah?"

"Shut up," Jasper said with a grin, turning her words back on her. "It's done, okay? I'll do what I need to do to make sure he goes to jail and can't hurt anyone else for a long time."

"Thanks, Jazzy," she said, ducking her head slightly, a light blush creeping over her cheeks.

He just smiled and nodded, taking a sip of his coffee. He heard a quiet 'thunk' on the floor and glanced down when he felt something brush against his thigh. Little toes wiggled at him in greeting and he glanced over at Bella.

"What?" she asked innocently, slouching down a bit. "I'm comfortable."

Jasper laughed quietly, shaking his head. "Aren't your feet cold?"

She shrugged. "Alice put me in uncomfortable shoes. I'll take a bit of cold over squished toes."

"Girls," Jasper muttered under his breath and was rewarded with an aborted kick to his hip. He bit back a hiss of pain; her foot had connected with one of the tender spots on his body from landing on the ground the day before.

Thankfully, Maggie chose that moment to deliver their food, and Bella's feet returned to her side of the booth as she pouted slightly.

"Tell you what," Jasper said after thanking Maggie. "I'll keep your feet warm some other time we're not in public, okay?"

That seemed to clear up her (probably fake) pout, and Bella dove into her soup with enthusiasm. They chatted lightly through the meal. Edward hadn't been wrong, and the diner had absolutely the best burgers Jasper had found, and he looked the other way when Bella snagged not only the pickle from his plate, but also nearly half the onion rings.

"Tab's been settled," Maggie reported when Jasper asked for the check. "But I'm 'sposed to give you this," she said with a wink, making Bella giggle.

_One last task awaits you. We have shared many firsts. Some have been more significant than others. If the lady is with you, please bring her to the place where the question was first asked. There you may find the answers you seek._

"Ready to go, sweetheart?" he asked Bella softly.

She nodded and graced him with another brilliant smile. They left the diner hand in hand and Jasper swallowed nervously as he drove to the grocery store where that fateful conversation had taken place in the parking lot.

Edward was waiting, two roses in his hand as he leaned up against his car.

Jasper pulled into an adjacent spot and helped Bella from the car. It was only a few steps to where Edward waited, and Bella held Jasper's hand the whole way. Edward's smile just seemed to soften as they approached.

* * *

The bus had gotten them home by 1 pm as Edward had originally planned. It gave him enough time to get showered and changed, and to the grocery store parking lot with a few minutes to calm himself down. Though he'd planned everything, he still wasn't sure this last part was a great idea, but knew it was worth a try.

Edward grabbed the two single roses from his passenger seat and slid from the car, leaning against it hoping the casual stance would mask his anxiety.

He only had to wait a few moments. Jasper's car parked near him, and his smile softened as Jasper escorted Bella to his side. The sight of them together, comfortable and happy made Edward happy.

"Hello," he greeted them softly. He handed them each a flower and kissed them softly before he turned to Jasper. "You have completed this journey, but there is one question that lays before you. Both of you," Edward said, looking to Bella as well. He took both of their hands and led them to the trunk of the car.

He popped the trunk with the fob to show the three duffel bags he (and Alice) had assembled. "I've got a hotel room for tonight," he explained quietly. "I'd like it if you both would join me."

Bella responded first. She gave Edward's hand a squeeze. "Not yet," she said softly with a smile. "I think you two need time first. And we need to talk."

"Okay," Edward answered, hoping his disappointment wasn't too obviously written on his face. Jasper nodded as well. He handed her his car keys before Bella reached for her bag in the trunk; she kissed them both, resting her hands on their chests, before she turned to Jasper's car. Edward shut the trunk and he and Jasper watched until she drove off.

Jasper tugged on Edward's hand and pulled him into a hug. "Thank you for today," he said quietly, his breath stirring Edward's hair. "It was a wonderful surprise. I'm sorry that I doubted you."

"You didn't have any reason not to," Edward said, just as quietly. "Will you come with me?" he asked, unsure about where they stood at that moment.

"I'd follow you wherever I could, Edward," Jasper responded. He kissed Edward sweetly, and Edward knew he'd done okay, both with the surprise, and by including Bella, even if she'd taken herself out.

Edward returned the kiss, and they broke apart to slide into the car. Edward turned the heat up and drove the short distance to the hotel where he'd booked the room. He got them checked in and the desk clerk assured Edward that everything had been set up as he'd asked.

Edward had ordered dinner from a local steakhouse, since they didn't get steak very often. When they arrived at their room with their bags, Edward found that the staff had gone beyond what he'd asked for. The table had been set with basic china and candles over a linen tablecloth. Dinner wouldn't be delivered for a few more hours (and there would be leftovers, since he had planned for Bella to join them). Thoughts of dinner were pushed out of Edward's head as Jasper eased Edward's bag from his shoulder and dropped it to the floor before pushing Edward lightly against the door and kissing him. Edward only wanted to protest for a moment; it was _his_ turn do to the seducing. But Jasper's kisses drove any thought of protest from Edward's mind.

"I've missed you so fucking much," Jasper said softly, his voice thick. "We see each other every fuckin' day, but I miss you so much it hurts," he said, his breath warm against Edward's ear as he spoke.

"I know, baby," Edward said, feeling the same tightness in his throat. "But I'm home next weekend and I've only got one more trip after that," he said for them both. They both needed the reassurance. "We just have to get through the next four and a half days and then we can have a whole weekend. We can stay at the house, or go up to Port Angeles. Just us. Maybe Bella," he added.

"Bella," Jasper answered with a nod, his nose skimming Edward's neck.

"Are you sure, babe?" Edward asked. "If you think you want something to make me, or her, happy..."

"I'm sure. I - she feels like a missing piece of a puzzle. Like she just fits, Edward. I can't explain it," Jasper said softly. "With you I feel whole, but with you both it just feels - right. Complete. She has something I think we both need, and don't you go getting all crass on me now, Edward Anthony Cullen," Jasper threatened, though Edward felt the smile against his skin that told him Jasper's thoughts had gone in somewhat the same direction.

"I know what you mean," Edward said, turning to nuzzle his face into Jasper's neck. "I've had that feeling too. We'll ask her if she wants to spend next weekend, or part of it, with us." He knew she'd probably need to spend part of the weekend working, since her conference was three weeks away.

"Okay," Jasper breathed, and Edward felt him relax fractionally in his arms. Jasper finally took a small step back, letting Edward move from where he'd been pressed up against the door.

Edward bent to pick up his cane and he guided Jasper over to the bed. "I'm glad you came with me," Edward quietly. "I have plans for you tonight.'

"I guessed that," Jasper said with a smirk. "How'd we get out of the campus dinner?"

Edward smiled. "It was canceled because of the holiday," Edward admitted. "I maybe possibly pulled some strings to keep you from getting the campus wide email reminder. The Dean wanted to spend the evening with his wife, and he knew a lot of the faculty probably felt the same, so it's optional tonight."

"Remind me to never get on your bad side," Jasper teased. "You've apparently been taking lessons from Emmett."

Edward smiled and kissed him softly. "Naw. This was all me. And a bit of Bella."

"Thank you for including her," Jasper said with a smile. "And I'm glad you're home early. How was the trip?"

Edward stepped between Jasper's legs and leaned down, brushing his lips across Jasper's ear. "I don't want to talk about that right now," he said, scraping his teeth against Jasper's earlobe.

Jasper's hands curled around Edward's hips in response. "What do you want?" he asked in a low voice.

"I think I'd better just show you," Edward answered. He took a small step back and pressed a hand to the center of Jasper's chest, pushing him back onto the bed. "Stay there. I'll be right back. Wait," he said as he turned back. "Strip, and lie down on your back."

"Okay," Jasper responded, sitting up and beginning to strip out of his tops as Edward turned to collect his bag and duck into the bathroom.

Edward had had a week to prepare, and though he'd ended up paying a bit extra for rush orders, he'd managed to get the few things he needed delivered to him, discreetly, in time. He and Jasper hadn't played much with toys, but Edward had a few ideas for things he wanted to try (though if Bella had stayed with them, he imagined things would have gone differently). He pulled a few items from his bag and set them on the counter before he stripped down, too, leaving his boxers in place.

When he emerged from the bathroom, Jasper was stretched out on his back, eyes heavy lidded, completely naked and completely unselfconscious about it. Edward knew he hadn't been sleeping well and was extremely tempted to just curl up with him and nap until their dinner arrived, but his libido (which reminded him that they only had _sixteen_ hours together) overrode his common sense. So he propped his cane up against the bureau, dropped his goodies on the bed, set his knees on the mattress, shifting so that his knees were on either side of Jasper's hips, just above his waist.

Jasper's eyes opened a bit more, his hands moving once more to Edward's hips, thumbs making lazy sweeps over his skin.

"Jasper?"

"Hm?"

"What the fuck is this?" Edward asked, his eyes drawn to the deep purple bruise along Jasper's shoulder and upper arm. He lightly traced his fingers over the mark, pulling his hand back quickly when Jasper hissed in pain. His eyes traced the familiar contours of Jasper's body and he took in the sight of bruises along his hips as well.

"A shoulder?" Jasper suggested.

"Jasper," Edward said in his best 'don't fuck with me' voice.

Jasper sighed quietly. "Bells and I went to lunch yesterday up in Port Angeles. It was snowing and the roads had started to ice over by the time we got to the restaurant. I stopped to tie my shoe on the way out and she was playing in the snow," he reported with a soft smile, obviously pleased with that memory. "A van came into the parking lot going too fast and skidded on the ice."

Edward had an idea where the story was going and he kissed Jasper's bare chest in apology as he continued.

"Bella had frozen at the bottom of the steps, so I grabbed her and threw us out of the way. The van crashed into the front of the building."

"You're both okay?" Edward asked softly.

Jasper nodded. "Just bumps and bruises. I didn't want to bother you with it last night since I knew you'd worry and you needed to focus on being with the band and supporting your kids. I thought you had that workshop this morning, too."

Edward kissed him softly and cupped Jasper's cheek in his palm. "That's why you were late for dinner last night?"

"Mm." Jasper said with a nod.

"Is your back okay?" Edward asked, smoothing his hands lightly down Jasper's sides.

"Because you care or because you want to get laid?" Jasper asked with a wink.

"Both?" Edward offered. "Okay, mostly I want to get laid."

Jasper laughed, the sound filling the room and making Edward feel warm and loved. "Well, maybe we can do something about that."

Edward chuckled. "Oh, believe me, I think we can." He leaned in and kissed Jasper, leaving enough space between their bare chests for his hands to wander over Jasper's. He felt Jasper's fingers curl around his hips and slide up his flanks, Jasper's blunt nails lightly scratching his skin.

"You have something in mind?" Jasper teased as Edward moved on to nip at his jaw.

"Mmhm," he hummed, shifting lower, feeling Jasper's arousal begin to rise under him as he ran his lips over Jasper's throat, wrapping his mouth and tongue around his Adam's apple and sucking, drawing away with a soft 'pop.' He grinned at the quiet moan that elicited from Jasper. "Definitely." He reached over Jasper's shoulder to where he'd dropped the stuff from his bag and dragged them down so Jasper could see.

Jasper's left hand slipped from Edward's body to run his fingers over the metallic colored rippled toy, lube, small vibrator, and handful of condoms Edward had dropped onto the bed. "For you, or me?" Jasper asked with a grin, turning his eyes back to Edward.

Edward shrugged one shoulder and returned the smile. "Either."

"Hm," Jasper said, his features taking on a serious look. "Then I think it ought to be you, since this was all your idea," he said.

Edward didn't have much time to react as Jasper surged into a sitting position and rolled them so Edward was on his back, laughing as he looked up into a smiling Jasper's dancing blue eyes. Jasper leaned down to kiss him deeply. Their tongues slid against each other as hands started to roam. Edward was careful as he skimmed his hands over Jasper's body, taking in the dark blemishes that marred his hips and thighs, careful not to apply any pressure to keep from causing Jasper any pain.

Despite their time apart, Jasper was still able to demonstrate his mastery over Edward's body as he coaxed and teased his body into a relaxed but aroused state. They laughed and teased each other as they refamiliarized themselves with each other's bodies, fueling their desire for each other as they exchanged kisses and touches, pinches and light smacks, nibbles and nips and nuzzles.

They ended up with Jasper perched between Edward's legs, the left of which was resting on Jasper's shoulder as he trailed his way up from Edward's knee toward his groin with his lips. While Jasper's left hand caressed Edward's knee, his right reached for the pile of goodies that Edward had brought out from his bag. He shifted his position slightly before moving Edward's right leg so it was drawn up toward Edward's body, but his foot was planted firmly on the bed. He'd have some control over his leverage that way, he thought, as he watched Jasper, letting his hands idly drift over Jasper's body.

Jasper looked at Edward with a wicked glint in his eye. He ran his long fingers teasingly over the rippled toy, and Edward bit his lower lip in response. Jasper just winked at him and reached for the lube. "Trust me, baby," Jasper said softly, reassuring Edward with soft pat to his thigh.

"I do," Edward acknowledged, watching as Jasper liberally coated the object with lube.

"Good," Jasper said with a bright smile. He leaned up and kissed Edward. "You wanna play instead?" He whispered against Edward's lips.

Edward shook his head as he felt the rippled toy press against him. It had warmed from Jasper's handling, so the lube wasn't quite a shock. "No," he breathed.

Jasper smiled and kissed him again as he eased the first knob of the plug into Edward. Jasper continued to tease and lavish Edward with attention; light kisses and nips to various erogenous zones on his body, butterfly kisses to his belly (which twitched in response to the feather light touch) as he slowly worked the toy deeper. Edward felt himself stretch and relax as each bead progressed into him. Jasper made sure he was completely relaxed after each insertion, that he wasn't hurt, and Edward found himself growing increasingly aroused under the attention and sensation. No part of his body was ignored.

He sighed softly when the toy was fully inside him. He felt stretched and full in a pleasant way, and then Jasper started teasing him with it, withdrawing and thrusting back in slowly, working the last (and biggest bead) on the toy in and out of him a few times, making Edward squirm in pleasure. "You're a fucking tease," he cursed without heat, warmed by Jasper's answering laughter.

"Yeah?" Jasper asked in a teasing voice. "Then you're going to fuckin' love this," he responded. Before Edward could say anything else, Jasper took his cock into his mouth while working the plug in and out of him one more time.

"Christ," Edward swore, his hips surging up. Jasper hummed and the vibrations traveled up his cock and through the rest of his body.

Jasper released him, placing a delicate kiss on the very tip of Edward's erection. He reached around out of Edward's sight, and the next thing he felt sent a jolting thrill up his spine. Jasper had set the small vibrator at the base of the plug and set it on the lowest setting.

"Holy," Edward breathed, his eyes rolling back into his head a bit.

"You're so fuckin' gorgeous," Jasper said, nuzzling Edward's stomach as he worked the vibrator through the plug. Edward felt a flush spread over his body as Jasper played with the settings on the vibrator and adjusted it, turning it so that it was pressed up against the flared end of the toy and up against the tender skin between his sack and ass, sending a whimper inducing wave of pleasure through him. "I just want to keep you like this sometimes," he said softly against Edward's skin. "Seeing how much I can make you squirm before you come," he continued, looking up at Edward with a wink and a sparkle in his eyes.

"Fuck," Edward breathed, the word somewhat strangled as Jasper changed the intensity on the vibrator again. He shifted his hips again, trying to press down and get more contact.

"We'll get to that later," Jasper said playfully before taking Edward back into his mouth.

"Oh..." Edward breathed wordlessly. It was almost too much at once, but fuck, it felt good. He threaded the fingers of his right hand comfortably into Jasper's hair, tugging lightly on the strands of hair growing damp at the roots from perspiration as Jasper's mouth worked him over, the occasional scrape of teeth lightly grazing over him. He fought not to move too much, but he couldn't help but squirm as his arousal grew, his body flooded with sensation as he was stimulated from both sides.

His eyes closed and his breathing grew shallow and rapid as his head fell back into the bed. Jasper continued to toy with the vibrator, changing the settings at random. He kept Edward on the cusp, backing off after a few minutes, trading his skilled tongue for lips and nose, letting Edward relax slightly before diving right back in full steam.

Edward's senses were on overload. "Oh, fuck, Jasper," he whimpered. His left hand fisted in the sheets as he felt his whole body tremble and scream for release. "Please, baby, please," he heard himself beg.

Jasper's only response was to thumb the vibrator down a step, making Edward bite back a sob as the release he needed was denied. He rode the crest of pleasure so intense it was almost painful as Jasper's tongue wrapped around his cock and gave another long sweeping sucking lick. Just as he was about to beg Jasper again, the toy was nudged just so, and the spark it set off triggered his orgasm. He tightened the one hand he had tangled around Jasper's hair in warning and just as he hit his peak, Jasper used his free hand to pull out the toy, sending Edward spiraling even higher.

When Edward came back down, he felt Jasper's hands lightly massaging his thighs; the muscles were twitching a bit, having been held in a foreign position for so long. Edward opened his eyes and by the look on Jasper's face, his partner was completely satisfied by his performance. He felt too satiated to move, but he managed a smile for Jasper, who laughed softly.

Jasper shifted, running his hands up Edward's sides until they were face to face again, and Jasper kissed him sweetly. Edward could taste the hint of himself on Jasper's tongue. "Are you back?" Jasper asked quietly, shifting to one side, his head propped on a hand, his other hand skimming idly over Edward's chest and belly.

"Was I gone?" Edward asked in response.

"Mm, for a couple minutes," Jasper said, amused.

"Oh."

Jasper laughed quietly again, bending over to kiss Edward once more.

Edward turned his head, still feeling too languid to attempt to move. "Did you...?" Because the least he could was to make sure he reciprocated after that performance.

"I had a spare hand, baby," Jasper assured him with another low chuckle. "That was pretty fuckin' hot. Is it wrong of me to hope you picked up a few more things?" He bent forward and kissed Edward's stomach.

Edward smiled and shook his head. "Nope. And I did, but maybe we need to sit down and browse the website together?" he suggested.

Jasper let loose another of those quiet growls from deep in his chest and he all but pounced on Edward again. Edward moaned quietly into another deep kiss, but Jasper just cupped Edward's face lightly in his palms and looked down into his eyes. "I love you, you know that, right?"

Edward nodded, his smile softening a bit. "I know, baby. I love you, too."

Jasper smiled and kissed him again lightly before resettling on Edward's side, throwing his leg across Edward's and reaching for one of the blankets to drape over them. They dozed for a bit, just savoring the quiet contact between them, Edward, for one, needing the chance to just recharge his connection to Jasper, even as no words were exchanged between them. After awhile, Jasper pressed a light kiss to Edward's breastbone, near his heart, and rose from the bed. He returned a moment later with a damp cloth and dry towel and lavished Edward with a whole other kind of attention as he cleaned him up and took the toys away to rinse off and pack up to be cleaned.

When Jasper ducked back into the bathroom, Edward rose and dug out the lounge clothes he'd packed. There was still a bit of time before dinner would be delivered, so they just laid together, exchanging lazy touches and gentle kisses. There was no music or TV to interrupt or occupy them as they just focused on keeping their reconnection alive with the thin barrier of pajama pants between them.

Edward got up to open the door at the knock. He tipped the delivery boy and felt Jasper's eyes on him as he carried the bags into the room and began rifling through them to find the right containers. For Bella he'd ordered chicken instead of steak (knowing she preferred white meat in large portions), so he set hers aside, making a note to see that she got it the next day. Once everything was set out, Jasper joined him at the table.

They remained in contact as they ate, fingers brushing against hands or feet nudging at calves and ankles under the table. Edward had ordered different side dishes so they could share, and they fed each other through easy conversation as they caught up on their weeks. Jasper had been attending his therapy sessions, he reported, but didn't feel like it'd been helping much, and was thinking about asking for another referral, since it seemed like he wasn't going to get along well with his current therapist. Edward filled Jasper in on his progress in physical therapy, and they talked about when they could start taking the meditation classes that they'd put off for the first few weeks of the semester.

For dessert Edward had ordered bread pudding that they shared. It brought back memories of their breakfast in San Francisco several weeks previous as they nipped pieces out of each other's fingers and tried not to make a mess. Once they finished eating, they took the remainder of the bottle of wine Edward had ordered back to bed with them. Jasper sat up against the head board of the bed while Edward curled into his side.

After a bit, Edward's hands began to wander over Jasper's chest, followed by his lips. After shoving the empty wine glasses away, Jasper slid down into the bed, and let Edward worship his body. Edward focused on making Jasper feel as good as Jasper had made him feel earlier in the evening, working him up quickly but bringing him down slowly. Jasper let Edward love him, and after they had both found another release they shared another round of tender kisses and touches.

They made love once more that night before they both fell into a much needed sleep, completely relaxed and wrapped up in each other. Edward slept solidly, comforted by Jasper's arm over his waist and the soft snores that stirred Edward's hair.

Edward woke early the next morning. Jasper was sleeping peacefully, and they didn't have to be to school until eight, so he threw on his jeans and grabbed his car keys. Town was quiet as he drove through the streets to the grocery store. He ordered coffee from the barista station and purchased breakfast sandwiches at the deli and made his way back to the hotel while everything was still warm.

Jasper had curled himself around Edward's pillow in his absence. Edward placed his purchases on the table and climbed back onto the bed, running a finger down Jasper's bare spine. Jasper squirmed a little and made a quiet noise. Edward smiled and repeated the motion.

"Quit it," Jasper murmured.

"But I'm awake and you're not," Edward said, bending to press a kiss to the back of Jasper's neck.

"Fine," Jasper said with a gusty sigh. He released Edward's pillow and turned over to face Edward, a sleepy smile on his face. "Mornin'."

"Good morning. I brought breakfast."

"Mm. I love you," Jasper said.

Edward laughed quietly. "I know." He kissed Jasper.

"How much time have we got?" Jasper asked.

"A little over an hour until we should probably be back on campus," Edward answered. He rose from the bed and limped to the table to retrieve their breakfast. He and Jasper ate with the blankets pooled around their waists, Edward careful not to lean into Jasper's wounded shoulder too heavily. Jasper resolved that by draping that arm over Edward's shoulders so he could lean in under the bruising.

"Did you bring school clothes?" Jasper asked as they cleaned up their wrappers and stuffed them into their empty coffee cups.

"Of course," Edward said, mocking offense. "You don't think I can plan a get away as well as you can?"

Jasper growled softly and tackled Edward playfully into the bed. Edward let himself be pinned and Jasper kissed him thoroughly senseless. Edward slid his hands into Jasper's hair and their legs tangled together as Jasper's lips roamed over Edward's face, neck, and collarbone. When Jasper nuzzled his face into the juncture of Edward's neck and shoulder, Edward held him close as the shuddered breath washed over his skin.

Edward kissed Jasper's temple and hummed quietly as they laid there for a few minutes. Despite the chance they'd had to reconnect over the previous evening, Edward knew there were still some things they needed to address and fix between them. Nothing was irreparable, Edward knew, but despite the openness they'd developed, there had still been a lack of communication between him and Jasper that had led to hurt on both sides.

"Okay?" He asked Jasper quietly when he felt another heavier wash of breath against his skin.

"Yeah," Jasper answered hoarsely. "I've just missed this."

"I know, baby. Me too," Edward assured him. "Just two more weeks and we'll have our weekends back," he consoled his partner. "We can make it."

"Yes we can," Jasper agreed quietly.

"And then it's just a few more months until school's out, and we can move back into the house and start looking for our own place, if that's what we want," Edward said. "But we'll have our weekends once February is over, and that will be enough." Edward hoped that was true.

Jasper nodded against Edward's neck. "I know," he said softly.

"We'll go away next weekend," Edward reminded him. "And maybe you and Bella could keep each other company while I'm in Idaho?" he suggested. Edward knew that Bella would be able to bring Jasper some comfort, no matter the outcome of their conversation over their weekend away.

"Yeah," Jasper breathed. "Sorry for being clingy."

Edward smiled softly and nosed along Jasper's temple. "You don't need to apologize. Sometimes we just need it."

Jasper nodded again and Edward kissed his head. "We'd better get a move on or we'll be late," he said regretfully.

"Okay," Jasper agreed. "Though you lose points for not getting us subs so we could take the day off."

"Picky, picky," Edward chided. "Come on, baby, into the shower." He smacked Jasper's ass lightly (knowing from the evening before that he wasn't hurt there).

Jasper kissed Edward's pulse point before shifting away, trailing his hand over Edward's body as he moved to rise. "Join me?" He asked, climbing to his feet.

"Of course," Edward answered, following him into the bathroom. The tub was large enough to easily accommodate them. They took turns washing each other with lingering looks and wandering hands. Edward noted that Jasper didn't bother to shave that morning, and he kind of liked the feel of his stubble against his palms (and cheeks, he discovered as he kept finding ways to nudge and nuzzle Jasper with his nose).

They were mostly quiet as they dressed back in the main room. Edward noticed that Jasper rolled his dirty clothes up before putting them into his bag; Edward just shoved his in, since they'd all be dumped in the hamper anyway when they got back to campus. Like he'd done with his students over the previous weekends, Edward did a sweep of the room before they left, making sure nothing had been left behind.

Back on campus, he and Jasper parted at the car. They exchanged a final long, lingering kiss, before promising to see each other at dinner after rehearsal and office hours. Edward knew rehearsal would be short, because they had some time before the next concert and he hadn't had a chance yet to start pulling pieces for sight reading, and his students deserved the break.

Edward headed off for his room to drop his laundry and grab the things he'd need for the day feeling a lot more positive about starting a week than he had in nearly a month.

* * *

I've got links to the toys over on the blog: reallifebandgeek . blogspot . com

I think I may have failed a bit in realism with the James time line. For that I apologize and plead creative license; this is really the place where it fit best.

And once again, thank you to my awesome readers. This fic is close to breaking 2k reviews, which is huge for me. Thank you so much for continuing to read and letting me hear your thoughts on how things are going. I look forward to hearing what y'all thought about this chapter. ;)


	42. Chapter 41: Love Song

**Readers, I [heart] you all. Srsly. :D**

**As always, thanks to the beta team: Naelany and wishingforlove for holding my hand through this, and not letting me slip into British spellings of things.**

**The chapter title comes from the Sara Bareilles song, not the 311 song (though that one is amazing, too). There's a video embedded at the blog.**

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It really shouldn't have surprised him, but Jasper was amazed at how much better his week went, knowing he'd have Edward (and Bella) all to himself for the weekend. It helped too, he thought, that he and Edward seemed remarkably less tense going into the week. Part of that could have been the chance that they'd had to reconnect over the weekend, or the proverbial light at the end of the proverbial tunnel when it came to Edward's whirlwind weekend tours and their lack of time together. Either way, Jasper felt like everything was just easier than it had been the three weeks previous.

Their relationship with Bella seemed to be becoming slightly more defined as well. Though they really only saw each other at meals, Jasper noticed that both he and Edward were more casual in their physical affection with her, often sandwiching her between them at mealtimes. She flirted with them both, to Emmett's amusement, but Jasper at least was careful not to go further with anything that it seemed she was comfortable with, unless she initiated. Wednesday morning, they walked to their office from breakfast together, her left arm around his waist, her right crossed over her body to hold onto his right. It just felt comfortable and right, as he'd explained to Edward. Edward's invitation for her to spend Valentine's with them had apparently opened a door that Bella was willing to step through.

Even Jasper's appointment with his therapist, Dr. Sheila Jones, on Thursday evening seemed to be more productive than the first few had been. Things finally seemed to click with her, which could have been just because Jasper was finally able to focus a bit more on his long-term goals rather than his current emotions. They'd spent the session talking about Jasper's feelings for Edward and Bella, and she'd helped him think about his attraction to them both so he could start making more progress in dealing with his newfound self-identity. She had even assured him that, even if his physical attraction to Bella wasn't as strong as his draw to Edward, that there was no shame in a purely emotional relationship between them, so long as communication remained open and the three of them understood and supported each other. It made Jasper feel a bit reassured that he wasn't completely a freak, or going slightly crazy. She wanted him to be ready to tell her how the weekend went in their next session.

Friday morning after returning from the gym (and noting Edward's curious absence), Jasper packed up a bag for the weekend before he went to breakfast. He and Edward were leaving campus after classes, skipping dinner with the gang, and having dinner out as a mini-date before checking into their hotel in Port Angeles for two nights. Bella agreed to join them on Saturday mid-morning, and they'd spend the day together. Jasper left his bag sitting on the foot of the bed and set out for breakfast.

He found Edward seated next to Bella in the dining hall after getting scrambled eggs, fried potatoes, and bacon from the server behind the line, and a cup of coffee. "Hey," he greeted them both, giving Edward's shoulder a squeeze and kissing the top of Bella's head before he sat on her other side. "Missed you at the gym this morning," he said to Edward as his boyfriend slid the hot sauce, pepper, and salt down the table.

"I kind of got used to skipping on Friday," Edward admitted sheepishly. "I slept in."

Jasper laughed quietly. "Good for you," he said as he doctored his eggs. Jasper hadn't been in a position to sleep in since Monday morning at the hotel, and he couldn't hold it against Edward if he could.

"Are you still not sleeping?" Bella asked quietly next to him.

"I'm doing better," he assured her. He really was; he'd managed three to four consecutive hours a night since Monday.

"Hm," she answered, reaching over and running her thumb lightly under his eye, where he knew there was still a light purple blemish, evidence of his sleepless nights. "I'm not sure I believe you," she said as she pulled her hand away.

"I wouldn't lie to you, sweetheart," he answered.

She nodded, smiling softly, and went back to her oatmeal as Jasper started on his breakfast. Edward said something to her that Jasper couldn't hear which made her brighten a bit and Jasper grinned at Edward's wink. "What time are you guys leaving tonight?" she asked.

"Right after classes," Edward answered. "Sure we can't persuade you to join us tonight instead of tomorrow?"

Bella shook her head, lowering her cup of tea. "Nope," she said after she swallowed. "If I'm going to spend Saturday out of town I have to get some work done tonight. Sunday's set aside for the symposium planning."

"Bit last minute isn't it?" Jasper asked.

"Not really," Bella shrugged. "It's always like this, putting everything together as the details change," she explained. "Fortunately, Aimee is a great assistant and the conference itself has a strong enough reputation now that I'm not flying solo like I was my first year here."

"Well, I'll gladly donate Jasper's service to you next weekend for anything you need," Edward offered.

"Gee, thanks," Jasper drawled dryly, causing Bella to giggle. Depending on how things went in Port Angeles, he'd likely be spending the weekend with her anyways.

"Anytime," Edward promised with a wink.

They finished up their breakfasts and Jasper and Bella walked together to the Humanities building. There hadn't been anymore snow since the previous weekend, to the students' disappointment, but the temperatures had stayed pretty low, and Jasper was looking forward to getting to stay in the building for most of the day.

His classes ran smoothly; it was only four weeks into the semester and most of his classes were having review sessions before exams on Monday. The mug Alice had given him for Christmas was pressed into good use as he kept hot coffee in it through most of the day. When his last class was out at 5:15, Jasper had to keep himself from bolting out the door behind his students. Instead, he took his time packing up his bag before returning to the office after he rinsed his mug in the washroom sink.

Before he left, he folded Bella into a hug and kissed her softly. "I'll see you tomorrow, sweetheart."

"Have a good night, Jazzy," she said with a smile, kissing him back. "Drive safe."

He tugged lightly on a length of her hair before he stepped away, his messenger bag over his shoulder.

Back in his room, Jasper double checked his bag had everything he needed for the weekend, grabbed his keys, phone, and the bag and flung the door open to find Edward waiting on the other side, smiling brightly, his bag slung over his shoulder.

"Someone's eager to get going," Edward quipped, lowering his hand from where he'd been poised to knock.

"Says you, who had to have cut rehearsal a few minutes short to get here this fast," Jasper chided.

"Maybe," Edward answered with a grin.

Jasper gave him a brief kiss, and they were off to Edward's car. They decided to grab dinner at the diner, since they hadn't been as a couple since before New Year's. Maggie let them take the booth they preferred at the back of the restaurant, and she brought them coffee and iced tea before they could order.

"I was beginning to wonder if you two had disappeared on me," she said as she delivered their drinks and pulled out her notepad to take their order.

"Just had vacation time," Edward explained with a grin. "But we missed you, too."

"Such a charmer," Maggie said dryly, winking at Jasper. "You boys ready to order?"

Edward ordered a cheeseburger and Jasper got a turkey melt. Jasper played with his straw as Maggie walked away and Edward sweetened his coffee. A bit of anxiety was beginning to creep up Jasper's spine and settle in his stomach. He tried to tamp it down and focus on the idea that he was getting to be away with Edward (and Bella) for the weekend, but it just seemed to tighten.

"What's the matter?" Edward asked quietly.

Jasper shook his head. "Nothing," he answered quickly.

"Jas, come on," Edward chided. "You don't think I can read you better than that?"

Jasper sighed softly. "What if this doesn't go well?" he asked softly.

"What if what doesn't go well, baby?" Edward asked, small frown lines appearing on his brow between his eyes.

"Bella," Jasper said. "What if we're reading things wrong, and she freaks out about things?"

"She won't," Edward said confidently, but in a quiet voice.

"You can't know that for sure," Jasper responded.

"Maybe not," Edward conceded. "But I think you're worried about nothing."

"Am I? I really don't want to lose her friendship if we've misread the situation," Jasper explained.

"Baby, listen," Edward said, reaching across the table to still Jasper's hand, still playing with the straw wrapper. "At Valentine's day she didn't say no. She said not yet. I don't think we've got the wrong impression."

Jasper nodded. The small knot of emotions in his stomach didn't lessen, though.

"We'll take it as it comes, alright?" Edward asked. "If someone freaks out, we'll talk through it," Edward said, and Jasper got what Edward was really saying; any of the three of them could take issue with what was going to be proposed (or at least explicitly stated for the first time) and need to be calmed and quietly cared for.

"Okay," Jasper agreed as Maggie brought their dinner.

"Are you sure _you're_ okay with this?" Edward asked as he reached for the ketchup for his fries.

"I'm sure that I want to see what happens," Jasper hedged. "I'm trying to have faith and trust in myself, and you, that we can try this and not let anyone get hurt. I'm willing to try, because I feel like there's something there, like Bella plays some integral role in our lives. I just don't want her to get hurt if…"

"If you're not as physically attracted to her as you think you might be?" Edward finished softly.

Jasper nodded.

"Then we'll talk about it," Edward promised. "We'll figure it out together, Jasper. None of us are going into this alone."

"I know," Jasper said on a sigh. He watched as Edward studied him for a moment. Apparently his lover saw that Jasper was having problems putting all his worries into thoughts and nudged him under the table.

"Eat," Edward urged, pointing a ketchup laden fry at Jasper's plate. "Try not to worry too much, baby. Things have a way of working out, whether we expect them to or not. We may have to redefine some boundaries if things don't turn out the way we've planned or hoped, but that's not necessarily a bad thing in itself."

Jasper grabbed the ketchup from Edward's side of the table and poured out a bit for his onion rings. "Yeah, I know," he responded.

"You're just a worrier," Edward finished with a grin.

Jasper rolled his eyes but smiled. It was mostly true, anyway. He wasn't sure if he'd classify himself a worrier, but he did have a habit of internalizing and over-processing everything, as the previous few weeks had demonstrated.

Jasper paid the tab for dinner (after ordering pie to go for dessert), and Edward drove to Port Angeles. Jasper played with the iPod in the dock before he dozed off. He hadn't meant to, but despite his truthful statement to Bella about getting more sleep, he was still tired, and the car was warm and quiet. He woke with a start as Edward pulled the car into the hotel parking lot.

"Fuck, I'm sorry, Edward," he apologized after a yawn.

"No worries, baby," Edward assured him as he parked. He turned off the car and leaned over the console to kiss Jasper softly. "Now you're well rested for tonight," he said in a low voice against Jasper's ear.

"Are you plotting again?" Jasper asked, unbuckling his seatbelt as Edward did the same.

Edward just grinned and climbed out of the car.

Jasper followed, grabbing their overnight bags from the trunk. Edward waited for him at the front of the car and they walked into the hotel together. Edward took care of checking them in, since he'd made the reservation, and collected the keys. They made their way down the hall to the stairwell, and Jasper adjusted his stride to match Edward's as he slowed to ascend the stairs. It must've been a pretty good day for Edward to have not requested a move to the first floor, or else he was really feeling more confident.

With Jasper's hands full, Edward let them into the room. Jasper dumped the bags on top of the bureau in the fairly standard hotel room. There was a single king sized bed and a round table with two chairs, and a television on the bureau across from the foot of the bed.

It was well after dark, and the one light that Edward had switched on spilled a small circle of yellow light that was just enough to keep them from accidently bumping into each other.

Intentional bumping, however, was apparently fair game, as Edward approached Jasper, pressing their chests tightly together before he guided Jasper back toward the bed. Jasper stopped when the backs of his legs hit the mattress, but Edward pressed down on his shoulders, so he sat.

Edward knelt between Jasper's legs and reached for his belt. Jasper smiled and ran his hands lightly over Edward's cheeks before settling one hand in Edward's coppery colored hair, lightly combing as Edward unfastened his belt and untucked his shirt. Jasper felt his breathing hitch a bit as Edward's fingers brushed against his undershirt as he unbuttoned Jasper's shirt from the bottom up. Edward had to stretch slightly to kiss Jasper as he undid the last button.

Edward shifted and his lips slid over Jasper's stubble on his jaw and cheeks on his way up to his ear. "Will you-?" Edward asked softly, scraping his teeth lightly over Jasper's earlobe as he drew it into his mouth.

"Yes," Jasper answered without hesitation before Edward could even finish his question. Though he was more of a natural top, Jasper had bottomed for other men before, but none he'd trusted and loved as much as Edward. No one had ever hurt him, but he'd never let it be anything more than physical with anyone but Edward.

Edward kissed the soft skin behind Jasper's ear before shifting and giving Jasper one of his breathtakingly beautiful full-fledged smiles. "I love you," Edward said quietly, sliding his hands under Jasper's thin t-shirt.

"I love you, too," Jasper answered, lifting his arms as Edward dragged his shirt up and over his head. "Come here," he said, tugging lightly on Edward's arms to make him stand between Jasper's legs.

Jasper repeated Edward's motions, slowly stripping him of his shirts with sure fingers that lightly teased along the way; he enjoyed the twitch of Edward's muscles under his touch. When he was finished, Edward kissed him deeply, threading his fingers in Jasper's hair before he stepped away with an impish smirk.

Edward went to his bag on the bureau and came back with a handful of goodies, which he dropped on the bed. Jasper watched with a fond smile as Edward slowly stripped Jasper of his remaining clothes before kicking his own trousers across the room and joining him on the bed.

There was no rush or urgency to their intimacy, despite the weeks spent apart. The few hours they'd been able to spend together for Valentine's Day the previous week just amplified for Jasper the amount of time that he and Edward had spent separated from each other, but as much as Jasper tried to spur Edward on, his lover just backed off with an evil smirk. Edward tenderly lavished Jasper with attention as Jasper whispered his encouragement when Edward hit a particularly sensitive place with his lips or fingers.

Edward slowly prepped him with lubed fingers, making Jasper squirm slightly at the insufficient contact. When Jasper tried to turn some attention back on Edward, he was quietly shushed with Edward's lips against his. "Up on your knees, lover," Edward guided, as he similarly knelt then sat back on his heels. "Your back to me."

Jasper did as asked, rising up on his knees and turning around to face the headboard. He felt Edward's hands on his hips for a brief moment before his right one disappeared. Small motions were rubbed against Jasper's left hip, and Jasper heard the sound of the lube opening, and the tearing of a condom wrapper.

"Sit back," Edward urged quietly.

Jasper slowly settled back, feeling Edward guide him. He felt Edward's cock slide against his ass, and then he was being gradually filled as Edward lined them up, Jasper's thighs stretching from the slow, awkward movement. He was seated on Edward and he was pleasantly full, but needed more. Jasper rocked his hips gently to get a feel for their positioning and Edward moaned, his breath warm and damp across Jasper's neck and shoulder.

Jasper rose up slightly, feeling the good burn in his thighs along with the rush of emotion and sensation from being so intimately connected with Edward. As he sat back, Edward flexed up forward to meet him, thrusting harder than Jasper had expected, and he groaned in pleasure as his head fell back onto Edward's shoulder.

They moved together in an easy rhythm, Edward's hands on Jasper's hips, nipples, or cock, coaxing every last bit of sensation from Jasper's body. Jasper reached back to caress over Edward's skin as well and they exchanged kisses over faces and shoulders. Edward kissed Jasper deeply as he found his release over Edward's hand, his eyes closing as his back arched slightly. He slumped forward slightly as Edward thrusted up into him twice more before he came, scraping his teeth over Jasper's neck as he bit down gently.

Jasper easily shouldered Edward's weight as he tipped forward as well. They remained that way as their breathing slowed, Edward's hands drifting over Jasper's skin. It didn't take long for Jasper to shift up, trying to relieve the ache in his thighs and he sighed, mourning the loss of the connection with Edward, but also at the change in position.

"Edward?" he asked, concerned. Edward's face was tight with pain, and he'd gone a bit pale.

"I can't move," Edward said softly. "I mean – I can, I just," he sighed, frustrated.

Jasper turned and kissed him reverently. "Hold on just a minute," he said, sliding from the bed, his fingers lingering against Edward's skin as he reached into his overnight kit, and then Edward's and returned. He spilled out Edward's dose of painkillers into his palm and passed them over.

Edward swallowed them dry while Jasper disposed of the condom.

"Okay," Jasper said, squatting down a bit. He wrapped one arm around Edward's back. "Can you raise up?" he asked gently.

Edward nodded tightly and rose up slightly off his heels. Jasper watched his thigh muscles quiver with the strain. Quickly, he slipped his other arm into the space between the backs of Edward's thighs and calves and gently lifted him a bit higher, coaxing his legs slowly to extend out in front of him. Edward whimpered quietly and Jasper kissed his temple as he straightened him out.

Once Edward was laying flat on the bed, still pale and tense, Jasper reached for the lotion in his bag. He spread some on his hands, letting it warm and slowly began to rub the tension from Edward's muscles, humming quietly, relieved when Edward began to relax from the painkillers and Jasper's attentions.

"I don't think we'll be doing that again for awhile," Jasper said quietly, his hands stilling on Edward's legs when his lover appeared to be completely relaxed.

"Probably not," Edward agreed. "I thought I would be okay," he said sadly.

"Hey, it's alright," Jasper consoled him, leaning in for another deep kiss. "It was fantastic sex."

Edward laughed quietly and nodded. Jasper tossed the lotion container, empty, toward the trash and snuggled up to Edward. "Better?"

"Yes," Edward said, turning into Jasper's body. "Thank you."

"Anytime, baby," Jasper said, kissing him softly.

Edward shifted next to him, testing his movement, Jasper guessed. He settled after a minute and Jasper wrapped his arms easily around him as they fell into a quiet peacefulness, content to just be together.

At least until Edward got up to use the bathroom and switched on the TV when he came back. Jasper didn't mind though. They sat together in the bed while Edward channel surfed and they caught up on all the small things they'd missed over the previous four weeks. Jasper was content with the physical closeness, his need to be close to Edward sated with having him in his arms while they enjoyed each other's company.

Edward finally fell asleep during one of the late night talk shows. Jasper switched off the television and got up to turn off the light and use the bathroom before he slid between the blankets and draped himself over Edward. He fell asleep easier than he had in weeks, warm and content with his partner.

Edward was still asleep when Jasper slipped from the bed early in the morning. He tugged on pajamas and a hoodie and went down to the lobby where he'd seen the coffee supplies when they'd checked in (they'd been preoccupied and hadn't thought to grab any on their way up). Jasper also grabbed the paper and a few of the pastries (and a bagel) from the breakfast bar.

When Jasper returned to the room, Edward had spread out slightly in the bed. He left everything on the bureau and climbed back into bed, easily molding his body around Edward's. Edward curled up against Jasper with a quiet noise of contentment, and Jasper smiled. He kissed the top of Edward's head to keep from disturbing him and eventually dozed back off.

Jasper was roused when he felt the bed shift. He blinked his eyes open in time to see Edward disappear around the corner into the bathroom. Jasper watched as Edward padded back into the room a few minutes later, crossing to his bag on the dresser, pawing through his bag.

"Your pills are on the table," Jasper said lightly after a moment. Edward hadn't put his glasses on yet, and Jasper had left everything out the night before.

"Thanks, baby," Edward said, coming around the bed. He slipped back between the covers and reached for the bottle on the table while Jasper shifted over, resting his head against Edward's shoulder and closing his eyes again.

Edward kissed his forehead.

"Feeling better?" Jasper asked.

"Much," Edward answered. "Want me to show you?" He asked with a wink.

"I would like nothing more," Jasper said, kissing Edward's jaw line. "But Bella's going to be here soon." He nipped lightly at the soft skin on the underside of Edward's jaw.

"She might like to watch?"

"Behave," Jasper warned, though he hugged Edward.

"Fine," Edward said with a huff. He kissed Jasper softly. "I'm going to shower."

"Mmkay." Jasper relaxed on the bed when Edward went to shower, idly flipping through the channels on the TV after he got the coffee brewing. Edward emerged with a tiny towel wrapped around his waist, and Jasper leered as Edward put on a show of whipping it off and tugging on a pair of pajama pants over boxer briefs. He snagged the paper from the bureau and joined Jasper on the bed.

They relaxed together for awhile while sipping coffee and eating breakfast, sharing the paper. It was a quiet lazy morning, and Jasper enjoyed the chance to just be with Edward.

Jasper answered the door when someone knocked about an hour later. Bella stood on the other side, dressed in yoga pants and a hoodie, a bag slung over her shoulder. As usual, she wasn't wearing any makeup and her hair had been pulled back off her face into a ponytail, making her look slightly younger than her 27 years.

"Hey, sweetheart," he greeted her, holding the door open so she could step through.

"Morning, Jazzy," she said softly, a blush creeping over her cheeks as she ducked her head a bit.

Jasper swallowed his laugh and bent to kiss her cheek before closing the door behind her. He could understand how she'd be anxious and embarrassed about the whole thing; Jasper was still trying to figure out what exactly was going on (as his worry at dinner the previous night demonstrated), but was willing to trust in his instincts (and Edward and Bella) to see where things went.

"Morning, love," Edward greeted her. He was still bare from the waist up, stretched out on the bed, propped up against the headboard with the morning paper that Jasper had grabbed, his glasses perched on his nose. "How was your drive?"

"Not bad," Bella answered, reaching up to fidget with the strap on her bag with one hand.

"Here," Jasper offered, sliding it from her shoulder. He set it on top of the bureau and then took her hand gently and led her over to the bed. After she sat on the edge, Jasper turned back to the bureau and picked up Edward's shirt and threw it at him with a pointed look. She was nervous enough without either of them going around half-naked (though Jasper preferred him that way). Edward winked back at him before his slipped it on and folded his legs up underneath him.

Sensing Bella's apprehension, Jasper grabbed one of the chairs from the table and tugged it toward the bed, slouching down into it and propping his bare feet up on the bed.

Bella sat somewhat stiffly, looking at her hands folded in her lap.

Jasper glanced at Edward who shrugged before scooting forward on the bed and draping an arm around her shoulders in a half hug. "What's wrong, Bella?" he asked quietly.

"This just feels…weird," she said softly. She glanced up at them, and then returned to staring at her hands. "Like…I dunno," she said, apparently struggling for words. "Like this is some kind of twisted booty call or something."

Jasper bit the inside of his cheek to keep from laughing, and Edward snorted quietly, not quite as successful, and Bella sighed, her shoulders hunching up as she ducked her head.

"That's not it at all," Edward rushed to console her, apparently catching on to his mistake. "Bella, sweetheart, we're not going to have sex tonight," he said bluntly.

Bella's head popped up, and Jasper couldn't contain his chuckle at that. "Oh, darlin', I'm sorry," Jasper said. "I'm not laughing at you, really. Just," he said with a wave of his hand. "This."

She smiled and nodded and seemed to relax a fraction. Jasper shifted slightly in his chair so his feet were resting against Edward's hip so the three of them were somewhat connected.

"I just wanted to bring us here so we could talk somewhere less…" Edward paused, searching for the right word. "Loaded? I mean, we could have just gone to Mom and Dad's, but I wanted some privacy and our rooms at school just didn't seem like the right space," he explained. "There's obviously something here, between the three of us, and I think we need to sort it out before things start to unravel, or someone gets hurt."

Bella nodded. She took a deep breath and began to speak quietly. As she spoke, Edward's fingers played with her hair, strands slipping in and out of his fingers. "I love you," she said in a soft voice. "I don't know for how long, I just know that sometime in the last few months I've gone from seeing you both as my best friends to something more. At first I thought maybe I was just trying to fill the void left behind by James, but over the last couple months I've come to realize that the way I feel about both of you pales to anything I ever felt for James.

"You've taken such good care of me, and for awhile, I thought that what I was feeling was just hero worship, because you're both so protective and loving, and I thought it was just almost too good to be true" she continued quietly, glancing up and offering them both timid smiles. "I know how much in love with each other you are, and I never said anything, because I didn't want to come between you." She glanced over her shoulder at Edward. "I think I've been half-way in love with you since I met you, Edward," she confessed quietly. "And I only turned you down in the beginning because I couldn't bear to be one of the girls you loved and left, even if we'd been able to remain friends afterwards. I'm just not the person to be able to do a one night stand, or even friends with benefits," she said softly.

Edward nodded his understanding and kissed her temple. She seemed to be relaxing by degrees as she spoke and got everything off her chest, and she turned her attention to Jasper.

"Somewhere in the short time I've known you Jasper, I've fallen in love with you, despite knowing that there was little chance you'd ever want to have anything to do with me romantically," she said with a light flush spreading across her cheeks. "You've understood what I've been through in a way no one else has, and you've just supported me, and been there for me without passing judgment. You're one of the sweetest, kindest, gentlest men I've ever known, and even though I feel like I've taken advantage of our relationship, you've never told me to back off, even when I made you uncomfortable."

Jasper wanted to respond, but she took another deep breath, and he held his thought as she continued. "I couldn't say anything because I couldn't bear to be shut out of your life," she whispered. "I didn't want Edward to feel like he had to choose between us, Jasper, and I didn't want you to feel like I was trying to steal your boyfriend. So I decided that I could love you both as friends, and it would be enough, that I'd find someone else eventually who would put my heart back together, because it was the right thing to do to keep my feelings to myself because you are both just so happy together."

Jasper abandoned his chair at that point and joined Bella and Edward on the bed, sitting on Bella's other side and wrapping his arm around them both as best he could. Edward looked touched at her words, and pressed his lips in a lingering kiss to the top of her head.

"I'm sorry you've had to carry that around, sweetheart," Jasper said softly, taking her hand with his free one. "Though you kind of gave it away a bit when you kissed me," he teased, trying to keep things on the lighter side.

He was rewarded with a smile for his effort.

"You are a beautiful woman, Bella," Jasper continued, giving her hand a squeeze. "Inside and out. I've only known one other person as willing to sacrifice her happiness for someone else's, and that's what makes you truly special." He glanced over at Edward and saw him nod. He took a slow deep breath before he spoke again. "You deserve to be loved, Bella. By people who love you back, who want nothing more for and from you but your happiness. Edward and I have talked about this, and we want to see how things go," he explained. "We love you, sweetheart. _I_ love you. We need you in our lives too, in whatever way you want. _That_ is what this weekend is about for us, to talk through all of this and see what happens tonight."

"But you're gay," Bella whispered, addressing the huge elephant in the room.

"I don't know what I am anymore, darlin'," Jasper confessed quietly with a half smile. He felt Edward's hand slip under the hem of his hoodie to caress his skin lightly. "All I truly know is that wherever you and Edward are is where I feel at home. The rest is a matter of physics and chemistry and we'll get it figured out, okay? I've never lied to you, and I never will, not about this. I'm being completely honest when I say that I want this," he assured her.

Bella looked at him for a long moment before turning to Edward. "Edward?"

"Yes, love?" he asked.

"Say something? You've been very quiet," Bella said.

"Jasper said it all," Edward answered with a smile, his green eyes sparkling. "I love you. We love you. You love us. We can build on that foundation, or we can leave things as they are, and it's up to you, but we'd like to see what happens."

Bella sniffled softly. "You're serious?"

"Bella, would I have invited you to spend Valentine's with us if we weren't?" Edward asked. His hand fell from her shoulder and he used it to tip her chin up slightly. Jasper smiled as he watched Edward lean forward slightly and pressed his lips to Bella's. She seemed to melt against Edward as Edward's hand slid up to cup her cheek. Jasper bent and kissed the back of her neck under her ponytail.

When Bella pulled away from Edward and looked at Jasper, her eyes were suspiciously damp and she sniffled again.

"Oh, fuck, don't cry, sweetheart," Jasper begged. He felt Edward's laughter beside him.

Bella giggled, wiping away tears that hadn't fallen. "I'm a girl, Jas. We do this."

Jasper leaned forward slowly and kissed her gently. She responded, kissing him back, her hand moving to his chest. He felt Edward's larger hand on his back as he leaned in a bit closer and kissed her neck.

Bella sat back first, which caused her to recline against Edward's chest, and he wrapped his arms easily around her waist. "This is really happening?" she asked softly.

Jasper smiled, nodded and kissed her again, then leaned over her shoulder to kiss Edward. "It really is, if that's what you want."

"It is," she said after a moment, smiling, her brown eyes brighter, and not with tears.

Edward smile was just as bright over her shoulder, and Jasper couldn't help but return it. He shifted closer and wrapped his arms around them both, sandwiching Bella between himself and Edward. He felt her breath wash across his neck as her arms slipped around his waist. He felt Edward's lips against his temple and everything just felt right.

Jasper felt whole.

Someone's stomach growled, breaking the moment. Bella looked sheepish when they separated. "I was too anxious to eat breakfast," she admitted.

"Give us a few minutes to clean up and we can go in search of lunch?" Jasper offered. He and Edward had enjoyed a lazy morning and it was after eleven in the morning, so lunch was definitely a possibility.

Bella nodded and they untangled themselves so Jasper and Edward could find real clothes to put on. While they went to the drawers where they'd unpacked their bags, Bella pulled her bag from on top of the bureau and rifled through it, coming up with a hair brush. She sat back on the bed and took her hair down while Edward and Jasper changed into jeans. When Jasper turned back around, she'd brushed her hair out so it was loose down her back and had also changed into a pair of jeans.

Edward and Jasper stuffed their wallets and room keys into their back pockets and Edward extended a hand to Bella. She took it and slid from the bed, walking hand in hand with Edward as they left the room, Jasper trailing behind. He didn't mind, though, as he watched them, Bella's head barely reaching Edward's shoulder, but her arm went easily around his waist as they walked together, Bella on Edward's right.

"Jasper?" Bella asked, looking over her shoulder.

"Hm?"

"Get up here," she said with a wave of her hand.

Jasper lengthened his stride and easily caught up to Bella's other side. She took his hand and they strode out of the hotel together, going to Edward's car.

Lunch was casual and they chatted about their weeks and activities. Jasper was still faking his way through coaching the swim team, though everyone was showing progress, so he guessed he was on the right track, and Bella and Edward reassured him that the intramurals weren't as crucial, so it was fine.

After lunch they decided to go see a movie, rather than just return to the hotel. The theater wasn't far from the restaurant, so they walked. Bella chose an interesting looking spy thriller that was new out. Despite having just had lunch, they split a popcorn and Bella and Edward insisted they needed candy to make the movie-watching experience complete. Jasper teased them as he paid for their treats and he carried the popcorn while Bella managed the closed boxes of candy and led them to their seats.

Bella ended up seated between Edward and Jasper, as Jasper had a feeling she would for quite some time as they tried to see how things would work out between them. While they waited for the movie to start, Bella pulled a bit of yarn and one of her hook thingies from her purse.

"Do you always have that on you?" Jasper asked, moving the popcorn out of her way.

She nodded. "Pretty much," she answered. "It keeps me busy so I don't fidget," she said with a smile.

"What are you making?" Edward asked, stretching his arm across the backs of both their seats (or as much as he could reach).

"Baby hats," she answered, showing them what looked like the very top of a very small hat. "I donate them to the area hospitals for the NICU and other wards."

"That's awesome, Bells," Jasper said.

She shrugged, and even in the dim light he could see a light flush spread across her cheeks. He kissed her temple and let it go as the lights dimmed for the previews and Bella tucked her work away.

The movie was alright, a bit on the silly side, but it was enjoyable. Despite only being mid-afternoon, it was starting to grow dark as a storm moved in. It was too early for them to grab dinner and no one wanted to return to the hotel just yet, so they wandered around the shopping area surrounding the movie theater. The rain held off as they walked, and they did some window shopping. Jasper was keenly aware that the whole thing had a feel of a first date, but there was none of that awkwardness with their friendship having created a great foundation for them to build on.

They eventually returned to the hotel to change for dinner. Edward had made reservations at an upscale restaurant, and Bella wanted the chance to shower and "make herself pretty." Jasper had, wisely, he thought, assured her that enhancements weren't needed, and she smiled and blushed and quietly thanked him before ducking into the bathroom.

Jasper was embraced from behind, and he felt the light scrape of stubble against his cheek. "You look happy," Edward said quietly, resting his chin on Jasper's shoulder.

"I am," Jasper said with a smile, leaning back into Edward slightly.

Edward's answering hum reverberated through Jasper's back. "It's not going to be easy, y'know," he said softly. "Being the three of us."

Jasper nodded. "I know." He knew there were a lot of things they were risking if they decided to do go forward in a relationship as the three of them. Most of society wouldn't understand, and he could only hope that the Board wouldn't decide that their relationship would have a negative effect on the students and force them to choose each other over their jobs. It was something he'd thought about over the past week. "But the only people who matter to me are our family."

"All of whom will probably gloat and say they saw it coming," Edward said dryly.

Jasper laughed and turned in Edward's arms, wrapping his arms loosely around Edward's hips. "That's okay, if that means they're accepting."

"Dad might be cautious. Mom's too much of a romantic to say anything," Edward agreed, then kissed Jasper lightly.

"And you?" Jasper asked, slipping his hand under Edward's shirt to caress the skin at the base of his spine lightly. "You have been quiet about everything."

Edward smiled. "I'm happy," he said simply. "I've thought about this, maybe even before it was brought up back in that parking lot, though maybe not in such detail," he admitted. "I wasn't sure it was something you'd be interested in, but the fact that you're willing to try this, to open your heart and life to another person that I also love just makes me love you all that much more."

"I love you too," Jasper said softly before kissing Edward. He heard the shower shut off. "We should probably get dressed."

"Yeah."

They stepped away from each other and Jasper dug out the button up shirt he'd packed for dinner. He hadn't thought to bring another pair of shoes, so he'd have to go in his trainers, but since it looked like Edward would be in his Chucks, he wasn't too worried about it. He ran his fingers through his hair, thinking about getting a haircut (it had been almost a year, and his hair was nearly chin length and wavy).

Bella emerged from the bathroom a few minutes later, her hair wavy and loose down her back, a small amount of makeup on her face. She was wearing a modest blue dress that hugged her curves and stopped just below her knees.

"Honey, you look lovely," Jasper complimented her. He took her hand and kissed her cheek lightly.

"Thanks, Jazzy," she said quietly, ducking her head.

Jasper hoped that someday she'd be comfortable accepting an honest compliment again. Though she was clearly making progress, James had done serious damage to her self-confidence.

"Lovely isn't quite the word I'd use, but I have to agree," Edward said. He'd pulled on an olive green dress shirt under a black sweater with his jeans. His hair was mussed as usual, and he'd left his glasses on all day; Jasper thought he looked like a gorgeous geek.

Jasper took his turn in the shower, getting in and out quickly and dressing in the bathroom. When he came back into the main room, Edward and Bella were sitting close together at the foot of the bed, and Jasper smiled, watching them. The affection between them was clear in their body language; Bella leaned toward Edward as they spoke, and Edward held her hand between both of his, her face painted with a light blush.

He crossed the room without interrupting them to grab a clean pair of socks and his shoes. Jasper sat in one of the chairs to tug them on. He smiled as he watched Bella kiss Edward's cheek then rise, smoothing her dress down before she crossed to her bag for her shoes.

"Ready?" Edward asked as he rose.

"Yes," Bella answered, slipping into a pair of black shoes with a low heel.

Jasper helped Bella into her coat before shrugging into his own. With Bella between him and Edward again, they headed back out. Jasper held the passenger door of Edward's car for Bella to slide into the front seat and he slipped into the back.

Edward took Bella's arm as they walked into the restaurant, though Jasper walked alongside Edward. Though it had only been a couple of months, he could see that the physical therapy Edward was doing three times a week was working, as he seemed to be relying less on his cane for physical support walking, and more for assistance with his balance. Though he didn't know the details of Edward's accident, he knew that his lover had issues with his balance as well as the physical impairment that had left him with the limp. It made Jasper happy to see Edward moving easier and finally trusting someone to help him reach his goals. He knew it was a possibility that Edward would never truly be free of the cane he relied on, but already Edward seemed happier and more confident than he had when Jasper had first met him.

They got a few odd looks at the restaurant, but Jasper shrugged it off. There was no need to justify their relationship to people they'd probably never see again, though he was grateful that they hadn't been seated in a booth so that they could sit comfortably each on a side without having to think about who sat near whom.

Jasper was unable to push aside his upbringing, though, and held Bella's chair for her as she sat, earning him an amused but fond grin from Edward. The hostess handed them menus with what looked like an envious smile before reporting their server would be right with them.

He glanced over the top of his menu to see Bella chewing her bottom lip. "What's the matter, sweetheart?" he asked quietly.

She shook her head and released her lip from her teeth. "Nothing," she said with a soft smile.

"Hm," he said, returning her smile. He didn't believe her, but let it go.

"Hi, I'm Jason, and I'll be your server tonight," a voice interrupted. "Can I start you off with something to drink?"

"Bella?" Edward deferred to her.

"Oh, um," she stammered. "I'll have a glass of your house Chardonnay," she decided with a smile.

"And for you?" Jason asked Edward next.

Edward looked to Jasper, a question in his eyes. Jasper shrugged and nodded. If Edward wanted to drink, Jasper would be happy to drive. "Scotch and soda," Edward ordered.

"Iced tea, please, with lemon," Jasper requested.

"Alright. Do you need a few more minutes to decide?"

Again, Jasper and Edward both deferred to Bella. "Yes, please," she answered quietly, a blush spreading across her cheeks.

Jason nodded and departed.

Jasper took Bella's hand lightly on the table and gave it a soft squeeze, and he noticed Edward's hand slip under the table across from him. Bella's blush deepened for a moment before her complexion returned to normal. Jasper continued to look over the menu for another moment until he decided what he wanted, and closed it.

"Decided yet, love?" Edward asked.

Jasper didn't answer, assuming he was speaking to Bella; that pet-name was generally reserved for her, and Jasper didn't mind.

"Bella?" Edward prompted after a moment.

"Oh, me? Yes," she answered with a shy smile, flipping her menu closed.

"Are you alright?" Edward asked gently.

She nodded. "It's just been awhile since I've been out anywhere this nice," she said, obviously slightly embarrassed.

"Me too, darlin'," Jasper responded. "But don't worry about it. I won't let you drink enough to embarrass yourself," he teased.

Bella smiled. "That's not exactly it, but I'm glad you'll be there to protect my virtue," she said dryly.

"If it's the prices," Edward remarked quietly, "Don't worry. Jasper's paying," he said with a wink.

"But-"

"Nope," Jasper cut her off. "My turn."

"You paid for lunch and the movie," she protested.

"So? Let me be a gentleman and pay for the first date, okay?" He asked, reaching again for her hand.

"Please, love," Edward added. "Our treat."

Bella bit her lip, but nodded, her eyes softening. "This time," she said.

"I promise, Bella, I will let you pay for the next date," Jasper swore.

"Me too." Edward smiled.

"Good," Bella said with a firm nod, but Jasper could see she was fighting a smile.

"Have you decided?" Jason was back, setting their drinks down on the table.

Jasper and Edward both turned to Bella. "I'd like the salmon, please," Bella requested.

Once they'd all ordered and Jason had collected their menus, Bella seemed to relax a bit more. She sipped at her wine and picked at a breadstick from the basket while they chatted.

"Are you looking forward to your trip?" Bella asked Edward.

"Yes and no," Edward answered. "I'm not looking forward to leaving on Thursday morning and being back really late on Sunday. But it'll be a good experience for the band, and the concerts are always good at this festival."

"Why are you leaving so early?" Bella asked as Edward took a sip off his drink. Jasper stretched his legs out under the table and ran his toes lightly up Edward's calf.

"It's a five day festival," Edward explained. "We wanted to give the students as much exposure as possible, so we're trying to be there all day Friday, Saturday, and for the morning stuff on Sunday. Plus, it's a ten hour drive, at least, on the bus," Edward groused.

"Are you going to be okay?" Bella asked quietly, concerned.

Edward nodded and smiled. "Of course, love. I make sure to get a hotel with a pool, for me as much as the students, so I can swim to loosen up. But I'm on better painkillers now, and the therapy is working; even though long rides still suck, they don't incapacitate me the way they used to."

Jason brought around their salads (with Edward's dressing on the side) which interrupted their conversation, but they soon picked up after he disappeared again.

"You know, you don't have to help with the symposium," Bella said, unwrapping her silverware and draping her napkin across her lap. "Both of you need the time to recharge after the last few weeks."

"We said we'd help, sweetheart, we'll be there," Jasper promised. "Besides, I've been looking forward to it for months."

"He has to meet the author he's been secretly crushing on for years," Edward teased, and Bella giggled.

"Hey, that's not fair," Jasper complained, winking at Bella. "I just happen to think she's a very talented writer, that's all."

"Sure, sure," Edward said, feigning disbelief. "But seriously, Bella, we'll be there for whatever you need."

"Thanks," she said with a bright smile.

The rest of dinner passed in good food and great companionship. Jasper enjoyed watching Bella's face flush as she finished her second glass of wine, and the looks of utter contentment on his dining partners' faces as they split a death by chocolate dessert (Jasper had coffee and tiramisu, which Edward also nibbled on). Jasper drove back to the hotel while Edward and Bella snuggled up in the back seat together.

Jasper helped Bella from the car when they returned to the hotel, and she leaned on his arm as they walked back inside, Edward on her other side.

"So what's the plan for tonight?" Bella asked as she shed her coat into Jasper's hands and kicked her shoes off when they'd gotten up to the room.

"Will either of you be disappointed if I ask if we can just stay in?" Edward asked, also taking off his coat. "I have a couple of scores I need to review."

"Not at all, baby," Jasper answered, kissing him softly as he passed. He took Edward's coat and hung them all over the backs of chairs. "I've got some history club reading to do." His schoolwork could wait until Sunday evening.

Bella smiled and nodded. "You don't need to entertain me," she said. "I have things to do."

"Thanks," Edward said with a smile. He bent to kiss Bella softly. "I'm going to run back down to the lobby for some more coffee and tea bags. I'll be back in a few minutes." He scooped his key back up from the table and grinned at them over his shoulder. Jasper had the distinct impression that Edward wanted to give them a few minutes alone.

He took the three steps that he needed to close the distance between himself and Bella. Jasper wrapped his arms around her shoulders and tugged her into a hug. Her arms twined around his waist and she sighed quietly as she turned her cheek to rest against his chest. Jasper held her for a long moment, swaying a bit to unheard music, his chin resting lightly against the top of her head.

Bella moved with him, though their feet remained rooted to the floor. "Are you really okay with this, Jasper?" she asked quietly.

"I really truly am, Bella," he answered. "Does it feel like I'm not?"

She shook her head slightly, still nestled against his chest. "No." She paused, and Jasper waited. "Words can lie, Jasper, so hearing you say it is one thing. I know firsthand how easy it is for words to deceive. But actions are harder to hide. Those three words? They're over-used, and they're not always enough. This, this is real and true," she said quietly, hugging him a bit tighter. "Sometimes you may need to remind me this way."

Jasper nodded and shifted one of his hands to tilt her chin up. "Just say the word, sweetheart," he said, looking down into her eyes. He kissed her lightly, barely more than a brush of flesh on flesh, but it was enough of a physical reassurance for both of them, and she went back to resting her cheek against his chest as he held her. Jasper made a silent promise to never hurt the woman in his arms, and, like he'd resolved with Edward, to love her the best way he could.

Edward returned after a couple minutes and he wrapped his arms around them both from behind Bella after he dropped his things on the bed. Edward kissed Jasper softly over the top of Bella's head before he kissed her temple. They remained standing for a few minutes, Edward humming quietly, and Jasper thought he felt Bella tremble slightly and her breathing stutter, but after a moment she lifted her head and smiled up at Jasper, then turned to look over her shoulder at Edward. "I think I'm going to change," she said.

Jasper nodded and let her go. Edward embraced and kissed her softly before he did the same. When she went into the bathroom with her bag, Edward and Jasper changed also, back into their pajamas. Edward grabbed his scores from his bag and settled against the headboard with a pencil, and Jasper sat next to him with the next book for History club.

Bella returned from the bathroom in a tank top and a pair of flannel pajama pants that were too big on her, but that looked adorable. Her feet were bare, and she jumped up on the bed and placed her feet (carefully) in Jasper's lap, wiggling her toes at him.

Jasper shot her a questioning look, setting his book aside so his hands could curl around her ankles.

"You said you'd keep my feet warm sometime we weren't in public," Bella reminded him.

"Yes I did," he answered.

Bella smiled and laid back, her head going against one of Edward's thighs. Edward smiled at her over the top of the score he was reviewing, and spared a hand to comb through her hair as he studied. Jasper slipped out from under her feet patting her calf lightly and went into the bathroom. He returned with the complimentary bottle of hand lotion and resettled himself on the bed, placing her feet back in his lap.

He dabbed a bit of lotion on his palms and let it warm for a minute before he started running his hands around her feet. She squirmed a bit at first, giggling, and Jasper adjusted his touch so it wouldn't tickle so much.

"Hm. You're very good at that," Bella commented after a few minutes. Her eyes were heavy and her book was discarded on her chest.

"I ran track in high school," Jasper explained. "And my sister danced, so I learned how to take care of feet pretty early in life."

Bella smiled. "I did ballet for all of a day," she said with a giggle.

Jasper looked at her, curious, as he lightly massaged her heel.

"I tripped three other girls within the first ten minutes of my first lesson, and then proceeded to knock myself unconscious on the barre. Needless to say, I wasn't welcomed back at that studio and Renee decided that maybe dance wasn't my thing."

Edward chuckled. "That sounds like you," he teased, setting his score aside and shifting to focus more on their conversation.

"Yes, well, we all weren't designed to be athletes," Bella said. "Or musicians, or artists, or anything else Renee tried to get me to do," she said, laughing quietly.

"What did you end up doing, darlin'?" Jasper asked, finishing up his massage and tucking her feet under his thigh in lieu of a blanket (since they were sitting on top of the covers).

"Girl Scouts," she responded. "I actually managed not to hurt anyone."

Jasper chuckled and Edward tugged on the end of the tendril of hair he was playing with. "What about you guys?" she asked.

"I played baseball until freshman year of high school," Edward said. "Then I decided I wanted to focus on music, so I started doing more stuff with the music department, like the theater, and learning some of the percussion instruments," he explained. "I was a geek."

"Yeah, can't see that," Bella said dryly, reaching up lazily to push his glasses back up his nose. He caught her wrist and pressed a light kiss to her palm before letting her go. "Jazzy?"

"I swam and did track all the way through high school," he explained. "I did solo events, so I was able to mostly train on my own, which suited me fine. It's not that I had anything against team sports, I just didn't want to play any of them. Dad and I used to do some civil war stuff together, too, when he had time." He glanced over at Edward and winked. "I was pretty much a geek, too."

Bella laughed softly. "Well, I was pretty much a book nerd."

"What do you mean _was_, love?" Edward teased. "You still always have your nose in a book or something."

She swatted at his chest from where she lay with her head more or less in his lap. "I was very shy and quiet in high school, and moving to the reservation junior year didn't help that. It was a small school, and everyone knew me through Charlie, but they didn't _know_ me. Books were easier to deal with than people, especially when you're an awkward shy seventeen year old with only vague memories of the people surrounding you."

"Sweetheart, we know all about awkward teenage-hood," Jasper assured her, bending to kiss her forehead.

Their books and other study materials were forgotten as they continued to chat. Jasper learned that Bella didn't start working with yarn until graduate school when she'd gotten so burnt out on reading she needed a new hobby for awhile. After awhile they turned the bed down and snuggled up proper, Bella between Edward and Jasper. Bella dozed off first, nearly mid-sentence, and Edward and Jasper cradled her between them as she muttered quietly before dropping into true sleep. Edward followed, and Jasper let himself be dragged under by the easy rhythm of their breathing and Bella's heartbeat against his chest.

Jasper was warm, and he could feel two sets of steady breathing on either side of him. He frowned without opening his eyes. He'd been on the outside when he'd fallen asleep, he'd thought. He opened his eyes slowly. Edward was asleep on his left side, tucked up close to Jasper as he liked to be when they slept together, his head on Jasper's shoulder with his left leg thrown over the top of Jasper's. But Edward's hand, normally resting on Jasper's chest, was lying on Bella's shoulder. He glanced to his right. Jasper's hand was on her lower back and she was halfway curled into a ball, her head on Jasper's stomach, her right leg crossed over Edward's. They were a tangle of limbs, hair, and clothes, and Jasper found it felt just perfect.

Well, perfect other than his desperate need to piss. Jasper slowly worked his way out from underneath them, tripping over the discarded bedspread when he rounded the bed for the bathroom. He cursed quietly and tossed it back up onto the bed. Jasper took care of business and retraced his steps through the dark room back to the bed.

Bella had wasted no time in Jasper's absence and had migrated toward Edward in her sleep. Jasper stood and watched for a moment; Edward had curled himself around her slightly as she'd nuzzled herself into his chest. He smiled softly before gathering the sheet and blanket that had pooled at the foot of the bed. Jasper draped them lightly over Edward before he climbed in behind Bella, then tugged the covers over all three of them.

"Okay?" Edward asked in a quiet, sleepy voice, his arm coming across Bella's body to rest on Jasper's flank.

"Yeah. Go back to sleep," Jasper answered softly, extending his arm as well so his fingers brushed over Edward's skin.

"Mm," was Edward's mumbled response.

"Shh. Sleepin'," Bella added, shifting her legs a little against Jasper's.

"Sorry, darlin'," Jasper whispered, kissing the back of her head. He shifted a bit to get more comfortable, Bella's body fitting perfectly between him and Edward, her head just under Jasper's chin. After a couple minutes of listening to their slow, easy breathing, Jasper slipped back into sleep.

"Jasper."

"Hm?" he responded to the soft voice calling his name. His arms tightened around the body tucked up against his, and got a quiet giggle in return.

"Not helping, Jas," the voice chided gently. "I need you to let me up, sweetheart."

Bella, his mind finally registered. "Baby, she needs the bathroom," Edward's voice said with a hint of laughter, and warm hands covered Jasper's wrists and he felt his hands being lifted. The warmth tucked against him shimmied away, but was replaced quickly. Jasper sighed softly, inhaling Edward's scent rather than Bella's strawberry and freesia.

"Are you sure I'm the cuddleslut?" Edward asked quietly, his voice washing over Jasper's cheek.

"You're just more vocal about it," Jasper responded with a smile, not opening his eyes as he hugged Edward a bit closer.

"True," Edward agreed. "Sleep well?"

"Mmhm," Jasper hummed. "I've missed this. I've always slept better with someone." He recalled how easily sleep had come with Bella a couple of weeks previous, and sharing a bed, even just to sleep, with Edward had always felt natural.

"Just one more week, baby," Edward promised, "and we'll work something out for our weekends."

Jasper nodded against him and he felt Bella join them in bed, cuddling up to his other side. He draped his arm over her and he felt her kiss his cheek. "What are we working out?" Bella asked.

"Sleeping arrangements," Edward answered. "We're always welcome to stay at mom and dad's on Saturdays," he said.

"You can stay with me next weekend," Bella offered Jasper shyly.

"I'd like that," he agreed, turning to kiss her softly. "We'll just have to figure it out as we go."

Bella tucked her head into the juncture of his neck and shoulder, and he felt her smile against his skin. He hugged her with the arm around her shoulders and rested his cheek against the top of her head. He glanced over at Edward, who was watching them with a fond smile. "What?"

Edward just shook his head, extending his arm across Jasper's body to finger a lock of Bella's hair before resting his hand against her side. "I could get used to this, is all," he commented.

"Which part?" Bella asked, reaching for Edward's hand that was resting against her side and twining their fingers together, resting them on Jasper's stomach.

"The quiet morning cuddle," Edward explained. "Watching you two together. Being us," he said. "This all just feels…"

"Right," Bella whispered, finishing his sentence.

"Yeah," Edward answered.

Jasper knew that they were throwing that phrase around a lot, but it was the best way he could think to put it, and apparently the others did, too. Despite the turmoil that the original thought had caused him, Jasper hadn't felt as centered or at peace as he had over the course of the previous 24-hours with Edward and Bella with him.

They lay there for awhile longer until Edward shifted. "I need coffee," he complained quietly.

Jasper laughed softly and pinched his flank. "Breakfast?"

"Pancakes?" Bella asked hopefully.

"Sure, darlin'," Jasper agreed. "Edward probably knows a place…"

"Yeah, I do," Edward answered.

No one moved. Jasper finally nudged the bodies on either side of him. "If you want coffee and pancakes, we best get out of bed."

"Fine," Edward sighed.

Jasper glanced over at Bella and she was pouting slightly, but her eyes were alight. He kissed her gently. "You, go do whatever girly thing you need to do to get ready." He turned to Edward and kissed him. "You get dressed."

Bella thwapped him across the chest, but squirmed out his arms, grabbing her bag before ducking into the bathroom.

"Who put you in charge?" Edward asked with a smile as he also rolled away.

"You two, apparently, since neither of you wanted to do anything about the lack of caffeine and breakfast foods," Jasper answered as he sat up and scooted to the edge of the bed.

"Oh. Right," Edward answered dryly.

"Get dressed," Jasper said with a roll of his eyes as he rose and dug out clothes of his own.

Bella returned with her bag repacked and dressed in jeans and her hoodie, her face freshly washed and her hair twisted into a complicated looking knot on the back of her head. So Bella wouldn't have to come back to the hotel before she headed back to Forks, they took both cars to breakfast.

Edward led the way and they ended up at the hole in the wall diner where he and Jasper had dinner on their first real date. They piled into a booth near the back of the diner, Bella sitting across from Jasper and Edward. Jasper and Edward both ordered coffee and Bella asked for tea and orange juice.

They were quiet for a few minutes as they waited for the hot drinks to seep into their bodies and they gave their order to the heavy-set waitress.

"Did you have a good weekend, Bella?" Edward asked softly.

She smiled. "I did. I – I'm still a bit overwhelmed by all of this, but…I trust you guys."

Jasper knew how sincere those words were for her; it was incredibly hard to trust people after coming out of a relationship like the one she had with James.

"That's good, but you're in charge here, love," Edward said gently. "We're gonna go at your pace, okay?" He smiled and reached across the table for one of her hands. "We don't want to hurt you, or force you into anything, Bella."

"I know you wouldn't," Bella agreed with a soft smile. "Neither of you is like that. But thank you. Let's just see how things go, okay? Baby steps?" she suggested.

"Whatever you need, darlin'," Jasper agreed.

She smiled her thanks as Edward withdrew his hand. Jasper rested his free hand on Edward's thigh while he sipped his coffee. "What are you doing for the rest of the day?" he asked Bella.

"Grading, lesson plans, putting together my opening welcome speech for the convocation next week," she explained.

"Business as usual," Jasper said with a wink.

"Pretty much," Bella answered with a laugh.

"Such is the life of a teacher," Edward commented, and they shared a laugh as their waitress brought their breakfasts.

Bella and Edward had pancakes, and Jasper had an egg scramble (though he stole a few bites off Edward's plate).

They let Bella pick up the tab because she insisted and neither of them had any willpower against her pout. Together they walked from the restaurant to her car.

"Drive safe," Jasper said, bending to kiss her softly after she'd opened the car and placed her purse inside. "Love you."

Bella beamed. "I love you, too. I'll see you at dinner?"

"Of course," Edward answered, giving her a kiss of his own. He must've said something because she blushed and nodded.

They waited to leave until they watched her pull out of the parking lot.

It was quiet in the car as Edward drove them back to the hotel so they could check out a bit later in the morning. Jasper made sure they had all their belongings packed up and they just relaxed on the bed, reading. Jasper felt Bella's absence already, and he had a feeling Edward did as well, given his similarly subdued attitude.

When checkout time rolled around, Jasper gathered their bags and took them down to the car when Edward checked them out and settled their bill.

Like the ride from breakfast, the trip home started off quietly, Jasper lost in his thoughts. The whole weekend had gone better than he had hoped, but as well as he'd expected. Edward had been right; things had a way of just working themselves out.

"Are you alright?" Edward asked, breaking the silence they'd fallen into.

"Yeah," Jasper answered with a smile. "Just thinking."

"Good thoughts?"

"Yes," Jasper answered, taking Edward's hand and twining their fingers together. "Things went well this weekend."

"They did," Edward agreed. "I told you," he said in a sing-song voice.

Jasper chuckled at his tone. "Yes, you did, baby."

They drove another few minutes in quiet before Edward spoke up again. "Are you going to be okay this weekend?"

"Yes," Jasper said with a nod. "I'll be with Bella." Also knowing that it would be the last time Edward was away for the weekend would be a help.

"You two are good at taking care of each other," Edward observed.

"We all are," Jasper countered. "Though I'm glad she's been around the last few weeks."

"When I wasn't," Edward said quietly.

Jasper smiled and ran his thumb across Edward's knuckles. "Not your fault, babe," Jasper assured him. "It was an opportunity you couldn't pass up and we made it through, more or less," he said somewhat wryly. "I'm proud of you, by the way."

"What for?"

"You were so anxious about having to lead the other two bands. But you did it. You didn't let the other shit get in the way of what you had to do, and you've really grown into that role in the last couple of weeks," Jasper explained.

"You think so?" Edward asked. "I still feel terrified every time I get up in front of the Wind Ensemble."

"You'll get over it," Jasper assured him. "Just like teaching, right? Eventually you settle in and stop being nervous at the beginning of each term."

"I guess," Edward hedged.

"Trust me," Jasper said with a wink.

Edward smiled and rolled his eyes.

At the campus dinner, Jasper and Edward flanked Bella around the table. It wasn't unusual, so no one said anything, but they didn't see the way Bella maintained contact with both of them beneath the table by nudging their ankles with her foot, or the way Edward would rest his hand casually on Bella's thigh.

Jasper mostly behaved; while the Dean was speaking, his hand rested at the base of Bella's neck, his thumb making small circles on her skin, mostly hidden by her hair.

After dinner, Jasper returned to his room to finish up his work for the upcoming week. He felt more settled and rested heading into the beginning of the week than he had since the previous semester had ended. He could sense the light at the end of the long tunnel they'd been in since returning to Forks from their vacation, and Jasper knew part of that was Bella's presence, and the removal of the weight that he'd felt from the pressure of trying to get everything sorted in his own head.

He knew there was still a long road ahead of them, and he didn't expect it to be easy. But just knowing that the three of them were all on the same page made it easier for him to shut off the light and slip into sleep.


	43. Chapter 42: Edward Goes to Idaho

**Thanks as always to the fantastic ladies who continue to beta my work and put up with my neurotic self-doubt. Naelany and wishingforlove rock my socks.**

**Please see the note at the end.**

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Thursday morning came all too quickly for Edward's taste. After the weekend in Port Angeles with Jasper and Bella it had been a bit of a struggle to face having to go away again, and with the bus leaving so early in the morning, it was tough to even want to get out of bed when his alarm went off at 5:00 am.

The bus was leaving at seven, so he reluctantly dragged his ass up and limped into the bathroom to shower. He'd packed the evening before, knowing how hard the morning was going to be. Edward had managed to spend a couple of hours with Jasper and Bella after dinner, but eventually their responsibilities had forced them to part, after exchanging their goodbyes for the weekend. Edward sighed as he stepped under the hot water. He was going to miss them for the four days he'd be gone.

The trip into Port Angeles had gone about as well as he could have expected or hoped. Bella seemed receptive and Jasper hadn't freaked out like Edward had thought he might. It occurred to Edward on the drive home that he was the most emotionally stable of the three of them at the moment. Bella was still coming off her relationship with James and Jasper had his own crisis that he was still wrestling with. Edward was, strangely enough, in the position to be somewhat of the emotional rock, and the thought worried him a bit.

He'd hardly been able to rely on himself over the past several years; the thought that he could be the steady one for two other people to lean on was somewhat shocking. Though he'd felt a bit more steady since he'd met Jasper, balanced, perhaps, he still had volatile mood swings from time to time that Jasper had managed to see him through. But he found that time he spent with both Jasper and Bella he seemed more centered in general.

Edward supposed it was because they made him happy.

He shut off the shower and climbed out, careful to keep himself from slipping on the tile floor. Though he was happy with Jasper, Bella had rounded out his life in a way he'd not expected. They'd been friends for years, and though he'd never denied wanting to sleep with her, she had grown into something much more important over time. She'd never taken his shit, but had been the best friend he'd ever had, until he met Jasper.

Edward dressed as comfortably professional as he could. It was going to be a long day of travel once again, and he needed to be able to move whenever the opportunity came up. Over his Forks Academy polo shirt he'd tugged on a hoodie he'd snagged from Jasper. It was nice having another piece of him, besides the teddy bear, that Edward could travel with.

He was more than ready to be done with travelling for the semester. Edward felt like so much time had already been wasted while he was touring with the bands over the past several weeks, but there wasn't much he could do except try to make it up to Jasper (and Bella) when he had the chance. He thought that perhaps the spring break trip could be a chance for the three of them to travel together; though they'd have to chaperone, it would be worth it to get away as a…well, couple wasn't the right word.

Edward checked to make sure that he had everything one last time and left his bags near the door. He was debating over whether or not he should take everything with him to the dining hall and head to the bus from there, or to stop back by his room after he ate. He had about 45 minutes until the bus would arrive, and he needed to grab coffee at the very least. Edward just wasn't sure that he'd have time to get back to his room and get everything to be at the bus when he wanted.

With a sigh, he grabbed his coat and slung it over the handle on his rolling suitcase. He'd packed his suit bag once again, though he wasn't optimistic that his band would win their competition. However, he couldn't let the students see that by not seeing his garment bag. With his messenger bag over his shoulder, his suit bag clipped to his suitcase, Edward grabbed his suitcase with his right hand and tugged it awkwardly behind him with his cane in his left as he exited his room, locking the door behind him.

He kind of wanted to see Bella and Jasper before he left, but he knew Jasper would be at the gym with Emmett, and Bella wouldn't even be out of bed for another half-hour at the earliest. So he juggled everything and made his way across to the cafeteria, leaving his bags parked in the area where students left their bags in cubbies and negotiated his way through the service area for a hot breakfast, coffee, and a few pieces of fruit to take with him on the bus. He balanced his tray and stepped into the dining area, his body automatically responded to two familiar heads of hair at the regular table.

"Good morning," he greeted them quietly.

Bella smiled sleepily up at him, her hands curled around a mug of tea.

"Mornin'," Jasper said, his smile slightly brighter.

"You're both up early," he said, sliding into the seat open between them.

"I wanted to see you before you left," Bella said quietly, sliding a package over to him. "He agreed to come wake me up at this ungodly hour," she said with a nod at Jasper.

"He's good for that," Edward agreed, kissing her temple. "What's this?" he asked, gesturing at the packet.

"Open it later," Jasper said. "Just something for the bus ride."

"Thanks. You didn't have to."

"We wanted to," Bella said. She yawned hugely and apologized. Edward stretched his arm over the back of her chair and hugged her close. She rested her head on his shoulder and her eyes drooped closed.

Edward laughed fondly and used his free hand to eat his breakfast.

"You'll call us if you need anything?" Jasper asked, one hand on his coffee cup, the other on Edward's thigh under the table.

"Of course, baby," Edward promised quietly. "One more weekend."

Jasper nodded with a small smile. "I know."

Edward ate, Jasper drank his coffee, and Bella dozed lightly. "Jas, do me a favor?"

"Sure, baby."

"Can you grab me a coffee to go?" Edward asked with a grin, motioning toward Bella on his shoulder.

Jasper laughed softly and nodded before rising smoothly.

"Bella, love," Edward said lowly in her ear, giving her a gentle shake.

"Mm?"

"You need to wake up, sweetheart, I have to go in a minute," Edward said.

Bella lifted her head from his shoulder and blinked rapidly, clearing her eyes before turning another sleepy smile on him.

"You'll be okay this weekend?" he asked gently.

"Of course," she assured him. "I have plenty to do to keep busy and Jasper and I entertained."

"Thanks, love," he said softly, but sincerely. "Hopefully we'll have some time next weekend to spend together."

"We'll see," Bella answered. "It may just be a few minutes with everything."

Edward nodded. "That's okay. Sometimes those quiet few moments are worth a lot."

She nodded as Jasper returned. He handed Bella a paper cup with a lid and the tabby end of a tea bag hanging out and passed another to Edward. "Time to go?" He asked quietly.

"Yeah, just about," Edward answered. "Want to walk with me?"

They both nodded. Bella shouldered his messenger bag and Jasper insisted on pulling his luggage along as they walked through the still dark morning to where the bus was parked. The underside bays were already open and the driver was the same that Edward had used for the trip to Yakima.

"I'll see you guys on Sunday," Edward said quietly after Jasper had stowed his suitcase and Edward had taken his bag back from Bella.

Bella nodded and hugged him. "I love you," she said quietly.

"Love you too," Edward answered, kissing the top of her head.

She stepped out of the way and Edward embraced Jasper next. "Take care of yourself," Jasper said quietly, discreetly kissing Edward's pulse point. "Love you."

"You too. On both counts," Edward said with a smile. "Take care of her."

"I will," Jasper promised.

Edward kissed him quickly and released him, taking a step back. "I'll call you guys tonight."

Bella nodded and smiled as Jasper draped his arm over her shoulders. "Okay. Have fun."

Edward nodded and stepped into the bus, dropping his bag into the front seat nearest the door. He watched from the corner of his eye as Jasper slowly guided Bella around to walk her back to her room as Edward turned to speak with the driver.

Once again, Edward was the sole chaperone on the trip, and he went over the itinerary with the driver quickly. They were making several rest stops, including a longer break for lunch, and were hoping to be into Moscow, Idaho by seven in the evening. Hopefully his students remembered and packed plenty of snacks and water (though they'd be able to pick things up along the way).

Edward finally felt like he was settling into the role that had been thrust at him six weeks previous. Professionally, he was above where he wanted to be. He had been content to run the jazz program at the school, and teaching lessons fulfilled a need to do more mentoring of students, with the academic classes providing a more intellectual outlet. He had a feeling when end of term reviews came up, he'd be finding out a bit more about the vacancy that John Anderson had left behind, so he would have a better idea of whether or not he could take on the position.

Of course a lot of that depended on Bella and Jasper as well. If he transitioned completely into the Director of Bands position, he'd have a lot less time. But, he considered as he gazed out the window waiting for his students to show up, it would put them more or less on equal footing, because he figured he'd have closer to a full load of classes, like they did. If Jasper was granted the tenured position, anyway. Edward didn't want to think about what it would mean for them if Jasper was not hired on full time at the school. He knew they'd make something work, but just once, he wanted something to be easy.

After a moment, Edward got off the bus to walk around. He wanted to keep himself moving as much as possible while he had the chance, trying in vain to keep from stiffening up too much. The cold didn't help, but it was better than sitting around and making things worse. He felt better as he moved, knowing that the therapy was working. He knew it had as much to do with Jane as it did with his relationship with Jasper improving his outlook on life, putting him in a better position to benefit from the physical therapy than he'd been three years previous just after the accident, when all he'd been able to focus on was the dark side of things.

His students started arriving and the driver came out of the bus to help them organize their bags and instruments under the bus before they filed on with their back packs and in some cases, pillows and blankets. Edward knew his relationship with Jasper had saved him in many ways; though he hadn't been in quite as dark a place, he'd still had his moments. Bella had been victim to one of those. He had no doubts that the three of them together could truly find some healing. He looked forward to being back on a more normal schedule to see how things would work for them.

As the last of the students trickled in, Edward took roll to make sure he had everyone. The students were largely still bleary eyed and half-asleep as they found seats on the bus. Once again with only twenty students they were mostly able to stretch out to have a pair of seats to themselves.

The first part of the ride was quiet as everyone caught up with sleep. Edward popped in his headphones and relaxed as his students napped, and it was an hour into the trip before he'd remembered Bella's package in his messenger bag.

He pulled it out and carefully opened it in his lap. Edward smiled as he looked at the contents. She'd packaged up a bunch of snacks and treats and other things; several bags of M&Ms, a few granola bars, a packet of gum, a small rough pencil sketch of Bella and Jasper together that Alice had drawn, and things that just made him feel loved and made him smile. He wrapped the packet back up and slipped it back into his bag, making a note to send her a thank you message later, as he reclined and closed his eyes, letting a light sleep fall over him.

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I know it was a baby chapter, but I just wanted to give us a chance to check in with Edward.

If the week goes well (meaning, I finish the chapter I'm working on by Friday-ish) I may post again this week. If not, it'll be Tuesday. I'm not making any promises; the last chapter I wrote was very difficult for me to get through, so I'm a bit behind where I'd like to be.


	44. Chapter 43: Homecomings

**Thank you as always to the fantastic beta team.**

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After Edward boarded the bus, Jasper wrapped his arm around Bella's slim shoulders and started walking her back toward her dorm. She sniffled quietly and he hugged her. "Are you okay?"

Bella nodded, turning to look up at him. Her nose and cheeks were red and her eyes were bright. "Just cold," she assured him, still clutching the tea he'd brought her before they'd left the cafeteria.

"We'll get you inside and warmed up. Are you going back to bed, or meeting us for breakfast?" He asked, lightly teasing. They'd just gotten something warm to drink while they'd waited for Edward.

She smacked his stomach lightly with the back of her hand. "I'll be there. A shower should wake me up," Bella answered.

They walked quietly for a couple of minutes before she spoke again. "What are you doing tonight?"

"I've got an appointment after dinner, and then history club. Why?"

Bella shrugged. "Just wondering."

Jasper wasn't convinced. "How about I'm all yours tomorrow night," Jasper offered. "Between the two of us, I'm sure we can convince Alice we don't need to go out."

Bella laughed quietly and nodded. "Okay."

He kissed the top of her head as they approached her building. "Alright darlin'. I'll see you in a little bit."

Bella kissed him softly and he waited until she was inside and up the stairs before he began the jog back across to his own room. Jasper supposed he had time to do a brief workout at the gym, but decided against it; he'd make it up on Friday.

Instead, he jumped into the shower before Emmett returned (from either Rosalie's or the gym), and dressed professionally casual for the day in dark brown chinos, and a light weight wool sweater that Alice had insisted he needed on one of her shopping trips. He was rapidly growing out of room for clothes; he could swear that his wardrobe had more than doubled since he'd moved to Forks.

Jasper decided to take advantage of the extra time that skipping his workout had allotted and headed back to the dining hall with his bag to get ahead on some prep work and finish up the paperwork he hadn't done the night before. He grabbed his breakfast and another cup of hot coffee and made his way to the regular table. He was the first one there and he got the homework out that he needed to grade and worked while he ate.

"Morning, Jasper!" Alice greeted him cheerfully. "You're here early," she said as she slid into a seat across from him.

"Edward left early and Bella and I saw him off," Jasper responded. "I thought I'd get some work done while I had a little time."

"Oh, that's right," Alice remembered, stirring her granola and yogurt together in a bowl. "Last time, huh?"

"Yeah," Jasper answered, stacking his papers together and shoving them back into his bag as he saw Bella come out of the service area, knowing the others wouldn't be too far behind. "It'll be good to have him back on the weekends. He's got to be exhausted."

Alice grinned. "And you're lonely."

Jasper felt his ears heat up slightly but he shrugged with a grin as he held Bella's chair out for her. "Not so much anymore." He caught Alice's smile in the corner of his eye as he turned to smile at Bella. She looked slightly more awake with her hair loose down her back except the sides she'd pulled back off her face.

"Morning," Bella said quietly, offering a smile to Jasper. He assumed that she'd walked over with Alice.

"Again," Jasper said with a grin.

"That didn't count," Bella groused. "It was not an hour sensible people consider being conscious."

Alice giggled and Jasper laughed, leaning over to kiss the top of her head. "I'll let you sleep in on Saturday, how's that?" he offered.

Bella pouted. "Can't. But thanks for the offer, Jazzy," she said sweetly.

"Does that mean you're going to get me up early to help you?" he asked, reaching for his coffee.

"Nope," Bella answered. "I have an early appointment before I put you to work helping me set things up for the conference next week. I won't be back until around eleven."

"You just tell me where to be and when," Jasper agreed as Emmett and Rosalie joined them at the table.

"Morning," Emmett greeted everyone as he sat with his plate of eggs, bacon and toast.

"Did Edward get off alright this morning?" Rosalie asked as she popped the top off her yogurt.

Emmett snorted and snickered and Rose thwapped him on the back of the head.

"Yes," Bella answered quietly, a blush spreading across her cheeks.

Jasper bit back a laugh at Emmett's innuendo and rested his hand on Bella's shoulder instead, his thumb making small circles against her sweater. "They hadn't left yet, but we saw Edward to the bus," Jasper explained.

"When's he back?" Rosalie asked.

"Late on Sunday," Jasper answered.

"We should have a party!" Alice decided, starting to bounce slightly.

"No," Jasper and Bella answered together.

"Oh, come on," Alice whined. "We could keep it small? I mean, it'll be late and a school night, but we could have a cake and maybe a couple of drinks?" Her green eyes grew wide and her bottom lip began to jut out just a bit.

Jasper hoped Bella had a stronger backbone than he did, because he was pretty much guaranteed to cave at the emergence of the pout. "Alice…"

"It would be a nice gesture," Rosalie put in.

"And hey, cake," Emmett said with a bright smile.

Jasper looked to Bella, who appeared to be waffling. "No, sweetheart, you have to stay strong and resist the temptation to fall to evil," he stage whispered.

"Jasper!" Alice scolded through a laugh.

Bella giggled. "He'd appreciate it."

"He's going to be exhausted," Jasper argued, but he knew he was facing a losing battle.

"Please, Jazzy?" Bella asked quietly.

He sighed. "Fine." He had a feeling he was never going to be able to deny Bella anything, but he wasn't really surprised by that.

Bella smiled brightly and kissed his cheek and Alice just beamed. "I'll take care of everything," Alice promised. "I'll keep it small, just us, and we won't go too late."

Jasper nodded, knowing it was just better to let her and Bella have at it. Alice and Bella fell into talking about what they could do on such short notice and it wasn't long before they were shrugging into coats and heading to classes for the day.

Classes went easily, and Bella left another gift from Edward on Jasper's desk when he ran out to get lunch for them. He returned to find a small sachet of mint, coffee, and ginger candy alongside a note from Edward, reminding him that he was loved and being thought of. Bella also showed him the text she'd received from Edward thanking them both for the small care package they'd put together the night before.

After classes, Jasper and Bella went to dinner together, and he walked her home before he left campus for his weekly session with Dr. Jones. Jasper told her about the events of the previous weekend, how they'd talked and agreed to take things slowly and let Bella control things (after filling Dr. Jones in about Bella's recent history with James), and that he was making progress dealing with things without feeling the need to run away. Dr. Jones seemed pleased that things had gone well and that Jasper was handling things okay.

He made a quick stop for a hot drink on his way back to campus for the history club meeting, making it just in time for the beginning of the meeting. The students easily led the discussion and then voted on the next book to be read. The group decided to split in two, each side taking a text with an opposing view on a subject for more interesting and in depth discussion. Jasper had figure out exactly how he was going to read two novels when he was having issues finding time to read the one.

Jasper made it back to his room just as quiet hours were descending, so he walked the halls reminding students to close their doors or turn down music. Back to his room, he closed and locked the door to the hall behind him and quickly changed into more comfortable clothes before settling down to work on the pile of homework that seemed to have grown exponentially since Valentine's Day.

He graded about half of the stack before the dry burning of his eyes convinced him it was time to call it a night and try to sleep. Jasper had discovered sometime in the week after returning from Port Angeles that if he played Edward's piano music quietly on his iPod it was enough to allow him to fall asleep more easily, even if he didn't stay asleep for long stretches at a time. Bella had suggested a body pillow for him to curl around at night, but he'd dismissed it out of hand. He might have to reconsider.

After setting the iPod on the dock and setting it to repeat before turning the sleep timer for an hour, Jasper shut off the lights and closed his eyes with a quiet sigh of relief. The bed was still too big and too small at the same time, but his body relaxed into it as a haunting lullaby played from the speakers and he drifted off to sleep.

Jasper woke up a few times during the night, which was usual for him, and it took him awhile to get back to sleep each time, but when his alarm went off on Friday morning, he woke feeling rested, and dressed for the gym. He met Emmett in the hallway and they set off at an easy jog across campus. They did a cardio loop together before taking turns spotting each other in the weight room as they bantered back and forth.

Bella seemed quiet at breakfast (even for her), pushing her food around on her plate.

"Are you okay, sweetheart?" he asked softly when she'd appeared to be staring off into space, looking paler than usual.

She offered a weak smile. "Migraine," she answered simply. "My good drugs are taking awhile to kick in."

He kissed the top of her head softly and scooted his chair a bit closer so she could lean against him. "Do you want me to call in a sub for you and take you home?"

"No, I'll be okay soon," she answered, her eyes closed. The rest of their party looked sympathetic and were keeping their voices down.

He didn't want to push her when she wasn't feeling well, so he took her at her word and quietly ate his breakfast, listening to Alice's plans for the small party she and Bella had planned the night before. Bella sighed softly and relaxed a bit beside him after a little while. When it was time to leave, Jasper gathered Bella's plates and tray with his own and roused her gently. "Sweetheart, it's time to go."

"Mm? Okay," she responded. Jasper helped her up and carried their trays to the carousel and they walked slowly together to the humanities building. By the time they reached their office Bella seemed a bit more herself.

"Thanks, Jazzy," she said, tiptoeing up to kiss his cheek.

"For what, darlin'?" He asked as he shed his coat onto his chair and gathered his things for his first class.

"Just for being you," she said with a smile, grabbing her stack of materials from her desk and ducking out of the room.

Jasper shook his head as he walked to the stairwell and to his first class. He had a feeling he was never going to fully understand women in general or Bella in particular.

There were no problems or issues in any of his classes and for a Friday, the day passed fairly quickly. Edward left him a voice mail and he sounded tired but said that things were going alright. At the end of the day, Jasper packed up all the paperwork he'd need for the weekend and escorted Bella to the dining hall.

"Are you feeling better, darlin'?" Jasper asked as they walked. He'd noticed that she hadn't eaten much lunch, but she'd kept refilling her tea mug between classes.

"Mostly," she answered with a soft smile.

Jasper nodded and draped his arm lightly over her shoulders. "Anything I can do?"

"Not for another twenty years or so," Bella remarked dryly to Jasper's confusion. She shook her head. "I do this every month, Jas. It sucks, but I'm used to it."

The proverbial light bulb clicked on over his head and he nodded. "Okay. If you think of something, though…"

Bella laughed softly. "I'll let you know, Jazzy. For now, they'd better have something chocolate at the dessert counter."

Jasper laughed softly and kissed the top of her head as they reached the cafeteria. Of course he'd noticed, through sharing an office with Bella, that she'd have really bad headaches, but he'd never associated them with a particular point in the month before. There was a lot he knew he was going to need to get figured out about having any kind of relationship with a woman.

They shared a tray as they got food. Bella made toast and had a bowl of what looked like chicken and rice soup. Jasper made a small salad and opted for a few slices of pizza. Bella also grabbed her dessert while she had a chance at what was labeled as 'fudgy cheesecake,' before the students (or Emmett) hit the dessert line.

Everyone else (save Edward, of course) was waiting at their table. Bella sat between Emmett and Jasper, leaving an open chair between him and Alice at the round table.

"So, plans for tonight?" Alice offered.

"Not for us," Bella answered for herself and Jasper. "I'm still not feeling great and Jasper promised me a night of movies and quiet times."

"But-" Alice started, a pout beginning to form.

"You can let me have her for one Friday night, Alice," Jasper chided with a smile. "We're giving you Sunday."

Alice seemed to consider that for a moment, licking something off her fork. "Alright," she agreed. "But," she said, pointing her fork at Jasper. "You're letting me do something for your birthday in two weeks."

"You may have to fight Edward and me on that one," Bella said softly with a small smile.

"Meh," Alice said. "You guys are no fun at all."

Everyone laughed, but Alice let it go with a huff, though Jasper could easily tell she was more amused than anything.

After dinner, Jasper walked Bella and Alice back to their dorm so Bella could pack a small bag for the night. Alice dragged him into her side of the suite while Bella packed, and once they were out of sight, Alice threw herself into Jasper's arms with a quiet noise that sounded something like "squee!"

"I'm so happy for all of you," Alice said quietly in Jasper's ear as he returned the embrace. "I would've hated to have to resort to something to get you three to see what's been right in front of you."

Jasper smiled and kissed the top of her head. "Thanks, darlin'," he said softly. "How long have you known?" He knew the three of them weren't being exactly subtle, but Alice also just i_knew_/i things.

Alice hugged him and then let him go, and he set her back on her feet. "Since Halloween, hence the matching costumes," she said with a smirk. "But really, since just after the term started. There's a new closeness there," she said thoughtfully.

"We talked last week," he told her. "But we haven't…well, with Edward out of town we're taking things slowly," he explained, trying to be somewhat discreet.

Alice just nodded understandingly with a bright smile. "It'll all work out, Jazzy. Trust me."

He nodded his thanks as Bella appeared in the threshold of the connecting door. She'd changed into more comfortable clothes with a pair of lined boots, and her hair had been pulled into a knot on the back of her head.

"Got everything, sweetheart?" he asked.

"Think so. Not like I can't come back, right?" she teased lightly. She gave Alice a brief hug and said they'd get the last party details worked out at the family dinner the next night.

Jasper lifted Bella's bag off her shoulder over her protests. He took her hand as they made their way back across campus to his dorm. He ushered her into his room once they were inside, hoping to keep the student-run gossip mill from latching onto him and Bella as a couple (though worse things had been said about him, he doubted Edward or Bella would appreciate it).

"Get comfy," he said, settling her bag on his table. "I'm going to change. Help yourself to what's in the kitchen; Emmett won't mind," he said with a grin. He grabbed a clean pair of sweat pants and an undershirt from the bureau and went into the bathroom to change.

When he came back out he saw that Bella had settled on top of his comforter, legs folded up underneath herself (what had been called in his youth 'Indian style' but they weren't allowed to call it that anymore), a bottle of water next to her on the bed, some yarn on her other side, and three dvds laid out in front of her. She smiled up at him, and he returned it automatically. "Can't choose?" he asked as he dropped his dirty clothes into the full hamper and reached for the slippers she'd made him for Christmas.

"Yeah," she said.

Jasper sat next to her on the bed, pulling on the shoes. "Well, pick one to start and we'll go from there."

Bella thought for a moment. "This one," she said, handing over a comedy.

"Good choice." Jasper shifted to get the laptop set up and turn out the lights, and he and Bella rearranged themselves on the twin sized bed.

They snuggled up together, Jasper sitting up against the wall at the head of the bed, Bella curled up against his chest between his outstretched legs. He played with a tendril of her hair while she worked with some yarn and they watched the movie on his laptop.

When the movie ended, Jasper closed the lid on his computer and they cuddled together in the small bed. "I need to tell you something, Bella," Jasper said quietly into the dark.

"Oh-kay," Bella said, sounding apprehensive.

"It's nothing bad. Well, it is, I guess, but not like you're thinking. Shit," he swore quietly, rolling his eyes at himself. "I need to tell you a bit more about my past."

"Oh," Bella said on a quiet sigh. The tension that had suddenly filled the room was gone as quickly as it had settled.

"I've only ever told Edward the whole story," he started quietly. "How much do you know about Don't Ask Don't Tell?"

He felt her shrug. "Not much. Just that it's the policy that discourages people from disclosing their sexual orientation in military service."

"Yeah, pretty much," Jasper said. One of his hands slipped under the edge of her tank top and he caressed her skin lightly. "I was eighteen when I went into the Corps," he explained. "When I was posted at Camp Lejeune I caught the eye of another Marine, Maria. She stalked me, and set me up when I was on leave, and caused me to fall under suspicion under DADT. I was discharged because of it." It still wasn't the whole story, but it was enough for her to get the picture.

"Jasper, that's horrible," Bella breathed.

He kissed the top of her head. "Yeah. It was a very rough time for me. My mama had just died six months before, so I didn't have anywhere to go, really. I went back to Texas for lack of anywhere else, and buried myself in school once I got started. I had causal hookups when I wanted them, but never stayed in a relationship. There was a guy, Ethan," he said. "But he was a lot like James, and I shut him out of my life before it could get bad. You and Edward are the only serious healthy relationship I've ever had."

"Jas, sweetheart," she said softly, her voice thick. She lifted her head from his chest and he saw tears brimming in her eyes. "I'm so sorry."

"What are you sorry for, darlin'?" He asked.

"For what you've been through," she whispered. "I …I've been hurt, but not like that," she said, laying her head back down. "Now I know why Edward asked me to look after you while he was gone, so you didn't feel like you'd been left behind."

Jasper hugged her close. "I have issues with being abandoned," he confessed quietly. "Edward's little notes and things have been a nice reminder for me the last couple weeks. I'm trying to get that worked out with a therapist."

"Is that where you were last night?"

Jasper nodded. "Every Thursday between dinner and history club."

"Saturday mornings," Bella said softly.

"Sweetheart?" he asked, confused by her random response.

"I've been seeing someone since Halloween," Bella admitted softly. "I hadn't told anyone because I didn't want anyone to worry."

"Bells, we're always going to worry because we love you," Jasper chided gently. "You have to know that none of us would have looked down on you if you'd have told us."

"I know," Bella said on a sigh. "It was just something that I wanted to handle on my own."

"It was your choice, but I hope you know that you didn't have to," Jasper said.

Bella nodded, her cheek rubbing against Jasper's t-shirt. "I know," she whispered.

"Okay." He kissed the top of her head. "Is it working for you?"

"I think so," she said quietly. "I've learned a lot about myself in the last few months. I blamed myself for my parents' divorce for the longest time, and she's really helped me understand why I felt that way and how it affected my relationships as an adult. If Edward hadn't asked me for Valentine's Day and the weekend after, I probably would have waffled on telling you guys about my feelings for weeks, if ever," she confessed quietly, and Jasper felt the heat of her blush through his thin t-shirt.

"James made you feel loved," Jasper mused quietly, remembering how he'd felt with Darryl even after the lies and abuse had started.

"Yeah," Bella said softly. "Alice has dressed me since I've known her, so when he started telling me what to wear, I thought it was because he honestly had better taste than I did. I didn't realize at the time that he was trying to show off my – assets – to everyone around him. I never recognized his control over me because I thought it was just his gruff way of showing me affection."

"Did he never hold you? Hold your hand, or just touch you for comfort?" Jasper asked gently, wondering how that control could have been mistaken for comfort. His and Darryl's (and later Ethan) relationship had been volatile, with much more violence than subtle ways of controlling each other.

"No. You know that first night at dinner," Bella reflected "you held my chair for me. You took my hand when we split up after dinner," she recalled, and he could hear the smile in her small voice. "It was the first time I'd felt respected in a very long time," she confessed. "James…" she trailed off, taking an unsteady breath.

Jasper resumed tracing patterns on the soft skin of her back.

"James was never really physically affectionate," she continued after a minute. "I guess that's why it was so easy to be with you and sometimes Edward; you particularly are very physically open with me. Anyway. He was never rough with me, but sex was always fairly rote; there were things he wanted and expected, and what I needed was always a secondary concern, it seemed. I wasn't unfulfilled," she whispered, and Jasper felt the heat against his chest again. "But there were things I couldn't ask for."

"What kinds of things?" Jasper asked without thinking.

"Uhm." Bella fidgeted a bit against him. "Let's say I was the giver of oral sex, but never a receiver."

"Ah," Jasper breathed with a nod, continuing to gently run his fingers over her back. In that, he was going to have to ask Edward for a bit of guidance, if their relationship developed into that; he enjoyed giving oral, to Edward at least, so he wasn't completely turned off by the idea.

"It was another way to keep me controlled," Bella said, shifting back to a comfortable position against his chest. "I understand that now. The casual intimacy that I've always had with the Cullen family, and Edward in particular, was always a difficult issue for James and I. I guess it's a good thing James never saw the two of us together," she said thoughtfully. She turned her face up to Jasper again to smile softly. "You've just always felt so comfortable to be with, and so free with your touch."

"I know what it was like to be without human contact," Jasper admitted softly. "It's been a very long time since I was able to be that way with someone, and I guess a part of me figured you were safe," he said with a sheepish smile. "Especially once I showed interest in Edward. I think I knew that we'd be able to share that comfort with no expectations, and you never shied away from me."

"That was it exactly," Bella confessed. "I knew you were safe, and I was so desperate for something other than words."

Jasper hummed his agreement. "I'm glad I could be there for you when you needed it."

Bella smiled up at him again. "I think that's one of the things that made me love you," she spoke in a quiet tone. "You never demanded anything, but you gave everything I needed. Even when some of this has been uncomfortable, you considered my feelings, too. I didn't want to love you, because I couldn't come between you and Edward the way I thought I'd come between my parents."

"But we don't always control who we love," Jasper whispered.

"Yeah," Bella agreed in a soft voice.

Jasper curled his fingers around Bella's hand when she took it. He raised them to his mouth and kissed the back of hers softly. "I'm glad you came to Port Angeles last weekend."

"Me too," Bella said. "It felt good to talk through things, and to know that you and Edward are both okay with this."

"We are," he assured her again.

She smiled and rested her head back against his chest and Jasper slid his free hand up into her hair and stroked through it lightly. Bella sighed contentedly.

"Ready for sleep, sweetheart?"

"Mm. Yeah," she said, burrowing her face a bit more into his chest as her body gave a shiver.

"What time do you need to be up for your appointment?" he asked as he continued to lightly run his fingers through her wavy hair.

"Nine. I should be back around 11:30, if you want to meet me for brunch?" she offered, her voice already sounding somewhat sleepy.

"Sure, darlin'. I'll make sure you're up in time," he assured her.

"Thanks, Jazzy."

He kissed the top of her head again, and once she'd drifted off, he reached above and behind him to set the alarm, and let himself be lulled to sleep by her warmth and quiet breathing.

Jasper heard the alarm sound, but it shut off before he could reach above him to silence it. The warm body pressed against his chest shifted, and lips pressed against his own. When Bella tried to get up, Jasper hugged her. "Mornin'," he greeted her, his voice thick and rough with sleep.

"Good morning. I need to shower. Go back to sleep," she said, kissing him again, and he let her go, turning over onto his side. It surprised him how easily she seemed to rise, but then it was later than she got up during the school week, so maybe those two extra hours had improved the status of her wake up.

The pillow he wrapped his arms around smelled like her shampoo. Jasper wasn't able to get back to sleep, so he just lay there, turning his iPod on after a couple minutes of silence. He didn't bother to get out of bed, though; he stretched leisurely under the comforter, his feet hanging over the edge of the bed.

Bella returned after a while, dressed in jeans and a sweater, her long hair parted down the middle, still wet. She perched on the edge of the bed near Jasper's feet and he turned so he could watch as she started to put her hair into two long braids on either side of her head. She fastened each with a small tie, and he couldn't help but smile as she turned to him with her legs tucked up under her, looking like a teenager at a sleepover.

Jasper sat up, pulling his legs toward him, and reached over to tug lightly on the end of one of the braids. "Cute," he said.

Bella shrugged. "It keeps my hair out of my face, and it's going to be a long day." She leaned in and kissed him softly. "I've got to get going. I'll call you when I'm back on campus for brunch?"

"Sure, darlin," he answered lazily.

"See you later," she said softly with a smile, sliding from the bed and tugging on her boots before she grabbed her purse and let herself out.

Jasper flopped back into the bed. He laid there for a moment before he dragged himself up, changed, and headed to the gym for a swim. Jasper kept his workout at a leisurely pace, not wanting to punish his body or run from anything, but just give himself a good stretch and clear his head. The change in his attitude since working things out with Bella was somewhat of a surprise to Jasper; he didn't think of her as a substitute for Edward, but over the previous week she'd kept him (and Edward too, to an extent) from backsliding into a withdrawal from everyone to cope with things. The weekend hadn't seemed such a bleak prospect with her around.

He still wasn't totally sure about a physical relationship between them, though he'd given it a lot of thought over the course of the week since returning from Port Angeles. There was no denying that she was a beautiful woman, but the only times he'd found himself aroused with her were in situations where it'd have been hard not to be. But he didn't want to push anything for either of them. He was worried that, despite the therapy she'd been seeking since Halloween that if he made the first move it would be damaging, but he didn't want her to feel rejected if she initiated something and nothing happened. It was something else he was going to maybe need to talk to Edward about.

Finished with his swim, Jasper hauled himself from the pool, grabbing the towels he'd left on the deck. He wrapped one around his waist and used the other in his hair as he walked into the locker room where he'd left his sweats. He jogged back to his room to shower and dress in jeans, an undershirt covered by a green button down shirt, and a pull over fleece purchased by Alice. It was comfortable and warm, since he had a feeling they'd be spending a lot of the day in their office, and the heat was usually turned down for the weekend.

Jasper packed up the schoolwork he'd still not gotten around to grading (and he really needed to finish before the first term papers were due in two weeks) and shouldered his messenger bag with his laptop and made his way out to the dining hall. Bella hadn't called yet, but Jasper figured he could get a start on his work while he waited. It was overcast as usual, but it hadn't started raining yet, and Jasper made it to the cafeteria without having to get out his umbrella. He got his food and made his way through to the seating area, and found a table near a window and waited.

He didn't have to wait long, as Bella appeared after just a few minutes with her own tray and sat down across from him at the small square table. Her eyes were red-rimmed and she was flushed, but had a small smile in place. "Oh, I was going to call you," she recalled as she sat.

"No worries," he assured her. "Everything okay?"

She shrugged as she poked at her omelet with her fork. "It was fine," she said sounding non-committal.

"Sweetheart?" he prompted, reaching across the small table to put his hand over hers.

She smiled weakly. "No, really. I'm always like this when I get back; it's hard sometimes to deal with what came up."

"Okay," he said with a nod, understanding. "If you wanna talk, though."

"Thanks, Jazzy." She squeezed his hand and he pulled it back across the table.

"So, what's the plan for today?" he asked.

"Just some last minute things. I need to finish my speech and make nametags and check on the books the authors have sent and get them sorted, those kinds of things," Bella said. "Hopefully it won't take more than a few hours. I'm looking forward to spending time with Esme this evening."

"Oh?" Jasper asked.

"I'm going to help with dinner and make some cookies," Bella said with a smile. "One of the only things I don't like about living in the dorms is not really being able to cook as much as I'd like, and it helps me relax a bit."

"Well then, we'd best get a move on," Jasper said with a grin, gesturing at her plate. Just because his coping activities were solitary didn't mean everyone's were, and he knew Esme would be just as glad to spend the time with her 'daughter' as Bella was looking forward to it.

When they'd finished eating, Jasper gathered their trays and dishes, and after they were on the rack to be cleaned, they set out for their office. The weather had still held off, so though it was damp, there was no actual rain falling, but Bella had tugged on a beanie and a pair of fingerless gloves that matched her peacoat, while Jasper was forced to shove his hands into the pockets of his fleece.

The Humanities building was quiet when they entered, and most of the lights were off. When they got to their office, the first thing Bella did after taking off her coat and gloves (leaving her beanie on, Jasper noted) was get the kettle switched on while Jasper hooked his computer back up at his desk.

"Where would you like me to start, sweetheart?" Jasper asked once everything was booted back up.

"Nametags?" she asked sheepishly.

"Sure," Jasper said with a half shrug, accepting the sheaf of papers with names and schools, as well as the box of blank nametags to be printed. He settled in and called up the appropriate programs to do a merge document and got to work. He slipped his headphones into the jack and opened iTunes, turning down the volume, but finding a good working groove.

"Thank you," Bella said softly, leaving his mug with fresh coffee at his elbow and kissing his temple.

They worked quietly for awhile, Jasper looking up every so often to see Bella mumbling to herself, tapping a pencil against her forehead with her computer up and running in front of her. When Jasper had finished the merge he checked it over, then sent the job down to the printer in the office on the floor below. Bella had likewise put her headphones on, and since she'd seemed to hit her stride, he didn't disturb her as he left to go load the printer with the tags.

By the time Jasper returned fifteen minutes later, it appeared things weren't going as well as he'd thought. Bella was glaring at her computer and muttering under her breath. He left the nametags on his desk and reached into his drawer for the emergency chocolate stash he kept on hand, and moved to stand behind Bella. He set the chocolate bar to her right and lightly rested his hands on her shoulders, gently working small circles with his fingers until she relaxed a bit.

"Problems?" he asked quietly.

She sighed and sat back in her chair, cutting off the massage, but resting her head against Jasper's torso. "I don't know why I bother to write these things. They sound so…cheesy," she muttered.

"Can you wing it?" Jasper asked. "Make some notes for the highlights, but just get up and speak naturally?" Bella was shy and reserved by nature, so he doubted it, but it was worth a try.

"Yeah, maybe," she muttered. "I mean – I know what I want to say, I just don't know how to say it."

"So leave it for a bit and help me start to get these books sorted out," he said with a wave toward the pile of boxes that had taken up residence in the space between their desks. He gave her shoulders another brief squeeze and stepped back so she could rise.

"What are we doing with these?" he asked.

Bella knelt on the floor, and then sat back on her heels. "Each of the authors sent a few dozen books to be available for sale. We need to make sure they're all accounted for and sort them out; some of them have the same publisher and may be mixed up in boxes."

Jasper nodded. "How many authors?"

"Six," Bella answered, naming them off quickly.

"Okay." Jasper settled onto the floor and reached for a box. He started sorting into stacks, and after a moment, Bella jumped up with an "Oh!" and rushed to her desk to start typing again. Jasper laughed softly and continued to get the books sorted out. Bella kept typing behind him and he eventually had all the books sorted and back into boxes, clearly labeled so they'd be easily set up the next Friday evening before things started Saturday morning.

Bella was smiling at her desk, so Jasper returned to his and pulled out the homework he needed to finish grading and get posted into his grade book until she took a break and could point him toward another task.

"Done!" Bella declared into the quiet of the room.

Jasper chuckled, looking up from the worksheet he was correcting. "Yay."

Bella stuck her tongue out at him with a giggle.

"Anything else we need to do?" He asked, glancing at the clock on his computer. It was getting into mid-afternoon.

"Mm." Bella stretched her arms up over her head as she thought. "Nope. Aimee should be able to do everything that's left during her regular hours next week," she said. The department assistants were discouraged from working overtime if possible, Jasper knew, which was how he'd been nominated to help Bella with a few of the easier tasks.

"Okay. Ready to go?" he asked.

"Let me just check my messages and get everything shut down," Bella said.

They both took one last look through email and Jasper shut down his laptop, packing it and the remainder of the homework back up to dump in his room.

Esme greeted them at the house with hugs and smiles. Because of the trip to Port Angeles, they'd missed the family dinner the week before, and Jasper knew she was looking forward to having everyone back under her roof once a week again, when Edward's trips were over.

Jasper barely had time to return the greeting and kiss Esme on the cheek before she was dragging Bella off to the kitchen while Carlisle laughed quietly from his seat on the sofa.

"The women have abandoned us," Carlisle said as Jasper dropped into one of the chairs with a laugh.

"Are they sure that's a smart idea?" Jasper teased and Carlisle saluted him with his glass.

Jasper settled back to watch the game with Carlisle, and Emmett and Rose arrived a short time later. They joined Jasper and Carlisle, and the game was turned down as they started talking. Jasper smiled his thanks when Bella brought him a cup of coffee and she perched on the arm of his chair while she joined in the conversation. There was flour on her jeans, but she looked happy and more relaxed than he'd seen her in awhile.

Alice arrived just before Esme called them for dinner, and they settled around the table chattering and eating. Esme and Bella had made a chocolate trifle for dessert and they sat around and relaxed for some time after before everyone started calling it a night.

Jasper and Bella walked back to his dorm arm in arm, the bag of cookies that Esme insisted they take in Jasper's free hand. Back in his room, he helped Bella out of her coat and turned to hang it on the corner of the closet.

As he turned back around, she stepped up to him, and placed one hand square in the middle of his chest. She kissed him, hesitantly at first. Jasper's left arm supported her lower back, as he lifted her up slightly to meet his height. Bella seemed encouraged by the action and she skimmed her tongue against his lips and he parted them for her. She made a quiet sound low in her throat as she deepened the kiss.

Bella tasted of the chocolate dessert Esme had served, and a hint of the tea she'd had instead of coffee. Her hands slipped under Jasper's shirt, and he felt her palms flat against his belly, sliding up toward his chest. Her hands slipped back down towards Jasper's waist as he slowly bent, and set her back on her feet on the floor. His right hand brushed against her cheek as he broke the kiss.

She opened her eyes, and though she was smiling, Jasper could see a hint of anxiety in her features, hiding under the blush spreading across her face. He kissed her again tenderly, then trailed his lips lightly up her cheeks to her ear. "You're gorgeous," he whispered. He pressed his lips to the soft skin behind her ear and nuzzled her lightly with his nose, smiling softly when he heard her breath catch, and her fingers tensed slightly against his stomach, her hands still under his shirt.

He felt Bella's fingers to go work at the buttons on his shirt as he started pressing kisses down the column of her neck and throat to the small amount of exposed skin of her collarbone that her sweater revealed. Jasper kissed the hollow of her throat, breathing her scent. When he felt her push at the lapels of his shirt, he stood up straight so she could ease it from his shoulders, leaving him in his thin undershirt.

Jasper grinned as he reached for the hem of her sweater. "Tit for tat, sweetheart," he teased

She laughed softly and blushed, but raised her arms so he could lift the sweater from her body, revealing the tank top with thin straps she'd had on underneath that didn't conceal the slightly wider straps of her matching brassiere. Bella crossed her arms across self-consciously across her stomach and ducked her head, but her braids prevented her from hiding behind the curtain her hair usually provided. Jasper gently took her hands in his and led her across his small room to the bed.

Jasper sat on the edge and Bella stood between his legs, looking down at him slightly with a grin. "This only goes as far as you want it to," he said quietly, skimming his hands up her sides, then back down to settle at her hips. The fingertips of one hand slipped under the edge of her thin tank and caressed the soft skin hidden beneath.

"You get a say, too, Jazzy," Bella said before kissing him again. One of her hands threaded into his hair and she tugged lightly, which Jasper didn't mind.

Bella's lips were warm and soft against Jasper's, and once again he parted his lips for her. His hands slid slightly further up her top and he stopped when his thumbs hit the seam of her bra, and he ran the pad of his thumb along the underside of the fabric. Bella shivered and whimpered quietly into the kiss, pressing herself closer to Jasper.

Jasper felt his body respond to the heat of Bella's pressed against him. He slipped one hand behind her back and pulled her up even closer, the thin barrier of their undershirts providing a little bit of a reminder of restraint between them.

Bella broke the kiss, her breathing slightly ragged, her lips swollen, eyes bright. Her hands drifted back down and tugged at the bottom of the tank-style undershirt Jasper was wearing. "Will you take this off?" she asked shyly.

Jasper nodded and reached to lift it over his head, just as Bella did the same with her thin tank, leaving her in a pretty blue bra. Jasper was treated to the view of her pale, flat stomach, the waistband of her jeans hanging from her hips. Bella blushed as he looked at her, and he laughed quietly as he saw that the flush extended well past the view he was normally afforded.

He dropped his undershirt on the floor, and Bella reached out to trace one of the scars that littered his chest and back. She looked at him curiously.

"Training accident," he answered quietly, reaching for her again. "Don't cover yourself up," he urged her in a whisper; he could almost see her desire to cross her arms over herself again. "You're beautiful, Bella," he said reverently.

She shook her head, causing her braids to swing.

"Yes," he repeated with a smile. He reached up and tugged lightly on the end of one, and she smiled. Jasper kissed her again sweetly, sliding a hand up her back, resting it so his fingertips touched the clasps of her bra, but made no move to try to unfasten it.

Bella kissed him back and then sighed, relaxing against him, the soft fabric of her bra cool against Jasper's chest, and he held her as she snuggled slightly into him, resting her face on his shoulder, her breath washing over his pulse point in his neck.

He hummed quietly as he held her, lightly stroking her back. She shifted after a moment, settling down sidewise in his lap, her legs facing the head of the bed while Jasper still sat on the edge. Jasper shifted himself, trying to get a bit more comfortable; he was only half-hard, but his trousers had still grown uncomfortable.

"Everything okay, sweetheart?" he asked quietly after several moments. When she hesitated, he started sliding the ties from her hair and used his fingers to comb out the braids. His arousal had cooled, and he just wanted to make sure she was alright. Even though she'd initiated the kissing, he knew she was still in somewhat of a fragile state with everything, and he didn't want her to think he was disappointed or expected anything more of her.

Bella shivered slightly and sighed again. "Yeah. Everything's fine," she finally answered. She lifted her head and smiled, kissing Jasper again. "I've missed this," she confessed softly.

"Which part?" Jasper asked, shifting his grip on Bella to lift her up a bit so he could slide slightly further back onto the bed.

Bella tucked her legs up against her chest where she sat between Jasper's legs. She clutched her knees with one arm and her free hand traced random patterns over Jasper's chest. "Just being able to be close to someone like this," she said softly. "The kissing, the touches," she said with a smile, resting her palm flat against Jasper's sternum. "It makes me feel beautiful."

Jasper nuzzled her temple gently with his nose as he wrapped his arms around her, completely enfolding her. "You i_are_/i beautiful," her whispered. "But if this is all it takes to make you believe it, I'll do it, as much as possible," he promised.

Bella smiled up at him and kissed him again sweetly. "I'm going to change," she said after a moment, and Jasper released her after a hug. She slid from the bed and Jasper watched as she grabbed a pair of pajama pants and a matching tank top from her bag and changed right there by the closet, instead of retreating to the bathroom like he'd expected.

Jasper couldn't help but internally cheer that she was getting more comfortable.

While she was up, Jasper decided to take advantage of the moment and change as well. He quickly stripped out of his trousers and jumped into a pair of sweats. Jasper grabbed a raggedy looking t-shirt from the bureau and slipped it on over his head. When he turned back around, Bella was running a brush through her hair, the kinks from the braids slowly smoothing out.

Jasper turned down the bed and shut off the main light, leaving just his reading lamp to illuminate his room as Bella twisted her hair up for the night.

They climbed back into bed, Bella snuggling up against Jasper's chest with a yawn. He kissed her forehead. "Any plans for tomorrow?" he asked quietly as he reached back over his head to turn out the light.

Bella shook her head no. Jasper felt one of her hands slip under the hem of his t-shirt and rest against his chest. "Well, school work. I have papers to grade," she said.

"Should I wake you up?" he asked, stroking the back of his fingers down her cheek.

"No," she said firmly.

Jasper laughed and kissed the top of her head. "Well, I've got a thing at the hospital tomorrow. You're welcome to come with me, if you'd like," he offered.

"For the kids?" She nuzzled him through his t-shirt.

"Hm," he answered. "It's just a couple of hours, and there'll be cake."

Bella laughed softly. "I'd love to go with you."

"Okay."

They fell quiet after that, other than Bella's soft muttering as she slid into sleep. Jasper held her close until he was lulled by the feel of her breath and heartbeat steady in counterpoint to his own.

Jasper woke to the sound of typing the next morning. He stretched as he blinked his eyes open, smiling softly when he spotted Bella, in his discarded shirt from the previous day, with a mug of tea at his small table, working away on her laptop, a pile of papers next to her.

"Mornin'," he said quietly, his voice still thick, and he cleared his throat.

"Good morning," Bella said softly, but brightly.

Jasper glanced behind him at the clock; it was after nine, which was much later than he usually slept, and earlier than he figured Bella'd be up. "You're up earlier than I expected," he said as he sat up, idly scratching at his stomach through his t-shirt.

Bella shrugged. "I woke up earlier and couldn't get back to sleep, so I figured I'd get some work done."

Jasper rose and crossed the room, stopping to kiss her on top of her head on his way to the bathroom. He did his business and washed up, then turned the kettle on to make coffee. Bella had gone back to work after his interruption, so he stepped around her and made the bed while listening for the kettle. He had just dumped his clothes into the hamper (Bella's had already been picked up) when it clicked off. He made his coffee then carried the kettle and a fresh tea bag over to the table and topped off Bella's cup.

She smiled her thanks and Jasper settled down on the bed with his own stack of grading to work through. They spent the next couple hours quietly working until Jasper's stomach rumbled its need for food and he glanced at the clock to see it was after eleven.

Bella looked up and smiled at him. "Ready for breakfast?"

"And then some," Jasper admitted with a smile. "Will you be okay to head to the hospital from brunch?"

"Sure," she answered, closing the lid on her laptop. "Ready?"

Jasper grinned. "You may want to put some clothes on, darlin'," he teased. "Or you'll be livin' up to that nickname."

Bella blushed and ducked her head for a moment, but when she looked up again, she was smiling brightly. They both put their work away and got dressed, Bella in her jeans and a soft looking long waisted and sleeved t-shirt with her fuzzy boots. Jasper also tugged on jeans and a long-sleeved tshirt with one of Edward's hoodies. Bella tugged on her coat and tucked her hair back with her beanie before the stepped out for brunch, Jasper's guitar in hand.

Jenny was waiting for Jasper at the hospital, and he introduced Bella. The kids were excited to see him again, and he'd learned a few more songs since the last time he'd been, and the kids had fun. Bella helped him out a few times; her mom had been a kindergarten teacher, and she knew a few other rhymes that the kids really got into.

They were taking a break and letting the kids play with toys from the communal box while Bella was talking a few parents when Jasper's phone vibrated in his pocket. He frowned as he looked at the display, and excused himself as he stood to answer it. "Edward?"

"Hey, baby." Edward's voice was rough and tired sounding. "Busy?"

"We're at the hospital for the kids' day thing. What's up?" Jasper asked, making his way to the small waiting area on the floor.

"I just wanted to let you know what we'd be back in a couple of hours," Edward reported.

"You're early," Jasper commented, glancing at his watch. They weren't scheduled to have been back until well into the night, since there were two morning workshops Edward had signed the band up for.

"Everyone's sick," Edward said with a sigh. "We left first thing this morning so we could get everyone home. We've cut back on our stops since everyone's pretty much passed out, so we should be home between three and four."

"Is there anything you need?" He asked, smiling as Bella popped her head around the corner and he waved at her to join him.

"Just you two," Edward said softly, then smothered a cough that sounded rough and deep.

"Mmhm," Jasper mused. "Call me or Bells when you get into town, and we'll meet you." He'd need to call Alice and cancel the party, but hopefully she'd understand and just postpone it until later in the week.

"I will. Love you."

"Love you too, babe. See you soon." Jasper disconnected the call after Edward said his goodbyes.

"Problem?" Bella asked.

"They left early cause everyone wasn't feeling well. Edward said they'd be home in a couple of hours, and he didn't sound like he was doing well, either. You wanna call Alice or should I?" Jasper said with a wry smile.

"I'll call her," Bella said, hugging Jasper and kissing his cheek. "Do we need to stop at the store on our way back?"

"Might not be a bad idea. They're just about done here, so we'll be able to go soon."

"Okay. I'll be in after I call Ali."

Jasper kissed the top of her head and made his way back into the commons room. His guitar was already packed up, and Jennie was cutting the sheet cake that had been donated for the birthdays that month. He rejoined the kids playing on the floor, and Bella sat next to him after a few minutes.

"Alice understands and said everything would keep for Friday, if the three of us can, and I quote 'keep our hands off each other long enough for cake'," she said dryly.

Jasper laughed quietly and nodded.

"Alright, kiddos. Cake!" Jennie announced. The kids cheered and jumped up to swarm the table. Bella and Jasper stood more slowly, and Bella got cake (Jasper stole a few bites). When the cake was done and the kids were somewhat cleaned up, Jasper and Bella said their goodbyes to the kids and few parents and left.

Bella drove them by the grocery store on their way back to campus. They picked up tea and honey, Gatorade, and some throat lozenges, figuring one of them could go back out if needed. When they got back to campus, they found Edward's suitemate at home and able to let them in through the kitchenette so they could make sure the heat was on and leave their purchases in the kitchen before they went back to Jasper's.

They both resumed working on the stacks of homework that had been abandoned when they'd gone to breakfast and the hospital that morning, though this time Bella sat on the bed grading papers leaned up against Jasper, who was doing the same.

Bella's phone rang, which broke the easy silence they'd fallen into. "Edward," Bella said, looking at the text. "They just got into town."

Jasper helped Bella pack up her things and they dropped them at her dorm on the way to the parking lot.

When the bus arrived, they were waiting in the parking lot. The driver got off first and began popping the underside bins, and then the students slowly started pouring out. Most of them looked exhausted and miserable, and they staggered around grabbing bags and instruments before stumbling off toward their dorms. Jasper grabbed Edward's luggage before he emerged from the bus.

Edward looked half asleep and completely exhausted. He was pale but his cheeks were pink, and he was bundled into a hoodie with his coat on top, and his hair was a mess.

Bella folded him into a hug when he reached the ground. "You're warm," she murmured.

Edward nodded against her with a shiver. Jasper stepped over and kissed his forehead. "What needs to be done here?" he asked quietly.

"Clean up," Edward said hoarsely. "Paperwork."

Jasper took his messenger bag off his shoulder. "I'll take care of it."

"I-"

"Come on, sweetheart," Bella urged before Edward could protest too much, stepping out of the hug to tug on his hand. "Let me take you home and we can watch a movie before dinner. I've missed you."

Jasper smiled at her thankfully. He loved that she knew and understood Edward as well as Jasper did himself, and she could easily turn taking care of Edward into her needing something from him.

"Okay," Edward said, sounding somewhat relieved.

"I'll bring your bags when I've finished," Jasper said before Edward could reach for his suitcase. He kissed Edward softly. "Go on." He watched Edward shift a bit of his weight onto Bella as they walked in the direction of Edward's dorm.

Jasper climbed into the bus and made his way to the back, sweeping through for trash and anything that had been left behind, accepting the gloves and trash bag from the driver. He made a quick pass through, finding not much to clean up (many of the students had had small grocery bags tied off with them). Jasper settled the paperwork with the driver quickly and made a note to check with Angela to see that the man was getting a gratuity on top of his fee, if he'd had to put up with a bunch of sick teenagers on a bus for ten hours.

Neither chore had taken all that long, but by the time Jasper made it to Edward's room, his boyfriend was curled up in a ball, his head in his girlfriend's lap while she lightly combed through his hair, a movie playing quietly on his computer while Edward dozed.

"Everything okay, sweetheart?" Jasper asked softly, parking Edward's suitcase near the closet where it'd be out of the way.

She nodded. "It's just some kind of respiratory bug. The kids started getting sick on Friday," she reported, smiling softly. "Hopefully he'll just sleep it off."

"Hopefully," Jasper echoed. He kissed the top of Edward's head, then Bella on the lips. "Will you be okay here with him?" There wasn't room for the three of them together in Edward's bed, and even if Edward wasn't feeling well, Jasper knew that he and Bella could use the bonding time together. "I'll bring you guys dinner later."

Bella nodded, but frowned. "You're not going to stay?"

"I'll stay after dinner," Jasper said. "Edward's not quite as asleep as he wants you to think, darlin'," Jasper said with a smirk, "And you spent all weekend with me."

Edward muttered something under his breath, but his eyes blinked open. "Tattletale," he whispered.

"Oh, come on. It's only fair Bella knows she's being used for cuddling," Jasper teased. He kissed them both again. "I'll be back in a couple hours. Anything you need besides dinner?"

Edward muttered a negative and Bella shook her head. "I'll call you, though."

"Okay." He let himself out after another backward glance over his shoulder at the two of them. Jasper took his time walking back to his room, enjoying the crisp air instead of damp, for once, turning his face up to the clear sky as he filled his lungs, savoring the quiet moment.

Though he loved Bella and Edward, sometimes he still craved quiet time alone. After the holidays he hadn't thought it possible, as he'd been surrounded by the family, and loved it. But he hadn't felt any pressure to spend any time with them if he hadn't wanted to, and though he an Edward had been almost constantly in each other's presence, there had also been moments when they'd found space to themselves.

The thought kind of made him wonder how he was going to manage with two partners. Jasper knew they understood him and would give him time to himself if he asked for it, but he was worried about being able to ask and not just shut down on them. Also, somewhere in the back of his mind, he still wondered about being able to balance things out between the three of them. They all loved each other, that much was clear to Jasper, but he was worried that something could shift, and someone might be left on the outside looking in, and it was the last thing he wanted to happen.

He was slightly reassured, though, that one worry had been lifted from his chest. He wasn't sure that he'd be able to perform physically with Bella, but his body had responded to her touch as much (or more) as any lover he'd ever had (maybe other than Edward). Though they'd stopped before they'd gone too far, Jasper felt better that at least on that level, they would find some equality between them.

Of course Jasper knew it wasn't going to be easy. Hell, he knew a relationship between two people wasn't easy; adding a third was complicated and likely to be messy, but deep down, Jasper knew it was worth it. He couldn't imagine his life without Edward and Bella, and he didn't ever want to see that become reality, if he could help it. He'd work to make sure that it didn't happen.

Back at his room, Jasper glanced at the clock. He'd have time to get in a run and shower before stopping to get dinner. He changed quickly and scooped up his iPod and jogged ff to the gym. He set an easy pace on the treadmill and lost himself in the music and the rhythm of his run.

Once he'd showered and redressed, Jasper headed off to the cafeteria. He swung through the service area and picked up food for the three of them. For Edward he got soup and crackers, and for himself and Bella he picked out a variety of things they could share. He figured that Alice would have already spread the news, and he bypassed the seating area on his way back out to Edward's.

The door was unlocked, and Jasper let himself in, finding the room mostly dark. He toed off his shoes just inside and crossed to the bed after setting the dinner boxes on the table behind the monitor hooked to the laptop was playing the menu screen of a movie Jasper didn't recognize.

"Jazzy?"

"Yeah, it's me, sweetheart," he answered, moving to perch at the foot of the bed.

Bella was still more or less sitting up against the wall with Edward curled up with his head in her lap. She was running her fingers through Edward's hair again, and he was fully asleep, his breathing sounding slightly labored. Jasper lightly rubbed Edward's back through his shirts, which seemed to relax him some.

"How long has he been asleep?" Jasper was hesitant to wake Edward, but he knew he'd need to eat and then could sleep through the night.

"An hour or so," Bella answered quietly. "We talked for a bit before he fell asleep through the movie." She leaned toward Jasper and he met her half way for a gentle sweet kiss. "Thanks for giving us a little time."

"You're welcome, darlin'," he answered. "Ready for dinner?"

Her stomach growled on cue. Jasper laughed softly and slid from the bed to grab the boxes he'd brought from the dining hall.

"Edward, baby," Jasper roused him softly as he returned to the bed. "Dinner."

"Not hungry," Edward whispered.

"Sweetheart, you should eat something," Bella chided gently. "There's soup. Just eat a little bit; it'll make your throat feel better."

Edward sighed and slowly pulled himself up into a seated position. "I hate you two."

Jasper laughed softly as he handed over the styrofoam container and plastic spoon. "No, you don't." He kissed Edward's temple. "I missed you."

"Missed you too," Edward whispered with a wince. "It's good to be home." He slumped against the wall with his soup. "I'm so fucking tired."

"Long weekend?" Bella asked as Jasper put the other two containers down and handed her a fork.

Edward nodded. "The students were grumpy all weekend because they weren't feeling well, and then they were upset because they didn't perform well." His voice was rough and hoarse and Jasper almost wanted to tell him to stop speaking to save it. "And trying to shepherd them all myself was just exhausting. Half of them wanted to stay at the hotel, half still wanted to go out and sometimes I forget they're all just kids and compromising isn't necessarily in their nature," he groused.

"It's the last one you have to do by yourself, right?" Bella asked.

Edward nodded. "I'm taking chaperones on the spring break trip."

"At least you won't be on your own," Jasper agreed.

Edward nodded and sipped from the soup. "I hope you'll both come with me?"

Bella looked up from the tray she'd selected of chicken and macaroni and cheese. "Really?"

Jasper hadn't made any plans for spring break, other than to find out where Edward was going to be and surprise him there.

"Of course," Edward whispered. "We've wasted enough time so far this year, that I want you to come with me for that week."

Edward's voice was fading farther, so Jasper gently shushed him. "We'll talk about it later, okay?" he reached over and lightly ran his fingers down Edward's jaw and throat.

Edward nodded and took another swallow of soup. "How was your weekend?"

"Pretty good," Bella answered first. "Everything's ready for next weekend, and Jasper took me to the hospital this morning to hang out with the kids," she said with a bright smile.

Jasper shrugged when Edward glanced at him. "I like going and spending time with them, though I think I'm going to have to see about getting a few more guitars and start giving lessons," he said lightly.

Edward grinned and nodded.

"Alice wanted to give you a party tonight," Bella explained.

Jasper snorted back a laugh as Edward turned wide, sleepy eyes on Bella with a look of mock-horror on his face. Edward turned and stuck his tongue out at Jasper.

"But we persuaded her to reschedule to Friday, so hopefully you're feeling better," Bella finished.

Edward mouthed a thank you and Bella giggled. He put the top back on the soup container and handed it back to Jasper before shifting to slide off the bed. "Going to shower and change," he whispered.

"Do you want us to go?" Bella asked softly.

"Stay," Edward answered with a soft smile. He grabbed clean clothes from his bureau and ducked into the bathroom.

Jasper set the half-empty soup container on the floor while he and Bella finished their dinner. He gathered the empties when they were finished and carried them into the kitchenette where he knew there was a larger trash bin. He tucked Edward's unfinished soup into the fridge for later.

The shower shut off, and Jasper lingered in the shared space until Edward emerged in sweats and a hoodie. Jasper enveloped him in a gentle hug. "I'm glad you're home," Jasper said quietly. "Wanna see if we can all fit in bed together?" he asked, only partially teasing.

Edward nodded against Jasper's chest. Jasper wasn't sure they'd actually all manage to sleep together for the whole night, but it would be nice for them to be able to share some physical contact for awhile, at least until Edward was solidly asleep. He kissed Edward on the forehead. "I'm going to change. Do you have something Bella can wear?"

Edward shrugged. "Pajamas?"

Jasper nodded and released Edward, taking his hand and leading him back into his bedroom. Bella had turned down the bed and had already tugged on a pair of overly-long plaid pajama pants and slipped into a sweatshirt. "Hope you don't mind, I raided your pj drawer," she said to Edward.

He smiled fondly and shook his head, folding her into a hug while Jasper found something more comfortable than his jeans to relax in. "You look cute in my clothes," Edward rasped.

"I look frumpy," Bella retorted, but Jasper looked over his shoulder to see her smile in Edward's embrace.

Jasper left his folded jeans on a chair as he stepped behind Bella and wrapped his arms around them both with a quiet sigh. After a moment they broke apart and somehow managed to arrange themselves in the bed so they all fit, and Edward was sandwiched between Bella and Jasper. He and Bella talked quietly after Edward fell asleep until Bella dozed off as well.

Jasper watched them sleep for awhile, but eventually managed to extricate himself from the tangle of limbs in the twin sized bed. He scribbled a note for his…his brain struggled with how to define the relationship he had with Edward and Bella. Jasper left them a note so they wouldn't worry to find him gone in the morning; he wasn't likely to sleep and didn't want to keep them awake with his restlessness.

Before he left he kissed them both softly, murmuring quietly that he loved them, and set the alarm for seven in the morning. He changed back into his jeans and stamped his feet into his shoes. He locked the door behind him and returned to his dorm with a smile, glad to not have to let Edward go at the end of the week again.

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The next update should be next Thursday, rather than Tuesday. I know, it's a whole week, but with the recent wave of fail on Tuesdays, I was thinking maybe Thursday would be better. ;)


	45. Chapter 44: Interlude

**Thanks as usual to the lovely beta-team for keeping me on track. :D**

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Edward was only slightly surprised to see that Jasper hadn't spent the whole of Sunday night with him and Bella. Edward woke before their…well, he supposed it wasn't out of line to think of her as their girlfriend, and found the note that Jasper had left. He smiled sadly as he read it, understanding why Jasper had left, but not liking it much. Perhaps they would be able to start staying over at his parents' on Saturdays in order to give them one night a week together until the end of the term. It worried him that Jasper was still having trouble sleeping, but he also understood that he'd had those problems long before he'd ever met Edward.

He glanced back over his shoulder at the alarm clock. Edward didn't remember setting it the night before, but he hadn't woken to the sound of the buzz, either. It was only twenty past six, and he figured Jasper let Bella and him sleep in, since he wasn't woken at the regular time for the gym.

Edward managed to turn his head away from Bella's as a cough seized him, restoring the burning in his throat that he'd been dealing with for the past two days.

"Edward?" Bella murmured sleepily, raising her face from where she'd buried it in his neck.

He tried to say he was fine, but no sound emerged. He sighed softly and kissed her forehead with a sad smile.

Bella shifted and sat up, and Edward followed, feeling some of the tightness in his chest ease. She kissed him softly and slipped from the bed, looking absolutely dwarfed in his clothing as she went to the kitchenette.

Edward reached for his glasses on the ledge, and once he could see clearly, his medication for the day. He took his pills with the remains of a bottle of water, wincing as they slid down his throat.

Bella returned after a moment and handed him a steaming cup, keeping one for herself as she curled up against him on the bed. "Do you want me to call your dad?"

Edward nodded. He sipped from the cup, tasting tea and honey, and the warmth felt good on his abused throat.

"Do you want a sub for today?" She asked next.

Edward shrugged. "Dad," he managed to croak out.

"Want to see what Carlisle says first?" Bella clarified.

Edward nodded again.

Bella smiled. "Okay." She glanced at the clock. "He's not usually in for another hour, so I'm going to home and get ready for today, then call him and have him come by on his way in?"

Edward kissed her temple. His dad usually started his day on campus around 7:30, which was when a majority of the students began their day.

Bella rose and collected her things. "I'll come back on my way to breakfast," she said.

Edward nodded.

"Okay." Bella smiled and kissed his forehead. "See you later."

He smiled softly and saluted her with his mug. She left, leaving the door unlocked behind her. Edward sighed again and slumped slightly where he sat. Other than the cough and the loss of his voice, he didn't really feel all that bad, but he wasn't sure he'd be able to teach. He would probably cancel any private lessons for the day, and he supposed, with over a month until the next concert he could give the Wind Ensemble the evening off (the Jazz Ensemble rehearsal on Tuesday was already cancelled). He finished his tea and decided to go ahead and get dressed.

His phone beeped as he rose, leaving his nearly empty mug on the table. He picked it up and read the message from Bella.

_Dad says he'll be there 7:15 Feel better_ There was a little stylized heart at the end of the message that made him smile.

He sent her back a quick thank you and dressed in jeans and a t-shirt, throwing on a hoodie. If he ended up going to his classes, he'd change.

Edward silenced the alarm when it sounded at seven, smiling at Jasper's thoughtfulness. He settled at his table with his laptop and sent Jane a quick email, cancelling his therapy appointment for the day. He also emailed the piano students that he saw on Mondays and let them know that they could stop in for lessons, but he wasn't feeling his best, so he wouldn't mind if they took the day off. It would give him time in his office to get work done if they didn't come by, but wouldn't disrupt anything if they did.

He looked up at the knock on his door. "Edward?" His father stepped through, a bag in his hand.

"Hi, Dad," Edward rasped.

His dad smiled a bit. "Bella said you'd lost your voice. How do you feel?" he asked as he came into the room, closing the door behind him.

"Okay, otherwise," he whispered.

"Don't whisper, it'll do more damage," his father said firmly, but gently, setting his bag on the table.

Edward turned in his chair to face his dad.

"Open for me," Carlisle said, shining a penlight down Edward's throat when he did as he was told. "Okay, now let me listen." Carlisle placed his stethoscope at Edward's back and listened to him breathe. Edward felt his breath catch as he breathed evenly like he knew he should. "Cough if you need to," Carlisle said softly and Edward did, raising his fist to his mouth to cover it.

Carlisle patted Edward's shoulder. "Sounds like a respiratory virus that you picked up from the students, given the messages on the clinic phone," he said lightly. "Your vocal chords are a bit swollen, probably from a combination of the virus and having to shepherd the students for the weekend. Keep drinking tea, avoid things with carbonation or milk, and lozenges will help. If the cough doesn't clear up in a couple of days, come see me. It doesn't sound as bad as the last one, though; good thing you quit smoking," Carlisle teased.

Edward rolled his eyes. His parents had never really said anything about his habit, but he knew they quietly disapproved.

"Hm, I kind of like that you can't talk back to me right now," Carlisle said with a laugh. He tossed everything back in his bag. "Try to rest your voice as much as possible."

Edward nodded.

"Alright. Text me or your mother if you need anything, though I'm sure Bella or Jasper won't mind fussing over you," he said with a fond smile.

Edward nodded again with a wry smile.

"Be grateful you are loved, son," Carlisle chided teasingly as he rose and headed for the door. "Good morning, Bella," he said, greeting her with a hug.

"Hi, Carlisle. Thanks for coming by," she said, kissing his cheek.

"No worries. Anything for you," he said with a smirk, winking at Edward.

"Hey!" he protested hoarsely.

"No talking!" His father called cheerfully with a laugh under Bella's giggle on his way out.

"Everything okay?" Bella asked, setting her bag down by the bed.

Edward just nodded.

"Going to teach today?"

Edward nodded again, and mimed writing.

"Exams today?" Bella asked.

Edward nodded yet again, rolling his eyes. The yes or no questions were going to get old, fast.

"Alright. Get dressed so you can take me to breakfast," she ordered with a grin. "I'm hungry."

"Yes, dear," Edward mouthed exaggeratedly, making Bella giggle. She perched on his bed and waited while he changed into chinos and a button down shirt, throwing a knit sweater over the top. He shrugged into his coat and wrapped his scarf from Bella around his neck, and led her out, holding her hand in his right.

They found the others in the dining hall after they'd gotten their respective breakfasts (Edward getting tea instead of his customary coffee). He sat between Bella and Jasper and had to listen to the teasing from his older brother without being able to respond, but took it all in stride.

His classes were interesting, as he wrote instructions on the white board in the classrooms for his theory and music history classes. Only one of his students showed up for a lesson, and she just checked in with Edward and said she'd be in a practice room after asking to borrow the small digital recorder. He was able to spend the time he would have had rehearsal grading the days' exams, which he knew would make the students happy, since they wouldn't have to wait the customary week to get their scores.

At dinner, Edward had mashed potatoes, soup, and hot tea since they were easy on his throat. Despite the pretty steady stream of lozenges throughout that day, and the lack of talking, his throat felt like it was on fire. Bella brought him some rainbow sherbet from the ice cream cart that had started appearing at dinners the last week or so. It helped his throat feel better, but his chest still felt slightly heavy, and he was very much ready to go back to his room when Jasper walked him back.

Edward went to bed early and slept soundly. When he woke in the morning he felt slightly better, though his voice was still rough, and he was still coughing. Lozenges and tea helped, and so did cancelling rehearsal for the Jazz band.

It took most of the week for Edward's voice to start to come back. He followed his father's advice as much as possible, though the ban on talking only lasted through Tuesday. Bella apparently had been taking lessons from Esme, because she fussed over him in her own way, and he mostly just let her. Jasper seemed mostly amused by the whole ordeal, though he took care of Edward in smaller, less noticeable ways as well (like his laundry mysteriously getting done mid week and the appearance of a chocolate sorbet in his small freezer compartment).

Throughout the week, Jasper, Bella, and Edward tried to find small moments to be together, since it was going to be another busy weekend with Bella's conference on Saturday. They stole a few minutes on Tuesday and Wednesday evening after dinner. It wasn't much, but it gave the three of them a chance to be together in private for a little while.

Thursday evening after dinner, when Jasper took off to his therapy appointment before the history club meeting, Bella and Edward went back to his room. Having caught up on his paperwork during cancelled lessons and rehearsals, he settled down with a book while Bella curled up with him, a pile of papers in her lap, an orange pen in hand.

"How's your week been?" Edward asked her as they got comfortable, his voice still soft.

"Okay," she answered with a smile. "Working myself up into an anxiety attack over the conference," she said lightly.

Edward chuckled and kissed her temple. "You're going to be just fine, you know."

"Yeah." She shrugged. "You know me. I still get a bit twitchy at the start of the school year having to talk to new groups of students."

"Yeah," he agreed with a grin.

She smacked his chest lightly with the back of her hand. Edward laughed and kissed her neck, and she sighed softly and settled against him. They chatted quietly about her weekend with Jasper and some of the things they'd talked about. Edward found out she'd been in therapy for months, and that James hadn't treated her even half as well as Edward thought she deserved. His hands had tightened into fists when Bella talked about how she and Jasper had discussed her physical relationship with James, and then he relaxed when she told him about the ease of the relationship with Jasper, because she had been almost literally starved for the comfort of another person. Edward once again wished he could have beaten the officer senseless with his cane back at Halloween when he'd had the chance. He decided he'd have to settle for making sure any testimony he gave at the bastard's trial would be good enough to keep him in jail for a long time.

Bella kissed him softly and went to work on her papers. Edward wrapped an arm around her waist and hummed quietly as he read and she graded. At ten, he walked her home, bundling up and wrapping his scarf tightly around his neck.

Friday night after dinner, before Jasper and Edward helped Bella finish setting up for the conference, they went back to Bella and Alice's room for the "Welcome Home" celebration that had been put off.

Thankfully, Alice and Bella had kept it pretty low-key, with only a small cake from the bakery with "Welcome Home" scrawled across it in green icing with music notes as accents, and a couple of bottles of red and white wine.

They listened to music and caught up for a couple of hours, Edward filling his family in on some of the antics the students had gotten up to while they were somewhat unrestricted on tour. And when Bella laughed and kissed Edward softly on the mouth after one story, it was Rose who called them out on it.

"Bella, honey, I love you, but that's not cool," Rose said.

"No, Rosalie, it's okay," Jasper tried to explain, but Rose cut him off.

"Seriously, Jasper, you're just going to sit there and let the man-whore himself-"

"Whoa, Rosie, simmer down," Emmett interrupted before anyone could get even more upset. Edward understood where she was coming from; she was out of their general loop of confidence, but that didn't really excuse her behavior.

"That's not fair, Rose," Bella piped up. "You know Edward's not like that."

"Anymore," Rose snarked.

Edward rolled his eyes. The two glasses of wine he'd had had left him in a mellow mood, and fortunately, his soon-to-be-sister-in-law's comments just rolled off his back. "Alright, enough," he called good naturedly before anyone (Jasper) could really start to take offense. "Rose, I'm sorry, but you've been left out of the loop a bit here, and I apologize. We hadn't really told anyone, but Alice being Alice knew, and Emmett's apparently got Jasper's confidence, so…" he paused. "We're together. As in the three of us."

Silence fell over the room for a minute, though Alice looked extremely amused as she daintily ate another slice of cake.

"You're fucking with me, right?" Rosalie finally asked after a moment.

"They're not, babe," Emmett answered, moving to stand behind her, wrapping his huge arms around her tiny waist. "Though I didn't know it'd actually become formalized, either."

"It's not that we tried to hide it," Bella jumped in, trying to defend them all.

"It's just that we didn't want to say anything just yet. It's only been a week since we talked about this, and with so much at stake…" Jasper explained.

"Hey, I get it," Emmett said with a nod. "Gonna tell mom and dad?"

"Not yet, I think," Edward answered for the three of them. "Like Jas said, it's only been a week, and not knowing what's going to come up, I think it's better if we just…keep this quiet for now. Just us, okay?" He could hear the open note of begging in his voice, but if his family understood, they'd let it go.

Rose still looked perplexed, but she nodded. "Alright. Bella, you, me, and Alice gotta have some serious girl time sometime soon. And I think someday soon all of us need to have some real time together where we can talk. I don't know how it happened, but I feel like I hardly know you guys anymore with this revelation. Where the hell have I been?"

Bella looked relieved and nodded, slumping against Jasper's shoulder. "Wedding planning," Alice chimed in from across the room, answering Rosalie's rhetorical question.

"Seriously, though," Jasper said quietly. "There's a lot at stake here if the wrong people get wind of this."

"I got it, Jasper," Rose said with a roll of her eyes. "You may be freaks, but you're family."

"Thanks, Rose," Edward answered dryly. He glanced at his watch. "And as much as I hate to cause drama and run, we should probably get over to the library and finish setting up before it gets too much later or Bella has another couple of glasses of wine," he said lightly.

Bella pouted, but agreed, and the little party broke up with Emmett taking the leftover cake with Edward's blessing.

Jasper and Edward helped Bella finish the last minute preps for the conference before going back to her room for the night. He and Jasper had each packed a bag in advance; Bella was anxious about the conference and they knew they'd be able to help keep her fairly calmed down so she'd be able to sleep.

It took some doing; after they'd gotten the library conference room set up just right, and the display tables in the lobby just so, Jasper had to practically drag Bella back to her room. He ran Bella a bath while Edward got out the other stuff he'd prepared. Jasper returned while Bella soaked, and wrapped his arms around Edward's waist from behind.

"We're going to need to discuss living arrangements, if this all works out," Jasper said quietly. "I don't know what this summer is going to bring, but I don't know if we can go back to living in three separate rooms on campus when fall term starts. And fuck knows we could use some privacy."

Edward turned in Jasper's arms and kissed him softly. "I know, baby. Me either." It was hard for them to be together when they had separate rooms and responsibilities of being in residence. It also made it hard for Edward to know that he couldn't just be there if they needed him, or that they weren't within reach of him if he needed either of them. "We'll talk about it," he promised. "Soon," he added, thinking about the exchange with Rosalie, and the one they'd have to eventually have with his parents.

Jasper nodded and hugged Edward close.

They broke apart at the soft tap on the door. "Hey boys," Alice greeted them. "I'm out for the night, so if one of you wants my bed, you can have it; I'll be staying over at your mom's."

"Thanks, darlin', but you don't have to do that," Jasper said.

Alice grinned. "It's no trouble. I'm going to be working on stuff over there anyway, so Esme's letting me have the guest bed. Take care of our girl, okay? I'll see you both tomorrow?"

"Absolutely," Edward answered. "And thanks, Alice."

"Have a good night," she said, and disappeared back into her half of the suite, the door closing a moment later.

"Wonder if we could wrestle that bed over here," Edward mused quietly, and Jasper laughed, shaking his head.

"We'll figure something out for tonight," Jasper said, leaning over to kiss Edward softly.

Bella emerged from the bath a few minutes later, her hair twisted up into a knot on top of her head and a fluffy robe draped around her body.

Edward folded her into a hug when she shuffled into the room. "Take your robe off," he ordered quietly, "and lie down on your tummy."

She turned puzzled brown eyes up at him but he grinned, and tapped her nose with a fingertip. "Please?"

Bella blushed and smiled with a nod. She slipped her robe off into Jasper's hands before settling onto the bed face down, resting her head on her pillow, her arms tucked under her cheek. Her skin was pale and smooth under the overhead lighting, which Jasper shut off after he'd hung her robe on the hook he'd seen it on earlier.

Edward quickly went around the room and lit a few candles that she had set out, their flames casting a haunting dancing light in the room as he crossed to where Bella lay.

"I'll be back in a few minutes," Jasper said quietly, kissing the top of Edward's head and Bella's back, just between her shoulder blades. He trailed a finger down her spine and Edward laughed softly as she squirmed away from the gentle touch.

"Comfortable, love?" Edward asked Bella.

"Mmhm," she hummed, a smile showing on the half side of her face that was visible.

"Relax," Edward urged her quietly. "We're going to help you get to sleep tonight, so you'll have a good day tomorrow," he advised her softly as he reached for her body lotion on the ledge of the window. He slathered some on his hands and began a gentle massage of her back and shoulders. He mostly kept his touch light and soothing, though he did work out a couple of small knots that he found, smiling as she groaned in pleasure.

Jasper returned after a few minutes with a blanket in hand; he'd run down to put it in the dryer to warm up. He quickly changed into his sleep pants and a thin t-shirt, then took over Edward's place, running long flat strokes of his hands down a mostly-asleep Bella's back.

"How're you feeling, sweetheart?" Jasper asked quietly as Edward also changed for bed.

"'S good," Bella drawled.

"I've got little bit more for you, alright?" Jasper asked.

"Mmhm," she hummed again.

Jasper laughed softly and kissed her shoulder, reaching behind him for the blanket. Edward crawled onto the bed from the foot and took the blanket from Jasper, settling himself at the head of the bed. He draped the warmed blanket over Bella's back, then gently rolled her so she was laying in his lap. He undid the knot of her hair and slowly combed it with his fingers while Jasper settled at the foot of the bed, taking her feet into his lap and giving her a repeat of the foot rub she'd gotten in Port Angeles.

"You're gonna spoil me," she muttered, but she had a contented look on her face, her eyes mostly closed.

Edward bent and kissed her forehead. "You deserve it, love," he said softly.

She didn't respond verbally to that. Jasper finished his treatment by smoothing lotion up her legs under the blanket, and Bella was practically oozing drowsy contentment.

Jasper rose on his knees and bent forward to kiss them each softly. "Get comfortable," Jasper whispered to Edward. "I'll get the candles."

As Jasper slid from the bed, Edward shifted Bella slightly so that he could stretch out, his back against the wall. Once he was settled, Bella snuggled up to him automatically, resting her cheek against his chest, her back to the room.

Jasper returned after blowing out the candles and looked fondly down at them.

"There's room," Edward suggested. There wasn't much, but they could squish. They might not end up sleeping the whole night together, but he wanted to give it a try.

Jasper nodded and eased himself into place, pressing his chest against Bella's back. She hummed happily and snuggled a bit closer to Edward, who threw a leg over both of them to tangle with Jasper's.

"Love you," Bella said, the words barely more than a breath in the stillness of the room.

Jasper and Edward both echoed her words before they all fell asleep, warm and content.

* * *

There have been some rumors of pulling slash fic if it violates the site's TOS. I'm pretty sure Garden doesn't, but if you'd like to read elsewhere, I'm in the process of catching up to the story on Twilighted, and I'm also posting chapter by chapter at my fiction journal: mfic(dot)livejournal(dot)com. Entries are public and I'll make sure that anonymous comments are on so you don't have to login to leave a comment/review if you choose to read there.


	46. Chapter 45: Writer's Conference

**Thanks as always to Naelany and wishingforlove for their continual beta-efforts, and to oscar519 for the fourth set of eyes on this chapter. :D**

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Bella woke to her alarm early Saturday morning after the best sleep she'd had in a week, since she'd spent the weekend with Jasper. Her men had made sure she was relaxed as she'd drifted off the night before, completely content as they snuggled her between them, wrapped in a warmed blanket.

She wriggled one arm free of the blanket she was still entangled in (and the two bodies pressed close against hers), and reached behind her to switch off the bleeping alarm. It was five in the morning, an hour she'd never wanted to admit existed before, but she had things to do before the conference started with her opening remarks at eight-thirty.

Despite the bath she'd taken the night before, Bella needed a shower so she could wash and do her hair for the day. As she started to rise, she was restricted by strong arms wrapped around her waist. She shifted to face her captor, smiling softly at the peaceful expression on Edward's face.

"Edward," she said quietly, using her free hand to brush some hair off his forehead.

"Hm?" he asked, hugging her close again without opening his eyes.

"You need to let me up," she said with a fond smile. It was beginning to be a familiar conversation with him and Jasper first thing in the morning. "I have to get ready," she explained.

Edward sighed, but his arms loosened. She kissed him softly and began working her way out of her cocoon of blanket without waking him further or disturbing Jasper, who she could feel pressed against her other side, still sleeping soundly.

Unfortunately, she failed, as the blanket tangled around her legs and she more fell out of bed than anything else, causing Jasper to jerk awake suddenly. It was not an auspicious start to her day.

"Bella? You okay?" Jasper asked, peering over the edge of the bed where she sat, tangled in the blanket.

"Yeah," she grumbled. "Nothing hurt too badly," she said.

Jasper laughed softly and swung his legs over the bed to help her up. He kissed her softly, then turned her around and pointed her in the direction of the bathroom.

Bella smiled her thanks and shuffled off, leaving the blanket trailing behind her as she grabbed her robe and towel from the hook by the door. She took her time in the shower, shaving and trimming where appropriate, leaving conditioner in her hair for a bit longer than necessary, hoping it would make things more manageable. She wrapped up tightly when she was finished, and found her boys up and moving when she returned to her room.

"Any bruises we need to kiss better?" Jasper teased.

Bella shot him a dirty look, biting her cheek to keep from smiling.

Edward crossed the room and kissed her cheek. "Morning," he said quietly before grabbing his bag and making his way to the bathroom.

Jasper had pulled on his jeans and shoes. "I'm making a breakfast run. What would you like, sweetheart?" he asked her.

"Where are you going?" she asked, moving to her bureau to dig out appropriate panties to wear with the skirt she had planned, and a pair of tights.

"Depends on what you want," Jasper answered with a smirk.

She didn't want anything heavy; her stomach was already beginning to flutter with the first signs of nervous anxiety about having to speak not once, but twice in front of a group (though the second time as Izzy would be much easier). "Something light?" she suggested.

"I can do that." Jasper kissed her softly. "I'll be back soon." He let himself out.

With the boys out of the room, Bella slipped easily into her undergarments and tights before shrugging into her bra. She pulled on a tank top and a pair of yoga pants before she pulled her hairdryer from the bureau and set to work.

She didn't hear Edward return over the roar of the machine in her ear as she worked a brush through the thick mass in sections, but she glimpsed him over her shoulder when she turned slightly. For once, her hair cooperated and fell easily down her back in mostly smooth waves.

"Interesting choice of attire," Edward teased.

Bella scrunched her nose up at him. Edward had already dressed in pressed khaki trousers and a light green dress shirt, though his feet were still bare against Bella's area rug. She turned to pull her black pencil skirt, her soft, blue cashmere v-neck sweater, and black tailored suit jacket from her closet.

"Nervous?" Edward asked quietly as he sat on the edge of her bed, tugging on a pair of dark socks.

She nodded tightly as she slipped off her tank top and pulled her sweater on. She felt strong arms embrace her from behind.

"Just think about the look on Jas' face when you get up there as Izzy," Edward said quietly in her ear, and she relaxed against him slightly. "You're going to be just fine," he assured her.

Bella took a deep breath and let it out slowly. She nodded, but remained relaxed against Edward's chest for a moment. She felt his lips at the top of her head. "I need to finish getting dressed," she said softly.

Edward gave her another squeeze and let her go, just as Jasper returned. He greeted Edward and Bella both with a kiss. "Hot chocolate for Bells, coffee for us, pastries and some yogurt and fruit in the bag," Jasper reported. "I'm showering." He picked up his bag and headed for the bathroom.

Bella finished dressing, trading her yoga pants for her skirt and draping her jacket over the back of her chair. She sat on the edge of the bed next to Edward and accepted the small cup he passed her, smiling as he slid a napkin wrapped pastry onto her thigh. She picked at it, preferring to sip from the warm cup of liquid chocolate, though she took a few bites when Edward nudged her, eating his own pastry.

Jasper joined them a few minutes later, his blonde hair still damp from his shower, dressed similarly to Edward in charcoal grey slacks and a white shirt with subtle pin-striping. In his hands he carried his duffel bag and a pair of long socks, and his boots. He sat on Edward's other side and tugged on his socks and boots, then accepted his coffee and bagel from Edward, while Bella paced anxiously, thumbing through her cue cards for her opening remarks.

It was rapidly approaching seven and Bella felt the ball of anxiety in her stomach tighten.

"Sweetheart, come here," Jasper said quietly, holding his hand for her. Edward was pressed up against Jasper's side, one arm around Jasper's back when Bella accepted his hand and settled on his knee, facing Edward.

She felt Jasper's hand at her lower back, steadying her, though she knew she wasn't really in any danger of falling.

"You've done this before," Jasper counseled her quietly, his hand slipping under her sweater and making small circles against her spine. "You're going to be just fine."

"Jasper and I are going to be there, and you can just focus on us," Edward added.

"I know," she said quietly with a soft sigh. She knew she was being slightly ridiculous in her anxiety; she lectured to students every day, and the majority of the crowd she was going to be speaking to were her students and colleagues. There was no real call for her to be nervous or anxious other than her fear of making a fool of herself. She leaned back into Jasper's touch, letting it soothe her slightly.

Jasper glanced at the clock. "We've got a few more minutes before we need to go. Think you can eat a little more?" He asked gently. "There's a yogurt parfait thing in there," he suggested.

Bella nodded, knowing she'd feel horrible by lunch if she didn't eat a bit more. Edward rose and handed it to her before settling behind her, next to Jasper, adding his touch to Jasper's as she worked her way through the food.

"Jasper's birthday is next weekend," Edward reminded them.

"Edward," Jasper said warningly, but Bella saw him fighting a smile.

"What? We've got to make plans," Edward responded.

"No, we really don't," Jasper rebutted.

"Yes, we do," Edward and Bella answered together.

Jasper sighed and rested his forehead against Bella's shoulder. She giggled and kissed his cheek. "I'm taking it simple would be best?" she asked, scraping the last bit of yogurt and fruit from the plastic cup.

"Yes," Jasper answered simply. "Really, all I want is to spend time with you guys," he said.

"You're at least going to let us take you to dinner or something," Edward said quietly.

"We do have to eat," Bella said, adding a little bit of pout as she turned to Jasper.

Jasper rolled his eyes and smiled, kissing Bella, then Edward. "If anyone sings, I'll walk out."

Bella giggled again and kissed him back, while Edward chuckled. "Thanks," Bella said softly as she slid from Jasper's knee, feeling less stressed and anxious about the day ahead. She kissed Edward too, before she moved across the room for her blazer and slipped into her modestly heeled shoes.

Jasper helped Bella into her coat, and her boys shrugged into theirs before they headed to the library.

When they arrived, Bella found Aimee and Lara, one of her student volunteers, manning the check-in table. "Good morning," she greeted them both, as Jasper and Edward found their nametags and put the lanyards around their necks.

"Morning, Dr. Swan," Lara greeted her.

"How's everything going so far?" Bella asked. She shed her coat and left it on the empty chair behind the registration table, pulling her phone from her pocket and placing it on her leather portfolio that she'd left amongst the items she and the boys had set up the evening before.

"Okay. We've checked in a few people, and they're mingling. The cafeteria staff brought over the breakfast catering we set up, and everything is ready to go," Aimee reported. "All of the authors got checked into their hotel alright last night, and Dr. Reigh will be getting them here in one of the vans this morning," she reminded Bella.

Bella picked up her name tag, leaving Izzy's on the table for the moment. She nodded her thanks at Aimee and Lara just as her phone rang. She waved Edward and Jasper to go off without her while she answered it. "Hello?"

"Bella, it's LouAnne," Dr. Reigh's voice was tired and rough sounding. "I'm so sorry to do this to you, but I'm really sick," she rasped, and Bella heard a muffled cough that reminded her of Edward's at the beginning of the week.

"Oh, no," Bella said sympathetically, running through available people to take over. It looked liked Edward or Jasper was about to get called upon. "I hope you feel better soon. Don't worry about it, I've got some extra volunteers around."

"Thanks, Bella, I hope everything goes well today."

"Thanks, LouAnne. Just get some rest." Bella disconnected the call and sighed softly. She relayed the information to Aimee and looked around for Edward. She'd rather he go get the writers, since Jasper would probably realize that Izzy was missing. When she didn't see him, she pressed her speed dial.

"Yes, love?" he answered.

"My driver is sick," she said. "Can you do me a huge favor and play chauffeur for the authors this morning?" she asked. "Jasper'd notice that there's only five."

Edward laughed softly. "Of course. Where are they staying?"

Bella thanked him and gave him the information. Edward said he'd get the keys to the van from his mom, who was arriving shortly to help with the conference.

Off the phone, Bella sighed. The first crisis of what she was sure would be several had been averted.

"Don't forget to breathe, darlin'," Jasper said quietly in her ear, handing her a cup of tea. "I'll be around if you need anything. " He kissed her cheek, then strode away from the registration table, leaving her to greet attendees that had begun to arrive in a steady stream.

In the midst of greeting everyone, Bella slipped Izzy's nametag off the table and into the pocket of her blazer for later in the day. She saw Emmett and Rose arrive together, and later Carlisle carrying a box of supplies with Esme, who took over for Lara behind the registration table.

The authors arrived with Edward just before eight, and Bella greeted them all before turning them over to Esme to get signed in and make sure everything was taken care of so she could get ready to open the conference.

The conference room was where they'd had faculty orientation at the beginning of the year. Tall tinted windows at the 'front' of the room let in light. It was a good sized room, painted in neutral colors with a few paintings by students (and Alice) adorning the windowless walls closer to the foyer.

She looked around as she made her way through the conference room, greeting those she'd missed at the registration table. The buffet table had been set up against a wall with hot water, coffee, and iced water, and she spotted a few bowls of diced fruit and small breakfast pastries. They'd arranged for a similar lunch for everyone, and Bella felt fortunate that the conference was more or less confined to the foyer and conference room of the library, though if it kept growing in popularity, they might have to start using classrooms.

As she approached the lectern at the 'front' of the room, she double checked that her phone was on silent, though she knew that Esme would try to run as much interference to solve any further problems rather than interrupt Bella after things got started. From her portfolio she pulled her note cards again and began shuffling through them, reminding herself of what she wanted to say.

"Morning Dr. Swan," Emily greeted her. Emily was another of her student volunteers who was in charge of the audio and technology for the day.

"Hi, Emily. Is everything ready?" Bella asked.

"Yep!" the girl responded with a bright smile. "We're ready to go when you are."

"Thanks," Bella responded, returning the girl's smile. She scanned over the growing crowd again, freezing momentarily when she passed over a blonde male whose back was to her. She felt her breath catch for a moment, fearing it was James until the person turned around and she let her breath go slowly, her fingers unclenching from around her phone where she'd nearly pounded Jasper's number into her speed dial.

"Something wrong?" Emily asked quietly.

"Oh, no," Bella breathed. She smiled. "Not at all."

Emily nodded and offered her another smile before stepping up to the microphone. "Ladies and gentlemen," she said, her voice sounding from the concealed speakers in the room. "We'll be beginning in a few minutes, if you'd like to find your seats, please." When she finished, she moved to her seat off to the side.

People began filling up the assembled chairs, or taking places at the few tables that were set up toward the back of the room. Conversations began to trail off as the attendees began to look through the program and finish their drinks.

When the clock at the opposite side of the room hit 8:30, Bella took a large breath, stepped up to the lectern and placed her note cards in front of her before adjusting the microphone slightly.

"Good morning, Ladies and Gentlemen, and welcome to the third annual Writer's Symposium at Forks Academy," she greeted everyone with a bright smile. "It's nice to once again see so many familiar faces both from campus and the community. I'd like to begin with a thank you to our guests today, the authors that have traveled here to share their time with us."

She paused while the crowd applauded.

"Writing is one of those things that people seem to think you have to be really talented to do," she continued. "But what people don't always is realize is that we write more than we think. Most of my students will tell you that one of the first things I ask at the beginning of a writing class, be it creative writing, or composition, is 'what was the last thing you wrote?'"

Bella looked up from her notes and smiled out at the crowd. "Mostly, students respond with 'a paper last term' or 'an email to my mom'. So my next question is what about a text message? A shopping list? Did you write on anyone's Facebook wall or put together a blog post about your hiking trip? The thing is, we write every day, and we tell stories all the time. The only real trick to writing is coming up with an idea that no one else has sold before."

She paused for a beat before continuing. "Many of you here today are writers, or aspiring writers, though there are plenty of you here to meet your favorite authors," she said, catching Jasper's eye, "or earn extra credit by helping out. Either way, I hope that you'll all learn that writing isn't merely restricted to novels, but encompasses many facets of our lives. Today it's my wish that everyone take away something that makes them reconsider what it is to be a writer, and to listen to the stories that our guests have to tell, so you can see that, no matter how mundane you think your life is, you've always got a story to tell."

The applause forced Bella to stop again and she waited, smiling, for everyone to settle back down.

"Now onto the boring stuff," she teased. "We'll have three speakers before lunch, which will be an hour break for mingling and such, and three speakers after. There's a reception planned for this evening, and most of our authors have books for sale in the lobby and will be available for signing autographs at certain points throughout the day. If you find you need something, please speak to Aimee Johnston or Mrs. Cullen in the foyer, or Lara Greene, my student assistant for the day, if you can't find me. Overall, have a great day. There's going to be a short break before our first author begins. Please help yourself to drinks or breakfast munchies there on the table."

She stepped from the podium, feeling her blush heat her face at the applause that filled the room. As she'd announced, there'd be a short break before she would be introducing the first speaker. She used the time to get a bottle of water, and seek out Edward and Jasper's reassuring gazes. They both smiled softly at her from their seats near the middle of the room after she'd caught their eye, and she felt some of the tension in her back ease knowing she'd be going home with both of them at the end of the evening, and she wouldn't have to worry about anything.

Once she'd introduced the first speaker, she slipped around the assembled body and made her way carefully around the edge of the room to the back of the hall, before sneaking out into the foyer to check on Aimee. Everything was running smoothly, so after a moment of steeling herself, she stepped back inside to linger against the far wall and listening to the rest of the presentation and the questions that followed.

The remaining two morning sessions proceeded much like the first, and Bella began to relax slightly after each subsequent introduction. The speakers were engaging and her students were asking thoughtful questions. Over the lunch hour she expected to see a lot of networking, like there'd be in the afternoon reception.

After the third speaker, Bella reclaimed the lectern once again. "Ladies and gentlemen," she spoke into the microphone. "Lunch will be served shortly. The authors have books on sale in the lobby and are happy to be there to sign them, though I have been given a note that says Ms. Higginbotham won't be available until later this afternoon," she reported with a smile, and most of the audience laughed. She caught a glimpse of confusion on Jasper's face at the laughter, and she bit back her smile. "If you'd like to grab a beverage and mingle, we'll make an announcement when lunch is ready. Thank you."

As she stepped down, the crowd rose and began to file out, and the events crew, made up mostly of student volunteers descended, turning the rows of chairs into tables for sit down eating. Bella made her way through, leaving Aimee to stand by and make the lunch announcement as the catering crew from the dining hall arrived, clearing away the breakfast remains (that had been pretty picked over) and set out the lunch buffet.

She greeted people again as she glanced through the mingling crowd, looking for Edward, Jasper, and the rest of the family. Esme was officially working, but she found the rest of them gathered together chatting. But she was interrupted before she could get there by a student with a question, and then someone from the local paper wanting to speak with her, and then several of the authors cornered her and asked her what was up with Izzy's disappearing act.

By the time she answered all the questions and had a chance to breathe, Aimee had made the announcement for lunch and almost everyone was seated and conversation was flowing over the meal.

Bella took a deep breath and glanced around, once more locating everyone, and with a smile, she approached the table. "Hi, guys," she greeted them. There was an empty chair between Edward and Jasper, with a plate of food set out. "For me?" she asked shyly.

"You looked a little preoccupied," Edward said, as Jasper held her chair for her.

"Thank you," she said honestly, reaching for the plastic ware that had been set out on the table. "So, having a good time so far?" she asked the table in general as she began to eat. Her breakfast had worn off, and she'd have to remember to thank Jasper later for encouraging her to eat more before they'd left. The food was fairly simple, but good, salads and cold cuts, and she tucked into it as the family started speaking about what they'd enjoyed most so far about the day.

It was nice for Bella to get the chance to sit back and relax for a few minutes in the midst of everything surrounded by people she loved.

"Sorry to interrupt," Aimee said quietly as she stood just behind Bella on Edward's side. "Bella, there's a small problem with one of the books."

"Of course there is," Bella said good naturedly. "Excuse me." She rose, grabbing her bottle of water to take with her, having a feeling she wouldn't be making it back to the table.

She was right. She got the problem sorted (two different editions of one of the novels had shown up and she hadn't caught it early enough, so she made an arrangement with the publisher to get replacements sent for any orders taken of the right edition), and then got tugged into another conversation.

"Ladies and Gentlemen, we'll be resuming in fifteen minutes," Aimee announced over the microphone.

Bella excused herself from the conversation and made her way to the ladies room. She freshened up and took a few minutes to steady herself, fishing Izzy's nametag from her pocket and fingering it with a smile. She really couldn't believe that she'd managed to pull the deception off for so long. She figured when Edward had given Jasper the signed first edition a few weeks previous that he might have twigged to something, but Edward assured her that Jasper was still in the dark.

"Dr. Swan?" Lara peeked her head into the restroom. "They're almost ready."

"Thanks, Lara. I'll be right there." She combed her fingers through her hair, straightened her skirt, and walked back out.

The conference room had been transformed back into a lecture hall, and she lingered for a moment at the back as everyone took their seats.

"Hey, Bells," Emmett said, winking down at her on his way past. She frowned, but didn't get a chance to ask him where he was going. Lara was beginning to look a little nervous, so Bella made her way to the front of the room.

"Everything okay?" she asked her student.

"Oh, yeah, fine, Dr. Swan," Lara stammered.

"You're going to be just fine, Lara," Bella assured her. "You know most of the people out there, right?" Lara nodded. "Okay, so you're just telling them about me, that's all. If it helps, find one person out there to focus on and talk to them."

Lara nodded shortly and shuffled the note cards in her hand as she approached the microphone.

Bella stood off to one side, fiddling idly with a second set of note cards, letting her gaze drift over the assembled crowd, revitalized from lunch, as Lara nervously took the podium.

"Good afternoon," Lara started, glancing down at her hands for a moment. She glanced over at Bella, and she nodded at her student encouragingly. Lara seemed bolstered and she straightened fractionally and began to speak again, a bit more confidently. "It's my great pleasure to introduce our next speaker," she said.

As Lara spoke, Bella looked out over the crowd, quickly finding Jasper and Edward. Edward was already smiling, knowing what was coming, and Jasper once more looked slightly confused at the change in precedent for who was making introductions.

"For the past several semesters, I've had the honor of studying with our next presenter," Lara continued. "She's published a series of successful novels, but also has helped three years' worth of creative writing students find their inspiration and develop their craft, and I'm fortunate to be one of those that she's helped to guide. She published her first novel while an undergraduate student and has continued to publish throughout her academic career and has a new novel scheduled to be released this summer. Please help me welcome Forks Academy's own Izzy Higginbotham," Lara said with a bright smile, stepping aside as Bella approached, her eyes fixed on Jasper's face.

She felt momentarily bad for the deception as he looked quickly between her and a quietly laughing Edward. Bella winked and he grinned after a heartbeat. Edward leaned over and said something to him which transformed the grin into a bright smile as she gave Lara a hug and quietly thanked her before she took the podium once more.

"Well, hello again," Bella said with a smile, to general laughter through the hall. "Most of you know me as Dr. Swan, but I've been publishing as Izzy Higginbotham for…well, longer than I want to admit," she joked. "It's something of an open secret, though I must apologize for the deception to one person in particular," she continued, meeting Jasper's gaze through the crowd. "I couldn't resist the joke, and you can't imagine how hard it's been to sit on this since November!"

She was relieved to see Jasper's shoulders shake with laughter, and the rest of the audience joined in.

"All joking aside," Bella continued, finally getting comfortable as she was able to speak on a subject she was both comfortable and passionate about. "I'm here today as an author, to talk a little bit about my journey, and how my personal life has influenced my latest work which, yes, will be out this summer, if my publisher has her way."

Bella paused again to let the laughter subside and slipped the card to the back of the pile as she got ready to continue. "As many of you know, I've recently come out of an abusive relationship," she paused again, more for dramatic effect and to steady her nerves as she prepared to talk about something that had influenced her writing, but that she'd also not spoken to anyone, other than her therapist, about since it'd had happened. "And that experience helped to shape this latest book in a way that very little about my real life had before." She paused again, glancing down at her cards to focus on the story she wanted to tell, before looking back up and searching out Jasper and Edward's reassuring faces in the crowd.

However, before she could continue, movement off to one side caught her eye, and she froze as she saw James stand and pull a gun from his jacket. She shifted her gaze quickly to Jasper and Edward, seeing Jasper react first to her expression as he followed her eyes back across the room to James, and then again as she saw movement the other way, a fiery-haired woman on the opposite side of the room, also drawing a weapon.

"You lying whore!" James spat from his spot in the middle of the room. It seemed to have been an eternity since he rose, but in reality only a few seconds had past and no one else had reacted yet.

She could see Jasper had his phone out, Edward too, and then she saw Esme's face at the back of the room, her eyes wide, face pale as the doors to the foyer slammed shut and phones throughout the room started buzzing, including her own, tucked into the space under the podium. The school had just been placed into lockdown; she knew that instinctively without looking at her phone. Everything happened so quickly that she barely had time to react as everyone started looking around frantically, and she heard a few gasps and curses as people realized what was going on.

Thankfully, no one tried to make a run for it, and no one screamed, despite the clear aura of menace that James and his companion were throwing off. It was possible that most of the occupants of the room hadn't seen the guns yet. The woman remained standing near the middle back of the room while James approached. He looked deadly, completely emotionless, and Bella felt herself begin to shake as he stalked toward her, and she couldn't help but look toward Jasper and Edward.

She saw Jasper speaking quickly and lowly to a clearly worried Edward who nodded, but looked like he wanted to protest. Whatever Jasper wanted, Edward was apparently not convinced.

Her phone buzzed again and she fumbled for it, shifting her gaze back on James, who hadn't said anything else yet. Her fingers closed on her phone and she held it in a death grip as she pulled it out, glancing down just quickly enough to see the text message 'police on way' before she shoved it back underneath.

"What lies are you spreading about me now, woman?" James demanded as he approached. "Spinning more tales to entertain people?" he sneered. "Going to ruin more lives? Get another good man fired from his job protecting people?"

"Don't do this here," Bella begged, well aware that everything was going out over the microphone, though the room itself wasn't all that big and everyone could hear everything. "There's no need for this, James." Despite her best effort, her voice wavered and she watched as triumph crossed his face.

"Where, then? You took out a fucking restraining order," James snarled. "What, afraid I was going to hit you? Maybe I should have – it might have knocked some sense into you. Don't _fucking_ move," he screamed at Emily, who'd made a move toward her control board to cut the power to the microphone.

Emily shrank back in her seat, raising her hands.

Bella felt her cheeks heat up and tears begin to well in her eyes. The confrontation with James in the fall had been a matter of rumor across campus, but it was something else to have it all playing out in front of strangers. Speaking about it was one thing; having it presented first hand was something else entirely. She was also terrified for her life, and she could feel her body responding to her anger, fear, and mortification as she trembled, tears spilling over.

Voices rose as students began to respond to the atmosphere in the room, and the adults scattered within tried their best to calm them. Bella cast another fearful glance in Jasper and Edward's direction and saw that Jasper wasn't in his seat. Edward looked tense, clutching his cane between his legs, and Bella couldn't look around too far because whatever Jasper was doing, she couldn't let James know.

"Everyone, shut the _fuck_ up," James shouted, spinning around to face the rest of the room, brandishing his gun. His movement caused screams to run through the assembled body, but they quickly quieted when he pointed the gun back at Bella.

She froze, hardly daring to breathe.

"Oh, I'm not gonna kill you, _sweetheart_," he drawled, lowering the gun a fraction. "But you are coming home with me tonight."

"No," Bella said in a quiet voice. "I'm not."

James roared and whirled on her, smacking her across the face. As Bella stumbled, she tripped over herself and fell to the floor, feeling not only the searing pain in her cheek, but also in her ankle. She heard another commotion in the room, over the tangled voices of reaction at her fall, but she couldn't see beyond the podium, and then James, who stood over her.

"Get up," he growled, leveling the gun on her once again.

Bella struggled to get to her feet, but she could already see her ankle beginning to swell beyond the tears pooling in her eyes. Her skirt was tight enough she couldn't get her feet underneath her.

"You," James growled, pointing at a cowering Lara. "Help her up."

Lara skittered over to Bella. Bella took her shaking hand, giving it a soft squeeze as they managed to work together to get Bella standing. She shifted her weight onto her good foot and bit back a gasping "No!" when James wrapped his arm around Lara's waist with his free hand, tugging her back tight up against his front, setting his gun deceptively casually against her cheek.

"Now," James started again. "I think you're coming with me tonight, to keep this sweet little thing from getting hurt, right?"

"James."

Bella turned her wide eyes to follow the voice, and saw Jasper standing in the middle of the room. James' partner was out of Bella's immediate view.

"I believe we've had this conversation before," Jasper continued calmly after he had James' attention. "You're to leave the lady alone."

"And I believe I've told you to fuck off out of my business," James shot back, jerking Lara roughly around, causing her to whimper, and Bella to flinch.

"Look, man, this is obviously out of your league," Jasper said easily, his hands clearly splayed in front of him, showing that he wasn't armed. "You used to work with us, you know what the response is going to be. The cops are on their way if they're not already here and set up outside," he said calmly. "No one has to get hurt, and you can just walk away, if you put that gun down and let Lara go."

Bella glanced to the windows that lined the front of part of the conference room. Sure enough, she could see shadows shifting around in the hazy afternoon sunlight, though the polarization on the windows prevented her from being able to make out any details. She looked quickly around the room. The students were huddled down in their seats being quietly comforted by the adults around them. Edward remained in his seat, nearly frozen as his gaze shifted between Bella, James, Jasper, and the rest of the family somewhere else in the room, she presumed. The only ones she hadn't seen before she'd begun her speech had been Emmett and Esme.

"What's it to you?" James snarled.

"Lara doesn't deserve this," Jasper continued in a patient voice. "She's just a student here, and she's done nothing to get between you and Bella. Just let her go, man," Jasper asked, a soft hint of pleading in his voice. "Let her go, and you can walk right on out of here."

"No!" James roared. "I'm not leaving without Bella!"

"Alright, alright," Jasper said quickly, and Bella could see he was fighting to remain calm. "How about you let some of the kids out, then? You know we're in lockdown, but we can get them to open the doors so we can let some of these students go. That's best for them, and for you, right? So no one gets hurt?" Jasper suggested.

James seemed to consider this for a moment.

"It'll make things easier for you," Jasper continued in a calmly patient voice. "We know you just want to talk to Bella. The students don't need to be a part of this. Let's get them out of here?"

"James, please, let them go," Bella said softly.

"Shut up, whore," he snarled at her. "Alright," he said after a moment. "Students only. None of the Cullens leave," he said with narrowed eyes, looking over in Edward's direction, and then to the other side of the room where Bella saw Carlisle sitting. "And the girl stays, and so do you," he clarified, pointing the gun momentarily at Jasper.

Bella watched Jasper nod. "Students," Jasper called quietly. "Single file please." She watched him walk slowly backwards toward the door, keeping his eyes on the room. He knocked on the door when he reached it. The door cracked open and Jasper spoke quietly and quickly with whomever was on the other side.

"Keep your hands where I can see them," James shouted down the room at Jasper, who complied, continuing to hold his hands up in front of his chest.

"Dr. Swan?" Emily whispered from her seat.

"Go, Emily," Bella said with a nod, encouraging her to join the queue of students forming down the room.

It was only another moment before Jasper was waving the students from the room and they began to file out through the barely opened door. Bella knew that Aimee had the list of attendees on the other side of that door and they'd be able to check all the students against it to make sure everyone was out or otherwise accounted for. It took only a couple minutes for all the students to be evacuated from the room. It was a credit to the students, and to the drills that had been done throughout her years at the school that the students all did exactly as told, immediately, and she knew it had likely saved their lives.

Bella knew that with the students safe, the lockdown could be lifted, but she doubted it would be, not until all the other buildings were cleared. She was right, as the door was shut behind Emily, the last student out besides a terrified Lara, still being held against James' chest.

"I want all of you up here, right now," James ordered. "Vicky?" He called out, suddenly looking around for someone.

Bella saw Jasper flinch when James called out the woman's name, and she assumed that Jasper had something to do with James' missing partner. Bella hadn't seen anyone mixed in with the students. She watched as the rest of the adults began to move toward the seats at the front, seeing Alice and Rosalie for the first time as they took seats next to each other, their hands clasped together.

"Ah, sorry, James. Vicky, was it, wasn't feeling well. She's taking a nap," Jasper said somewhat sheepishly.

"Fuck," James growled. "No matter, she was fairly worthless anyway. You probably did me a favor," he said with a sickening smirk on his face. "I'd have to have taken care of her later, since she wasn't really looking forward to having to share me with Bella."

Bella reached out to grab onto the lectern, feeling suddenly dizzy as the extent of James' instability sunk in fully. No longer was he just her possessive abusive ex boyfriend, but someone she viewed as mentally unstable and willing to risk everything for something he couldn't have. She moved to sit down, feeling her body begin to sway.

"What the fuck are you doing?" James growled.

"Dizzy," she gasped out, clutching at the podium, willing herself to stay on her feet.

"May I?" she heard Carlisle ask timidly

"No. Sit the fuck down," she heard James order.

"Come on, James. You know he's a doctor, and look, she's really not doing well," Jasper urged him.

She didn't hear a response as she squeezed her eyes closed, but James must've acquiesced because strong arms slipped around her and she felt herself guided toward a chair in the front row, just steps beyond the podium. "Breathe, easy, Bella," Carlisle counseled softly. "That's it, slow breaths. I'm going to look at your ankle while I'm here, okay?"

Bella nodded and she felt him probe at it. Her ankle throbbed in counterpoint to her jaw where James had hit her earlier.

"Just sprained," Carlisle said, patting her calf.

"Alright, that's enough, she's fine," James growled.

"Edward's just behind you," Carlisle whispered as he rose.

She felt the slight tug on her hair and felt tears rise once again as she was quietly reassured that he was there. She bit her lip to keep them from falling and giving James any more ammunition by drawing his attention even further to one of the Cullens.

"So, what now, James?" Jasper asked. He'd apparently taken on the role as their negotiator. His hands were still clearly visible, though at his sides, palms out, showing James that he wasn't armed. "How long do you intend to keep us here?"

"Until Bella decides she's done wrong, apologizes, and promises to come with me," James said flatly.

"And if I don't?" Bella asked quietly, raising her eyes to his.

His pale blue eyes were slightly crazed, wide and wild, shifting even though he was trying to focus on her. "I'll kill her," he said plainly, using the barrel of the gun to caress Lara's cheek, sending the girl into a fresh round of silent tears.

Bella knew he was serious, and knew she couldn't let anything happen to the girl. Lara was her responsibility. But she couldn't go with him. She felt her hands begin to shake again. She didn't know what to do. She couldn't leave with him, and anything she said would just upset him and put Lara's life at risk. She felt another gentle pull on her hair and took a deep breath.

"I won't go with you," she said quietly, but firmly. She met Lara's terrified brown eyes and willed the girl to see that everything was going to be alright. "I don't love you. You hurt me, and you made me miserable," she told James. "I won't go with you, and you won't hurt that girl." She had no idea where the strength to stand up to him was coming from. She'd never found it when she was with him, and to have found it in that moment, while he was holding a gun on one of her students seemed ludicrous.

"Like hell I won't," James roared, his whole demeanor shifting, and she wondered if she'd done the right thing. "I know you, Isabella," he sneered. "You wouldn't let someone else get hurt for something you'd done. You'd do everything in your power to make sure that didn't happen."

"And you're a good man deep down, James, and you don't want to hurt her," Bella said, attempting to talk some sense into him, though she knew it was pointless.

"I _want_ you to admit that you were wrong!" James shouted. "I want you to come back to me where you belong. You're _mine_," he declared in a growl. "No one else will want you."

Her head was spinning with his contradictions. "That's not true."

"Which part?" he spat.

"I'm not yours. And I am wanted. I've moved on, James," she said in a quiet voice, encouraged by another quiet tug on a lock of her hair. "I've found people that love me for who I am, people who aren't trying to make me what they want."

"Who, the Cullens?" James said their name like a curse. "You're their charity project, _sweetheart_, nothing more. Why would they want you, an orphan, damaged from mommy and daddy's divorce, desperate to be loved?"

"I don't know, but they do," she answered in a whisper. "I'm not going back with you, James. You're an abusive bully, and I don't have to put up with that anymore. I deserve better."

"You deserve nothing!" James screamed. "I made you! I dressed you and took you out into what passes as society in this town. You'd be nothing without me!"

"I don't need you. This is proof of that," she said with a wave of her hand, still wondering where this strong-willed woman had come from, and wondering how long it was going to last. But she could see Jasper from the corner of her eye and he was nodding slightly, encouraging her, whether because she was doing the right thing or providing a good delay, she didn't know. "This conference is because of me. Because of my success as an author, which I found long before you. I don't need you, James."

"Yeah, well, I need you. Enough of this shit. I will put a bullet in her if you're not on your feet in the next five seconds. Five."

Bella didn't move.

"Four."

Bella could hear whispers in the room, felt Edward tug on her hair once more, saw the wild panicked look in Lara's eyes.

"Three," he counted down.

She believed him.

"Two."

Lara whimpered and Bella heard James cock the pistol he was carrying.

Bella closed her eyes, and just as she was about to stand she heard glass crack and a quiet "thwump" followed by a scream. She looked up to see Lara, pale as a ghost, the side of her face splattered with red, her shaking hands covering her mouth.

She leapt from her chair, ignoring the pain in her ankle and embraced the shaking girl, and less than gracefully planted them both on the floor as she began to shush her and rock her back and forth, James' lifeless body only a foot away. Bella closed her eyes against the sight of her ex-lover laying there, his eyes open and staring at nothing, blood beginning to pool under his head.

"He's down. Open the doors!" she heard Jasper call. Bella's attention was focused mostly on Lara, but she saw Carlisle kneel over James' body from the corner of her eye and check his vitals. When he sighed softly, she knew that he was in fact, dead, and felt something inside her give as she began to sob. She tried her best to stifle it for the moment, to care for the girl in her arms who had been just another victim of her folly.

"Lara, sweetheart, can you look at me?" She heard Carlisle ask as if from a distance.

"We're clear!Open the doors! We need to get medics in here!" she heard Jasper yell again.

"Bella, love." Edward's voice was closer, and his arms were warm and strong as he embraced her from behind. "It's over, sweetheart," he whispered. "Let dad take Lara for now. She's going into shock and he needs to look after her, okay?"

She raised her eyes to his. Edward's green eyes were soft, though she could still see the anxiety written on his features. With a sob she turned to him and buried her face into the juncture of his neck and shoulder and clung to him for dear life. She felt his hands on her back, rubbing small circles as he held her. Over her sobs she heard Carlisle trying to coax information from Lara about whether or not she was hurt, and Edward's quiet murmurs in her ear.

Voices swirled around her and Bella just closed her eyes against it all and let Edward hold her.

"I'll ride with her to the hospital." Carlisle's voice broke into the darkness Bella'd pulled around her momentarily. "I'll try to reach her parents."

Bella looked up to see Carlisle rise beside a stretcher, Lara strapped loosely down, covered in a blanket.

"We'll need your statement," an officer reminded Carlisle.

"I'll be at the hospital," he said. "I'll not leave this girl alone after today," he said firmly.

"No, that's fine," the officer backtracked quickly. "We'll get it there."

Carlisle nodded and followed the paramedics out. Bella watched as he paused to give Esme a hug and quick kiss. They exchanged a couple words and Esme nodded, clutching his hand until he kissed the back of hers quickly and chased after the stretcher.

"Dr. Swan?"

It took some effort for Bella to shift her attention to the female Asian officer who was kneeling beside her. "Yes?" she rasped.

"I know it's been a long day, ma'am, but I need to get your statement," she said gently.

"Oh. Right," Bella said absently. "Oh, sorry, do you want to sit?" she asked, making to shift out of Edward's arms to move to a chair. Edward held her tight.

"No, ma'am, this is fine," she said with a smile, shifting to join her and Edward on the floor. "Mr….Cullen?" she asked, looking at her note pad.

"Yes," Edward confirmed. "Edward, please. Do you need to speak to her alone?"

"No, sir, I can speak to you both at once. Neither of you are in trouble, we're just trying to get an idea of what happened by talking to everyone," she said, trying for a reassuring smile.

Bella glanced away for a moment and saw the sheet draped figure not too far away and swallowed harshly. She forced her attention back on the officer. "I'm sorry," Bella said. "I didn't get your name." Her voice sounded harsh and distant to her own ears.

"Officer Porter, ma'am," she introduced herself. "Do you need anything?"

Just then a cup appeared over Bella's shoulder. She looked up into Jasper's face as she took it, finding tea. She offered him a watery smile and he bent and kissed her forehead, lingering. "I'll be right over there, sweetheart," he said quietly, handing another cup to Edward. "But Edward's going to stay with you, okay? As soon as we're done, we're going over to mom and dad's. You need me, you just holler, okay?"

Bella nodded. "Thanks, Jazzy," she whispered. He kissed the top of her head, said something quietly to Edward, then slipped away again to speak with someone dressed in a suit, who Bella assumed was a detective or something.

"Can you tell me what happened, Dr. Swan?" Officer Porter asked after Bella sipped the tea, feeling the warmth and sweetness from the honey spread through her.

Bella quickly ran through the events of the afternoon, listening with interest when Edward interrupted to give his impression of events.

"After James…announced himself," Edward spoke quietly. "Jasper told me to call my brother, who had run outside to use the restroom, and leave the call open. I did, and turned the speaker volume off so nothing would carry through. Jasper sent the text campus wide to initiate the lockdown. Emmett used my call, I assume, to keep the police apprised of what was happening in here."

Officer Porter nodded as she took down her notes. "We did. Mr. Hunter had a partner, I believe?"

Edward nodded again. "Jasper took our belts, and snuck off while James was distracted. I didn't see what he did, but later, after the students were out, he said that she was 'napping,' or something."

"We found her unconscious and restrained under the buffet table," Officer Porter reported. "Who is Jasper?"

"Dr. Jasper Whitlock," Edward answered. "Formerly Sergeant Whitlock, USMC."

"Jazzy," Bella said with a small smile, nodding toward where he was still speaking with the man in the suit, joined by the dean.

"Ah," the officer said with a smile. She asked a couple more questions more specifically to Bella about the restraining order and how James had gotten in.

"I have no idea how they got in," Bella answered. "My assistant and Mrs. Cullen would have recognized him on sight and not have allowed him to enter. He had to have slipped in without being seen somehow."

"Okay," Officer Porter said with a nod. She looked over her notes. "I think that's all I need. Detective Peters will be handling this case, so you can contact him if you have any questions."

Bella took the card she offered, though she was intimately familiar with the station contact information. "Thank you."

Officer Porter rose smoothly and Bella collapsed back into Edward's embrace. He held her quietly for several moments while she fought to find that empty bubble she'd been in only moments before. It escaped her, and a thought popped into her head and she fought back a manic giggle.

"Bella?" Edward asked, and she could hear the concern laced in his voice.

"Guess I don't need to announce that we're done early for the day?" she asked.

"Crazy girl," Edward murmured, hugging her tightly again as she burst into tears. She felt herself being gently rocked as she wept. She felt so emotionally scattered that the only response she could manage was to cry.

She had no idea how much time passed, but she felt herself lifted gently and tucked against a broad chest. Bella recognized Jasper's scent and kept her eyes closed as she rested against him, feeling something tucked around her in his arms. "Shouldn't carry me," she rasped.

"Yeah, I ain't fallin' for that one," Jasper drawled quietly. "Just relax, darlin'. You can't walk on that ankle, and Carlisle's still at the hospital. We're gonna take you to the house."

"Alice and Rose?" Bella asked.

"They're just fine, love," Edward assured her, somewhere behind her. "They've already been cleared to leave, and Emmett's with them."

"Just rest, darlin'," Jasper said quietly before kissing her softly. "Everyone is okay, and James isn't going to hurt you, or anyone else, ever again."

She whimpered quietly and felt fresh tears spill down her cheeks again, and turned her face into Jasper's chest. Though her eyes were closed, she didn't sleep as they walked quickly out to Edward's car. She heard voices calling out as they left the building, but Jasper's voice rumbled a brisk "No comment," and Edward responded "Please contact the school administration," and she realized that the press had somehow gotten word and had set up camp in the parking lot. She really hoped no one managed to get her phone numbers.

Jasper easily slid into the backseat of the car and cradled her on his lap. His hand crept into her hair and Jasper stroked lightly through her tangled mane and down her back while the gentle purr of the car lulled her; not to sleep, but into that trancelike state she'd been in back in the conference room, where nothing existed and she didn't feel.

Somehow, Jasper maneuvered them out of the car without putting her down, and carried her into the brightly lit house.

"Do you want to go with the girls to get cleaned up, or stay with Edward and I?" Jasper asked softly when they were inside.

"You, please," she whispered back. It wasn't that she didn't want to see Alice and Rose, she just knew that Jasper and Edward were keeping her together at the moment, and she wasn't sure she could handle anything her 'sisters' might say.

"It's okay, Bella," Alice said quietly. "We're just glad you're alright." Her voice was subdued.

Bella peeked her eyes open. Alice and Rosalie were sitting close together on the couch; both looked completely wrecked.

"Hey, baby girl," Emmett said, coming out of the kitchen. He paused in front of her and Jasper and kissed her cheek before carrying the three mugs in his hands over to the couch, handing one each to Alice and Rose before he perched on Rose's other side and drew her up against his body. Bella watched as Rose turned her face into Emmett's shoulder, and hers shook.

"We'll be back down in a bit. Mom home yet?" Edward asked.

"No, she's gone to meet dad at the hospital and see if they've been able to reach Lara's parents yet," Emmett explained. "But I think we're all staying here tonight."

"Okay."

Bella closed her eyes again and she felt them ascend the stairs. She was gently deposited on a bed a few moments later, and she felt her shoes being slipped off. "I can do it," she murmured.

"Shh, love, we'll take care of you," Edward said softly.

Surprisingly, Bella didn't feel at all self conscious as they lovingly stripped her out of her clothes and tights.

"Do you want to shower?" Jasper asked.

She shook her head. They'd left her bra on and she unfastened it when Edward handed her one of his old hoodies, and slipped if off once she'd pulled the worn material over her head. Jasper helped her step into a pair of sweats, and then rolled a pair of socks onto her feet, being careful of her swollen ankle. When she was dressed she wrapped her arms around Jasper's neck and he carefully wound his around her back and hugged her tight.

After a couple of heartbeats she felt Edward press against her back, wrapping his arms around them both.

"I love you both, very much," Jasper said quietly. "And I'm very, very glad that you're alright."

"I don't know about alright," Bella muttered.

She felt, rather than heard Jasper's sigh. "No, I suppose not," he said softly. Edward was conspicuously quiet.

They stood together until Bella whimpered softly, her back aching from her multiple falls and having been on her feet in heels for a good chunk of the day. She felt Edward step back and Jasper effortlessly lifted her once more. "Ready to go downstairs?" he asked quietly.

"I don't know," Bella answered honestly. She kind of wanted to curl up and sleep for a week, but she had a feeling that she wouldn't be sleeping without assistance for a little while.

"We'll give it a try, and if it's too much, we'll come back up, okay?" Edward offered. "It's just the family, and they all just want to be there for you. And remember that we were all there, too, love, so they need our support just as much."

Bella nodded against Jasper's chest. She absolutely did not deserve these two wonderful men who'd stepped into her life. She felt instantly guilty for being so selfish.

Jasper kissed her temple. "You're absolutely entitled to be a bit self-centered today," he whispered. "What happened was traumatic and horrible, and it happened to you. Please don't feel bad for what you're going through," he advised softly.

Fresh tears welled and she didn't stop them from falling as she sniffled softly into Jasper's shirt. He cradled her close to his chest and waited for a moment before making his way back downstairs. "I'm going to leave you with Emmett," Jasper said quietly, "so Edward and I can change, and I'll make you some tea, unless you'd like something else?"

Bella shook her head. She wasn't even sure she wanted the tea.

She was easily deposited in Emmett's lap, and she was embraced gently, but firmly, in his arms, her knees tucked up to her chest as she attempted to get curled up in the fetal position.

"We'll be right back," Jasper said before kissing her softly.

"How you doin', baby girl?" Emmett asked softly. She felt his chin rest lightly against her head, and two different sized hands on her calves.

"I don't know," Bella confessed. "You guys okay?" she asked with a sniffle, her voice thick with tears.

Alice and Rose said 'yes' together, their voices sounding equally rough. Bella cracked her eyes open and looked at them again. Rose's eyes were red rimmed and swollen, her makeup gone, except for the faint trails of where her mascara had run. Alice looked similar, dark shadows under her eyes, and something slightly haunted in her eyes. Bella squirmed lightly in Emmett's arms and he seemed to realize what she wanted because he released her from his embrace, and she slid off of his lap and into the waiting arms of Rose and Alice, who held her while she cried some more. "I'm sorry. I'm so sorry," she kept repeating.


	47. Chapter 46: Aftermath

**Thank you to the beta team of Naelany and wishingforlove for keeping me on track.**

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Jasper slumped against the wall back in Edward's room, feeling like a puppet whose strings had been cut after he'd deposited Bella in Emmett's safe arms. The only thing that had prevented him from showing how deeply he'd been affected by the day's events had been making sure that Bella was alright; he had needed to help keep her calm, and if he'd given in to the emotions he'd shoved aside, he wouldn't have done her any good.

He desperately wanted to go for a run, to sort out his thoughts, but he knew he was needed, and that Bella would worry if he disappeared. Instead he closed his eyes and focused on his breathing for a moment, slumping forward to rest his head on Edward's shoulder when he was embraced. Edward's lips pressed tenderly against his temple and Jasper felt tears well in his eyes and he didn't fight them. He was all too aware of how close he'd come to having been responsible for loss of life earlier in the day.

Edward held him as Jasper silently cried, and he felt something wet drip into his hair, and Edward's breathing grow ragged against him. Jasper embraced Edward more fully and they sank slowly to the floor as Jasper purged his anger and grief at the situation, and let go of the guilt at the relief that James was dead.

"We could have lost her today," Edward whispered brokenly.

Jasper could only nod against him, his throat tight. It would have been his fault, too. He'd set the events in motion when he'd barged in on Bella and James back in the fall, and when he'd caught James in the house, pinning Bella to the wall on Halloween. Though the whole family had had a hand in helping her to see she didn't need James in her life, Jasper was the one who had taken the most direct action.

"You scared me to death, you know," Edward continued, his voice rough and low against Jasper's ear. "You snuck off after that woman, and then there you were, trying to talk James down…" he trailed off. "I don't know if I was more scared for you or Bella," he confessed quietly.

"I had to do something," Jasper whispered. "They wouldn't try to send anyone in to resolve the situation, not until the other buildings had been checked and cleared, and I didn't think he was stable enough to last that long," he explained, the day replaying in flashes on his closed eyelids. "I couldn't let any of the students get hurt."

"You were so calm," Edward said, a hint of awe in his voice. "The way you talked to him…"

Jasper shook his head and didn't answer. He didn't really want to think about it anymore.

Edward seemed to know what he was thinking and didn't say anything else. They sat together on the floor for another few minutes until they heard the front door open and close. "They're home," Edward said quietly.

Jasper sat up out of Edward's embrace. He smiled softly, sadly, and skimmed his fingers across Edward's cheeks, wiping away his partner's tears. Edward repeated the action on Jasper, and Jasper nuzzled into his hand.

"We're okay," Jasper whispered. "We made it, we'll heal, and we'll be okay," he said. He wasn't sure if he was trying to convince himself, or Edward, or if he just needed to hear the words out loud.

"Yes," Edward breathed, and leaned in to kiss Jasper. It wasn't passionate, but it was life affirming, and Jasper basked in the swell of love and affection between them. "Come on, we should clean up and go downstairs," Edward breathed.

Jasper nodded. He rose first then gave Edward a hand up. Jasper kissed him softly before walking into the bathroom. He lingered over the sink as he washed his face, feeling the rough scratch of stubble against his palms. He felt old and tired.

Edward brushed against him lightly as they passed in the doorway to the bathroom; he'd already changed into sweat pants and a t-shirt. Jasper did the same, pulling on a hoodie from the bureau as well, needing the feeling of being wrapped in Edward's scent. When Edward returned from the bathroom, Jasper reached for his hand and they went down the stairs together.

Emmett looked helpless and anxious, the girls cuddled together on the couch next to him, Bella sobbing out an apology while Alice and Rosalie held and comforted her. Jasper knew that Emmett didn't really understand what everyone had gone through, but he could see the other man's desire to help comfort his family.

"Jasper, are you alright?"

Jasper turned to look at Carlisle. He carried a bag in his hand and looked a bit older than he had that morning.

"Yeah, I'm…well, physically," he answered.

Carlisle nodded and clasped Jasper's shoulder before turning to Edward. Jasper heard a noise in the kitchen and gave Edward's hand a squeeze. Edward looked over and nodded, and Jasper went after the noise.

He found Esme leaning up against the counter, her shoulders shaking as she stood next to a shattered glass and what looked to be orange juice. Jasper went around the breakfast bar to her other side and embraced her, avoiding the glass with his bare feet.

"Everything's going to be okay," he assured her quietly.

"How?" she asked through her tears. "How's it going to be okay, Jasper?" she demanded. "My family was threatened today and I couldn't do anything to help."

"Was anyone hurt?" he asked her.

"No," she responded.

"That's how it's going to be okay," he explained. "We'll get through this. You hold this family together, Esme, and we're going to need you and Emmett more than ever for awhile," he said patiently. "All of us, though Bella more than the rest of us, I'd wager, are going to need your support. She's going to need you to be her mom."

Esme nodded.

Jasper kissed the top of her head. "I'll clean this up, okay? Bella needs you." He needed to do as much as he could to distract himself, too.

"Okay," she said with another nod. After she left, he cleaned up the spilled juice and carefully picked up the larger pieces of glass before finding the broom and dustpan to get the rest. While he cleaned he turned the kettle on for hot water and started a pot of coffee. He easily found the tray that Esme regularly used and carried everything back out to the living room.

Bella had curled up between Esme and Edward on the sofa, her head on Esme's lap. Emmett and Rosalie had shifted to one of the armchairs, and Carlisle perched on the other end of the sofa, wrapping Bella's ankle. Alice was missing, but he heard the floor squeak overhead. Jasper set the tray on the coffee table and all but fell into the other arm chair.

Edward shot him a look but Jasper shook his head, indicating he should stay there with Bella. She needed Edward more than Jasper did.

"Thank you, Jasper," Esme said quietly.

He nodded tightly, trying to keep himself from unraveling once more without a task to focus on. He stared down at his feet, feeling overwhelmed again as the enormity of the situation fell on his shoulders. Jasper fought back tears once again as pieces of the day kept replaying, and all he could see was Lara with a gun on her cheek, looking terrified.

"Did you find Lara's parents?" he asked into the quiet of the room.

"Yes," Carlisle answered, finishing the binding on Bella's ankle. "They're flying in from Southern California, and Tanya is sitting with her until they arrive later tonight."

"How is she?" Bella asked quietly.

"She was doing okay when I left," Carlisle said softly. "She'd come back around and was able to answer a few questions. They called down a trauma specialist to speak with her, and there will be counselors at school on Monday for everyone, though the Dean will be sending out a message today with emergency information for anyone that feels like they need to talk to someone sooner."

Alice came downstairs in pajamas and slippers, face freshly washed, her dark hair held back off her face with a headband rather than her normal spiked up style. She climbed into Jasper's lap, and he held her, welcoming the comfort of another body, even if it wasn't one of the ones he'd rather hold.

"They're going to keep her until her parents get there, and she'll probably be excused from classes for at least the week, if she opts to come back for the rest of the term," Carlisle continued sadly.

"I hope she'll be okay," Alice said softly. "She's a good kid."

"She will be, in time," Carlisle said. "Thanks to you, Jasper, and Bella. You did good, keeping your heads today."

Bella shuddered and shifted, sitting up and drawing her knees to her chest, burying her face in Edward's chest as his arms went around her.

Jasper just shrugged. "Did what had to be done," he said softly. "I couldn't let anyone get hurt."

"Jasper, I gotta ask, man. I saw the gun tucked into your pants when you let the students out," Emmett said quietly, lightly stroking Rosalie's hair as she burrowed into his side. "Why didn't you just shoot James?"

"What gun?" Edward asked, looking up from where his cheek rested against the top of Bella's head.

"His partner's," Jasper answered quietly with a sigh. "And I haven't fired a weapon since my discharge," he explained. "I couldn't risk hitting Lara, or missing James and having him start firing randomly," he explained.

"I know no one probably wants to talk about this _again_ today, but can someone fill me in on what happened?" Rosalie asked in a soft voice.

"I got the lockdown message from Jasper's phone," Esme said quietly.

"I was standing there and closed the doors," Emmett said, "Then my phone rang, and I could hear noise, but not much else. I listened for a minute and heard James, and kept my phone out for when the police arrived."

Esme picked up the story there. "The police response was fast, and they used Emmett's open line to keep tabs on what was going on inside. They could kind of see through the windows, but it saved them some time, they said."

"I had Edward call," Jasper explained after clearing his throat. He explained why. "When James was occupied with Bella and Lara I was able to get the drop on his partner. She was too focused on what he was doing that she didn't see me," he said quietly. "I knew there wasn't a negotiator coming until they could clear all the other buildings, so I just tried to keep James talking." He had to stop and clear his throat again, returning the hug Alice gave him. "It gave the response team enough time, I guess." He stopped again and took a deep breath.

"When I let the students out, Detective Peters told me to keep him talking, that they were getting snipers in place. He knew who I was, and my background, and since I knew James they weren't going to try to get another negotiator in, especially since most of the kids were already safe." He blinked rapidly, again seeing Lara restrained against James and he shook his head lightly to banish the image. "I tried to talk him down, but…"

"He didn't want to be talked down," Rosalie finished quietly.

Jasper nodded, his eyes falling closed. He knew that it would be alright, that they all walked away and most importantly, he got all of the students to safety, but he knew it would be awhile until they could all put the experience behind them.

The room fell quiet, other than the occasional sob that tore through Bella, and Edward's soft humming.

"Alice, honey," Esme finally spoke up. "Why don't you find a light movie or something?" she suggested. "Just for noise?"

"Sure, Aunt Esme," Alice answered softly and slipped from Jasper's lap.

He looked up and he could see Esme beginning to fidget with the need to do something. She needed to be helping her family in some way.

"Esme, would you mind if we all slept down here tonight?" Jasper asked.

Her eyes widened a bit and she nodded. "Not at all. I'll start sorting out linens for everyone," she said, her worried look lifting a bit as she had something to focus on.

Jasper caught a glimpse of his watch; he wondered how it could only be late afternoon when it felt like it should be closer to midnight. Bella had taken the podium at a little after 1:30. Had it only been four hours?

Suddenly his chest felt tight, and he was warm, and he had the feeling like the walls were closing in on him. "Excuse me," he choked out and he stumbled to his feet, then out through the kitchen door to the patio. He stood, face up to the sky, gulping down huge breaths of cold damp air, his heart racing in his chest as he fought to get himself back under control.

"Hey, baby." Edward's voice was low and rough in Jasper's ear, and he leaned back into Edward's body. To his credit, Edward didn't ask if he was okay; he just held Jasper until he felt ready to speak.

Jasper took a long shuddering breath. "I could have gotten them all killed today," he whispered.

"But you didn't," Edward responded softly. "You saved their lives today."

"I shouldn't have had to," Jasper argued. "I should have seen James come in and gotten him out before he'd had a chance to make trouble, or made sure that he stayed in jail after the last time Bella saw him on campus, or stopped him before he was able to grab Lara…"

"Or manage to get yourself shot or killed in the process, and where the hell would that have left us?" Edward asked, his tone soft despite his words. "None of what happened today was your fault, Jasper," he said, resting his chin on Jasper's shoulder where they stood.

"If I hadn't-"

Edward cut him off. "Stop." He turned Jasper gently so they were facing each other. "James is responsible for today. Not you. Certainly not Bella. It was his choice, Jasper. We place the blame for this where it belongs, on James, and no one else. The man made his decisions, and all you have ever done is try to keep your girlfriend safe," Edward said gently, his hand curling around Jasper's neck with his fingers stroking the hair at the back of his head. "You saved lives today, Jasper," Edward repeated.

"I know," Jasper said with a sigh. "But…" He didn't know how to express what he was feeling, and he wasn't sure he'd ever be able to. Jasper knew then that he needed to see if he could get in to see Dr. Jones before Thursday.

"It's okay, baby," Edward assured him, kissing him softly. "It's okay."

Jasper let Edward hold him for another few minutes.

"Come on, we should go in, you're freezing," Edward said softly. Jasper nodded, and let Edward lead him back inside.

Esme was puttering around the kitchen when they returned. "Will you give this to your brother?" she asked, handing Edward a list on their way through. "We don't have enough of anything to feed everyone, and I know no one's going to be hungry, but…" she trailed off. They had planned on going out for a group dinner after the conference's cocktail reception was over.

"Of course, mom," Edward answered, folding her into a hug.

Jasper peeked over his shoulder at the list, seeing cheese, bread, and tomato soup. He knew that sending Emmett meant they'd also end up with all manner of junk food, which was probably what they needed. If ever there was an excuse for comfort food, he mused.

While Edward delivered the list to Emmett, and he and Rosalie grabbed their coats, Jasper responded to the pleading look in Bella's eyes and joined her on the couch, easily wrapping his arms around her when she climbed into his lap, resting her head on his shoulder. She'd been crying, again or still, he wasn't sure, and he just held her.

"I never said thank you, Jazzy," she whispered.

"For what, Bells?" He nuzzled the top of her head, breathing in her scent.

"For saving my life again."

Jasper just hugged her tighter. "I can't lose you," he breathed. "I couldn't…" he took an unsteady breath and tilted her chin up. He kissed her as he felt tears again, and didn't fight them. Much like the kisses he and Edward had shared earlier it was tender and sweet, and he felt her hands close into fists around his sweatshirt before her right hand flattened and rested over his heart.

"I'm going to be okay," she said softly after she'd pulled slowly away. Bella offered him a small smile.

"I know," he answered, kissing her forehead.

She rested against him again, nestling her head under his chin. "Are you going to be okay?" she whispered.

"Yeah, sweetheart, I will be. Just like you," he said with a soft smile that she didn't see. They would all be okay, given enough time. They fell quiet, the room filling with the quiet sounds of the movie that Alice had put on, though once again she seemed to have disappeared.

"How are you feeling, Bella?" Carlisle asked, kneeling in front of them.

"Okay. Painkillers are working," she said softly.

"Alright. If you need something, let me know." He patted her thigh before he rose, after she nodded tightly.

Edward joined them on the couch, wrapping an arm around Jasper's waist, leaning on the shoulder opposite Bella. Jasper tilted his head slightly towards Edwards, and his eyes slipped closed as he just tried to focus on feeling them, letting their touch remind him that despite it all, they'd be okay.

Jasper opened his eyes when he heard a click, and smiled softly at a pale and shaky looking Alice hiding behind her camera. "You okay, darlin'?" he asked her softly.

"I don't feel well," she answered with a shrug.

Edward opened his arms for her and she set her camera aside and snuggled up on Edward's lap, mirroring Bella's position on Jasper. They all sat quietly, the movie and Esme and Carlisle's voices in the background. Jasper was reminded of their campout from Halloween, and he only wished (once again) they were doing it under better circumstances.

Emmett and Rosalie returned from the store when the movie was about halfway over, and carried many more bags than Jasper had expected into the kitchen. After a few minutes, Emmett came back out with two bags in his arms, and he started spreading things out on the coffee table.

"Here, Ali," he said, passing over a bottle of lemon-lime soda.

"Thanks, Em," she said quietly with a soft smile.

"And for Bells my bells," Emmett said, handing over a grape soda with a smirk.

That coaxed a small laugh from her, and Jasper nodded his thanks at Emmett as he leaned in for a hug from Bella.

"I've only ever seen you drink Edward's root beer, but me an' Rosie got some cola, Jas, if that's what you'd rather have," Emmett explained, as Rosalie came from the kitchen with two bottles that she handed over to Edward and Jasper.

It did not escape Jasper's notice that there was no alcohol present, and it was probably for the best. "Either's fine, thanks," he answered, taking the bottle from Rose with a small smile.

Emmett continued taking items from the bag and placing them on the table. Mostly it was junk food, licorice, M&Ms, a couple bags of chips, and boxes of different kinds of Little Debbie snack cakes. Esme came out of the kitchen a moment later with a tray of fruit chunks and Carlisle followed her with one of veggies.

"I know that no one is probably very hungry," Esme said as she cleared a space on the table with a look at Emmett. "But I'll have tomato soup and grilled cheese keeping warm in the kitchen, if anyone wants something other than junk food."

"Thanks, mom," Edward said, and they all echoed him.

"You're welcome, sweetheart," she answered. "Emmett, could you bring up one of the buckets and some ice from the basement for the drinks?" Esme asked. "That way no one has to go too far tonight."

"Sure." Emmett folded up the paper bag he had and headed for the basement stairs.

"Bella, can you help me start rounding up pillows?" Rosalie asked hesitantly. Jasper got the sense she was worried about asking Bella to help, but he thought it might be something good, to show Bella that it was still a semi-normal evening with the family.

"Okay," Bella whispered. She kissed Jasper softly and he let her up to follow Rosalie down the hall to the closet with the spare linens, limping heavily on her wounded ankle.

"Let's move so they can shift the couch," Edward suggested to Alice. Alice nodded and slid from his lap, curling up in one of the armchairs while Carlisle and Jasper moved the couch farther back in the room, while Esme carried in a large pile of blankets.

Emmett carried a beanbag chair up from the basement, along with one of the drink tubs Jasper recognized from New Year's filled halfway with ice. He set it along the wall, and went into the kitchen, returning with the cola and root beer, then made another trip for bottled water and another soda each for Alice and Bella.

A second armful of blankets from Esme, combined with the comforters and pillows from their beds made a pretty nice nest for everyone in the middle of the living room. Carlisle started a fire and he and Esme curled up together on the couch, while everyone else claimed places on the floor. Bella sandwiched herself between Jasper and Edward as close to the center of the room as possible. Emmett and Rosalie settled on Jasper's other side, and Alice on Edward's.

They spent the night watching lighthearted comedies. Rosalie faded out first, quietly falling asleep in Emmett's arms, who followed not long after. Jasper and Edward held Bella as she drifted off at first, then woke suddenly with a start. Jasper began to worry when it happened for a fourth time.

"Sweetheart, do you want to ask Carlisle for something to help you sleep?" Jasper whispered in her ear, brushing her hair back over her shoulder.

She hesitated before nodding. "I…I just want to sleep. Just tonight," she said, an anxious edge to her words.

Carlisle was understanding as he gave her, and Alice, something to help them relax, and sleep. Jasper found himself declining the offer, wanting to be awake, because despite the drugs, he knew that there was a strong possibility of Bella (or Alice or Edward) having a nightmare.

Esme and Carlisle fell asleep on the couch as Jasper and Edward saw Bella and Alice into an easy slumber. Jasper finger combed through Bella's hair as she slept, and held Edward's hand tightly with his other until Edward too, succumbed to his exhaustion. Jasper spent the night watching over his family, dozing when he couldn't keep his eyes open any longer, but not finding a deep sleep until a warm hand closed around his shoulder in the early hours of the morning.

"Get some sleep, son," Carlisle whispered. "I'll keep watch."

Jasper nodded and slithered further down in his blankets, turning toward Bella and resting his head on her stomach. He fell asleep easily, and slept soundly, his dreams vague and bland, though hints of the days' events crept through. They weren't enough to wake him, though; that task apparently fell to Bella, as he awoke to her soft voice and fingers in his hair.

"Jasper, honey," she said quietly.

"Hm?" he nuzzled her gently, warm and comfortable and very much not wanting to move.

"Can you let me up? Edward will stay with you, and you can go back to sleep," she said, combing through his hair with her fingers.

"Mmkay," he replied sleepily, only barely understanding what she wanted. He let her go, though, and after a moment, her soft warmth was replaced by one of sharper angles and a different scent. "Edward," he muttered, and drifted back to sleep.

When he woke more fully later in the morning, it was to quiet voices and the smell of coffee. He sat up and blinked sleep from his eyes, looking around. It appeared that, other than Alice, who was bundled up in blankets on the couch, he was the last to wake. The nest where he'd huddled down for the night with Bella and Edward was empty save for himself, but he could hear their voices in the kitchen. He stretched under the cover of blankets and took stock, finding himself in better shape than he expected, after the emotional turmoil of the previous day. His head hurt a bit, but he otherwise felt physically okay.

Mentally, emotionally, was another story, though he knew only the day would tell. He rose, stopping to check on Alice before he went into the kitchen. She was asleep, and by the soft pink painted across her cheeks, still wasn't feeling well, so he let her be as he went in search of everyone else and some of Esme's coffee.

"Good morning, Jasper," Esme greeted him as he stepped into the kitchen. "Coffee?"

"Yes, please." He cleared his throat after speaking. "Thank you."

"Everyone else is in the dining room," she said, handing him a cup. "Can you carry this in for me?" she asked, handing him a basket of biscuits."

He nodded, and leaned over to kiss her cheek before walking through to the dining room. Everyone was gathered around the table, and Esme followed him in with a pitcher of juice.

"Jasper, just in time for breakfast, bro," Emmett said with a smile from his place next to Rosalie. The blond woman looked more put together than she had the previous evening, and Jasper suspected that the nights' sleep had helped her more than anything, and that she'd be fine sooner than the rest of them, except maybe Carlisle. His father figure seemed to have handled everything that had happened the previous day with a grace that Jasper envied.

Jasper set the basket on the table and took the seat on Bella's left, Edward on her right. He wasn't quite awake enough for breakfast, but joined them anyway. "Morning," he responded to Emmett with a nod, feeling Bella take his hand under the table and give it a squeeze. "How are you?" he asked quietly.

"Okay," she whispered. "A little better."

Jasper offered her a small smile, which she returned. He noticed that she didn't take much breakfast, but she ate what she put on her plate, with a large glass of juice, so he told himself not to worry. Jasper sipped his coffee and picked at a biscuit.

"So," Esme began quietly. "Uhm. Dr. Harper will be coming around sometime later this morning," she said. "He wanted to speak with all of us before the campus dinner tonight," she explained.

"How bad has the media been?" Emmett asked.

"They're being strangely understanding," Esme answered. "Of course, that could be because a few people have already granted interviews, so they may leave us alone when this all blows over."

"And the students?" Jasper asked.

"The reporters are not permitted in the dorms, and the Dean said he'd be sending out information for all the students on that front as well," Esme explained. "Unfortunately, when we put the plans into place for any situation involving the need for a lockdown, we also set up procedures for dealing with the media as well," she said with a sigh.

"It's sad that schools need that, but as we all know first hand, it's not just because of the potential for student violence," Bella said quietly, looking down at her plate.

"Are you going to be okay, Bells?" Emmett asked from across the table.

She nodded. "Yeah. Someday I'll realize that it wasn't my fault, though I don't know that I'll ever stop feeling guilty."

Jasper understood that sentiment and hugged her awkwardly with one arm.

Bella sighed. "And I'm not sure about the conference now. As much as I hate James for what he did to me, and Lara, and the rest of the students, I almost hate him more for ruining something that was mine, that was tied to my professional reputations. I'm not sure we can hold the symposium anymore; at least not with the same name," she said sadly with a shake of her head.

"I'm sure it wasn't ruined, Bella," Rosalie said from beside Emmett.

Bella shrugged. "Something like this makes national news, even if just a blip. I'll just have to see. Maybe nothing will come of it, and we'll get to continue, if we can even get anyone to come back," she said with a sigh. "We'll see," she repeated. "I want to so badly to hate him, but part of me is sad that he's dead."

"That's normal," Carlisle responded. "He hurt you, Bella. And part of you had some positive feelings for him, for a long time. I'd be more worried if you weren't sad, kiddo," he said with a half-grin that reminded Jasper of Edward.

She nodded tightly.

"Hey, sweetheart," Jasper spoke quietly as Emmett responded to Carlisle. "I'm going to call my therapist when we're done and set up a second appointment for this week," he explained. "Do you want to come with me? Maybe Edward, too?" he suggested.

"Maybe," Bella answered softly. "But I think I'll do the same. Thanks, Jazzy." She leaned over and kissed his cheek.

When breakfast was over they helped clear the table and Carlisle went to check on Alice. Jasper, Bella, and Edward went up to his bedroom. Bella kissed both Jasper and Edward softly before she ducked into Edward's bathroom, citing her need for a shower.

Jasper sat on the edge of the bed after pulling his phone from the pocket of the trousers he'd worn the day before. He spun the device idly between his hands as Edward settled next to him. "What's wrong?" Edward asked quietly.

Jasper shook his head. "Nothing."

"Jasper."

"No, really," Jasper answered. "I just…I need to see if I can get in to see Dr. Jones before Thursday. Do you…would you…depending on when and if she can get me in, would you want to come with me?"

Edward was quiet for moment. "Yes," he answered finally. "I think it would be good for us."

Jasper nodded, twisting his phone until it ended up the right way in his hands for him to flip it open. Edward took Jasper's free hand as he dialed the doctor's office. "Hi, Dr. Jones, this is Jasper Whitlock. I, uh, needed to see if there was a chance I, and maybe my partner, could get in to see you earlier this week, in addition to my appointment on Thursday," he said to the recording. "There was an incident at school over the weekend, and I think it's really important that I, we, talk about it. Anyway, please give me a call so we can see if something's available. Any time of day is okay, I can make time in my schedule." After rattling off his phone number, Jasper disconnected with a heavy sigh.

He leaned into Edward after setting his phone aside.

They sat quietly, listening to the sound of the shower running in the other room. Jasper didn't have any words to say, and he got the sense that Edward just wasn't sure what, if anything, to say. Jasper didn't mind, though; the quiet was a welcome change and gave Jasper the chance to try to keep his feelings in check.

Bella emerged from the bathroom, limping as she tried to keep weight off her injured ankle, wrapped in oversized towels. "Can I borrow some clothes, Edward?" she asked meekly.

"Of course, love," Edward responded. He kissed Jasper softly and rose, crossing the room to help her find something to wear.

It took them some time, but there was an old pair of pajama pants in the back of a drawer that fit her better than the sweats the previous evening. She topped off with another hoodie that dwarfed her, but she looked more comfortable as she leaned on Edward's arm as they crossed to the bed, and she settled next to Jasper. Edward perched on her other side and again they just cuddled together, soaking up as much of each other as they could.

"Can I borrow your phone, Jazzy?" Bella asked into the silence after some time.

"Sure, darlin'," he said, reaching for where he'd left it on the bed and handed it over. "You need privacy?"

She shook her head. "No, it's okay," she said as she dialed. She left a message similar to Jasper's with her therapist's answering service, leaving Jasper's and the Cullen's numbers for her to call, since Bella's phone had been left behind in the conference room when they'd left the previous afternoon.

"We should get you a new phone this afternoon," Edward said.

Bella shook her head again. "No, I don't need a new phone, I just need to get mine from the conference room when we get back on campus."

"Are you sure, sweetheart?" Jasper asked. He wouldn't blame her if she never wanted to go in the room again.

She nodded. "I'm sure. Besides, I'd bet Aimee has it anyway; the room had to be cleaned before tomorrow for another event."

Jasper didn't voice the thought that the room would be out of use for awhile because of the events of the previous day. "Okay. We'll see if she left it in the office when we get back tonight."

"Thanks," she said, kissing them each softly. "Uhm, about tonight…"

"What's on your mind, love?" Edward asked, hugging her loosely.

"If Alice still isn't feeling well, and I can't sleep…" she trailed off.

"My door will be unlocked," Jasper promised.

"Mine, too," Edward said.

She smiled softly. "Thank you," she whispered.

"I love you. Both of you," Jasper said, quietly sincere.

"I love you, too," Edward responded.

"I love you both, so very much," Bella echoed.

The remained cuddled up together until the sound of the doorbell rang through the house.

"That'll be the Dean," Edward said quietly. "We should go downstairs."

Bella sighed softly and nodded. "Yeah."

Jasper kissed her softly. "It's going to be fine, sweetheart. Remember, we're not in any trouble. He just wants to speak with us, probably before we get back to campus and have to deal with the rumor mill again."

"I know," Bella said. "But none of this would have happened if not for me," she whispered.

"No," Edward said firmly. "None of this is your fault, just like it's not Jasper's fault, and I will keep reminding you both of that until I'm blue in the face," he said. "You did not ask James to come to the conference with a gun and force a roomful of people to listen to him rail at you. You did not ask him to become obsessively controlling over you to the point where he couldn't let you go. It's not your fault," he said, his expression soft but his words firm.

"I know," Bella whispered. "But-"

"No buts, darlin'," Jasper said quietly. "Edward's right, as hard as it is for us to believe." He kissed her softly. "You didn't ask for any of this to happen, and you can't keep blaming yourself for James' choices."

"Then you can't either," Bella said softly.

Jasper nodded. "I know. I also know that it's harder to do than it sounds."

Bella nodded. "I'll try."

"Good," Edward said with a smile. He kissed Bella, then Jasper. "Ready?"

"I guess," Bella answered.

Jasper helped her from the bed and supported her downstairs, since she refused to let him carry her anymore. Edward followed behind them on the stairs.

Dr. Harper was standing with Esme and Carlisle in the living room, while Emmett and Rosalie perched in one of the armchairs. Alice was still wrapped up in blankets, but she was awake in a corner of the couch, clasping a mug between her hands. Jasper settled Bella next to her, smiling softly when Bella drew Alice into a hug and let Alice rest her head on Bella's shoulder. Jasper sat on Bella's other side and Edward squeezed in next to him.

"Let me grab a chair," Carlisle said, stepping away from the Dean and Esme, and returned a moment later with one of the dining room chairs. He moved to sit down but Dr. Harper waved him off.

Esme and Carlisle sat in the armchair and the Dean took the dining room chair. "I'm sorry for barging in on you all like this," Dr. Harper started.

"It's alright," Esme responded. "Thanks for letting us know you were coming."

The Dean nodded. "I just wanted to get the chance to talk with you, before you get back on campus. Rumors have already started to spread, though they're actually fairly accurate this time around. I've spoken with most of the students who were present yesterday and they're mostly doing well, and have largely taken it upon themselves to keep things straight. They're…very protective of the truth of what happened."

Jasper gave Bella a one-armed hug.

"Of course I will be speaking about this tonight at dinner," Dr. Harper continued. "We can't let this go; too many students are only hearing the rumors, no matter how truthful. Unfortunately," he said, turning to look at Bella "I won't be able to keep your identities out of it this time."

Bella nodded her understanding. "It's okay."

"I don't expect any of you there tonight, and we're prepared to give any of you that need it administrative leave for a week," the Dean explained. "We just need to know in time to get subs in place."

"They can let me know," Esme responded.

Jasper appreciated the offer, but knew he wouldn't be using it. The best thing for him was to get back into his routine so he could move forward.

"The other thing I wanted to speak to you about is the media coverage," Dr. Harper continued. "So far, we've been fielding all the calls, but it's probably just a matter of time before they track down your numbers. The students are protected, as they're mostly minors, and most of them don't want to speak with the media anyway. Of course, you can continue to refer any questions back to the administration and we will, in turn, continue to relay them to the school's attorneys and the police. However, we can't really prevent you from speaking to the media if you wish."

"I don't think any of us want to," Emmett said, and the rest of the family murmured their agreement.

"That will certainly make things easier," the Dean responded. "If you do decide that you want to grant anyone an interview, I just want to ask that you review the policies for media coverage that are in the handbook."

Everyone nodded.

"Are there any questions that I can answer for you?" He asked next.

"How's Lara?" Alice asked, her voice rough.

"I spoke with her parents this morning, and she seems to be doing well. She's taking this week off, so if you have her in classes, please pass on her assignments to Esme," he explained. "I'll be meeting with her and her parents on Friday to see if she'll be rejoining us for the semester. She asked after you, Bella, and I told her you were fine, but she'd probably like to hear from you, when you're up to it. I have her contact information."

"Of course," Bella said softly. "I'd like to speak with her, too."

"Is it okay if we address this in classes, to keep from having to answer a lot of questions?" Rosalie asked.

"I'll leave that up to you," Dr. Harper responded. "We've so far advised the faculty to handle it as they best see fit, just try not to take up too much time from the curriculum," he suggested. "We'll have counselors available beginning tomorrow for the whole campus community, so there will be some professionals for everyone to speak with."

After no one else had any questions, the dean spoke again. "May I speak with Bella and Jasper alone for a few minutes?"

Bella and Jasper nodded. "Why don't you use my office," Carlisle suggested.

Jasper rose and gave Bella a hand up from the couch, supporting her as she limped down the hall toward Carlisle's office, the dean just behind them. Dr. Harper closed the door behind them, as Jasper led Bella to one of the chairs facing Carlisle's desk. The Dean leaned against the desk instead of sitting behind it, while Jasper took the other chair.

"How are you both? Truly?" Dr. Harper asked.

Bella shrugged. "Physically, I'll heal. The rest may take awhile."

Jasper nodded. "It's going to take some time, but we'll be okay."

The Dean looked thoughtful as he nodded. "The Board is going to want to speak with you both sometime in the next week," he explained. "Jasper, because of the action you took yesterday, and Bella, because they'd like to know what, exactly, led to the situation. As soon as they inform me of when the special session will be held, I'll contact you."

Bella looked terrified, and Jasper took her hand, lightly running his thumb over her knuckles in quiet reassurance.

"Neither of you are in any trouble, just to clarify," he continued gently. "Mostly we need to figure out what we need to do to keep this from happening again. Both of you did exactly right yesterday in keeping your heads and attempting to talk yourselves and everyone else out of a dangerous situation, and there have already been numerous thankful calls from parents, who heard from their children what happened, before and after it hit the news.

"That's not to say there won't be any fallout. But there won't be any professional ramifications, and the only thing I can see happening is more drills in the future, and perhaps a course for all faculty in negotiation and tactics. Anyway, it's something for the Board to discuss at a later time," he said dismissively.

Jasper nodded his understanding. He knew there'd be some consequences, even if he knew, intellectually, that he and Bella were not at all responsible, directly, at any rate, for what had happened.

"Alright, I'll let you get back to your day. If we see you this evening, you should be prepared for the students to be talking. Again, if you need to take some time, please do," he said sincerely. "You're both fantastic teachers, and I'd hate to lose you both because you haven't taken the time you need to process and deal with everything," he said sagely. "Please remember," he said, rising. "My door is always open."

Jasper rose as well, shaking the Dean's hand, while he waved Bella back down when she moved to rise as well. When Dr. Harper had left and shut the door behind him, Jasper took his seat again.

Jasper and Bella sat quietly in the office for a few minutes, her small hand still curled around Jasper's. He smiled at her when she gave it a squeeze, just before a knock on the door, and Edward popped his head in.

"Mom's got lunch," he said softly, stepping into the room, leaving the door opened a crack behind him. He crossed the room behind them, then leaned his hips against his father's desk, crossing his arms lightly across his chest. "Everything okay?"

"The Board's going to want to speak with us," Jasper said as Bella still sat quietly.

"Are you in trouble?" Edward asked softly, frown lines appearing between his brows.

"No," Jasper answered with a shake of his head, running his thumb across Bella's knuckles again. "It's more of a debrief, I think."

Edward nodded. "Okay." He pushed off the desk and limped the few steps to stand in front of Bella. He took her free hand and held it with a soft smile before he leaned in and kissed her softly. She sniffled quietly and Edward eased her up from the chair, then took her place, tugging her down onto his lap, while she continued to hold Jasper's hand.

They continued to sit together for several minutes, once again not needing any words between the three of them. The peaceful silence was interrupted by a knock at the door, as Esme summoned them again for lunch.

Esme had apparently kept herself busy while everyone was otherwise occupied after breakfast, because the table was spread with several different kinds of salads, crackers, and breads.

"It's fairly simple," Esme was saying as Jasper supported Bella into the room. "Chicken salad, tuna salad, pasta salad…" she trailed off. She was trying very hard to be the caretaker Jasper knew she was and keep everything as normal as possible, but he had a feeling she knew she was going slightly overboard, too.

"It looks great, mom," Emmett assured her from across the table.

They all settled around the table and started passing the food around.

"So," Alice said quietly, though she smiled. "Jasper's birthday is next weekend…"

Normally, Jasper would have shushed her, but he supposed this once he could let it go and be the distraction the family needed. He hadn't observed his birthday in over a decade.

"We're going out of town," Edward answered, glancing over at Jasper. "But I suppose we could be back on Sunday in time for the dinner," he said thoughtfully.

"I think that would be a very good idea, son," Esme said, and Jasper could see she was fighting a smile. "I promise to help Alice keep it low-key," she said to Jasper.

"I'd appreciate that," Jasper said softly with a smile. "I suppose it's useless to say no gifts?"

"Pretty much," Carlisle said dryly.

Esme and Alice huffed, but everyone else laughed at the lighthearted moment. The rest of the meal passed in fairly light conversation and more teasing at Jasper's expense, as the oldest one in the group besides the parental figures. It was a nice change from the somber conversation that had taken place at breakfast, and the quiet pain everyone had been exuding when they'd gotten home Saturday evening. It gave Jasper some hope that the family, for the most part, would be able to move fairly easily forward.

After lunch, Emmett and Rosalie took everyone's dorm keys and made a run back to campus for clothes. They weren't gone long, and after everyone had dressed in their own clothes, they gathered around in the living room again and passed the afternoon watching movies and quietly talking. At 5:30, they all drove back to campus for the community wide dinner. They arrived late enough that they were able to get through the service area unmolested, though their entrance into the seating area was not unnoticed as a murmur rippled through the gathered community members as the Cullens found a table and took their seats.

Jasper suspected he looked as overwhelmed as he felt, since Bella and Edward both made a point to shift their chairs closer as they sat around their table. He wasn't one for the spotlight, especially when he still hadn't reconciled his actions for himself, and he knew that the general population of the academy was thinking him a hero.

He could hear the hushed conversations around them, and though Jasper couldn't pick out much, his and Bella's names were coming up fairly regularly. Jasper tried to block them out and focus on his dinner, and he could tell the attention was getting to Bella as well, as she hunched in on herself, trying to become less visible.

The conversation was short lived, however, as the public address system in the room squawked to life before Jasper could try to comfort his girlfriend.

"Ladies and gentlemen, can I have your attention, please?" the Dean's voice sounded from the speakers.

It took a moment for the dining room to settle down.

"As most of you are aware, there was an incident at the Writer's Conference yesterday. I won't go into details, but I do have a few things to say related to that incident. First, I'm immensely proud of all of you, for keeping your heads and following procedures. I wish we didn't have to, but we've done drills for this, and sadly, we've just had proof of how important those drills are for the continued safety of our community.

"Counselors will be available on campus tomorrow and throughout the week. Please make use of their services if you need them. Your first period teachers will have more information for you tomorrow, though an email went out late yesterday, so please check to see if your questions have been answered there.

"I'm sure you're all wondering about a few things that you've heard through the rumor mill. Let me hit the highlights. Lara Greene was not physically harmed, and has been released from the hospital. Her parents are here and hopefully she'll rejoin us next week. They've asked for some privacy for now, so if you have thoughts you'd like to pass long, please give them to Mrs. Cullen in the office beginning tomorrow morning.

"I've also spoken with Dr. Swan and Dr. Whitlock," Dr. Harper continued. "Neither was seriously hurt yesterday, and I believe both will be in classes tomorrow. As I know most of you have heard, the man responsible for yesterday's incident was killed by the police. As best as the police have been able to figure, he was looking to make contact with Dr. Swan and snuck in just as the lunch break was coming to an end. Dr. Whitlock and Dr. Swan kept Mr. Hunter speaking with them until the police could take the action they felt was necessary."

The hall was quiet as the Dean paused again. "What happened yesterday was traumatic and senseless, and I'm deeply grateful for Dr. Whitlock's quick thinking, and for the cool heads of everyone in that room. Fortunately, no one was seriously harmed, and as a community, we will move past this event. As a family, we will support each other. Look after each other. If you notice someone struggling, speak up. We are, unfortunately at times, an insular community, and we need to know that we can rely on and turn to one another. My door will always remain open, and the faculty will be available to you as well. Please use the resources available to you if you find yourself needing someone to speak to.

"With that, I'll let you get back to your meal and your studies. Have a pleasant evening."

The dining hall remained quiet for the span of a few heartbeats before the murmurs started again.

Bella hadn't really looked up during the dean's speech, and Jasper curled his hand lightly around her closest shoulder, and he could feel the tension in her muscles. "It's going to be okay, darlin'," he said under his breath in her direction. "Look," he said, nudging her lightly.

She lifted her head a bit and looked around the room. The students and other faculty had returned to their meals, and though there were occasional glances in their direction, for the most part, everyone was going back to their conversations. Jasper had a feeling that most people were too overwhelmed by what had happened on campus to actually approach them, unlike when James had confronted them in the fall, and only Bella had been at risk.

"I think they're going to give you some space, love," Edward added quietly. "Just breathe, okay?" he said with a small smile.

Bella nodded tightly, but didn't answer verbally.

"We're not gonna go anywhere," Jasper promised, as the rest of the family looked on. "You're not on your own with this, remember that, sweetheart."

"I know," she finally responded in a small voice.

Jasper watched as she picked at the rest of her dinner, though he understood her lack of appetite; he found himself in a similar situation.

When they finished eating, the family said their goodbyes, and it didn't escape Jasper's notice that Bella lingered a bit longer than normal in Esme's embrace, but he couldn't fault her for it. Before he broke from the group to return to his building (Emmett was accompanying Rosalie and the girls to their building), he made Bella promise to call him (or Edward) if she needed anything and Alice wasn't feeling up to it.

He huddled down into his coat as he made his way briskly back to his room; he had a feeling it was going to be another long night. He could feel the looks from the students he passed on his way across campus and did the best to ignore them. But the weight of the stares on his back caused him to hunch down a bit further in his coat and pick up his pace slightly.

As he approached his room, he frowned, seeing a large pile stacked up against his door. As he got closer, he realized it was paper. Puzzled, he stooped over to pick them up, shuffling all the papers (and what turned out to be note cards) into a pile to scoop up in his arms before he left himself in. He dropped the papers onto the bed, and ducked into the kitchenette. He nearly turned the kettle on, and decided to grab a bottle of water instead of making coffee.

Jasper plugged in his phone to charge, grabbed his laptop from the table and settled onto the bed, his curiosity at the pile of notes causing him to set the computer aside and begin sorting through them.

_Dr Whitlock,_

_I just needed to let you know...wanted to say Thank You. I'm grateful you were there._

_Thank you._

_Sarah_

**_Dear Dr. Whitlock,_**

**_I would like to express my heartfelt gratitude for taking control of the hostage situation the way that you did. Because of you, my life and the lives of countless other students were saved. Your courage has been demonstrated time and again, and Forks Academy couldn't ask for a finer instructor than you._**

**_  
Sincerely,_**

**_Emily_**

_Dear Dr. Whitlock,_

_Thank you so much for saving my life when I was at the writing conference. Not many people would have done what you did. I'm really glad that you stood up to that creep._

_Thanks again,_

_Jeff Rodgers_

**_Dr. Whitlock_**

**_I just want you to know how grateful I am for your action in the lecture hall. I am fairly certain that without your calm presence and level head, I would not be here today. That you would put your own life at risk to save mine, after what I had a hand in putting you through, truly speaks to the caliber of person you are. How does someone find the words to thank you for what you did?_**

**_It's not like me to write a note like this. As you have unfortunately learned first-hand, I'm a bit of a clown and I'm not usually this serious. I am just so amazed by what you did for us and am so glad that you were with us in that room. You were willing to sacrifice yourself to make sure that we got out safely, and it was the bravest thing I've ever seen. You see that kind of stuff in movies, but never think that someone would do that for you in real life. In a moment of total panic, your integrity was so apparent, and your control of the situation so impressive. _**

**_I will never forget what you did for us that day, and I will strive to be the kind of man you are._**

**_Sincerely, _**

**_Paul Young_**

_Dr. Whitlock,_

_I was one of the kids at that lecture, remember? Where you like, saved us all! I just wanted to say thank you. I'm not sure how many kids will, but I'm pretty sure they all are grateful. So yeah, thanks again; you're like, a hero!_

_Sincerely, _

_Kimberly Smithe_

**_Dear Dr. Whitlock,_**

**_I'm glad you were at the assembly. I was really scared, but you knew exactly what to say to James to get him to let all us students go. I don't know what would have happened if you weren't there, so I am super thankful you were._**

**_Sincerely,  
John Cowel_**

_Dr. Whitlock,_

_I'm not sure what I should write to you. I mean, "thank you" doesn't seem to be enough in return for what you did. I can honestly say I have never been more scared, and you risked your life to save people. Everyone was so scared, but you were so calm and made getting us out of there a priority._

_There are not enough words to convey how much I appreciate what you did for us. I guess I'm stuck with the only thing I can say: Thank you for everything you did for us, Lara, and Dr. Swan. We are all so happy you came to Forks Academy, and we all hope you'll be staying here with us._

_Sincerely,_

_Alice White_

**_Dear Dr. Whitlock, _**

**_Thank you so much for what you did the other afternoon when that horrible man came into Dr. Swan's lecture with the gun. It was so scary! I didn't know what to do! I was afraid he was going to go crazy and start shooting. My friends and I were so scared and nervous but happy when you took charge and started talking to the guy with the gun and got him to let us leave the room. That was so brave of you to stand up to him like that. We are so lucky that you were there that day. I hate to think of what might have happened without you._**

**_Sincerely,_**

**_Carrie Woods_**

Jasper found himself overwhelmed by the sentiments passed along by his students. He'd never gone into anything expecting praise or thanks; he'd always served out of his own sense of obligation to do so. When he had confronted James, any of the three times, it had been out of a desire to keep Bella safe, not because he felt like he needed to be a hero or wanted any kind of glory. But the simple and honest words of thanks that the students passed along went a long way toward helping him shed some of the guilt he'd been shouldering about taking the risks he had.

He was especially touched by the message he'd received from Paul. Though the kid had been trouble, Jasper had never wished him ill. Still, it was significant to Jasper that he'd done more than just get the kids out of a dangerous situation, but that he'd also, maybe, had an impact on their lives in a more positive way, if Paul's note was to be believed (and Jasper had no reason to doubt the kid's sincerity).

He spent the night quietly, reading and working on lesson plans, until Bella called him around one in the morning, and asked him to come over. Jasper packed up a small bag and left a note for Emmett (in case he came back from Rosalie's), before making his way back across campus.

* * *

Here I need to offer a special thanks to drtammy1511, chele, naelany, aradi, oscar519, and twilightmundi for their willingness to act like students and write little notes. You all rock, 'specially cause some of you aren't "writers," and I know what it takes to be brave enough to let someone publish something you wrote.


	48. Chapter 47: And So it Goes

**thank you as always to my fantastic beta team of Naelany and wishinforlove.**

**

* * *

  
**

Monday was a difficult day, and it set the tone for the rest of the week.

Edward's day had begun with him waking from troubled sleep, sweaty and panting from a nightmare where he was forced to watch James shoot Bella and Jasper, while Edward was paralyzed, unable to help. After that, the most vivid of the several dreams he'd had that night, Edward didn't bother going back to sleep. He assumed that Bella had gone to see Jasper, or had made it through the night on her own (he knew which was more likely), since she hadn't come to him. He had dragged himself from bed to get coffee started.

Edward spent the pre-dawn hours reading over his notes for the two classes he had to teach that day, trying to distract himself and focus on work that needed to be done. When his alarm sounded at seven (having agreed with Jasper that they'd skip the gym for at least that morning), he began his regular morning routine.

The night had been just as rough for Jasper and Bella, it appeared, when he met them for breakfast. It looked like neither one of them had gotten much sleep, though Jasper seemed to hide it a bit more successfully as he carried a tray for both of them. It saddened Edward to know that it was because Jasper'd had more practice hiding the evidence of his sleepless nights.

"Morning," Edward greeted Bella softly as she slid into the chair on his right.

"Hi." Her voice was subdued, and her eyes seemed slightly flat.

Edward hugged her awkwardly as Jasper took the chair on Bella's right.

"Here, sweetheart, it's mostly milk," Jasper said, passing a mug over to her with a concerned smile. "It's going to be a long day." Once she had the mug in her hands, Jasper slipped her oatmeal over.

"Thanks, Jas," she whispered.

"Anytime." Jasper reached for his own cup and took a long sip before shifting his plate of eggs, bacon, and toast in front of him. He ate with his right hand (though it didn't escape Edward's notice that he also pushed around quite a bit of food), his left comfortably resting on Bella's thigh.

"How was your night?" Edward asked softly, as he continued with his breakfast. He noticed students sparing them looks as they filed into the hall with their trays, and he did his best to ignore them.

"Not great," Bella admitted shyly. "Alice's still sick, and I was having nightmares, so Jasper came over," she continued. "I finally got to sleep around three this morning."

"I'm sorry, love," Edward said quietly, pressing a kiss to her temple.

She shrugged. "Not your fault."

"Not yours either," Jasper chimed in as she took a drink from her mug.

She nodded, and set the mug down, reaching for her spoon and idly mixing up her hot breakfast.

"Eat, Bella," Edward urged her quietly with a smile.

She glanced at him with a look that he interpreted as 'back off,' so he didn't push her any farther, but she did slowly begin to eat.

"Excuse me," Jasper said, rising from the table and pulling his phone from his pocket. He stepped away from the table, though Edward hadn't heard a phone ring.

"Are you sure everything's okay" Edward asked.

Bella shrugged again. "I don't know," she said. "I guess we'll just have to see how the day goes."

"You know where to find me if you need anything," he reminded her. "Jasper, too."

She gave him a watery smile and nodded. "I know."

Jasper returned to the table. "Dr. Jones can get me in after dinner," he said softly. "She said you're both welcome to join the session, if you'd like."

Edward nodded. "I would."

"I'll think about it," Bella answered. "I'm waiting to hear back from Dr. Stevens."

"Okay." Jasper kissed her temple.

Emmett and Rosalie joined them just then, and Emmett easily shifted them into conversation about his and Rosalie's plans for Spring Break the following month, and their wedding plans. Edward shot his bother a grateful look, and he could feel Bella begin to relax next him.

Edward ended up spending a small portion of the music theory class talking about what had happened on Saturday. None of his students had been there, but they all had questions. After class, he went, somewhat reluctantly, to physical therapy. He and Jane talked as she manipulated his body, mostly about his progress with the therapy. Jane offered to switch his schedule around to twice a week, since he was making such good progress, but he wanted to check in with Dr. Card before he made a decision. It was nice to focus on something other than school and the situation from Saturday, even for just a couple of hours.

Several of Edward's piano students cancelled their lessons for the day, citing a visit with the counselors the school had brought in. Despite his having cancelled lessons the week before, Edward didn't mind; if it helped them move past what had happened on what had previously been their safe campus community, then it was worth a few missed lessons. In music history, much like in his theory class that morning, Edward spent some time answering questions, though they eventually got around to the lesson for the day as well.

He wasn't quite as fortunate during the Wind Ensemble rehearsal.

Edward's students began streaming in, looking tired, which wasn't unusual for a Monday afternoon, but also a bit defeated. Several of them had been amongst the students Jasper had been able to get out of the room on Saturday afternoon, and he had a feeling that if he looked in the mirror, he might have a bit of the same look on his face.

Taking a look around, he made an announcement. "Why doesn't everyone just have a seat. Don't worry about sections, and don't get your instruments out," he called. He scrawled a note on the board to the students who hadn't arrived yet, and made his way back to his office. He left his scores and baton on his desk and grabbed the two bags of fun sized candies that were buried in the back of the bottom drawer of his desk.

The rest of the group had arrived by the time Edward returned. Some of the students had settled on the floor, and they were clumped together in groups of friends rather than sections, which was fine. Edward tore the bags open and started them on either end of the groups, allowing the students to take what they wanted.

Rather than settling in his conductor's chair on the podium, Edward grabbed one of the black rehearsal chairs and sat facing the students. Once everyone calmed, Edward began.

"We're going to keep things low-key today," he began. "I'm sure you all have questions or need to talk, so that's what we're going to do. We won't stay for the whole time, and when you're ready to leave, you can. So…what's up?"

There was a bit of nervous laughter, and Edward let the silence hang for a moment before someone spoke up.

"Is everyone really okay?"

Edward smiled and nodded. "Yes. Dr. Harper was telling the truth when he said no one was seriously hurt. Dr. Swan hurt her ankle, but she's okay, and Lara wasn't physically hurt."

The discussion took off from there, and Edward didn't have to say much more. The students largely talked amongst themselves, as a large group, and they comforted each other when needed. Edward answered questions tossed his way, and nodded at students who began to filter out after about forty-five minutes.

Edward finally shut off the lights in the rehearsal hall about half an hour before rehearsal would have normally ended. Though they had a concert in just over a month, he felt the time was better used in the talk, since the students had all seemed to be less weighed down when they'd left.

Knowing that Jasper had office hours right up until the time Edward's rehearsal was normally over, he bundled up in his coat and headed to the Humanities building to collect him and Bella for dinner.

When he reached their office, he peeked in through the small window to make sure neither Jasper or Bella was with a student. When he found them both studiously at their desks, Edward slipped into the office. Jasper looked up at the sound of the door opening and closing and he smiled softly at Edward, though there was something in his expression that warned Edward that something wasn't quite right.

"Hey," Edward called softly, announcing himself.

Bella looked up, and Edward could see what Jasper was worried about. She was pale and there were lines around her mouth and eyes that Edward didn't remember seeing at breakfast that morning. "Hi," she said quietly. "You're early?" she asked, sounding a bit confused.

"Yeah, rehearsal ended early, since they needed to talk and I could sacrifice the time. I thought I'd walk you to dinner," he explained.

"I'm about done," Jasper answered. "Bells?"

"Uhm. Yeah. Just need a minute," she stammered, turning back to her computer.

Jasper nodded and gave Edward another look, and he crossed the room to her desk, perching on the edge with his left hip, his cane dangling between his legs. He sat quietly while she finished, hearing Jasper begin to move around and pack things up behind him. "Everything okay, love?" he asked after a moment. She'd stopped working, her fingers poised over her keyboard while she stared vacantly at her monitor.

"Hm?" she blinked and looked over at him. "Oh. Yeah. Just tired."

"Well, how about a break for dinner?" he suggested. "Jasper looks starved," he said in a stage whisper.

"Okay," Bella said with a nod. She quickly powered everything down and shoved a pile of papers into her bag.

Edward slid from the desk and took her hand as she rose and came around the corner. Jasper joined them at the door and locked the office door behind them.

"Share a tray with me, love?" Edward asked Bella as they entered the serving area after swiping their I.D. cards at the entrance.

Bella nodded and stooped to pick a tray from one of the cubbies built into the cabinets that housed the serving stations. They made the rounds together and picked out food, and Edward wondered if Bella really suspected he was so unobservant to not notice how little food she'd taken for herself. But he remembered the look at breakfast that morning and he didn't push.

Bella carried their tray and they met back up with Jasper, who'd gone round the stations in the opposite order, and made their way to the regular table where they found Emmett, Rose, and a slightly healthier looking Alice.

"Hi, guys," Edward greeted them as they took their seats. "Feeling better?" he asked Alice.

His cousin shrugged. "A bit."

Jasper took the chair on Bella's other side.

"So," Emmett said, stabbing his fork into some pasta on his plate. "How'd it go today?"

Edward shrugged. "Okay, until rehearsal. Mostly stayed on track until then. You?"

Emmett nodded and swallowed. "Same. My students weren't too interested in asking me questions since I wasn't really involved."

"Hopefully I'll get back on track tomorrow," Jasper responded, shifting his plate and glass of water around on his tray. "We pretty much didn't get anything done today."

"Me either," Bella said softly. "Lots of tears in classes today," she confessed with a sad smile.

Jasper hugged her awkwardly from his seat and kissed her temple. "It'll blow over in a week or so," he said confidently.

"I hope so," Bella muttered.

Edward did too, for her sake. Since he knew she didn't want to talk about it anymore, he asked Alice about her upcoming art show, which pretty much occupied them for the rest of the meal, as they planned to help out as they could. Edward internally cheered when Bella volunteered to make cookies for the reception.

Bella picked at her meal, and Edward tried not to worry; she was upset and tired, and it was understandable that her appetite was off. He just didn't want her falling into old patterns again.

After dinner, Jasper drove them to his therapist's office. Bella had declined going, wanting to spend an evening with Alice, who was starting to feel better, and because she had her own appointment on Tuesday.

"I'm worried about her," Edward confessed quietly in the car. He didn't need to specify, because he knew Jasper would understand who he was talking about.

"Me too," Jasper answered. "But I think we're just going to have to give her some time," he said thoughtfully. "The man she thought she loved did something that put not only her, but her family and students at risk. That's a big thing to wrap your head around," he explained.

Edward nodded. "Yeah, I know," he said on a sigh.

Jasper took his hand across the console. "We'll ask Dr. Jones about what we can do, okay?"

Edward nodded again and gave Jasper's fingers a squeeze as they pulled into the lot of what looked like a business park.

Jasper led him up to a nondescript door, and they were greeted by a young man blonde behind a desk. "Hi, Dr. Whitlock. She's running a few minutes behind, but she's cleared a couple hours for you. Can I get you anything?"

"Thanks, Riley. If you've got coffee made, please, if not, don't worry about it," Jasper said.

"Just started a pot for Dr. Jones," Riley answered easily. "I know Dr. Whitlock takes his coffee black…" he said to Edward.

"Edward Cullen, and cream and sugar would be perfect, thanks," he answered as he and Jasper took a seat in the plush chairs along the wall.

Riley smiled and nodded. "Be right back. I'll let her know you're here."

Edward took the opportunity to glance around the waiting area. Each of the four walls was painted a different color, all muted pastel shades of blue, green, lavender, and a honey-beige yellow. The art on the walls were mostly nature scenes that coordinated with the colors of the respective walls. Overall, it had a very soothing and calming effect, and though his mom dabbled in interior design before she'd taken the job at Forks Academy after he'd left for college, he'd never put much stock in such things, so it was somewhat surprising that he found himself beginning to relax as Riley brought out two ceramic mugs and handed them over.

Edward accepted his with a quiet thanks, just as a door opened and a man emerged. "Ah. You can go on in," Riley said as he returned to the desk.

Jasper stood and offered Edward a hand up, which he took. They crossed to the door that was pretty well concealed in the wall and Jasper knocked before they stepped through.

"Hello, Jasper," a woman, Dr. Jones, Edward presumed, greeted them. "And you must be Edward," she said with a soft smile, sliding off her black plastic rimmed glasses. She was older, her black hair tastefully streaked with grey, with an easy smile. She rose from behind her desk, revealing a pair of scrub trousers and Birkenstock sandals, which he'd not expected from the nice sweater and pearls.

"Yes," Edward said, sliding his cane back over his forearm to extend his left hand. "Nice to meet you."

"You too," she said, giving his hand a firm squeeze before pointing them toward a sofa against the wall, as she folded herself into an armchair set across from it, tucking one leg up underneath her, like how Alice liked to sit. "I've heard a lot about you."

"Good, I hope," Edward teased as he sat next to Jasper, hearing his partner's soft laughter.

"Mostly," she responded with an easy smile. She pulled a notepad from the table next to her chair and slipped her glasses back on. "So, I saw the news this weekend, so I can guess what this call was about," she began, looking at Jasper. "Want to start?"

Jasper nodded. He relayed the story of what happened on Saturday after he filled her in on the background leading up to the situation.

"It sounds like you acted very bravely, and kept control of a dangerous situation," Dr. Jones responded after Jasper had finished.

"Yeah," Jasper said. "But I still feel responsible for what happened, in a way. I know it's not really logical," he explained, and Edward slipped his hand into Jasper's. "But if I hadn't split up the fight that Bella and James had back at the beginning of the year, maybe none of this would have happened."

"True," the doctor agreed with a nod and a thoughtful look. "But would you have ever forgiven yourself for not stepping in if Bella had been hurt by James before now?"

It was something Edward had been trying to convey to Jasper since that first event.

"No," Jasper answered after a moment, looking down at his feet against the plush beige carpet.

"No one was hurt, right Edward?" she asked turning her attention to him.

"Correct," Edward answered slowly.

"What's your take on things?" she asked.

Edward took a deep breath. "I think that Jasper did everything he could to make sure that the students were safe. I think that he weighed his options and instead of taking action that could have put others in harm's way by using the gun he'd taken off of James' partner, he kept him talking so the police could do their jobs. I think that he saved Bella's, Lara's, and mine and my family's lives, along with all the other visitors on campus that day. The only thing I wish he'd done differently is to not feel so guilty about it."

Jasper looked over at Edward, and he could feel the weight of Dr. Jones eyes on him as well. "I've been trying to tell you that for two days," Edward said softly.

"Edward's right, Jasper," Dr. Jones said. "Now, I know it's not quite that simple, so why don't you tell me why you feel so badly for something you did right."

They continued to talk for another hour and a half. Edward had a chance to talk about a couple of things as well, and they both asked about Bella, and how they might be able to help her. They were encouraged to be gentle, but try to get her to talk, and to try not to let her fall into self destructive behavior, like turning to drugs or alcohol. Dr. Jones agreed that probably the best short term solution, given their living situation, might be to switch off spending evenings with her, so they'd all have a chance to talk and get a good night's sleep, being able to count on a loving partner to be there.

All in all, Edward decided the experience was a helpful one, and he gracefully accepted Dr. Jones' invitation to crash any of Jasper's regular appointments, if he wanted, and if Jasper didn't mind. Through the conversation, he'd discovered that, once again, he was in the position as the emotional rock for the three of them. Even though Edward had been terrified for Jasper and Bella while James had held a gun on them, Edward himself hadn't felt in much immediate danger, and after speaking with Dr. Jones while Jasper was in the room, he felt much better about being able to handle not only his own feelings, but Bella and Jasper's as well.

On the ride home, Jasper seemed much more relaxed and at peace with himself. They stopped at the grocery store bakery and picked up a couple of brownies before returning to campus. They checked on Bella, who was spending the evening with Alice, and left them the brownies before splitting up to their own rooms and getting on with some work that had been put off for the weekend.

Tuesday and Wednesday went a little better. The students seemed more back to themselves, and Edward's classes got back on track with lessons. His piano students started turning up again, and he even felt like his physical therapy went a bit better on Wednesday morning.

Bella spent Tuesday night, after her appointment with her counselor, with Edward. She finally admitted at dinner that she was having trouble sleeping, and though neither of them would turn her away, they agreed that it would be too hard for the three of them to share the small beds. Bella had appealed to her hall-mates (which included Alice and Rosalie) and had her responsibilities transferred to them for the week, so that she could get the sleep she needed. Tuesday was rough, however, and Edward spent a lot of the night holding her as she quietly cried, sleeping only short snatches at a time.

The campus community continued to be nothing but supportive. Jasper had shown Edward (and Bella) the pile of notes he'd received from students and faculty across the campus. They'd truly humbled Jasper, Edward knew. Jasper still struggled with feeling guilty about the way he'd handled things, even after speaking with Dr. Jones, but a conversation with Lara seemed to have helped put a stop to that.

On Wednesday, Lara had invited Jasper and Bella to meet with her and her parents, but Bella had declined, opting instead to send a note along with Jasper. Personally, Edward felt that she should have gone, that it might have helped her begin to understand that she truly wasn't responsible, but he also knew that pushing her toward something she wasn't ready for would be a bad idea. Edward didn't read the note that she wrote, and didn't pressure Bella into telling him what she'd written, but she seemed somehow lighter after passing it off, for an hour or two, anyway. When Jasper returned from the meeting he was in a better mood, and Edward didn't ask him to share what they had talked about.

Wednesday night Bella was with Jasper, but again, from their appearances at breakfast, it looked like they hadn't slept much. By the time dinner rolled around, she looked listless and pale, and Jasper was so anxious he was practically vibrating at Edward's side. Her determination to power through was commendable, but Edward could clearly see the strain on her body. She wasn't eating again. He and Jasper did what they could, but Edward wasn't sure it was enough.

It all came crashing down on Thursday night.

Bella had hardly eaten any dinner, and because she hadn't been sleeping much, she'd been drinking coffee (heavily diluted with milk, but still coffee), which, due to her sensitivity to caffeine, had left her a bit twitchy and irritable. Edward and Jasper had tried to tempt her with a number of her favorites that had been available in the dining hall that night, but she'd sniped at them to leave her alone, that she wasn't hungry.

"Alright, no more caffeine for you, sweetheart," Jasper said lightly with a half smile, though Edward could see the hurt in his eyes. Jasper gently tugged her mug away and slid over his glass of water instead.

Bella sighed but nodded, a flush lighting her cheeks as she poked at her dinner.

"So, this weekend?" Alice said, back to her normal self. "Ready to get out of town for a few days?"

Jasper nodded. "Even if it has to be at my expense. Remember what I said about the singing," he reminded Edward.

"Yeah, yeah," Edward answered on a sigh with a smile. "Whatever."

Emmett and Rose laughed, and even Bella managed to crack a smile. If only Jasper knew; Edward had booked dinner reservations for Saturday night that included a special birthday presentation by the restaurant staff. He had found the plans to be a good way of distracting Bella throughout the week when her thoughts started to drift back to the weekend, or other things. They talked for awhile longer and Edward continued to watch from the corner of his eye as Bella remained quiet and withdrawn.

"I have to get going," Jasper said regretfully. "I'll see you two later?" he asked Edward and Bella quietly.

"We'll be in my room," Bella said softly.

Jasper nodded. He kissed her cheek and Edward's temple after he lifted his tray. "History club got cancelled for this week, so I'll see you in a couple hours."

"Okay," Edward answered with a small smile when Jasper squeezed his shoulder.

When they'd all finished eating (or in Bella's case, poking at her food), Edward walked Bella back to her building, Alice and Rosalie in tow. The plan was to work on catching up on grading homework assignments until Jasper returned, or until Bella passed out (Edward hadn't filled her in on i_that_/i part of the plan). Rose split from them on the first floor while Edward trooped up the stairs with Bella and Alice.

Bella remained quiet as she let them into her room. Alice silently wrapped her hand around Edward's wrist and gave it a gentle squeeze of support before she went into her room. Edward trailed Bella into her room, watching as she tossed her bag onto the foot of her bed and then crossed to her bureau. He didn't say anything as she stripped out of her professional looking clothes and changed into a pair of ratty sweatpants and the hoodie she'd stolen from Jasper earlier in the week.

"Can I get you anything, love?" Edward asked softly, setting his bag gently on the table.

She shook her head. "I'm fine."

"Okay." Edward was at a loss. They were doing everything that Dr. Jones had suggested, encouraging Bella to talk, trying to keep her from returning to the behaviors that she'd fallen into with James, but he could feel her slipping away and he didn't know what to do.

So while she ducked into the bathroom, he stripped off his coat and hung it, with is cane, on the back of the chair and settled at the table, pulling his bag toward him. He had homework from both of his academic classes to grade, and he needed to start working on evaluations for his piano students.

Bella crept back into the room quietly and folded herself up into a corner of her bed, reaching for her bag as well. A comfortable silence filled the room as they both worked, though Edward watched her carefully as she slowly began to settle, the caffeine apparently beginning to fade from her system. Like earlier in the week, when he'd caught her staring absently at the screen on her computer, Bella's eyes would occasionally glaze over, and her hand, pen between her fingers, would freeze for long minutes before she'd give herself a gentle shake and go back to work.

Edward could hear the quiet strains of music from Alice's room through the open connective door on Bella's side of the suite, though Alice's was closed. It was just enough noise to not make things feel oppressive as Edward's worry spiked and he fought to tamp it down.

"Hey." Jasper's voice broke the silence as he stepped into the room.

Edward turned to face him, seeing a plastic bag in one hand, his messenger bag over his shoulder, and the semi-familiar slightly haunted look that Jasper sometimes had when he got back from therapy. "Hey. How'd it go?"

Jasper shrugged as he dropped the bag on the table and kissed Edward softly before taking his coat off. "Fine." He hung his coat on the corner of Bella's closet and stepped up to her, kissing her softly as well. "Hey, sweetheart," he said softly.

"Hi, Jazzy," she muttered. She didn't sound at all excited to see him.

"Bad assignment?" he asked as he settled next to her on the bed and gave her a one armed hug. Edward was jealous of his partner's ability to make everything seem normal in that moment, when it was very apparent that everything was far from status quo. It had been a long enough week that Edward wasn't sure they'd ever get back to that.

Bella shrugged.

"Wanna take a break?" Jasper asked, Edward watching from his post at the table as he fingered a lock of her hair and gave it an affectionate tug; the gesture had turned into something meaningful for them, a quiet way of showing affection when they otherwise shouldn't or couldn't. "I stopped off at the grocery store on my way home, and there's a chocolate cupcake, literally with your name on it over there," he said, nodding toward the table.

"No thanks," she said quietly.

Edward had opened the bag as Jasper had spoken and pulled out three huge cupcakes. Two were chocolate, and one, true to Jasper's words, had Bella's name scrawled across the tower of icing in purple. The other had white frosting, and if he had to guess, would say it was probably carrot cake for Jasper.

"Are you sure? This looks divine, love," Edward said with a grin. Though she didn't eat sweets quite at the level of Edward and his brother, she rarely passed up chocolate.

She sighed. "I'm sure."

"Bella," Jasper chided gently.

Bella sighed again and slammed her stack of papers down. "I don't want it. I'm not hungry. And I wish the two of you would lay the fuck off." She shrugged Jasper's arm off her shoulders and slid from the bed.

"We're worried about you, Bella," Edward said quietly, his work forgotten as he watched her pace around the room, all the agitation that had drained from her while they'd worked flooding back into her system.

"I'm i_fine_/i," she all but growled.

"Honey, you're not," Jasper said gently as he rose smoothly from the bed as well. He didn't follow her so much as find an empty space on the wall to lean and tracked her movements. "You're not eatin', and you're not sleepin', and you're not talkin' to us," he spelled out, and Edward heard his normally faded accent grow thicker as his emotions began to rise.

"What's there to talk about?" she asked dryly. "I feel like you're always around this week."

Edward felt somewhat like he'd been slapped. "You don't want us around?"

She sighed and fluttered her hands around for a moment before using them to twist her hair up on the back of her head before letting it fall around her shoulders. "Argh. That's not what I meant," she growled, clearly frustrated.

"Talk to us, sweetheart," Jasper urged her quietly. "We can't help you if you don't talk to us."

"Why can't you just leave me alone?" she whispered, a pleading edge to her voice that cracked Edward's heart open a little bit.

"Because we love you, and we're worried about you," Edward answered, seeing Jasper's nod in the corner of his eye as he also followed Bella's pacing around the room.

"I don't want you to," she whispered.

"Which part?" Jasper asked, his voice flat. "I'm not sure either is really an option, though."

"Bella, love," Edward said, rising, bracing himself on the table, then the chair for balance before he reached for his cane and leaned on it. "We worry because we love you, and we can't really turn those things off. We just want to make sure you're okay, and right now, you're not."

"What do you want, Bella?" Jasper asked when Bella didn't respond to Edward's statement.

"Stop treating me like I'm going to break!" she shouted. The sudden flare of emotions was startling.

"We're not trying to, sweetheart," Jasper tried to console her. "You're hurting, and you're locking us out. We just want to try to help."

"Then leave me the fuck alone!" She cried. "Don't you get it yet? Everyone who ever gets close to me gets taken away somehow."

"Bella, honey, we're not going anywhere," Edward said, taken aback by her outburst and swearing.

"You can't i_say_/i that! No one can promise that. You could get hit by a car tomorrow, or another asshole could come on campus with a gun. It's not safe around me!" She yelled.

Jasper moved to embrace her, probably to calm her down, but she lashed out and slapped his chest. "Stay away!" she screamed.

Edward flinched and he stepped closer, wanting to help somehow.

"Bella, sweetheart," Jasper said softly, reaching out for her.

"No! You don't fucking i_get it_/i!" She hit him again, slapping his arm away.

"I get it, sweetheart," Jasper said quietly. "You're tired, and you're scared. You were threatened, and people you love were in danger, and you think it's your fault. But you can't shut us out like this, honey. We're aren't going anywhere. You're not going to scare us away behaving like this. It just makes us worry. But if it makes you feel better, get it out. Cry, scream, whatever," he urged her, his voice still eerily calm. "Anything's got to be better than this shell you've been this week." He moved slowly and reached for her.

She slapped his hand away before she let loose a bone-chilling cry. Bella started beating on Jasper's chest with closed fists, and as Edward stepped forward, horrified, to pull her away, Jasper shot him a dark look with a shake of his head. Edward felt slightly ill as he stood by and watched her hit Jasper as she screamed and yelled out her fury, fear, and frustration. Each time Jasper winced Edward shifted forward, ready to pull her away, but Jasper's features shifted back to his calm façade and his blue eyes, the only thing that showed the hurts he was experiencing, locked on Edward's, and he shook his head. Jasper kept his hands at his sides, while Edward's itched to reach out to either one of them.

She quickly began to lose energy , and Bella's hits eventually turned into open handed slaps, and Jasper took them, like he had her hits, with an ease that disturbed Edward, his hands moving to lightly rest on Bella's hips, though he made no move to restrain her. Her yells slowly shifted into heart-wrenching sobs and she fell against Jasper's chest.

Jasper cradled her against him. Edward crossed the room in quick strides and wrapped his arms around Bella from behind, sandwiching her between them. They both gave her what physical comfort they could in that moment. Jasper's lips were at her ear as he whispered quietly to her, his words lost in the harsh sounds of her sobs, while Edward held them both and pressed light kisses to the top of her head or the back of her neck.

After several long moments (Edward couldn't say for sure how long), the strings keeping Bella uprightly finally seemed to break and Jasper caught her easily, scooping her up into his arms before she could slide too far.

"Emmett should be home," Jasper said quietly, shifting Bella easily. "Can you call him and see if he can grab my guitar and a change of clothes and bring them over?"

"Do you want the others, Bella?" Edward asked, digging his phone from his pocket, prepared to call his brother. He was surprised Alice hadn't come over with all the noise.

She never opened her eyes, but she nodded slightly, after a moment's hesitation. He called his brother and quickly relayed the situation. Emmett said he'd stop by Edward's room too, and grab Rose. Jasper moved slowly and eased himself down onto Bella's bed, still holding her close against his chest.

Edward looked up at a tap on the door as he was putting his phone away.

Alice stood in the doorway, her green eyes wide and red, evidence of tears on her cheeks. "Can I…?" She didn't finish her question.

Edward nodded and Alice crept into the room. He watched her cross to the bed and saw Jasper say something quietly to Bella. Her eyes opened and she all but threw herself into Alice's arms with a sob when she'd settled on the bed. Jasper smiled softly and rose, passing Edward and going into the shared space between Bella and Alice's room.

Alice nodded at Edward and he took the hint, following Jasper and closing the door almost all the way behind him.

"Are you okay?" Edward asked Jasper quietly as his partner filled the electric kettle on the counter and set it back on the base.

Jasper nodded. "She didn't hurt me."

Edward reached for his hand and gently tugged, wordlessly urging Jasper to turn around. "That's not what I meant," he said softly, dropping his cane and using his left hand to run his thumb over Jasper's cheekbones, under his eyes. Jasper's eyes were dark and stormy.

"I don't like that she's hurting so much," Jasper said in a harsh whisper. "I can't i_fix_/i this," he said brokenly.

Edward tugged on his hand again and pulled Jasper into a hug after he kissed him softly. "I don't know that either of us can," Edward breathed against Jasper's cheek. "All we can do is be here for her and encourage her to talk, either to us, or Dr. Stevens, or mom and dad," he said.

Jasper nodded against him. "I don't expect her to heal fast, and it's only been a few days, but I don't know how to help," he said softly with a sigh. "She's closing herself off, and fuck, Edward, if that's what I've done to you in the past…"

"Sh," Edward said, holding him just a bit tighter. "Yeah, it was," he said honestly, knowing trying to dismiss it wouldn't help anything. "But that's how you've coped for so long, Jas. I don't expect you to change that. Bella's trying to cope the only way she knows how, which is to not be a burden on anyone else. Where you didn't have anyone to turn to, she honestly feels like she's being a bother if she asks for help. All we can do is show her that she's wrong, that it's not a bother for us to be there for her."

Jasper nodded again. "I know, baby," he said, sounding defeated. "I'm just not used to feeling helpless."

Edward let the bubble of humorless laughter burst from him. "No, you're not," he agreed. The kettle clicked off on the counter, and Edward kissed Jasper again before letting him go.

Jasper stepped away, but left their hands twined together as he rooted through Alice and Bella's cabinets looking for tea and enough mugs for everyone. "She's almost out of tea," Jasper sighed.

"I'll grab some when I'm out for therapy tomorrow morning," Edward answered. "I don't have a lesson before I see Jane, so I have some time. Do you need anything?"

Jasper shook his head as he gave Edward's hand a squeeze, then let him go so he could use both hands. "No, not if we're going out of town this weekend."

Edward nodded, stooped to pick up his cane, and limped forward to help Jasper with the cups.

"Hey, bro, Jas-man," Emmett said, coming through from Alice's side of the suite behind Rose, who spared them both a look before passing through to find the girls. "Here." Emmett handed Jasper the battered case of his guitar, and slipped a duffel bag from his shoulder. "I can't stay," he said regretfully. "I've got a bunch of work I have to get finished for class tomorrow. I'll say hi to Bells, though."

Edward nodded. He understood. He and Jasper had put a lot of their own work aside for the week so they could lean on each other to get through everything; it was unreasonable of him to expect everyone else to do the same.

He and Jasper followed Emmett through to Bella's side of the room, Jasper carrying three of the mugs. Edward had claimed his own.

Bella was cuddled between Alice and Rose, and all of them looked to have been crying. Emmett crossed the room and knelt down in front of them. "Hey, li'l girl," he said fondly, reaching out to gently tuck a strand of hair behind Bella's ear. "I can't stay tonight, but you know you just have to call me if you need your big brother, alright?"

Bella nodded.

Emmett stretched up slightly and kissed her forehead. "You make sure those two take good care of you, okay? I'll kick their asses if they don't." That coaxed a small smile from her, even if it looked more sad than anything. "I love you kid, you know that, right?"

"Yeah, Em," she whispered. "Love you too."

"Of course you do," Emmett said cockily as he rose. Even if Edward could understand why Emmett couldn't stay, his lighthearted nature would be missed as they tried to get through the night. Emmett clapped Jasper on the shoulder, then drew Edward into a rough 'man hug.' "I called dad, in case you need anything," Emmett said softly. "Call me if you need me, but you've probably got it handled."

"I will. Thanks, Em."

"Anytime, bro," Emmett answered, and showed himself out.

When Edward turned back around, Rose was making her apologizes as well. "I'm sorry, honey, but I'm supposed to be on duty tonight," she apologized, finger-combing through Bella's hair. "But I'm right downstairs, and you can send one of the boys down to get me if you need anything."

"Okay," Bella said softly.

Rose kissed her cheek and gave her another lingering hug before slipping from the bed. She pressed her lips to Edward and Jasper's cheeks on her way out, as well.

"Come on, sweetheart, let's get you cleaned up and then the boys can look after you, okay?" Alice suggested gently. Bella nodded and let Alice help her up from the bed, and they went into the bathroom arm and arm.

"How did things get so fucked up?" Jasper asked quietly, sliding his arms around Edward's waist and resting his chin on Edward's shoulder.

Edward shifted his weight off his cane and back into Jasper. "I don't know, baby," he answered. "But we'll fix it, somehow, I promise."

Jasper hummed an agreement in Edward's ear and they just stood together until Alice led a sheepish looking Bella back into her room. Her hair had been combed and pulled back into two loose braids and her face had been scrubbed clean, leaving her pink cheeked, though her eyes were still watery. Jasper released Edward and crossed to Bella, who was practically clinging to Alice for dear life.

"Come here, sweetheart," Jasper invited, holding his arms open for her.

She went slowly, shuffling her socked feet until she was close enough for Jasper to tug her against his chest. "I'm sorry," she sobbed.

"Sh, it's okay," he soothed her, hugging her close.

"I'm going to go," Alice said softly to Edward. "She wants to talk to you guys, and you might want to be ready to call Carlisle for something to help her sleep."

"Okay," Edward said with a nod, pulling his cousin into a hug. He kissed the top of her head. "You okay?"

She nodded tightly. "Yeah," she said softly with a sad smile. "I'll keep my door open if you need me."

"Thanks."

Alice hugged him back, tiptoed up and kissed his cheek before disappearing back through the common area to her own room.

Bella was still crying softly as Jasper rocked her gently as they stood. "Come on, loves, sit down," Edward urged quietly.

Jasper easily scooped up Bella and carried her to the bed, and the three of them sat close together, Bella cradled between the two men. They were quiet for a few minutes, other than Bella's soft sniffles, until she started speaking.

"I'm sorry," she said softly, looking down at her hands, curled in her lap. "I shouldn't have reacted that way."

"Bella, I want you to listen to me," Jasper said softly, but in a firm voice. "In a way, I'm glad you lashed out at me. No," he said when she started to interrupt. "Let me finish. There is nothing wrong with telling us how you feel or asking for help. It's not burden for us to talk to you to take care of you," he explained softly. "But sweetheart, even though we can see that you're hurting, you have to tell us where, so we can find the right band-aide."

Bella nodded and one side of her mouth quirked up in an attempt at a smile.

"We're not mind readers," Edward continued gently. "We may have been there and know what happened, but that only helps us so far in helping you come to terms with all of that for yourself."

"Now, I don't care that you hit me," Jasper said.

"I do," Edward said flatly, cutting him off.

Jasper kissed Edward's temple behind Bella's back. "I don't care because you weren't trying to hurt me, were you, Bells?"

She shook her head 'no.' "I was scared."

"What were you scared of?" Edward asked.

"Of losing you," she said softly. "I – you're – " she sighed. "I feel like I should be past this already. You both seem so unbothered by what happened."

"You know that's not true," Edward started but Bella pressed her fingertips to his mouth and he quieted, allowing her to continue.

"If I could push you away, I wouldn't have to risk you leaving because I turned into an emotional wreck. I love you both, but I don't know if I could stand it if you walked away from me because of this. Even if part of me thinks you should."

"Why do you think we should?" Jasper asked gently. Edward knew right away he wasn't going to like the answer.

"You're both such good men – you don't need to be saddled with my baggage."

"Stop," Edward said sharply. "Stop thinking that way right now," he said. He cleared his throat and consciously tried to soften his tone. "Bella, love, we're not without baggage here. What matters is that we're here to support you. We love you, and all your issues. Hell, if Jasper can put up with my mood swings and I can live with Jasper's tendencies to hide from things or run himself exhausted, we can figure out a way to work with your insecurities and fears of being abandoned."

"I think what Edward means to say," Jasper said with a sidelong look at Edward, a smile tugging at his lips, "Is that we have our own problems, too, and it doesn't mean that you love us any less, right?"

Bella sniffled and nodded.

"So why would it make any difference to us?" Edward asked, picking up on the thread of Jasper's thought. "Honey, we love i_you_/i. We'll figure out all the rest."

"I know, but…" Bella sighed and wiped away fresh tears. "Sometimes what we know and what we think don't match up."

Jasper kissed the top of her head. "We know, sweetheart. But it goes back to what we said earlier; you have to talk to us, so we can know what's going on inside of that pretty little head of yours."

"I'll try," she whispered.

"Will you try something else for me?" Edward asked.

"Hm?" Bella answered, turning her wide, red-rimmed brown eyes on him.

"These cupcakes are really good." Edward pouted a little at her. "But it would make me uncomfortable to have to eat one in front of you unless you had one, too."

"Okay," she said quietly, a smile tugging at her lips.

"Thank you," Jasper said quietly. He kissed her neck then lightly shifted her off his lap. Jasper crossed to the table and came back with the cupcakes. He handed the two to Edward and Bella. "I'm going to change and clean up."

"I think I will, too," Edward responded. He kissed Bella tenderly, threading his fingers into her hair. She returned the kiss and her eyes looked lighter when he pulled away. "I'll be right back."

Bella nodded and took the plastic lid off the cupcake as Edward rose and he smiled as she dragged her fingertip through the icing and slowly raised it to her lips.

Once they had changed, Jasper settled on the floor near the head of her bed with his guitar. Bella and Edward curled up together in her bed, Edward sitting up against the wall with Bella laying against his chest. They picked at their cupcakes while Jasper played.

"Maybe we shouldn't go out of town this weekend," Jasper suggested. "Darlin', I really think you need to keep your regular appointment with Dr. Stevens."

"But your birthday…" Bella trailed off, licking crumbs off her fingers.

Jasper turned and stretched up slightly to kiss her softly. "I haven't celebrated my birthday for ten years, sweetheart. One more isn't going to matter, and you're much more important to me than a weekend in Seattle. Besides," he said with a wink and a grin. "Think of how happy it'd make Esme and Alice."

Bella smiled at that. "Yeah."

"And I'd appreciate not having to spend more than three hours in a car again for awhile," Edward added, throwing his support behind Jasper's idea. It would probably be better for them to stay home for the weekend, and Edward could make some arrangements that would still allow them to have some quiet time together Saturday night.

"Okay," Bella finally conceded. "We'll have to do it some other time."

"I promise, I'll let you make it up to me," Jasper teased lightly.

Edward laughed quietly as Bella nudged his shoulder with her foot. "You'd better," she said.

Jasper continued to play quietly for a few minutes. "What's everyone got going on next week?" he asked quietly over a soft melody.

"Why? Got plans?" Edward teased.

"Yes. I met this beautiful girl, and I'm going to run away with her and seduce her," Jasper said, completely deadpan. "She's a world famous author who I only recently discovered lived in the area."

Bella giggled softly and turned her face into Edward's chest for a moment. Edward rolled his eyes, but he was once again grateful for Jasper's ability to read a situation and make things easier. "I've got the Seattle Symphony visiting on Friday, but that's the only thing that's different in my schedule. You?"

Jasper nodded. "Swim meet on Saturday."

Edward gave Bella a gentle squeeze. "Anything for you?"

Bella shrugged. "Not really, other than getting back on track with the creative writing club, that got put off for the last two weeks with everything," she said softly.

Edward kissed her temple. "They'll understand."

"I know." Bella snuggled just a bit deeper into his arms, pushing aside the crumbs of the cupcake that she'd mostly eaten while picking it apart. "Alice has her art show in two weeks, too," she reminded them.

Jasper nodded. "I'd almost forgotten. I need to start keeping a calendar if I'm going to keep up with y'all," he teased, and Edward smiled as he listened to his partner intentionally thicken his accent. "It's been a long time since I've had to keep track of what other people were up to."

"I'll get you one for your birthday," Bella promised.

"Or better yet, we should get you a crack-berry or an iPhone or something," Edward mused.

"A what?" Jasper asked with a laugh.

"Blackberry," Bella answered, smirking up at Edward. "Some people get addicted to them, or rather, being able to be connected all the time."

"Ah." Jasper nodded his understanding. "I think you probably shouldn't waste your money, babe. I really have no need or desire to be that connected to the rest of the world. My iPod and my laptop are just fine."

Edward decided to hold back on commenting on how Jasper could stand to have his laptop upgraded as well. That would be something he knew would best be done and presented to Jasper rather than try to talk about it; Jasper'd refuse the offer as unnecessary, Edward knew. He continued to listen to Jasper play softly under their conversation, admiring the ease with which Jasper played, seemingly uncaring of whether or not he was perfect. It was something Edward had never mastered.

"You know, we really should put that combo together for the concert next month," Edward mused as Jasper played a light Spanish-style melody.

"Who are you thinking of?" Jasper asked.

Bella smiled softly where she was curled up in Edward's arms and he kissed the top of her head. "Me. You. Dave plays bass, and I would see what other instrumental teachers are interested."

Jasper nodded. "Put a set together and see who signs up. I'm good for it."

Edward smiled. "Small set."

Jasper laughed quietly. "It's your show, babe."

"Nudge him again for me, sweetheart," Edward said to Bella, who complied.

Jasper continued to play his guitar as they finished up their cupcakes and while Bella got ready for bed. Once she was tucked up and comfortable, curled up once more against Edward's chest while he sat against the head of the bed, the tone of the music changed to soothing, taking on the qualities of a lullaby. Bella slowly relaxed and drifted off under Edward's gentle caresses and Jasper's music.

When Bella was firmly asleep, Jasper rose easily from the floor. He kissed them both softly after he set his guitar aside. "I'm going to see if Alice has any spare blankets and pillows," he said softly.

"Jas-"

"The floor won't kill me for one night," Jasper assured him quietly. With the way Edward and Bella were settled it would make it difficult for Jasper to share the bed with them. "I'm not leaving tonight."

Edward nodded. Jasper stepped away and over the sounds of Bella's even breathing he heard the murmurs of Jasper and Alice speaking in the other room. Bella stirred slightly in Edward's arms and he shushed her, his hand going under her shirt to rub circles into the base of her spine. She sighed softly and stilled.

Jasper returned a moment later with a couple blankets and a pillow piled in his arms, and he set about making up a nest on the floor. Once his makeshift bed was set up, Jasper shut off the lights. Before he settled down he kissed Bella softly, and then Edward, caressing his cheek lightly. "Get some sleep, baby," Jasper whispered.

"You too," Edward responded. "If it gets uncomfortable…"

Jasper smiled. "I know." He kissed Edward again and stepped back, slipping out of view. Edward heard the rustle of blankets as Jasper settled down for the night.

Edward nudged Bella gently, hoping to get her to shift into a more comfortable position for him to sleep. She murmured quietly but let Edward hold her as he slid down from his seated position against the wall, and curled into his body once Edward was laying flat.

With everything that had happened through the week and that evening, it didn't take long for Edward to slip into an exhausted sleep.

Edward was woken on Friday morning with fresh coffee and the glasses that Emmett hadn't thought to grab from his room when he'd packed up a few things for Edward the night before. Jasper admitted to being up early and stealing his keys when he realized that Emmett had also not brought over Edward's painkillers.

They quickly rotated through the shower, and Bella looked more well rested than she had all week; Edward supposed she'd managed to sleep through the night, since she hadn't woken him with nightmares like she had earlier in the week. Breakfast went better than most of the meals that week, with Bella tentatively eating an egg and a slice of toast with juice. It wasn't much, but it was more than Edward had seen her eat for the week (and she actually admitted to being hungry).

When Jasper told her about the change in plans for his birthday, Alice was ecstatic to hear that she'd be allowed to throw Jasper the birthday party she'd wanted to. She started making plans right there at breakfast, which made for a nice change from the somber attitude of the week, or the forced lighter conversations.

During his open time on Friday morning, Edward phoned his mom and let her know that the birthday party for Jasper was back on, if she and Alice could throw something together for Saturday. He may also have suggested that his mom invite Jasper and Bella to stay over on Friday night, as well. He cancelled the hotel reservation for the weekend, though it saddened him slightly to have to let go of the waterfront hotel. But he knew Jasper was right; Bella's long term mental health was far more important than their getting away for the weekend. So after his run to the grocery store, and his hour of therapy with Jane, Edward made reservations for them at the same hotel he'd booked for Valentine's Day for Saturday night, wanting to give them a chance to be together once again, even if nothing beyond sleep happened.

Edward wasn't sure that anything during the weekend would go as any of the three of them had originally planned; despite the somewhat cathartic experience of Thursday evening, Edward didn't think that Bella was going to be in any mood to be particularly romantic. Jasper, at least, seemed to be moving past his guilt, and Edward was grateful that his partner had found Dr. Jones, who seemed to be a big help.

Whatever happened over the weekend, Edward knew they'd come out stronger on the other side. Their healing had already started. He just needed to make sure that they stayed on that path.

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there are a bunch of links to youtube videos on the blog (reallifebandgeek . blogspot . com) for some music I had in my head for Jasper to play.

**Important!** There **will not** be a post next Thursday. I will be out of town for a job interview, and though I fully expect to have internet access, I need to focus on RL for a bit. You readers are awesome, and I know you'll all be understanding, right?


	49. Chapter 48: Happy Birthday, Jasper

**Thank you to Naelany and wishingforlove as always for their fantastic beta support. Naelany especially this chapter for helping me out with something that turned out to be a first for both of us. **

**And to you, my readers. Thank you for your patience in waiting an extra week for this chapter while I handled some real life things. **

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When he checked his email over lunch on Friday, Jasper was only partially surprised to find an email from Esme inviting them to dinner at the house Friday evening and to stay the night, if they wished. She was such a care-taker that he had half-way expected the invitation much earlier in the week, but he was thankful she'd given them the space they needed to handle things on their own.

The previous night had been emotionally and physically draining; Jasper was glad that Bella hadn't seen him without a shirt before they'd settled down for bed. The angry red marks that her hands had left on his chest and belly had faded over night, and he hoped they wouldn't blossom into full fledged bruises. He didn't think he'd be able to hide them for long. But in a way, he was somewhat relieved to wear them. Bella hadn't meant to hurt him, and it had given her an outlet for the emotions she had been trying to bury and deal with on her own. Jasper knew they needed to talk some more, though. He didn't think that Bella would continue to express herself physically like that, but he didn't want her to hurt someone by getting used to it, and he hoped that she talked to her therapist about it.

Jasper accepted Esme's invitation for himself and Bella, knowing she didn't have any plans and would more than likely appreciate the time to spend with Esme, and for them to be able to snuggle up together for the night. He knew that he really looked forward to the chance for them to be close, not necessarily intimate, for the first real time in a week.

Though Bella had seemed better at breakfast, and ate significantly more at lunch than she had the rest of the week, Jasper still kept a careful half-eye on her throughout the day. She was still sad and a bit distant through her prep period, but there seemed to be less heaviness about her in general. He knew he couldn't expect her to heal overnight, but at least it was clear that the evening had caused some change.

At the end of classes for the day, Jasper shoved his papers and laptop into his messenger bag and not so patiently waited for Bella to do the same. He walked her to her room so she could pack a bag and left her there after a lingering kiss, and jogged back to his room to pack as well. On his way, the phone in his pocked buzzed, and he smiled when he found the message from Edward, asking him to pack for two nights/days, and to leave with Bella and he'd meet them at his parents' house. Jasper was puzzled, but when he pulled the duffel bag out, he complied with his partner's wishes and packed enough clothes for the whole weekend.

Jasper changed into jeans and a t-shirt and traded his loafers for his trainers before he went to retrieve Bella.

"Hey, sweetheart. Ready to go?" he asked after he knocked lightly on her open door. She was just zipping up her overnight bag.

"Just about," she answered with a small smile. She'd also changed, into loose black pants and a comfortable looking sweater, and she hadn't put shoes on over her thick socks yet. Bella sat on the edge of her bed and tugged on her fuzzy lined boots and stood. "Okay. Now I'm ready."

Jasper laughed softly. He kissed her again and lifted one of her bags from the bed, allowing her to grab her purse and a smaller bag. Bella kissed him back. "Let me just let Alice know I'm leaving," she said, ducking through the adjoining door. She returned a moment later, and Jasper led her out the door, pausing while she locked up.

Bella drove the short distance to Carlisle and Esme's, and they rode in a comfortable quiet, Jasper's hand resting lightly on her thigh. He knew they were both still tired from the week of little sleep and high emotions, and he appreciated the quiet moment, and that both of his significant others recognized his need for peace.

"Are you okay?" Bella asked softly as she pulled up in front of the house, leaving the driveway open for Esme and Carlisle when they got home. "You've been very quiet today, not that I blame you," she said, shifting her car into park and shutting off the engine. She bit her lip then turned toward him in her seat. "You're not mad at me for last night, are you?"

"No, of course I'm not mad," Jasper said. "I did goad you into it, after all," he explained softly with a half-smile. "I'm just tired."

She nodded. "I know." With a sad smile, she skimmed her fingers across his cheek, and he automatically leaned in to follow her fingers as she drew her hand away and she laughed quietly as she kissed him. "It's been a rough semester so far," she commented, running the pad of her thumb over his cheek again. "You're probably not used to all this drama."

Jasper smiled and turned his head enough to kiss the inside of her wrist. "No, my life was fairly drama free for several years, but you know, I'm pretty sure that I wouldn't trade what I have now for that quiet life," he said honestly.

Bella smiled brightly. "I'm glad."

He kissed her again lightly. "We should go in, so we don't get caught making out like teenagers in the car by the parental figures and have to explain ourselves."

Bella's smiled remained. "Can we make out later?" she asked hopefully.

Jasper laughed, happy to see some of that spark back in her personality. "I suppose," he teased.

She smacked him on the chest with the back of her hand and he tugged on a loose tendril of her hair before they unbuckled and slid out of the car. Jasper again shouldered both of their bigger bags and his own messenger bag, and Bella let them into the house with a key on her ring.

The house was dark and quiet, and Jasper carried their bags up to Edward's room while Bella flipped on lights and went into the kitchen. When he came back downstairs he found her pulling ingredients from the pantry and fridge. Jasper settled on a barstool to watch. "What are you up to, darlin'?"

"Making dessert," she answered, stretching up on her tiptoes to reach something on a high shelf. Before Jasper could move to get it for her, she succeeded in knocking it forward with her fingertips.

"Hm," he acknowledged. "And what are we having?"

"Ice cream sandwiches. I told Esme I'd make the cookies, and she's supposed to be picking up ice cream on her way home," Bella explained.

It was nice to see her in the kitchen and looking happier after the week they'd had, Jasper thought, though she still looked worn and slightly haunted. She was making an attempt to move forward, though, and that was an improvement over the way she'd appeared to have given up the previous few days. "What are you making?"

"Chocolate chip and peanut butter," Bella answered. "I have a feeling that most of them will get sent home with Emmett tomorrow, though," she said, as she started measuring flour.

"Can I help?" Jasper offered.

"Nope."

"Oh-kay."

Bella laughed softly and continued to measure ingredients as the scent of fresh coffee began to fill the room. She passed Jasper a cup after the pot finished brewing, and over the sound of the mixer he heard the front door open.

"Kids?"

"In here," Jasper called back. He slid from the stool to take the grocery bags Esme carried in, accepting the kiss on the cheek. "Well, hello, you two. Is Edward with you?" she asked, unwrapping her scarf from her neck.

"No, he said he had a couple of things to wrap up and he'd meet us here," Jasper explained, setting the bags on the bar. He began unloading and sorting the items as Esme draped her coat and scarf on a stool and rounded the counter to give Bella a hug.

"Okay," Esme answered, wrapping her arms around Bella's shoulder. "How are you, sweetheart?" she asked Bella.

Jasper only half listened to their conversation as he tucked the ice cream into the freezer and folded up the paper bags to add to the stash under the sink.

"Is there anything I can help with?" Jasper asked.

"Oh, I think we'll be fine," Esme said dismissively.

"Well, I know when I'm not wanted," he teased. He kissed the top of Bella's head and grabbed his coffee from the bar before wandering into the living room. He stretched out on the couch with the remote and started idly flipping through the channels.

Carlisle arrived a few minutes later and greeted Jasper with a quick 'hello' and a nod before heading for his room down the hall. Jasper continued to flip through the channels, finally settling on the evening news. He could hear the ladies chatting in the kitchen over the television, and Jasper just settled back into the cushions and enjoyed the quiet family atmosphere. One of the only things he regretted about his nomadic lifestyle was the lack of a solid home to return to at the end of the day; there'd been a point in his life when he wasn't sure he'd ever find anything like that again.

Jasper turned his head toward footsteps behind him, but only saw the top of Carlisle's head moving toward the kitchen. He heard Carlisle's voice mix with Esme and Bella's in the kitchen, and then he was back in the living room, extending an opened bottle of beer to Jasper, who sat up and nodded his thanks as he took it.

"How've things been this week, Jasper?" Carlisle asked as he sat at the other end of the couch.

"Rough," Jasper answered honestly after a swig from his beer. "But we made it through."

"And Bella?"

Jasper sighed softly. "She'll be okay. Last night was – bad," he said, hesitating while he chose the right word. "But today seemed better, and we decided to stay here this weekend so she could make her appointment tomorrow morning. It's going to take some time, but we'll be okay."

"Emmett called me last night and said something had happened, but he didn't give me any details. Since no one called, I'm guessing that everything went alright?"

Jasper nodded. "We talked, and she was able to get to sleep without needing to take anything. I'm sorry, I should have thought to call or text you to let you and Esme know everything was alright."

Carlisle waved his hand in dismissal as he took a drink. "It's alright. We assumed everything was fine when no one called back. Is there anything I need to know?" he asked gently.

Jasper understood where Carlisle was coming from; he wasn't only Bella's primary care physician, but also the father figure in her life, and he cared very deeply about her. "She pulled away from us," he explained quietly. "She doesn't like to be a burden, y'know."

Carlisle chuckled dryly. "Yeah. I'm aware."

Jasper tipped his bottle in Carlisle's direction. "Anyway – she shut down, basically. Went to classes, soldiered on, but she wasn't talking or eating much, and she refused to let either Edward or I get her anything to help her sleep. I couldn't take it any longer and egged her on. She exploded, which wasn't exactly what I was after, but it worked." He took a drink. "She didn't hurt me, but she feels guilty for hitting me. I could have stopped her, but it was what she needed. Bella's hurt and angry, and she felt like she couldn't do anything about it because she didn't want it to become our problem."

Carlisle nodded. "It sounds like you handled everything okay."

Jasper shrugged one shoulder. "Dunno about that, but at least she's talking to us again."

"Like you said, son, it'll take some time," Carlisle commented. "Just keeping being there for her. Speaking of, what is this 'we decided to stay home' about?" he asked with a raised eyebrow.

Shit. "Oh, uhm. Bella was going to come with us to Seattle," Jasper answered honestly, hoping Carlisle couldn't press too much further.

"So why aren't you and Edward going without her?"

Fuck. He had really hoped to talk to Edward and Bella about things before they outed themselves to the rest of the family. "We-uh-the three of us-"

"Carlisle, leave the boy alone," Esme scolded from the doorway to the kitchen. She winked at Jasper and he grinned at her. "Need anything you two? Bella and I are going to get dinner started."

"Yes, dear, and no, dear," Carlisle answered. When she turned back into the kitchen with a laugh, Carlisle turned his attention back to Jasper. "I know that you care very much about my son and Bella. If there's something going on between the three of you, that's mostly your business, but tread lightly, Jasper," he said with a note of seriousness in his voice. "You all have careers to consider, and in your profession, your lifestyle is one that could very easily come under scrutiny. I don't want to see any of you get hurt."

Jasper internally sighed in relief. "I understand."

Carlisle nodded. "Good. Want another?"

"Sure."

They both turned toward the door when it opened and Edward slipped through, a duffel bag in hand and a backpack strapped on. "Hello, son. Beer?" Carlisle greeted.

"Hi, dad. Sure. Hey, baby," he greeted Jasper. Carlisle rose with their empty bottles and strode into the kitchen. "How was your afternoon?" Edward asked, dropping his bags just inside the door and crossing the room to flop onto the couch near Jasper.

"It was a Friday afternoon," Jasper said. "Antsy students and an over-tired antsy professor made for less productivity than I would have liked."

"Aw," Edward said, leaning in to kiss him softly. "Hopefully this weekend will rectify the tiredness, at least."

"I hope so," Jasper confided quietly, returning the kiss as Carlisle returned with three beers in hand, and, when he turned to take the armchair, a handprint on the ass of his dark jeans. He nudged Edward and they both snickered.

"Getting in mom's way again?" Edward asked through his laugh.

"Hm? Oh, hell," Carlisle grumbled after looking over his shoulder. He tried brushing the handprint away, but just smeared it, much to Jasper and Edward's amusement.

"Language!" Esme's laughing voice carried from the kitchen mixed with Bella's laughter.

Carlisle rolled his eyes as he settled into the chair. "Yes, dear!"

Jasper and Edward snickered some more, but settled down after a moment into a companionable silence to watch the news. Jasper was relieved that coverage of the incident at the school seemed to have stopped and that they hadn't been pressured to speak to anyone.

Bella emerged from the kitchen after awhile and joined Edward and Jasper on the couch. Jasper caught the look that Carlisle and Esme shared, but didn't comment, as Bella snuggled down between them. They all chatted quietly, Esme taking the other chair as they watched the news before flipping over to Jeopardy. They argued over the answers and made fun of the contestants until Esme called them to the table for dinner.

Bella and Edward sat across from Jasper, and Carlisle and Esme took their regular seats at the ends of the table.

Esme served a brightly flavored roasted cut of beef, with roasted vegetables and mashed potatoes. It was comfort food pure and simple, and the conversation over dinner remained lighthearted as they all caught up. Edward and Jasper cleared the dishes after the meal and jostled playfully at the sink as they did the washing up, while Carlisle and Esme picked out a movie.

They mostly behaved in the dimly lit room, tucked up together on the couch while Carlisle and Esme cuddled in one of the chairs. Jasper's hands wandered a bit; however, he tried to keep it discreet. When the movie was over, Carlisle and Esme excused themselves to their room despite the early hour. He watched Edward smirk, and he couldn't help but remember the conversation he'd had with Emmett a few weeks previous and laughed softly.

"What?" Bella asked.

"Just remembering a talk I had with Emmett about Carlisle and Esme," he said softly. "Apparently, parents aren't supposed to have sex."

Bella laughed brightly and Edward snorted, rolling his eyes. "How does he think he got here?" Bella asked.

"That's what I asked him," Jasper retorted. They all had a good laugh at Emmett's expense before they decided that they'd abandon the downstairs for the privacy that Edward's room would provide them.

Upstairs, Edward locked the door behind them, and Bella slid up to Jasper. "I believe you made me a promise earlier."

"What promise was that?" Edward asked, coming up behind her, both of them facing Jasper.

"He said he'd make out with me," Bella chirped, smiling as she glanced over her shoulder at Edward.

"Oh yeah?" Edward asked, resting his hands on Bella's hips.

"Mmhm," she agreed, hooking her fingers into the belt loops on Jasper's jeans.

Jasper ducked his head and caught Bella's lips in a lingering kiss, his arms reaching around her to rest on Edward's hips. He had no idea really how the three of them were going to manage intimacy, logistically, but he kind of just shut off that part of his brain and let his body take over. After the initial contact, he ceded control to Bella and followed her lead.

He parted his lips when her tongue ran along the seam of them, and shivered when a second set of lips pressed to his pulse point. Jasper broke the kiss with Bella and turned to Edward, behind him slightly, and kissed him as well. "Make this about her," he whispered softly into Edward's ear, nipping at the lobe gently.

Edward smiled and nodded his understanding, kissing Jasper firmly once more then tugging Bella toward him, causing Jasper to stumble slightly, Bella's fingers still twined in his belt loops. Bella giggled as she turned to Edward, her skin flushed and her eyes bright. Edward kissed her, and Jasper moved behind her, sweeping her hair off her neck as he started leaving feather light kisses along the column of her spine, then down over the exposed skin of her shoulders.

As Bella started to relax, Jasper's fingers slid under the hem of her sweater and he lifted it as his hands reached for the flesh underneath. He rested one palm flat against the taught skin of her lower belly, lightly pressing her back against his chest as continued to nuzzle at the juncture of her neck and shoulder. Bella's quiet whimper of pleasure made him smile as his lips travelled up to her ear slowly and Edward mirrored his actions on the other side.

Jasper watched Bella's skin turn pink and a small amount of perspiration burst from her skin as Jasper's fingers slowly worked their way higher, leaving a trail of gooseflesh in their wake. Her sweater rose by inches until Jasper finally nudged Edward gently and they both pulled back momentarily so he could slip it over her head, leaving her in only her simple purple bra and jeans.

He could see her fight not to cover herself, so rather than give Bella too much time to get self conscious, Jasper kissed her again deeply, taking over the dominant role for the moment. His hands slid up the bare skin along her spine, stopping when he hit the bottom of the fastener on her bra.

"You tell us when to stop, Bella," Edward said lowly, and Jasper felt the familiar touch of Edward's hands along his, and Bella made a happy sounding noise as Edward's fingers began to move against Jasper's. Jasper broke the kiss and peeked over Bella's shoulder to see Edward slowly unhooking the catches. Edward looked up and smiled, turning his chin up for a kiss, and Jasper felt Bella's lips at his throat as he complied with Edward's unvoiced want.

"Don't stop," she said softly, her voice slightly lower. "Please don't stop."

Edward slid his hands up Bella's back and shoulders and gently guided the straps down off her shoulders, leading them down to her elbows, where the cups finally shifted, revealing the pale flesh of her breasts, the pink skin around her peaked nipples tight and rippled. Jasper skimmed his hands from her hips up her flanks to her chest, cupping a breast in each hand, Bella's breathy gasp at the run of the pad of his thumb over her erect nipples going straight to his cock.

"See?" Edward asked, suddenly behind Jasper. "You're a natural." He kissed the skin behind Jasper's ear and Jasper burst out laughing at the absurdity of the statement.

"You're an ass," he laughed, turning his head to capture Edward's lips in a deep kiss.

"Good thing you're an ass man, then," Edward said with a smirk, and Bella giggled, which ended on a breathy whimper as Jasper shifted his hands and brushed against her again. "Though I guess I should be worried that you're a boob man, too."

"Nothing to worry about at all," Bella said with a giggle as she tiptoed up and kissed Jasper again. "Unless you're not going to share?" she asked Edward.

"I'm not sure it's me you're going to have to worry about," Edward said dryly, leaning in for a kiss of his own.

Jasper felt her tug at his shirt and he got the hint, kissing her again swiftly before tugging his shirt over his head while she turned to Edward. He watched them together for a moment, again thinking about how easily they all fit together and how it just felt natural. Although Jasper intellectually understood the mechanics of having sexual intercourse with a woman, part of him was still anxious about actually performing. The previous few minutes, or more precisely, Bella's reactions, had already put a large part of him at ease.

As Edward took a small step back, Jasper grabbed Bella from behind and tugged her close, her bare back against his bare chest and he stepped toward the bed, laughing at her startled squeal of laughter. Edward joined in as he stripped out of his shirts, leaving their tops in a messy pile near the door before he limped over to join them just as Jasper reached the bed.

Jasper flopped back onto the mattress, tugging Bella down with him. He hooked his legs around hers to keep her from flailing too much, and drew her earlobe into his mouth as his fingers went to work on her jeans. They unbuttoned easily, and she complied by lifting her hips so he could slide them down, and he hooked his fingers in the elastic band of her panties at the same time, stripping her nude before she could protest. Edward stood between their intertwined legs and kissed her, threading his fingers into her hair, much like Jasper had distracted her with a kiss earlier.

Edward took the opportunity to strip out of his trousers as well, and Bella slid from Jasper's embrace so he could likewise remove his jeans. Both he and Edward remained in their underwear as they piled onto the bed, exchanging kisses and lingering touches, exploring most of each other's bodies for the first time.

Bella wound up reclined against Jasper's chest, her hair fanned out around her. Her entire body was flushed pink and glistening with perspiration in the low light of the room. Jasper had a feeling she'd be embarrassed about her position if she was able to think past the veil of lust that was currently clouding her vision. He knew she had to feel his erection against her back, and Edward's was unmistakable where he knelt between Jasper and Bella's twined legs.

"You're so fucking gorgeous, Bella," Edward breathed, a hint of a smirk on his face as he leaned in to kiss her tenderly, Jasper feeling the brush of Edward's fingers against his leg as Edward moved his hand away.

Bella tensed in Jasper's arms for just a moment before making a quiet noise low in her throat and pressing her legs against Jasper's, forcing them wider and her left leg slid against Jasper's as she bent her knee and planted her foot flat on the bed.

"Baby, I need your hand," Edward said, shifting up slightly which caused Bella to shift again and make that soft sound that Jasper was beginning to understand meant she was pleased with something. Edward kissed Jasper, and he untangled his left hand from Bella's hair, leaving his right low on her belly, making random patterns. He could feel her muscles working under his hands, and Edward took Jasper by the wrist.

Jasper let Edward guide him, though by the time his fingers brushed against warm, softer, and slightly damp skin, he had a pretty good idea what Edward's plan was, and Jasper was able to function on instinct. She wasn't shaved, he could tell, much to Jasper's relief; the prepubescent look his Corps comrades had gotten off on had creeped Jasper out in many ways. His right hand slid up Bella's flushed body, slowly learning what places made her squirm, what made her hum, and what made her giggle and smack at him. His left hand worked with Edward's as he followed his partner's lead and slowly pressed a finger into the damp warmth of Bella, feeling Edward's slightly calloused finger alongside as Bella gasped and her head fell back against Jasper's shoulder, her hips lifting slightly. Jasper pressed his lips to the side of her neck and murmured into her ear how beautiful she was as Edward's hand shifted once more and Jasper felt his fingers work differently. Jasper continued the slow motion of his finger, slowly adding more of another as Bella started to move a bit more demandingly, lifting her hips or shifting to one side.

Bella kissed the corner of Jasper's mouth somewhat roughly as his palm brushed against one of her nipples, and he repeated it when she made that soft noise. She was breathing heavily, and Jasper could feel her tighten around his fingers, the sight and smell of her fueling his own arousal which was becoming distracting as he fought the desire to palm himself through his shorts, focusing instead on Bella and Edward.

Bella stiffened in his arms just as her internal muscles clamped down on his fingers, and for just a moment, her breathing stopped before she sighed and went limp, slumping down with a contented look on her face, the flush of her body beginning to fade only slightly.

Edward also looked completely pleased with himself as he shifted, kissing Bella softly first, then Jasper. Jasper slid his hand from between Bella's parted thighs and pressed his palm to the obvious need in Edward's boxer briefs, his own cock throbbing at Edward's needy whimper at the touch.

"Looks and feels like you boys have a problem," Bella observed softly, a smile in her voice.

"All your fault," Jasper accused, teasing as he kissed her gently.

She rocked back against him and he groaned. Edward laughed softly and shifted up onto his knees, leaning forward to kiss Jasper before whispering into his ear. "Wanna give me a hand?"

"Only if you give me one," Jasper shot back. "Though I'm not gonna last long," he said just as softly.

Edward's answering grin told Jasper that he was in the same situation. Jasper moved, shifting Bella off his lap and to one side, though she remained in close physical contact with them both, her legs still tangled with Jasper's, her hands beginning to lazily wander over both their bodies.

Jasper felt a low rumble of pleasure in his chest as Edward reached for him, sticking a hand down Jasper's boxer shorts. His cock twitched as Edward's hand wrapped around the base, and again as he gathered the liquid seeping from the tip with his palm and twisted his hand slightly on the way back down. "Bella, there should be lube…" Edward asked, nodding toward the small recess in the wall created by the mattress being narrower than the bed frame.

She found it and handed it over to Jasper, who quickly slicked his own hand before handing it to Edward, and in the pause of Edward's movement, carefully, but rapidly pulled down the waistband of Edward's shorts, leaving them around his thighs as he echoed Edward's actions from a moment earlier.

Jasper held out longer than he thought he would. Edward came first, and Bella looked like she could have gone again as she watched, and it was only when she shuddered and stilled again just after Jasper came down did Jasper notice her own hand had been moving between her legs.

Edward made a face and awkwardly shimmied out of his underwear, using them to wipe up the mess on his chest and belly before he threw them onto the floor.

"That's gross," Bella said, wrinkling her nose.

Edward just shrugged and shifted to lie down behind her, spooning up against her back, and she sighed and snuggled back. Jasper laughed quietly and kissed them both before slipping from the bed. He stripped out of his boxers and picked Edward's up from the floor with a roll of his eyes and tossed them both in the hamper on his way to the bathroom. He cleaned himself up slightly, then grabbed a warm damp rag and a towel and made his way back to the bed.

They snuggled up together, finding it still a tight fit, even in Edward's full-sized bed, and there was a lot of jockeying for position, though Bella ended up in the middle, which was Jasper's plan. It wasn't that late when they finally settled down, but Jasper was exhausted, mentally and physically from the rough week, and he slipped into sleep with the quiet sounds of Edward and Bella's voices washing over him.

Jasper woke once in the night to the sound of soft crying. He shifted onto his side and wrapped his arms around Bella, nuzzling the top of her head in silent reassurance as he drifted back to sleep.

When he woke the next morning, he was surprised to find himself alone in the bed. A glance at the clock proved it was just after nine, which he would have thought would've been too early for Bella, and he knew Edward liked to lounge in bed when he had the chance. Still, he stretched out for a few minutes, letting his eyes slip closed as he listened to the quiet noises of what family was in the house.

Jasper found himself waking up again some time later when the bed shifted. He hadn't meant to fall back to sleep, but apparently his body needed the additional rest.

"Hey, baby," Edward's soft voice greeted him, and soft lips skimmed against the rough stubble on his jaw. "You 'wake?"

"I am _now_," Jasper teased. "Where'd you guys go this morning?" he asked as he blinked his eyes open, smiling softly at a smug looking Edward perched on the edge of the bed.

"Bella and I had to go run a few errands," Edward explained. "And we had presents to wrap."

"Tell me you didn't drag her out of bed just so she could help you buy wrapping paper," Jasper said with a little sigh.

"Okay," Edward said cheerfully.

Jasper groaned.

Edward laughed softly and leaned in to kiss Jasper again. "She woke me up, actually, and I took her to therapy this morning before we ran our errands. Come on," he said, nodding towards the empty room. "Put some clothes on and come downstairs. Mom wants to know what you want for dinner tonight since it's your birthday, and she's about got brunch ready."

"What do _you_ want for dinner?" Jasper asked as he slid from the bed and crossed the room. He rolled his eyes at the wolf whistle Edward let slip when Jasper bent over to pick his bag up from the floor. "Or even better, what would Bella want for dinner?"

"Nu-uh," Edward said with a shake of his head. "You don't get to pass this off on us. It's your birthday."

Jasper sighed as he slipped into a pair of boxers and a loose pair of jeans. "You know all this doesn't matter to me, right? All I really want to do is just spend time with you and Bella, and a little bit with the rest of the family."

"I know," Edward said from behind him. "But it makes them happy to do it."

"Yeah," Jasper echoed as he tugged on a t-shirt. "Alright, I'll think of something."

"Think fast, 'cause I think mom's going to pounce on you the minute you make an appearance so she and Bella can go shopping."

Edward wasn't wrong. When they stepped into the kitchen, Esme was on him with a "Happy Birthday!" and a hug, and a demand to know what he'd like for dinner. He tried to tell her that it didn't matter, that anything home cooked was alright with him, but both Esme and Bella demanded to know what one thing he'd really like to eat, so he caved, and gave Bella the address of a blog he'd come across recently and told her to surprise him. Bella kissed his cheek and tripped her way upstairs for her laptop so she and Esme could look over recipes.

Esme had remembered how much Jasper had enjoyed her breakfast pizza idea from the holidays and had prepared one for them for brunch, and served it with a fruit salad, coffee, and a side of sweet rolls for Carlisle and Edward (and for Emmett to snack on later, Jasper was sure).

After brunch, Esme and Bella poured over the blog while they made their list before heading out to the grocery store to get the supplies they needed. Carlisle took off as well, citing an errand, leaving Edward and Jasper alone. After they showered (together, of course, for conservation purposes), they ended up back on the couch with coffee, and soaking up morning cartoons. It wasn't long before the others arrived.

Bella and Esme returned and after getting things started they gathered in the living room to play games while the television played in the background. Bella ran upstairs to shower after greeting everyone and helping Esme set out some snacks. Throughout the afternoon, Esme and Bella drifted in and out as they worked on dinner or other preparations. Bella pretty much wiped everyone out at Scrabble, and Alice defeated everyone soundly in Monopoly, which took them right up to dinner. Emmett disappeared once to help Carlisle with something, and just before dinner, Alice and Bella vanished up the stairs so Bella could change out of the yoga pants and t-shirt she'd been lounging and cooking in.

Bella emerged a bit later with her hair softly curled around her face, in a fitted black dress that tied on one side and modest black heels on her feet. She looked lovely, and Jasper told her so. When he kissed her cheek, he caught a small glimpse of something pale blue in the v-cut of the neckline.

After the dinner dishes had been cleared, everyone gathered in the living room and presented Jasper with a small pile of gifts and cards. He sat on the couch, with Bella and Edward on either side as he went through the parcels. He was grateful to find they were smaller than he'd expected; Christmas gifts to Jasper were one thing, birthdays were something else. Even as a child he'd not really celebrated his birthday much. He'd always been more content to spend the day with his family, going out to a movie and dinner rather than having a huge party where his friends felt obligated to get him gifts (and part of that may have been avoiding getting invitations to all their parties in exchange). But since he knew the gesture made his new family happy, he sat back and let Bella pass him things to open.

First off was an envelope with his name on it, in Emmett's handwriting. Inside the card was a torn off piece of notebook paper that said "Redeem for one boys' day out. Your choice."

Jasper laughed. "Thanks, Em."

Emmett grinned and nodded.

He was handed a flat parcel wrapped in brightly colored paper, and he recognized Alice's handwriting on the tag. Jasper slipped his fingers under the flaps of paper and slit the tape, letting the paper fall to the ground. He turned the picture frame over and was rewarded with a sketch of the photo Alice had taken of the three of them the Saturday before when they'd huddled together on the couch in the wake of the shooting at the school. Though he didn't really like the reminder of the event, they looked truly peaceful in the image, cuddled together as they had shared the strength they'd had left.

Inside a card from Rosalie he found a coupon for a free tune-up on his car, along with a $50 iTunes gift card.

From Carlisle and Esme he'd received a copy of the house key, and Esme had ordered him his own bureau for Edward's room, which Carlisle had picked up on his errand that afternoon and snuck into the garage.

Bella had purchased a top of the line, single cup coffee maker to keep in the office, and she teased him that it was as much for her as him, because it made tea and cocoa too, so they could stop worrying about leaving the kettle on, as well as a small plant for the window in their office.

Edward had wrapped up three long-sleeved running shirts and a set of Pirate Legos together in a smallish box attached to a larger package that was wrapped in coordinating paper. Jasper assumed that Bella or Alice had something to do with that.

"Legos?" Jasper asked, a smile tugging at his lips.

Edward shrugged. "You've been saying how you wish you had a hobby," he teased.

Jasper laughed softly and kissed Edward quickly. "Thank you." Inside the larger box he found a new gig bag for his guitar, which would allow him to throw out the hard sided case that he was surprised was still in one piece for all the wear and tear it'd seen. He thanked Edward again; the gift was both thoughtful and useful, which Jasper appreciated. All the gifts he'd received would be put to good use, and he loved the family a little more for their understanding of him.

Esme had made a peach and berry cobbler for dessert, and once that, and the coffee had been finished, Edward made their excuses and Jasper found himself being dragged to the car.

Jasper stopped abruptly as Edward came to a halt and pulled something from his pocket; a black scarf was wrapped around his fingers. "Edward-" Jasper warned as his partner smiled and fastened the blindfold across his eyes, turning Jasper gently from his shoulders so he could knot it.

The hand that enveloped Jasper's had to be Bella's because it was smaller and the skin smoother than Edward's.

"Wait, where are we going?" Jasper asked as Bella tugged him to the car and he was guided into the backseat.

"It's a surprise," Edward responded while Bella snuggled up to Jasper's side in the back.

"Guys," Jasper tried to protest, but soft lips against his cut him off.

"Just go with it, Jazzy, please?" Bella asked quietly.

He nodded and felt her fingertip trace his soft smile before she kissed him again. "Thank you."

The drive wasn't very long, and when the car stopped, Jasper had no idea where they were. Bella helped him from the car, and he felt her and Edward on either side of him, Bella's arm around his elbow, and Edward's right hand in his left, after he heard the trunk close. She tugged lightly on his elbow to guide him. They ended up in an elevator, which had Jasper still thinking of where they could possibly be. He followed Bella and Edward's lead, trying to place the slightly anti-septic scent in the air as they paused. He heard a 'schnick' and a click, and then the sound of a doorknob.

"Stay right here, okay?" Edward said softly before letting go of his hand. Bella squeezed his forearm before her hand disappeared, and Jasper was left standing alone, in the dark.

He heard the rustle of clothing and frowned despite the thrill of anticipation that sparked through him.

"We're not in public, baby," Edward soothed him. Jasper felt Edward's hand at the base of his skull and slowly skim down his spine over his clothes. "Relax. You said you just wanted quiet time with us," he continued lowly in Jasper's ear as he pressed his chest against Jasper's back. Jasper felt Edward's fingers at the waistband of his jeans, and he shifted back into Edward as Edward's fingers slipped between Jasper's skin and the rough fabric of his jeans. "But we've got privacy, so I can't guarantee how quiet that'll really turn out to be," he teased. Edward's hand moved back up and Jasper felt his fingers at the back of his head. The knot was loosened and the scarf slowly slid away from Jasper's eyes.

The lights were low, but it still took a moment for Jasper's eyes to adjust. They were in a hotel room that seemed more familiar than a generic room should, but that was in the background of what he truly noticed first. Edward's fingers continued to lightly brush against the skin under the waistband of Jasper's boxer briefs as he took in the image of Bella before him.

Bella had shed her dress, revealing a powder blue little top that only barely brushed the top of her thighs. It was semi-shear, so Jasper could see the line of the small panties underneath, but she was mostly covered, which he knew made her more comfortable. Her breasts were covered by a lacy material, and despite the smile, Jasper could tell she was slightly anxious. Her hair was coiled up on top of head in a messy pile held in place with a pair of pale colored chopsticks.

Jasper's anxiety fell away as she blushed softly under his gaze. "Bella," he sighed softly, smiling.

"Happy Birthday," she said quietly, crossing the room in her bare feet. She rose up on her tiptoes once she'd stopped in front of him and kissed Jasper. He bent to meet her, his left hand going to her lower back to support her as the kiss deepened and she wobbled a bit on her toes.

Jasper felt Edward's lips at his ear. "Happy Birthday," Edward echoed. "I love you."

Jasper turned to kiss Edward over his shoulder. "I love you, too. And you," he said turning back to Bella, kissing her forehead as she smiled up at him from her flat feet. "You are stunning," he said softly. "You didn't have to do this for me," he said, slipping his fingers under her little dress, running them over the soft skin just above the swell of her ass.

"We wanted to," Edward responded, his fingers still against Jasper's skin. "And it's as much for us as you. We don't get much time together."

"And," Bella said, her hands going to Jasper's chest, smiling up at him. "This is what you wanted, right?"

Jasper smiled. "Yeah, though I'd sound like a cad if I admitted that this is _exactly_ what I wanted."

Bella giggled, and Edward's low laugh rumbled against Jasper's back. "You're not the only one," Edward said, scraping his teeth lightly against Jasper's pulse point. Jasper tipped his head back against Edward's shoulder in response as Bella went to work beginning to unbutton his shirt from the bottom up. "Bella had some pretty good ideas about what she wanted to do this evening," Edward continued lowly. "Think you can handle letting her call the shots?" he said into Jasper's ear, his warm breath washing over the sensitive skin, making Jasper shiver.

"Yeah," Jasper answered thickly as Bella pressed light kisses against his thin undershirt. "I can do that."

Bella beamed up at him. "Good. Take this off," she ordered.

Jasper quirked an eyebrow. "Yes, ma'am," he answered, bending to kiss her again as she took a step back. He quickly shrugged out of his shirt and pulled his undershirt over his head, dropping them both to the floor. Bella had stepped away and Jasper turned to see Edward also shirtless, barefoot, in his trousers from dinner. He'd left his cane propped against the bureau and Jasper slid his hand around Edward's neck and kissed him deeply.

"Mm. I could watch that for a couple hours," Bella mused from Jasper's shoulder.

Jasper turned to face her, and she took one of his hands lightly. "I know that you've got to be anxious about intimacy with me," she said plainly. "Tonight is about you." She placed her fingers lightly on his lips when he tried to protest. "It's your birthday," Bella said with a smile. "But beyond that, I want to do this for you. For me," she continued. "Have you ever been with a woman, Jazzy?"

He shook his head, and felt Edward's lips on the back of his neck again, quietly reassuring.

She stretched up and kissed him lightly. "It's okay," she said softly, still smiling. "We know all the parts work, right?" she teased softly. "Last night showed us that. And you may know here," she said, cupping his cheek lightly and running his thumb over a cheekbone and her middle finger against the hair at his temple. "And want it here," she said, laying her palm over his heartbeat. "But I'm afraid that if we keep dancing around things that it'll remain a big white elephant in the room, and I think we've all been hurt enough in the past that we don't need that."

Bella smiled. "We can talk about it until we're blue in the face, but I think that unless we try, it's not going to matter," she said, her fingers making light circles on his chest. "I love you, and nothing's going to change that. There's so much healing we have left to do, and I know that, but this," she said, tiptoeing up to kiss him again, warm and soft and lingering, and he rested his hands on her hips, slipping under the soft fabric of her barely-there dress. "I think this could go a long way toward helping us find that place to start. I need some new good memories, Jazzy. I know this last week has sucked, to put it simply, and though this might not be the absolute best way to move forward, I'm ready. I know you love me- that you both love me," she said, looking behind Jasper slightly to Edward, who was still being quietly physically supportive. "And I need to remember what it's like to be really, truly loved," she said on a whisper, her eyes suspiciously bright.

Jasper's left hand remained curled around her hip as his right ghosted up her body to cup her cheek, mirroring her position on him. He bent his head and kissed her softly, running his thumb over her cheekbone, feeling the skin heat with her blush. When Jasper broke the kiss he took a half step back and released his grip on her hip to reach for Edward, drawing him up to join them.

"I just…" Jasper started. He took a slow deep breath. "We have to know how hard it's going to be, when we're outed, so to speak. I just want to make sure that we're all ready because I feel like there's not going to be any going back after this," he admitted quietly. "I don't have any reservations at all," he affirmed, squeezing Edward's hand and caressing Bella's cheek lightly. "I'd gladly give up everything if it meant I got to be with you both at the end of every day. But I'm not the only person involved here. I don't want to rush us into anything that we're not prepared to deal with."

"I'm ready," Bella said softly, turning her head to nuzzle into his palm.

"Jas, baby," Edward said quietly. "We know. It's okay." He kissed Jasper softly, then Bella. "We need to start to move forward. It's not going to fix everything, but our girl's right; it's time to start making some new memories. Together."

"So we're okay," Jasper clarified.

"Yeah, sweetheart, we're okay," Bella answered softly, a smile tugging at her lips. She kissed him again. It was slow and languid and sweet, and when Bella stepped away, her hand skimmed along Jasper's jaw and fell away. Edward kissed Jasper then, and released his hand, and Bella took it. "Come on," she said softly, tugging him toward the bed.

Jasper followed her lead, and Edward stepped away, lowering the lights, before he joined them. Bella stopped Jasper before he could settle on the bed, and he nodded as she silently asked permission to remove his pants. Flirty shy Bella was back as she unfastened his trousers and lowered the zipper. Without a belt, they fell from his hips, leaving him in the boxer briefs he'd slipped into after his shower that morning. She smiled up at him as she trailed her fingers up his stomach.

"You get over here, too," she said to Edward, reaching out with her other hand. "I've never done this before," she said softly. "Been part of a ménage, or whatever," she explained as she reached for the clasp on Edward's soft pants. "Someone's bound to get left out," she whispered.

"Maybe, maybe not," Edward said, kissing her softly, just below the ear. "I've done it before, and we'll, hopefully, get more chances to practice," he said with a wink.

The revelation didn't really surprise Jasper, but Bella glanced up sharply at Edward. "You have?"

"Mmhm," Edward agreed, one of his hands drifting lightly up and down her bare arm. "A long time ago."

"But-"

"Bella honey," Jasper said lightly. She turned to him. "Let it go."

Her eyes flashed for a moment, but then softened and she nodded. Her fingers went back to work on Edward's trousers. "What I meant was…"

Jasper kissed the exposed skin on the back of her neck. "We know."

"Besides," Edward added as he stepped out of his pants, revealing his lack of underpants. "It's Jasper's birthday anyway, so it makes perfect sense that he gets most of the attention," he teased before kissing Bella softly. "We'll figure it out as we go," he murmured against her lips.

"Okay." She kissed him back, then turned to Jasper.

He kissed her, sensing the moment of awkwardness that was approaching as they tried to transition from talking into physicality. "I'm in your hands tonight, darlin'," Jasper said, moving to kiss the soft skin on the underside of her jaw. "Show me what you want," he urged.

"Bed," she said softly.

Jasper nodded and complied, taking the two steps back so that he could sit. Edward stepped away again, but didn't go far, just to a small bag on the bureau that Jasper recognized. They had planned for it, so Jasper wasn't surprised at the appearance of the bag of tricks.

When he was seated on the edge of the bed, Bella straddled his lap with a soft grin and kissed him, cupping both of his cheeks in her palms. Jasper felt the bed shift and knew that Edward hand joined them. Jasper let Bella set the pace and direction, which seemed to be exploring his body a bit more in depth than the previous evening. She found what places made him squirm (sometimes with helpful hints from Edward), and slowly coaxed his body into a state of eager arousal, eventually getting him out of his underwear.

While Bella explored with her lips, tongue, and hands, Edward wasn't idle, doing much the same to her, gradually working her out of her skimpy panties and lacy dress. Jasper refused to be as selfish as they wanted him to be and occasionally took a bit more dominant role, but he was always touching one of them, even if his attention was more focused on Bella's actions rather than her reactions to Edward's. He knew there'd be plenty of time for everything, eventually.

"I want you to make love to me," Bella said lowly against Jasper's neck as she brushed over his skin with her nose. "Will you, Jazzy?"

"If that's what you want," he answered.

She smiled brightly and kissed him, her whole body flushed a pretty pink, her arousal evident in the moist heat over his thigh as she ground against him, seeking some friction.

Jasper reached for their bag, and the condoms inside. Bella stilled his hand. "I'm clean," she whispered. "And on the pill."

"So're we," Edward answered, kissing the back of her neck. "Clean, anyway," he clarified. "But let us protect you, okay? Besides," he said, winking at Jasper as he reached back into the bag. "It makes for easier clean up."

Bella laughed and nodded, and Edward kissed her deeply while Jasper tore open the packet his fingers had closed upon. "Let me?" Bella asked softly, her lips swollen from all the kissing, her hair beginning to fall from the chopsticks holding it in place.

Jasper handed her the condom and he whimpered softly as she unrolled it down him with a delicate touch that did nothing to soothe Jasper's need for friction of his own. "How…?" he asked, not getting the whole question out before she kissed him again.

"You're perfect right there," she said. He was sprawled on the bed, half propped up on pillows and shifted, straddling him again. "Me on top, I think." She kissed him again before kissing Edward, halfway behind Jasper.

It would give her the best position for control, which Jasper didn't doubt she needed, and he was more than happy to give it to her. He knew all the mechanics of the action of course, but found himself momentarily panicked about hurting her or not getting into the right spot.

"Shh," she soothed him, running her fingers down his jaw line. "You know how this works," Bella said, her voice soft but laced with desire. She wrapped her hand around Jasper's condom sheathed cock and guided him toward her as she lowered her body onto him. "Tab A," she said lowly with a grin and a wink, giving him a not-so-gentle squeeze, "goes into slot b," she said, her breath catching as she lowered herself onto Jasper. He could tell she was fighting to control herself; she was pushing at his chest, her nails lightly scraping as her fingers tightened, like she wanted something more, and quickly. "Remove," she whispered, raising up slightly onto her thighs, away from Jasper as he shifted his hips, "and repeat," she said, ending on a quiet whimper as she settled back onto him.

Jasper's hands lightly curled around her hips, helping her balance as he watched her move with and against him. She rocked forward slightly to press her lips against his, and Jasper returned the kiss, feeling nothing but love and support pour from her as she silently coached him on how to pleasure not only her, but both of them together.

"Do you know how fucking gorgeous the two of you look right now," Edward growled in Jasper's ear, nibbling on the lobe. "Touch her, baby," he guided quietly. "You're not going to hurt her," he said, scraping his teeth against Jasper's ear. "Look into her eyes." He felt Edward's arousal against his back and the brush of his slightly warmer hand slide from Jasper's side, and in his mind, Jasper could see Edward touching himself as he watched.

Jasper did, seeing the pure desire glowing in her deep brown eyes. He took the subtle cues from her body, taking when she gave, letting the anxiety go long enough to give back, feeling an odd sense of pride as she made quiet noises of pleasure. It took a moment, but they found a rhythm after Jasper shifted position slightly, giving him a bit more leverage. Edward continued to murmur in Jasper's ear, guiding his hand when Bella had started to move hers toward her sex, not wanting her to have to pleasure herself. His thumb and forefinger found the soft nub of flesh and nerves and Bella whimpermoaned when he rolled it as they moved together.

Edward's hand moved behind Jasper's back (he could feel the occasional brush of knuckles against his spine), but his other roamed over Jasper's body as he kept up a steady stream of one-sided conversation. The words grew strained as Edward's breathing grew more labored through their exertions.

Bella's fingers brushed against Jasper's as she wrapped her smaller hand around Jasper's cock as she rose up onto her thighs. She lightly skimmed her fingers back to cup and roll his balls in the palm of her hand, making him whimper quietly with need as his head fell back onto Edward's shoulder. He felt the other man's lips at his temple, then the corner of his mouth.

Jasper shifted his hand from Bella's hip momentarily, as she seemed perfectly balanced, lost in a primal rhythm. He brushed his thumb over her peaked nipples, then let his fingers skim up the column of her neck and traced her lips with his fingertips. She kissed them, and he felt her pleasured hum vibrate against the pads of his fingers as he moved the fingers against her clit.

He moved his hand back to her hip when he felt her start to tremble against him.

She breathed his name when she came, her head falling back, hair limp and damp around her face, the pink stain of exertion spreading up from her belly over her chest and face. Her release triggered his own as she tightened around him; his hands tightened on her hips and he feared he had left bruises. She slumped over on top of him and Jasper embraced her, feeling completely overwhelmed by the experience, and knowing he was loved absolutely. He kissed the top of her head repeatedly as Edward shifted out from behind Jasper, evidence of his release sticky and damp against Jasper's back, and draped himself over Bella's back, both of them pressing warm and comfortable against Jasper's chest.

"Hm," Bella hummed happily, nuzzling Jasper's chest, his thigh sandwiched between her legs.

Edward chuckled quietly and Jasper smiled as he skimmed his fingers over Edward's back, tracing the contours of the scar tissue with his fingertips. They were a messy pile of limbs, hair, sweat and other fluids, but Jasper wouldn't have traded the moment for anything. He awkwardly pulled the chopsticks from Bella's hair (they weren't doing any good) and set them on the nightstand closest to his side of the bed. Bella made another quiet noise of contentment as he began to lightly comb through her tresses with his fingers. Edward stretched an arm out along the length of Bella's shoulder and arm and twined their fingers together, their forearms resting over Jasper's belly.

They stayed cuddled together like that for awhile, until Bella and Edward shifted off of Jasper. Bella made a small noise of disappointment as she moved away, Jasper himself feeling the loss of intimate contact as his softened cock slipped out of her. He quickly disposed of the condom, tossing it toward the trash can after he'd tied a quick knot in the end, and rolled over to embrace them again.

Bella remained spooned between Jasper and Edward, though after awhile she nudged them both away so she could roll onto her back. She stretched out with a happy little sigh, pointing her toes and throwing her arms up over her head. Edward shifted slightly, resting his head on her stomach, making her giggle, but she brought one of her arms back down and started combing through his hair with her fingertips.

Jasper twined his fingers with those of Bella's free hand and she smiled over at him, lifting herself up at the shoulders and laying her head on his shoulder. He kissed the top of her head, and Bella giggled softly as Edward turned his face slightly and began pressing light kisses on the flat of her stomach.

Edward slowly turned onto his side as he continued to rain kisses and touches over Bella's body. Jasper nuzzled at the top of her head, his hands beginning to roam lightly over Bella's upper body while Edward took over a more dominant role. Edward got to his knees a bit unsteadily on the bed, but managed to keep his position as he kissed Bella tenderly on the lips.

"There's something I've wanted to do for a very long time," Edward confessed softly as he knelt between Bella's thighs, his knees even with hers. Jasper watched, his hands skimming over Bella's flat belly as Edward's hands slid up her legs, coaxing her to bend her knees. Edward slowly pressed kisses up the insides of both of her legs, and Jasper watched Bella's chest rise and fall more rapidly as he drew nearer to her sex and her anticipation grew.

Edward shifted his position, skimming his nose up the inside of Bella's thigh as he lowered himself onto his chest, laying flat against the mattress, his face level with the dark trimmed curls at the apex of Bella's thighs.

"Oh, god," Bella sighed, her head falling back against Jasper's shoulder as most of Edward's face disappeared from view. Jasper kissed her neck, lingering over the hammering pulse point. One of her hands tangled in Edward's messy hair, the other reached back over her head to Jasper's neck, her short nails lightly scraping against the base of his skull as her fingers tightened around strands of his hair, too.

Jasper could feel Bella move against him in response to what Edward was doing, her bent knees and feet flat on the mattress giving her room to lift up slightly from her hips. Jasper skimmed his hands up her body, once again damp and flushed with perspiration and cupped a breast in each hand, causing her to whimper softly as he rolled her nipples between his thumbs and forefingers and murmured in her ear. "You're so beautiful, Bella," he said, sucking the lobe into his mouth and toying with her earring with his tongue. "And I love the way you look with Edward's head between your thighs," he continued after releasing her ear. He trailed his lips down the side of her face until he could catch her lips with his own, her fingers tightening in his hair in response.

Bella was panting when she broke the kiss, her eyes fluttering closed. Jasper slid his hands down to her hips and kissed along her neck and shoulders. Bella's fingers tensed in his hair again before her fingers went slack, and he watched as her body tensed all the way down to her toes curling against the mattress and he scraped his teeth lightly along her shoulder. She was breathing heavily as she slumped against Jasper, and Edward looked up, a smug expression on his face as he rested his chin on her pelvis just above her mound.

Jasper smirked at him and kissed Bella softly. She smiled and her eyes opened, rounding out the blissful expression on her face. Jasper loosened his arms around her waist as she struggled to sit up, cupping Edward's face between her hands. She kissed him deeply, and Jasper understood that she felt she'd been given a gift, and she was thanking Edward the best way possible.

Jasper scooted off to the side while Bella folded up slightly and curled up against Edward. He found the mini fridge in the room and grabbed three bottles of water, and picked up Bella's little dress thingy on his way back to the bed. She seemed less self conscious when they were all in similar states of undress, and she'd gotten more comfortable around them, but he wanted her to have the option of covering up, if she wanted.

"Here," he said, handing them each a bottle, before he twisted the top off his and drained half of it quickly, then joined them on the bed, after tugging the badly rumpled bed linens around so they could actually get under them.

Jasper slid between the sheets and sidled up to Edward. Bella had turned onto her side and rested her head on Edward's shoulder, her leg tossed over Edward's, a hand lightly laying on his stomach. Edward took her hand and twined their fingers together as Jasper got settled, also on his back as he stretched then relaxed.

They didn't remain quiet or still for too long. Bella eventually slipped over Edward's body to half-straddle the both of them, sitting back on her heels, a knee carefully planted between each of their legs. Jasper slowly skimmed his hand up and down her thigh as she kissed and touched them both, continuing what would likely be an ongoing exploration of their bodies. Jasper laughed as she located, then took advantage of the little places on Edward's body that made him squirm or groan in pleasure. Edward took his revenge by pointing out some of those same places on Jasper's body, which necessitated another scramble of bodies as Bella needed to find the _exact_ place Edward had described near Jasper's tailbone.

"Christ, girl," Jasper swore as he felt her scrape her teeth over the spot, pleasure surging through him at the intimate attention to one of his most sensitive places. Bella's laugh washed over him, combining with Edward's deeper chuckle as Jasper fought down the need to turn over and tackle her into the mattress like he'd done to Edward so many times before, especially when her small hand crept over his hip and cupped his balls, her thumb lightly skimming the vein on the underside of his cock.

"Bella," Jasper heard himself whine warningly.

She laughed again and withdrew her hand, which Jasper wasn't sure actually helped anything. Edward popped himself up on his elbow and grinned at Jasper, stretching up a bit to catch Bella's lips over Jasper's shoulder.

"Can I watch you?" Bella asked shyly, having returned to running one of her small hands up and down Jasper's spine, lingering at the swell of his ass before sliding back up to the nape of his neck.

"You won't feel left out?" Edward responded, cupping her cheek in palm and kissing her again tenderly.

Jasper rolled onto his back and turned his head to face her.

"Hm, I think I'll be fine," she whispered with a smile, squirming slightly as Jasper kissed a dark mark on her belly. "I've been very well looked after so far tonight."

"Whatever the lady wishes," Jasper answered, blowing a raspberry against her side, causing her to laugh and pinch his ass in response.

They continued with the foreplay between the three of them until Edward pretty vocally demanded that Jasper get on with things. Bella was never far out of Jasper's line of sight as he slowly and tenderly made love to Edward, giving her a chance to decide that their lovemaking wasn't something she wanted to watch. However, that worry was fairly quickly put aside as Bella tried to maintain a physical contact between them, but mostly took it upon herself to stroke Edward's cock as Jasper took him from behind. Though she didn't climax again, she had a very satisfied look on her face when Edward did, and softly kissed them both before sliding off the bed and into the bathroom to wash her hands, and bring back towels to gently clean them up.

Jasper fell asleep, exhausted in a good way, sandwiched between his two lovers. He could feel Bella's cheek against his back, and the warmth Edward generated against his front as he drifted off.

He was awoken with soft kisses and tender touches the next morning, and he smiled without opening his eyes. "Mornin'," he said softly.

"Hi, Jazzy," Bella whispered into his ear. "You slept late."

"Did I?" he asked, still not opening his eyes. He felt the bed shift, and his hands moved to steady the weight that settled over his hips, deciding it was Bella based on the curves he encountered as his hands traveled down the bare skin. "Someone must've worn me out last night."

He heard Edward's quiet laugh before he felt Edward's hand on his bare thigh.

"That's what Edward said, too. Men are such babies," Bella sighed dramatically.

Jasper pinched her sides and finally opened his eyes when she squealed in laughter. The room was still dark, the drapes pulled closed against the windows giving Jasper little idea of what time it really was, not that it mattered. Bella was perched over him, her knees on either side of his hips, her ass perfectly positioned, providing a delicious bit of pressure for his morning wood. Apparently, she knew it, too, as she smirked and bounced slightly on her knees, causing Jasper to groan quietly in pleasure at the sensation, and the sight of her breasts moving with her.

"Torturing Jasper already this morning?" Edward asked, shifting over to sit behind Bella, his legs straight out in front of him along Jasper's sides. He pressed his chest against Bella's back, causing her to wriggle again with that same smirk and spark in her eyes.

"Yep," she answered simply. "Wanna help?" She looked over her shoulder at Edward and smiled, and Jasper knew that there was a very likely chance that neither he or Edward would ever be able to deny her anything if she smiled at them like that.

Jasper was treated to one of Edward's devilish smiles before he skimmed his nose up the length of Bella's neck and whispered in her ear, his hands flat on her stomach, his thumbs making small circles. He watched as Edward's hands coaxed a flush up Bella's naked body as he nibbled on her ear. Bella nodded, tipping her head back onto Edward's shoulder. Jasper took advantage of the moment and skimmed his palms up her sides, skipping over Edward's arms, until he could cup a breast in each hand. Her head popped up off Edward's shoulder when Jasper rolled both her nipples between his thumbs and forefingers, and the lust and want in her eyes sent Jasper's ratcheting up another notch.

"Move, Edward," Bella said, quietly but urgently.

Edward kissed her behind the ear and shifted back in an awkward motion. Bella rose up on her knees and moved so she wasn't straddling Jasper any longer, but kneeling next to him. "Up," she demanded, reaching for his hands, which had tried to follow as she'd moved away. Jasper let her pull him up into a seated position and resumed the gentle hold on her waist as she kissed him. Edward sidled up behind Jasper and kissed the back of his neck, running his hand lightly up and down Jasper's spine.

"Jasper in the middle," Bella said in a soft sing-song voice as she lowered herself down on to the bed, her ankles still tucked up underneath her. It took only a moment for her to stretch herself out and tug Jasper (and Edward) down on top of her.

"It's not my birthday anymore," he chastised gently.

"It doesn't matter," Bella said, sliding a thigh against him as Edward pressed his cheek against Jasper's back. "This is just us, Jazzy. Sometimes it'll be you. Sometimes me. Sometimes Edward. It's us."

He searched her eyes for a moment, and felt Edward's lips at his neck. "Please?" Edward whispered.

Jasper nodded and Bella smiled, leaning up to kiss him. Edward reached behind Bella for condoms and lube.

The joining was one of the most intense sexual experiences of Jasper's life. Edward took him from behind as Jasper filled Bella, and he was nearly on sensory overload the whole time. It was slow and sweet, and overwhelming, and when Jasper collapsed onto Bella after bringing her to climax twice and Edward had prolonged Jasper's as long as possible, he had tears in his eyes, from the intensity and the emotions.

Bella kissed away the few tears that had fallen when Jasper's eyes had closed, and Edward embraced him from behind, whispering soft words as they exchanged tender touches as their breathing returned to normal and their heart rates slowed.

When Jasper tried to move, Bella held him close. "We've got to be squishing you, sweetheart."

"You're fine," she breathed, running her fingers through his hair. "This is where I want to be."

Jasper felt Edward kiss the top of his head, then shift his weight so he could kiss Bella over Jasper's shoulder. They remained in their awkward pile for several minutes, until Edward finally slipped his weight off Jasper's back, taking their intimate connection with him. Jasper kissed Bella tenderly then moved as well, rolling onto his back. Bella followed somewhat, turning onto her side and tucking herself up against his chest.

"Love you," Jasper said quietly. Bella kissed his chest and echoed his words as Edward did the same. They continued to lay together, talking quietly, until Edward's phone chimed, bursting their small bubble and allowing the real world to creep back into their lives.

"Ignore it," Bella pleaded quietly.

Edward laughed softly and kissed her. "I can't, it's dad," he said, untangling himself so he could leave the bed. "Besides, we should get moving to get checked out and back to the world," he said.

"He's right," Jasper agreed, his fingers trailing against Edward's skin as he moved away, and limped naked across the room to his phone. "We should feed you," he said, poking lightly at her stomach, "and we've all got work to do."

Bella sighed. "Yeah."

Jasper turned onto his side and propped his head up on his elbow, facing her. "Hey," he said quietly, caressing her face lightly. "Just the beginning, right?" he ran his thumb lightly over her lips.

She nodded and pursed her lips, kissing the pad of this thumb. "I just…I kinda don't want to go back to the real world."

"Understandable," he said, Edward's voice in the background as he talked to Carlisle. "It's not been a place that's been too kind to us lately."

Bella smiled sadly and nodded.

"But sweetheart," Jasper continued. "Remember what you said last night about starting over?" he waited for her answering nod. "This is another chance. I know it was a bad week, and nothing's going to be exactly as it was before, but we'll work through it."

"I know," she agreed. "It's just been so easy to forget since yesterday afternoon."

Jasper smiled sadly and kissed her again. "It'll get better."

"That's what Dr. Stevens said."

"See? I know what I'm talking about," Jasper said lightly.

Bella smiled. "I know."

"Okay. So get your gorgeous ass out of bed and into the shower so we can feed you before it gets too much later," Jasper teased, kissing her lightly.

"Yes, sir," Bella answered, and squirmed her way out of his embrace and off the bed. He watched her move unselfconsciously across the room to her bag, which she carried with her into the bathroom.

"What did your dad want?" Jasper asked as Edward crossed back to the bed and perched on the edge.

"Nothing major," Edward answered. "Mom's not feeling well so they're skipping dinner tonight, and he just wanted to check in. I think he knows more than he lets on."

Jasper nodded. "We had a conversation on Friday," he agreed. "He just warned me to be careful," he relayed to Edward. "Nothing we haven't already talked about."

Edward kissed Jasper softly. "So now we have more things to talk about, hm?"

Jasper smiled. "Yeah," he agreed quietly. He kissed Edward, cupping stubble-rough cheeks between his palms. "Thank you."

"For what, baby?"

"For giving me the space to deal with this when I needed it. For letting me know it was okay to want this. For just being you," he said, echoing Bella's words from the week previous.

Edward rested his forehead against Jasper's. "I love you, and I just want you to be happy," he breathed. "You are, right?" His thumb stroked over Jasper's cheek.

"Yeah, I am," Jasper answered with a soft smile. "For the first time, in a very long time, I can honestly say that I'm happy."

Edward beamed and kissed him again as the shower shut off. "I'm glad."

They remained seated closely together until Bella emerged from the bathroom in a matching bra and panty set. While she dressed, Jasper and Edward rotated through the shower.

Once they'd cleaned up and dressed, Edward took care of checking them out of the hotel, and they made their way to the diner for breakfast. It was a lighthearted meal, and they found some way to try to stay in contact with each other while in the booth.

When they'd finished their (rather late) breakfast, Edward drove them back to his parents' house for Bella's car. Jasper rode back to campus with her, and walked her back to her building. Once she was settled back in her room, Jasper left her with a lingering kiss and headed back to his room and the waiting pile of homework and tests that needed to be graded.

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the blog that Jasper refers Esme and Bella to is homesicktexan. Thanks to Naelany for pointing me in that direction.

My interview last week went well, now I'm just waiting to hear. Thank you all for your well wishes and your understanding in letting me focus on that for the week. We're back to a regular weekly schedule again for awhile unless something else pops up. :D


	50. Chapter 49: Finding a Groove

**As always, huge thanks to Naelany and wishingforlove.**

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Bella met up with Jasper and Edward at breakfast Friday morning. Starting Sunday evening she had tried to slowly wean herself off of the need to be with one of her men in order to have a peaceful night's sleep. She'd spoken to Carlisle over the weekend and he had prescribed her a mild sedative which helped, and didn't leave her groggy the next morning. Monday night she had found herself at Jasper's door, however, despite the drugs, having woken from a violent nightmare at about two in the morning. He hadn't said anything, though, just folded her into a hug and led her to the bed, waking her several hours later when he returned from the gym with Emmett.

From there, though, it seemed that things got a little easier. Though the three of them were still cautious about being overly affectionate anywhere in the students' presence, their weekend had seemed to help solidify the bond between them, and Bella felt, for the first time in a week, that she might actually be able to move past what James had done.

The extra appointments with Dr. Stevens were helping as well. After Saturday's session, Bella's therapist had suggested they set a second regular appointment on Wednesdays for awhile. Wednesday's appointment was full of tears, but Dr. Stevens had led her work her way through everything, and that, as much as spending the weekend in private intimacy with Edward and Jasper had put a lot of things into perspective. Dr. Stevens had also mentioned the possibility of additional medication, but Bella had declined; she didn't feel that she needed anything beyond something to help her sleep.

Thursday evening, Bella spent her time with Edward while Jasper was busy with his own therapy and the history club. It was somewhat of a relief to be casually affectionate with Edward, finally, after having pushed aside her desires and feelings for so long. Just as Jasper had said, Edward was very fond of cuddling, and the evening passed quickly as she curled up with him to work on grading assignments while he did the same and played with her hair. It might not have been the best work ethic, but the work was getting done, and she got to spend time with one of her lovers.

She had gone home after leaving Edward with a sweet kiss late Thursday night, and crawled into bed, hesitating only briefly before taking one of the pills Carlisle had gotten for her. She was learning that depending on something for help, be it a bit of chemical assistance or her friends and family, wasn't necessarily a bad thing.

Friday morning she woke easily, feeling better than she had in days. Of course part of that was because it was the weekend. She showered and blew her hair dry before choosing her clothes for the day. She chose a long peasant skirt and coordinating top that Alice had convinced her she needed, which had turned out to be comfortable and cute, which suited Bella's mood. She was tempted to pull on a pair of worn leather flip flop sandals, but a quick peek out the window showed that the weather was unlikely to hold, and she didn't want to chance it. Bella quickly tossed everything into her bag and set off for the dining hall.

Bella's appetite had improved throughout the week, but she still chose her customary oatmeal and juice for breakfast, because it was easy on her stomach and somewhat comforting. It reminded her of her mother, who didn't cook much, but always made Bella oatmeal on the weekends, loaded with brown sugar and raisins. The amount of brown sugar had decreased over the years, but the huge handfuls of raisins remained.

"Good morning," she said softly with a smile as she slid into the chair between Edward and Jasper, Jasper holding it back for her slightly.

"Good morning, sweetheart," Jasper greeted her. "You look nice. Sleep well?"

"Mmhm," she nodded. "Thanks," she said, feeling the blush heat her cheeks at the compliment. She heard Edward's quiet laughter on her other side as he lightly rested his hand on her thigh, on the outside of her skirt. "You've got that master class this afternoon, right?" Bella asked Edward as she mixed up her oatmeal.

Edward nodded. "They're getting here around noon and doing the master class during the last two periods, so any of my students may miss yours," he said, "but Angela should have sent out an email."

"And there's an evening concert?" Jasper clarified.

"At 7," Edward answered. "Didn't we talk about this?" He asked, confused but smiling.

Bella shrugged. "I didn't write it down."

"And I have trouble keeping track of just my own schedule, remember," Jasper teased, stretching his arm across Bella's shoulders to Edward's.

"Right," Edward answered to their laughter.

After breakfast, Jasper and Bella walked together to their office with a few minutes before classes were set to start. Jasper made a cup of coffee in the machine that Bella got him for his birthday, and kissed her softly before he headed down to his classroom.

The day passed fairly easily. It had taken most of the previous two weeks to get her classes back to a sense of normality after James' attack on the campus, and Bella was finally starting to feel relaxed in front of her classes again. Lara had come back on Wednesday and was welcomed with open arms by all of her classmates. Though she seemed quieter, Bella was relieved to see that she was still able to smile, and she extended an invitation to the girl for "coffee" the following week.

Jasper, as usual, brought her lunch of a salad and a bowl of soup, and she found a chocolate chip cookie wrapped in a napkin under the soup bowl. They ate at their desks as they tended to do, catching up on a few things before classes resumed in the afternoon.

Edward was absent from dinner, but he'd warned them that might happen, since his students were likely to have a lot of questions, and it was tradition for him to take the visiting conductor to dinner. Jasper joked that he hoped Edward didn't take the man to the diner.

After dinner, Bella went back to her dorm with Alice, where they quickly changed into nice clothes for the evening performance, and they met up with the rest of the group, save Carlisle and Esme, who hadn't been feeling well all week, outside the auditorium.

Bella got the seat between Jasper and Edward, and they each held one of her hands throughout the performance, which was really good. Bella had a good time, and after the concert, the boys surprised her with a packed bag, and they went off to Carlisle and Esme's for the night, after Edward's assurance that despite her not feeling well, Esme didn't mind if they crashed over there two nights in a row.

"In a row?" Bella asked, surprised.

"I talked to mom and dad, and they're okay with us staying over on Saturdays as a rule," Edward explained. "I didn't really tell them anything, but they seemed to realize something and were pretty understanding," he outlined. "So, just so long as we're quiet tonight, it should be alright."

"Should I offer to make dinner tomorrow?" Bella asked, her brow furrowing as Jasper held open the driver's door of her car. She looked up at him confused.

"You'll need your car tomorrow, darlin'. Ride with Edward, I'll meet you there," he said, kissing her softly. He nodded at Edward over the top of the car and strode off across the parking lot toward his own car.

"If you'd like to cook, I'm sure she wouldn't mind, but Esme's a lot like you and doesn't really like to admit when she's not feeling up to anything," Edward said as he lowered himself somewhat awkwardly into her font seat, then reached for the seatbelt once he was settled.

"I guess I'll ask her in the morning," Bella said, setting off toward the Cullen home.

Edward took her right hand and kissed the back softly. "She'd appreciate spending time with you if you offer to help," Edward said with a wink, and Bella nodded.

Jasper arrived just a few minutes after Bella and Edward, and they moved quietly through the silent house; it wasn't that late, but none of them wanted to disturb Carlisle or Esme. They shut and locked the door to Edward's room and shared a quiet embrace in the middle of the room, enjoying a much needed moment between them. Bella kissed both of her lovers tenderly, and moved to sit on the edge of the bed when Jasper stepped away to drop their bag in the corner of the room.

Having gone the better part of the week without really having any significant intimacy with either man, Bella found her hands wandering, needing to touch them in any way she could. Her need for contact soon turned into something more playful, which then caused them to continually "shush" each other throughout their lovemaking, as they tried to keep quiet, but also tease the others into needing to be reminded.

Sated and relaxed, Bella fell asleep nude, sandwiched between her men, Jasper's breath warm on the back of her neck, Edward's heartbeat steady under her ear.

Bella woke alone in an empty bed Saturday morning. The boys had gotten up early to be at the swim meet and had let her sleep in. With a luxurious stretch she silenced the alarm on her cell phone before climbing carefully from the bed and heading to the shower.

After her shower, Bella put her hair into two long braids on either side of her head and dressed comfortably in a pair of fitted jeans and a long ivory sweater. She sat on the edge of the bed to tug on her socks and boots, and grabbed her purse before tripping her way downstairs.

The kitchen was still dark and quiet when Bella stepped inside. Frowning, she switched on the light then went to the electric kettle to start the hot water for the morning. As she was reaching into the cabinet for the tea, a soft throat clearing startled her and she spun around, her hand at her throat as the box of tea bags went skittering across the floor.

She was greeted with the sight of an amused Carlisle, dressed casually and in socked feet. "Good morning, Bella. I didn't mean to startle you," he said, stooping to pick up the wayward box of tea.

"Carlisle..." Bella breathed, ending on a short laugh. "It's alright, I've been jumpy, lately."

"Understandable," he agreed with a nod, crossing the room. He set the box of tea on the counter and folded Bella into a hug. "Up so early?"

"Therapy," she answered. "And I was hoping to chat with Esme a little before I went..."

"She's still feeling a bit under the weather, so I encouraged her to sleep in by turning off her alarm clock," Carlisle answered. "Is it a 'mom' thing, or would I suffice?" he asked lightly.

Bella smiled. "Oh, nothing in particular. I just wanted to see if I could help out and make dinner tonight."

"She would appreciate that, I think. What do you all have planned for today?" he asked, taking a seat behind the bar while Bella prepared the mugs.

"Jasper's got the intramural swim meet today, and Edward went with him this morning, and I'm meeting them there. Beyond that, not much on my end. I may grade papers at the meet." Bella dropped a tea bag into each mug and poured hot water over them. Carlisle took his black, Bella knew and she slid one mug over to him while she added a splash of milk to her own.

"Thank you," Carlisle said, taking the mug. "Well, we don't have anything much planned either, so if you would like to cook tonight, I'll leave it up to you, though be prepared for Esme to try to get in your way."

"Carlisle, that's not nice!" Bella rebuked him through a laugh, though she knew what he meant. Esme was a mom through and through and she just wanted to take care of her kids.

Carlisle laughed softly and nodded. Bella took the stool next to him and they continued to chat while they had their tea; it was too early still for Bella to grab breakfast, so she'd grab something on her way back to school for the meet. When their tea was done, Carlisle kissed the top of Bella's head and fixed a fresh mug before disappearing down the hall to his office. Bella rinsed her mug and left in the sink before making her way out, locking the front door behind her.

Therapy went as well as she expected.

From therapy Bella left for school. The plan was for Bella to meet them at the pool; Jasper had tried to convince Edward and Bella both that they didn't need to come watch the intramural competition, but they had both wanted to support Jasper, and Bella had a few students involved as well.

On her way back, she stopped at the grocery store and picked up a couple of sandwiches and bottles of water. Bella was sure that Edward and Jasper would have eaten breakfast, but she was starving, and she thought she'd be able to share with Edward, at least, if neither of them had thought to pack a lunch or snacks.

Bella parked in the visitor's lot near the gym and made her way to the indoor pool. Her faculty ID let her in the door for free, though the student gave her grocery bag a pointed look. "It's for the coach," she said, and the student let it slide.

Forks Academy was competing with a few other regional teams that weren't part of a larger swim league. The Academy didn't have a formal swim team, and only competed at the varsity level for football, basketball, baseball, softball, volleyball, and track. The meet was only planned for one day, so they were only competing a small number of strokes and lengths, and had planned for it to be over in the early afternoon, having started around eight in the morning.

Bella found Edward easily in the stands and made her way carefully across the pool deck to his section of the bleachers. He took her hand when she stepped up close enough on the bleachers and she settled close to his side, leaving her bag at his feet. "Hi," she greeted him with a smile.

"Hullo," he returned, looking fairly cheerful for someone who had to get up so early on a Saturday morning. "Sleep well?"

"I did, yes," she answered in the same teasing tone. "How's it going?"

Edward shrugged. "Honestly? I have no idea," he said with a laugh. "I think we're winning, but there's no scoreboard so I'm not sure. Jasper seems satisfied, though," he said, nodding toward where Jasper was kneeling at the edge of the pool talking to one of the students.

Bella laughed quietly. "Well, how many races have there been, and how many have we won?"

Edward shrugged. "I've kinda been doing work," he confessed sheepishly, gesturing to his messenger bag as his side.

Bella kissed his cheek. "I don't think he'd mind, considering he tried to get us to not even be here."

"Point," Edward agreed."What'd you bring?" he asked, nudging her grocery bag with his foot.

"Sandwiches, water, apples," she listed. "I wasn't sure either of you thought to bring snacks, and I haven't had breakfast yet."

"We ate at home, and the team's being taken care of," Edward explained, gesturing toward a small table of high protein snacks and bottled water. "But save him a sandwich, just in case," he advised. "Did you get a chance to talk to mom?" he asked as Bella reached into the bag for her turkey sandwich and bottle of water.

"No," she responded, slipping her finger under the flap of paper and tape. "She was still asleep, or at least in bed," she said with a frown. The paper caught on the corner of her nail and she winced as she tugged it free, leaving a piece of her nail and the side of her finger along with it. "Shit that hurts," she muttered, sticking her finger into her mouth. Thankfully, there wasn't any blood; it just stung.

Edward took her wrist and looked at her finger while she fumbled with her left hand to get her sandwich open. "No serious damage," he proclaimed. "And if we weren't in public, I'd kiss it better," he teased with a wink.

Bella kicked his shin. Lightly. "Behave."

"Yes, dear."

They passed the rest of the day companionably. From her over-sized purse she pulled a sweater and a seam ripper, and got to work unravelling it while she watched the swimmers.

"What are you doing, sweetheart?" Edward asked, curious.

"Alice picked up this sweater at a thrift store," she explained, holding it up. "She liked the yarn, but not the sweater, so I'm taking it apart to use the yarn to make a skirt from a pattern I found in a magazine."

"Huh," Edward said with a nod. "Okay."

Bella laughed softly and patted his thigh. By the time the meet was done she had three good sized balls of yarn tucked back away in her purse. She and Edward sat in the stands and waited for Jasper to finish dismissing all of his students. Forks Academy had done decently and came in second place overall.

"Hey, sweetheart," Bella greeted him. "You look beat," she offered fondly.

Jasper managed a half-smile. "It's been a long day," he said. "But it was good. Next time should be easier, right?"

"Right," Edward answered. "Come on, ready to go home?" he asked.

"Yes." Jasper nodded.

Edward took Bella's hand and helped her down the bleacher steps, Jasper on her other side. "Why don't you guys go on," she said when they reached the gym doors, giving Edward's hand a squeeze. "I told Carlisle I'd cook dinner, and I'm going to stop by the store on my way home. Any requests?"

Jasper shook his head. "Anything would be great, Bells." He kissed the top of her head.

Edward just shrugged. "I'm not in the mood for anything in particular, so whatever you come up with is fine."

Bella glanced at her watch. It was just after four-thirty, so if they hadn't already arrived, Emmett and Rosalie would already be at the house, and knowing Alice, in the weekend before her show, she'd be a couple of hours yet, since dinner wasn't usually served until after six. "Okay. I'll meet you back at the house." Noting that they were more or less alone, she kissed them each quickly, then took off for her car.

She made another quick trip by the grocery store, wandering the aisles for a few minutes until she decided on spaghetti and meatballs, garlic bread and salad. It was easy enough to do, and wouldn't take long to make. She was back in her car quickly and on her way to the house.

"Hey, baby Bells!" Emmett called from the couch as she stepped into the house, weighed down by three grocery bags. Jasper jumped up from one of the chairs to help her.

"You did not just nick-name me after cheese," Bella retorted. "Did you?"

"Uhm. Maybe?" Emmett said.

Rose thwapped him on the back of the head to general laughter, and after draping her jacket over the back of a chair, Bella followed Jasper and her grocery bags into the kitchen. She started sorting through them after Jasper had set them on the counter. "Here," she said, handing over a tub of spinach dip and a box of crackers. "That should keep Em occupied."

Jasper laughed and kissed her, a more lingering display of affection than they'd had a chance for so far that day. "Thanks for coming to the meet," he said softly against her lips. "Love you."

Bella felt her face heat up slightly and her pulse quicken, like it did almost every time one of her lovers said those words. "You're welcome. And I love you, too."

Jasper smiled and kissed her again quickly before returning to the living room and the others.

Bella rolled up the sleeves on her sweater and got to work with the meatballs first. Just as she was getting ready to stick her hands into the bowl of ingredients to mix the meat and start shaping the balls to bake, she heard the shuffle of feet on the linoleum. "Hi, Esme." Bella greeted her with a smile. "Feeling any better?"

Esme managed a soft smile as she eased onto one of the stools at the bar. "A bit. Thank you for managing dinner, dear."

"No problem. You know I don't mind," she chastised gently, smiling at Esme's answering chuckle.

"Yes, I know. Is there anything I can help with?"

Bella had anticipated the request. "Yes, actually. The butter should be soft. Can you mix up the garlic and parsley there and get the garlic bread ready to go?" Bella had pre-chopped the ingredients and sliced the bread already.

"Sure," Esme answered. "How was the meet today?" she asked as Bella sunk her hands into the gooey mixture.

"Good. We came in second. The students seemed happy with the result," she explained. "And I got a sweater pulled apart to recycle the yarn for Alice."

Esme quietly laughed again. "So, a productive day all around."

"Yes," Bella agreed. They continued to chat as Bella rolled the meatballs and got them onto a wire rack over a cookie sheet and slipped the two trays into the oven. She started the sauce and Esme ripped greens for the Caesar salad while Bella mixed up the dressing.

"Do you mind getting one of the boys to set the table?" Bella asked, stirring the sauce.

"Not at all," Esme answered, sliding from the stool a bit more easily than she'd gotten on. She disappeared from the kitchen and Edward and Jasper arrived a moment later.

"What's the matter, darlin'?" Jasper asked, stepping up behind her to deliver a hug. "You've got that little thoughtful frowny look goin' on."

She shrugged one shoulder as she stirred. "I'm sure it's nothing," she said with a shake of her head, and looked up and over her shoulder at Jasper, finding a smile. "Just an odd feeling, you know?"

"Yeah," Jasper agreed, kissing the top of her head and stepping back to accept the pile of plates that Edward was handing over. "Let me know if you wanna talk though, okay?"

"Of course, Jazzy. You too, Edward," she answered, kissing away the puppy dog look that had appeared on Edward's face. "Go set the table. Dinner's on in a few."

The boys left, and Rosalie and Alice arrived to help her carry everything to the table.

The meal was just as any other at the Cullen home, even given Esme's somewhat subdued attitude. She looked like she was feeling better, anyway, and assured them all it had just been the same respiratory bug that the rest of campus had had and she was feeling fine.

Bella hadn't thought to make anything for dessert, which almost had Emmett disowning her until she remembered that there was ice cream left over from the previous weekend and found enough toppings in the pantry for sundaes and all was forgiven.

Esme and Carlisle retired early, despite her previous statements of feeling better, and the rest of them watched a movie before Emmett, Rose, and Alice returned to campus. Once everyone else was gone, Bella, Jasper and Edward retired to their room upstairs. Jasper was pretty much exhausted from the day, so they didn't do much more than cuddle before he fell asleep between Bella and Edward.

Sunday morning they slept in and returned to campus after thanking Carlisle and Esme once more for letting them invade and getting breakfast at the diner. Bella went back to her room and caught up on the never ending pile of assignments to be graded while staying logged into the campus messenger and playing mediator for Jasper and Edward's teasing arguments.

The next week came and went quickly. Tuesday afternoon during her prep period, she met Lara for coffee after signing the girl out of her class. They talked about what had happened, and Bella apologized for not going to see her in the hospital. Lara said that she understood, and that she was working on writing about her experience at the suggestion of her own therapist.

Wednesday night at dinner they discussed plans for the weekend. Rosalie was all for a girls' night on Friday, and said that Esme had given her blessing for the girls to use the house and stay there for the night before baking the desserts for Alice's reception on Saturday. Emmett had then declared that the boys needed to get together, but they'd just stay on campus.

Friday went quickly. Exams in most of her classes meant Bella could write at her desk while she watched over the students. The concert with the Portland Symphony was earlier in the evening, so there wasn't time for much dinner before she had to rush back to her room to change out of the academy polo shirt and jeans she'd chosen for a casual campus Friday.

After the concert, she and Jasper went to meet Edward backstage. He was waiting with the conductor and was just shaking hands when Bella stepped through the door, Jasper's hand warm on her back through the light weight dress she was wearing.

"Hey," Edward greeted them. "Did you enjoy it?"

"Very much," Bella answered. "I just wanted to say goodnight before I left."

"What?" Edward asked.

"Girls' night?" Jasper reminded him. "We're going out with Emmett, remember?"

"Oh, right," Edward said, looking disappointed.

"Cheer up, sweetheart," Bella said, reaching for Edward's hand. "You'll get in some bonding time with your partner and your brother, and I'll have to let Rose and Alice braid my hair and paint my nails, and probably convince me to wax something I don't want to let anywhere near hot wax."

Edward's expression went from sad to hopeful in an instant, and Jasper laughed.

"No boys allowed," Rosalie called smoothly as she stepped through the door to the auditorium as well.

"But-" Edward protested with a pout.

Bella kissed him softly as Jasper laughed quietly behind him. "Tomorrow, sweetheart," she said as she patted his cheek. "I'll meet you at the gallery," she said, stepping away, letting her fingers brush against the stubble on his cheeks.

"Have a good time with the girls, darlin'," Jasper said as he kissed the top of her head and gave her a hug. "Don't worry, I'll keep him occupied." he winked.

Bella laughed and returned the hug. "Don't let Emmett get you into too much trouble," she said lightly, then went to collect Alice and Rose standing off to one side. Alice linked her arm with Bella's, and Bella waved over her shoulder at Edward and Jasper before they left the auditorium. They took Rose's car and stopped at the grocery store for necessities on their way to Esme and Carlisle's, where they let themselves in with Alice's key.

The plan was to have a long over-due girls' night before getting up to make the cookies for the reception in the morning. The house already smelled wonderful, which was probably due to Esme's getting ahead on the snacks she'd made for the gallery opening.

"Hello, girls," Esme greeted them as they entered the kitchen. "How was the concert?"

"It was really good," Alice answered, sliding onto one of barstools next to her aunt, while Bella and Rose placed their bags on the counter. "They played their Strauss program from this season. They premiered it a couple of weeks ago, and it was fantastic."

"I'm glad you had a good time," Esme said with a smile. "Well, Carlisle and I will be around, if you need anything," she said, closing up her magazine and giving Alice a one-armed hug. "Try to stay out of trouble."

Bella and Rose laughed as Alice pouted her protest. Esme gave Bella and Rose both hugs on her way out of the kitchen.

"Alright, let's see," Rose mused as she sorted through the ingredients they'd bought. "Best start with the chocolate, hm?"

"Well, it'll take the longest to make, anyway," Bella answered, pulling aside the ingredients for a chocolate gooey butter cake. She sorted out the two components and moved to Esme's stand mixer and got started, after popping the butter into a Pyrex measuring cup, then into the microwave to melt.

"Alice, you're in charge of the popcorn," Rose said, tossing the box of microwave ultra butter popcorn at her. "Think you can manage?"

Alice, very maturely, stuck her tongue out at Rose. "Yeah. Thanks."

Bella laughed. "Aw, Alice, we only tease you because we care."

Alice rolled her eyes and jumped from the stool, taking over at the microwave when Bella was finished. "Right. What am I going to do without you when you and those two gorgeous guys of yours finally get things together and move off campus?" She asked as she tore open the cellophane on one bag and stuck it into the microwave.

"Whoa?" Rose asked, looking up from where she'd started hulling strawberries. "It's that serious?"

"Yeah," Bella answered quietly, turning down the mixer and adding the powdered sugar. "We haven't talked or anything, but..."

"Hey, I get it," Rose said gently. "Emmett and I have been doing this for two years now, more or less. It's hard to work with the lack of privacy, and we don't have to be nearly as secretive about it as you guys," she said. "We manage, but sometimes only just."

Bella nodded. "We've taken to just staying here on Saturday nights," she confessed quietly. "We're already here for dinner, anyway, and it gives us the chance for a bit of privacy, not to mention a bed big enough for us for us to share." She smiled at Alice's snort. "What?"

"Nothing," Alice said quickly. "Bunch of pervs," she said under her breath, laughing.

"Hey!" Bella protested, reaching behind her for the stem of one of the strawberries and tossed it at Alice's head. "It's not like that!"

Alice laughed and ducked. "Uh-huh."

"Seriously, Bells," Rose added. "How is it? The sex?" She turned and leaned her back against the bar to face Bella and Alice.

Bella blushed and focused on the cake pan she was pouring batter into.

"Oh, Bella, don't go all shy and prudish on us now," Rose wheedled.

"I haven't had near enough wine to talk about this yet," Bella responded, smoothing down the top layer of the cake before popping it in the oven.

"Ta-da!" Alice announced, brandishing the corkscrew from her aunt's utensil drawer. "Rosie, fetch us some glasses, yeah?"

Bella sighed softly as she set the timer on the oven and Rose moved behind her to dig out three wine glasses. She knew the "talk" was going to be part of the evening, but that didn't really make it any easier. She accepted the glass of white wine that Alice passed her as she turned and leaned against the counter, warmth from the oven seeping through her clothes.

The microwave beeped and Alice pulled the steaming bag of popcorn out, dumping it into a waiting bowl before starting another. She passed the bowl to Rose, who took a handful, then to Bella. "So?"

"So what?" Bella asked, really hoping they'd just drop it.

"How is it?" Alice pressed. Rosalie nodded, looking excitedly interested.

"Alice, I get that you need someone to live vicariously through at the moment, but Rose? Emmett's not enough to satisfy you now, you need cheap thrills through asking about my love life?"

"Oh, Emmett's quite good at satisfying me, babe," Rose answered with a smirk. "But this is the first time since I've known you that you've had a love life worth asking about. So. Spill."

Bella shook her head. "No."

Alice and Rose both gasped, wide smiles on their faces as they mocked their exaggerated horror at her refusal, hands flying to their chests. "Has our Bella grown a backbone?" Rose asked, astonishment in her voice.

Bella rolled her eyes and took a drink from her glass, pushing off the counter to move to the side of the bar with the stools. She sat, her wine glass at her elbow as she reached for the loaf of crusty bread, cutting board, and serrated knife that was out and began cutting good sized slices.

"Bel-la," Alice whined. "Okay," she said after a moment. "How about we start simpler. When was the first time?"

"Jasper's birthday," Bella answered, not looking up from the bread.

"So, what was that, like a month after you got together?" Rose asked, going back to hulling the strawberries while Alice munched on the popcorn as she opened the sub of seafood spread and package of soft Swiss cheese they'd bought to go with the bread and box of crackers.

Bella nodded. "Three weeks."

"Why so long?" Rose asked, sounding honestly curious.

Bella shrugged. "Timing, I guess. Edward was out of town that first weekend after, then there was James..." she trailed off. "And that whole lack of privacy thing."

"Not to mention the really small beds," Rose said under her breath, earning a nod from Bella that had Alice snorting with laughter again. Rose flipped Alice off. "Just you wait, shorty. You'll see someday."

"Hey, Kate and I...well...let's say that the bed in Bella's room didn't go completely unused," Alice retorted, flicking a piece of popcorn at Rose.

"Thanks, Alice," Bella said dryly.

"Oh, it was cleaned before you even thought of moving in," Alice said with another roll of her eyes. She pulled the second bag of popcorn from the microwave and dumped it in the bowl. "Are we ready yet?" she asked.

Bella nodded as she finished with the bread. "Hand me a plate."

Alice handed her a plate and Bella loaded up the sliced bread and grabbed the containers of cheese and the knives Alice had pulled from the drawer and balanced them in one hand, her glass of wine in the other. Alice followed Bella out into the darkened living room with the bowl of popcorn and her own glass of wine, and Rose carried out the strawberries and the two small trays of California rolls in one hand, her wine glass and the bottle in the other.

They shifted the chairs around a bit once they'd left all the food on the coffee table. Alice and Bella each claimed one of the large chairs and Rosalie took the couch. There was only one small lamp on in the room, though the lights from the kitchen provided just enough additional illumination that it was cozy instead of possibly creepy.

Bella snagged a handful of popcorn and settled back in her chair, tucking her legs up underneath her.

"So? Jasper's birthday?" Rosalie prompted, slathering a slice of bread with the soft cheese.

Bella swallowed. "What about it?" she asked with a small grin.

"That good, huh?" Rose tipped her glass in Bella's direction and Alice "hmmed" with a smile of her own.

"I don't kiss an' tell, Rose," Bella responded, but she had a feeling the blush and the smile gave her away.

"You don't have to, girl, with a look like that," the blonde answered. "I am curious though. Jasper..."

"Was a perfect gentleman," Bella concluded before she could ask.

Rose looked slightly disappointed, but that was all Bella had to say on the subject.

"Okay, but seriously, Bella," Alice started. "You're happy and satisfied, right? Because with James," she continued quickly, "it sure didn't seem like you were either very much of the time, and honestly a girl's toys can only be her best friend for long."

"Yes," Bella answered after a beat. "I'm happy and properly satisfied, you nosy perv," she said with a smirk, which softened into a smile as she briefly reflected on their first night together. "I'm not gonna lie, there was a bit of anxiety on all sides," she said, pausing to take a sip. "James always just expected things and Jasper was probably terrified about disappointing me, and I was a bit nervous about the same, but it worked. It just does," she responded to their skeptical and curious looks. "We're figuring it out and having fun while we do," she said, feeling her face heat with another blush to Alice and Rose's soft laughter.

"As long as you're happy, Bella," Alice said with a smile. "Though it's nice to see Edward back to himself, too."

Rose nodded. "Yeah. Emmett was really starting to worry, about the time Jasper showed up," she said thoughtfully. "It'd been years, and he was scared that Edward was never going to get back to being the kid that Emmett had grown up with," she confessed. "He was to the point where he was getting ready to try to stage some kind of intervention to get Edward into therapy, to try to get him to talk to someone about everything before he sunk too much farther into the depression that I don't think Edward even recognized he'd fallen into. Sure, he seemed to accept his fate," Rose mused. "But Emmett didn't buy it. It hurt him to see his brother like that and even though meeting you helped," she said with a nod at Bella, "and brought back part of him, the last seven months or so...well, Emmett's happier," she concluded with a wink.

Alice and Bella's laughter rang through the room, and Rose looked pleased with herself. Bella understood what Rose was saying, though. Bella had had several conversations with Esme over the two years that she'd been in Forks about how worried she was about her youngest son since his accident three years previous. Bella was also glad that Jasper had come into their lives, not only because he'd been her own personal hero, but because he had, like Rose said, helped to bring Edward back from the self-imposed isolation he'd been in for years.

"Speaking of happiness and satisfaction," Rose said, looking at Alice. "It's been five months, Alice. It's about time you get back out there, don't you think?"

Alice shrugged as she took a drink of her wine. "Yeah. Maybe. Kate and I were together for a year, and I just don't know that I'm ready for anything."

"I'm not saying you have to go out and a relationship right now, Alice," Rosalie said. "But there's nothing wrong with a casual hook up now and then," she said suggestively.

Alice nodded. "Yeah," she sighed. "I just. I'm okay on my own for now," she explained. "I'm focusing on my art and my classes. Your wedding is this summer, and I'm kind of just enjoying being single again. And yes," she continued with a smug grin. "I'm plenty satisfied, thank you very much."

"Yeah, but you're keeping Duracell in business," Rose said with a snort.

"Actually, Energizers keep going and going and..." Alice retorted to laughter.

Their conversation spun off into a discussion of some of their favorite toys, and though Bella's toy box was fairly basic, Alice and Rose agreed with her choices and Rose offered a couple of suggestions that Edward and Jasper might enjoy as well.

They talked and drank and ate until late into the night, finishing off both bottles of wine and nearly all the food. When the cake was done, Bella just carried the pan into the living room and set it on a hot plate and they ate it with forks right out of the pan. More than slightly tipsy, they cleaned everything up before they headed to bed, Rose to Emmett's room, Bella to Edward's, and Alice, somewhat reluctantly, alone to the guest room.

After she scrubbed her face and pulled her hair back for the night, Bella texted Edward and Jasper to say good night, and smiled at their responses, saying that they loved her. Finally, before bed, she took two painkillers and drank a whole bottle of water, hoping to not wake up too miserable in the morning.

"Ungh," Bella groaned when the alarm when off in the morning. Her mouth felt dry and tasted worse, but at least she'd woken headache free. She stumbled to the bathroom in a pair of Edward's sweats and a t-shirt and brushed her teeth twice before she was satisfied. With a morning of baking ahead of her she didn't bother to shower, just ran a brush through her hair and tied it up in a knot secured with a pair of sticks from her bag, and changed into the yoga pants and tank tops she'd packed.

Esme was already downstairs, though Bella shouldn't have been surprised; it was after ten in the morning. "Good morning, sweetheart. Have a good night?" she asked.

"Mostly," Bella answered with a wink.

Esme laughed softly. "There's eggs and sausage already made and waiting for you. The others aren't up yet, but it probably won't be long; I heard the showers go on upstairs."

Bella returned her laughter. "Thanks, Esme." She poured a mug of hot water for tea and pulled the butter from the fridge to start softening for the cookies. Carlisle was at the table with the paper and Bella joined him after serving herself from the dishes on the stove top that were keeping warm.

"Good morning, Bella," Carlisle said with a smile."Did you three stay out of trouble last night?"

"Of course, dad," Bella answered with a smirk, causing Carlisle to look up from the paper sharply.

"You're not too old to be put over my knee for your tone, young lady," he answered sternly, which just caused Bella to break out in peals of laughter. She laughed so hard tears started forming in her eyes and by the time she'd settled down, Carlisle was chuckling too, and Esme, Alice, and Rosalie were standing around the table looking at the two of them like they were crazy.

Bella wiped the tears from her eyes and turned to her breakfast, giggling every now and again when Carlisle met her eyes and winked, while Rose and Alice got their breakfasts and coffee.

Once the breakfast dishes had been cleared, Carlisle abandoned the kitchen and Bella heard the television switch on in the other room as they returned to the kitchen to start baking. Bella had three batches of cookies planned, Esme had another appetizer, and Alice and Rose were going to work on the veggie and fruit platters. Alice had explained that in doing the catering themselves she was able to display more art in the show, having been able to rent more space at the gallery rather than paying a caterer. None of them minded, and it gave them a chance to get caught up on things other than their sex lives (though Bella didn't doubt that Esme would've fully participated in that conversation; she'd talked with Bella about her sex life with Carlisle many times before when Bella'd needed a more experienced woman's ear).

Knowing that she'd be busy in the morning, Bella had cancelled her regular Saturday morning session with Dr. Stevens. Bella made lemon spritz cookies, traditional chocolate chip (without nuts in case of allergies) and a simple shortbread, half of which she left plain, the other half she dipped in a chocolate ganache. Esme made stuffed mushrooms to round out her phyllo cups and baked off the bread for the bruschetta topping she'd made the previous evening.

Carlisle ran out to get them lunch at one point, earning thankful smiles from all of them as they unwrapped the sandwiches he'd brought. After they'd eaten, they returned to packing everything up and stacking the trays and platters on the table.

"I need a shower," Bella announced, sticky from the heat of the kitchen. "What time do we need to be there?" she asked.

"Three," Alice answered. "The show starts at four and goes until the gallery closes at eight," she explained. "The gallery owner is providing the wine, to promote a friend of his."

Bella glanced at the clock on the microwave. She had a couple of hours. "Okay. I'll be down soon."

"I don't need to pick out your clothes?" Alice called after her.

"I've got it!" Bella called back, swallowing back a laugh. She knew Alice just wanted this show to go perfectly and having one of her best friends show up in rags or not matching wouldn't do. But Bella had carefully planned and Rose had approved, so all Bella was worried about was getting her hair to cooperate.

Bella lingered in the shower, letting the hot water relax the slight tension in her back and shoulders. She wrapped up in Edward's threadbare robe when she was finished and twined her hair up in a towel turban. From her bag she pulled a pair of pantyhose and a pair of cheeky shorts with a coordinating bra. She dried off with another towel and liberally smeared lotion over her body before shimmying into her panties and hose, then slipped into her bra.

She carried the blowdryer from her bag back into the bathroom and set to work drying her hair in sections. Bella had been toying with the idea of getting it cut; it was nearly to her waist with layers around her face, but it was becoming slightly unmanageable given her schedule, and the temptation to just throw it into a bun or ponytail each morning grew stronger every day. She took her time with the blow dryer and brush, and her hair fell in gentle waves down her back. When she was finished she stood in front of the mirror. Her hair parted naturally to the left, and it was laying just right so that she decided to leave it down and natural, after spritzing on a light bit of hairspray.

Eyeliner and mascara suited her for makeup, and she carried everything back to her bag in the bedroom.

Bella's dress was brown and sleeveless, with large stylized flowers in an off white color. She took her time pulling it on, smoothing her hands down once everything had fallen itno place. Rosalie had helped her choose a pair of low heeled sandals that matched. Bella thought the whole outfit was nice enough she could wear to school later in the spring, but chic enough to suit the gallery opening.

When she was dressed, Bella stepped into her shoes, grabbed the small handbag she'd brought along for the night, and the matching wrap, and made her way downstairs. Alice greeted her with a happy squeal, and Bella winked at Rose; they'd chosen correctly.

Esme was dressed in a tasteful black cocktail dress, and Carlisle had changed into a pair of slacks with a dark button up shirt, the top button undone with no tie. Rosalie had chosen a red dress that was more understated than Bella had expected, while Alice was dressed in one of own skirt and top creations.

They loaded all the food into the trunk of Carlisle's Mercedes and Alice rode with her aunt and uncle to the gallery while Bella and Rosalie followed in Rose's car. Bella would be returning to the Cullen's house with Edward and Jasper after they went out for dinner as a group when the gallery closed and the show was over.

Rosalie parked next to Edward's Volvo in the parking lot (in a regular spot despite the handicapped placard), and they walked across the blacktop to where the others were helping unload the supplies from Carlisle's car. Rose and Bella each grabbed a tray and followed the others inside.

The gallery was brightly lit and Bella recognized many of the pieces on display from Alice's collection. She set her tray down on the table with the others and took a longer moment to glance around.

"You look gorgeous, darlin'," Jasper's voice said softly in her ear. "I like it when you wear your hair down like this," he breathed, and Bella felt the wash of his breath across her neck.

"Jazzy," she warned in a low voice.

He laughed quietly and kissed her cheek. "Sorry."

"No you're not," she answered with a smile, turning to show him she wasn't truly upset. They were going to need to discuss their public life, soon. "And thank you." She took in his form, from his boots to the grey striped shirt and felt her smile broaden slightly. "You look good, too."

"I try, ma'am," he teased, tipping an imaginary hat. "Alice has a few things for us to finish. I'll see you later. Say hi to Edward," he said, waggling his eyebrows at her.

She swatted at him as he walked off, laughing. Bella turned back around and caught a glimpse of Edward out of the corner of her eye. He was dressed in all black, and looked really good in the basic color. He was sorting out the appetizer trays and he winked at Bella when he caught her eye.

"Bella!" Alice called, and she tore her eyes away to see what her friend needed.

She was kept busy right up until the time guests started to arrive, and thankfully, the gallery owner had hired waiters to be on hand for the night so that Bella could mingle and enjoy herself. She saw several students among the attendants, along with other members of the community she knew, and she was distracted for awhile as she met and greeted those that arrived as Alice worked the crowd. Finally, though, she was able to snag a glass of sparkling wine from one of the servers and began to work her way slowly through the exhibit, half-way keeping an eye open for Edward or Jasper, who had disappeared.

The show was broken up into several sections. In one nook Alice had set up several mannequins displaying her formal wear designs that she'd been working on. In another corner was a new collection of pottery that Bella hadn't seen before, ranging from useful looking cups to not-so-useful looking...pieces. There were also a few student works scattered throughout, and also some of Alice's other mediums; but the main exhibit was Alice's photography display, titled "Love and Family."

A number of the photos were candid shots, and Bella recognized herself and the family in many of them. She spent a long moment studying a picture she recognized as having been taking the morning after Halloween; it had been cropped at the shoulders, though, so no one was identifiable. Bella had only the body language to go on, but she could see even then that Jasper and Edward had cared about her in the way they were cuddled together on the floor. She spent another few minutes smiling softly at a photo of Jasper, clearly not seeing the camera as he studied his phone, an absent smile on his face. The caption read "Early morning messages between lovers."

"I remember that morning," Edward said from behind her, looking over her shoulder at the picture of Jasper. "That was the day Rose thought she was pregnant. Alice woke Jasper up and some insane hour and after breakfast she dragged him down to her studio. We were texting back and forth," he explained softly.

Bella wondered idly if Jasper looked like that when he thought about her.

"Yes, he does, love," Edward answered quietly. "He had that exact smile on his face when you texted last night."

Bella's smile softened a bit as she nodded.

"And Jasper was right," he said, his voice closer. "You look very beautiful tonight." He kissed her softly and quickly behind her ear. "I think we'll have fun getting you out of that dress tonight," he said lowly, sending a shiver down her spine.

"I swear, I can't take either of you out in public," she groused, but she was smiling.

Edward laughed softly. "You love it."

"Hm," she mused, biting her lip to contain the grin that wanted to take over her face.

Edward kissed her again quickly. "Come on, I was sent to find you. Esme was looking for you."

She nodded and let him take her hand and lead her away. They found Esme, who was talking to another woman. Alice had introduced Esme as one of the women responsible for the catering, and one of the patrons had asked about the lemon cookies. Bella gave the woman her email address and asked her to email, that way she could provide her with the recipe.

Things began to wind down from there. Bella had hardly seen Alice since they arrived, and she found out through Esme that several pieces had been sold, and many of the student pieces had garnered great interest as well.

When everything was packed back up and the gallery was closed and dark everyone piled back in the cars and made their way to one of Alice's favorite restaurants for the celebratory dinner that Alice declared should be for both her and Bella, since she deserved it for the writer's conference too, despite the way it had ended.

It was a lively meal, and they made sure to leave a hearty tip for their server, a young woman who flirted whole heartedly with Carlisle, much to Esme's amusement.

After dinner, Emmett, Rose, and Alice returned to campus in Rose's car, and Bella rode back to the Cullen's house with Edward and Jasper, snug in the front seat while Jasper toyed with her hair from behind in the back seat.

And it didn't take long at all for Edward and Jasper to help her out of her clothes once they reached the privacy of the bedroom.

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Apparently, this fic has been nominated for several awards over at Jasper's Darlin's "Everything's Bigger in Texas" contest. Please check out the nominated fics and vote: www . jaspers darlins . blogspot . com (take out the spaces)


	51. Chapter 50: Small Victories

**Thank you as always to Naelany and wishingforlove for their fantabulous beta efforts. Also, special thanks to drtammy1511 for the professional advice ;)**

**we're going to have a bit of overlap, since I thought we'd get a look at the boys' night, too**

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In the two weeks that elapsed since Jasper's birthday, he noticed a remarkable improvement in Bella. Though he had to admit he missed having her in his bed at night, he was relieved that she was starting to manage on her own once again; it was a long time until the end of the semester and their chances at long-term cohabitation. He, Edward, and Bella tried to find time to talk every day. It was rough, with all the extra activities they supervised on top of their course loads, and some nights it came down to having conversations through the campus' IM system as they worked or got ready for bed. Just as Bella began to heal, Jasper was learning to wrestle with his own inner demons and let go of the guilt he'd been carrying since James had been killed. He had worked in a couple of extra sessions with Dr. Jones (Edward had come to one other besides that first one), and Jasper finally felt like things were getting back to a normal balance.

With the spark back in Bella's eyes and the return of her appetite, Edward seemed happier as well, and so on Friday night after the Portland Symphony concert, Jasper was more than happy to see her excited about spending time with Alice and Rosalie.

After hearing about the girls' plans to take over the living room at his parents' house, Emmett insisted on the boys getting together for the evening. He'd picked up a couple six packs of beer (and limes for the Corona, Jasper was pleased to see) and food they could easily heat in the microwave, though they'd probably order pizza since they hadn't had a chance for dinner.

They settled down in Emmett's room, since he had the bigger TV, and Jasper sat back, his arm draped over Edward's shoulders as Emmett started ribbing on his brother for the way he'd pouted when Bella had left with the girls.

"Yeah, Em, like you have room to talk. I've seen that same look on your face when Rose goes off without you," Edward shot back.

Jasper laughed quietly.

"Well, y'know, Rosie 'n me…we have a very healthy physical relationship," Emmett said.

Edward snorted his swallow of beer which made him start coughing. "Seriously?" He gasped out as he spluttered. "You two have been known to fuck like bunnies whenever the chance arrived, is what you really meant to say, right?"

"Dude, give me some credit for _trying_ to be tactful," Emmett said with a pout. "But since you brought it up…" he said, trailing off suggestively at the end of his sentence.

Jasper laughed as Edward groaned. "I should have known," Edward muttered, shaking his head before draining half his beer. "You are aware of the fact that you've broached the topic of our sex lives with two men who regularly sleep together, and their third partner, who you happen to view as a little sister, right?"

Emmett shrugged. "Yeah. So?"

Jasper watched the interplay, amused. It'd been too long since he'd had any really close male friends and he missed it.

Edward sighed. "Just ask, Emmett."

"When?" Emmett asked bluntly.

"My birthday," Jasper responded.

"Dude," Emmett said with an appreciative nod. "Birthday sex," he said knowingly.

"Oh, god," Edward muttered, reaching for another beer. "My brother's a Neanderthal."

"Naw, you're just a snob," Emmett retorted.

Jasper leaned in closer to Edward and nuzzled him lightly as he whispered into his ear. "Loosen up, babe," he teased lightly.

Edward huffed, but Jasper felt him relax slightly.

"Okay, I don't want any details, since it's Bells an' all," Emmett continued. "But…it was okay? I mean – Jas, you were totally freaked out about the whole possibility not that long ago."

Jasper nodded. He saw where Emmett was coming from, even if the bigger man wasn't doing a great job of articulating it. "Yeah, it was…well, better than okay." He finished his beer and set the bottle aside.

Emmett nodded. "And she's doing alright?" He asked. "I mean…we've seen you guys around and such and she seems better, but…"

Edward nodded. "She really is. She's talking to us again and I think she's finally starting to understand that none of it was directly her fault."

"It's still going to take some time," Jasper added, accepting another beer from Emmett and relaxing back into the wall behind him. "She still has trouble sleeping sometimes, and she really doesn't like it if we sneak up behind her," he admitted bashfully. The elbow to the gut he'd gotten in response to that move had taught him not to do it again anytime soon. "But it's better than she was."

"Glad to hear it," Emmett said honestly. "I was worried about her."

"We all were," Jasper said. "It was a really tense week, but I think after we had some time together we were able to figure things out," he said vaguely. He didn't need to discuss their 'new beginning' with Emmett; it wasn't that he didn't trust Emmett to keep his confidence (he obviously could, since he hadn't even told Rosalie about them), it was that he didn't want to reveal one of their private intimate moments.

"I'm happy for you guys," Emmett said. "No, really," he responded to Edward's quiet snort. "I think you two are fantastic together, and I know you were both happy with things, but throwing Bella into the mix has just seemed to make everything right for you guys," Emmett said. "I know it's unconventional, but so long as you're all happy, I've got your backs."

"Thanks, Em," Jasper said quietly sincere. That meant a lot to him.

Edward nodded and shared a look with his brother that Jasper couldn't quite interpret.

"So what's the plan, then?" Emmett continued after opening another beer for himself.

Jasper felt Edward shrug against him. "Dunno. It'll depend on if Jasper gets the full time position or not. We've kind of talked about looking for a place off campus, since it's hard to find any privacy here."

"Tell me about it," Emmett muttered, saluting them with his bottle. "That's one of the things Rose and I are doing over Spring Break – house hunting. She wants to have a place ready when we get back from the honeymoon."

"Which is where, again?" Edward asked.

"Hawaii," Emmett said. "She wanted beaches, and I wanted somewhere we could drink the water without having to spend the bulk of the trip on anti-diarrheal meds," he said dryly to Edward and Jasper's barks of laughter. "We're not leaving until a couple days after the wedding, though. We want some time to unwind, rather than jumping straight onto a plane after what's sure to have been a week of madness, and Rose wants to spend a bit of time with her family while they're here."

Jasper smiled. He could only imagine.

They talked a bit more about the wedding plans (or how Emmett was agreeing to pretty much whatever Rose wanted) and briefly discussed Edward's role as best man and his responsibility for the bachelor party. From there they wandered into their Spring Break plans, and before Jasper knew it, it was two in the morning and the beer was gone. Bella had texted around midnight, and Jasper and Edward had both responded, to Emmett's amusement. If Jasper remembered correctly, the exact words were "you're both so totally whipped."

He and Edward stumbled through the shared space of the kitchen and tumbled into bed together. They were both on the tipsy side of exhausted, and though they tussled and teased, they fell asleep wrapped around each other before they could get up to much.

They slept in on Saturday, waking late in the morning and grumbling at each other under their headaches as they untangled and Jasper went in search of pain killers. He returned with the bottle and his mug of water, and they both took a few and snuggled back up for awhile. Jasper dozed back off, and woke an hour or so later feeling a bit better. He left Edward sleeping while he showered and made coffee, then woke his lover with a cup.

After their coffee, Edward seemed to come around, and he rotated through the shower before they headed off to brunch. They didn't need to be at the gallery until three, but they'd slept late enough that after they finished eating, they split up to change and met back up at Edward's car, so that Jasper could make it to the hospital for at least a half-hour of the monthly gathering.

Edward was welcomed back by the children, and he helped Jasper sing a few songs. A couple kids asked after Bella, since she'd been with him last time, and Jasper told them that she was with her other friends that morning, but that he'd bring her back another time. They didn't have quite enough time to stay for the monthly treat, but Jasper made sure to say hello to his friend Shelly before they left and headed for the gallery. Before they left, Jasper promised he'd be back for the Easter celebration the next weekend.

Bella looked lovely in her brown dress and Jasper smiled at the way she grew flustered when he'd complimented her and gently teased her before wandering off to see to the list of things Alice had emailed them that morning that still needed to be finished. They got everything completed just as the doors opened, and Jasper began to wander around the gallery taking in the exhibit.

Though he'd known that one of Alice's projects had been along the lines of 'love and family,' he was slightly shocked to see how often he ran across pictures of himself, or the rest of the family. Some of the moments captured he couldn't even remember. Jasper took them in slowly, smiling at the pictures of Carlisle and Esme sharing a moment, and Rosalie and Emmett laughing as they fought over what looked like a video game controller. He paused and watched Edward and Bella quietly discuss a photo of himself, looking at his cell phone with a soft smile on his face. Jasper had good memories of that day, despite how exhausted he remembered being, and he laughed quietly to himself as Edward glanced back over his shoulder and winked as he led Bella away.

Once the gallery had closed down and Alice was literally beaming at not only her success, but that of the students she'd allowed to participate in the show, they all piled back into cars to meet up for dinner in a combined celebration for Alice's show and Bella's conference. Jasper and Edward flanked Bella as they escorted her to Edward's car, each of them with an arm around her back so they were all three linked together.

Jasper held the passenger door to the Volvo and held Bella's hand as she lowered herself into the seat, smiling up at him as he closed the door. Jasper slid into the back seat as Edward climbed in behind the wheel.

"So, did you girls have a good night?" Jasper asked as he reached over his shoulder for the seat belt and Edward started the car.

"Yep," Bella answered.

"Got anything new to show us?" Edward asked teasingly.

Bella smacked his chest with the back of her hand and Jasper laughed. "Nope. We talked, drank too much wine, and ate high calorie food. There were no beauty products present." She blushed a little.

"Oh yeah?" Edward asked, glancing over at her. "Why the blush then?"

"What happens on girls' night stays at girls' night," Bella sing-songed.

Jasper laughed as Edward huffed. When they stopped at a light, Bella leaned over and kissed his cheek. "We had a good time, and got in some long overdue girl talk," Bella said softly. "But I did miss having you both in my bed last night."

Jasper leaned forward as much as his seatbelt would allow and kissed her cheek. "We missed you too, sweetheart, but I'm glad you had a good time."

Bella smiled at him over her shoulder. "Thanks, Jazzy. I'm assuming from the lack of phone calls to bail you out that Emmett was well behaved and you boys stayed out of trouble?"

"Yes, ma'am," Jasper answered. "We were perfect gentlemen."

"Mm," Bella hummed. "Not sure I can believe that."

"Hey, now," Edward protested to Bella's quiet laughter.

"I know, I'm just teasing," she responded. "Do I need to search you two for any new marks?" she asked.

"What would make you think that, darlin'?" Jasper asked.

"You were with Emmett," she said, as if that explained everything.

"No new marks, love," Edward responded. "We had some drinks and didn't leave campus. There's a reason I don't let him take me out drinking anymore," he said with a sigh. "Though at least I was sober enough to avoid the tattooing."

"Emmett has a tattoo?" Jasper asked.

Bella giggled and Edward groaned. "Yes," Edward answered with a sigh. "We'd been out drinking, before the accident," he explained. "Emmett being Emmett decided that he wanted to get some ink, and we wound up at a small shop." Edward sighed again. "He ended up with an image of a chocolate molecule tattooed on his lower back."

Jasper's chuckle mixed with Bella's giggles in the car, amplified slightly by Edward's exasperation, even years later, with his brother's behavior. "Well, at least it's something unique," Jasper offered.

Bella was still laughing as they pulled into the parking lot of the restaurant. When Jasper held the door for her she was still giggling, running her thumb under her eyes to clear away any moisture. He leaned into the car and kissed her softly before taking her hand and helping her out. They walked into the restaurant like they'd left the gallery, Edward and Jasper's arms crossed over Bella's back.

They joined the others inside where they took up a large table but somehow managed to still maintain a somewhat intimate environment with all eight of them. Their server was a young woman who quickly grasped the dynamics of the group and flirted shamelessly with Carlisle. Esme got a kick out of it, and Jasper thought that Carlisle might have also, though he was trying to hide it.

Emmett, Rosalie, and Alice returned to campus and Jasper and his lovers followed Esme and Carlisle back to the house for the night.

Esme shot them a knowing look as they headed upstairs together, and Jasper knew they all had similar expressions on their faces; Bella's was lit with a blush and Jasper knew his own ears were hot.

"We're going to have to talk to them eventually," Edward grumbled as he closed and locked his bedroom door behind them.

"Is that really so bad?" Bella asked, wrapping her arms around Edward's waist and pressing her lips to his clothes-covered chest. "It'd be nice to not have to hide, especially here," she said thoughtfully.

"No," Edward responded with a sigh. He kissed the top of her head as his arms went around her and started toying with the zipper on her dress. "It wouldn't be a bad thing," he agreed.

Bella smoothed her hands down Edward's chest as Jasper circled around behind him. Her fingers worked at his belt. "They know already anyway," she said softly. "Or if they don't, they suspect. We'll figure it out, sweetheart," she promised.

Jasper rested his chin on Edward's shoulder. "It'll be okay," he whispered against Edward's neck.

Edward relaxed into Jasper's body and nodded, and his attention focused back on the woman in his arms who was slowly stripping him of his belt and unfastening the buttons of his shirt. Jasper let his hands wander as he and Edward slowly removed Bella's clothing, leaving everything in a puddle in the middle of the floor when she stood, nearly completely unselfconscious in front of them.

Their love-making was slow and tender and sweet. They had, through the course of the weeks since Jasper's birthday, found that there had been nothing for them to worry about, in terms of intimacy. They came together easily; everything just seemed to fit, literally and figuratively, Jasper thought with a smile. Bella still hesitated sometimes to ask for what she wanted, but Jasper and Edward both understood, and made it a point sometimes to ask her directly.

They fell asleep in a sated pile of limbs. Sometime in the night, Jasper pulled away (as much as he could in the bed barely big enough for the three of them), overheated from their warmth and cramped from the scrunched up position.

Sunday morning was more or less a repeat of the two previous Sundays. They slept late and thanked Carlisle and Esme for letting them stay over before grabbing a leisurely breakfast out and returning to campus. Jasper worked on paperwork and writing exams for a few hours, then turned to the neglected history club reading until dinner.

After dinner, and bidding Bella and Alice a pleasant evening, Jasper and Edward made their way across to the music building and rehearsal hall, Jasper's guitar strapped across his shoulders in the new bag Edward had gotten him for his birthday. They hadn't met as a group before, but everyone had had the music for a week. After Sunday, they'd only have Tuesday and Thursday evening. Jasper wasn't worried, but he could sense Edward's anxiety.

"What's wrong, babe?" Jasper asked as he pulled open the door to the music building for Edward to pass through

Edward hesitated a moment. "You know, I haven't played for anyone outside my family or students in three years?"

Jasper nodded as he caught up. "Nervous?"

"A bit," Edward admitted.

Jasper took his hand and ran his thumb across Edward's knuckles as they walked. "It's just practice. These are your colleagues and friends, and you wouldn't let us talk you into a bigger solo part, so you're going to be fine."

Edward laughed humorlessly. "I know. It's just…"

"Kinda scary?" Jasper finished his thought.

"Yeah," Edward muttered.

Jasper squeezed his hand. He wouldn't trivialize Edward's feelings by telling him he had nothing to worry about, when he clearly felt that there was. Instead he just lent his quiet support and belief that everything would be fine if Edward would let it, and they entered the rehearsal room.

Dave Sanchez was already in the room setting up. The math professor also taught string bass lessons to three students on campus and played occasionally in jazz bands in the area. They greeted each other while Edward pointed out to Jasper where the equipment was stored so he could pull out an amplifier.

While Jasper set up, two other faculty members arrived. He recognized Susanna Brightling, who Edward had told him ran the program for the younger students on campus and played tenor sax, so Edward had invited her to join the group, since her younger jazz band would be performing Friday night as well. He did not know the other man who quickly pulled the drum kit from the same closet Jasper had retrieved the amplifier and began setting it up.

Just as they were all settling down, the soft sounds of warm ups clashing against each other, another woman skittered into the room. "Sorry, the baby wouldn't go down," she apologized as she set her case on a chair and pulled out a slim music folder and a trumpet.

"No problem, Jae, we haven't started yet," Edward answered easily as she fit her mouthpiece into her trumpet and blew some warm air through. Edward quickly introduced everyone from the piano bench, and Jasper learned that Jae was Dr. Jennifer Jamisen, one of the other music department faculty. He hadn't met her previously because she'd been on maternity leave Fall semester.

Edward gave them all a quick tuning note and Jasper had to concentrate for a moment to accomplish the task.

"Okay, so here's what I'm thinking," Edward said. "We've got a fairly short set, and hopefully we won't be late tonight." He outlined the three pieces and after some discussion of the order and who was going to take some solo space, they got started. Jasper felt slightly guilty that he'd helped the rest of the group pressure Edward into taking a very small piano solo on their opener, but he figured in the long run it would be more beneficial than harmful. Edward had seemed to only put up a token protest, anyhow.

The rehearsal lasted for just over an hour, and Jasper could see that Edward was pleased with how things went. Everyone helped break down and put the equipment away, and Edward and Jasper were the last ones out after they shut off the lights and locked everything down for the night.

Monday and Tuesday went pretty normally. After his office hours and dinner on Monday, Jasper had his last additional session with Dr. Jones; on Thursday he'd resume a once per week schedule. The three weeks of extra meetings had helped Jasper to put a lot of things into perspective, and though he and Dr. Jones had agreed that Jasper would always carry the burden of some guilt over what happened, he had accepted that others viewed his actions as heroic and that he, specifically, had done nothing wrong. He spent the evening alone when he returned to campus, though, as had become their regular weeknight practice, he chatted with Edward and Bella as they worked.

Tuesday was unremarkable. He gave two exams and listened to presentations in one class, coached the swim team, and met with the combo for a rehearsal. Sleep started to come easier again, with Edward's music on his iPod, and his busy schedule helping to slow down his thoughts and body.

After breakfast on Wednesday, he and Bella walked together to their office, arm in arm as they usually did. The three morning classes passed quickly, and Jasper dashed out to pick up their lunches before settling at his desk to review a lesson for later that afternoon.

"Hey, Jazzy, what's the date?" Bella asked from across the office, her head buried in an expandable file.

"Uhm-" he shifted his mouse to hover over the time on his computer. "Wednesday the 31st," he replied when the box popped up.

Jasper heard a bang. "Ow, shit," Bella cursed. "What?"

"The 31st. You okay?" he asked, peering over the top of his computer. She was rubbing her knee, her eyes showing a mix of physical pain, confusion, and maybe a bit of fear. "Bells?"

She grabbed her little datebook from the corner of her desk and started flipping back pages, muttering quietly.

"Honey, you're startin' to worry me over here," he half-joked.

Bella sighed and closed her book with a shake of her head. "Never mind," she said with a soft smile. "I'm sure it's nothing," she said, half to herself.

Jasper wasn't convinced. "If you decide it is something…" he trailed off.

"I know." She turned back to her file folder, and Jasper went back to work on the lesson he was reviewing until their lunch break was over.

As the afternoon sped on, Jasper forgot about the odd conversation as he focused on classes, and then had his office hour with students waiting to speak to him.

Bella seemed distracted at dinner, but Jasper had chalked it up to her impending therapy session with Dr. Stevens. Jasper let her be; after she'd broken down they'd talked and Jasper and Edward both were trying to be better about not hounding her to talk. She and Alice seemed to have a quiet exchange, though, and after dinner, Bella had excused herself to therapy and promised to see Jasper and Edward the next day.

Thursday morning, Bella didn't show up for breakfast. Jasper missed her, but he and Edward dismissed her absence, thinking she was working on something or had slept in and would grab something in her room for breakfast. But when Jasper got to his office, he found a strange young woman at Bella's desk, obviously looking for something.

"Can I help you?" Jasper asked, confused.

"Hi, I'm Claire. I'm subbing for Dr. Swan today," she said, introducing herself.

Jasper felt his brow furrow. "Really?"

"Mm-hm," she hummed brightly. "Do you know where I could find her lesson plans?"

Jasper crossed the room and pulled a file folder from under a pile of papers on Bella's desk. "How long will she be out?"

Claire looked up at him with a thankful smile as she took the folder. "Just today, Mrs. Cullen said. Thank you."

Jasper nodded and crossed back to his desk. He pulled his phone from his bag and sent Bella a text, asking if she was okay. She'd been fine at dinner the night before, though he hadn't seen her after her therapy appointment. His message hadn't been answered by the time he left for class. On the break between classes he tried again, then texted Edward. Edward replied that he hadn't heard anything either, and Jasper said he'd check on her at lunch. Edward had a meeting.

Jasper made it through the next two classes somewhat distracted, but his students were good at pulling him back into the classroom and shifting his focus back on them. When the last period before lunch was over, Jasper had to restrain himself from flying out the door with his students and instead, clear the board and turn out the lights. He took the stairs two at a time up to his office for his bag (and keys), then quickly made his way to Bella's.

"Bella, sweetheart?" He called as he knocked on her door. When there was no answer he tried the knob and found it unlocked. "Bella?" he called softly again as he stepped into her room. It was dark inside, the blinds and heavy curtains pulled over the windows, and he could just make out a vague shape huddled under blankets in the middle of the bed.

Jasper quietly set his bag on the table and crossed to the bed, perching lightly on the edge. "Bella?" he asked quietly, reaching out toward the lump. He could feel her shaking beneath the covers, and once he was close enough, hear the soft whimpers that told him she was crying. "Oh, honey," he sighed softly, gently running his hand over her body. He shifted slightly so he could pull his phone from his pocket. "What's wrong?"

"Migraine," she whimpered, her voice small and distant under the blankets.

"What can I do to help?" he asked softly. "Did you take anything, or call Carlisle?"

"Maxed out migraine drugs. Not working," she murmured. "Left a message at the clinic."

"Let me get you some water, okay? Do you want anything else?" Jasper ran his fingers lightly through her hair.

"Ughn. No," she said firmly.

"Okay." Jasper brushed his lips over the crown of her head and rose smoothly, going into the shared kitchen space where he found a half-full bottle of water. He grabbed it and returned to his girlfriend's side.

Bella hadn't moved, and Jasper was reminded of that day before New Year's when everything had started, only Bella seemed to be in much more pain. "Here, Bells," he said softly when he sat again. She turned and struggled to sit up, groaning quietly. Jasper wrapped his free arm around her waist and tugged her against his shoulder and she just melted against him. He handed her the water bottle, and took the bottle back when she was finished.

She sighed softly and rested her head on his shoulder with a whimper. Her face was pale and tear stained, her eyes red-rimmed and dull. Jasper snaked his hand under her light top and lightly ran it up and down her back. He sat with her quietly, just holding her until she sighed softly. "Thanks, Jazzy," she breathed.

"You're welcome, sweetheart." He glanced at his watch. "Are you going to be alright? I'll text Edward and see what his afternoon looks like, if you want some company."

"Yeah, I'm just going to curl up with my heating pad and wait for Carlisle," she said softly. "Hopefully I'll sleep."

Jasper smiled and nodded before kissing her softly. Her statement about the heating pad clicked the last few pieces into place; no wonder she was miserable. "Feel better, then. Call me if you need anything."

Bella's smile was tight but sincere and she let him help her get situated again. Before he left to grab a quick lunch before class, he grabbed a full bottle of water from her fridge and left it next to the bed.

True to his word, Jasper texted Edward, who agreed to check in on her between lessons and rehearsal, then he called Carlisle on his mobile instead of the clinic phone. Carlisle had gotten Bella's message but hadn't been able to get out of the clinic due to previous appointments. Jasper relaxed fractionally after he ended the call, and ordered a sandwich to go, which he ate as he strode back across campus to the building where his classes were held.

Jasper didn't want to make Bella feel smothered, or disturb her if she was managing to sleep, so he worked through his prep period instead of going to see her, which helped him focus for his last two classes of the day.

After class he was off to the swim team practice, and after a quick shower to rinse off the chlorine (he hadn't intended to get in the pool, but his students had had other ideas), he trotted off to meet the others at dinner. Edward and Bella were absent, which Jasper half expected, but he ate with the others as they caught up. Jasper picked up a few more things from the dining hall and packed them into his bag for later in the evening; after therapy, he had history club, then a final rehearsal for the concert Friday night.

Jasper made it to Dr. Jones' office with only a couple of minutes to spare. Riley greeted him enthusiastically as always. The session went well, and Jasper left after saying he'd see her the next Thursday.

Back on campus, Jasper jogged to his room for the materials for the history club and his guitar, and made quick work of the apple he'd tossed into his messenger bag as he walked. He dropped the core into a trash can on his way into the history club meeting.

Thankfully, the meeting went quickly (and some kind soul had thought to bring coffee), and Jasper was on his way to rehearsal on time an hour later. He smiled softly as he entered the room, seeing Edward for the first time that day since breakfast. Edward returned the smile and rose from the piano bench to meet him.

"Hey," Jasper said softly, aware of the others in the room. He gave Edward a half hug.

"Hi. You look tired," Edward observed.

Jasper shrugged. "It's been a long day."

Edward nodded. "Yeah."

"How's Bella?" Jasper asked, setting his case down on a chair before swiping his hand through his hair, pushing it out of his face. He really needed to see about that haircut.

"She was sleeping when I left," Edward said. "Dad got her hooked up on some oxygen and she just curled up with me and slept. I checked on her again after rehearsal and she was still out so I sat with her."

Jasper nodded, but was confused, but trusted that Carlisle knew what he was doing. Giving Bella oxygen for a headache didn't make much sense to Jasper, but then, what did he know about medicine? "Okay."

Edward smiled softly and took Jasper's hand. "We'll go check on her when we're done."

Jasper grinned. "Thanks, babe."

Edward nudged him gently with his shoulder. "Get set up," he ordered and turned to move back to the piano.

Jasper went to the closet for the amp and got himself organized while the others arrived. Rehearsal was productive and only took about an hour to run the three pieces twice and work out any remaining kinks. Jasper and Edward took a few minutes to finish cleaning things up and they left the building hand in hand after shutting off the lights and locking up.

It was a detour for Jasper to swing by Bella's room on his way back to his own, but he went with Edward without a second thought. They found her still sleeping peacefully, something in her nose and a soft hissing noise in the room over the sound of her breathing. Jasper didn't want to wake her, so he kissed her softly, retrieved another bottle of water from the kitchenette to leave by her bed, and he and Edward made sure the door was locked when they left, after saying goodnight to Alice.

Jasper walked Edward home, and they shared a long sweet kiss just behind Edward's door before Jasper reluctantly pulled away. He wanted nothing more than to curl up with Edward for the night, but it was already late, and he still had work to do for one of his classes Friday morning.

When he got back to his room, Jasper grabbed himself a bottle of water before he changed into a t-shirt and pajama pants and lounged on his bed with his laptop to finish writing the exam he intended to give. It took an hour, and his eyes were heavy by the time he finally finished and sent it to the printer in the humanities building, where he'd pick it up and make copies in the morning. He fell asleep quickly to the quiet sounds of Edward's piano music after resetting his alarm clock to allow him to skip the gym.

Jasper woke later than he was used to when his alarm went off, but for the first time in several weeks, he'd slept solidly through the night. He stretched as he reached overhead to turn of the bleeping alarm, and pulled himself from bed after a moment to shower and face his day.

Throughout the week, Jasper and Bella had watched as Edward's anxiety slowly increased day by day. They both did what they could to try to calm him down some, but it was apparent that it wasn't quite enough. Edward was quiet at breakfast, and Jasper let him be, leaving Bella to try to coax more than a few syllables out of him at a time. Jasper didn't see Edward at lunch, and their plan was to get something to eat after the concert. So at 5:15, when his last class was over, Jasper packed up his things for the weekend and kissed Bella softly before returning his room to get cleaned up and into the agreed upon attire for the evening.

The concert was scheduled to start at seven, and by the time Jasper had grabbed a snack, showered, shaved, and dressed, it was a quarter after six. He dressed in a light blue (French Blue, Alice had said) button down with his black slacks, and dug out a rarely used pair of black dress shoes from his closet. He shrugged into his trench coat and grabbed his guitar on the way out.

The auditorium was beginning to fill, though the concert wouldn't start for another half hour by the time Jasper got there. He saw Carlisle and Esme sitting with Rosalie, Emmett, Alice, and Bella as he walked through the hall to get to the stage and the backstage area. He found a sea of chaos awaiting him, and he easily navigated his way through students to get to a green room where he could leave his stuff. Jasper left his guitar propped up in a corner where it was out of the way and went in search of Edward or other members of their combo.

Jasper found Dr. Brightling talking with her group in a small room, and he ran into Jae and her husband when he popped his head outside, figuring Edward might have resorted to his old vice to get a quick fix of nicotine to calm himself down. But the patio area outside the hall was devoid of an anxious reddish haired piano player, so Jasper returned inside with a shrug, deciding Edward was busy somewhere and that if he needed Jasper, he'd find him.

He made his way back to the green room and greeted Dave, who was sitting on a tall stool, idly plucking at the strings on an upright bass. Jasper heard voices in the passageway and followed them, to hear Edward's voice from the speakers welcoming the audience to the concert and introducing Dr. Brightling and the Junior level Jazz Band.

Edward and Dr. Brightling passed each other as she took the stage and Edward left it, stopping in the wings just out of sight of the audience so he could see the band.

"Hey, baby," Jasper greeted Edward quietly as he stepped up beside him. His voice was drowned out by the very loud sound of the junior band on stage.

The smile he got in return was a bit shaky. Jasper took Edward's hand and noticed that it was shaking slightly, and his skin felt cool and clammy. Jasper squeezed his hand. "You okay?"

Edward nodded tightly, not looking at Jasper.

Jasper moved, tugging lightly on Edward's hand as he moved to stand in front of him. Edward's eyes were wide and he was deathly pale, a light sheen of sweat on his forehead. His breathing seemed shallow and fast to Jasper.

"Edward?" Jasper tried to get his attention, and it took a minute to Edward's eyes to track over to him. He could feel the other man's pulse race under the fingers curled around Edward's wrist. "What's wrong?"

"I can't breathe," Edward gasped out finally. His green eyes shone with panic.

The sounds of the band on stage ceased and applause filled the hall.

"Come sit down," Jasper said, fighting to stay calm as he led Edward to a piano bench against the wall back stage. He sat down next to Edward and racked his thoughts for some way to help him calm down. Edward was clearly having a panic attack, and Jasper didn't know what to do. "Breathe, baby," Jasper urged, rubbing Edward's back through the two layers of shirts he was wearing, applying a bit of pressure so that Edward was leaning forward, trying to get Edward's head down between his knees. He got that Edward was terrified; it was his first public performance in three years. "Joel?" Jasper called identifying a student in the loose knot of them hanging around back stage. "Can you find Doctor Cullen and Doctor Swan, please? _Doctor_ Doctor Cullen," he clarified, since Emmett was in one of his phases of making everyone call him by his title.

"Sure, Dr. Whitlock," Joel squeaked and ran off. Students were gathered back stage to watch the other group, and they had shifted their attention over to Jasper and Edward, curious.

"Are you sure you want to do this?" Jasper asked quietly. "We can get one of the students to fill in if you're not ready."

"No," Edward gasped. "I want to play. I _need_ to do this."

"Edward," Jasper admonished softly.

Carlisle and Bella came around the corner together, looking worried.

"I think he's having a panic attack," Jasper explained as Carlisle knelt in front of Edward. Bella squeezed onto the bench at Edward's side.

"Edward, I need you to focus on your breathing," Carlisle guided gently. "Jasper?"

Jasper shifted his attention to Carlisle. The doctor lifted one of Edward's trembling hands and placed it on Jasper's chest, at his sternum. Jasper covered it with his own. "Match your breathing to Jasper's," Carlisle instructed softly.

Jasper fought to keep his breathing even, and his emotions on the calm, concerned side. Edward's panic and Bella's worry were making it difficult, but he managed to take slow steady breaths, keeping his eyes locked on Edward's panicked green.

Carlisle's fingers curled around Edward's other wrist, taking his pulse. It was a moment before he spoke up. "Does anyone have a paper bag? Emmett's gone to get my bag from the office."

There were murmurs from those who gathered in a loose circle some distance away, but no one came forward. The sounds of the band on stage stopped again, and Jasper could hear the indistinct murmur of Dr. Brightling's voice before they started up once again.

Edward was still hyperventilating and Jasper locked eyes with Bella over his shoulder. The hand that wasn't holding Edward's to his chest reached around for hers, and she smiled softly as she took it, but it didn't reach her eyes.

Emmett arrived a moment later, panting as he dropped Carlisle's black bag at Edward's feet. Carlisle quickly pulled out a paper sack and instructed Edward to breathe into it. They waited another few minutes before he spoke again. "I'm going to give you something to help you calm down, Edward."

"No!" Edward gasped, lowering the bag from his face. "Need to do this."

"Edward," Bella said, a pleading edge to her voice. "Sweetheart, please..."

"No." He said again.

"Alright, Edward," Carlisle agreed on a quiet sigh. "Keep breathing," he advised his son.

Jasper kept his eyes locked on Edward's and lifted the bag gently back toward Edward's face. "It's going to be fine," Jasper assured Edward softly. "Who is in your student combo?" he asked.

"Quil, Seth, Liam, and Danny," Edward said, his voice muted by the bag he was still breathing into.

Jasper glanced around the students who were loosely gathered around trying to look like they weren't watching. He didn't recognize any faces, so he just called out. "Quil?"

"Yo." A dark skinned youth stepped forward.

"Think you guys can fill about fifteen minutes?" Jasper asked. He knew the smaller group hadn't been scheduled for the event, but they wouldn't be able to keep the audience hanging between groups.

"Sure, Dr. Whitlock," Quil answered. He turned away and Jasper shifted his attention back to Edward.

Though he'd been working toward it, it was only in the past several minutes that Edward finally seemed to have brought his breathing back under control. His color had come back and he looked less tense overall, though Jasper could still see the fear lurking in his eyes. As his breathing slowed, Edward lowered the paper bag again and sat back against Bella slightly.

The junior band came off stage and Dr. Brightling cast a curious glance at Jasper, but quickly shepherded her students to the room where they'd stored their cases while Edward's combo announced themselves and the slight change in plans and began their first tune.

"Good, Edward," Carlisle said softly. "Now listen to me," he continued with an edge to his voice that let Jasper know he was hearing Dr. Cullen as much as Edward's father. "If you're sure you want to do this, you should let me give you the Ativan. It won't make you sleepy, but it'll keep you from going into another panic attack when you hit the stage. No, son, listen," he cut Edward off before he could interrupt. "There's no shame in this," he said gently.

"Sometimes we need a little chemical help, Edward," Bella said quietly, a sad smile on her face as she spoke a truth she'd recently learned and took Edward's free hand. "I know that you're scared because you haven't played for an audience since the accident. But you can do this, if you really want to. We can't always control what we feel, though. Let Dad give you the support, sweetheart," she said softly, a pleading edge to her voice. "We're going to love you no matter what," she whispered, just loudly enough for Jasper to hear.

Edward nodded, and Jasper felt the small knot of his own anxiety ease as Bella sighed softly. Despite their surroundings, she kissed Edward lightly as Carlisle went into his bag for what he needed.

"Take off your shirt, Edward," Carlisle directed. Jasper felt Edward squeeze his wrist before his warm fingers slipped away, and he quickly unbuttoned his blue shirt and shrugged it off without untucking it. Carlisle lifted the shoulder of the thin t-shirt Edward was wearing underneath and quickly ran an alcohol wipe over the surface. Jasper turned his head away when Carlisle approached Edward with the needle.

Carlisle and Edward's soft laughter rang in his ears and Jasper ducked his head slightly. He'd never really been able to handle watching anyone get a shot. He looked up at the feel of fingers at the back of his neck and met Bella's sympathetic gaze. Jasper gave her a soft smile, which she returned as Carlisle sat back, placing a cap over the needle, which he placed back in his bag. "All done," Carlisle declared. "You should be okay when you're ready to go on," he advised Edward softly. "If you don't come over tonight, please call me later, and let me know how you're doing," he requested.

Edward nodded, and Carlisle patted his arm before he rose. He gathered his bag and made his way back down the wing to the door to the auditorium.

"Feeling better?" Jasper asked quietly after a moment.

Edward took a deep breath and let it out slowly. He nodded. "Yeah. Sorry for freaking out," he said under the sounds of the combo on stage.

Jasper simply took Edward's hand and gave it a light squeeze. They could, and would, if Jasper had his way, talk about it later. Applause sounded from the auditorium as the combo finished a tune. Jasper guessed they'd play one more.

"Are you going to be okay?" Bella asked quietly.

"I think so," Edward responded, turning toward her and resting his head lightly on her shoulder. "Thanks, love."

She smiled softly and quickly kissed his cheek. "I'm going to go back to my seat, unless you want me to stay…?"

Jasper deferred to Edward. "Go on," he said. "You'll enjoy it more from out there," Edward said. Jasper nodded when she looked to him for confirmation. He'd make sure that Edward was alright.

After a moment she rose from the piano bench where they'd perched and smoothed down her skirt. "I love you," she said quietly under the applause for the combo on stage before she ducked through the crowd of students and made her way back into the main auditorium.

"Are you ready?" Jasper asked Edward quietly.

He nodded hesitantly. "Yeah. Let's do this."

"I'm going to be right there with you," Jasper said, quietly encouraging. "You don't even have to look at anyone but me," he reminded his lover.

Edward nodded again, and though he was wide eyed and slightly unsteady when he rose, using his cane for support, his breathing and color stayed even. Jasper kissed him quickly, feeling his ears heat up at the snickers from the students also waiting in the wings. "I'll be right back," he assured Edward, and strode off toward the green room for his guitar.

"Hey, man, is Edward alright?" Dave asked wrestling his bass through the door as Jasper arrived.

"Yeah," Jasper answered. "Just a bit of an anxiety attack," he said as he pulled his guitar from the bag.

"He hasn't played in awhile, has he?"

Jasper shook his head and followed the bassist out the door. "Nope."

Dave whistled softly and they joined the others in the wings as the combo came off stage. Jasper sidled up to Edward again and took his hand. "Last chance to back out, babe."

Edward shook his head and took a deep breath, letting it out slowly. "I'm good. Let's do this." He nodded at a female students who smiled and went out on stage before them.

"Ladies and Gentlemen, the Forks Academy Faculty Jazz Combo," she announced. Jasper felt Edward give his hand a squeeze and then they were making their way out on stage to applause.

The stage was pre-set, and all they had to do was quickly plug in, arrange music stands and get a quick tuning chord from Edward and they were off. Jasper kept half an eye on Edward throughout the performance, and though he could see that he was still anxious about the performance, the shot that Carlisle had given him was doing its job.

It took a few minutes for Jasper to see the tense lines of Edward's shoulders relax slightly, but as they got deeper into the first song, the anxiety seemed to flow out of his partner. The three tune set went quickly, and seemed to be well received, and Jasper left the stage smiling, Edward just ahead of him. When they cleared the wings, Edward turned to Jasper, and the smile that lit his face made Jasper think that there wasn't a possible thing that could ever go wrong again.

"I'm so proud of you, baby," Jasper said quietly as he embraced Edward, again in front of snickering students. He felt Edward's lips against his neck before the slightly shorter man pulled away.

"I have to get the stage reset. Are you going to sit with the others?"

Jasper nodded. "Right after I get this put away," he said, gesturing with his guitar. "I'll meet you back here when it's over?"

"Please. I need ice cream," Edward confessed.

Jasper laughed. "We'll grab Bells and go to the diner," he promised.

"Okay," Edward agreed.

Jasper flashed him a quick smile and made his way through the backstage area to the green room. He put his guitar back in the bag and left it propped up against the wall, once more weaving his way through students to get to the door to access the auditorium. When he stepped through, he found the lights at about half, and easily located the rest of the family.

Bella had reserved him a seat, and he made his way through the row to the middle where the vacant seat was next to her. "Hi, sweetheart," he said quietly as he dropped in next to her.

"Hi. You guys were great. How's Edward?" she asked, taking his hand over the armrest between their chairs.

"Pretty damned proud of himself," Jasper answered, smiling at the soft laugh that earned him. "He's okay. I think it took him a few minutes to get settled in, but he's okay."

"Good," Bella said, running her thumb lightly over Jasper's knuckles, the applause of the audience at the appearance of the big band cutting off further conversation.

Edward's big band played a six tune set, featuring nearly everyone in the band on a solo at some point. The audience seemed to get into the spirit of things and cheered loudly as Edward announced some of the band's accomplishments throughout the year. Though they'd be playing at graduation in June, the concert was kind of the last big thing for the group (besides the spring break trip), and Edward took the opportunity to acknowledge some of the group's members, especially the seniors.

At the end of the concert, Jasper excused himself from the rest of the family to retrieve Edward and his guitar. Edward proved to be more difficult, being surrounded by students and some of their families who had come in for the concert and to retrieve their children for the Spring Break holiday that un-officially began when classes had ended Friday night. Jasper eventually caught his eye and nodded back toward the auditorium. Edward nodded with a smile and Jasper wove his way through the crowd to rejoin Bella.

Carlisle and Esme had already left for the evening, though they'd told Bella that they were more than welcome to sleep at the house before they took off (and Carlisle still wanted to talk to Edward). Emmett, Rosalie, and Alice were sitting with Bella, and he joined them, his guitar in an empty seat next to him as they waited for Edward to be done.

They sat and chatted for about twenty minutes before Edward emerged from backstage. Before they left for the diner, Edward, Jasper, and Bella said they'd meet the others there, and they hurried back to their rooms to pack overnight bags. Jasper threw what he would need for two days into his duffel bag, leaving his guitar laying across his bed, and jogged back across campus to meet Bella and Edward at Edward's car.

Bella and Edward had beaten him there, and he paused and watched with a soft smile as they shared a passionate kiss up against the side of the Volvo. Edward had Bella's face cradled tenderly in his hands, and Bella had one hand curled around the back of his neck. The trunk was open and Jasper set his bag inside, closing it with a quiet 'schnick' and walked over to where they were standing. He brushed his hand along Bella's shoulder and kissed the back of her neck lightly under her hair, then leaned past her to place a soft kiss on Edward's neck as Bella broke their kiss and tucked her head under Edward's chin, moving her arms to embrace him around his waist.

Jasper wrapped his arms around them both for a brief moment, kissing the top of Bella's head. He gave them a squeeze and stepped away. Bella's hand trailed against his arm as he moved. Jasper caught her hand and gave it a squeeze before he moved around to the passenger side of the car and slipped into the back seat to let them continue their quiet moment.

He'd just closed his eyes and tipped his head back against the seat when he heard the other doors open and close.

"You didn't have to leave, sweetheart," Bella said.

Jasper opened his eyes and smiled at her where she was peeking over her shoulder and the back of her seat. "You looked like you were having a moment, and I didn't want to intrude," he said casually with a shrug.

"You weren't intruding," Edward promised as Bella turned back around to fasten her seatbelt as he started the car.

Jasper caught Edward's gaze in the rearview mirror. There was concern and a question lurking in Edward's green eyes, and Jasper just smiled reassuringly. Edward nodded and turned his attention to the road.

"There's nothing to intrude on," Bella continued. "It's the three of us, remember?"

"I know," Jasper answered, reaching out to finger the tendril of hair that had slipped over Bella's seat. "But you two looked like you were sharing something and I wanted you to have that." He wasn't sure what he was trying to say was coming out right. He wasn't jealous at seeing them together (quite the opposite, actually), but knew that sometimes they couldn't be the three of them, and he wanted Bella and Edward both to feel like they could be together without upsetting him, or that any pairing among them could happen if the third was away. But like other things in their life recently, they hadn't had much of a chance to discuss anything.

"Okay," Bella conceded. "But you should tell us if you feel left out."

"I will." Jasper tugged on her hair lightly. "Thanks, darlin'."

The drive to the diner wasn't that long, and Jasper helped Bella from the car when they arrived. Emmett, Rosalie, and Alice were already seated in a booth and they joined them, squishing in with a laugh. Edward ordered his ice cream in milkshake form, to go with a burger. Jasper ordered fried chicken, and Bella ordered chicken strips off the kids' menu, to general amusement.

The ate and caught up on a few things over their meal since it seemed to Jasper that they were all so busy with professional things and their own relationships that they were spending less time together as a group. Part of the conversation ended up on comparing notes about a few students they had in common.

It was late when they finally broke up, Bella getting hugs from Rosalie and Alice before they returned to campus and Jasper, Edward, and Bella continued on to the Cullens'.

The house was quiet when they entered, and Edward locked the door behind them.

"Oh, hi kids," Esme said, emerging from the kitchen with two mugs. She was dressed down for the night in a pair of cropped yoga pants and a t-shirt, her hair down and loose around her shoulders.

"Hi, mom," Edward answered, moving to give her a light hug and kissing her cheek. "Is dad still up?"

"Mm-hm," she hummed with a smile. "I'll tell him you're here." She disappeared down the hall with the mugs and Jasper collected the three bags and took them upstairs. When he came back down, Edward and Bella were snuggled up together on the couch, Bella tucked against Edward's chest, her knees pulled up to her own, Edward's arms around her as they scrunched into the corner.

Jasper accepted Bella's silent invitation to join them; she patted the space next to her on the couch. He stretched out, resting his head against her knees while he laid on his back, facing the ceiling. One of her small hands carded lightly through his hair and he sighed softly, content, smiling at his lovers' chuckles. His eyes drifted closed, and so he didn't see Esme and Carlisle re-enter the room until a soft throat-clearing prompted him to open his eyes.

Jasper didn't move, though. Carlisle was dressed more casually than Jasper had ever seen him, in a thin undershirt and pajama pants, and he and Esme settled into one of the large lounge chairs together. They both wore expressions that were somewhere between amused and concerned.

"How are you feeling, Edward?" Carlisle asked as he kicked his heels up to rest on the coffee table, Esme settled more or less next to him in the chair.

"I'm okay," Edward answered. Jasper felt him shift through the movement of Bella's knees. "I'm sorry for freaking out backstage," he continued. "I honestly hadn't thought about what it would feel like to be ready to walk back out onstage, and I didn't expect to have a physical reaction."

Jasper stretched an arm over his head to rest on Edward's thigh, behind Bella.

"We all probably should have been a bit more prepared," Carlisle responded. "I don't think any of us really thought about how you might react, since we know you still play. For my part, I hadn't really thought about the difference, but then you know me, and that I lack any desire to perform for anyone," he teased lightly.

Esme kissed Carlisle's cheek. "I'm glad you're okay, sweetheart, but you really don't need to apologize. It's not your fault."

"But-" Edward started to protest.

"She's right, Edward," Jasper added. "There's nothing to apologize for. You panicked, which is completely understandable." He pulled himself up so he could look at Edward as he spoke instead of staring at the ceiling. "It's done," he said softly with a smile. "And you went on stage and performed anyway, and I'm so fucking proud of you for that," he said more quietly, feeling his ears heat up at Esme's soft chastisement for his language. He leaned around Bella and kissed Edward softly, though he trailed his fingers up Bella's forearm. "Some things we can't control, right?"

Edward nodded.

"So don't worry about," Bella finished. "Though maybe…" she trailed off.

"What, sweetheart?" Edward prompted.

"Maybe once was enough?" she asked, turning to face Edward. Jasper caught a glimpse of her wide eyes, concern written on her features. "Do you need to play tomorrow night, too?"

It was quiet for a moment. "She's got a point, babe," Jasper agreed. "Why push it? You took a big step tonight, and I have to tell you that even though I understand it, I wouldn't mind if I never had to see you have a panic attack like that again."

Edward huffed a laugh, but Jasper could see he was considering it. They were only going to play a small duet for piano and guitar between the choir and bands, but Jasper wouldn't mind if it got put off for another time. "Yeah, maybe," he said finally. "We can talk about it tomorrow?" he asked, reaching for Jasper's hand and twining their fingers together.

Jasper nodded. "Sure."

"Now," Esme said, drawing their attention back to where she and Carlisle sat, a slight smile on her face. "Is there something else you need to tell us?"

"Like what?" Edward asked, a smile in his voice, then he grunted quietly as Bella elbowed him in the stomach for teasing, Jasper assumed.

"What you kids choose to do with your private life is up to you," Carlisle said. "As your father, it makes me happy to know that you've found people to love you and accept you, because that's what we fathers hope for our children. What happens in this house stays here," he said. "But as happy as I am, I just want to caution you. You work in a field where your private lives could easily force the Board to revoke your positions with the school, which could make it difficult to become employed anywhere else as a teacher. I'm sorry for dwelling on the practicalities," he said, wrapping an arm around Esme's shoulders, which told Jasper that they had known for long enough to have had discussions about it. "I know you kids are smart enough to have considered all of this, so just humor the old man, okay?" he teased lightly. "I'd hate for you to lose the happiness you've found with each other due to an indiscretion."

Edward nodded. "I figured you knew more than you let on," he said quietly. "Yes, the three of us are together, since just after Valentine's day," he admitted.

Esme's smile threatened to split her face in two. "Ha!" she declared. Carlisle looked disappointed. "You owe me $50."

Bella giggled. "You bet on us?"

"I should know better than to go against Esme when it comes to these things," Carlisle said with a sigh, but he kissed Esme's temple. "We truly are happy for you," he said again. "And not to sound like a broken record, but please be careful, at least until you have tenure enough that the school will face serious scrutiny if they let you go."

Jasper nodded his agreement. What Carlisle had said wasn't anything Jasper and Edward at least hadn't already talked about, though he knew that when they came back from Spring break they'd need to talk a bit more about how their public life was going to go, especially in such a small community.

Esme slid from Carlisle's lap and he rose behind her. "You are welcome here any time, I hope you know that," she said as she took Carlisle's hand. "Carlisle and I met in college, so I understand how hard it can be to find privacy or a bed big enough."

"Mom!" Edward scolded, shocked, to everyone else's laughter.

Esme laughed as she crossed to them. "I'm happy for you," Esme said softly as she bent to kiss Bella, then Jasper, on the forehead. "Goodnight."

Edward let out a slow breath as his parents disappeared back down the hall toward their bedroom.

"See? Wasn't so bad," Bella pointed out.

"I know," Edward said, sounding relieved. They stayed on the couch for awhile longer until Bella smothered a huge yawn with the back of her hand.

Once upstairs, they changed for bed and jostled each other at the sink as they washed faces and brushed teeth. Bella had dressed in overlarge sweats and one of Edward's t-shirts that she swam in, which reminded Jasper of Wednesday. Though it wasn't unusual for her, in the last several weeks, since Jasper's birthday, she'd gotten more comfortable in sleeping in less with both of them, and the choice in clothes was enough to Jasper to deduce that she probably wasn't going to want to do much with them that night.

But she pinched Edward and Jasper's backsides as she passed them on her way back into the bedroom. Jasper stalked after her, loud enough she'd hear him coming, and scooped her up from behind. She squealed softly, as he threw her lightly over her shoulder and smacked her ass. Edward's laughter carried from the bathroom over the sound of running water which shut off as Jasper deposited Bella onto the mattress.

Bella looked up at Jasper, her brown eyes wide and sparkling as he bent over her and kissed her deeply, his weight resting on his hands on either side of her hips. Behind him, Edward shut off the lights and left his cane resting against the bureau before he joined them, climbing onto the bed to scoot up behind Bella.

Jasper shifted his weight so he could hoist himself onto the bed, kneeling over Bella. She returned his kiss, tilting her head to one side as Edward pressed his lips to the back of her neck. His weight off his hands, Jasper skimmed his fingers over her cotton-clad belly, stopping before his fingertips brushed her breasts, as her hands circled his wrists.

"Not tonight," Bella said softly, kissing his jaw. "I feel…" she trailed off, as if searching for a word. "But don't let me stop the two of you," she said, her voice lighter.

Edward hummed his understanding behind her, kissing her neck and Jasper nodded, pressing his lips to her forehead. "You're beautiful and sexy and I love you," Jasper whispered. He kissed her again. "Even when you're grumpy and bloated and don't want to have anything to do with us." Bella laughed and smacked him softly. They shifted around so she was cradled between the two of them.

Edward seemed to be pretty close to wanting to sleep himself, so once they'd settled, Jasper just wrapped his arms and legs over and around them both. Jasper was the last to drift to sleep as it took awhile for his thoughts to calm down after he'd turned to press his chest to Bella's back and buried his nose in her hair.

Saturday morning, Bella left Jasper and Edward with soft kisses before she went to her therapy appointment. After she'd gone, Jasper and Edward migrated closer to each other in bed and dozed back off until Esme woke them for brunch after Bella had returned.

They spent the day hanging out, and Jasper and Edward took a few moments alone to discuss their plans for the concert. They decided that maybe it would be for the best to skip the duet, neither of them looking forward to a repeat of the anxiety Edward had faced the previous evening, and knowing that since the hurdle of public performance had been leapt, the future was wide open for other opportunities down the line.

The concert on Saturday night went well. Edward sat with the family during the first half of the program, while the choirs performed, then disappeared backstage at intermission. The younger concert band did a good job with their small set, and Edward's two bands were impressive to Jasper.

After the concert they again waited for Edward to be finished, and then caravanned back to the Cullen house their usual Saturday night family dinner.

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**I'll put a couple of pictures up on the blog (reallifebandgeek . blogspot . com), which I know hasn't been updated in forever.**

**Also, fandom is gearing back up for Fandom Gives Back again. There's some info on my profile page. :D**

**I feel like I had something else to go here, but I can't remember what it was. Oh well. :)**


	52. Chapter 51: Easter

**thank you as always to Naelany and wishingforlove.**

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Bella woke up early Sunday morning and extricated herself from the vice-like grips of her lovers, dressed in yoga pants and a long-sleeved t-shirt, and made her way downstairs to see if Esme needed any help with breakfast or getting dinner started, or putting things together for the kids at the hospital.

"Good morning, Esme," Bella greeted her as she entered the kitchen.

"Hi, Bella. Sleep well?" Esme asked with a grin.

"Yes. Can I help with anything?" Bella reached for a mug and the hot water.

Esme laughed at Bella's non-response. "I've got everything handled for now, but thank you, dear."

Bella dropped a tea bag into the hot water and kissed Esme on the cheek, taking a seat at the counter. She watched Esme move effortlessly around the space and listened to the sounds of the rest of the house coming awake with alarm clocks. They were off to an early church service before they went to the hospital to visit with the kids.

"Oh, there is something you can do, Bella. Would you mind setting the table?"

"Not at all," Bella said, sliding from her stool. She collected enough plates and silverware and moved into the dining room, humming idly to herself as she set the table, smiling at the Easter themed place-mats Esme had set out, and a bright centerpiece of tulips. On her return trip she found that Esme had set out coffee cups and glasses, which Bella gathered and carried out.

"Mornin', darlin'," Jasper said, coming around the corner in a pair of jeans and a rumpled t-shirt, his hair a bit of a mess. He stooped to kiss her softly.

"Good morning. Where's Edward?" she asked as he took the jug of orange juice from her hands and carried it into the dining room.

"Showering. He thought he'd get a jump on the rest of us," Jasper explained. "Are you ready to get away for a bit?" he asked, wrapping his arms around her waist and tugging her back aginst his chest. He swayed idly.

"You mean the L.A. trip?" she asked.

"Yeah. Looking forward to it?" he asked.

"Mm-hm," she hummed. "It'll be nice to get away. I usually work through spring break, writing or grading and just hiding out here," she said with a wave, indicating the house. "So yeah, I'm looking forward to it. You?"

"Yeah," Jasper answered. "I haven't been there before, and I can get behind the idea of getting to see you and Edward every day, even if I'm going to have to give you up to the girls every night," he said, kissing her cheek lightly from behind.

"I'm sure we can find some time alone together," she assured him, turning in his arms so they were facing each other.

"Sure hope so, darlin'," Jasper said before kissing her again.

"Hey now, hands off my baby sister," Emmett boomed as he came into the dining room with a huge pan full of scrambled eggs.

Jasper flipped him the bird. Emmett laughed and Esme scolded Jasper. "Sorry, Esme," Jasper said, sounding contrite, and Rosalie smacked Emmett in the shoulder.

"You quit egging them on, Emmett," Esme said. "Where's your brother?" She set a large basket of biscuits on the table.

"How should I know? Ask those two if they're done being all touchy-feely," Emmett answered, taking a seat.

"He'll be down in a minute; he wanted to shower before the rest of us," Jasper explained, holding a chair out for Bella. She smiled at him as she slid into the seat.

"Morning all! Happy Easter!" Alice announced as she danced into the room. She was already dressed for the day in a semi-conservative but spring colored sleeveless dress and a pair of matching heels.

"Good morning, Alice. Can you help me bring in the last few things?" Esme asked, turning back to the kitchen when Alice agreed.

Carlisle arrived, dressed in slacks and a button down; Edward obviously wasn't the only one who'd wanted to get a jump on the rush to the shower. Alice and Esme brought in a plate of bacon and sausage, a carafe of coffee and the milk, Edward just behind them with the butter and jam balanced in his free hand, also dressed for church in dark slacks and a lightweight sweater, his hair still damp and tussled.

Jasper and Edward sat on either side of Bella, with Esme and Carlisle at the heads of the table. The food was passed around after Carlisle said grace and everyone ate their fill. When they were finished, Emmett, Edward, Jasper, and Carlisle cleared the table and did the dishes while Rosalie and Bella went to shower and get dressed.

Bella had brought a spring skirt with a light sweater, and she had a pair of ballet flats that matched. She blew her hair dry and pinned it back just above her ears to keep it out of her face. "Hey, babe," she said when Jasper's face appeared in the mirror.

"You look nice," he said as he bent and switched the taps back on in the shower before he stripped out of his clothes. He kissed her cheek and stepped into the shower, pulling the curtain closed with a laugh at her pout.

While Jasper showered, Bella joined the others downstairs. Carlisle was reading the paper while Emmett and Edward playing some video game.

"Bella, dear, can you help me with something?" Esme called from down the hall.

She kissed Edward's cheek and moved down the hall to Esme's bedroom, and laughed at what she saw. There were six Easter baskets lined up in a row on the bed she shared with Carlisle. Bella could easily identify which basket belonged to which member of the family. There was also a huge pile of candy, and two paper shopping bags that probably contained gifts.

"Would you mind helping me fill these up?" Esme asked, handing her a packet of fake grass.

"Not at all." She and Esme chatted as she got a good bed of the grass in each basket, then helped fill them with candy.

"Alright, off with you now, so you get some kind of surprise," she teased.

Bella laughed and shut the door behind her, making her way back down the hall. Everyone had gathered back up in the living room; Jasper dressed in slacks and a dark shirt, Rosalie in a lavender dress. Edward and Emmett continued to play their video game until Esme emerged, also dressed in a pretty spring colored dress and modest heels.

"Boys, can you get the treats loaded up into Carlisle's car, please?" Esme asked.

"Sure, mom," Emmett answered. After dinner Saturday night they'd sat around talking while they stuffed little gifts and candies into plastic eggs, and assembled little Easter baskets that they'd be giving out to the kids at the hospital. He and Edward put down their controllers and Jasper followed them to the corner where they'd left the bags, and carried them out to the car.

Once the car was loaded, they split up into separate vehicles to drive to the church, Carlisle and Esme going alone in his car, and Bella grinned when she noticed that they hadn't come out of the house yet when Edward pulled the Volvo away from the curb, Jasper an Alice in the back seat, Jasper's guitar in the trunk.

The church service was pretty standard, and Bella spent the time writing in her head as she usually did. She'd never been a big believer in organized religion, and while she could say that she followed a value system that favored Judeo-Christian beliefs, it had been a long time since she'd considered herself a Christian. Renee had been too fond of experimenting with other beliefs for Bella to have a strong foothold in any of them, and Charlie had really only believed in fishing. Still, she could be respectful of her new family's beliefs and she accompanied them to their services with very little fuss; she had a feeling the same might be true for Jasper, who appeared to be paying almost _too_ close attention to what was going on, like he didn't want to get caught making a mistake.

After the service, they loaded back up into the three cars and drove the hospital. Bella hadn't been by to see the kids since the weekend before the Writer's Conference; she couldn't remember if Jasper had made the March gathering or not, since she'd been with Alice and Rose that Saturday preparing for the gallery show.

Emmett was relieved to not have to dress up for this gathering, though he did ham it up as he held the bag for Rosalie to hand out the little baskets, while Jasper took Alice to the big room to prepare the 'hunt' with the plastic eggs they'd prepared. The kids seemed really excited to see them, but Bella ahd a feeling it might have had more to do with the candy than the visitors. She noticed Jasper looking around for someone when all the kids had gathered in the big room, and after awhile, saw he was speaking to one of the nurses in bright scrubs with Easter bunnies on them. When he came back to Bella's side he looked pretty subdued.

"Hey," she said quietly, taking his hand. "What's up?"

"Remember that little girl, Shelly?" he asked. When Bella nodded, he continued. "She's been here every time since I started coming in January, but I didn't see her today," he explained softly. "She's in Seattle, to see a specialist. She wasn't getting better."

"Oh, honey, I'm sorry," Bella said, shifting to put her arm around his waist in a half-hug, resting her head against his chest.

He kissed the top of her head, his lips linger for a minute. "Thanks, Bells. The nurse said she's doing better up there, but won't be back for awhile. She left me a note," he said, a note of sad humor in his voice. He handed her a piece of paper.

On the front of the hand-folded card was a crayon drawing of a flower. She opened it up and giggled. There was a picture of a stick figure with a mop of yellow hair, holding a very rectangular looking instrument she assumed was supposed to be a guitar. Next to him was another stick figure, this one with a spiky mass of red hair, who she could only guess was representing Edward. Little stick figures surrounded them, one with a heart drawn over the head. In childish scrawl, she'd written _Thank you Mr Jasper for playing for us. I'll miss you in Seeturtle. Your very bestest friend, Shelly. PS say hi to your pretty friend Mr Edward and the pretty girl Bella. I like their songs, too_. "Seeturtle?"

"The nurse said she was having trouble saying Seattle," Jasper said quietly with a sad laugh. Bella handed him back the homemade card and he tucked it into his back pocket. She hugged him again.

"She'll be okay, especially if she's seeing a specialist up in Seattle," she assured him.

"I know," Jasper said. He looked down at her. "She was just the first friend I made here."

Bella smiled and kissed his cheek. "Well then, we'll just have to stay around a bit longer so you can make more friends while you woo them all with your mad guitar skills. Maybe we can even persuade Edward to let them wheel that piano in here and you could duet."

"Yeah, I'll let you handle that one, sweetheart. Last time I did that, we had to talk him through a panic attack," he said dryly.

"This could be a good way to prevent that," she said thoughtfully. "Kids don't really know or care about perfection, they just want someone to have a good time with them."

"True. But I'll still let you have that conversation with him," Jasper said, his tone lighter.

She elbowed him lightly, and they fell quiet, watching the kids run around searching for the plastic eggs that had pretty much been left out in sight. She laughed as they would sit and negotiate trades with each other for candy or toys, or form small groups to play. Once of the volunteers brought in cupcakes, and soon the kids were a sticky hyper mess, which was the queue for the Cullen family to make their exit.

Back at the house, Emmett let out a whooping holler that had Rosalie smacking him in the back of the head and Esme warning him about using his indoor voice.

Esme had set out their Easter baskets on the coffee table, and Emmett had quickly figured out which one was his and had pulled it into his lap, digging through it.

"Emmett, did you ever consider a career as a kindergarten teacher?" Alice teased.

"Yeah, but I always scared 'em," Emmett said with a shrug.

They sat around and "opened" their baskets. Beyond a multitude of candy (save Jasper's which held minimal chocolate, but plenty of the ginger, coffee, and mints Bella and Edward knew he had enjoyed having on hand), they all had a few little gifts inside. Bella found a gift card to Victoria's Secret along with a copy of a DVD she'd been meaning to pick up and a box of his&hers lubricant that her blushing clear to her roots. She sent a dark look at her surrogate mother, who just looked on with an innocent expression and pointed at Carlisle. Bella burst out laughing and poor Carlisle just looked bewildered, probably having no idea what he'd just been blamed for.

When they were done, Esme excused herself to get dinner started.

"We should go get our bags," Alice said. "Dinner will be awhile, and I don't know about you guys, but I'm not planning on sleeping tonight since we have to be at the school so early. We should just stay here and watch movies or something."

"It's okay with me if it's okay with your Aunt," Carlisle said from his seat.

Alice bounced up from her seat and rushed into the kitchen. She came back a few minutes later. "Dinner won't be for at least two hours, so we have time to get back to campus and pack our stuff and come back.

"I want to change first," Bella announced, and when Jasper and Edward had agreed to go, she went back upstairs and quickly exchanged her dress for the yoga pants and t-shirt she'd worn to breakfast.

She rode back to campus with Alice, and they chatted about what they were looking forward to about the trip while the packed, the connecting doors between their rooms open. Bella packed one medium sized suitcase for the week, knowing she'd mostly be in Forks Academy gear based on the emails she'd received from Angela reminding the students. She packed a couple of dresses, just in case. She set her bag by the door, packed up her laptop case, and making sure she had the pattern for the skirt she was making for Alice tucked away with the yarn (she'd double checked that she could take her crochet hooks and small scissors onto the plane as carry-ons).

The boys arrived just as she was finishing up double checking her things. They had one suitcase between them, and Jasper had shouldered a worn backpack; Edward had his messenger bag. Boys. Edward toted their suitcase in his free hand and Jasper wrestled with Bella and Alice's and loaded them all into their cars. The whole venture had taken maybe an hour, and Emmett, Rosalie, and Carlisle were engrossed in a movie when they returned to the house.

Esme made a ham and scalloped potatoes, along with asparagus, and fresh baked rolls. For dessert she served two trifles, one with lemon curd and berries, and one with chocolate cake, fudge, and toffee pieces. Both were enjoyed over coffee and tea and laughter filled conversation.

Since the boys had done the breakfast dishes, Bella, Alice, and Rosalie took care of loading the dishwasher with the dinner dishes and cleaning everything up. The men had all changed out of their nicer clothes for the evening and had gathered in the living room. They spent the night watching movies, Esme and Carlisle retiring first, then Emmett and Rosalie. Alice, Bella, Edward, and Jasper remained awake, Edward with the aid of coffee, until they had to return to the school to meet the busses for their trip to California.

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okay, so I know it was a baby chapter, but after the marathon lengths of the last few, it was needed. :D There will be a 'full length' chapter up next Thursday.

Fandom Gives Back: Eclipse is coming up soon. I'll be putting myself on the author auction block with a few one-shots. Check out http://www(dot)fandomgivesback(dot)com for more information and details.

and just one more: big thanks to all of you who review, nominate this fic for awards and rec on blogs. It makes my day to see that people love these characters and this family as much as I do. :)


	53. Chapter 52: Spring Break

**Thank you, as always, to the fantastic beta team of naelany and wishinforlove.**

**I know this chapter is huge. I could have split it, but I liked it the way it is, so...sorry? ;)**

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Coordinating the Spring Break trip would have been near impossible for Edward to pull off without Angela's help. In return (though he knew she'd only been doing her job), he'd cleared it with the Dean that she'd get to accompany the group, expenses paid by the school since she'd be going as his assistant. Angela had seemed overjoyed at the offer and he added her to the list of chaperones that included Jasper, Alice, and Bella. She'd been invaluable in helping him put everything together, including getting the word out to students that they all needed to be in Forks Academy polo shirts on their travel days, and that they needed to bring their uniforms, as well as making all their travel arrangements and just generally handing things. In the back of his head he made a note that if he was offered the Director of Bands position full time, he wanted her promoted to his assistant and the department could hire someone else.

It was technically Monday morning when Edward, Jasper, Bella, and Alice found Angela already waiting with the two busses that would be taking them to the airport in Seattle. They had an early flight out of Seattle, so the students were expected in the parking lot with their things by 1:00 am. They could have driven to L.A., Edward knew, which would have probably been more cost effective, but he wanted to be able to walk when they finally arrived in Los Angeles, and he didn't know that he could subject everyone to that long of a ride. Besides, he justified to alleviate the feelings of selfishness, by flying they got to spend more time at their destination and less time travelling.

All of them were dressed in Academy polos, though were Jasper and Edward were in jeans, Bella was in a pair of black yoga pants that were cut about mid-calf, with a pair of chucks. When they'd teased her about it that morning as they dressed she just shrugged and said she wanted to be comfortable on the four and a half hour flight after the nearly four hour bus ride. Jasper toted the large suitcase that he and Edward were sharing, along with his backpack that contained his laptop and whatever else he'd packed to keep himself occupied. Edward had his suit and messenger bags. Bella toted a smaller suitcase on wheels and her own messenger bag. The students were only permitted a backpack and suitcase, along with their instruments; their instruments would, for the most part, be considered their carryon luggage. Edward hated the idea of air travel with musical instruments, had experienced too many mishaps to be completely comfortable with it, but Angela had found some extra insurance protection that made the thought a little easier, knowing that the school wouldn't be 100% liable of something happened.

"Morning, Mr. Cullen," Angela greeted him. Her hands were empty, and he guessed she'd already stowed her bags on one of the busses.

"Angela, please," Edward answered, a hit of pleading in his voice. He hadn't had quite enough coffee, and they'd opted against even bothering to try to sleep. Bella giggled and Jasper snickered on either side of him. "Edward, okay? It's too early for the Mr. Cullen bullshit. Actually, just drop the Mr. Cullen altogether."

"Well, for this week, I s'pose," she conceded.

"Thanks," Edward responded dryly, giving Bella's side a pinch when she laughed outright. Jasper laughed as well, taking Bella's suitcase from her to place them both in the underside bays of the first bus. There were too many of them to take one bus to the airport, and Edward knew that Angela had two busses lined up to meet them at LAX to drive them around for the five days they'd be there. He kind of hoped they'd have the same drivers all week; it just made things easier.

Jasper loaded Alice's luggage onto the second bus after Edward asked if she'd ride with Angela.

"What time are the students supposed to be here?" Alice asked.

Edward glanced at his watch. "Now," he said with a frown and a roll of his eyes. He knew it was early; that was kind of the point. They had an evening workshop to attend, and that, combined with the early and long day of travel was supposed to ensure that the students would actually sleep once they got back to the hotel for the night. "We've got a bit of a cushion, though. The flight's not until 6:30, and there shouldn't be much traffic this time of day."

His students began streaming in then from the dorms, toting suitcases, horns, and backpacks. A lot of them were dressed in pajama bottoms or sweat pants with their polo shirts. Jasper and Alice helped them stow their things on the busses while Angela and Edward took roll and got everyone sorted. Once everyone was accounted for, Edward made sure Angela had the duplicate set of the paperwork she'd prepared and boarded the bus, giving the driver permission to go.

Bella had curled up against Jasper in the front seat behind the driver, leaving Edward the pair of seats across the aisle to himself. He stretched out as best he could, his back to the window, legs straight across the two seats.

The drive was mostly quiet. It wasn't long before Edward took note that nearly everyone was asleep, Bella and Jasper included. Edward drowsed, never really finding a solid sleep, but let the music on his iPod lull him into a semi-meditative space that left him feeling rested when they pulled into their terminal at Sea-Tac.

Checking into the airport had been an adventure in and of itself. Everyone had luggage to check, and the adults supervised as the students checked themselves and their luggage in at the kiosks, then made everyone gather to one side so they could go through security as a group.

As always, Edward set off the metal detector when it was his turn through; one of the unseen lasting effects of his accident and surgeries was the metal rods and screws that held parts of his legs together. Once he'd been patted down and thoroughly searched, he rejoined the others on the terminal side of security.

"Listen up," he called over the group of students. "You have," he glanced at his watch "an hour and half to find breakfast, use the toilets, get magazines, whatever. I will be taking roll at our gate in 90 minutes. What gate will I see you at?" he asked.

"B11," the students responded, somewhat more spirited once they knew they'd have time to explore.

"Alright. Please remember that you're representing not only the school and yourselves, but also me, Dr. Swan, Dr. Whitlock, Ms. Brandon, and Ms. Weber. We wish to treat you like adults on this trip, but you're going to have to prove that you're continually worthy of that respect."

The students nodded and murmured affirmatives and he set them loose. They were good kids and he didn't expect anyone to get into too much trouble. He turned his attention back to the other adults. "Do I need to remind you where to be and when?"

Alice laughed. "Nope!" She linked her arm with Angela's. "Let's see what kind of breakfast we can find."

Angela sent Edward a look that seemed to be a mix of "help!" and "don't you need something?" and he waved them on. "See you in a bit." He swallowed his chuckle as Alice dragged the much taller woman off toward the entrance to the concourse where they'd passed a restaurant on their way in. "Coffee?" he asked the other two.

Jasper nodded, Bella's hand in his, and they made their way to the nearest of the two Starbucks in their wing. Jasper and Edward ordered coffee, Bella got hot chocolate, and they all got something to eat before they made their way slowly toward their gate, rather than taking up precious space in the small café area.

Bella still seemed to be half asleep as she snuggled against Edward best she could in the seat next to him, the arm of the chairs preventing them from getting too close. They talked quietly while they had their light breakfast and watched other passengers arrive. Some of the students had the same idea they'd had, and brought take-away containers of food and drink back with them as they gathered in seats and on the floor in a large group, easily identified by their matching shirts. Edward kept a silent headcount as they streamed back in, and by the time he'd said he was going to take roll, they'd all arrived.

When the airline employees got to the gate, Edward and Angela went to see if they'd be able to board early since they were a big group with a lot of carry-ons that couldn't be checked at the last minute. The staff had been alerted and agreed. The group from Forks Academy boarded and Edward found they were largely spread out throughout the plane in pairs. He'd already given his lecture on behavior, and he trusted his kids to be good. Edward made another note to give Angela a nice thank you gift when they returned as he found that his seat partners were Jasper and Bella. They arranged themselves so Bella was in the middle, the armrests between the seats raised, with Edward on the aisle so he could get up and move.

Bella slept for the first half of the flight after takeoff, her head nestled against Jasper's shoulder and her legs tucked up under her; not for the first time Edward found himself jealous of her flexibility and smaller frame. Jasper read, one hand toying with a wisp of Bella's hair as he listened to his iPod. Edward flipped back and forth between a novel and score study, getting up every 30 minutes or so to walk the aisles and check on the students as much to stretch his legs. Once she'd woken up, Bella pulled some yarn and a hook from the bag under the seat in front of her and went to work on her latest project, her own earbuds slightly concealed by her hair. They didn't talk much, though they could've; it just seemed like they needed to be in their own little bubbles as the flight progressed.

By the time they landed, Edward was desperate for air that wasn't recycled, and he could feel Bella starting to get a little twitchy next to him, despite her ease at changing position and stretching as needed. He'd already asked the students to be the last ones off as a courtesy to the other passengers, and they complied and assembled as a group just out of the way of their gate. Edward did another quick headcount and noticed Angela doing the same before they trooped off to baggage claim and then the busses.

Before he got on the bus, Edward conferred with Angela to go over the announcements to the students. Once on board, Edward took the microphone from the bus driver and started his spiel to his students.

"Welcome to L.A.," he began and some of the students laughed. "I want to give you a bit of the itinerary for today and lay out the ground rules for this week. When we get to the hotel, Ms. Weber and I will be getting us checked in. Please remain on the bus until we come get you. You already know who you're rooming with and we're not doing any switching around, understood?"

After everyone nodded and murmured agreement he continued, bracing himself against the seat as the driver set out. "We're going straight to the hotel, and you'll have a couple of hours to yourself. You're on your own for lunch today; there are several places to eat within walking distance of the hotel. You need to be back, in the lobby, in your polo shirts and jeans by 2:30. We have a workshop at Disney at four. This is a combined workshop, so Jazz Ensemble only folks, you may be working with some concert band music." He knew that wouldn't be a problem; most of them had done concert band at some point in the recent past. "Please make sure you have your instruments with you."

He glanced down at his notes. "After the workshop we'll be having dinner together as a group, then returning to the hotel. You'll be very happy to hear that since it's Spring Break there's no enforced study time, though I happen to know for a fact that some of you had some work assigned over the break," he said with a smirk to groans. "Tonight you've got free time in the hotel, and the general rules apply. You're not old enough to order porn, and I'll know who did it, and I'll send you home if I have to," he threatened. "The pool is heated and open until 10 pm, and you can hang out in the lobby or whatever. If you are hanging out with the opposite gender, please leave the doors open. If you leave the hotel to go to one of the restaurants, you must check out with me or one of the other chaperones and tell us where you're going, and make sure to check back in, and take a buddy. We _will_ be doing room checks, and you have an 11 pm curfew. Remember that we're trusting you to be adults. Please don't violate that trust or I will not hesitate to send you home. Any questions?"

There weren't any, and Edward hung up the microphone and took his seat next to Bella at the front of the bus; Jasper had taken the seat across from them.

At the hotel, Edward and Angela again went ahead to get everyone checked in. The students were mostly four to a room (there was one with five). On paper, Angela, Bella, and Alice were sharing while Jasper and Edward had a room to themselves. The students had all self-selected their roommates and once they'd poured off the busses and grabbed their luggage, Edward and Angela started distributing keys and room numbers.

Once everyone had everything off the bus, Edward confirmed the schedule for the afternoon with the drivers, and went with Jasper and Bella to find their room. They pretty much had a whole floor to themselves. The students were getting settled into their rooms as Edward limped down the hall, and he peeked in as they passed, subtly checking on everyone. The girls were in the room across from Edward and Jasper, putting all the adults in the middle, which was at least familiar given the structure of the dorms.

Jasper placed their luggage on the racks in the room and vanished around a corner which Edward assumed was the bathroom.

"Hey," Bella said, getting Edward's attention with a light tug on his free hand as he dropped his messenger bag onto the bureau.

"Hm?" he turned to face her.

"You should sleep," she said quietly, resting her palm on his belly over his clothes and tucking herself under his chin. "It's going to be a long afternoon and you've been up for 36 hours." Her luggage stood by the door, which was propped slightly open with the privacy lock.

Edward slid the handle of his cane back onto his forearm and wrapped his arms around her waist. "Yeah," he agreed, lightly resting his chin on top of her head. "But I've got things to do."

Bella arched her back slightly and Edward shifted, letting her meet his gaze. "You do, or you need to supervise Angela doing things?"

Nothing that had to be done before the workshop (mostly confirming all their reservations) had to be done by him, and if he had to wager, he'd say that Angela was already working on it while Alice sorted out their clothes and unpacked. He sighed.

Bella smiled softly. "Sweetheart, you won't do anyone any good if you run yourself into the ground before this trip has even started. You've got nearly two hours to sleep; I know it's not a lot, but take what you can get, please?" Her smile had transformed into that half-pout she did so well.

Edward kissed her softly. "Alright," he agreed, knowing she had a point. "Sure you guys can keep everything under control?"

Bella just gave him a dirty look and stepped out of his embrace. Edward raised his hands in a placating gesture. "Alright, alright, I'm going," he said, dipping his head to kiss her again quickly, then moving to the bed to kick off his shoes. Jasper hadn't emerged from the bathroom yet, but he could hear water running. With a sigh, he settled on top of the covers. He was asleep almost immediately.

When Bella woke Edward sometime later, he saw that their luggage had been stowed, which meant that everything had been unpacked into the bureau. Bella had also changed into jeans and put her hair up more securely than it had been while they travelled.

"Did you guys eat?" Edward asked, shifting to sit on the edge of the bed, stretching.

Bella sat next to him and rested her head against his shoulder. "Yup. We brought you a sandwich."

Edward kissed the top of her head. "Thanks. Where's Jasper?"

"Wrangling some students," she answered flippantly. "Everything's fine," she assured him before he could start to get worried. "A few rooms got together and ordered some pizzas for lunch and got a little rowdy," she explained, taking his hand and twining their fingers together. "He's dealing with it."

"Okay." He kissed the top of her head again and glanced over at the clock next to the bed. There was still a half-hour before they needed to be in the lobby to meet the busses for their workshop. He'd only slept for about a two hours. Edward scrubbed his hands over his face with a soft groan. At least he knew he'd sleep well when they got back to the hotel that night after dinner.

Bella nudged him gently. "Go clean up and come eat," she directed quietly. "Alice, Angela, and Jas have everything under control for right now. We'll be able to take it easy tonight so you can sleep, okay?" her smile was warm and bright and Edward turned so he could kiss her full on, a hand sliding along her jaw, stopping just under her ear as he cupped her face. Her eyes were sparkling when he pulled away and he kissed her on the nose.

"Okay." He gave her a squeeze and rose, reaching for his cane that he'd propped up against the nightstand. Edward made his way into the bathroom and found their things on the counter. He washed his face and combed his damp fingers through his hair, feeling slightly more refreshed. He was just glad that he wouldn't have to do much during the workshop that afternoon.

Bella had unwrapped his sandwich and produced a bottle of rootbeer from somewhere when Edward returned to the bedroom. She joined him at the table off to one side and they talked as Edward ate, feeling himself wake up slightly as his delayed lunch was consumed.

"Hey you," Jasper said as he entered. "Sleep well?"

Edward shrugged, swallowing the last bite of his sandwich. "What little of it there was."

Jasper crossed the room and kissed him softly, then Bella with a fond smile as she turned her face up expectantly. "We'll just have to make sure you sleep well tonight then," he said with a leer.

Edward snorted. He really didn't think sleep was going to be an issue for any of them, but he'd roll with whatever mischief they got into once the students were in for the night. Bella rolled her eyes but kissed Edward's cheek before she got up and disappeared around the corner into the bathroom. Jasper slid into the chair she'd vacated.

"Doing okay?" he asked quietly

Edward nodded. "Stiff and sore, but much better than when we went to San Francisco."

"You'll let us know if you need anything, right?"

Edward smiled and leaned over to kiss Jasper softly, curling his fingers into the soft hair at the back of Jasper's head. When he broke the kiss, Edward rested his forehead against Jasper's and felt the other man's breath wash across his cheek. "Of course," he answered softly. He felt Jasper's answering nod, and smiled at the happy sounding sigh that came from the other side of the room. "Come here," Edward said to Bella, holding out his other hand in invitation without breaking contact with Jasper.

She slid onto their laps, half on Edward's thigh and half on Jasper's, wrapping her arms around their backs for balance.

"Thank you for coming with me," Edward said quietly. "I know it's going to be a long week, but hopefully we'll get a little time to ourselves."

"I think you'd have had a hard time getting us to not come with you," Bella answered. She kissed him softly, then turned and kissed Jasper before sliding from their laps. "We should get going."

"Slave driver," Jasper muttered, but Edward saw his smile. Jasper rose and gave Edward a hand up, kissing him before stepping away. "Thanks for letting us come, even if we're going to have to actually work," he said, teasing.

Edward grabbed his messenger bag from where it was still sitting at the foot of the bed while Jasper picked up his backpack and took Bella's hand, following Edward out.

The students were all assembled promptly, and after he took roll, they clambered excitedly on the busses for the trip to Disney for their workshop. They were there plenty early and the students somewhat patiently waited, and eventually they were led into their space and met the clinician.

The workshop was 90 minutes, and Edward learned a lot of tricks from the Disney staff member who led his students through various exercises. The students seemed to have a really good time, though it seemed like the rest of the chaperones were maybe not as impressed, not that Edward could blame them. Bella worked with some yarn and Jasper read, while it looked like Alice and Angela chatted quietly, and Edward was sure they were quickly on their way to becoming good friends.

While the students packed up, Edward thanked the clinician, once all the students' questions had been asked and answered. Bella and Jasper guided the students back to the busses while Alice made sure nothing had been left behind. She snagged up a few sweatshirts that had been left on the backs of chairs and carried them out to the bus just ahead of Edward and Angela.

Though they were all eating dinner at the same place, Angela and Edward decided that a buffet was probably the best choice so that the students could have freedom to do their own thing while still being (ostensibly) supervised, and the chaperones could have a bit of a break. Angela called ahead from the bus to let the place know they would be invading with 70 people and planned to be there for about two hours.

Angela went off the bus first when they arrived to pre-settle the bill, then came back to make the announcement to the students. "Listen up, please," she called over the microphone of the first bus. "Your dinner includes the buffet and a soft drink, water, ice tea, or coffee. Anything else needs to be paid extra at the register. Make sure the person at the register sees your t-shirt; that's your meal ticket tonight." With that she handed the microphone back to the driver and made her way off to the second bus to repeat the announcement.

"Dismissed!" Jasper called to general laughter, and the students streamed off the bus, leaving bags behind after being assured that the bus would be secured while they ate.

Once the students had gone through and gotten their food, the chaperones went through. Edward noted that he and Bella all took fairly small portions of their selections, since they were sharing a tray; for his part, he was tired enough that he really didn't feel like eating, and he could only guess by the way Bella was kind of shuffling along that she was the same. "Not hungry?" he asked her quietly, only somewhat worried.

She shrugged, offering him a half smile. "Tired."

He kissed the top of her head before stepping to one side so she could carry their tray. "Yeah, me too."

They joined Angela and Alice at the large table they'd selected, Jasper squeezing in on one end of the table.

"Angela, I'm so glad you were able to come with us," Edward said sincerely. "I don't know that I'd be able to manage without you."

Angela smiled and shrugged. "It's no problem. My boyfriend's on maneuvers this week anyway, so I was just going to mope around at home, since I couldn't go see him. It's nice having someplace to visit."

"Maneuvers?" Jasper asked.

She nodded. "Ben's ROTC at Washington State."

"How long have you been together?" Alice asked, and from there they started to get to know Angela a little bit better, driven mostly by Alice's need to know everything about everyone. They learned that she and Ben had been high school sweethearts, and that Angela had finished her degree a year ahead of Ben, but was waiting to go back to either graduate school or to get her teaching certificate once they found out where he'd be stationed with the Army. Edward was sad to know that he might lose her at the end of the school year when Ben graduated and he got his assignment.

The chat made the meal pass quickly as they all shared a bit about their lives, mostly for Angela's benefit, and before Edward knew it, the two hours they'd promised the students was up and they were ready to go.

Back at the hotel, after giving the drivers the schedule for the next day, Edward rejoined everyone in the lobby. The students, re-energized by dinner, fled to their rooms to change into non-uniform clothes or swim suits and headed for the pool or lounge. A couple of students had brought some cards and set up some games, while another had brought one of Bella's favorites, Apples to Apples, and started a small game, inviting other hotel patrons to join them. They were well behaved, and Edward was proud of the way they handled themselves as they socialized.

At ten, Edward made the announcement that they needed to be shutting things down for quiet hours. Though there curfew was eleven, he felt better having them beginning to head for their rooms rather than leaving everything to the last minute. The students all complied, and by eleven, Edward and the others had no problems checking the rooms and making sure everyone was in for the night. He had a roll of blue tape in his bag, but didn't think he'd need to use it; none of his kids wanted to get sent home, and they knew he'd do it if any of them broke the few and simple rules he'd laid out for them.

After bidding Alice and Angela goodnight, Edward, Jasper, and Bella went into their room. Bella sagged onto the bed with a quiet groan, her elbows on her thighs as she cradled her head in her hands. Jasper kissed the top of her head and whispered something to her that made her nod as Edward crossed to the bathroom and his toiletry bag where he'd packed his pills. He took his regular evening dose and brushed his teeth quickly after taking out his contacts, before moving back into the bedroom to change into a pair of pajama bottoms and a thin t-shirt. He settled in an open space and worked through some stretches he'd learned from Jane, while on the other side of the bed, Bella, changed back into her yoga pants and a tank top swept through some yoga positions while Jasper changed and used the bathroom.

"You guys make me feel like a slacker," Jasper commented, turning off the bathroom light behind him. "I feel like I need to go for a run or something now," he teased.

Edward grinned. "There's a gym with a treadmill downstairs, if you think you're not going to get enough exercise in running after the students this week."

Jasper returned the smile. "Naw, I think I'll be good."

Bella, apparently finished with her own brief workout kissed Jasper's cheek lightly as she passed him, taking her turn in the bathroom. It took her a few more minutes than it'd taken Jasper and Edward, and by the time she returned, Edward'd finished his stretches and Jasper had turned down the bed and switched off all the lights besides the one just next to the bed.

Edward accepted Jasper's hand up off the floor. Bella climbed into bed with a happy groan and sigh as she laid on her stomach in the middle of the bed, her arms curling around a pillow. Jasper kissed Edward and let him go, moving to the opposite side of the bed to slide in behind Bella, while Edward propped his cane up against the nightstand and sat on the edge of the bed, setting the alarm for the next morning. After switching off the light, Edward stripped out of his t-shirt before swinging his legs up onto the bed and turning his body toward Bella's. Her breathing was already deep and even, and Edward quickly followed her into sleep, feeling Jasper's hand warm on his back as he drifted off.

Beside him, Bella groaned as the alarm sounded Tuesday morning. Edward laughed softly and kissed the top of her head, letting her snuggle back up to Jasper as he climbed from the bed and headed to the shower. They had to get an early start to get the students organized for the day; they had two workshops at UCLA in the morning, and then after lunch another workshop for the concert band back at Disney before the Jazz Ensemble performed in the park. The day was full, but Edward had planned for that and Wednesday was a 'free day' at Disneyland for everyone.

When Edward was done in the shower he dressed in slacks and a button up shirt with the sleeves rolled to his elbows. The students largely had some kind of uniform to wear most days, whether their polo shirts (which they'd be gathering up to wash Wednesday evening) or the tour t-shirts Angela had ordered. It cut down on the amount of packing the students had to do, but also made it easier to keep track of everyone (not that Edward couldn't identify all his students on sight). He slipped into his shoes and perched on the edge of the bed, pressing his lips to Jasper's. "Hey, baby."

Jasper's eyes blinked open and he smiled softly. His eyes were clear, so Edward knew he'd been awake for a bit. "Mornin'."

"I'm going down for coffee and stuff. You might want to get her moving," he said, gesturing at their sleeping girlfriend. "We need to be downstairs in just over an hour."

"Mmkay," Jasper answered with a soft smile.

Edward kissed him again and rose, snagging his key from the bureau before letting himself out, hearing Jasper start to rouse Bella as he left.

He found several students roaming the breakfast buffet in their pajamas and he greeted them with nods as he filled two cups with coffee and one with hot water, stuffing a tea bag into his pocket. He loaded a plate with sliced fruit and another with pastries and begged a tray from an employee to get everything back up to their room.

The shower was running and the bed was rumpled and empty when Edward returned. A thud from the bathroom made him smile and shake his head as he set the tray on the table in the room. A second heavy sounding noise, followed by a groan and a giggle had Edward laughing softly and fighting the desire to strip out of his clothes and investigate. They didn't really have time for that, so Edward switched on the TV and found local morning news to occupy himself as he had his coffee and waited for his lovers to emerge from the bathroom.

Bella came out first, her hair wrapped up in a hotel towel, her own robe draped over her shoulders. She was smiling brightly, color high on her cheeks as she crossed the room to where Edward was sitting and kissed him softly.

"Have fun?" Edward asked with a smirk as she perched on his thigh, reaching for the tea he'd started when he heard the shower shut off.

"Mm-hm," she answered with a smile, blowing across the top of the cup before she took a sip, her eyes lowered, but she was looking at him, her smile fading to a shifty smirk.

"What?" He asked, wrapping an arm around her back to keep her steady.

She shook her head as she took a long drink of the hot beverage.

"Yeah, I doubt that," he answered, kissing her temple as Jasper drifted out of the bathroom, limping slightly, a towel slung low around his hips, his hair in wild disarray where he'd run a towel through it. Edward gave Jasper look and he just shrugged.

"Sex in the shower always sounds like a better idea than it really is," he answered dryly. "Especially with someone as klutzy as our girl."

Bella started laughing, inhaling a mouthful of tea which set her coughing. Edward rescued the cup from her hands so she didn't spill and scald herself as he rubbed her back. Tears were streaming down her bright pink face, and Jasper just rolled his eyes and moved to the bureau where he'd unpacked his clothes.

"You okay?" Edward asked Bella when she'd stopped coughing, snorts of laughter still escaping her.

Bella just nodded. She kissed him quickly then hopped off his lap to find her own clothes.

"Stay away from me, woman," Jasper said, the grin on his face making the comment more teasing than hurtful. "I think you've done me enough damage today."

"I kissed it and made it better," she protested.

Edward wondered exactly what had transpired in the shower, but decided he was better off not knowing the details as Jasper snorted, but kissed her softly before he dropped his towel and shimmied into a pair of boxer briefs. He heard Bella hiss through her teeth and he looked up from the piece of melon he was trying to spear to see a truly contrite look on her face.

"Sorry, Jas," she said quietly.

"Hey, don't worry about it," Jasper consoled her, tugging her into a hug. "It'll bruise, but it'll be fine. No permanent harm done, and it was all in the name of fun, right?"

She nodded, worrying her bottom lip between her teeth.

"So stop worryin'," he chastised, running his thumb over her lips to free it from her upper teeth. "Get dressed before Edward has a conniption."

Edward rolled his eyes but Bella giggled, and Jasper turned back around, revealing the mark across the back of his thigh that had gotten Bella's attention. If he had to guess, Edward'd say that he was rammed into the soap ledge in the shower. Jasper tugged on a pair of snug fitting jeans and a clean Forks Academy polo. Bella dressed in a long denim skirt with a tour t-shirt over a long-sleeved t-shirt. Once they were dressed, they joined Edward for a quick breakfast before Bella went off to do something with her hair, and Jasper unpacked and repacked the backpack with things they'd need for the day. The TV remained on low in the background as they chatted while getting ready, and with a few minutes to spare, they headed back down to the lobby where Angela and Alice (and just a couple of students) were waiting.

Once all the students had gathered and Edward had taken roll, he ran through them the itinerary for the day. The students loaded up and they set off for their first workshop of the day with two band directors at UCLA.

They were met at the school by some student escorts, who split the bands up and led them away. Angela, Bella, and Alice trailed behind the Wind Ensemble, leaving Edward and Jasper to accompany the Jazz group. Edward grabbed a map from one of the young women guiding the Wind Ensemble away so he could find them later.

Edward and Jasper took seats along the wall in the rehearsal hall and observed the workshop without interfering. After an hour, Edward took off with a nod at Jasper to seek out his other group. He found them hard at work on the floor below, Alice, Angela, and Bella likewise sitting quietly at the room, watching the proceedings. When they were finished, Edward and Angela thanked both directors (and were told that they'd get tapes of both workshops in the mail in the next couple weeks) and then guided the excited students back toward the busses.

Angela had booked a restaurant banquet room for them to have lunch as a group with a pre-arranged menu selection for everyone to choose from. The students were still pretty hyped up from the workshops, so Edward was glad they had a secluded room to themselves so they weren't disturbing other customers. Energetic though they were, the students were well behaved, not giving their serving staff too much trouble. The adults were spread through the group, so Edward didn't get a chance to talk with Jasper or Bella, but the students kept him almost busy enough he didn't notice. Once again, Edward took the opportunity of having all the students gathered to remind them of the afternoon schedule.

After lunch, they were headed to Disneyland. The concert band had a workshop, and following that the Jazz Ensemble was performing at Carnation Plaza. One bus, Bella, Angela, and Alice would remain at the park for those students who wanted to take advantage of the evening hours they had free. Edward, Jasper, and the other bus would take any remaining students back to the hotel for the evening. The students were on their own for dinner.

Edward and Angela went with the Wind Ensemble to their workshop while the others took the Jazz Ensemble into the park so they could get set up and ready for their performance. The workshop for the Wind Ensemble went well and the students had a lot of fun getting to be studio musicians for awhile, and they had just enough time to make it from the workshop space into Disneyland for Edward to change backstage at Carnation Plaza and lead the Jazz Ensemble on only a couple of minutes late. They had a large audience, mostly augmented by the Wind Ensemble being required to attend, but it also seemed like a lot of park visitors were taking advantage of the place to sit down and enjoy live entertainment while having a snack.

Edward didn't bother to change after the concert. Once the students had decided who was staying behind for a few hours of fun and who was ready to return to the hotel, Edward and Jasper shepherded the hotel-bound group back to the bus. Some of the students were visibly wilting, and Edward couldn't really blame them. The ride back to the hotel was quiet as the subdued students were lulled by the motion of the bus; Edward found himself in a similar state, his eyes drooping closed, and he heard Jasper's quiet chuckle when Edward's head landed on Jasper's shoulder.

"We're here, baby," Jasper said softly when Edward felt the bus come to a stop.

Edward pulled himself upright while Jasper moved to stand.

"Same rules apply guys, alright? Co-ed social time means open doors. Quiet hours at ten, doors closed in your own rooms at eleven, if not before," Jasper said. "If you leave the hotel, remember to have a buddy and check out with Mr. Cullen or myself and let us know where you're going, right?"

"Yes, Dr. Whitlock," the students chorused.

Jasper laughed. "Get out of here," he said, moving out of the aisle of the bus to let them by.

The students dragged their bags and instruments off the bus and Jasper and Edward waited until the bus was empty before they got off. Edward was stiff and it took him a minute to get moving once they'd come down the stairs from the bus, but Jasper was patient and slowed his pace to match Edward's.

Once he got moving Edward was okay, and he and Jasper made their way up to their room to drop off their bags. Jasper shut the door behind them, and Edward looked up, thinking they were going back downstairs to be accessible for the students. Instead, Jasper pulled Edward to him and kissed him deeply, his hands sliding against the stubble on Edward's jaw. Edward deepened the kiss, opening his mouth to Jasper's tongue, hearing himself moan softly as he and Jasper drew each other closer.

Edward felt Jasper respond, and felt him harden against Edward's thigh, where he'd shifted his leg between Jasper's. Edward broke the kiss. "Baby, we have to stop," he gasped out, skimming his hand up Jasper's cotton-clad belly to his chest. "The students…"

Jasper sighed, his forehead resting against Edward's. "Yeah."

Edward kissed him again, more tenderly than needy. "After Bella's back, and light's out," he promised quietly with a small smile.

Jasper nodded. They stayed together for another long moment until Jasper straightened. "Alright. Let's go be grown-ups."

Edward chuckled, kissed him again swiftly, then led him back out into the hall. They checked the rooms, finding open doors and mostly quiet students relaxing, and then headed down to the lobby.

"Dr. Whitlock?" A couple of students were standing by in sweats with towels draped over their arms, and Jasper followed them out to the pool to supervise while Edward settled down to split his attention between a game of spoons, a study session, and the novel he'd packed. It was early evening, and, after awhile, several of the Forks Academy students checked out in pairs or small groups to venture out for something to eat.

Edward texted Bella, and she let him know that they were getting something to eat while still in Disneyland, so Edward went in search of Jasper. He was still at the pool, stretched out on a lounge chair keeping half-an-eye on the students in and around the pool. "Hey," he greeted, lowering himself into the chair next to Jasper.

"Hey," Jasper responded with a smile. "What's up?"

"Food?" Edward suggested.

Jasper shrugged.

"Not hungry?" Edward asked, shifting to prop his left leg onto Jasper's lounge, idly (and subtly) running his toes over Jasper's calf.

"Not really," Jasper answered. "Are you? I can hold things down if you want to go grab something."

"Will you be later?" Edward asked in response, not really answering the question.

"Yeah, probably. What are you thinking?" Jasper shifted his leg to brush up against Edward's calf.

"Seeing if the desk clerk could recommend a Chinese place that delivers," Edward answered. "Bella's eating with the girls in the park, and that way we can piece or have leftovers for later this week. We can't leave the students here unsupervised, and I don't want to go eat by myself."

Jasper nodded. "Sounds like a good idea."

"Want me to get anything special?"

Jasper shook his head. "You know what I like," he said with a bit of a leer.

Edward kicked him lightly as he rolled his eyes.

Laughing, Jasper continued. "Whatever you want is fine," he said over the splashing going on in the pool.

"Okay," Edward agreed, levering himself out of his chair. "You're okay out here?"

"Oh yeah," Jasper said with a grin, stretching his arms up over his head before bending them to rest his head on them, his elbows sticking out. "Sunshine, water, warm weather. What's not to be okay?"

"Well, if you get sick of it, lemme know and I'll take over lifeguarding duty," Edward said with a smirk.

Jasper nodded and offered Edward a wink before Edward made his way back inside to speak with the desk clerk. She gave him a couple of menus with a bright smile, and Edward took himself off to a corner where he could still see what was going on in the lobby area to order dinner for himself and Jasper. He gave the restaurant his room number, but said he'd be waiting in the lobby if they could just take the delivery to the front desk. He was promised to have his food in less than thirty minutes.

While he waited, Edward paced slowly around, checking on the students who were still downstairs, and taking the elevator up to do a quick sweep of the floor to make sure the students in their rooms were obeying co-ed rules. They were, mostly settled in to watch TV or talk.

Jasper was just coming in from the pool deck when Edward got back downstairs. "Tired of the sunshine?" he teased.

Jasper laughed. "The students apparently were," he answered. "They're going to shower and head out for a food run," he advised Edward.

"Okay. Everything seems quiet," he said. "The girls won't be back for a few more hours." They were leaving the park at ten, since the students would have the entire day, until the midnight closing time, the next day. Together they walked toward the reception desk, just in time to see someone arrive with a couple of plastic bags. Edward paid the young man and gave him a pretty good tip for the timeliness and extra inconvenience. "Want to go upstairs?" He asked Jasper.

"You head up," Jasper answered. "I'll let everyone down here know."

Edward nodded and made his way to the elevator, the two bags in hand. He leaned on his cane more out of habit than the need for it to support him. He'd noticed over the past two days that he was in significantly less pain than he would have been in had he attempted the trip the year previous. As reluctant has he'd been to consider the physical therapy, he had to admit that working with Jane had done wonders for his mobility. Sure, he was still sore and stiff, but he knew that was something that would plague him for the rest of his life. Maybe, he decided as the elevator chimed, he'd finally just gotten himself to a place mentally where he could fully accept his short comings.

He knew he'd likely have to use the cane for the rest of his life. Though he was walking better without it (as Jane made him practice in therapy), he knew he'd always have a limp, and the cane helped to keep his weight balanced in compensating for it, which Edward knew would prevent another injury like he'd had before Thanksgiving. His balance had also been affected by the accident, something that he wasn't sure he completely understood, but it was something else he'd learned to deal with. The small victories he'd achieved in the past six months weren't insignificant, and Edward knew he had Jasper to thank for some of that.

Still, he was looking forward to actually being able to enjoy the day in Disneyland the next day, without being afraid of being in crippling pain when they returned to the hotel. He knew that Jasper would pack up painkillers in the backpack without Edward needing to ask, and that he and Bella would both pace themselves to match what Edward was capable of. Through his work with Jane he better understood his body and its limits, and he knew that if he had to, he wouldn't be too ashamed to have to take a break, or, if it really came to it, rent a wheelchair. He didn't think it would, though; he hadn't faced a significant setback in months and Jane (and Dr. Card) had been impressed with his progress.

Edward had to juggle his bags and the cane to get the key to their room out of his back pocket and unlock the door. He flipped the privacy lock to prop the door open both for Jasper and for the students to know they were in and could knock. He carried the bags to the table, then turned to the mini fridge in the room for a bottle of water.

He unpacked the bags, unloading cartons of fried rice, noodles, sesame chicken, dumplings, beef and broccoli, and sweet and sour prawns. It was way too much food, but Edward was sure it'd get eaten, if not by him or his lovers, then by Alice.

"Hey, baby," Jasper said softly as he entered, leaving the door propped open with the latch like Edward had. "Damn. I didn't know that Emmett was joining us for dinner," he teased, kicking his shoes into a corner of the room and turning one of the chairs backwards, propping his chin in his hands against the back of it as he sat.

Edward threw a cellophane wrapped fortune cookie at him. "Shut it."

Jasper caught it easily and put it back on the table. "Did they give us plates?"

Edward nodded and pulled them from the bottom of the bag, along with a pile of chopsticks and packets of soy sauce, hot mustard, and chili sauce. He started popping the containers open and dishing up a bit of everything onto a double layer of paper plates and sat in the seat nearest to Jasper, scooting just a bit closer than strictly necessary.

Jasper stole bits of food off Edward's plate, nibbling until Edward chided him to just get his own. Jasper argued that it tasted better off Edward's plate (and his fingers, he whispered in Edward's ear, but Edward smacked him, knowing that wouldn't lead anywhere appropriate with their door open and them being the only responsible adults on the floor). Edward ate until he was full and Jasper pieced.

"Can we stay up here, or do we need to go back to the lobby?" Jasper asked, sitting back in his chair, his hand at the back of Edward's neck, lightly stroking with his fingers.

"We can stay," Edward answered. The students knew where they were, and he trusted them. He leaned into Jasper's touch. "Movie?"

"Mm," Jasper hummed in agreement.

Edward shifted slightly in his chair and kissed Jasper quickly before he rose and started packing all the food back up. He heard Jasper move behind him, then the TV switch on.

"Here," Jasper said, leaning around Edward to gather up the cartons. Edward let him shift everything to the mini fridge and Edward went into the bathroom to take out his contacts and wash up. He kind of wanted to change his clothes, but since they were still 'on duty' he settled for toeing off his shoes next to Jasper's.

He joined Jasper on the bed, and they kind of curled up together against the headboard, Edward leaning on Jasper's shoulder while Jasper flipped through channels until they finally agreed on a movie.

They were interrupted regularly as the students returned from their dinner expeditions, but by the time the movie was over it was time for the girls to be returning with the rest of the students and for Edward and Jasper to be enforcing quiet hours. Neither of them bothered to put their shoes back on before they took to the hallways, making sure all the students were in their own rooms, and Jasper took a quick jog down to the lobby to double check that there wasn't anyone lingering.

Edward was still in the hall when students began coming off the elevator. They nodded at him as they stumbled, exhausted toward their rooms.

"All present and accounted for, boss," Angela reported, looking like she was ready to crawl into bed while Alice still looked perky and fresh next to her.

"All here too," he responded. "Get some sleep. We're leaving at 9 in the morning."

Angela nodded. Alice tiptoed up and kissed his cheek as she passed. "Thanks for letting me come with you, Edward. I'm having such a good time."

He hugged her. "Good."

She smiled and bounced off after Angela.

Bella came up the stairs, holding Jasper's hand. She'd found a baseball cap somewhere in Disneyland and had it pulled down low over her face, casting her features into shadow.

"We're all good," Jasper said. "No one's left downstairs."

Edward nodded and took Bella's other hand and they walked back to their room together. Jasper unlocked the door and held it for them, lightly tweaking the brim of Bella's new hat as she passed him. She took it off as they entered the dimly lit room, revealing the pink stain of sunburn across her nose and cheeks as her ponytail streamed through the gap in the back. She tossed her hat onto the bed and walked up to Edward, placing her hands flat on his chest.

Edward arched an eyebrow but bent down slightly. She met his lips, and Edward let his cane clatter to the floor as his arms went around her back to help lift her a bit so he could straighten up. She wobbled slightly on the very tips of her toes until Jasper stepped up behind her, pressing his chest to her back, and pushing her further into Edward.

"Something you want, sweetheart?" Jasper asked lowly.

"Yes," Bella answered decisively. "There is _something_ that I want."

"Want to tell us what that might be?" Edward teased, lowering her slowly back to the floor, savoring the feeling of her body sliding against his.

"Hm," she said thoughtfully, her hands skimming up and down Edward's shirt-covered chest before she went to work on his buttons, starting near the top. "No," she answered after a moment. "I think I'll just show you."

Jasper laughed quietly, his hands still around her hips as he tugged her lightly back against him, away from Edward. "I think you're giving off some pretty strong hints, darlin'. Not sure it'll be much of a surprise."

She stopped with Edward's buttons and turned to Jasper, a bright smile on her face. "I am, am I?" she asked, plucking at his Forks Academy polo that was tucked into his jeans. "Guess I need more practice." She managed to get his shirt untucked, flipping up the hem to reveal Jasper's thin undershirt and the trail of dark hair that disappeared into the waistband of his jeans.

Jasper laughed and kissed her. "You can practice on us anytime," he promised.

Bella's expression closed off for a moment; she gave herself a shake and patted his cheek, then turned back to Edward. His t-shirt was revealed slowly as she finished unbuttoning his shirt. Edward leaned around her slightly to kiss Jasper, and Bella hummed happily between them as Jasper pressed the kiss deeper, their bodies enveloping hers between them. Bella slid Edward's shirt from his shoulders and it slipped to the floor, the sleeves having been rolled up to his elbows. He broke the kiss with Jasper so she could slip his t-shirt over his head (with a bit of Jasper's help).

Bella slid down Edward's body where they stood in the middle of the room, her short nails lightly scraping over his chest on the way down to the waistband of his trousers as she knelt.

"Bella, honey," Jasper started, one of his hands going to the top of her head where she knelt in front of Edward, her hands poised to undo the button. "As much as I'm sure Edward, and I, would like nothing more than to have your gorgeous mouth on his cock, you don't have to do this, if you don't want to."

Edward wanted to protest, that she absolutely needed to finish what she'd started, but there was apparently more to the statement than Edward understood. Though, knowing about her relationship with James, it wasn't hard to figure out what Jasper meant.

"I want to," Bella said, her voice slightly husky as she slid her hands down Edward's hips, Jasper's body, her thumbs in the V of his still clothed hips, coaxing a hiss from Edward as her knuckles brushed against his growing erection trapped between two layers of clothes. "I know you don't expect anything from me, which means I can enjoy this, too."

"I'll make sure you do, darlin', if you'll move this to the bed," Jasper promised, kneeling slightly to press his lips to the back of her neck, then moving slowly up and around to the side of her face, nibbling lightly on her earlobe.

"Okay," Bella agreed. She popped the button on Edward's pants and undid the zip quickly. As she rose less than gracefully to her feet, her hands pushed down on the waistband of Edward's trousers and boxers. She spun around quickly and her hands went straight to Jasper's jeans. Bella made short work of getting him out of his jeans and boxer briefs while Edward stepped away for the small kit he travelled with that held the lube, condoms and other things. When he came back, Jasper was completely naked with his hands up Bella's shirt from behind her.

Bella's head was tipped back against Jasper's shoulder and he trailed his nose up and down her neck as his fingers crept higher under her shirt. Edward tossed the bag onto the bed and joined them, standing in front of Bella. He repeated her actions, deftly undoing the button fly on her jeans without kneeling in front of her (for fear he wouldn't be able to get back up). When he finished, Edward slid his hands around her hips and she wriggled slightly as he pushed down her jeans and the pale pink panties she wore underneath.

Edward kissed her, his hands sliding back up her hips to mingle with Jasper's under her shirt. Edward's fingers brushed the soft fabric of her bra and she shivered lightly. When Bella broke the kiss, Jasper lifted her shirt over her head and dropped it to the floor. "Bed," Jasper growled quietly, his fingers sliding away and as they awkwardly walked back to the bed, Bella's bra fell from her breasts and Jasper slid his hands down her shoulders, moving the straps down until he could tug the bra off and dropped it to the floor.

They stopped moving when Edward's legs bumped against the edge of the bed. He sat and Bella carefully straddled his lap, Jasper still moving behind her. Jasper's hands moved over her upper body while Edward clutched lightly at her hips as she ground down on him a bit, making him bite his lip and moan. Jasper leaned over Bella's shoulder to kiss Edward, which pushed them all down onto the bed, Bella giggling as she was squished between them.

Jasper rolled off to one side, tugging a giggling Bella with him, his hands on her hips. She squirmed against him until Jasper let her go, and she rolled over onto her stomach, and then climbed to her knees and straddled Jasper with a slightly predatory look on her face. Jasper scooted back a bit, stopping when he hit the pillows at the head of the bed.

Edward pulled himself up into a seated position, then got to his feet so he could climb onto the bed as well, reaching for the travel kit of supplies as he did. He approached Bella from behind, reaching out to let her know he was there, since she still sometimes reacted badly if someone snuck up on her.

"I believe you said something about my mouth on your cock?" Bella asked, her voice in a lower register than normal as she stared at Jasper. Her hands were on his chest, nails lightly scraping as they traced the line of his sternum to his belly button, then lower. She curled one hand around Jasper's length and gave a slow teasing stroke. Edward watched from behind Bella, his hands around her waist as Jasper's expression shifted from wary to wanting, and he couldn't help but chuckle as he realized that Bella had them both exactly where she wanted them.

While she focused on Jasper for the moment, Edward turned his attention to her. He dug a condom from the bag and tossed it down next to him, letting his hands wander over Bella's body. He was beginning to be able to read her body's reactions almost as well as Jasper's, and he let her flushed skin guide him as he dropped kisses all over her upper back, neck and shoulders, his hands skimming up her abdomen to her breasts, the heels of his hands brushing over her nipples, causing them to draw up tight as she breathed heavily. Encouraged by her reaction he continued to lavish attention there, unable to suckle and nuzzle as he would like since he was behind her, but he used his hands to continue to coax arousal from her body while she teased Jasper into an eager state as well.

Bella trailed kisses down Jasper's body until she knelt down far enough to take him into her mouth. Jasper groaned at the contact, and he clutched lightly at her sides. He skimmed a finger up Bella's flank then reached behind her for Edward.

Edward took her from behind, giving her little warning before he entered her. She was ready for him, warm and slick, and he felt the vibration her pleasured noise sent through her body, and Jasper seemed to appreciate it as well, the hand he'd curled around Edward's hip tightening in response.

It took a moment for Edward to get any kind of rhythm established. It was an awkward position, and with Bella unable to really give any leverage, Edward needed to do most of the work in a position that wasn't really comfortable for him. But he managed, mostly teasing her with a variety of lengths and pauses in the movement of his hips. He also didn't want her to hurt herself or Jasper, and so didn't move too quickly, trying to build up a leisurely pace of anticipation for himself and Bella while Jasper got the privilege of her mouth on him.

Jasper's hands seemed to clutch at whatever skin he could find, Edward or Bella's, one of his hands occasionally going to her hair, either to caress or guide, but Edward could see, even through the haze of lust that he was trying awfully hard not to press her closer to him, but to allow her to maintain control over the pace and pressure she was exerting. Entranced as he was by the two of them together, Edward had ceased his movements and shook himself slightly, returning to the slow teasing rhythm, shifting his attention back to Bella while his own need grew.

Bella pulled her mouth off Jasper with a gasp, her hand sliding up from the base where she'd stopped stroking to replace her mouth just as Jasper's back arched slightly and his legs drew up as he came over her fist. Edward barely noticed, focused on making Bella come to orgasm before he did. Edward altered his rhythm slightly, tugging on her hips so she was seated on him a bit more firmly as he rolled his clit between his fingers.

One of her hands went over and behind them, to the back of Edward's head. Her fingers tightened in his hair and he grunted with the pain, but it just spurred him on. Jasper's hands began to wander again after a moment, and between the two of them it took only moments for them to bring her to completion, shuddering and panting between them. Edward came heartbeats later, his teeth scraping against Bella's shoulder as his hands tightened around her hips.

They both slumped forward on top of Jasper, who chuckled softly and wrapped his arms around them.

"You didn't make me swallow," Bella murmured, sounding slightly surprised a few minutes later when they shifted so Jasper wasn't buried under both of their weights.

"Of course not, honey," Jasper answered. "That's your choice." Edward had noticed that although Jasper had, at points, had his hands in her hair as she'd sucked him off, he hadn't used that contact to control her in any way, though Edward knew how hard that had to have been. "I know it's not always the most pleasant experience in the world," he consoled her quietly.

Bella giggled, then snorted, probably at the same image Edward had in his head of Jasper gagging as he went down on an anonymous cock. Edward had had enough similar experiences that he could sympathize. "Neither of us want you to do anything you're not comfortable with, Bella," Edward added, hugging her close.

"James got upset if I didn't swallow," she said in a small voice. "It was like it offended him or something."

Jasper stroked through her hair before cupping a cheek in one hand. "We're not him, darlin'. Yeah, some guys really get off on that, but some of us understand that it's a gift."

"He always laughed at me, because I'd choke," Bella continued, her voice sounding far away. "But whenever I said I didn't like it, because it hurt, he just told me that he'd be my willing practice dummy so I'd get better."

They hadn't outright spoken about any of their previous relationships, mostly out of concern for Bella, and Edward hugged her a bit tighter, feeling Jasper do the same as they offered her physical comfort. Edward had a feeling it might be like that for awhile between them, as they progressed through their relationship and tried new things, sexually.

"James was an asshole who didn't deserve you," Edward heard himself say. "He was an abusive bully and he doesn't deserve anymore thought from you. We're not him, like Jasper said. I'd be lying if I said I wouldn't be disappointed if you never wanted to give head ever again, because I'm a guy, and I really like it, and even though Jasper's fantastic at it, I'd still want to have your mouth on me." He could practically hear Jasper's eyes rolling. "But it's your choice," he said, his voice softly as he ran his finger up her bare spine. "We won't force you to do anything you don't want to do. That's not love, sweetheart."

"Yeah," she whispered, trying to muffle a sniffle, which didn't really work.

"Trust us," Jasper said quietly, shifting over to envelop her and Edward at the same time. "I can't promise we'll never laugh at you, but we do love you."

"Love you too," she said quietly.

"Ready for sleep?" Edward asked, stilling his hand on her lower back, just above the swell of her ass. "Or is there something else you'd like?"

Bella laughed softly and Jasper snorted. "Always," Bella answered. "But no, we're tired, and it's going to be a long day tomorrow."

"Okay." Edward shifted out of her grasp and kissed her softly before he climbed from the bed. He shut off the last of the lights and padded naked into the bathroom to take his pills and grabbed a slightly damp cloth for Jasper to clean up with.

The cloth was discarded over the edge of the bed with their clothes, and Edward set the alarm before they fell asleep in a tangled pile of limbs.

"Ugh," Bella groaned, burrowing her face further into Edward's neck when the alarm went off. "I thought we were on vacation," she whined against his skin. "Wanna stay in bed."

Edward felt the bed shift as Jasper moved, draping himself over the both of them. Throughout the night they'd shifted apart slightly.

"We'll find a nice quiet corner of the park for you to take a nap in, darlin'," Jasper promised as the alarm was silenced. He stretched up and kissed Edward softly, silently telling him to stay and snuggle while Jasper took the first shower. The bruise on the back of his thigh was a dark purple line as Jasper's naked back retreated into the bathroom, though he didn't look like he was limping anymore.

"That's not quite what I meant," Bella muttered on a sigh.

Embracing Bella, Edward shifted a big onto his side, and Bella moved with him, cuddling up with a quiet happy sigh. The shower turned on in the background. He kissed her forehead. "We'll try to find a long weekend somewhere soon where we can spend it in bed, sweetheart," he promised. "Have we awoken a monster in you?" he asked, teasing.

She nipped at his exposed collarbone. "No. Well…" she paused. "Maybe a bit?" she admitted. Bella shifted against him, resting her cheek against his chest. "I think that we don't get to spend enough time together like this," she said quietly. "It'll get better," she continued, turning her face to look up at Edward, optimism in her eyes. "It's just hard sometimes."

"Tell me about it," Edward said dryly, making her giggle, which was his goal. "I know what you mean, though, and you're not the only one that feels that way."

She nodded against him. "Does Jasper know we have to chaperone prom?"

"I dunno. What are you thinking?"

"Maybe we could get a hotel room for that Saturday night?" she asked. "Doesn't the Dean normally cancel the campus dinner that week?" Bella's smile was mischievous and Edward lifted his head far enough to kiss her softly.

"I'll see what I can do," he promised.

She smiled again, kissed his chin, then snuggled back down against his chest. The water shut off and Edward gave Bella a nudge. "Your turn in the shower."

Bella 'hrumphed' but sat up, the covers pooling around her waist as she stretched. She was naked as Jasper had been, and her just-better-than-handfuls of breasts bounced as took a deep breath and brought her hands back into her lap with a smirk.

"Go, you evil temptress," Edward said with a laugh, sitting up himself to kiss her. She returned it, then scrambled off the bed as he pinched her sides in an effort to get her moving. Bella jumped when Jasper lightly smacked her ass as she passed him on her way into the bathroom.

Edward pulled himself from the bed and followed her, using the sink while she showered. Bella was quick, and Edward took his turn when she was through. He didn't bother to shave, having a free day where he didn't need to look professional, and he preferred it that way.

Once they were all dressed in Forks Academy gear they assembled downstairs.

"Good morning!" Edward greeted all the students. "Today is a free day in Disneyland. The busses are going to drop us off, so make sure you have everything you need. You'll have three chances to come back to the hotel, at 4pm, 8pm, and midnight when the park closes. One of us will be waiting at the park entrance at those times to escort you back to the hotel. You're on your own today; please have fun, but remember to act responsibly. You should have all of our numbers if you need to call us today. Alright, questions?" There were none. "Let's go, then."

The busses dropped them off near the entrance to the park, and everyone took off to do their own thing. Jasper, Edward, and Bella spent most of the day together, though they did join Alice and Angela for lunch. Despite having been in the park the evening before, Bella was excited to hit the rides again, surprising Edward slightly with her adrenaline seeking in wanting to hit the roller coasters.

Since they'd had the late arrival to the hotel the night before, Angela was returning with the 4pm group, and Alice got the 8pm, leaving Edward, Bella, and Jasper to gather everyone else up when the park closed. The students dragged themselves to the bus once Edward did a final head count (having already gotten totals by text from the two previous shifts).

Back at the hotel he got everyone upstairs fairly quickly, the students too tired to want to do much else. When everyone was secure, Edward and his partners returned to their room. Jasper took off his shoes and crashed, laying face down on the bed and falling asleep almost immediately without changing out of his clothes. Edward was worried that his back was giving him trouble again, but he got up when Bella roused him, moving easily.

Edward changed and sat on the bed with a groan. He was achy and tired, which was to be expected, having spent most of the day on his feet. He was proud of himself, though. He had listened to his body, stopping when he needed to, and he didn't seem to be in an inordinate amount of pain.

"Hey, sweetheart," Bella said, coming over to him in a pair of boxer shorts and a tank top. She had something in her hand. "Strip for me?"

Curious, Edward nodded, rising slowly to slide off his pajama pants, leaving them in a puddle on the floor before taking off his t-shirt and tossing it to the side as he sank back down.

"Lie down and turn over," she guided quietly.

Edward did as she asked after taking his glasses off, and saw the lights go out in the bathroom, and then around the room other than the one over the bed. Jasper climbed into the other side of the bed, kissed Edward, then Bella, and curled up around a pillow.

"I know you've got to be hurting," Bella said softly, her voice soothing as Edward closed his eyes. He heard a bottle cap flip open, and then her small warm hands were on the backs of his legs. He sighed softly. "Jasper said you like this," she continued to speak as she rubbed the lotion into his legs. The massage was gentle, but needed and appreciated, and Edward felt himself relax slightly. "He thought you might need it tonight, but he's so tired," she observed, as their lover's soft snore punctuated the statement. She giggled softly. "So he told me what to do." He felt her lips between his shoulder blades. "Is it right?"

"Mm," Edward hummed affirmatively. He was glad he'd already taken his pain-killers for the night so he wouldn't have to get back up. "Just right, honey. Thank you," he murmured.

"I'm glad Jasper told me," she continued, and he could hear the smile in her voice. "You guys know each other so well, and I feel like we're still learning. I've known you for years, but this is different, y'know? I know your favorite foods, desserts, movies, and your schedule, and all that, but things like this are new to me. I want to be able to take care of you, too, not just be the one that needs to be looked after," she said, and Edward knew she was thinking of the past several weeks. "I know it'll take time," she said, and Edward just let her talk as she worked, slowly feeling the tension seep from his body. "Just like it did for you and Jasper. I just feel like I'm behind."

"It's not a race, Bella," Edward said softly, though he did understand her concern. He and Jasper had a somewhat instinctual knowledge of each other, simply because they'd had longer time together.

"I know," she assured him, kissing his back again lightly as her hands began to slow. "I just want things to be equal, and I feel like I have the most learning to do."

Edward slowly turned onto his back, giving her time to shift up where she knelt over him so he could complete the action. "So do we, though," he answered as she lowered herself back down, resting on her haunches. "We're learning just as much about you as you are us."

Bella kissed him softly on the mouth. "And doing a brilliant job of it, too." She smiled, then shifted off of him, pressing her chest against his side as she lay down between him and Jasper, her thigh between Edward's legs, her head resting on his shoulder. "It's alright," she promised as Edward reached up behind him to turn off the last light in the room. "It's new for all of us," she said drowsily. "So long as we're happy, and talking."

"Just so, sweetheart," Edward whispered. He kissed the top of her head as she snuggled into him slightly. Jasper turned toward them in his sleep and Edward, soothed by Bella's touch and the chemical support he'd taken eventually drifted into a peaceful sleep.

Thursday morning they were back in Disney's hands. The Jazz Ensemble had a workshop late in the morning, and Jasper and Angela went with them while Edward, Alice and Bella went with the Wind Ensemble group into the park to get ready for their performance early in the afternoon, since things were going to be too tight for Edward to be everywhere at once.

The concert went great, and when they were finished, Edward released the students after they'd returned their gear to the busses. He spent another day roaming the park with Jasper and Bella until they met back up with Alice and Angela for an adult's only dinner at the Blue Bayou restaurant. Edward was tempted to relax his no-tolerance policy, but decided against ordering wine for the table, since they were trying to be good examples for the students.

They ordered, and started with small talk as the boats from the Pirates of the Caribbean ride went past.

"So, someone snuck off last night and came back really early this morning," Angela said casually, spearing a tomato with her fork, glancing over at Alice.

"Really?" Bella asked, curious. She shifted in her seat, clearly excited. "Do we need to start applying the blue tape to your door, too?" she teased.

Alice rolled her eyes and sighed. "I am an adult, y'know."

Bella giggled. "Yes, we know," she responded. "So? Spill!" she demanded.

Alice appeared to ignore her for a moment. Edward nudged her under the table and gave her a look. Alice sighed. "I met someone."

"And?" Bella encouraged. Jasper draped his arm somewhat casually over her shoulder, and Edward could see that he was trying to calm her down a bit as she bounced somewhat Alice-like, eager for details.

"She's a doctoral student at Portland State in Public Policy Administration. She's 28, and she's here as part of a family reunion," Alice spelled out quickly.

"Portland's what, five hours from home?" Jasper asked.

"Three, the way Alice drives," Edward corrected quietly while Alice answered "Four and a half."

"Not bad for a weekend," Angela said with a shrug. "Ben and I usually meet in Seattle, Ellensburg, or Yakima to split the eight hour drive to Pullman."

Alice nodded, moving her salad around on her plate. "Yeah," she said quietly. "Look, it's just a fling, okay? Can we drop it?"

"Sure, Alice," Jasper answered quickly, giving Bella's shoulders a squeeze, which told Edward that he'd sensed Bella's probable opposition to that idea. "Y'all ready to get home?"

Bella giggled; every so often, Jasper lapsed into old speech patterns. Edward had teased him about it more than once, and he knew it happened when Jasper was either incredibly comfortable in his surroundings or really tired.

"Yeah," Angela answered. "As nice as it's been to be away, I think I'm ready for my own bed again."

"You mean you don't like sharing with me?" Alice asked, pretending to be affronted.

"You steal the covers," Angela said with a shrug.

Bella laughed. "I know!"

The rest of the meal was filled with laughter. Edward noticed that Jasper covered their tab, but didn't say anything, and neither did the girls, if they had even seen. They left the restaurant together, having a couple more hours in Disney until they had to meet the busses.

Bella decided she wanted to get her shopping out of the way, so Jasper took charge, using Bella's park map to make their way around. Jasper also carried Bella's bags, but Edward made sure he took at least one so he didn't look completely useless. Once Bella had something for everyone on her list, they found another small café area. Bella and Edward ordered dessert and Jasper had coffee, and they chatted, mindful of being in a family oriented environment keeping their hands to themselves, until it was time to meet everyone else at the front gate a couple of hours before closing.

While Edward stretched out on the floor when they returned to the hotel, Jasper seemed more than happy to give Bella a foot rub, which she was not shy about asking for. Edward was happy to hear her ask for something she wanted, rather than hinting or going without. When Jasper was done with Bella, and she was drowsing happily, he turned his attention to Edward and helped work the tension from his legs and lower back. He had a feeling that if not for the quiet observations of his partners, and their caretaking he wouldn't have endured the trip half as well.

As Edward expected, they all found sleep easily; he had a feeling their final night would be much the same. Being on the go for five straight days, even for people as active as he and his partners could be, was tiring.

Friday morning they repeated their routine of rotating through the shower while someone fetched breakfast from the lobby. It was another free day in Disneyland, with the busses picking them up at midnight. They had a chance to see the shows and do all the rides, and when they met all the students at the front gates, Edward was happy to see that they all seemed happily tired. They boarded with their packages of souvenirs and quietly rode back to the hotel. When they arrived, Edward announced that they would have a chance to sleep in. The students (and Bella) met that announcement with cheers.

Once the students had gathered in the lobby with their belongings to wait for the busses Saturday morning, Edward and the rest of the chaperones did a quick tour of the rooms to make sure no one had left anything behind.

The rest of the morning and early afternoon were uneventful. The students seemed relieved to be going home, despite the looming resumption of classes and finals. The busses took them on a tour through L.A. on the way back to the airport.

Like they had in Seattle, Edward turned the students loose for an hour or so before boarding, and they mostly returned straight to the gate after finding snacks or last minute souvenirs of their trip and gathered around to talk quietly or nap.

Also, like they had in Seattle, Edward and Angela asked for special permission to board before the other economy-class passengers. The airline staff was happy to accommodate them, and once the first-class passengers, and those with small kids were aboard, Edward got his students moving down the ramp to the plane.

"I'm gonna need a vacation from this vacation," Jasper muttered as he settled into his seat against the window with a quiet groan. "Gettin' too old for this marathon kinda stuff."

Bella laughed softly and kissed his cheek. "You're not _that_ old."

"Thanks, darlin'," Jasper said dryly. He brushed his lips against her temple. Around them the students were getting settled into their seats after stowing their horns in the overhead bins and pulling out iPods or laptops.

Edward chuckled and stretched his arm behind Bella's head to twine his fingers in the longer hair at the base of Jasper's neck. "I know what you mean, baby." He shifted slightly. Though he was physically feeling stronger than he had in a long time, it had still been a long week.

"We should go for massages," Bella mused, shifting and settling down into her seat, nudging her bag further under the seat in front of her.

"Yes," Jasper agreed immediately.

Bella kissed his cheek. "I'll ask Rose," she promised. "We'll see if we can get them to do a group thing instead of a couple's thing."

"Sounds perfect," Edward acknowledged.

Bella hummed her agreement and pressed her lips lightly to Edward's cheek in response. He took her hand in the space between their seats as the rest of the passengers began filing on.

The flight home was uneventful; Bella napped and Edward and Jasper talked quietly when they weren't reading or listening to music. When they arrived in Seattle the busses were waiting once everyone had gone through the baggage claim.

"Oh, Mr. Cullen, I have something for you," the driver of the lead bus said, handing Edward a note.

"Thanks." Edward took it, puzzled. What he found made him smile.

_Welcome home, son. We know you've had a long week, and that you and the others have to stay on campus tonight. We've set up dinner for you and the students at the pizza place; they're expecting you, so not to worry. We'll see you there. Love, mom and dad._

He pulled out his cell phone and called Angela on the second bus to relay the message before announcing it to his own busload of students. They received the news with a cheer.

Rose, Emmett and his parents were waiting for them at the restaurant. The students, hungry and tired fell into seats after loudly thanking Carlisle and Esme. Edward, Angela, Bella, Jasper, and Alice were relieved to not have to keep watch over everyone and let the rest of them take over for awhile. While Edward still had everyone gathered in the same space he made his final announcements.

"I just want to thank you all for a very good trip," he began. "I was very happy to not have to send anyone home, or take any disciplinary action. We're back on campus tonight, and though we're all in different buildings, I think you all have at least one of us in each building tonight, right?" He glanced at Angela for confirmation.

She nodded. "Only place we don't have one is Lee, but we don't have anyone from that building on the trip."

"Okay, so we're back to regular dorm rules tonight. The rest of the faculty should be back tomorrow by noon, and the dining hall will re-open for dinner. Do any of you need to get supplies to get through the day tomorrow without access to the dining hall?"

About a dozen students raised their hands. "Alright, before we go, I want you all to figure out a representative from each building. Put together a list, and by the time we're ready to leave, we'll have decided who's going to run you all to the grocery story then back to campus. I'll have the music building open so you can put your stuff away if you have a locker. Any questions?"

"I don't have a question, but," Susan said, rising from her seat. "We didn't really have a banquet on this trip, and I have a few things, if that's okay?" she asked. She'd been kind of the de-facto student leader for the trip, and Edward nodded, ceding the floor to her as he took his seat between Bella and Jasper.

"So, it's mostly fallen on me to take care of this," she started, and the other students laughed. "From all of us, I wanted to say thank you to Dr. Swan, Dr. Whitlock, Ms. Brandon and Ms. Weber for accompanying us on this trip. We know you didn't have to, but you made Mr. Cullen's job easier, which makes him a lot easier to deal with."

Everyone laughed at that, and Edward felt his ears heat up a bit at the truth of it, and Bella patted his thigh.

"Anyway," Susan continued. "To say thank you, we got you all a little something. Dr. Swan," she said, handing over a small wrapped package to Bella. She handed packages also to Jasper and Alice. "You can open them later," she said with a grin. "For Ms. Weber," she said brightly, handing over an envelope. "We know you do a lot of work for the department and Mr. Cullen, for all of our trips this year, so thank you."

Angela flushed as she took the envelope, but said a grateful thanks.

"Now, for our director," Susan continued, looking only half serious. "Thank you for taking over for Dr. Anderson this semester. We had some really good trips, and we're sorry that we were all so cranky in Idaho," she said teasingly. "So. Thank you," she said, handing Edward a small box as well.

He stood and hugged her before she went back to her seat, handing his box to Jasper for the moment. "And thank you again to our chaperones," Edward said. "And to you, for doing a fantastic job of representing yourselves and the school," he said to the students.

The students and adults responded with a round of applause.

"Okay, anything else?" Edward asked when the clapping stopped. No one spoke up. "Get your lists put together and figure out who from what building is going shopping." The students started speaking and Edward turned to his brother and parents. "Any volunteers?"

"We'll do it, Edward," Esme responded. "Do any of you need anything?" Emmett and Jasper needed milk for their suite, and so did Bella and Alice. Angela was headed back to her apartment off campus but thanked them for the offer, and Edward had a feeling he'd end up with either Bella or Jasper for breakfast anyway, so he declined. Esme and Carlisle gathered their things and Edward called for the students going to the store. They left in a small group, and Edward and the remaining adults gathered the students back onto the busses for the short ride back to campus, Rose and Emmett following in his Jeep. Edward had already thanked them for cutting their vacation a day short to stay back in the dorms.

When Edward got off the bus he headed straight for the music building to use his card to get inside and set access for those students who had after-hours permission (which were most of his). He didn't need to wait that way, and so went back to where everyone else had gathered. Angela signed off the paperwork for the busses and thanked the drivers while Jasper, Bella, and Alice supervised the offloading.

Once the students had grabbed all their gear, Alice and Bella quickly double checked the busses were empty and gathered the trash that had been left behind.

"Come on, sweetheart, we'll walk you girls home," Jasper said to Bella, Alice, and Rose. Jasper grabbed up her suitcase in his left hand (his and Edward's bag in his right) and Edward took her hand as they followed a short stream of students to their building after saying goodbye to Angela. Emmett took Alice's bag and they went as a group.

Jasper and Edward left Bella with the girls after long, lingering kisses. Edward had a feeling there was going to be a bit more of that separation anxiety he'd experienced with Jasper after the holidays, only a bit worse. He was going from five intense days with his lovers back to his own bed again, and he knew it would be another difficult transition. Once again he made a mental note to strike up a conversation about living arrangements for the summer and following school year sometime soon, or once Jasper knew about the permanent position on campus.

"Yours or mine?" Jasper asked quietly as they left the girl's building.

"Mine," Edward said with a sigh. He was the only faculty member in his building until Sunday, so he would need to stay put, no matter how much he'd rather go to Jasper's and spend time with him (and maybe Emmett).

"I'll meet you back at ours, man," Emmett said to Jasper.

Jasper nodded, and he and Edward started off toward Edward's building.

"You going to be okay, or do you want me to stay tonight?" Jasper asked once they were in Edward's room, the door propped open just a bit.

Edward dropped his bags on his bed and turned back toward Jasper, walking up and wrapping his arms around the other man's waist. Jasper accommodated him with a quiet laugh. "As much as I'd love you to stay, you should probably go to yours," he answered. "Emmett's not officially here, and if he decides to go see Rose…" he trailed off.

"Okay," Jasper answered quietly. He gently tipped Edward's chin up and kissed him softly. "I love you."

Edward smiled. "Love you too, baby."

Jasper kissed him again before stepping back to pick up the suitcase. "I'll bring your clothes by tomorrow. Call me tonight, if…well. I'll probably be up," he said with a grin.

Edward nodded. "Kay."

Jasper leaned over and kissed him one more time before letting himself out.

With a heavy sigh, Edward turned to his bed and the bags he'd dropped there. He fished out his iPod and set it on the dock and got it playing, opening his door a bit further so his students would realize he was in, and got started unpacking his suit bag and messenger bag and trying to get sorted for the upcoming week and his return to the real world again.

* * *

blue tape, or masking tape, has been used by chaperones on every band trip I've ever been on. It removes easily when placed across the door, and it doesn't restick for long, so it's obvious when someone's left a room when they weren't supposed to. That, and it's really hard to stick tape on from the inside of the room for you to get back in. ;)


	54. Chapter 53: Second Date

**Thank you as always to naelany and wishingforlove.**

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Bella had a better understanding of Jasper's post-holiday moodiness after they returned from their week away. She had spent five glorious nights getting to share a bed with her lovers and it had been difficult to go back to her own when they got back – she couldn't imagine what it must've been like for Edward and Jasper to get through it after six weeks.

Thankfully, she'd had enough to do on Sunday to keep her mind immediately occupied. It didn't even really occur to her, until Alice crept into the room and snuggled up at 2 am, why she wasn't sleeping.

"You too, huh?" she asked Alice.

Alice hugged her. "I've missed sleeping next to someone. Even if Ang did accuse me of stealing the blankets."

Bella laughed. "Alice, honey, I hate to break it to you, but you _do_ steal blankets.

Alice 'harumphed' her indignant response. "Well, I guess _you_ won't have to worry about that anymore, hm?"

Bella hadn't really thought about that. "No, I guess not." She wouldn't have to spend vacations sharing a bed with Alice, since she'd have Edward and Jasper's.

"Y'know I'm happy for you all, right? Even if I come across as a little jealous sometimes."

Bella smiled into the dark. "Yeah, Ali, I know. But maybe Rose was right. It's been months since Kate…" she trailed off, biting her lip. Her next thought had been that if she got over James that surely Alice could be over Kate already. But she held her tongue.

"I'm going to see Charlotte in two weeks," Alice whispered.

"Who's Charlotte?" Bella asked, confused.

"I thought maybe you'd come with me? I know you don't want to be away from the boys that long, but we'd be back Sunday afternoon, and I thought maybe if I promised you a trip to Powell's that you might agree and" Alice's speech rolled on like a freight train until Bella finally clapped her hand over Alice's mouth to quiet her.

"Charlotte in Portland?" Bella asked, putting it together when Alice mentioned bribing her with books. "I thought it was just a fling, Alice?" She felt the smaller woman shrug against her.

"I thought so, too," Alice admitted. "But she found me on Facebook and invited me down in two weeks. I really like her, Bella. But I don't want to go by myself."

"I'll talk to Edward and Jasper and make sure we don't have plans _if_," she stressed, blindly poking at the squirmy thing in her bed. "You promise that you'll let me pay for half the hotel, since you won't be there anyway."

"I can live with that," Alice agreed, her voice calmer as she stopped wriggling around and snuggled against Bella. "Thank you."

"Aw, Alice, you know there's very little I can deny you. I love you too much."

"You too, Bells," Alice answered sleepily.

It seemed that with her issue handled, Alice was fast on her way to sleep. Bella as still have convinced she'd never sleep when Alice cuddled a little closer and Bella found herself comforted enough to doze, and then slip into a restful sleep.

When she awoke with her alarm at six-forty in the morning, Bella was alone in bed, which had been completely stripped of her blankets and comforter. "What the hell?" she muttered, then the metaphorical light clicked on. "ALICE!?"

Her impish suitemate appeared in the doorway, giggling, with Bella's bed coverings swaddled around and trailing her like haute couture. "What?" she asked innocently.

Bella just fixed her with a glare as she untangled herself from the lone sheet she'd apparently been trying to use for warmth.

"As long as I'm stealing covers, I thought I should do a thorough job," Alice suggested with a grin and shrug.

Bella finally extricated herself. "Just make sure you get the corners nice and tight when you remake it," Bella said as she grabbed her robe and towel from the hooks.

She pushed past Alice and flicked on the kettle before stepping into the bathroom. When she emerged from a very hot shower that soothed her muscles (but did nothing for the fact she missed Edward and Jasper after only a day), she found that Alice had made her a cup of her favorite tea, and her covers were back on her bed, though it was unmade.

After a quick peek outside and a check of the weather on her laptop, Bella chose her clothes for the day and started to dress. From her closet she pulled a light t-shirt dress that belted around her waist and paired it with a light denim jacket. The weather promised to be clear, so she added a cute pair of matching sandals, knowing she'd be able to stay inside most of the day, since Jasper would get their lunches like usual (she assumed).

She threw her hair up into a bun and secured it with a couple of long sticks before throwing her things into her bag and collecting Alice for breakfast. "Ready?" she asked, poking her head into Alice's side of the suite.

"Just about," Alice answered, stepping into her shoes. When she looked up, she made a face. "Bella, the hair," she sighed.

"I know," Bella answered. "I think I'm going to cut it soon. It's too long and heavy," she explained as Alice lifted her bag. They made their way out through Alice's door.

"Layers," Alice said. "Keep some length, lighten up, frame around your face," she thought aloud. "I think that'd be nice."

Bella nodded. "That's kind of what I was thinking."

"See?" Alice stuck her hand through Bella's elbow and leaned on her slightly. "Great minds and all that."

"Uh-huh," Bella answered with a grin. Alice pinched her side.

When they reached the dining hall they split up to find their meals. Bella was drawn to the fresh pastries that were out and grabbed a blueberry muffin instead of oatmeal, some fruit and a single scrambled egg to go with her tea and small glass of milk. She made her way out after scanning her card and found Jasper and Edward sitting with Emmett and Rosalie at their usual table.

"Good mornin', darlin'," Jasper greeted her, holding out the chair between him and Edward for her.

"Hi," she said taking the seat, smiling softly as Edward kissed her cheek.

"Sleep okay?" Edward asked once she was settled.

Bella shrugged. "Yeah, I guess."

Jasper gave her arm a squeeze and smiled sympathetically, but didn't say anything as he went back to his breakfast. She returned it and focused on her plate, splitting her muffin and smearing it with a bit of butter. It was still warm, and just perfect as the butter melted quickly.

"You didn't call," Edward said quietly, and he sounded slightly hurt.

"Sweetheart," Bella sighed softly. She put her knife down and turned slightly toward him. "As much as I would have loved to have slept over with either one of you," she said, reaching her other hand for Jasper, "I needed to sleep in my own bed, or I'll never be able to go back."

"That's a problem?" Edward asked, and Bella could see that he was only half serious.

Bella laughed softly, hearing Jasper chuckle on her other side. "Yeah, baby, that's a problem," she answered as Alice joined them at the table. "Just for the next two months, though, right?"

"Right," Jasper said. "We'll get things figured out before the end of the school year."

Edward nodded. "Okay. I just don't want you to think you can't call or come over if you can't sleep or anything."

Bella smiled and kissed his cheek quickly. "I know," she assured him. She turned back to her tray and Jasper gave her hand a squeeze before letting go so they could eat.

"Everyone ready to be back to it?" Alice asked.

The responses from everyone were fairly noncommittal. Spring break was always welcome, but the return was difficult, knowing there were still nearly two full months left. The students always came back more restless than they'd been before the break and the instructors all wanted another week to do the prep-work they'd told themselves they'd do while on vacation which never actually got done.

They chatted through the last few minutes of breakfast before classes, and Jasper walked Bella to their office, her arm linked with his elbow. She made another cup of hot tea with a bit of honey in the new mug she'd bought in L.A. before heading to her first class.

The first day back from holidays were always difficult, and Bella thankfully hadn't planned to do anything more strenuous than review. Her literature students had reading assigned over the break, but she gave them another day to finish, letting them discuss up to where they had left off as a class before departing for their week's vacation.

Jasper brought her lunch as usual, but also a surprise in the form of Edward. "Sorry darlin', he followed me back. Can we keep him?" He teased.

Edward shoved him lightly from behind as Bella laughed, and once the door was closed, kissed them both, the lingering contact putting a temporary stop on the slight ache she'd felt since they'd walked her home late Saturday night. In the back of her mind she wondered if she'd ever truly loved James; she'd never felt that way after or while being separated from him for any length of time.

Jasper caressed her cheek lightly when he pulled away, moving across the room to grab the guest chair from his desk so they could all eat together at Bella's, while Edward hung onto her a little longer. When Edward let her go, she cleared space enough on her desk for the three of them to eat from their take-out containers. Jasper had a burger and tater tots from the grill, and Edward had a sandwich with fries. Jasper had brought Bella a Thai chicken wrap with peanut sauce, and a brownie.

They chatted as they ate, and Bella helped herself to some of the fried potatoes on both trays in front of her. "So," she said. "Alice has asked me to go to Portland with her in two weeks," she said.

"Any particular reason?" Jasper asked, rising.

Bella grinned. "Seems like that fling may be slightly more than that," she responded. "Her name is Charlotte, and she invited Alice down. Alice didn't want to go on her own, and I said I'd go, if we didn't have plans."

"You don't have to ask us," Edward chided her gently. "If you want to go, just say so. Or not, and we'll make excuses for you to keep the hyper one off your back," he said with a wink.

Bella nodded. The habits she'd developed in her relationship with James were hard to break.

"I'm on call that weekend," Jasper said from his desk, having moved to look at his calendar. "So I'm stuck here, no matter what other plans get made."

"So, it's up to you, really, love, if you want to go," Edward said. "It'll mean a trip to Powell's probably, right?"

Bella rolled her eyes at his teasing tone. "Yes, probably."

"Go and have a good time, darlin'," Jasper said with a hint of encouragement in his voice. "Think of it as a mini vacation. See if you can get Alice to put you up someplace with a spa so you can get a bit of pamperin' in while she's off having fun," he said with a grin. "Especially since you had to work so hard over Spring Break."

"Yeah, that guy was a slave driver, wasn't he?" She asked rhetorically.

"I'm in the room, guys," Edward said with a shake of his head, and Bella and Jasper just laughed. Edward glanced at his watch. "I need to run. I'll see you both at dinner. Go with Alice if you want, love. I'm sure I can find a way to occupy myself and Jasper." He rose and kissed her softly, then Jasper, and showed himself out.

Jasper gathered their trash and dumped the containers in the bin near the door. He came back and took over Edward's seat at the corner of Bella's desk where she was still picking at her brownie. When he didn't say anything for a moment, she asked him. "What?"

He took her hand across her desk. "You're your own woman, Bells. You don't need our permission to do anything, y'know," he said, quietly sincere. He was worried; she could see it in his eyes. "If you feel like you have to ask us before you do things, will you tell us, please? I don't want our relationship to go that way."

She twined their fingers together. "I promise," she said quietly. She hoped she could keep it. Bella knew that neither of them wanted to control her, and that Jasper in particular would be extremely damaged, emotionally, if it happened. The worry in Jasper's eyes eased a bit and he half-rose from his seat and kissed her softly, before dragging his chair back to his desk and finished up his prep for his afternoon classes.

The rest of Bella's afternoon went quickly and without any significant problems. By the end of classes she was tired, and she waved Jasper (and one of his students) goodbye as she went to check on the yearbook group. They had one final week to get the layout complete and get the book sent off to be printed and bound. The students were nearly done, but they were waiting for pictures from spring breaks and for a few more clubs to have their official group pictures done. Bella promised that she'd bring cookies on their final meeting a week from Thursday since it would be a late night, and made a note to ask Esme if it was alright if she used the kitchen the Wednesday before after therapy.

Bella nearly accepted Alice's invitation to go to Portland over dinner, but held her tongue until they were back in their suite; she didn't know how much Alice might have told Rosalie and Emmett, and rather than ruin that for her, she decided to wait. Once Alice had hugged her in thanks, Bella changed into a pair of ratty sweatpants and one of Edward's hoodies and curled up in a corner of her bed (remade with corners as tight as she liked them) with the in-class writing assignments for the day, occasionally getting distracted by something going on in the messenger window she kept open on her laptop.

The rest of the week went well. After Monday, the students settled back into their routines and everything went back to more or less normal. In return for her taking off to Portland, she asked Jasper and Edward to keep Saturday open, and spent part of her free time that week planning a date day on Saturday, making sure that they were back in time for the family dinner.

Friday night after dinner, Jasper and Edward walked Bella home. She kissed them both, reminded them to be up early and at her car at six the next morning, and to wear comfortable clothes, but to pack a small bag with a "better than casual" shirt for her afternoon plans, and clothes for Sunday, not wanting to give anything away. Edward whined and Jasper shushed him, promising he could sleep in the car, since there had to be a reason they were up that early. Bella just grinned and shooed them out of her room.

Once they were gone, Bella opened a bottle of wine from the small rack Alice kept on their kitchenette counter, poured a glass and drew herself a bath. Alice had gone to her studio space after dinner, so Bella was alone in the suite. Before she submerged herself in the water she dragged her smaller iPod speaker into the bathroom and cracked her door open, scrawling a note on her board, letting the girls on her floor know where she was.

Bella soaked until the water started to cool, then took the time to carefully shave before pulling the stopper on the tub and rinsing off under the shower, leaving her hair for her morning shower. She refilled her wine glass before she went back into her room and closed and locked the door to change. Once she was dressed, she opened her door again, since she was the only one on the floor, and settled down to read one of her guilty pleasure novels. Knowing that Tanya was on call in the suite she shared with Rose on the floor below, Bella took a quick lap around the rooms on her floor before she turned out her light, excited about her plans with Jasper and Edward the next day.

Despite her excitement, sleep found Bella easily, and she woke with her alarm once again at the ungodly hour of what Charlie used to call the colon of dawn ("It's even too early to be the butt-crack of dawn, Bells" he'd once said). Still, she roused herself and for the second time in less than twelve hours she was in the shower, washing her hair and lathering up with her body wash for good measure. Wrapped in her robe and towel she peeked into Alice's room to see if she'd come home from her studio, to see that her bed was made and looked unslept in. Bella frowned, but shrugged it off; she'd probably gone to Esme and Carlisle's if she hadn't worked clear through the night.

Bella pulled her hair back into a comfortably loose French braid so that it was out of her face for the day, but still looked nice. The braid ended about half-way down her back, and she needed two ties to make sure it was secure. She knew she was blessed with her thick mane, but sometimes she wished she'd just get up the guts to cut it already. A pair of her dressiest jeans were paired with layers of shirts, in case it got warm while they were outside, and she pulled a sweater from her bureau and set it next to her purse and the small bag she'd bundled a crochet project into for the ferry ride. She pulled her duffel bag from its place under the bed and packed up clean clothes for Sunday, since they'd be spending their regular Saturday night at the Cullens'. She placed her sweater on top, zipped it up and tossed it over her shoulder.

When she reached her car, Edward and Jasper were waiting, Jasper holding two bags and Edward looking slightly dazed. "Good morning," she greeted them quietly.

"Mornin'," Jasper returned, his voice still sleep-rough, making his accent slightly more pronounced. He took her bags as she fumbled to open the trunk.

"Morning, Bella," Edward answered, blinking sluggishly.

She couldn't help but giggle. "How long have you been up?" she asked as Jasper loaded their bags into the car.

"Half an hour?" Edward shrugged.

"Awhile," was all Jasper would say.

She kissed both of their cheeks and chivvied them toward the doors. "First stop, Starbucks," she declared.

"It's your show, sweetheart," Edward responded, moving to the shotgun position while Jasper slid into the back.

"Jazzy, how come you always take the backseat?" Bella asked as she got in and started the car. She normally would've asked one of the guys to drive, but she was trying to keep her plans secret as long as possible.

She saw him shrug in the rearview mirror as she backed out of her parking space. "I dunno," he answered. "It seems more polite to let you have the front seat when Edward's driving, and I guess it gives Edward more leg room."

"Your legs are longer, babe," Edward responded, his head tipped back against the seat already.

"But it's not as big a deal for me to need to stretch out, either," Jasper countered. "Honestly, it's not something I do consciously. I hadn't even really thought about it."

Bella smiled at him in the mirror and he returned it. It was a short ride to Starbucks and they piled back out. Her boys insisted that she order first, and she made them add their orders to hers, telling them they'd better get breakfast if they wanted it, because that stop wasn't on her itinerary. "It's my turn to pay," she insisted. "Second date, remember?"

They glanced at each other, probably trying to do the same math that Bella had to realize that this was only their second real date. "Alright," Jasper said slowly.

When they moved over to wait for their drinks, Bella felt Edward's arms go around her waist and his cane thump lightly against her shin as his chin rested lightly on top of her head. "Hey," he said quietly.

"Hey," she answered, relaxing back into his embrace slightly.

Jasper chuckled quietly where he stood next to her and Edward, and Bella reached back for his hand.

"What're we doing today?" Edward asked.

"Dunno," Bella answered, biting her lower lip. "Thought we'd drive around until we figured something out," she teased.

"Bel-la," Edward whined.

"Ed-ward," she whined right back. Jasper just continued to laugh softly next to them, clearly amused by the exchange.

"Aren't you curious?" Edward turned to Jasper.

"Sure," Jasper answered with another lazy shrug. "But it's the lady's day, and she'll tell us when she's ready, right?"

"Right," Bella said with a firm nod, shifting out of Edward's arms just long enough to kiss Jasper quickly, paying no heed to who might be watching. "Trust me, Edward?"

"I do, love," he answered, hugging her again as the barista called their names. They gathered their cups and paper baggies with their pastries and climbed back into the car.

Bella hooked her iPod up to the auxiliary cable she left in the center console and called up her 'road trip' playlist before she pulled back onto the road. The sounds of rustling paper bags disrupted the music for the first few minutes, but they mostly sipped and munched quietly for the first fifteen minutes or so of the trip, until Edward took notice of where they were going.

"Port Angeles?" He asked with a small frown.

"Kinda," Bella answered, not giving anything away. "Patience, grasshopper."

It was the first time the three of them had shared a longer car ride, and once the caffeine and nourishment began to absorb into their systems, both Edward and Jasper perked up slightly, and Bella turned the music down so they could talk. They caught up a bit on their lives in general; Bella was always surprised at how much of each other's lives they missed out on by really only sharing a couple of meals every day. She was ready to have that sense of family that she'd had in high school; even though it'd been only her and Charlie, she knew she wasn't alone at night in their small house on the Res because it had been home. Though her suite with Alice was the closest she'd come in awhile, it still wasn't the same.

"Can I ask you guys something?" Bella asked quietly when they were about half-way to Port Angeles.

"Of course you can, darlin'," Jasper said from the back seat.

"What's going to happen this summer? Or next year?" She asked.

"How do you mean?" Edward asked, and she glanced over to see his brow furrow.

"Well…Edward, you and I usually stay with your parents," Bella said. "And I know that they've accepted us and everything, but…" she paused. "What about our privacy? Do we escape to a hotel every weekend? Do we just continue to share Edward's childhood room and a bed that's still a size too small?" Her voice was soft, but she knew that they both heard her. "I know it's only been a couple months for us, but I was just thinking about how long it's been since I've had a place that I can call home, and how we never seem to have the space and privacy we want unless we're paying for it."

"Well, I don't know about the summer, though we should talk about that," Edward answered, and Bella felt his hand on her thigh. "But the fall will depend on whether or not Jasper gets offered or accepts the full time position in the History department, and if the board decides that I've fulfilled the role of Director of Bands decently enough to keep the job for next year, not that they'd ask me to leave if I haven't," Edward said.

"And if Jasper doesn't get the job?" Bella's voice sounded small even to her own ears. She didn't want to think about what could possibly happen if Jasper didn't continue working at the school.

"Then Jasper figures out what to do in or near Forks so he can stay close to his family," Jasper answered. "If they offer me the job, I'm going to take it, so don't worry about that," he assured them, and Bella had known that. She was just worried that the board would find some reason to not offer him the job. "I've told Edward this before, but as much as I love teaching, if I have to figure out something else, I will. I have other options."

"The board will be meeting at the beginning of May," Edward said, his thumb making small circles near the seam of Bella's jeans on the inside of her thigh. "We'll know in a couple weeks what the fall semester will look like. What would you like to do this summer?" he asked.

"I love your family, Edward, you know that," Bella started with the disclaimer. "Your parents have been nothing but wonderful to me since I've known them, and your brother has adopted me, but sometimes-"

"They can be a bit much," Edward finished dryly. Jasper chuckled quietly in the back seat. "So, you don't want to stay there this summer?"

"I don't know," Bella said with a sigh. "What options do we have?"

"We could see if anyone's looking for someone to house-sit for the summer?" Jasper suggested.

"We can try," Edward answered. "Or maybe a vacation home further up the coast?" he suggested. "Close enough we could still make weekly dinners with the family, but far enough to have some privacy and enjoy our vacation."

"That may be more workable," Bella said. "And it appeals a bit more than spending the time in someone else's house. Not to mention, I doubt anyone around here is taking off for the full vacation, meaning we'd have to move around a lot." She took one hand off the wheel for a moment to still Edward's hand; his touch was becoming more than slightly distracting as his hand had drifted further up her thigh, probably unconsciously.

"How about we look into that for the summer, darlin'?" Jasper asked. "And we can deal with the more long term future when we have a better idea of what will happen?" His hand brushed her shoulder.

She nodded. "Okay."

"Okay," Edward agreed. "Is there anything else while you've got a captive audience?" he asked, his tone teasing, but the question serious.

"Uhm. Ye-ah," Jasper said, drawing out the second word slightly. "Am I the only one that feels slightly like a multiple personality?" he asked. "I mean – we kind of have two lives, y'know? The one that the school and public sees, which is Edward and I, which is accepted enough, and the one that only our family knows, which is the three of us. Am I the only one that that feels like we have a public and private persona and have to check that at the door every time we go out together?"

"No, baby, you're not, and you're not the only one that's noticed, either. When we were in San Francisco after New Year's, I noticed how much more open you seemed, because we were in a place where no one knew us. It was the same while we were in L.A. last week, except when we were around the students," Edward observed. "But I've thought about it, too."

"Me too," Bella agreed, catching Jasper's eyes in the mirror. "I don't know what to do about it, though."

"I hate having to hide things," Jasper continued. "And it's unfair to you, Bells."

Bella shrugged. "That doesn't matter to me."

"Why not?" Edward asked, sounding truly curious.

She took a moment to put her thoughts together and the soft music filled the silence before she started speaking again. "I don't need public acknowledgment of my relationship to validate it," she finally stated. "All that's important to me is that I have a family who loves me and accepts my relationship with my partners."

"So that'd be a no on marriage, then?" Edward asked.

"Not necessarily," Bella answered. "I love the idea of a ceremony that shows my family how committed to a relationship I am," she said. "What I don't need is the government putting their stamp of approval on it, though I can't deny the benefits, and if I were in a more conventional relationship, I might not hesitate to accept a proposal for exactly those reasons if I was ready to spend the rest of my life with someone.

"What I mean is that it's not important to me if the students, faculty, or staff knows about our relationship. It i_is_/i important that we keep our jobs, only because Carlisle was right, and if we come out with our relationship in the wrong way or time, it would be hard for us to get jobs as teachers anywhere else."

"But do we need them?" Jasper asked quietly, interrupting. "You've got a successful writing career, and I don't need to worry about money, well, ever, quite frankly. Edward could still teach lessons to open minded folk, and we could be happy, maybe, even if we didn't teach. I'd go slightly mad without having something to do," he said lightly, coaxing a smile from both Bella and Edward, "but it wouldn't be the end of the world if it meant we got to live a peaceful life together."

"I'm sure we could deal with it, if it happened," Bella answered. "But what I was going to say, getting back to Jasper's bigger question is that we're not always out as the three of us. Sometimes it's me and Edward, and sometimes me and Jasper, and sometimes you two together," she explained. "And what 'm more worried about is someone starting a rumor that I'm splitting you up, or that you're cheating on each other with me, or something that damages your reputations."

"Because being a sexual deviant isn't going to be damaging?" Edward asked, one of his eyebrows arched.

"What the fuck, Edward?" Jasper asked, clearly upset by the question with the tone he used.

"It's what parents are going to say to the board when our relationship gets out," Edward said softly. "And you know it's going to, whether we need or want it to or not, and we're going to have to be prepared for what people are going to say about us."

"I wish I could say that didn't matter, but it does," Bella agreed, knowing she didn't have a thick enough skin to have to endure any of that, which was part of why she was glad Jasper had broached the topic.

"And I think that it's not so much at school that we have to worry, but when we're out in public where we could be seen by the students or other faculty," Jasper said. Bella got the feeling he was trying to avoid addressing Edward's statement. "I don't want to say that we can't go out together, or that we can't touch or otherwise be affectionate if we're having a meal off campus, or we go shopping or whatever. And I know we're mostly being careful, but do we need to set guidelines for ourselves. When do we get to be ourselves and when do we have to pretend?" he asked, and Bella wasn't sure if that was a rhetorical question or not. "I don't even like having to think about asking that question," Jasper admitted. "But unfortunately we have to think about this, because of our roles in the world."

"We could always just resign," Edward said, sounding more serious than not. "Find private sector work, at least on my part, where our lifestyles wouldn't come into question. Bella could keep writing and set up a small shop for her yarn and stuff, and you could find that hobby to keep busy, baby," Edward said. "It's always an option, though not one we have to necessarily consider right now. But if it comes to that, we can take the decision out of the Board's hands."

"Point," Bella agreed. "But I think Jazzy's right; we just need to watch ourselves when we're out where students or faculty could see us. Today, for example, we'll probably be okay, like we were in L.A., at least in the park when we were on our own. I don't like having to hide, either," she consoled them. "But until we can get that place called 'home' settled down, and we have to figure out how to get time together, it's going to be difficult."

"So, we take date night out of town, when we can, we'll find a vacation home to rent out of town for the summer, and deal with things as they come," Edward summarized. "We'll just have to keep being careful for awhile around the students, and take it easy when we're in town, which isn't that hard, since we're really not huge PDA people," he pointed out.

"True," Jasper responded as Bella signaled to change lanes as she approached the exit for Port Angeles. "We just need to remember to keep talking to each other," he said. "I know sometimes we don't have all the time we need, but I think it's going to be important, especially with so many thoughts and feelings to consider between all three of us."

"You're right," Edward agreed. "Does that help, sweetheart?" His thumb was back to making circles against the inside of her thigh again.

"Yeah, it does," Bella said, easily navigated her way through Port Angeles to the ferry dock.

"We're going to Canada?" Jasper asked, his voice closer than Bella had expected. He'd leaned forward between the two front seats.

"Yup," Bella answered. "You both missed the trip we took this fall, so I thought we could spend this morning and early afternoon in the gardens, and then have a slightly late lunch at the Empress for tea before we head home. Esme expects us a little later and will hold dinner," she explained, slightly nervous about how they'd take her plans.

"Sounds perfect, darlin'." Jasper kissed her cheek and settled back in his seat.

"It does sound like a really good day," Edward agreed, and Bella felt her nerves settle.

Bella paid and carefully drove onto the ferry. "I can't stay in here," she confessed as she unbuckled her seatbelt once the car was securely parked. "I'll get too claustrophobic. Let's wander?"

"Sure," Edward agreed. Jasper echoed him and they climbed from the car, careful of the close quarters. Jasper peered around, locating the entrance to the stairs that would put them up on deck, then took Bella's hand and started leading her (and Edward, who'd taken Bella's other hand) toward it. They slowed as they took the stairs, keeping pace with Edward, and Bella took a deep breath when they arrived on the open deck. She'd always enjoyed spending time the water; even with as much as it rained in Washington State in general and Forks in specific, she thought everything on the water just smelled cleaner and fresher.

None of them had thought to bring jackets, and though Jasper seemed unaffected, Edward tugged Bella against his chest after they reached the railing and wrapped his arms around her waist. She welcomed the warmth of him against her back, the morning a bit more chilly than she'd anticipated. Edward's hands slipped under her shirts, the view of it obscured to other passengers because they were facing out to sea. She tipped her head back against this shoulder and he kissed her temple, looking for all the world like a couple out with a friend.

Bella reached for the nearest of Jasper's hands and he took hers, twining their fingers together. His thumb caressed over her wrist while Edward's fingers warmed under her shirts, dancing little patterns against her skin. They were anonymous on the ferry, and with their recent conversation dancing in her head, Bella pulled Jasper closer and kissed him softly.

She was still more than half-way to turned on by Edward's caresses to her thigh earlier, and his continued strokes against her stomach weren't helping, especially when he began kissing the exposed skin along the column of her neck. Normally, the attention in public would have put her off, especially since her hair was pulled back out of her face, not allowing for any concealment, but that the moment, she didn't care as much.

"Edward," Jasper said quietly, his thumb still moving over the soft skin at the inside of Bella's wrist. The touch normally would've been innocent under other circumstances.

"Hm?" The vibration of Edward's hum through his lips against Bella's neck sent a shiver down her spine, and his arms tightened momentarily around her waist.

"If you're thinking what I think you're thinking we should probably move away from the railing and find somewhere a bit more secluded," Jasper suggested.

"How do you know what I'm thinking?" Edward asked, teasing, his warm breath a contrast to the cool skin on his nose as he nuzzled Bella lightly below and behind her ear.

"You're not being as subtle as you think you are," Jasper responded, letting Bella's hand go to wrap his arm around Edward's waist, taking Bella's hand again with his left crossing over his body.

"Okay." Edward hugged Bella close again then released her, taking her free hand instead. Bella watched, amused as he glanced around, then tugged them toward an alcove. Bella giggled as she stumbled after him, Jasper trying to steady her under Edward's determined power.

Edward nudged her up against the bulkhead and kissed her deeply, Jasper coming to a stop alongside them. Jasper faced them as they faced each other, and she felt him release her hand but contact wasn't broken as he wrapped an arm low around her waist, steadying her as she returned Edward's kiss. Jasper's hand slipped into the waistband of her jeans and he teased her with light touches along her tailbone, fingers skirting under her panties.

It normally would take a lot more foreplay for Bella to be ready for any act of intimacy, but the trill of fear that they could be seen got her adrenaline going, which only helped to heighten the arousal that Jasper and Edward were coaxing from her body. She felt herself eagerly respond to their touches and kisses.

Edward cupped her face in his hands as he kissed her. When he broke the kiss, his hands trailed down her neck and shoulders, tracing down her arms until he reached her waist. With a cheeky grin, his hands slid toward the button her jeans as he kissed her again. "Remember what we were saying about that public and private life?" he said quietly in a low voice against her lips. "No one will notice us out of the way here," he continued, his lips trailing over her jaw. "We can be whoever we want, and no one will ever know," he breathed.

Bella wanted to protest, but before a sound could escape, Jasper's lips were near her ear and he was speaking lowly to her as Edward's fingers worked the button of her jeans. "No one can see you, darlin'. We wouldn't let that happen. Trust in us, okay? If you really don't want this, we'll stop, but that's not it, is it?" he asked, scraping his teeth lightly over her earlobe and she shuddered.

"No," she whispered. "I just don't – oh, god," she whispered as Edward got her pants open and slipped his hand inside, his fingers brushing against the soft skin hidden by her panties. "I don't want – want to get caught." Her breath caught as she spoke, Edward's fingers dipping lower in her already damp underwear and she fleetingly thought she was a fucking genius for packing extra panties.

"Just relax, sweetheart. No one can see what we're doing." Jasper was slightly shielding her body, standing with his chest against her flank, and one of his hands slipped under her tops, his long fingers dancing along the skin of her torso, stopping against the underwire of her bra. She wanted to urge him on, make him go higher, but she held her breath as Edward slipped a finger into her and her legs slid farther apart on instinct, the action hidden from the rest of the passengers with Edward's chest pressed against her.

"If we do this again, you should wear a skirt," Edward breathed before kissing her deeply.

Bella hear a quiet noise of agreement and she wasn't sure if it was from Jasper, whose lips were on her neck, or herself as she returned Edward's kiss, breathless and wanting. If he left her hanging she was going to – oh. That thought went right out of her head as he crooked his finger inside of her. She could feel the cool steel of the ship against her back, and she thought she might have bruises from the rivets, but all she was focused on was the way Edward was making her feel.

"Do you know you gorgeous you look like this?" Jasper asked her quietly, his hand back down around her belly button, his hand brushing against Edward's wrist as well. "Have you ever watched yourself in a mirror, darlin'? You're such a lovely shade of pink," he described as Bella bit back a whimper as Edward's hand shifted and a second finger entered her. She tried to close her legs, desperate to seek more friction against the fingers that penetrated her, but Edward thwarted her, pressing his knee between her thighs instead, so she ground down slightly, trapping his fingers between her body and his own leg.

"I know proper ladies don't sweat, my mama taught me well on that one," Jasper continued, the drawl in his voice more exaggerated, which only fueled Bella's inner fire. "But you practically glow like this, when our hands are on you," he said. "When you're nude as the day you were born, the color creeps all the way down, and someday, when we have a bit more privacy than we've been afforded lately, I'm gonna follow that blush with some luscious body paint and my tongue, and I'm going to show you just how beautiful and special you are to me."

Bella had turned her head slowly toward Jasper as he spoke and he punctuated his little speech with a deep kiss, his tongue sliding against hers as Edward found her clit with his thumb, and she whimpered and wobbled, even braced against the ship, as Edward's mouth found the hollow at the base of her throat and he lightly kissed there. She could feel Jasper's hardness against her hip, and Edward's at her belly, and that only made her shift _again_ and try to press herself against Edward's fingers and thigh _again_ in an attempt to seek the release her body was already craving. She felt at once powerful knowing they got as turned on pleasuring her as when she did them, and vulnerable for the setting they were in, knowing they could get caught at any moment. But the thrill of that same vulnerability made it all the more exciting and she tried to push the thoughts away as she tried to focus on Jasper's words and Edward's fingers and not how harsh her breathing sounded against the chugging of the ships engines.

Thoughts slipped from her mind completely as Jasper broke the kiss, his lips lazily drifting over her jaw and up toward her ear again, his hand slipping farther up her shirt. His left hand remained braced on the ship, as if he was just leaning their casually, while the other cupped Bella's breasts in turn, his thumb tracing over her satin-covered nipples, which only helped to heighten the sensation. Her fingers clutched at Edward's hips as he shifted his stance, and she closed her legs against his thigh. She was so fucking close, she could feel her release just out of reach, hot and coiled low in her belly. Bella shifted her hips forward as Edward thrusted his fingers back into her as his thumb pressed on her clit. Once, twice more she moved with him, and just as she felt that she might noisily explode from lust all over the deck, Edward's lips crashed to hers and he swallowed the whimpersob when she finally came, her legs turning to jelly as the sensation washed through her. She felt strong hands at her back, keeping her upright, but she knew it couldn't be Edward, because she could still feel his fingers inside of her.

When she opened her eyes, Edward was looking down at her, like the cat that got the canary. He kissed her, more tenderly, and withdrew his hand, while Jasper rubbed lazy circles into the base of her spine with his hand. She returned Edward's kiss, then turned to Jasper, who chuckled softly as he acquiesced with her silent demand and kissed her, as well. While Edward was still in front of her, she quickly rebuttoned her pants and adjusted her shirts, and she had a feeling that if it weren't for the pink stain she could feel across her cheeks, she might be able to get away with no one else knowing that she'd just been finger-fucked by one of her lovers in front of a whole shipful of tourists.

"As much as I would love to wear your scent all day," Edward said quietly, not so surreptitiously adjusting himself in his jeans. "I need to find a washroom."

"Is that the only reason?" she teased quietly, accidentally on purpose brushing her hand against both of their groins as she pushed off the bulkhead she'd been leaning on. Twin hisses met her ear, and she bit her lip against the grin that burst forth. Each of her boys took a hand and they started walking, albeit slowly, back toward the main cabin, and the restrooms.

"Yes," Edward answered lowly, but his eyes were dark and his voice was thick, and if it took him longer than 30 seconds in the bathroom, she wouldn't be surprised.

"And let that go to waste?" she asked as they moved.

Jasper shrugged on her other side. "It'll come back," he said with a wink down at her, which made her giggle. He bent down close. "They like you," he whispered, as if confessing a deep dark secret which just made Bella burst out laughing.

The laughter on top of the orgasm induced euphoria just left her feeling more relaxed than she had any right to be, and after Edward ducked into the washroom and emerged less than a minute later, they found three seats together in the mild weather outside and sat close, enjoying the rest of the 90 minute crossing. Bella thought to have packed her camera and she snapped a few pictures over the water and of the land in the distance. She got a great one (she thought) of the mountains against the water. As they got closer to Victoria Island she was able to get some pictures of the Legislature Buildings.

When the announcement was made that they should go back to their cars, Bella allowed Jasper to help her from the seat and they went back to the car hand in hand.

Bella followed the queue of vehicles that exited the ferry. "Jazzy, in my purse are the directions I need," she said. She heard him rustle around and then saw him hand Edward the paper out of the corner of her eye. Edward played navigator as she drove through Victoria toward Butchart Gardens.

She paid their admission, knowing that if her partners had any idea of how much the whole day actually cost they'd protest even further that she was paying for everything. But she had a plan and she was determined to see it through, and honestly, it wasn't like she couldn't afford it. She knew she lived modestly, well within the means of her salary from the school, but Renee and Charlie's life insurance policies hand helped her set up decent investments that had only been furthered by the revenue from her books, and she got a draw from those accounts every couple of months, too.

It was just after ten-thirty in the morning when they entered the gardens and the day was clear, if not quite warm. Bella had made reservations for tea at the Empress at 2:30, knowing they had to be back on the 4:00 ferry to make it back to Forks to meet the others for their regular Saturday dinner, though Esme was prepared to hold dinner if Bella called and told her they would be late.

They spent their morning leisurely strolling the gardens. They lingered in the Japanese garden and the Sunken Garden longer than anywhere else, and Bella took plenty of pictures of both the flowers and her guys enjoying themselves, free of worry about being seen together, and also just basking in the sunshine of the day. Jasper did take her camera at one point; she hadn't wanted to give anything away by telling them to bring theirs.

Bella changed into her sweater for tea in the parking lot of the gardens, quickly stripping out of her layers of t-shirts and pulling the sweater on over a camisole. Jasper didn't need to change, but Edward rapidly swapped his long sleeved t-shirt for a polo that he tucked into his jeans.

At the hotel, Bella checked them in for their reservation, and they were promptly seated. Their late lunch was fantastic. They were treated to fresh fruit with cream and raisin scones with cream and jam. They had five different finger sandwiches to choose from, and Bella felt slightly exposed, but also very pleased as Jasper and Edward would tempt her with bites from their fingers. She wasn't bold enough to try it for herself, but they seemed happy to spoil her slightly. The tea was delicious, and Jasper even sampled each of the various pastries, finding a couple he liked, but shuffling those that were too sweet for his tastes onto Bella or Edward's plate.

The conversation stayed light as they ate and sipped their tea, and Bella just generally enjoyed herself. Jasper excused himself while Bella settled their check and she and Edward sat talking quietly until he returned, a small shopping bag bearing the hotel logo in hand, and he just grinned and shook his head when she asked.

"Are you okay to drive home, darlin'?" Jasper asked as they got back in the car and Bella handed Edward the directions back to the ferry from the hotel.

"I should be," she promised. "If we don't get up to any more fun and games on the ferry ride home," she teased.

"We'll be gentlemen," Edward promised.

"Oh, you were perfect gentlemen this morning," she quipped. Jasper laughed softly in the backseat. "I'm okay," she promised.

On the ferry ride back across to Port Angeles, they found seats within the gallery, since the weather had turned dark late in the afternoon, and they weren't properly dressed to enjoy the ride in the rain. They got hot drinks in the cafeteria on board and curled up together to watch the weather and the water while they talked a bit more about their plans for the summer. Jasper wanted to travel a bit, and Bella and Edward promised to set aside two weeks for a road trip, and he kissed them both in thanks.

When they arrived back in Port Angeles, Bella asked Edward to call his mom and let her know they were on their way and on time. Music filled the drive and Bella smiled softly as Jasper's light snore mingled with the music as he dozed. She wondered how truthful his statement from that morning had been about his being up 'for awhile.' With Jasper, that could have meant anything.

The Cullen home was brightly lit when they arrived just before six-thirty. Jasper woke when Bella shut off the engine after pulling up behind Emmett's jeep in the street. "Hey, Jazzy," she said, smiling at him in the mirror. "Nap well?"

"Hm," he said with a nod, scrubbing his hands over his face. "Sorry."

"Don't worry about it," Edward said, looking over his shoulder as he unfastened his belt.

Bella released her seatbelt and slid from the car with a quiet groan as she stretched, feeling her back pop in a couple of places. Jasper went around to the trunk for their bags, since they'd be staying over, and she walked to the door hand in hand with Edward.

"Thank you for a fantastic day, sweetheart," Jasper said, kissing her softly before they went inside. Edward echoed the sentiment and the kiss, then let them in, calling out to the rest of the family.

* * *

The second half of this chapter will post next week.

For this chapter, I'm pretending that all you need to enter Canada and get back into the US is a valid driver's license, because it would ruin the surprise if Bella told them to bring their passports.

I'll put a link to the Butchart Gardens photo gallery on the blog, as well as some images from the ferry from the company's website.

**Show me a Garden won 3 awards at Jasper's Darlins' "Everything's Bigger in Texas" contest: Those Glasses are Hawt (Geeksper), Best All-Human, and Best Overall Slash. Thanks to everyone who voted to show their love for this story.**


	55. Chapter 54: The Little Things

**thanks, as always, to naelany for her awesome beta skills.**

**please see note at the end. ;)**

* * *

Sometimes It's the Little Things

"Thank you for a fantastic day, sweetheart," Jasper said, kissing Bella softly before they went inside. Edward echoed the sentiment and the kiss, then let them in, calling out to the rest of the family.

"It's about time," Emmett said by way of greeting. "I'm starving."

"Yeah, cause you're going to waste away to nothing," Rosalie said with a roll of her eyes. "How was the trip?"

"Great," Edward answered. "The gardens were beautiful and it was all around a good day."

"Dinner's in ten!" Esme called.

"I'm going to take our bags up and wash up," Jasper said, kissing Bella and Edward before heading for the stairs.

Bella flopped down into the chair that Alice was curled up in and threw her legs across Alice's lap.

"Nice to see you too, Bella," Alice said dryly, shoving Bella's legs off.

"Spoilsport," Bella mumbled, pulling her legs back up to her chest, her feet resting on the cushion.

"Boys, come set the table!" Esme called from the kitchen again.

Emmett muttered, but followed Edward into the kitchen. Jasper came back downstairs, the sleeves of his sweater rolled up to his elbows, and in socked feet. He joined Rosalie on the couch and stretched his legs out in front of him.

"Tired?" Rosalie asked him quietly.

Jasper nodded. "Coming up on the long part of the semester," he said. Bella had a feeling that was only part of what was probably keeping him from sleeping.

Rosalie agreed, and Esme called them to the table for dinner.

Esme had gone full traditional Sunday supper for their Saturday meal together, having made a meatloaf with mashed potatoes, glazed carrots and salad. They talked about the schedules for the next few weeks. Bella had the final yearbook committee meeting coming up, Alice had been asked by the students to help plan the "Day on the Green" event that happened at the end of the semester, and Edward was pulling music to work for the graduation ceremony. Jasper had a final swim meet over Memorial Day weekend, and Rosalie was the prom committee advisor. Only Emmett, it seemed had nothing major coming up, and Bella figured that was because he'd had football in the fall.

"Oh, we'll need to go shopping for prom," Alice said cheerfully.

Bella rolled her eyes playfully. "Of course we will," she said dryly. "Day trip to Seattle, then?"

"Or Portland," Rosalie suggested with a wink.

Alice coughed harshly, spluttering on a mouthful of water and glowered at Rose.

"What? It's the same distance and we might find something different there," was all Rosalie would say.

Alice narrowed her eyes at her future cousin-in-law, and Bella could see Edward and Jasper trying to keep from laughing out of the corners of her eyes.

"So why do y'all need to go shopping for prom?" Jasper asked, clearing his throat before he spoke.

"Oh, we all have to chaperone," Rose answered. "It's a good excuse for us to get all dressed up and relive the glory days of being a teenager again," she said.

Jasper groaned quietly. "So you're sayin' I'll need a tux?"

"That's exactly what she's saying," Bella said, pinching his side. "Don't worry, I'm sure Alice will be willing to help you everything you need."

Jasper sighed, and Edward chuckled. "There are some benefits to already owning one," Edward said.

"Or three," Esme chimed in.

"Are you and Carlisle coming this year?" Bella asked. They always looked so classily glamorous on the dance floor.

"We'll see," Esme said with a smile. "We haven't decided yet."

"I hope so, you always seem to have a good time," Alice added.

With that they slipped into talk of proms past, including their own high school proms. Bella hadn't gone to hers, despite being asked by several guys. She hadn't felt comfortable with the looks she'd gotten from some of the girls at the Reservation school when the guys had turned their attention to her. Instead she'd made herself a pizza, bought junk food, and had a movie marathon of all her favorites since Charlie had been on duty that night.

"I didn't go to mine, either," Jasper admitted. "It was too close to the year anniversary of my dad and Amber's deaths, and there wasn't anyone I thought about asking, even as just friends; I'd been pretty closed off from everyone and I was getting ready to leave for the service the week after graduation." He smiled sadly. "I didn't miss anything, honestly."

"Well, you'll get the experience this year," Bella promised, making a mental note to make sure they had a good time.

They continued talking over coffee and dessert, a delicious bread pudding studded with chocolate chips. Jasper's hand rested at the base of Bella's neck while he sipped his coffee, his thumb making lazy circles under her braid.

After dinner, Bella and Jasper cleared the table, and Rosalie and Alice did the dishes. Alice took off shortly after to go back to her studio; she had another big project she was working on, and Rosalie and Emmett left arm in arm to catch a movie.

Bella, Jasper, and Edward settled together on the couch while Esme and Carlisle disappeared down the hall. Bella was flipping through the channels on the TV when they returned, dressed up slightly.

"We're going out," Esme said, as Carlisle brought over her coat and draped it over her shoulders. "Not sure when we'll be home, but you kids behave yourselves," she said, teasing.

"Yes, mom," all three of them chorused together.

Laughing, Carlisle led Esme to the door, and then out, and Bella was left alone with Edward and Jasper.

For awhile, they just snuggled up together while Bella found a movie for them to watch. She was tucked between them, though her back was slightly to Edward because Jasper had lifted her legs into his lap. Her knees were bent and he was rubbing her feet idly through her socks. Edward had loosened the ties holding her braid together and had started combing through it, leaving it to fall around them in kinky waves where her head rested on his shoulder. Bella found herself dozing, relaxed by the quiet atmosphere and the tender comfort her lovers were giving. She had a small taste of what 'home' could be like, if it wasn't such an elusive thought for months in the future.

"Sweetheart?" Edward soft voice roused her from her thoughts. The movie was over, the credits rolling on the television screen. "It's early, but are you ready to go upstairs? We can find another movie to watch, or something?"

"Mm, I think I like the 'or something,'" she teased. Jasper laughed quietly beside her, leaning over to kiss her softly.

Edward switched off the television and Jasper shifted Bella's legs off his lap before he stood and offered them each a hand up. "Let me just lock up and I'll meet you upstairs," Edward said, kissing her softly, cupping her cheek and sliding his fingers around to tangle in her hair. She leaned toward him when he broke the kiss and pulled away, trying to follow. Jasper chuckled again and tugged on her hand, leading her upstairs.

They left the main light off in Edward's room, but Jasper switched on the small reading lamp near the bed to cast the room in a soft light just enough for them to see and not run into anything. Bella followed just behind him, and when he turned back toward her, she gently pushed him down onto the bed, one of his legs between hers, and she kissed him deeply, threading her fingers through his hair.

"Got started without me, I see," Edward teased, closing and locking the door behind him.

"Only just," Bella said with a grin, beckoning him over.

Edward moved to perch on the edge of the bed next to Jasper, twining his fingers with Jasper's before kissing him deeply. Bella sighed happily and smiled, shifting to straddle Jasper's leg that was pressed against Edward's.

"I think I owe you both a little payback for this morning," she said, still smiling.

"Why, didn't you enjoy yourself?" Edward teased.

"Hm," she agreed, reaching her hand around his neck to play with the hair at the base of his skull. "Maybe payback wasn't the right word, then."

Jasper 'tsked.' "And you call yourself a writer."

Bella laughed and gently shoved him with the flat of her palm against his chest. He toppled over on his back with a laugh, though her push was nowhere near enough to have actually budged him that far. "Repayment?" she suggested. "Reimbursement? Compensation?"

Edward made a face after that last one and she kissed him softly. "Okay, maybe not," she agreed with a soft voice. "So how about I just show you, instead?" She grinned and pushed Edward back onto the bed as well, and she crawled up after them both, still straddling their thighs and peppering both their faces with kisses while her hands went to work trying to get under their shirts.

Jasper and Edward 'helped,' by getting Bella out of her sweater and camisole, and generally getting in her way of getting them both naked. They laughed and teased at each other as foreplay, but Bella was determined. She was finally able to follow through as she did her best to give them a bit of what they'd given her that morning, without the wonderful sensation of heightened arousal with the fear of being caught. With her mouth and a hand on Edward, and her other hand on Jasper she succeeded in bringing both of her men to climax within moments of each other, and couldn't help the smug smile from her face at their slightly dopey expressions.

Then they tumbled her into the bed and showed her how grateful they were.

The next couple of days were pretty normal. Bella went to classes and graded papers, and snuck whatever time with Edward and Jasper she could get that wasn't at meals. It was hard; they were all busy with regular classes and end-of-year activities started taking up more of their time than usual.

Wednesday, after her therapy appointment, Bella went first to the grocery store, then to the Cullen home. She texted Edward and Jasper before she got out of the car, and smiled at their responses before going inside.

"Esme? Carlisle?" Bella called as she dropped her keys and purse onto the small table just inside the door. The house was quiet, though she knew her parental figures were home since their cars were in the driveway. When she didn't hear a response Bella shrugged, hefted her grocery bags and made her way into the kitchen. She dropped her bags on the island, then went back down the hall to the guest bathroom.

When she emerged, she heard murmured voices. Curious she stepped closer to Carlisle and Esme's bedroom door, not intending to eavesdrop, but wanting confirmation they were home and alright.

"You need to see a doctor," Carlisle said.

"I see a doctor every day," Esme responded.

"Don't get smart with me, Esmeralda Anne Cullen," Carlisle said sharply. "This is important," he said, his voice softer. "It might be nothing, but it might not be. This isn't something I can diagnose for you. I know you hate going to see a doctor, but you have to this time, love."

"I'm scared," Esme said softly.

With that Bella turned away and padded back down the hall, already feeling like she'd intruded enough, a small ball of anxiety and worry settling into her stomach. She knew how much Esme hated doctors; they'd joked once or twice about how beneficial her hysterectomy after Edward was born had been in helping her to avoid needing to go to a clinic when her husband was a doctor who could take care of just about anything else. Whatever it was they were discussing, Bella knew it had to be serious for Carlisle to be pressing her to see one of his colleagues.

Bella tried to put it out of her mind as she sorted through her grocery bags. She'd baked enough at the Cullens' home lately that she felt she should restock some of Esme's staples of flour, sugar, etc. The knot of worry that coiled around her stomach didn't loosen, however, as she slid the flour and sugar into the freezer to keep or as she pulled sticks of butter from the box to begin to soften as she measured out the dry ingredients for chocolate chip cookies. She heard the door open and close down the hall.

"Oh, Bella, sweetheart, I forgot you were coming tonight," Esme said as she stepped into the kitchen. Her hair was down and she looked a bit pale, the slight redness of her eyes a stark contrast under the kitchen lights. She moved easily behind Bella as she went to the kettle on the counter and filled it before flipping it on. "Do you need anything?"

"Oh, no, I'm good here. I just promised the yearbook committee I'd have fresh cookies for them tomorrow. They're finalizing the layout before it gets sent off to be printed and bound," Bella explained. "It'll be a long night."

"I don't doubt it," Esme said with a soft smile. She took one of the seats at the counter while she waited for her water to heat up. "How is everything? I feel like we never get a chance to talk anymore," she said, somewhat wistfully.

Bella felt a bit guilty; she used to spend more time with her surrogate mother, before she'd gotten so wrapped up in James, and then Edward and Jasper.

"Don't feel bad," Esme said, reaching across the counter to pat Bella's arm. "You kids have your own lives and seeing you happy has definitely been worth the trade off." Her smile convinced Bella she was sincere.

"Things are good," Bella answered simply with a matching smile. "I'm happy. I still have rough nights sometimes, but they're getting better."

"And things with Edward and Jasper?" Esme prompted.

"Are you trying to get me to spill dirty secrets about my love life, Esme?" Bella teased, laughing.

"Of course!" Esme replied, her laughter matching Bella's. "What kind of mother would I be if I didn't?"

They shared a laugh over that. "It's good," Bella finally answered. "They're good," she clarified. "We're still learning, but…" she trailed off with a shrug as she started getting the butter into the mixer.

"That's something that will probably never stop, the learning," Esme said, getting up when the kettle clicked off and coming around to prepare a cup of tea.

Bella nodded. "I just feel like I need to catch up with them a little bit. They've had months together and know all these little things about each other that I don't know. Jasper drops hints sometimes, like when we were gone last week, about how to help Edward relax after he'd been on his feet all day," she explained. She looked up and smiled at Esme, who'd settled back at the counter.

"And are you helping them remember to look after you when you need it?" Esme asked, fixing Bella with a pointed glance.

Bella blushed lightly and nodded. "Yeah, though they don't really seem to need it. They're good guys," she said quietly, feeling her smile soften.

"Well, I can only take credit for the one," Esme said, her grin bright, "But I'd have to agree with you there. So, tell me more about your trip to L.A.," she asked.

Bella was slightly relieved for the change in topic and she gratefully filled Esme in on the details of their trip while she mixed and prepared her pans for baking, then joined her at the counter for a cup of tea. She'd missed the quiet moments she shared with Esme, honestly needing a mother since hers had died when she was so young. Bella knew she was lucky; not everyone found a second family so accepting, and Bella knew that even if she weren't in a romantic relationship with one of Esme's sons, she'd still have remained a full member of the family.

Carlisle wandered through the kitchen sometime after the first cookies were done and he snagged a couple off the cooling rack while Bella fixed him a mug of tea. He kissed them both on the tops of their heads as he returned to his office.

Esme helped Bella wrap up the cookies (and she left a few more for Carlisle) and carry everything out to her car. Bella accepted and returned the hug Esme gave her before she slid into her car and returned to campus.

Bella wasn't sure if she should say anything to Edward or Jasper about what she'd overheard at the house. On one hand, Esme was Edward's mom, but if she'd wanted him to know, she'd have said something to him directly. She wrestled with it all the way back to campus, and finally decided as she pulled back into her parking space, the scent of fresh cookies filling her car, that she wouldn't mention it just yet. She could keep a secret, even if she didn't know what she was keeping.

Bella left the cookies in the kitchenette with a big note that told Alice to keep her hands off. She changed for bed and curled up with a stack of papers that needed to be graded for the rest of the evening, music softly pouring from her iPod.

Thursday after classes, Bella kissed Jasper before he left for the swim team practice and she went to grab dinner to go from the cafeteria so she could meet with the yearbook group. She swung by her room and changed into jeans and a t-shirt with a Forks Academy hoodie, grabbed the cookies, and returned to the humanities building where the committee was meeting in the classroom space they used.

Bella didn't need to do much, but was there to supervise and answer questions if any of the students had them. Edward texted a few times, whining about missing her (and Jasper, who was at therapy then history club), and she just texted back that she loved him.

At 10:30, the students were still working, and as far as Bella could tell, they had several hours of work still ahead of them. She glanced up from a page a student wanted some advice on at a knock on the door.

"Pizza and coffee delivery," Jasper announced. He was holding a stack of boxes while Edward had a bag from Starbucks around his wrist and a tray of cups in his hand.

The students cheered, and gathered around them with loud expressions of thanks as they helped themselves to pizza and coffee. Edward passed over one of the cups from the trays. "I got you some tea, sweetheart."

"Thanks," Bella said sincerely. The cookies had gone hours before, and the food and caffeine were clearly welcomed by the students, and would hopefully keep them going so they'd be able to meet their deadline of noon the next day.

"Need anything else, darlin'? If not we'll get out of your hair. We just thought you guys might need a little boost," Jasper said.

"No, I think we'll be okay from here. Thanks, guys, you didn't need to do this, but I appreciate it," Bella said with a bright smile. The students were occupied and Bella gave each of their hands a squeeze, but wasn't willing to do much more than that.

Edward, however, brushed his lips across her cheek. "You're welcome. Love you," he whispered.

"Love you, too," she mouthed. Jasper winked and smiled, and he and Edward left with the remaining two cups on the drink tray after the students called out another round of thanks.

Bella didn't make it back to her room until nearly two in the morning. She couldn't help but laugh at what she found on her bed. Propped against her pillow were a white travel mug with 'Best .Girlfriend .Ever.' stamped on it in pink next to a bag of tea from the Empress hotel and a tea-ball. Along with that was a yellow camisole with "Best Freakin' Girlfriend" in black text printed on it. There was also a note. She opened up the piece of notebook paper to see Jasper's scrawl.

_We know you had a long day, honey, and we just wanted to leave you a little something to let you know we were thinking about you. Sleep in – I'll have breakfast for you in the office in the morning before classes. We love you._

She smiled softly and moved the cup, tea, and ball to the table and quickly changed into her new tank-top and a pair of yoga pants. Exhaustion swept over her as she staggered to the bathroom to wash her face and brush through her hair before she shuffled back and fell into bed, barely remembering to reset her alarm for her regular time in the morning. She fell asleep quickly.

"Bella, honey, wake up."

"Hm?" She blinked her eyes open, frowning when she took in the sight of Alice perched over her.

"Your alarm's been going off for twenty minutes," Alice chided. "Late night?"

"Yeah," Bella answered, sitting up and scraping hair out of her face. "Year book," she reminded her suitemate.

"Right," Alice answered. "You're going to be late if you don't get a move on," she advised. "I'll get water on for tea."

"Jazzy said he'd have breakfast for me in the office, so I can sleep a bit later," Bella answered muzzily, her eyes sliding back closed. "Wake me in half an hour?" she mumbled.

"Sure, Bells," Alice said with a sigh.

It seemed like only moments later that Alice was shaking her awake again, waving a mug of tea under her nose. "Okay, you've got to get moving this time. I've laid out clothes for you, don't worry, it's casual Friday approved, and you've got forty-five minutes until classes start."

Bella took the mug and nodded as she took a big mouthful. "Thanks, Alice."

"Anytime, hon. Don't forget, we're off to Portland tonight!" she reminded Bella as she danced out of the room.

Bella groaned. Thankfully, she'd thought to get a hotel that had a decent spa, so she'd be able to get a little pampering while Alice was off with Charlotte on Saturday, though she had agreed to meet them both for brunch on Sunday before she and Alice came home.

She dragged herself to the shower after draining half the mug of sweet milky tea that Alice had made for her. She washed quickly but lingered under the hot water, the long hours of the day before seeming to have settled in her neck and shoulders leaving her stiff and aching. When Bella felt like she'd been in long enough she regretfully shut off the water and wrapped up in her robe and towel.

True to her word, Alice had left jeans and an academy polo and long-sleeved skinny t-shirt on Bella's table. She dressed quickly and tugged on a pair of socks with her worn pair of black Chuck Taylors. She made sure everything was in her school bag and locked her door on her way out.

Despite being tired, it was a good day. Jasper had brought a cup of oatmeal with raisins and brown sugar from the dining hall for her, and all of her classes went well. She and Alice had a quick dinner with the others, and Bella kissed Jasper and Edward goodbye when her two men walked her and Alice to Alice's car.

Bella and Alice chatted nearly the entire four-hour drive to Portland. They got checked into their hotel and Bella crashed onto her queen sized bed, falling sleep quickly to the sounds of Alice moving around and the television in the background.

Saturday, after a quick breakfast together, Alice left Bella on her own.

The spa was located on the ground floor of the hotel, and Bella went down in a pair of yoga pants, a tank top, and flip flops about ten minutes before her pampering was scheduled to begin. Though she'd had the means to be able to indulge in regular massages, manicures, pedicures, facials, whatever, she rarely took the time, not feeling that the travel time to Port Angeles was really worth it. She figured she could have found a massage therapist somewhere in Forks, but the treatment was all the more special when she was able to really treat herself on rare occasions.

Bella spent four hours in the spa. She had an hour long massage, letting her mind drift with the meditative music that played quietly in the room while her body was gently manipulated into a lazy state of relaxation. After her massage she had a mani-pedi, her toes getting painted a springy bright pink while she only allowed a clear top coat on her nails. After a light spa lunch and a relaxing soak in the lightly scented whirlpool, a facial finished off her treatment. She tipped all of the staff well when she settled her bill, beginning to feel the tell-tale soreness in her back and shoulders from the massage.

The weather was clear and warm, so after a quick trip up to her room for her purse and a sweater, she walked around Portland, ending up at Powell's for a few hours before getting dinner and heading back to the hotel.

The temperature had dropped, while she was out, and she was glad she'd thought to grab her sweater; by the time she got back to the hotel her toes were cold and her arms were tired from carrying the bag of books and small bag of leftovers (and dessert) from her early dinner.

Bella dropped her books on the bed and slid her leftovers into the small fridge tucked away in the corner of the room, deciding she'd take a shower to warm up and remove the last of the greasy feeling from her skin after the treatments earlier in the day. She piled her hair up on top of her head to keep it from getting wet and she lingered under the hot water until her skin was pink and her fingers started to prune. Relaxed and tired, she wrapped one of the large hotel towels around her body just above her breasts and tucked and wrapped the ends under her arm.

Her phone buzzed in her purse while she was digging clean panties from her bag, and she smiled as she crossed to it on the bed, having not heard from her boys all day. She found her phone at the bottom of her purse and frowned as she tilted her phone around, trying to distinguish the picture they'd sent. The caption read 'we miss you.'

Bella's face lit with a blush when she realized the picture she saw was a hand wrapped around a cock. The photo wasn't clear enough for her to distinguish any details, but she grinned as she typed back a reply, snapping a picture of herself wrapped in her towel.

'_Doesn't look like it_'

She set her phone back down and crossed back to her bag, finding panties, a pair of worn out cotton pajama bottoms and the tank-top Jasper and Edward had gotten her. She threw everything back on the bed as her phone buzzed again.

'_Jaspers hand isn't the same as you_'

A heartbeat later she got a second text, with a new picture. "Oh," she said softly, looking at was clearly lips around a shaft. '_neither is Edwards mouth_'

She grinned. She could play, too.

Before she replied, Bella double checked the locks on the door and made sure the 'do not disturb' door hanger was out. She lowered most of the lights in the room, leaving just enough light to be able to use the camera on her phone. She cleared her clothes from the bed, having no immediate need for them, dropping them back into her bag and retrieving the small bottle of personal lubricant that had been in her travel kit for as long as she could remember. Bella called up a mental image of Edward and Jasper together, feeling a wave of arousal pulse through her. She used that, loosening the towel and letting it fall into her lap where she sat on the edge of the bed.

Bella cupped a breast in one hand, using her fingers to tease her nipple into a peak, feeling it send flutters down her spine toward her core. She snapped a picture with her free hand and quickly typed out a message and sent it to both of their phones.

'_know what you mean_'

She dropped the phone next to her on the bed, within easy reach, and continued to slowly touch herself. She skimmed her hands over her belly, the skin soft and flat, despite the fact she spent more hours sitting on her ass than anything else lately. She wanted to get back to yoga; it did awesome things for her flexibility.

Bella's hands pushed the towel away from her body as she reclined, bringing her feet up on the bed to push herself back toward the center, laying perpendicular to the headboard. She felt her hair come loose from the knot on top of her head and she caught wisps of it spilling around her. She took her time teasing herself; it had been a long time since she'd pleasured herself without assistance from something with batteries. She relaxed into it, visualizing herself somewhere else, with someone (okay, two someones) else.

Her phone buzzed again and she fumbled for it, forcing her eyes open so she could read the messages.

'_is it hard for you too?_' from Jasper, and she groaned out a laugh at the pun.

Edward's text was accompanied by another photo: hands rolling a brightly colored condom onto the head of an erect cock. Both of her men were circumcised, and from the view, she couldn't tell whose she was seeing. '_wish u were here_'

Bella let her legs fall slightly more apart and the fingers of her left hand trailed up her thigh, her knuckles just grazing the neatly trimmed hair over her mound. She sighed softly at the contact, the scent of her arousal filling the air. She could feel the dampness pooling, but she still reached for the small bottle, spilling a few drops onto her right hand, using her thumb to coat her first two fingers.

She snapped another picture, her eyes heavy as she penetrated herself with a low moan. She opened her eyes enough to make sure she replied only to Edward with the message '_u2_' before dropping it back to the bed with another quiet moan as she slipped her fingers out, then back in.

Bella dimly recognized the buzzing of her phone in the background as she concentrated on the way her body was feeling. She slowly worked herself up, allowing herself to relax into the sensations. In her mind she was with Jasper and Edward and she was pleasing herself for them.

Her orgasm washed over her like a gentle tropical wave, and she was able to coax a smaller second one from herself with her fingers before she sighed softly; she could feel the smile on her face. Bella wiped her fingers on the towel that she'd discarded to one side and lazily reached for her phone as she shifted on the bed, trying to turn the covers down without having to get up. When she was settled, her naked body between the cool sheets, curled halfway around one of the pillows, she checked her messages again.

'_thank you, darlin. love you_'

Bella laughed softly and returned Jasper's message. '_luv u 2_'

The picture in Edward's message this time was nearly as indistinguishable as the first, and she eventually concluded it was supposed to be the two of them curled around each other in the aftermath. '_we should do that in person sometime. love you. sleep well_'

'_luv u 2. night_' she sent back. She set the phone off to one side and reached for the remote that was on the bureau. She found a movie to watch and after a bit, slid from beneath the covers to retrieve her cheesecake from the fridge. Still nude, she curled up under the covers again and ate her dessert with her fingers, watching Princess Bride on cable and quoting along with the actors before she slid into an easy sleep.

Relaxed and happy, Bella lingered again in the shower Sunday morning. She dressed in jeans and a sweater and packed everything up, checking out of her room before meeting Alice and Charlotte for brunch. Bella noted to herself how happy Alice was in the other woman's company, but she held her tongue, happy to enjoy the meal with both of them and get to know Charlotte a bit. She seemed like she'd fit right in with their group. After brunch and Alice said her goodbyes (with a lingering kiss that made Bella wistful for Edward and Jasper after only a day and a half), they began the drive back to Forks. The drive back was much the same as the drive down, and Bella enjoyed the chance to get caught up with her best girlfriend.

Bella spent the rest of Sunday doing laundry in the basement of her residence hall and preparing the lessons for the next week while chatting with Edward and Jasper over the school messenger system. She couldn't wait until the day that they were able to just spend the weekends together, in their own space that they could call home.

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There are seven chapters left of this story (well, 6 and an epilogue). Not to fear, however, I have a multitude of outtakes and future takes planned. If there's an outtake that you'd particularly like to see, I'm putting myself on the author auction block for **Fandom Give Back: Eclipse**, so you can bid on asking me to write something just for you. It's all for a fantastic cause. There's a link to the site on my profile.


	56. Chapter 55: Early May

**Thanks as usual to naelany for the beta work. :)**

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When the email from the Dean's office appeared in Jasper's inbox Monday at lunch, he was a mix of anxiety and excitement as he clicked on the subject line to open it. He knew it was coming, but no one had really been able to give him an idea of when to expect the invitation to interview for the full-time tenure track position that he was currently filling only temporarily. Jasper stared at it for a few minutes, re-reading it several times before he finally replied. He set the appointment for his normal office hour on Thursday, more willing to skip dinner before therapy than to be late for a class if it went longer than the hour it was scheduled.

That left him with three days to put together a teaching demonstration and update his CV. He wasn't nervous about the interview per se; he'd always been good at projecting confidence even when he didn't feel it and pulling off a good interview. He was more concerned about all the things that were riding on the outcome of the interview.

He hadn't been kidding when he'd told Bella and Edward that he didn't need to work another day in his life if he didn't want to. Given his dad's line of work in the oil fields, he'd had a very generous life insurance policy, as did his mother, and Jasper had been the sole beneficiary of both. When his mama had passed, one of his comrades in the corps had recommended a broker that had helped Jasper get everything securely and lucratively invested. Jasper was a simple man with simple needs; he could happily live off the interest of his investments for years to come. But he also wanted to make sure that he could help contribute to whatever household they managed to establish, and inherent in that was taking care of his partners, financially, emotionally, and physically.

Jasper was aware that he could do all that without necessarily holding down a steady job, but he also knew that it wouldn't take long for him to go completely nuts without something to do. Of course, the idea of being a stay-at-home parent appealed, but Jasper quickly put that thought out of his head; they hadn't yet discussed the idea of kids with Bella, but he knew he it was just a matter of time until that conversation came up. He knew he didn't need to teach. He could write, or finally figure out a hobby, but if he was being honest with himself, he loved Forks Academy, more than he'd enjoyed any other school in the five years he'd been teaching, and he really didn't want to have to leave. Part of that, Jasper understood, was his relationship with Edward, Bella, and the rest of the family, but he also truly liked the atmosphere of the school, and the students made teaching (most of the time) enjoyable instead of a chore.

Realizing the thoughts were getting him nowhere, he gave himself a mental shake and started making notes on his notepad about what to do for the teaching demonstration part of the interview.

"You okay, Jas?" Bella called quietly from across their office, looking at him over the top of her laptop screen.

"Mmhm," he hummed, looking up with a small smile. "Just thinking."

"Okay, well, don't hurt yourself," she teased.

"Yes'm," Jasper replied cheekily, making Bella laugh softly.

He forced himself to focus on the lessons ahead for his last classes of the day, and used his prep-period to begin pulling together his ideas for the teaching demo; it was an activity he'd done many times before, but had to modify it slightly, given that his "class" would be a room full of board members without the benefit of lectures leading up to it.

After classes and his office hour (in which he spent the time going over materials with a student who'd had significant absences in the last several weeks that put him dangerously near failing), Jasper met up with the others for dinner.

"So, plans for the week?" Alice asked as everyone settled.

No one really had anything new, other than Jasper, who got a round of smiles from everyone when he announced he'd be having his interview on Thursday. Emmett, once again, saved Jasper from having to get into too many details by providing them all with the humorous story of his first interview with the Dean and Jasper shot him a thankful look. From there they all shared a variety of embarrassing stories about work and school until the staff chased them out of the dining hall.

Tuesday was pretty routine. The swim team pushed themselves fairly hard at practice; they had another meet at the end of the month and they were all determined to do better than the last one, though they'd come in a perfectly respectable second place. Most of the students were simply looking to better their individual times, but there was also a good sense of team camaraderie leading to the ultimate goal of taking the meet. Jasper managed to stay out of the pool for once, which meant he didn't need to shower after practice and he made it to dinner a few minutes earlier than normal.

Despite everyone being busy, Tuesday seemed to be the night during the week with the least amount of activities going on, and they lingered over their meals. Emmett and Rosalie sat close together as Rosalie filled them in on their final selections for cake and the reception menu; they weren't having a huge ceremony, but Rosalie wasn't about to ask Esme and Bella to cater, either. About 100 people had been invited, faculty and family, and some former co-workers of both Emmett and Rosalie's whom they'd kept in touch with over the years. Rose's one concession was allowing Alice to be her photographer, but insisting on having a back up since Alice was part of the ceremony as well.

When the dining hall staff eventually kicked them out, Jasper walked back to his dorm with Emmett. He left his door open for the students until quiet hours settled over the hall while he worked on the handouts he'd need for his teaching demonstration Thursday evening. He could hear Emmett through their opened conjoined doors, occasionally singing along to his music on his side of the suite.

When Jasper woke Wednesday morning he could feel the anxiety begin to creep up his spine, though his interview was more than 24 hours away. He quickly dressed for his workout and jogged across campus to the gym. The jog was his warm up and he worked on an elliptical machine, Edward appearing on the machine next to him about ten minutes into Jasper's workout. Jasper smiled at him, but they both had their iPods on, preventing conversation (not that they usually talked much during their gym time). When Edward was done he moved off to an empty space and worked with Emmett on some stretches while Jasper wrapped up his turn on the elliptical and moved into the other room to do a quick circuit of weight training.

Jasper tried to focus on his music and the rhythm of his repetitions to keep him from thinking too hard about what was looming on the horizon and it worked, to a degree. He lost himself in his workout until Edward tapped him on the shoulder to tell him that he was leaving with Emmett. Jasper kissed him quickly, then finished up his workout and jogged back across campus to his room.

He had to shower quickly, having taken a bit more time than normal in the gym. When he left for breakfast his hair was still damp. Jasper joined the others when he'd gotten his bowl of cereal and cup of coffee, and found his seat between Bella and Edward.

"You okay? You were kind of focused this morning," Edward said quietly.

"Yeah, just trying not to think too much," he answered, pouring the milk over his bowl of frosted corn flakes. "Too much going on in my head."

"Don't hurt yourself, okay?" Bella said softly on his other side. "It'll be fine, and you don't need to push so hard."

Jasper nodded. "I won't."

She smiled and went back to her breakfast and the conversation she'd been having with Alice when Jasper had sat down, trying to figure out when they were going to go dress shopping for prom, and Rosalie got involved as they tried to decide if they were going to Seattle or Portland and if they should make a weekend out of it. It sounded like Rosalie and Bella were trying to convince Alice that Portland would be the better trip, and Jasper was surprised that it took some convincing. He would have thought that she would have jumped at the chance to get back down there so soon. They agreed to go in two weeks, since they had the next Sunday at the Cullens' for Mother's Day, and it was Bella's weekend on call.

As usual, Bella and Jasper walked together to their office, and Bella made herself a mug of tea in her Forks Academy mug, rather than the one Jasper and Edward had gotten her, and they split up for their morning classes.

Jasper's classes went fine and he ran out to get lunch for himself and Bella before going back to the office. They ate at their desks while working, which was nothing out of the ordinary; Jasper answered a few emails and saved a couple that had end-of-year procedures he'd want to call up again later.

His afternoon classes were no trouble, and during his office hours, he saw three students on his advising list that wanted help with course selection for the Fall semester, and he helped them out the best he could with the school's online catalogue and their needs.

After another lively dinner with the girls finalizing their shopping plans (and Alice demanding Jasper's measurements so she and Bella could shop for him as well), Jasper and Edward walked Bella to her car so she could go to her therapy appointment, and Jasper went back to his room after walking Edward home and sharing a long, lingering kiss behind his closed door.

Jasper occupied himself through the night by finalizing his presentation for the board and correcting homework. He listened to Edward's playlist in the background, having supplemented the piano music with other suggestions that Edward and Bella had both made over time.

He was quite honestly surprised that when he finally shut everything down for the night and got ready for bed, that sleep came easily, and he rested peacefully throughout the night, despite the growing tension in his body as his interview drew closer.

Thursday morning Jasper pushed himself just a bit harder than normal in the gym, trying to use exercise and the endorphins to dissolve the knot of anxiety and tension in his stomach. He wasn't worried about fucking things up for himself, but for Bella and Edward. He hardly touched his breakfast, but had milk instead of coffee, his stomach already feeling like a ball of churning acid, and he didn't have time to run out for antacids.

"Everything okay?" Edward asked quietly at Jasper's elbow.

Jasper nodded, poking at his food. "Anxious," he said with a shrug.

"It's going to be fine," Bella assured him with a smile. "You're going to be fine, and no matter what happens, we'll be there, okay?"

Jasper nodded again, taking a deep breath and letting it out slowly, finding that it didn't help much.

"Whatever happens, it's not going to change the fact that we love you," Edward murmured just loudly enough for Jasper to hear. "Just relax, and be yourself."

"I know," Jasper said quietly, finding a small smile for them.

Bella kissed his cheek quickly and Emmett took over the conversation, leaving Jasper to tear his toast into small pieces instead of eating it and drank his milk.

After breakfast, Bella walked with him to their office, her hand around his elbow, and he appreciated the quiet support and distraction as she chatted about one of the student performances from her Shakespeare class.

"Thank you, darlin'," Jasper said when they reached the office, kissing her softly behind the closed door.

"Anytime," she said with a bright smile, crossing to her desk and gathering her things for her first class of the day.

Jasper had wisely rearranged the schedule for the week so that he'd have things to focus on in classes, rather than letting the students do the review sessions for the exams he had scheduled for Friday. They still did review, but Jasper was bit more involved than the usual worksheets and such that he gave the students, doing a more interactive study where the students quizzed him, or they played a version of Jeopardy. By lunch, Jasper was much less anxious, having had fun with the students and getting his head out of the interview mindset and back into teaching.

Lunch was waiting for him on his desk when he got back after his morning classes. Someone had brought him a half of a turkey sandwich and a bowl of potato soup. Bella smiled at him over her laptop and went back to work, eating as she typed. Jasper focused on his messages and calendar during the half-hour break, trying to hang onto the calm he'd found while teaching, knowing that the anxiety was going to creep back in during his prep hour when he wouldn't have anything to focus on.

"Thanks for lunch, sweetheart," Jasper said, catching Bella at the door with a kiss on their way back out to their first afternoon class.

She shrugged off his thanks but smiled brightly and gave his hand a squeeze before she ducked out.

Jasper conducted one more review session before his prep, and after dropping his bag in his office he decided to go for a walk. The weather was clear for once, and he left his jacket in the office, but grabbed his iPod from his bag before he set out. He scrolled through his playlists until he found one called 'wandering' and strolled at an easy pace around campus. Jasper let hit thoughts wander, not really hanging onto anything in particular. He had about two months to come up with a wedding gift for Rosalie and Emmett, and less time to figure out something for Edward's birthday. He should probably get together with Bella to plan that one, since she'd had such a good idea for his. He knew that Rosalie's birthday was coming up soon, too, but didn't have an exact date for that.

He hadn't had to keep track of those kinds of things in so long, but he was starting to get better. Bella had found him a small calendar that he actually liked, from the same company that Edward used for his small notebooks. Jasper'd started plugging in dates and things, though it didn't actually start until June; anything before that was going on sticky notes on the first couple pages.

Jasper nodded at students who greeted him as he walking, just making a loop around campus. The music helped to keep him from thinking about much and before he knew it he was back at the Humanities building with only about 10 minutes before his next class. He made himself a cup of tea, still not feeling like he needed coffee, and gathered the review materials he'd prepared for his last two classes for the afternoon. While grading all the tests at once kind of sucked, it was nice to have a solid day of having all his classes in the same place, rather than having to keep track of how staggered they were.

Just like his morning classes, Jasper's afternoon classes provide a great distraction and before he knew it, Bella was giving him a soft kiss, telling him he was going to do fine, and handing him his messenger bag with the supplies he'd need for the teaching demo.

He crossed campus quickly, not wanting to be late. They were meeting in the conference room in the library, and Jasper hadn't set foot in the room since the Writer's conference; when he'd met with the board to discuss that event specifically, they'd used a vacant classroom. He wasn't sure why they couldn't do the same thing for his interview, but he steeled himself before pushing the doors open.

Two long tables had been pushed together to allow seating for all twelve members of the board, plus the Dean and the head of the History department, Dr. Peters.

"Good afternoon, Dr. Whitlock," Dr. Harper greeted him.

"Dean Harper. Dr. Peters, Ladies and Gentlemen," Jasper said to the assembled Board. He could never remember all of their names. He set his bag down next to the empty chair with a new bottle of water. Underneath was a small scrap of paper in Esme's handwriting. _relax_ it said, with a smiley face. Jasper couldn't help but grin as he took his seat, shifting just once to get comfortable before resting his arms along the arms of the chair, his hands at the edge of the table.

"Shall we get started?" The Dean asked, unbuttoning his jacket and taking the seat nearest Jasper's left.

Jasper nodded his agreement, and the dean deferred to one of the board members.

"Dr. Whitlock, can you tell me about your philosophy on teaching?" a mature woman asked, jumping right in.

Jasper took a deep breath and answered. They questions continued for half an hour, and while they weren't anything he hadn't heard before, he was still slightly anxious as he answered, patiently listening to follow up questions and managing not to fumble with the bottle of water that Esme had left when he opened it.

"Alright Dr. Whitlock, the floor is yours," Dr. Peters said when the questions had been answered.

Jasper pulled his demo materials from his bag. "I'd like you to get into groups of four, please," Jasper said. "Or, wait," he said counting. "Two groups of four and two groups of three, and once you're arranged I'll explain our next activity." While they arranged themselves, Jasper sorted through everything, wishing there was a blackboard or smart-system available, since it would make things so much easier, and wondering once again why they weren't doing this in a classroom where it would actually make sense.

"Alright," Jasper said, slipping easily into his classroom voice, commanding the attention of his 'students.' "We've been briefly discussing the Oregon Trail in the last week. As we discuss more over the course of the next month, we are going to do a bit of a role play activity along with it. Your groups are now your wagon trail," Jasper announced, and he was met with, instead of the mix of groans and cheers from his students, smiles and nods as his demonstration group began to understand the activity. "We will also be reading the short novel _Patty Reed's Doll_, about the Donner party's crossing into California."

"Each day for the next several weeks, we will spend 10-15 minutes of class on our travels. As a group you will need to make decisions that will essentially decide the fate of your train. You'll post your decision on a map, and at the beginning of each day, I'll give you the result of your decision. Questions?" he gathered the handouts he had ready and began to pass them around the table.

One of the board members raised his hand. "What if we die?"

"Depending where we are in the exercise you can get a re-boot," Jasper explained. "The rules are coming around. Also coming around is an information sheet y'all will need to get started today, since you haven't had the benefit of a week of lectures and discussion leading up to this activity," Jasper explained.

"What we're going to do today, is set up your wagons," Jasper continued, standing at the head of the table. "On the back of the list of rules is a list of all possible supplies. As a group, you need to determine how many people are in your train and what supplies you're taking. To keep things fair, everyone will be 'leaving' Independence Missouri on the same day. That background information is on the second handout. Questions?" he asked again.

"Alright. Get started. I'll be coming around to offer suggestions or answer questions. We'll take most of the class period today for this, or the remainder of the twenty minutes you've given me for this demonstration," Jasper said.

For the next fifteen minutes Jasper circled the conference tables. The groups had spread themselves out so they wouldn't directly be overheard by the others as they started strategizing and planning their travels. The group that the dean was in decided they'd be 'problem students' and supply their train with beer and prostitutes. Jasper tried to advise them, but they ignored him. Jasper let it go; in class, they'd quickly learn their lesson.

"Okay, class, that's all for today," Jasper said after keeping half an eye on the clock. The minutes had passed quickly and the Board members seemed to enjoy his activity.

"Thank you, Dr. Whitlock," the dean said. "I believe there are a few more questions?"

Jasper nodded and took his seat again.

"Is this an activity you've actually done in class?" one of the members asked.

Jasper nodded again. "Yes, though not here. It didn't fit within the curriculum for the third year students that I had this semester. It was very successful at St. Maria academy, my previous institution. The students enjoy the opportunity to 'live' the experience that they're learning about, and it seems like play time while they put that knowledge into practice."

"And how does it affect the student grades?" another asked.

"It's been my experience that students who engage in activities like this one, rather than just book memorization and lecture, score better overall on exams and are better prepared for college. I also tie in a paper on what they learned through the experience, while they read a fictional account as well as some primary source material," he explained. He then went a little off topic. "Students who get involved with their learning are more invested in the experience," he said. "When they get to play and be hands on, they enjoy it. Lectures aren't just boring for the students, either," he said. "They can be boring for the instructor as well, and a bored instructor doesn't engage the students," he concluded.

"Any other questions?" The dean asked after a moment of contemplative quiet. When no one answered he smiled at Jasper. "Thank you again, Dr. Whitlock. You're our last interview, and we should have a decision made when the rest of the faculty receive their offers next Monday. Enjoy your weekend."

"Thank you," Jasper said honestly. He gathered up the remains of his papers and shoved them into his bag, glancing again at the clock. He had time to grab a sandwich before he needed to leave for his therapy appointment. He shook a few hands on his way out and was overall very pleased with the way things had gone.

He made his way quickly to the dining hall and asked the young lady behind the sandwich line to just wrap his turkey and provolone in a napkin because he had to eat on the run. He grabbed a bottle of soda, his lack of caffeine for the day finally making itself known by the throbbing in his temples. Jasper also grabbed a banana off the fruit tray and made his way through to find the others to at least say hi.

"How'd it go?" Bella asked softly as he stood behind her and Edward, his hand curling around a lock of her hair.

"Good. I just wanted to say hi. I've got to run to therapy, then history club," he said. "I'll see you all tomorrow though." He tugged lightly on Bella's hair and gave the back of Edward's neck a light squeeze.

Everyone wished him a good night and he took off, eating the banana on the way to the car, then eating the sandwich as he drove across down. Riley greeted him with a cup of coffee and Jasper waited patiently for the five minutes he'd been early, finally finding the calm that had evaded him for most of the day.

Jasper had a good conversation with his therapist. He discussed some of the things that he'd talked about with Bella and Edward already, like their plans for the summer and fall, and how he was feeling about all the developments in their lives. They also talked about his desire for a family and what some of the repercussions could be, not only for them, but for their children and their extended family as well. Dr. Jones encouraged him to have the conversation about kids with Bella and Edward soon, to make sure that they were either on the same page, or willing to make adjustments for whatever future they wanted to have together. Kids weren't necessarily a deal breaker for Jasper; he loved Bella and Edward too much to walk away simply if she didn't want to (or couldn't have) kids.

At the end of the hour Jasper thanked her and said goodnight to Riley on his way out. Jasper knew he still had some issues to deal with, but they were working their way through everything, and Jasper had a feeling she thought that his current relationships would probably go further toward helping him deal with his past, so he went with it. He was glad that he'd given Dr. Jones a chance when he'd been so quick to dump her at the beginning of the semester, but he knew a large part of that was his unwillingness to open up when things had been so strained between himself and Edward while Edward was travelling those first few weeks.

Back on campus Jasper made it to the history club meeting just in time, as usual. When the meeting was over Jasper went back to his room and crashed onto his bed, taking just enough time to change and brush his teeth. He laid there for a long time before he slept, but he enjoyed the quiet chance to be alone with his thoughts, and when he did finally drift to sleep, it was peaceful and he slept through the night.

When Jasper joined the others at breakfast Friday morning, there was a discussion already going on about weekend plans. Edward caught Jasper up as he slid over the salt, pepper, and hot sauce.

"Emmett and Rosalie are going to Seattle for the weekend, and Alice is trying to talk Bella into something, but Bella's on call, so she's trying to say she needs to stay here. We don't have anything planned except dinner Saturday night and with Bella on call, we'll need to decide if we still want to stay over on Saturday or just come back here," Edward explained.

"I'm i_on call_/i, Alice," Bella said, exasperated. "And you two can just stay at the house. No need for us all to have to be miserable in our tiny beds, alone," she said with a slight pout.

"Ye-ah. I think we'll come back to campus," Jasper said slowly, "We can always keep you company," he suggested.

Bella's pout flipped into a smile and she nodded before turning back to her argument with Alice. Edward laughed quietly on Jasper's other side and Jasper just listened, amused, as Bella tried to fend off her best friend.

All of Jasper's students complained about having to take a test on Friday, but when he reminded them it meant there was no homework for the weekend they seemed to take it a little better. Jasper spent his classes reading or working on other lesson plans while they took their tests, and he piled everything into his bag at the end of the day, hoping to get some time over the weekend to get them all graded to hand back on Monday.

After dinner on Friday, Jasper walked Edward back to his building, since the girls were having some kind of hall party, girls only, leaving them to their own devices. Edward's suitemate was out, and one of the other faculty upstairs was on call for the night, so they were able to lock both doors and have a little bit of privacy.

Jasper reverently stripped Edward and took his time loving him. He'd kind of missed having time alone with Edward; as much as he loved Bella and spending time with both of them, the time he'd had with Edward alone was special to him, and Jasper put as much of that emotion into his actions as he could. While they were still intimately connected and cuddled together in the bed, Edward ran his fingers through Jasper's hair.

They didn't seem to need ay words, and Jasper was surprised to find that he didn't feel any guilt, either, for not including Bella in some way. Edward seemed to get what Jasper was trying to process and kissed him softly before detangling himself and stepping into a pair of discarded sweat pants before going into the bathroom. Jasper tossed the condom and borrowed a pair of Edward's sleep pants, and they spent the night together in the too-small bed, bringing back memories of some of their earliest days together.

Saturday night they gathered at the Cullens' for dinner. There was an undercurrent of tension between Esme and Carlisle, though Jasper couldn't really pinpoint it. They seemed as affectionate with each other as ever, if not more so, which was what confused him.

After dinner, since Rosalie and Emmett were already absent, Bella, Alice, Jasper, and Edward returned to campus. Jasper and Edward hung out with the girls watching movies and talking until an emergency called Bella away, and Jasper and Edward returned to their own rooms.

Monday morning brought a whole other kind of buzz to the campus. The faculty were all mostly aware that they'd be receiving their renewal offers sometime during the day, and those that were in residence seemed pretty anticipatory while at breakfast. Jasper tried not to think about it much as he walked Bella to their office and got ready for classes.

Edward was waiting outside their office when Jasper and Bella came from their respective ends of the building when their classes were over for lunch.

"Hey," Jasper greeted him as he unlocked the door and let them both go before him. "What's up?" Edward rarely sought them out for lunch, using the time to coordinate with Angela or run errands if he'd been off campus for therapy like he usually was on Monday mornings.

"I got my offer for next year," Edward said, flopping into the student chair at Bella's desk. Jasper couldn't decide if he looked defeated or exhausted; none of them had considered the possibility that he wouldn't get renewed for the next year.

"And?" Bella prompted, smoothing her skirt down as she sat in the executive chair behind her desk.

Edward sighed as Jasper dropped his bag at his desk and drug his extra chair over. "They want to give me a full time position," he said quietly.

Jasper's brow furrowed. He hadn't realized that Edward wasn't full time.

"Which means what, sweetheart?" Bella asked.

"I'd be directing all three of the upper level bands, plus teaching four classes. It's a full seven-course load, plus touring and teaching lessons." He sighed again.

"Why is this a bad thing?" Jasper asked, still confused.

"Do remember what February was like?" Edward asked, completely rhetorically. "It adds two classes to what I've had this semester and my schedule already put a big crimp in the amount of time we were able to spend together."

"And do you remember what I told you when you were first asked to take over for Dr. Anderson?" Jasper asked. "We'll deal with it. If you want it, do it. Look at the bright side; it'll mean you've got the same number of classes as me an' Bells," He suggested. "Do you want it?"

"I don't know," Edward admitted. "It means having to deal with some things in terms my physical therapy because I won't have as much flexibility in my schedule…" he started.

"But that's not supposed to be a forever thing, right?" Bella asked.

Edward shrugged. "We haven't put any kind of stop-date to it."

"Okay, so you can work that out with Jane and Dr. Card. What's the other thing?" Jasper asked, knowing that there had to be something else that was holding Edward back.

"If I take it, it's mine for as long as I want it so long as I complete at least my MA in four years," Edward answered flatly.

"Okay," Bella said slowly. "What's the problem?" She asked, clearly confused about why that would be something to hold Edward back.

"How the hell am I supposed to teach full time and get another degree?" He asked, anger and frustration seeping into his tone. "I mean, I get the situation, they can't have someone with just a BA practically running the performance side of the department, but with all the classes, too?" He sighed again and scrubbed his hands over his face.

"When do you need to accept the offer?" Jasper asked.

"I have until next Monday, at noon," Edward answered. "Why?"

"This weekend, we'll go to your parents' house, take over the dining room table, and sort it out. We'll find the programs in the area, see what works, and figure out if we can make it work for you, okay?" Jasper said. "Bella and I have done this already, so we can help you sort through all the information, and we're going to be there on Sunday for Mother's day anyway, right, so we may as well stay the whole weekend and see what we can do."

Edward nodded, sighing again.

"Hey," Bella said, rising and shifting to sit on Edward's lap. "This is a good thing!" she said with a smile. "Haven't you wanted this?"

"Yeah, kinda, I guess," Edward said, wrapping one arm around her back to steady her. "I mean, eventually, sure, but I didn't think it'd happen this way or this soon. I really didn't think that they'd ever offer me anything permanent before I had an advanced degree, and I wasn't really to start thinking about going back to school on my own just yet. And it's just going to take up so much time, when we already have to plan ahead for what we can get, especially if I'm having to study on top of everything else."

Bella looked up at Jasper, a question in her eyes. He shook his head; he hadn't gotten anything with an offer yet. "But honey, we both have full time loads, too. And maybe it's time to really consider our living situation for next year," she said. "It won't seem so bad, maybe, if we can be home together, every night, in our own bed." Bella lightly combed through his hair with her fingertips.

Jasper watched as Edward leaned into her touch. "Yeah," Edward agreed. Jasper glanced at the clock over the door.

"We should probably go grab lunch," he said softly. "We'll have time to talk about this later, okay?" He ran a hand down Edward's arm and twined their fingers together. "We don't need to make any decisions right now."

"Yes, I'm hungry," Bella said, responding to Jasper's first statement. She rose, kissing Edward lightly from across the desk as she gathered her i.d. card. "We can talk after dinner?" she asked as Jasper lightly tugged Edward from his chair.

Edward nodded. "I don't have anything planned but the usual."

"Okay," Jasper agreed, kissing Edward softly. "Come on, let's go feed our girl," he said lightly, giving Edward's hand a squeeze before letting them proceed him out of the office.

They grabbed something to go from the cafeteria, half their lunch period already gone. Jasper wolfed down his sandwich and Bella quickly ate her wrap, while Edward carried a couple pieces of pizza back to his office. Jasper made it to his next class just as the bell rang, to the general amusement of his students.

When he got back to his office for his free-hour there was still nothing from the Dean's office. Jasper knew he'd get an email no matter what the board had decided; he'd either get a "thanks for your service" letter or the offer for the permanent position. As his prep-period drew on, Jasper fought to not force his email program to 'send and receive' every minute as a feeling of dread shivered down his spine. As the bell sounded, ending the hour, Jasper took a deep breath and closed his eyes, trying to find the well of calm that he knew existed deep within him, and kept up a mental mantra of 'they love me, the job doesn't matter, they love me, the job doesn't matter,' as he gathered the materials for his next two classes.

His students kept him sufficiently distracted throughout the afternoon before his office hour by asking thoughtful questions and engaging in the discussion topic for the day. When he'd left the office, he made sure to bring all of his materials, knowing he'd obsess over his email during the passing period if we returned to his office. His final class was giving presentations that forced him to focus on the accuracy of their information and the quality of their presentation.

Jasper gathered his things when the classroom emptied, and he methodically erased the board and closed down the smart-system in the room that a few students had used for their presentations. He made his way back up to his office, and found another couple of students lingering outside, waiting for their turn for advising.

"Come on in," Jasper invited, unlocking the door, finding Bella's side of the room vacant. "Help yourself to something to drink," he said, waving toward the coffee machine and the small stack of paper cups next to it; he and Bella had stocked up when the advising season had started right after spring break. "Who's first?" He settled at his desk and wiggled the mouse to wake his computer back up, inputting his password as one of the students took the seat at his desk and went through her bag for her papers.

Jasper minimized his email program without looking at it, and focused on helping the student pick classes for the fall. It wasn't something he'd done much of in the past; all his previous postings had been seriously temporary and he'd rarely been assigned anyone to directly mentor. He understood that at Forks, he had taken over Dr. Palmer's advisees as well as everything else.

When he'd helped both students, he went through his list and noted those he hadn't seen yet, and popped back into his email to send out a reminder.

His breath left in a quiet 'whoosh' and his pointer hovered over the subject line "Forks Academy: Fall 2010" from the Dean's office. He took a deep breath and clicked.

_Dear Dr. Whitlock,_

_On behalf of the Governing Board of Forks Academy I would like to formally extend an invitation for you to join the full time faculty of the history department at Forks Academy._

That was as far as Jasper read before his eyes closed with another soft exhalation. Everything was going to be fine. He'd done it. For the first time in his adult life, Jasper Whitlock knew he was going to be okay. He had a home and a family. While the job wouldn't have necessarily changed that, it did make things immensely easier for himself and his partners.

He jumped slightly at the feel of hands on his shoulders, and felt Bella's lips on the top of his head in quiet apology as she read over his shoulder, the message still open on his screen. "I told you everything would be okay," she said softly, leaning forward slightly and wrapping her arms around his neck, pressing her cheek against his temple.

Jasper covered her hands with his own and felt himself relax slightly; he hadn't heard her come in. "Yeah," he acknowledged, hearing a hoarse edge to his voice that hadn't been there before.

"Hey," Bella said quietly, withdrawing her arms and gently turning his chair. She perched on his lap and wrapped her arms around his neck again. "We're okay," she promised. "I'm renewed with my full load, you've been offered a full load," she said, which was more than Jasper knew at the moment. "And Edward's got his, if we can convince him that it's not the end of the world," she said with a wry smile.

Jasper laughed softly and buried his nose in her hair, wrapping his arms around her. "I know," he said. "Just…for the first time, in a really long time, things have turned out the way I've wanted them to," he confessed quietly. "I have friends, a family, and two gorgeous generous people that make me smile and make me happy. I have a job that I love in a community that seems accepting, and I'm really truly happy."

Bella beamed at him. "I'm glad you're happy, sweetheart," she said before kissing him tenderly. "Come on," she said softly. "Pack up and let's get to dinner."

Jasper kissed her again quickly then shifted her off his lap so he could unhook his computer and get everything into his messenger bag. Bella went across to her side of the office and packed a few things up into her bag, and they met at the door. Jasper locked the door behind them.

Bella wrapped her hand around Jasper's elbow as they walked to the dining hall. Once they arrived they went through the serving lines on their own and made their way to the rest of the group.

"So?" Emmett asked expectantly as Bella took the seat next to Edward, leaving Jasper between her and Rosalie at the round table.

"What?" Jasper asked, toying with him.

"Dude, you know what? I got my renewal offer, five classes plus football in the fall, full load in the spring. Rosie got re-upped with her full load," he said with a bright grin. "And the housing provision was removed since the dean already knew we'd be moving off campus at the end of the year and not coming back."

"I got mine," Alice acknowledged. "Four and four again, which is what I want, so I'm happy. It leaves me time to work on my own stuff, too. I'm still on campus and they've tentatively allowed me the full suite again, depending on circumstances."

"Yeah, we haven't figured anything out for sure about housing yet for next year," Bella responded. "I'm full load again as well, seven and seven," she announced, toying with her glass of water.

"Edward?" Emmett prompted after a moment. "Come on, bro, don't leave us hanging," he practically begged.

Jasper reached his arm around Bella to Edward's shoulder, knowing the man was still twisted up about his offer.

Edward sighed. "They've offered me the full time Director of Bands position. Four classes, three bands," he said softly. He continued before Alice's bright smile could erupt into something louder. "There's a catch, thought. I have to complete at least my Master's in the next four years."

"Pft," Emmett scoffed. "That's it? Man, you know that's no problem."

Edward just stared down his brother. Jasper squeezed his shoulder; he could tell the other man was still slightly on edge with everything.

"Did you work while you were in graduate school, Em?" Bella asked.

"Nope, didn't need to," he said. "I TA'ed of course, but I didn't have another job," Emmett answered. "Oh," he said a bit softer, the metaphorical light bulb going off. "Still, four years while working full time isn't impossible."

"I know," Edward sighed. "It just seems like such a huge decision."

"What's the alternative?" Rosalie asked. "If you don't accept their terms, then what?"

"I'd have the job for next year while they searched for a replacement, at which time my position would be 're-evaluated according to the needs of the students and institution,'" he said, and Jasper could hear the quotation marks in his voice. "We're going to look at things this weekend," Edward said and Jasper squeezed his shoulder again and reclaimed his hand so he could eat. "We'll try to figure out if it's feasible, and what we want."

"Well, we've all done it, too, so let us know if there's any questions," Rose added. "What about you, Jasper?"

He knew he was the wildcard of the bunch. He grinned. "Full time, full load," he answered simply.

Emmett let out a whoop that had other people I the dining hall turning to look at their table. "We get to keep you?"

"Christ, Emmett, he's not a puppy," Rosalie said with a roll of her eyes, but she was smiling. "That's good news, Jasper. I'm happy for all of you," she said sincerely.

"Decisions to make, then?" Alice asked.

Bella nodded. "As soon as we know we'll let you know," she said, and Alice had the grace to look slightly embarrassed. They all had a good laugh and the conversation moved on to other things.

After dinner, Bella and Edward walked with Jasper and Emmett back to Jasper's room. Emmett gave them privacy, closing their adjoining doors while they piled onto the bed in a tangle of limbs and bodies, the dim light of sunshine outside supplemented by Jasper's reading lamp.

"I want a house," Bella announced into the quiet semi-darkness.

"Okay," Edward answered slowly.

"I mean it," Bella said firmly. "I know it hasn't been that long, really, but I don't know that I can do this for another year," she said, her tone a bit softer. "We spend so much time apart, and it's not fair. I'm tired of giving up something I want in order to be professional or supportive. I want a house. I want a place we can call home, where we can have dinner together, every night. Where we can cuddle on the couch and be free to be affectionate together. I want to be able to go to bed with you both _every night_," she stressed.

"I may not have had that terrible of a life," she continued after a heartbeat, and Jasper could feel her hand tracing random patterns on his thigh. "But it feels like forever since I've had a home. Your parents have given me that, Edward," she said, turning her head toward him. "But I'm tired of feeling like we're invading every time we go over for the weekend."

"What about our responsibilities here?" Jasper interjected. "Can all three of us bail on our in-residence status?"

"Is that even our problem?" Bella asked.

"Yeah, sweetheart, I think it is," Jasper responded quietly. "Are they expecting us to stay in residence? I didn't even read that whole letter this afternoon," he said.

"I don't know," Edward answered. "We can ask mom, if we need to. But I think maybe Bella's right here; it's time for us to do something we want to do, and the administration can figure it out. I'm sure there are people in the community that could fill our roles, if not actual faculty who might agree."

Jasper closed his eyes. "If that's what we want, then I'm okay with it. I just hate thinking that we're going to leave people in a lurch."

"Honey, for a long time, your life has been travelling from one place to another, not getting attached, and just doing what people asked of you," Bella said softly. "Isn't it time that you do something you want, not something that you have to do?" she asked gently.

"Yeah. I just…" Jasper sighed. He wasn't sure what he had to say wasn't going to be hurtful, but…he took a deep breath. "How can we be sure this is the right thing? Or the right time? I love you both, but how do we know this is going to work? What if six, nine, twelve months from now we-"

Edward cut him off. "Baby, stop."

Jasper closed his mouth, feeling fingers in his hair.

"Nothing's certain in life," Edward continued quietly. "We simply go along and make the best of it. But we can't make decisions based on the what-ifs. We can only do what we think is right for us right now and deal with things as they happen."

"I know that deep down you're worried that we're going to leave," Bella added, and she shifted so Jasper could see her face. "I have the same fear, that someday I'm going to wake up and this will all be a dream," she confessed quietly. "But one of the things I'm learning is that I can't go through life expecting the worst of everything and everyone, though I've got good reasons to, given what's happened in my life. And I don't want to live that way," she said, her voice firmer but her tone still soft. "Things may not always be good. We're probably going to fight, a lot, since we've never truly lived together. But we're not going to run away. I love you, Jasper, and I love Edward, and we're in this all together," she said.

"I know," Jasper whispered. He felt arms circle him and squeeze. "It just seems so…."

"Permanent?" Edward suggested.

Jasper nodded.

"But isn't that the point?" Bella asked, and Jasper could feel fingers combing through his hair again. He could only assume it was Bella, but he wasn't sure. "We can't keep living the lives of transients, staying in the dorms until we're old enough to retire. I don't _want_ to. We can't be Peter Pan, refusing to grow up and holding onto our college and high school days by surrounding ourselves with high school students all the time. As good as the food is, I'm tired of it. I miss cooking. I'd like to be able to have an adult conversation over a glass of wine without having to worry about being on call or interrupted by a student. I'm twenty-seven, Jazzy. I want to live an adult life," she said quietly.

"I want to be able to lay around in bed on a Sunday morning, or walk around in pajamas with coffee, and be able to sleep with you, literally and metaphorically, whenever I want," Edward continued. "We've already wasted so much time, Jasper. I don't want to waste anymore, not when we've got the challenge my position to deal with, too."

Jasper knew he was being a bit selfish in his fears and anxieties. "I know. It's just a lot to accept, for me, anyway. I've got a permanent job, a family, partners. A year ago I was having a phone interview with the dean and had three others lined up for various parts of the country. All of this is still a little scary," he admitted.

"But we're right here with you," Bella said quietly.

"I know," Jasper said back, reaching for and squeezing the hand on his thigh.

"So, a house?" Edward asked a hint of teasing in his voice.

"Sounds like," Jasper answered.

Bella lightly smacked them both.

The tension broke and they laughed quietly, shifting around a bit to exchange kisses and tender touches. They remained cuddled together for a little while until Bella declared she needed to get back to her room to finish prep for the next day and Edward offered to walk her home. Jasper showed them out, kissing them each before they opened the door.

When they were gone, Jasper settled at his table and booted his computer back up. He logged into his financials, having sent everything off to the accountant to do taxes only a month previous, but wanting to check on things. He had assets available for whenever they actually got around to purchasing the house; he knew they'd need to have another conversation about money at some point.

After checking his email Jasper changed for bed and read until sleep claimed him, late into the night.

The rest of the week passed in a general blur. End of year-itis was settling into the students hard, and Jasper had to pull out of lot of tricks to keep them focused as they headed into the last four weeks before finals. His upper level classes were starting to get excited for prom, and some of the younger students were much more excited to get to go home for the summer holidays.

Though spring had firmly settled on Forks and daylight savings time had taken place, it wasn't really distinguishable in Forks, other than the negligible amounts of additional daylight in the evenings. The temperature didn't warm all that much, though the rain seemed to fall less frequently. On the rare sunny days, the students hauled blankets out onto the lawns to study or socialize.

By Friday, Jasper was ready to get off campus for the two days they planned to spend at the Cullens'. His dorm room had started to feel slightly confining with the promise of an honest-to-god home in the near future. He was also very much ready to let the on-call faculty member deal with the restless students who could smell the end of the year the way animals could smell fear or a predator.

After classes, Jasper returned to his room to pack a bag for the weekend; he, Bella, and Edward were going out for dinner in Port Angeles before crashing at Esme and Carlisle's for the weekend. He met his lovers at Edward's car, and he couldn't help but breathe a sigh of relief as they left the school in the rearview mirror.

Bella laughed and looked over her shoulder. "Ready for the weekend?"

Jasper nodded. "Oh yeah. The last month or so of the year is just rough."

Edward met his gaze in the review mirror and smiled sympathetically. "It all seems to rush up on your at once, doesn't it?"

"Yeah," Jasper answered, settling into the backseat for the drive. "And there's just too much. Review for finals, prom, Day on the Green. I may as well just discount the last week of classes," he groused. He didn't even mention all the 'ceremonies' that happened as students were inducted into honor societies and clubs had end of year parties. No wonder he couldn't seem to get his classes to focus lately.

"It'll get easier, as you get to really know the students and community a bit better," Bella responded. "And once the students, especially the younger ones, realize they can't take advantage of you because you'll be back next year."

"And the year after and the year after," Edward intoned with a smile.

"Yeah, I know," Jasper answered. He was trying not to fall into the same trap the students were; they were looking so forward to the end of the year that they were practically unable to concentrate on anything else. He was maintaining control of his classroom, but sometimes only just, and he wanted to spend at least part of the weekend trying to find ways to modify his upcoming lessons to try to keep their attention. "What do you do for the last few weeks?" he asked them. He was tempted to assign all his classes a last minute in depth research project that they could work on in class that would be one part review and one part busy work. They could teach each other to prep for their finals.

"I give the theory class a practice AP exam," Edward said. "In music history they spend the last few weeks preparing a presentation about their favorite composer or musical movement."

"Projects and presentations," Bella agreed. "And a lot of group work."

"Pretty much what I was thinking about," Jasper said. "I'm trying to think if I can pull off a huge interactive project this close to the end of the term without distracting from the need to review for finals."

"What did you have in mind?" Bella asked.

He tugged on a loose piece of her hair that had fallen over the seat. Jasper told them about the activity he'd done for his teaching demonstration. "I'd want to do maybe a scaled down version of it, but I think we could do it."

"That sounds like a lot of fun," Edward said.

"It really does. You could always coordinate with one of the other teachers, too. What years do you have?" Bella asked. With that they kind of schemed about an extended project for two classes that could extend over both their history and English classes.

They were still plotting, trying to put together an actual assignment when Edward pulled into the parking lot at the Italian restaurant where Jasper had taken Bella back before Valentine's Day.

The hostess seated them in a round booth in the corner, and they were able to sit close together with Bella in between Jasper and Edward. Bella ordered a glass of wine and an order of mozzarella sticks without hesitation while they reviewed the menu and it made Jasper more than happy to see that she was finally comfortable to just order what she wanted without consulting either of them first. Jasper had an iced tea and Edward had water and they munched on breadsticks and Bella's fried cheese while they waited for their entrees.

"So. House hunting?" Edward asked.

"Rosalie gave me the name of their realtor," Bella said, setting down her wine glass after taking a sip. "Maybe we should start there?"

"We should probably put together a list of things we want," Jasper added. "Also…" he trailed off.

"What, babe?" Bella prompted.

"Kids," Edward answered softly, picking up on Jasper's train of thought. "Jasper and I have already talked about it some," he said.

"We just haven't," Jasper continued. "It's not something we need to think about right away, but it may factor into what we want for a house.

She took one of their hands in each of hers. "I would absolutely love to have a family with you someday," she said quietly, a soft smile on her face. "I'm not saying I'm ready to go off birth control right now, and there's probably going to be a lot of things we'll need to deal with, in terms of legality and things when we get that far," she said thoughtfully. "But you're right. I'm thinking four bedrooms, minimum."

"Four?" Jasper clarified.

"Mmhm." She nodded. "Master, study, guest, and possible nursery." She ticked them off on her fingers. "We're going to need some place to work; we'll still have our offices on campus, but we'll need a place at home where we can keep our messes contained."

"Good point," Edward said. "I'd like a big patio. We need somewhere to put that fuckawesome chair Jasper got me that we haven't been able to use much lately," he said with a grin.

Jasper chuckled. "Okay."

"What do you want, Jazzy?" Bella asked, shifting a bit closer to his side.

He shrugged one shoulder. He hadn't put much thought into it. "A kitchen that you'll be happy to bake in. A space where we can set up video games to entertain Emmett and the kids that he and Rosalie will have. Room for Edward's piano. A dining room table big enough for the family. A bed big enough for us to share. A whirlpool bathtub in the master bath. Maybe a hot tub on the patio. Room for Bella's crafts." He was mostly just thinking aloud.

Bella kissed his jaw. "I think we can manage all of that," she said softly. Jasper felt Edward's hand on his neck and saw his answering smile as their server brought by their food.

"Let's put together a formal list tomorrow and I'll get it to the realtor," Bella said, unwrapping her silverware and going after her mushroom ravioli with gusto. "When do we want to have something purchased?"

"By August or January," Edward answered. "If we still want to go away this summer, that gives us some time, or we can always stay with mom and dad. But if we don't find anything by the time school starts…"

"We may be back on campus for a semester," Jasper finished, cutting off a bite of his chicken parmesan.

"We'll manage," Bella said, their little voice of reason. Jasper nodded and kissed her head.

"You know," Edward said thoughtfully, twirling fettuccine on the spoon with his fork. "We should probably see about contacting a lawyer at some point."

"What for, sweetheart?" Bella asked.

"Well. As much as it sucks to think about, there are things we should plan for. We are all aware that accidents happen," he said dryly. "Medical proxy is one thing we're going to need to set up for each other. Not to mention life insurance. Buying a house is just part of starting a life together. What about money? We've all got separate money beyond our paychecks from school. What if we do have kids?" he asked, his voice taking on a worried edge. "There's only two biological parents, so what about the one of us that _doesn't_ father the child. What would his rights be? What happens to the other two if something happens to one of us?"

"Shh, baby," Bella soothed him, laying down her silverware and cupping his face lightly. "We'll figure it out. Let's add that to the list of things to look into this weekend, okay?"

Edward nodded. She kissed him softly and he calmed a bit.

"So, what's the plan for Sunday?" Jasper asked, not so gently changing the subject. Bella blinked at him then giggled, but Edward gave him a soft look, thanks in his eyes.

"Well, you boys will be on brunch duty," Bella answered. "Rose, Alice, and I are making dinner. Well, Rose and I," she clarified. "Esme gets to sleep in and do whatever else she wants, which is generally fussing over all of us fussing over her," she said lightly.

"Has she always been that way?" Jasper asked.

Edward nodded. "After me, she couldn't have kids. They tried, but there were complications and she ended up having a hysterectomy a couple years after I was born," he explained. "Since then, she's always been willing to give a bit of home to whomever she could. When we were younger, she was really active in PTA and sports and music boosters, always helping out with those that didn't have what they needed. It wasn't really until we went to college that she started bringing home 'strays' as dad used to call them," he said lightly, his eyes sparkling. "Friends of mine or Em's from school, faculty at the Academy, whatever. She didn't go to work there until after we were out of the house, when dad took the job to be home more often, rather than at the hospital. I think that if she'd been able she'd have had at least two more kids," Edward said fondly. "We were never sure why they didn't adopt or foster," he said with a shrug.

"I'm glad she found me," Jasper said honestly, and not for the first time.

"Me too," Edward and Bella said together.

When they finished their meals, they ordered a dessert to share and Edward and Jasper had coffee while Bella had a dessert wine. The drive home was a bit quieter as they were all stuffed and content, but they still talked as Edward navigated their way home.

The house was dark when they arrived, which wasn't unusual for a Friday night. Dinner had taken longer than they'd expected, and with an hour drive on each end, it was pretty late. Someone had left the porch and foyer light on for them, and Bella led them easily through the house while Jasper shouldered their bags and Edward turned off the lights.

They made their way upstairs quietly, though Jasper and Edward couldn't help but chuckle when Bella tripped over the top step and stumbled forward (though Jasper tried to soften it by wrapping his arms around her waist and pressing his chest to her back as they walked the last few feet to the bedroom). They were all familiar enough with the space that Bella didn't turn the lights on as they entered, Jasper still draped over her back. He pressed his lips to the back of her neck before releasing her and dropping their bags in the customary place against the wall.

* * *

end note: Yes, Jasper's activity in the teaching demo is roughly based off the video game "Oregon Trail," which I have fond memories of from elementary school, and an activity that I did in junior high where we role played about lives in Feudal Japan.

http://en(dot)wikipedia(dot)org/wiki/The_Oregon_Trail_(video_game)

http://www(dot)amazon(dot)com/Patty-Reeds-Doll-Story-Donner/dp/0961735724/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&s=books&qid=1270345007&sr=8-1


	57. Chapter 56: Mother's Day

**Thanks as always to Naelany for her awesome beta skills. :) **

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Edward woke Saturday morning, Bella curled around him. Jasper had scooted off to one side in the night but his arm was flung over both of them. Edward kissed Bella softly and scooted out from under her so he could go to the bathroom. When he was finished he tugged on a pair of jeans and a raggedy t-shirt and padded downstairs barefoot in search of coffee.

His mom was sitting at the kitchen table, a vacant expression on her face. It almost looked as if she'd been crying, her hands curled around a cup of tea that was no longer steaming.

Quietly, he made himself a cup of coffee and prepared her a fresh mug before joining her at the table. "Mom?" he asked quietly, worried when she didn't look up at his approach. "Everything okay?"

"Hm?" she looked up and offered him a weak smile. "Yeah, baby, everything's fine. Your dad and I are running out to Seattle today. Will you three be okay on your own?"

"I'm sure we can manage," Edward said dryly, though he was still bothered. Something clearly was wrong for her to brush him off so easily. "What's in Seattle?"

"A surprise for Alice," Esme answered, her smile a bit stronger as she curled her hands around the new, hot mug. "We probably won't be back until late."

"Okay. We're just trying to get some things figured out today, and we'll order a pizza if Bella doesn't want to cook."

"Or, you could be gentlemen and cook for her," Esme advised. "She enjoys taking care of you, but don't forget that sometimes we like that, too."

"Yes, mom," Edward answered with a roll of his eyes. She laughed quietly and patted his hand before she rose. She was in yoga pants and a sweater, which meant whatever they were picking up in Seattle wasn't anything over formal. She kissed the top of his head as she passed.

Edward sat at the table while he finished his coffee, hearing his parents move around in their room down the hall. There didn't seem to be much noise coming from upstairs, so he figured maybe he could take his mother's advice. He poured himself a fresh cup of coffee and got to work.

He found everything he'd need to make a simple breakfast in bed in the fridge. He scrambled eggs with cheese, made toast, and used one of his mom's tricks of pre-cooked bacon. Edward found the serving tray his mom used, made up a cup of tea for Bella and coffee for himself and Jasper.

"Son? We're leaving." Carlisle said, poking his head into the kitchen.

"Drive safe," he said and his father nodded before stepping away. Edward heard the front door close.

He balanced everything carefully, smiling to himself as he was confident enough that he could leave his cane propped against the counter and carry the tray with both hands. He moved slowly, though; his limp wasn't as pronounced as it used to be but his balance was still off and he didn't want to spill and have to spend the day cleaning the mess out of his mother's carpet.

Jasper was awake when Edward entered the room, Bella curled up against his chest, her hair concealing her face. "Mornin," Jasper said softly.

"Good morning," Edward returned. He set the tray on the foot of the bed and climbed in to join his lovers. "I made breakfast."

"Mm?" Bella mumbled, stirring. "Food?"

"Good morning, love," Edward said softly, kissing her lightly before shifting over to kiss Jasper and reach for the tray.

Bella clutched at her mug of tea but picked at the food, waving off their concern by saying it was just too early for her to eat. Jasper and Edward ate off the single plate Edward had made, and when the food was gone they snuggled for a little longer, until Bella demanded to be let up and Jasper declared they should probably get on with their day.

When they were dressed they assembled at the kitchen table. Edward would have loved to have spent the afternoon on the patio chair that was big enough for the three of them, but they needed to do some serious research, and he had a feeling that it wouldn't get done if they weren't in a more formal environment.

They started working on Edward's Master's degree, first. They narrowed the options down to two universities in Washington, neither of which were practical for a commuter student working full time in Forks. They did, however, find several schools that might be able to accommodate him online. Since Seattle and Ellensburg were going to have to be last resorts for travel reasons, Edward turned his attention to the online programs first.

While he focused on that for awhile, Bella started putting together their requirements for a house and ran it by him and Jasper before she emailed Rosalie's realtor. Jasper worked with them both, helping Edward sift through details on websites and requesting information (since he'd have to apply for Spring semester anyway) when the websites weren't providing the information Edward wanted. Jasper made them sandwiches for lunch then turned his attention to searching local listings for a family law attorney and making a list of prospects in Forks, Port Angeles, and Seattle.

"Hey?" Bella asked suddenly. "Where're your parents?"

"Seattle," Edward answered, looking up from his computer and stretching. "Mom said they were picking up a surprise for Alice, and that we're on our own today."

"Mmkay. What should I make for dinner?" she asked next.

Jasper chuckled. "We could just order take-out," he suggested. "You're going to cook a big family meal tomorrow, sweetheart."

"Or Jasper and I can cook," Edward offered.

"Uhm, yeah, I'd like to be able to cook tomorrow, guys," Bella teased.

"Hey! We made soup that one time!" Edward protested.

"Once," Bella snarked.

"Alright, simmer down," Jasper interjected with a bright smile on his face. "What're you cooking tomorrow night?" he asked Bella. "And what are we making for breakfast?" he asked Edward.

"Eggs Benedict, hash browns, fruit salad, mimosas," Edward answered. "Oh, and probably salads or something because it'll be more like brunch. I think dad has the list."

Jasper rolled his eyes. "Do we need to go shopping?"

Edward knew what he was thinking. "Yeah, probably." They weren't as unorganized as it seemed, really.

"Rosalie is supposed to go shopping for dinner with Emmett and Alice on their way here in the morning," Bella answered. "So we'll just need stuff for dinner tonight and brunch tomorrow."

"Alright, let's make a list," Jasper sighed and grabbed for his notepad and pen. They brainstormed for the brunch menu and Bella decided on a few more things she wanted for dinner that she hadn't thought to ask Rose to pick up.

"We can just see what looks good for dinner while we're there," Bella decided.

"Okay, so are we ready to take a break?" Jasper asked.

Edward shrugged. "Sure." Bella agreed, and they left everything sitting on the table and went in search of shoes and wallets. Edward texted his brother and dad and let them know he was taking care of the shopping for brunch with Jasper.

Jasper took control of the list at the grocery store and they made their way up and down the aisles, picking up the things they needed for the brunch. They each threw in some things they needed for their rooms back at school, and they teased Bella about the box of strawberry Pop-tarts she tossed in.

They decided to do a quasi-Mexican appetizer type thing for dinner, picking up a box of frozen taquitos and the supplies to make nachos.

Jasper and Edward helped Bella put the groceries away when they got back to the house before they settled back at the table to finish what they were working on, then shifted their attention to school work. Jasper had a stack of tests to grade from the day before and Bella had essays. Edward kept plugging through his research for MA programs, not having anything from classes to go deal with.

When Bella made dinner, Jasper and Edward sat at the counter, keeping her company, and they took the small munchy feast to the living room where they found a movie to watch and relaxed. They spent the rest of the evening there, curled up and watching TV. It gave Edward a preview of what he could expect when they finally had a home of their own.

Since his mom had warned him that she and Carlisle would be late, Edward wasn't worried when they weren't home by ten. When they did get home shortly after eleven and Edward, Jasper, and Bella were preparing to watch Saturday Night Live, Edward was surprised to see who followed them in the door.

"Aunt Emma, Uncle David?" he asked stupidly as Jasper got up to help Carlisle and David with the bags. "What are you doing here?"

"Thought we'd give our Alice a surprise for mother's day," Emma answered, though Edward could see it was only a half truth. "We've missed her."

"It's good to see you again," Bella said quietly, rising to give them each a hug; she'd adopted them as her own aunt and uncle as well. "Alice will be so happy to see you."

"I hope so. How are you, dear?" Emma asked as she took Bella's arm. Jasper headed upstairs to the guest room with their bags. "We're not putting you out of a bed with our impromptu visit, are we?" she asked and Edward heard Bella's answering giggle as they went up the stairs. David followed with a bemused expression on his face.

Esme came around the sofa and kissed Edward's forehead. "We're off to bed. It was a long driving day."

"Okay," Edward answered, kissing her cheek in return. "Sleep in tomorrow," he chided her as his dad came around and wrapped his arms around Esme's waist.

"I'll make sure she does," he promised. "Night, son. Might want to try to keep it down with your aunt and uncle just down the hall."

Edward rolled his eyes. "Yes, dad."

Carlisle chuckled and led Esme down the hall to their room.

Jasper came back downstairs after a few minutes and joined Edward on the couch. "Bella's catching up with Emma while she unpacks," he reported. He stretched out, resting his head against Edward's torso as he turned toward the TV.

"Okay," Edward answered, running his fingers through Jasper's hair slowly.

"You okay?" Jasper asked after a moment, turning his head back toward Edward.

"Mm," Edward hummed. "Just thinking about stuff."

"Anything in particular?" Jasper asked.

"Just making things work," Edward answered with a sigh. "It's just a lot of big decisions at once."

"I know," Jasper agreed. "How do we know we're making the right ones?"

Edward shrugged. "We don't, I guess. But if we keep asking-"

"Then we'll be stuck where we are," Jasper finished.

Edward hummed his agreement and ducked his head to kiss Jasper softly. "So long as we stick together, we'll be okay."

"Yes, we will, baby," Jasper said.

They fell quiet as they watched the opening sketch for SNL, Bella still not appearing downstairs. After the monologue and following sketch, Jasper sat up and stretched a little. "I'm ready for bed. You coming?"

"Yeah, in a minute. Go on," Edward encouraged. Jasper kissed him softly and started up the stairs. Edward double checked the doors were locked and shut off the TV and lights, quickly rinsing their dishes but leaving them in the sink for the next morning.

When he got upstairs, the light was on in his bathroom, but the main room was dark. Edward could just make out the lump of a body under the covers, and he laughed softly as he retrieved clean sleep clothes and joined Jasper in the bathroom. "Guess we were just too exciting for her," he remarked quietly.

Jasper snorted, his mouth full of foam as he brushed his teeth. Edward laughed quietly again and Jasper shifted over to give him room at the sink. When they finished, Jasper turned the light out behind him, the night-light in place giving just enough light for them to make their way out.

Jasper climbed into bed first, slipping over Bella's body and tugging her lightly against him, making sure Edward had enough room to join them (she'd been curled up right in the middle). Edward quickly took his pills and slid his glasses off onto the nightstand after setting the alarm for eight.

When the alarm sounded the next morning, Edward quickly silenced it. Behind him, Bella stirred, her arms tightening around his waist. Edward kissed her gently and untwined her arms from his waist. She grumped, only half-awake, and he smiled as she turned toward Jasper when he sat up. Edward slipped his glasses on, then looked over his shoulder at the sounds of someone moving.

Jasper was lifting himself over Bella, slipping out of the bed, leaving her to sleep with a pillow in her arms. Edward knew that wouldn't pacify her for long. "Mornin'," Jasper said quietly, kissing Edward quickly before he stood and strode into the bathroom.

Edward reached for his morning medications and shamelessly watched as Jasper came back in and changed into a pair of jeans that hung on his hips and a long-sleeved waffle-knit shirt. Edward smacked his ass lightly as he passed him on his way into the bathroom for his turn.

After he washed up and brushed his teeth Edward dressed similarly to Jasper in comfortable clothes; they weren't going anywhere for Mother's Day so he had no worries about needing to dress up for any reason. Jasper was seated on the edge of the bed, running his fingers lightly through the very ends of Bella's hair, not enough to wake her. They went downstairs together.

The house was quiet when they reached the first floor. Edward didn't expect his brother, Rose, and Alice for another half-hour at least, so he padded into the kitchen and got the coffee started, and he heard the front door open and close and assumed that Jasper had gone after the paper. Jasper came into the kitchen as Edward was pulling down mugs and getting milk from the fridge. They didn't talk as Jasper took a seat at the counter and Edward passed him a mug of coffee before fixing his, then joined him at the counter. They split up the paper and just enjoyed the quiet moment before the rest of the family descended. Like what seemed to be happening a lot lately, Edward was treated to a glimpse of what their life off campus could be like.

"Hey-o!" Emmett's voice carried through the house.

"Quiet, you oaf. It's still early." Rosalie's voice was only a few decibels softer in her chastisement it seemed.

"Ugh, you two," Alice complained. "I'm going to see if there's coffee."

"Morning, Alice," Jasper greeted her as she stepped into the kitchen.

"Hey you two. Didn't expect anyone to be up quite yet," she said as she deposited a paper bag of groceries onto the counter and crossed to the cupboard where the coffee mugs were.

"We're on brunch duty," Edward reminded her. "Just waiting for Emmett."

"I heard my name?" Emmett asked as he came into the room, four paper bags in his arm, Rose just behind him with two more.

"You did. Ready to get started?" Edward asked, sliding from his stool to top off his (and Jasper's) coffee.

"Once we make room in the fridge for this stuff," Emmett said.

It took them a few minutes to dig out the brunch supplies and make room for all the things for dinner, but they managed to get everything arranged.

"Do I smell coffee?" someone asked from the door.

"Daddy!" Alice shouted, throwing herself at her dad.

"I see how it is," Emma grumped, a pace behind David. "She always was daddy's little girl." Alice squeaked and shimmied out of her father's embrace to hug her mom.

"Oh, it's so great to see you! Why didn't you say you were coming? How long are you staying? I thought you were in Europe or something?" the stream of questions poured from Alice and everyone laughed softly at the long-suffering expressions on her parents' faces.

"It's a surprise, I don't know, and we got bored," Emma answered quickly as Esme and Carlisle came into the room as well.

Edward switched on the kettle for tea, knowing that Bella probably wouldn't be too far behind them with Emmett's earlier wakeup call and the building noise in the kitchen as greetings and hugs were exchanged with Emma and David.

"Alright, everyone without a Y chromosome vacate the premises!" Emmett hollered to general laughter. Bella had joined them a few minutes before and she kissed Edward's cheek before she let Alice tug her into the living room with the other ladies, probably for an early morning gossip session.

Once they were alone, the guys got down to work. Bella had planned an earlier supper, so they were preparing a pretty substantial brunch. After realizing they had two more guests, Emmett suggested they add a quiche to the menu after finding a pie crust in the freezer. They also managed to make banana muffins and eggs Benedict, though they had to call Bella in to make the hollandaise sauce because Emmett curdled it the first time.

Once the ham was crisped up and the English muffins were toasted and lightly buttered, they transported all the food, along with the fruit salad that David and Carlisle had made (despite the fact that they claimed that Emma and Esme weren't their mothers and they didn't need to help), to the table, coffee a pitcher of mimosas joining the feast.

Alice had brought a bouquet of lilies and set up a centerpiece around the china that Rosalie and Bella had set out.

Once they all had their seats and the food had been passed around, they settled down.

"Thank you, boys for this wonderfully looking meal," Esme said from her seat at Carlisle's side. Edward could see that her hand was wrapped around his, tightly, by the white color of her knuckles. "And I hate to possibly ruin it, but I have an announcement to make, since you're all gathered here. I wanted to wait until this evening, but I just can't," she trailed off. She took a skip of her mimosa and cleared her throat. "I can't keep this from you all any longer."

Edward felt something cold and heavy settle in the pit of his stomach. He reached for Bella and Jasper's hands under the table and felt them cling to him. He knew from the way she'd prefaced her speech, from the way she'd looked the previous morning, sitting alone at the table that whatever she had to say wouldn't be good.

"I went to the doctor two weeks ago after I found a lump in my breast," Esme said quietly. Edward heard Bella's small gasp of surprise next to him, and he squeezed her hand a bit tighter. "I had a biopsy and mammogram last week. I've been diagnosed with what the doctor calls stage zero breast cancer."

Edward felt like he couldn't breathe. There was a faint ringing in his ears and he fought to clear it; Esme was still speaking.

"It's a non-invasive tumor which shows no sign of having spread," she continued. "I'll be having a lumpectomy on the fourteenth, followed up by radiation, just to be safe. Emma and David are staying to help while I go through treatment."

"Mom, we can-" Emmett interrupted.

"You have your own lives," Esme said. "And it's the end of the year and you're all so busy already. Anyway," she said, taking a deep breath. "Emma and David will be staying here for awhile. The doctor says there's no reason not to be optimistic at this point," she said bravely, her smile looking a bit shaky. "I'll have five weeks of radiation therapy, which is part of why Em and David are staying; I'll need someone to help me get to and from treatments."

"And we're ready to stop traveling for awhile, too," Emma added.

Edward didn't know what to say or think. All that was rolling through his mind was _mom's got cancer, mom's got cancer, mom's got cancer_

"Breathe, Edward." Jasper's breath stirred Edward's hair and he sucked in a large shuddering breath. He could feel Bella's short nails biting into the palm of his hand, though hers was shaking. Edward looked over to Bella; her eyes were wide and all the color seemed drained from her face. He squeezed Jasper's hand and released it so he could wrap both his hands around Bella's as he looked around the table.

His father, aunt, and uncle looked nothing but supportive, and Edward knew that his mom had broken the news to them earlier. Alice was seated between her parents, looking devastated; Esme was like her second mom. David's arm was around her shoulders, and she'd taken her mom's hand.

Rosalie looked impassive, which meant she was in turmoil. Her face was frozen in an expression of indifference, but her eyes were bright, and she was clutching at Emmett's hand on top of the table. Emmett was frowning, deep lines on his forehead and around his eyes. He looked angry and hurt. Edward wondered if he had a similar expression on his face.

On Edward's other side, Jasper just looked stoic, but from the tense set of his jaw, he was fighting his emotions.

"Esme's right, and her doctor is very optimistic," Carlisle said. "The procedures are, sadly, routine, and based on the tests already there's no reason to think that she won't be completely healthy after treatments."

Edward looked down at his plate, his appetite for the meal they'd prepared completely vanished. He squeezed Bella's hand and untwined his right, nudging away his plate and reaching for the champagne flute filled with orange juice and champagne and drained half of it.

No one said anything for a long moment. "So what do we do today?" Alice asked finally after the silence started feel charged.

"I would like to spend today like we planned, with my kids," Esme said softly. "I know it seems like everything has changed suddenly, but I don't want us to think that way. Yes, I'm sick," she said, her voice wavering on the last word. "But I don't feel bed. I feel just fine. I want to enjoy today with you before we all get busy again and treatments start to make me tired."

Edward felt Bella squeeze his hand and let go. He glanced at her as she reached for her silverware and slowly forked a piece of strawberry and brought it to her lips. Her hand was still slightly shaky, but somehow she managed to make the movement look normal. On his other side, Jasper squeezed Edward's shoulder before he rose, returning a few moments later with the small stack of Mother's Day gifts that they'd left in the living room. He took them over to where Esme sat and set them in the empty space between her and Carlisle before kissing her cheek and returning to his seat at the table.

Emmett had started moving food around his plate with his fork while Jasper was up, encouraged, Edward supposed, by Bella's attempt to start eating as well. Though Edward was far from hungry, he pulled his plate back toward him slightly and started picking at the muffin he'd taken from the tray.

"Thank you, Jasper. Kids, you didn't have to do this," Esme said, as she did every year, though Edward knew she was secretly pleased that they all thought of something unique to get her for being their mom. _mom's got cancer_ "Emmett, honey, pass the jam, please?" she asked.

Though the atmosphere still seemed sober and tense, it seemed that the ice had broken and even if the meal wasn't as lighthearted as is could or should have been, they all seemed willing to follow Esme's lead and have a normal Mother's Day together. On either side of him, Bella and Jasper seemed to pick at their food as well, though both of them managed to eat more than Edward did. The only person at the table, besides the parental figures, who seemed to have retained their appetite was Emmett, which didn't surprise Edward; Emmett's emotions had never been linked to his stomach.

Conversation was stilted though, as no one was quite sure what to say. Emma, bless her, tried, wanting to get caught up on the lives of everyone since she hadn't seen them all since Christmas, though she'd kept in touch with Alice. Edward watched his mom's expression shutter closed for a moment when Emma asked Rosalie and Emmett about their wedding plans, and the math happened automatically in his head; she'd be undergoing treatment up to and possibly through the wedding.

When it seemed that everyone had had their fill, Emma suggested that Esme go ahead and open her gifts.

"Oh, mom I didn't get you anything," Alice apologized quietly. "I was going to mail you something when I knew you were back in the States but I hadn't finished it yet…"

Emma hugged her awkwardly in their chairs. "Don't worry about it, sweetheart."

Carlisle topped off Esme's champagne flute while she reached for the first package in the small stack. She unwrapped the package carefully, revealing a framed photo of all six of the kids that Alice had made them sit for at her studio one night. "Thank you, Alice," Esme said quietly, a bright smile on her face.

Rosalie had given her soon-to-be-mother in law a gift certificate for a spa weekend in Seattle with her, for before the wedding (Bella and Alice were invited, but not included on the gift). Edward couldn't help but notice the way Rose clutched at Emmett's hand again, in anticipation of how that gift would be received. Esme just said a quiet and heartfelt thank you, and Rose assured her it could be rescheduled for any time.

Emmett, Edward, and Jasper had each given her charms for her bracelet. Edward and Jasper had shopped together online, and it had taken them awhile to find four charms that she didn't already have and that somehow represented them and her. Jasper had found a place online that did custom charms and had the family crest engraved on one for her, to go with the small pendant she wore occasionally. They'd also found a heart shaped charm that they could customized with all of their birthstones. The final two were a lotus flower and a green crystal within a cage (only because they thought she might think the last one was pretty, rather than it holding any special significance).

Esme opened Bella's last. Bella had made her a sweater from really soft yarn (Edward had dropped more than one hint that she could make him something from the same yarn). In Forks, sweaters were pretty much needed year 'round, and Bella had made it in soft spring colors. The girls gushed over it as Esme carefully passed it around after thanking Bella several times. It was obvious who got the most brownie points in terms of gifts, but for once, Edward couldn't find it within himself to be (even playfully) jealously upset.

The girls quietly cleared away the surprisingly large quantities of leftover food and the dishes after the gifts had all been opened and no one wanted anything else to eat. Edward topped off his coffee again and followed the guys, Emma, and his mother into the living room. At that point in the day, at least in the past, they'd have pulled out board games and Esme's favorite music and movies. Emmett, determined to make the day as normal as possible despite the bombshell that had fallen into their laps, Edward thought, went to the game closet while Carlisle and David went to the basement for the poker table and chairs.

Edward excused himself for a moment, giving Jasper's hand a squeeze before he went upstairs. When he reached his room he closed and locked the door behind him before he sank to the floor.

_mom has cancer. mom has cancer. mom has cancer_ sounded through his head with each heartbeat.

Edward's breath caught as he tried to swallow the sob the bubbled up. Intellectually he believed both of his parents, that Esme's doctors had every reason to believe that treatments would be successful and she'd soon be cancer free, but in that moment, Edward was a scared little boy that didn't want to lose his mother.

He allowed himself a couple of minutes to get calmed down before he levered himself off the floor. Edward crossed into the bathroom and splashed some water on his face after he stared at himself in the mirror for a moment. He almost thought he'd aged ten years in the last two hours. He ran his damp fingers through his hair with a sigh, collected himself again and made his way back downstairs.

The girls had finished the dishes and Carlisle and David had set up the game table. Edward had a feeling no one was really hungry, but Bella, in keeping with the original plan for the day had put out snacks on the coffee table. Edward joined Jasper in one of the arm chairs, relaxing into the firm warmth of his body. Bella joined them a minute later, and Jasper chuckled quietly as he was buried beneath them, but Edward didn't hear him complain, either.

They put a movie on the background while Carlisle set up a game of dominoes. Jasper and Edward elected not to play, but Bella slid from Jasper's lap to join the others. Dominoes was a good game because it could take several hours to play and gave them all something to think about and focus on. About halfway through the game that they weren't playing, Jasper excused himself, kissing Edward softly, then kissed Bella on the cheek before he went upstairs.

After Edward went into the kitchen for a drink, he realized he hadn't seen Jasper in awhile. Everyone else was still gathered in the living room, enjoying Esme's choice movie marathon and finishing up the first round of dominoes for Mother's day, Bella and Emmett sticking particularly close to her. Edward couldn't blame them; he'd had his own brush with mortality already, and he could still hear the steady beat of _mom's got cancer mom's got cancer_ in the back of his head. Sometime in the hours since brunch, Jasper had crept off somewhere and surprisingly (or maybe not, Edward rationalized) it had taken him (and Bella) a while to realize he was missing.

He checked the bedroom and basement first, then nearly smacked himself in the forehead when he figured out where his lover would have gone. At least he hadn't run, this time, Edward thought, as he stepped through the sliding glass door onto the back patio.

Jasper was curled in on himself slightly against the back of the large wicker chair he'd gotten Edward for Christmas. His spine was pressed against the back of the chair, his knees drawn to his chest, arms wrapped around them as he watched Esme's spring garden dance in the light breeze.

"Hey," Edward said quietly as he joined him, scooting back so that their shoulders were touching.

"Hi," Jasper replied, glancing over at him.

"You okay?" Edward reached for one of Jasper's hands and twined their fingers together.

"Just remembering," Jasper answered with a nod.

"Good things?" It went unsaid that Jasper was thinking about his mom. It had to have been a double whammy for him to not only have mother's day, for the first time in ten years, with a new family, but to receive the news _mom's got cancer_ for the second time.

Jasper's answering smile was sad. "Trying to. It's hard though," he admitted.

Edward could tell that there was something else that Jasper wanted to say, but was holding back. "Talk to me, Jas."

He shook his head. "It's not something you need to hear today," Jasper said solemnly. He did shift to rest his head lightly on Edward's shoulder, and Edward wrapped his arm around the blonde's shoulders. "Esme's going to be okay," he said softly, his breath just wafting across Edward's jaw. "There's no reason to think otherwise, right?"

"Right," Edward answered, having a better clue from that sentence as to where Jasper's thoughts had gone. Given the fact that his father didn't seem overly worried, Edward knew that Esme had been telling the truth when she said that everyone was optimistic about her prognosis. That didn't mean that there wasn't still an element of fear with the whole thing. _mom's got cancer_ "Even if she was softening the truth, dad wouldn't have," he promised Jasper. "But…I'm scared," he confessed quietly.

"Me too," Jasper whispered, and Edward felt his arms wind around his waist. "But we'll just have to be strong for her, and Bells, and wait and see what the doctors say next week."

"What's going to happen?" Edward asked quietly. He knew he could have asked his father, but wasn't sure he could bear to.

Jasper sighed. "They'll test the tumor and other tissue they remove and she'll have a follow up in a couple of weeks to make sure they got all the cancer tissue out," he said slowly, probably dredging up the memories from a decade earlier. "After the radiation she'll be checked out again. Hopefully they'll get it all with the first surgery. Mama…well, she had a different kind of tumor," he said quietly. "But the procedure's the same, at least at first."

Edward hoped that everyone was right and that after the surgery and treatment his mom would be cancer free. "I want to be there on Friday," he said.

Jasper nodded against him. "Angela should be able to arrange a sub for your classes. Can you cancel rehearsal?"

Edward nodded. "Yeah. The music for graduation isn't a big deal, and there's enough time missing one rehearsal won't matter."

"She probably won't want us all here fussing, but I'll meet y'all here after classes," Jasper promised. "And I'll keep my phone on."

"I think that's why Aunt Em is really here," Edward said. "To get her to listen when she needs to take it easy," he said with a sigh. "She's so much a care-giver that she doesn't always remember to be cared for herself. Between Dad and Emma, hopefully she'll listen. I'm glad she's here, though. I know we'd all have helped out as much as we could, but she wouldn't have let us."

Jasper hummed his agreement and shifted beside Edward, resting more of his weight against Edward's body. "I think it'll be good for Alice, too, to have her mom here while this is happening."

"Yeah, probably," Edward responded. "Just wish it wasn't for this reason, y'know?"

"Yeah, baby. I know," Jasper said.

They both looked up and over when the sliding glass door slid open again, and Bella stepped through. To Edward's eyes she looked tiny and frail suddenly. Neither of them said anything when she closed the door behind her and crossed the patio, climbing onto the chair and wedging herself in between them. She buried her face into Edward's chest and he could feel her silent tears soak his shirt, and Jasper shifted again, to wrap an arm around her shoulders as best he could. Edward pressed his lips to her crown and lingered there.

She sat up with a sniffle and a sad smile. "Sorry," she said hoarsely. It sounded like she may have been holding back that display of emotion for awhile.

"It's okay," he assured her, breaking the hug to use one hand to wipe away her tears. Jasper's arm replaced Edward's as they huddled together. Cancer had touched her life once before, too, though if he remembered right, Renee had passed from pancreatic cancer, and it had been fast.

She sniffled again and nodded, relaxing slightly against them both.

Jasper smoothed through her hair. "Going to be okay, darlin'?" he asked gently.

"I don't know," she admitted softly. "It's different, y'know, but the memories…" she trailed off.

"Mm," Jasper hummed and nodded.

Bella took a deep breath and slowly let it out through her nose. "How're you, Edward?" she asked after a moment.

"Still processing," he admitted. "Scared. Worried. I kind of want to talk to my dad and see what he has to say about everything, even though it's not his specialty. I'm grateful Emma and David are here, but confused about what this means for the next couple of months. Emmett's wedding is only a month and a half away, and there's so much going on with the end of the school year and everything…" he trailed off, letting out a long breath through his nose. "I don't know either, honey," he finally finished.

"I just wish there was something I could do," Bella said quietly. "I feel kinda helpless."

"Maybe you can help Emma make a few make-ahead meals?" Jasper suggested. "Or something special for Esme to take with her to treatments?"

A concentrated frown appeared on Bella's forehead. "Like a worry stone?"

"Or something that would just remind her of something good?" Jasper shrugged. "I'm sure you can come up with something, Bells." He tugged lightly on a tendril of her hair.

"Yeah," she mused. "Does radiation make you lose your hair?"

"No, that's chemo," Jasper answered quietly.

"And sweetheart, as much as you want to be supportive, please think twice before you shave your head?" Edward asked.

Bella looked shocked for a moment, then giggled, covering her mouth quickly as the sound escaped. Edward grinned and met Jasper's eyes over the top of Bella's head and he quickly moved his fingers to her sides, finding the sensitive spots above her hips where he knew she was particularly ticklish.

Bella's laughter rang out across the patio, Edward and Jasper's joining it as she squirmed to get away from them, Jasper preventing her from escaping. Edward tortured her for only a few moments, but was relieved to hear the laughter. She smacked them both across the chest when she settled down, and they both just hugged her as they fell quiet.

"Thanks," she said softly after a moment.

Edward kissed her gently, happy to have given her a distraction, small and momentary as it may have been. Jasper hugged her closer, nearly spooning up to her. They had spread out slightly, taking up more of the chair.

Bella sighed after a moment. "I should get back inside," she said quietly. "We need to start dinner."

"Let us know if you need any help, 'kay?" Edward said.

"We'll be okay, but thanks. I think we're going to use the time to talk, even though we should really kick Esme out of the kitchen," Bella said. She kissed them each softly and slid from the chair. Edward watched as she walked back inside to be folded into Rosalie's arms before they disappeared from view.

"Maybe we should stay here tonight?" Jasper said quietly, sliding back into the space that Bella had vacated. "One more night together?"

"Yeah, that's probably a good idea," Edward agreed. "I'm not sure I'd sleep tonight on my own."

"Me either," Jasper said quietly. "We should probably go back inside," he said after a moment.

"Yeah." Edward sighed softly. "Is it weird that I don't to?"

"No. It's easy to pretend that we don't have to face anything when we're out here by ourselves," Jasper counseled.

Edward just nodded. Jasper kissed him sweetly, cupping Edward's face in his hands. Edward returned the kiss, leaning into Jasper just a bit. Jasper broke the kiss, drawing away with several shorter presses of his lips to Edward's, before resting his forehead against Edward's. "I love you," Jasper whispered. "And we'll get through this together."

"I love you, too," Edward said softly. "And I know we will."

They stayed that way for a minute until Jasper pulled away. "We should go in," he breathed.

Edward nodded, and they slid from the chair, Jasper taking Edward's free hand as they walked back inside. He hugged his mom from behind and kissed the top of her head where she sat at the bar in the kitchen while Bella and Rose started the preparation for dinner and Alice sat by with her mom. Edward was reminded of Christmas Eve morning, when he'd comforted Jasper on the back patio and brought him back through the kitchen bustling with the women preparing for dinner.

They joined the guys in the living room. The TV was on, but the mood was somber. Emmett didn't seem to be engaged with the program, and David and Carlisle were quietly watching. Jasper kissed Edward again and took the empty armchair. Edward passed his dad and uncle on the sofa and crossed to his brother.

"Hey. Bella asked me to run out and pick something up they forgot. Wanna go for a ride?" he asked. Of course he was lying. He needed to get his brother out of the house for awhile. Emmett may not have been completely emotionally repressed, but Edward knew him well enough to know that he wasn't likely to talk or show much more reaction than he already had in front of the rest of the family.

"Huh? Yeah, sure, I guess. Jasper's not going?" Emmett said after a beat, his eyes refocusing on Edward.

"Nope. C'mon," Edward said with a nod toward the door. "You're driving." He looked toward Jasper, who nodded. His partner knew what he was doing, and Edward followed Emmett to the door.

Edward didn't say anything until they were in the jeep and down the road toward the grocery store. "You doing okay?" he asked as they stopped at a red light.

Emmett sighed, and Edward watched his hands tighten around the steering wheel. "I dunno, bro," he said with another heavy sigh. "I mean. Fuck. It's mom," he said, like that explained everything. "It's not supposed to happen to your parents, y'know? I mean, it happens all the time, like all over the country, but you never even think that it could happen to someone you know, to your family," he said in a rush.

"Yeah, I know," Edward agreed.

"And I'm scared, Ed. I know dad's not worried, and mom's playing it off like nothing, but it's fucking _cancer_. How can she just sit there and ask us to pretend like nothing happened this morning? And calling in Aunt Emma and Uncle David, not letting us help? That's not right, Edward. She's our _mom_. We should be helping her get to treatment. You, me, Rosie, Jas, and Bells. Alice, too. We can make it work, we've all got prep-time, and if she's doing treatments here in Forks we could handle it." He slammed his palm against the steering wheel. "I just…I can't believe she just wants us to pretend like it's a normal day," he said, his voice a bit softer.

"I think she just wants us to know that nothing's going to change," Edward said thoughtfully. "That she's going to be fine and this is just a bump in the road to get over."

"Yeah, maybe. But fuck, man…," Emmett trailed off. "It's supposed to be her day," he muttered. "Not the day we all get shitty news and spend the rest of the day trying to figure shit out while attempting to be normal."

Edward snorted. "Em, really, you think you could ever describe out family as normal?"

"Well…fuck, you know what I mean," Emmett retorted with a roll of his eyes. "Everything's changed, but nothing has, y'know?" He turned into the parking lot of the grocery store.

"Yeah, I know," Edward said quietly. "It feels like one of those moments that you'll be able to always say you remember, like where you were when the Towers fell or something."

"Yeah," Emmett echoed. "I just don't want to lose my mom."

"Me either, Em."

Emmett parked and shut off the engine. "What do we need?"

"Hm? Oh, nothing," Edward admitted. "I just thought…well, getting you out of the house so we could talk," he said with a shrug.

"Thanks," Emmett said softly.

They sat in the car for a few minutes. "I think we're going to stay over tonight," Edward said softly. "Jas and Bella are shaken up almost as much as we are, if not more. Bad memories for them both," he murmured.

"Fuck. Yeah," Emmett agreed, scrubbing a large hand over his face. "How are they?"

Edward shrugged. "Dealing, I guess. Jasper was out on the patio for awhile, and Bella came and sat with us. I think they're both trying to be supportive, but Jasper watched his mom…" he trailed off with a shake of his head. "It's different, but the same, and I think we just need to be together tonight, and we can't do that in the dorms."

"Maybe Rosie and I will too. We could camp out?" Emmett suggested.

Edward shrugged again. "With as much as mom wants to pretend that everything's normal? I don't know that she'd go for that, but I know she'd never deny us just asking to stay over."

"Yeah, good point." Emmett went quiet for a moment. "Still, it's not a bad idea. I'll see if Rose wants to stay over tonight to. Alice can have the bed in the basement, or maybe she'll want to crash on the floor or your couch."

"I'll ask her. Or have Bella ask her," Edward said.

"We really don't need to go in for anything?" Emmett asked after another moment of quiet.

"Nope," Edward said with a laugh. "We can go back now, if you're ready."

"Bella's not forgetting dessert again, is she?"

"After the last time, I doubt she'll ever forget again," Edward said dryly.

"Heh. Hope not," Emmett said. He started the car, but before he put it in gear he spoke again. "I'm going to see about taking some of Friday off," he said. "I want to talk to dad and see what time her surgery is scheduled for."

Edward nodded. "Me too. I'm cancelling rehearsal, and Angela can get someone to cover my two classes."

"Jas and Bells?" Emmett asked as he shifted into reverse and turned to look over his shoulder.

"Dunno," Edward said with a shrug. "Jasper didn't say anything when we talked about it, so he probably won't. Besides, they've got full loads to deal with at the end of the term." He sighed. "We'll see what happens when we get to the end of the week."

Emmett nodded. "Okay." He was quiet for a moment. "Rose wants to think about postponing the wedding."

Edward nodded. He thought she might. "Mom won't let her."

Emmett sighed. "I know. But if she's going through treatment all the way up to, maybe even through the wedding, depending on when she actually starts…I want her to enjoy being mother of the groom, not to be so exhausted she won't be able to deal with it. Rose's parents can be hell to deal with, too," he said. "And I know Rose is gonna try not to be Bridezilla, but I'm not putting any bets down about her mom, man."

"I think, like a lot of things right now, we're just going to have to take things a few days at a time," Edward said. "Maybe we'll get her to change her mind on a few things, but tell Rose not to worry about the wedding too much. Bella and Alice will take over as much as possible, and Emma's going to be here, too." Edward paused. "Y'know, I never really gave much thought to family until we met Bella, then Jasper. It didn't occur to me what it could be like to not have any."

Emmett made a quiet sound of agreement.

"I'm really glad we're all here and so close," Edward said quietly. "We're going to be looking at houses this summer, the three of us. We're using your realtor, so if we end up in the same neighborhood, blame Rosalie."

Emmett snorted, but he was grinning. "That's cool, bro. Plans for the summer?"

"Not solid yet," Edward answered. "Jasper wants to travel a bit, and we're thinking about renting a home somewhere, so we're not crashing on everyone else's privacy and so we get some of our own, finally. I guess it'll depend on how fast we find a house we like with everything we want or will be easy enough to modify."

"I'm happy for you, Ed. Seriously, bro, the last year…" Emmett trailed off. "I missed my little brother, and it took awhile, but he's back," he said quietly.

"I know, Em. I'm-"

"You don't need to apologize," Emmett said, cutting him off. "We handled things differently, you an' me, but we ended up somewhat in the same place. I'm just glad you're happy again. Even if you're a bit of a freak," he threw in.

"Thanks, Emmett. Love you too," Edward said dryly as his brother pulled back up in front of the house.

"I do, y'know. We don't say it much, but…" Emmett trailed off again.

"Yeah, Em. I know," Edward said before sliding from the car.

"Doesn't keep me from doing this, though," Emmett said as he ruffled Edward's hair before pushing him (lightly) right between the shoulder blades, making him stumble.

Edward stuck his cane out and tripped him. "Don't fuck with the dude with the cane," he said in a lilting voice as he let himself back into the house.

"Language!" Esme scolded with a laugh.

* * *

There are pictures of things on the blog.

I know that it seems that this family never seems to get a break, but that's life. Yes, this fic has an HEA.


	58. Chapter 57: Boogeymen and Haircuts

**Thank you as always to naelany for the beta work. :)**

**I'm doing something I rarely do, which is split POVs in a chapter, but it kept it from being tiny that way. **

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The week after Mother's day was hard for Jasper to get through. Normally, being incredibly busy with classes and activities would keep Jasper's thoughts from wandering, but as the week progressed toward Esme's surgery, Jasper found himself increasingly distracted. The student body in general didn't know what was going on and Jasper tried his best to keep his thoughts under control during classes, but he wasn't always successful.

Mother's day had been difficult at best. Jasper had tried to respect Esme's wishes to keep everything normal, but her news, coupled with the first time he'd observed the holiday in a decade had nearly caused him to shut down again. Over breakfast he'd just pushed everything away, trying to be there for Edward. But once the family was gathered, trying to pretend it was just another day, the memories Jasper had been trying to keep at bay had crashed down over him, forcing him to retreat before he broke down in front of the rest of the family. He'd had several such moments over the course of the week, mostly in private, as he found himself mourning his mama all over again.

He knew the situations were completely different, but Jasper couldn't help the comparisons. As he'd said to Edward on Sunday morning, he didn't need to know that Jasper had been sitting on the patio remembering how he'd watched, from a distance because his transfer request had been denied, as his mother faded away from the disease that practically ate her alive. He didn't know that he was strong enough to endure that again, and he only hoped that Esme, Carlisle, and the doctors were right and he wouldn't have to.

Spending Sunday night with Edward and Bella had helped. They'd invited Alice to take Edward's couch so she wouldn't have to be alone on campus on in the basement, and so they'd gone to bed minimally clothed, but pressed as close together as possible after they'd sat up and talked after dinner.

But as the week drew on, it seemed that Edward's anxiety only fueled Jasper's own. Edward tried to apologize, and Jasper had had to draw him out on occasion, to keep him from withdrawing completely from the rest of them. Edward had gotten Angela to clear his schedule for Friday so he could be with his parents and aunt and uncle at the hospital, and Emmett found a sub for his afternoon classes. Bella had wanted to go, but she and the girls had already made hotel reservations for Friday night in Portland so they could shop on Saturday, and meet Alice's Charlotte.

Jasper did his level best to distract himself and Bella by working with her to put together the massive collaborative activity that they'd talked about on Friday night. By the end of the week they had most of the kinks ironed out and Jasper had gotten most of the materials prepared and sent off to be made into packets with Bella's approval.

Thursday night, Jasper purged many of his worries and fears to Dr. Jones. They talked about his issues of abandonment, and how he felt after his mama died, and then after he'd been discharged from the Marine's. The hour session wasn't enough for Dr. Jones to get too far into things, but Jasper knew the stage was set for her to approach the topic in future sessions.

History club was winding down and they only spent a small amount of time discussing their actual topic for the day. The rest of the meeting was used to discuss the end of the year party and the booth they'd have at the Day on the Green event on the last Friday before classes.

Jasper faced an odd wave of déjà vu when he found Edward in his room when he got back. "Hey. Everything okay?" Jasper asked as he took in Edward sitting on his bed, slightly curled in on himself.

"Yeah," Edward answered quietly. "I just didn't want to be by myself tonight, and Alice is distracting Bella by helping her research ways to donate the hair she wants to cut off and other girly things, and-"

"Hey," Jasper said again, cutting him off as he dropped his bag on the table and crossed to the bed. "You don't have to give me any excuses," he said gently. "I wouldn't want to be alone tonight, either." He sat next to Edward and felt the other man lean into him. Jasper lifted his arm and let Edward tuck himself underneath.

They sat quietly for a few minutes until Edward let out a shuddering sigh.

Jasper kissed the top of his head. "It's going to be okay, you know," he said softly. "It's a semi-routine surgery."

"I know," Edward answered. "But there's still so much that could go wrong…"

"It won't," Jasper said firmly. Esme was in great physical shape and there was no reason to think that there would be any complications during the surgery. "She's still young, and healthy, and you know Carlisle found her the best surgeon he could without going to Seattle."

"I know," Edward responded softly. "But she's my mom, Jas."

Jasper nodded. "I know, baby." He took a deep breath. "I was on the other side of the country when my mama was diagnosed," he said quietly. "I couldn't get leave to be there with her for the first surgery, but I was able to visit before she started chemo. I thought my mom was a strong woman after we lost dad and Amber, but that was nothing to the way she tried to be strong for me while she was going through treatment. I was distant from it, mostly, only getting to visit every few months, but I'm not going to lie to you, Edward, watching her slowly waste away after the cancer spread was one of the hardest things I've ever had to go through." Jasper paused, hugging Edward a bit closer and taking another deep breath.

"Esme's tumor is different. I have to believe that the doctors are right and it hasn't and won't spread because they've caught it in time," he said quietly, but with conviction in his voice. "Esme is an incredibly strong woman, baby, I don't have to tell you that. She's not going to sit back and take this without fighting back. She's going to get through surgery just fine, she's going to get through the treatments, and she's going to win. I have to believe that, Edward, because I don't know that I can let myself think about any alternative."

Jasper felt Edward's arms wind around his waist. "I know," Edward whispered again. "And I'm trying to make myself remember and believe that, but every so often, all I hear running through my head is that my mom has cancer, and it makes me feel like a little kid, afraid of the boogeyman that's going to jump out of my closet."

Jasper tilted his head to one side and rested his cheek against Edward's hair. "Strange, isn't it, how our boogeymen change as we get older, but they're still there? When we're kids they're the monsters from our dreams, as we grow they become things that get more realistic. Cancer is like the ultimate boogeyman of our generation. Cancer and Alzheimer's," Jasper said with a sigh.

Edward shivered against him. "Ever wish you could just go back in time and freeze things the way they were, at a point when life was easy and you didn't have to worry about anything?"

"Sometimes," Jasper acknowledged. "But then I wouldn't have met you and Bella. But I get what you're saying."

Edward nodded. "As a kid you think your parents are indestructible and infallible. At least mine were," he said with a bit of lightness in his voice. "Weeks like this I don't like being part of the grown up world, with grown up problems, and knowing that my parents are just as human as everyone else."

"I remember feeling like that a lot when daddy and Amber died, and again when mama first got sick," Jasper acknowledged. "I think it's just another part of being a grown up."

"Being a grown up sucks," Edward grumped, and Jasper couldn't help but laugh.

"Not all of it," Jasper said softly, bending and shifting to kiss Edward gently.

"Point," Edward said after Jasper sat back.

Jasper kissed him again softly. "I'm going to change. What time do you need to be at the hospital tomorrow?"

"She and dad are going in at eight," Edward answered with a sigh. "I'm not sure. Probably after she goes in; she's scheduled for nine. I'll keep dad company."

Jasper nodded and rose, crossing to his bureau for a pair of pajama pants and changed, tossing his dirty clothes in the hamper that was dangerously close to overflowing. He went into the kitchenette and raided the pantry cupboards that he and Emmett shared, finding an opened package of Oreos. He grabbed those and a couple bottles of water and rejoined Edward on the bed.

They rearranged themselves so they were stretched out a bit, Edward reclining against Jasper's chest between his outstretched legs. The cookies slowly disappeared as they watched a movie, Jasper trying to find something to distract them both. It was late when the both finally fell asleep.

Jasper woke Edward when he got ready to leave at 8:15. He'd skipped the gym, wanting to spend as much time wit Edward that morning before classes. He had a granola bar from his stash for breakfast, and kissed a bleary eyed Edward when he left for his office.

Throughout the day, Jasper was never far from his phone. Just after noon, while Jasper was in line to pay for his and Bella's lunches, his phone buzzed in his pocket.

_surgery went great. moms in recovery. not awake yet. should be released couple hours after wakes up. luv u_

He couldn't respond with his hands full, so once he'd paid, he set the boxes on a table and texted back.

_great news. call me later if you want me to come over or when you come back to school. luv u too_

Jasper gathered everything up and started to make his way back across campus to the office. His phone buzzed again, and he fished it from his pocket, balancing the boxes in one hand.

_ur not coming over?_

Jasper waited to reply until he was back in the office. Bella was smiling brightly and she jumped up to give him a hug when he entered the room, and he wrapped his arms around her after he slid their lunch onto her desk. He held her quietly for a long moment until her phone made a noise, and Jasper let her go to answer it.

He sent Edward another message.

_if esmes up to it ill come over tonight .if not ill come by 2mrw_

Jasper tossed his phone onto his desk and took the student chair at Bella's and began opening their lunches. He'd gotten them both fairly light meals of soup and sandwiches, not knowing when he bought it when they could expect to hear from Edward, and though he was hungry, he didn't want anything heavy and assumed that Bella wouldn't either.

"Okay. Okay. I'll tell him. Love you, too. Bye." Bella tossed her phone onto her desk and smiled at Jasper. "Edward says okay, he understands, and he'll probably see you tonight. I'm sorry we're going out of town, or I'd stay, too," she said, reaching for the turkey on wheat.

"It's alright, I was prepared to keep myself occupied tonight," Jasper said, taking the other sandwich, roast beef. "Are you looking forward to going?"

Bella shrugged, unwrapping her spoon. "Yes and no. Alice's so much happier when she's planning to see Charlotte, but I'm not so much looking forward to the actual shopping."

Jasper laughed quietly.

"But it will be nice to get away with the girls this weekend. I'm sad Esme couldn't come with us, of course, but it'll be a nice distraction. Plus, I'll get to help Alice pick out your tux. Did you send her your measurements?"

"Yes, dear," Jasper answered playfully. He'd submitted everything Alice had asked for.

Bella brandished her spoon at him. "Don't sass me," she scolded, but her eyes were twinkling with good humor and Jasper just laughed. It felt good to laugh, and relax, knowing he'd been right about the surgery. Of course, there was still the hurdle of making sure the surgeon had gotten all the cancerous tissue and enduring the radiation, but Jasper was content to focus on the immediate small victory for the moment.

"Or what, you're going to take me over your knee? I'll find you a wooden spoon like my mama had," he offered, waggling his eyebrows at her.

Bella dissolved into giggles, and through her laughter she told him about Carlisle's threat to do just that to her.

"So what are you going to do tonight?" Bella asked once they recovered from their laughter.

Jasper shrugged, putting the top back on his empty cup of soup. "Probably just hang out and read or watch movies. I hadn't thought about it, to be honest; I wanted to see how things went today, first."

The reminder sobered them slightly. "Yeah," Bella said softly. "You know Esme wouldn't mind if you went to the house tonight."

Jasper nodded. "Yeah, but I want to give them some time, and I really don't want her thinking she needs to fuss over someone else. I'll be fine; I'll grab a quiet dinner at the dining hall and just hang out until Edward comes back or calls me. I've spent plenty of evenings alone, darlin'. It's not a big deal."

She nodded. "Except that the rest of us are going to be with people tonight," she reminded him.

He rose out of his chair slightly and kissed her. "I'll be fine," he promised. "Go with the girls and have fun. If Edward calls, I'll go to the house. If he doesn't, I'll have a quiet night. Don't worry about me, alright?"

"Okay," she promised with a nod. "But that doesn't mean that I'm not going to annoy the crap out of you with text messages when Alice sneaks off with Charlotte and Rosalie starts pressing me for details about our sex life."

Jasper laughed again. "Alright. I'll look forward to it."

They finished their lunch and Jasper kissed her again softly before they went to class. The afternoon seemed easier than the morning and he could only attribute it to having confirmation that Esme was out of surgery and recovering.

At the end of classes for the day, Bella kissed Jasper before she left the office with Alice, heading to their room to get their bags and meeting Rose to leave for Portland. He wished them a safe drive and kissed Alice's cheek when she tilted her face up expectantly after he kissed Bella goodbye.

Once they'd left, Jasper gathered his things and packed up for the weekend. He wasn't sure what the plans would be for the time off. He could only assume that they'd still be having dinner at the Cullens' on Saturday like normal, but he'd wait to ask Edward whenever he spoke to him next.

Since he was eating alone he took the time to run back by his room to drop off his bag before he went to the dining hall. After getting his meal of meatloaf and potatoes, he found a small table in a quiet corner out of the way and idly observed the students and other faculty around him as he ate. There was a definite atmosphere of 'OMG it's FRIDAY' throughout the student body as they talked loudly and with a lot of laughter.

When he finished eating, Jasper strolled back to the dorm. He changed into a pair of sweatpants and a hoodie, cracked his door open to let his students know that he was home and available, and grabbed his laptop and the small stack of movies he had from Netflix. He picked one and settled on the bed, his phone within easy reach because he knew it was only a matter of time before Edward called.

xxx

Bella was relieved when she got the text message Friday while Jasper was at lunch that Esme was out of surgery and doing fine in recovery. She hadn't anticipated anything else, really, but with as fast as Renee's cancer had progressed, she wasn't totally sure what she could expect in terms of the treatments. It felt like a weight had been lifted off her chest, and the trip to Portland for the weekend of shopping was cast into a whole new light in Bella's mind; she felt a bit more free to enjoy herself without feeling guilty about doing so.

Alice had already packed for the weekend, excited to see her new friend again, but Bella had waited. She threw two skeins of a super soft 'homespun' yarn into her duffel bag; she'd taken Jasper's words from Sunday into consideration and had ordered more of some of her favorite to make a prayer shawl for Esme. She'd nearly ordered more of the lovely cashmere she'd made into the sweater for Mother's Day, but had decided that an acrylic would be better, since it'd be washable. Hopefully, it would work up quickly, so that Bella could give it to her before she started the radiation therapy. She wanted to try to teach everyone a little bit of crochet so they could work on small parts, too; she wanted it to be from everyone, not just herself. She was hoping that maybe she could resurrect the Sunday gatherings they used to have on campus so she could teach them all at once.

She packed simply. The plan was to spend Saturday shopping, meeting up with Charlotte for dinner, then meeting up again with Alice and Charlotte for brunch on Sunday morning. If they needed to find anything else they'd do it before they left on Sunday, planning to be home in time for the campus dinner. Once she had everything she needed she went through the shared space into Alice's side of the suite. "Ready?"

"Yup!" Alice shouldered her bag and purse and they headed out, meeting Rose downstairs.

Rose was driving, so Bella took the backseat of her car while Alice sat up front, and she took out the printed instructions she needed, getting started on the shawl in car.

"Did you guys hear from Edward or Emmett today?" Rosalie asked. "Emmett called me during my prep period after lunch."

"Edward texted me and Jasper at lunch," Bella answered.

"Mom called me," Alice said. "She was relieved that things had gone well, though she had been trying to stay positive."

"Yeah," Bella said, mentally counting her stitches. "It's been really hard on Jasper. He's trying so hard to be positive for Edward, but every so often I catch him just looking haunted," she said.

"Is he going to be alright tonight?" Alice asked.

"He says he is," Bella answered with a sigh. "But I'm hoping Edward calls him and asks him to go over to the house so he doesn't sit around and mope all night without sleeping."

"Why doesn't he just go over?" Rose asked.

"He doesn't want to be in the way, or make Esme think she needs to fuss when she had surgery this morning," Bella explained. "He's probably right, since she's probably already fighting Emma and Carlisle tooth and nail. Besides, I think he wants to give them time as a family."

"Doesn't that boy understand that he _is_ family?" Rosalie asked. "As much as you and I are?" She sighed, too. "But he's probably right, knowing Esme."

"How's Emmett doing with everything?" Alice asked.

Rose shrugged. "Angry, mostly. He feels like the family has been through enough in the last several years. And I think he's scared, which is natural. I just wish I could do more to help him process everything. He's been spending a bit of extra time in the gym beating the crap out of the punching bag. I know he talked to Edward a bit on Sunday, but…" she sighed. "We'll get through it. He won't let me think about postponing the wedding, either."

"Esme probably wouldn't like that," Alice said. "She's not going to want to disrupt any plans."

"I know," Rose said with a sigh. "I keep telling myself that it'll be okay, but…" she sighed again. "I'm dealing with it. Thankfully everything's mostly planned, and Esme doesn't have a lot to do. I'm just worried about my mom running ram shod over the whole thing and Esme doesn't need my mom's bitch-side out to play on top of everything else."

"So just go all bride-zilla and trump them all," Alice said with a laugh. "You'd be entitled."

"Believe me, I've thought about it," Rosalie said with a sigh. "Please promise me the two of you will run as much interference as you can get away with?"

"Of course," Bella answered immediately. "Though you know if your mom get's too far out of control we can probably just get Carlisle to sedate her."

Rose and Alice laughed loudly at that. The conversation slowly shifted more toward summer plans and the future. Rose and Emmett had found three houses that they were considering making offers on, and Bella explained that they'd begun the process of finding a house of their own. That led to questions of weddings and whatnot and Bella had to explain that they hadn't gotten that far, but had discussed finding an attorney to help them figure some stuff out. They stopped for dinner in Centralia before continuing on to Portland.

Alice stayed with Rose and Bella at the hotel Friday night, all three of them attached to phones as they watched TV and texted their significant others until they pretty much collapsed, exhausted from the stress of the week and the drive.

Alice had them up and ready to shop by nine in the morning. Bella had, to Alice's dismay and Rose's amusement, dressed in a pair of comfortable jeans, a hoodie stolen from Jasper (which meant it was at least two sizes too big, and she did have a long-sleeved skinny t-shirt underneath), and her black Chuck Taylors.

"You're going to drag me from store to shop to boutique and make me try on an endless number of dresses," Bella explained as she laced up her shoes. "It's been a long week. I want to be comfortable while I go through this torture," she said.

Rose snickered beside her. "Oh, leave her alone, Alice. She's going to cut her hair, at least."

Alice heaved a huge sigh. "I guess."

Bella was getting her hair cut; it was the first appointment for the day in the hotel salon (they were back in the same place Bella had stayed when she'd visited with Alice before). "Alright," she said, standing, reaching for her purse and the large zip-top bag she'd brought with her to collect her hair. "Let's get this over with."

Bella literally could not remember the last time she'd had her hair cut. She trimmed the ends regularly, or had Alice do it, so she was a little nervous to have a foot of hair cut off. But it was going to a good cause; when they got back to Forks she'd be shipping it off to Locks of Love.

In the salon, Bella handed the stylist the bag for the clippings, explaining what she wanted done with her hair, Alice chiming in. She wanted to leave some length, but lighten it up layers. The stylist pulled her hair back into a low tail with a rubber band and measured it to an even foot, showing Bella that her hair would still be slightly longer than shoulder length at the longest point.

With a silent nod, Bella gave her permission, and the stylist separated the tail into three sections, tied them off, and cut. Alice made a happy little squeak and Rose just smiled, leaning against the counter.

"Here you are lovely," the stylist said, handing Bella her baggie with three foot long tails of dark brown hair coiled inside. "So tell me gorgeous, why the change?" he asked as he began working Bella's hair into sections for the styling.

Alice giggled and Rose laughed outright, and Bella blushed, which only prompted more of both. But they had a good time, and Bella was immensely pleased with her hair when all was said in done. The shortest pieces curled under her chin and the longest still brushed her shoulder blades. It was lighter, and Bella knew she'd be able to work with it in the mornings without adding any time to her routine.

True to Bella's prediction, Alice dragged her (and a slightly more willing Rosalie) around the mall, shops, and boutiques. Bella found her dress at Nordstrom's in the prom section, and had to choose the dress in a gradient black or gradient blue. She and Alice discussed it, and she decided on the blue, with a strappy silver one-inch heel to go with it.

Alice had already made her dress, something pink and flowy with a slit and a something else Bella hadn't understood. Rosalie found a gorgeous red dress that she just fell in love with, and they picked out two dresses for Esme. They talked about it and knew she hadn't decided to go to Prom with them or not, but Alice said that the dresses would work for other occasions too, so the expense was worth it in her eyes.

When they finished outfitting themselves, they found a men's store to get the things they needed for their guys. Edward and Emmett already had tuxedos, so Rosalie found the accessories she needed to match, while Alice and Bella poured over what to get for Jasper that would suit his style as well as go with what Edward already had and Bella's dress. Alice picked out vests and ties for Edward and Jasper in different shades of blue that still went with Bella's dress. Edward got a bow-tie, Jasper a regular silk necktie. For Jasper, she purchased a pair of trousers and a jacket that had a slightly longer cut to it, and a white shirt that had a subtle silver pin striping to it. Bella looked forward to seeing him in it.

As something special for her guys, Bella stopped at a jewelry store and picked out cufflinks and the other accessories to match. Alice gave her approval on everything and when Bella had paid, they were finished with their mission for the day, with just enough time for them to get to the restaurant where they were supposed to meet Charlotte.

It was one of those chain places which was comfortable at least. They were seated in a booth, and Bella sat on one side with Rose and they traded a look when they saw how happy Alice was to see Charlotte.

"It's nice to see you again, Bella," Charlotte greeted her as they got settled. "I hear it's been something of a long week." She had a slight Spanish accent, which Bella had to admit was kind of sexy. Charlotte was about Bella's height, slightly thicker, dark skinned and haired, of Hispanic descent if Bella had to guess. She had large brown eyes framed by thick lashes and though Bella had only met her the once before, she seemed to smile a lot. She was good for Alice.

"It has, but we got good news," Bella answered. "How have you been, Char?"

Rosalie cleared her throat less than subtly at Bella's side. "Oh, sorry," Alice jumped in. "Charlotte Alvarez, this is my soon to be cousin-in-law, Rosalie Hale. She's engaged to my cousin Emmett."

"Nice to meet you, Rosalie," Charlotte said, extending her hand across the table.

"You, too. I've heard a lot about you," Rose responded.

"Good, I hope?"

"Mostly," Rosalie answered, teasing, and they all laughed.

When their server came around, Bella just ordered water; she'd had a hard enough time sleeping throughout the week and she didn't want to add caffeine to the mix so she'd actually be able to sleep when they got back to the hotel. Also, it let Rosalie have a cosmo, since Bella could make their way back to the hotel (she was sure that they all expected Alice to go home with Charlotte).

They got to know Charlotte a bit better as they shared an order of warm spinach dip and tortilla chips. Her parents were from Honduras, but Charlotte and her sister Vanessa had been born in Southern California, and had grown up speaking Spanish and English, which was how she'd gotten the accent. She studied politics and economics as an undergraduate at UCLA, and was in the early stages of working on her dissertation at Portland State in Public Policy Administration.

Charlotte was very easy to talk to, and Bella found that they all relaxed as their food came and they got to know each other. Alice picked up the tab for dinner, and they said their goodbyes in the parking lot, Alice leaving Rose and Bella with a wink and a grin, and Bella drove back to the hotel.

She and Rose spent the night talking and watching movies on cable between texting back and forth with the guys. Esme was doing okay, and already driving everyone nuts trying to get back to doing everything around the house, to Edward and Jasper's amusement, but Carlisle's frustration.

At brunch on Sunday Charlotte slipped Bella her email and phone number. "I've been where you're all at right now," she said quietly while Rose and Alice argued something. "So if you need to talk, or Alice needs…anything…" she trailed off.

"Thanks, Charlotte," Bella said, tucking the paper away in her jeans. "Maybe we'll get you up to Forks someday to meet everyone else."

"Have to admit, I'm really interested in meeting those guys of yours," she teased with a leer, and Bella blushed, to the amusement of all.

The drive home on Sunday was comfortable. Rose turned up the radio and they sang along as Bella worked on the shawl and they sometimes talked about memories behind particular songs.

At dinner Sunday night, Bella asked if they could all go back to her room for awhile after dinner. Everyone agreed, and once back there, she set out explaining what she wanted to do. Though Emmett bitched a bit about doing something 'girly,' they all seemed to understand what Bella was after, and all agreed that the concept was one they liked. Everyone (even Emmett) all listened patiently and watched her demonstration, practicing with a bit of junk yarn she had and their own hooks. A couple of hours later, when everyone was happy with their new (albeit limited) skills, she sent everyone off with their own instructions, hook, and the first two rows already completed, attached to a length of yarn she'd separated from the skeins so the shawl wouldn't end up huge.

After she'd kissed Jasper and Edward good night she settled onto her bed, curling her legs up underneath her and continuing to work on the main portion of the shawl as she set up a movie on her computer, and lost herself in the fantasy world on the screen and the rhythm of her hook and yarn.


	59. Chapter 58: Prom

**Thanks as always to Naelany for the beta work. :)**

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With prom signaling the official coming of the end of the year, Bella had a hard time keeping her upper level students focused, especially toward the end of the week. By the end of classes on Wednesday she decided she was showing movies in all her classes for the last two days of the week; it wasn't worth her aggravation to try to drum lessons into them when they clearly weren't interested in paying attention.

At dinner, Jasper expressed similar frustration and revealed a similar game plan to get his students through the week, only he'd tacked on a bit of bribery; he'd let the students watch a movie, but they'd have to take a quiz on it on Monday. Bella was surprised he'd gotten them to agree to that. Even with the joint project they had underway, the movies they'd chosen would work right in.

But with only two weeks of classes after prom, they'd been willing to do just about whatever it took to get the students to make it until the last day of classes. Once they hit finals week, it was off the teachers' shoulders.

Bella was also excited about prom, but likely for reasons different from her students'. Though she'd attended Forks Academy's prom twice before, as all the in-residence faculty were required to chaperone, she expected it to be different, with Edward and Jasper. She couldn't wait to see Jasper in the tuxedo she and Alice had picked out, and Edward had assured her that he'd made arrangements for them to get off campus for the night, and not to his parents' house, after making sure that none of them were on-call for the weekend.

Esme and Carlisle still weren't sure, as of Thursday evening when Bella called, if they were going to attend. It was a week since her surgery, but they hadn't gotten the results of the biopsy on the tissue they'd removed. She hadn't begun treatment yet, either; they'd found out that she wouldn't start receiving radiation until after her incision had completely healed, as long as eight weeks.

Rosalie, Bella knew, had been especially relieved at that news. With the wedding six weeks away, she said she didn't have to worry as much about Esme and her mother not getting along. Bella also knew, however, that Rose's relief wasn't purely altruistic; it was her wedding, and she wanted the attention, and probably rightly so, on herself. Not that Esme would steal her thunder by any means, but for all her confidence in some things, Rosie could still be incredibly insecure sometimes, so Esme's relative health for the wedding was a good thing all around. Emmett wouldn't be fussing over her, and Esme wouldn't be chided (as much) for helping wherever she felt she was needed. And Bella herself was greatly relieved, even though she'd promised, to not have to run interference for Mother Hale (though she probably still would).

There was pretty much a mad dash from classrooms Friday afternoon. Bella chucked quietly to herself as she watched her students flee and she shut down the smart system she'd used to show the movie. She really couldn't blame them; she was ready for the weekend, too. Friday afternoon meant no office hours, but she and Jasper generally used the hour after classes when Edward was still in rehearsal to finish up anything left from the week, or just bum around the office. More than once she'd caught Jasper with his feet up on his desk reading a novel that had nothing to do with classes or lost in thought with his headphones on.

Jasper wasn't in yet when Bella arrived back in the office and she dropped her bag on the floor near her desk before flopping into her chair with a sigh. She hooked the student chair with one of her feet and tugged it closer, propping her feet up on the edge and reclining back in her seat, tipping her head up to look at the ceiling. In some ways, she couldn't believe that the past nine months had gone both so quickly and dragged on as long as they had.

In September, she honestly would never have thought that not only would she have broken up with James, but found herself with two loving, considerate, wonderful men who seemed to only want to make her happy. At the beginning of the year Bella didn't know that she'd ever see Edward as anything other than a beautifully withdrawn artist, damaged far beyond just physically from the accident that had occurred before she'd even met him.

But so much had changed in nine months. Rose and Emmett were engaged, and Alice had met someone new who seemed to click much better than Kate had with everyone else (though Bella knew that Charlotte had yet to meet the guys). Edward was healing and happy, James was forever gone from her life, and Bella could only attribute both of those things to Jasper. She'd had people come and go throughout her life, but she could honestly say that she was grateful for Jasper's appearance back in the fall. She wasn't sure she wanted to think about where she'd be without him.

Bella heard the door to the office open and close, but she remained reclined with her eyes closed listening to Jasper (presumably) moving around the office until she could feel him just behind her (okay, so she heard the subtle squeak of her desk as he perched on it).

"Whatcha doin' darlin'?" he asked quietly, and she felt his fingers lightly combing through her hair.

"Thinking," she replied simply.

"Good thoughts?" his voice was low and warm in her ear and she smiled softly.

"Mmhm. Mostly."

"That's all that matters, then."

Bella heard him stand, and then his lips were pressed lightly against hers, and she opened her eyes to slits to see him looking back down at her, upside down, a grin on his face.

"Edward's gonna come get us when he's done with rehearsal," he said before kissing her again lightly. "Go back to your thinkin'."

"Kay," she answered to his quiet laughter. She should have started writing her exams for finals, or reviewing the review materials to make sure they were still relevant. There were any number of things Bella should have done for the hour they had until Edward got them for dinner, but instead, she was content to sit back and let her thoughts wander as she listened to Jasper occupy himself.

It didn't come as any great surprise when she realized she was happy, though she supposed with all the recent events in her life, she could have been. It was hard for her to believe sometimes that it had only been two and a half months since James had taken her conference hostage. The nightmares still came, sometimes, but Bella had been managing to sleep on her own, without medication, since after Spring Break. Dr. Stevens had agreed when Bella suggested going back to once a week appointments again, both because she didn't feel like she needed both anymore, but also because it ate into her time with Jasper and Edward on Saturday mornings. It surprised her, slightly, that Dr. Stevens had so totally agreed on the second point; she felt Bella's relationships with Jasper and Edward were more valuable to her long term well being.

All in all, Bella thought her life was on track. Though she'd thought about a home and family in recent years she hadn't given it any serious thought up to that point. James hadn't wanted children, and he seemed too content in his bachelor pad for Bella to have brought up their living together (beyond the one time that she had), which left the idea of a home temporarily placed on the back burner, because the thought of buying a home for herself had seemed excessive when she could continue to, mostly, happily live on campus with the rest of her adopted family.

But she could sense that part of her life coming to a close. Rosalie's realtor, a lovely woman named Carmen, had emailed Bella ten listings that she was looking forward to sharing with the guys, as soon as they had some time. She knew Edward had gotten them a hotel for Saturday after prom, so she was hoping that maybe Saturday during the day, or on Sunday. Either way, they were moving forward, and though she was glad to be beginning to feel like an adult, she was still a bit scared.

Maintaining a relationship with one person was difficult, and she had no hesitations about it being doubly, if not triply hard with the three of them. For all their similarities, they could be remarkably different people, and she knew that their living together would be a big adjustment for all three of them. But she knew that the benefits would far outweigh the drawbacks, and as she'd told them, they couldn't expect things to be perfect all the time. But they'd figure things out.

"Hey, sweetheart," Jasper called quietly. "Edward just sent me a text. He's running a few minutes late. Wanna start packing up? I'll let him know we'll meet him at the dining hall."

"Okay," she said, opening her eyes and slowly sitting up and letting her feet slip from the chair where she'd propped them. After giving her eyes a minute to adjust she reached for her bag. She dumped all the papers on her desk and after checking her email, put her computer into standby and slipped it into her bag.

"That's all you're taking?" Jasper asked, laughter in his voice.

Bella nodded as she rose. "It's not like I'm going to work on anything before Sunday at the earliest anyway," she retorted. "If then. It's likely to just sit until Monday and why drag it across campus twice?"

Jasper looked thoughtful for a moment. "Good point." He held out his hand for her. "Ready?"

"Yep." She slung her bag over her shoulder and took Jasper's hand, following him out of the room and building. Bella slid her hand up to Jasper's elbow as they walked and leaned into him a little, the wind having picked up slightly since she'd gotten into the building that morning. She wished she'd worn a heavier jacket.

When they got to the cafeteria, they went ahead and scanned their cards through and grabbed trays. Bella got in line for the breakfast for dinner, eying the made to order waffles and strawberries with cream. She felt a tug on her hair as she waited and smiled as she turned toward Edward, walking past with his own tray. When it was finally her turn, she passed on the pre-made scrambled eggs but got a couple pieces of bacon to go with her waffle. She dished up a small bowl of fruit salad from the salad bar and poured herself a glass of milk and went in search of the others.

She took her regular seat between Jasper and Edward at the round table where everyone else was seated. Jasper had grabbed pizza and a salad, and Edward had put together a peanut butter and jelly sandwich with a side of macaroni and cheese, clearly indulging his inner child.

"Ready for the weekend?" Alice asked as Bella got settled.

"Yes," Jasper and Bella answered together, to laughter.

"Hopefully this weekend will give us all a chance to recharge before the last two weeks," Rosalie said. "What's everyone doing after the dance on Saturday? We're going back to the house, right?" she asked Emmett.

"Yup," he answered.

Alice shrugged. "I may just stay here."

"We've got a hotel room," Edward answered quietly.

"Really?" Jasper asked. Bella'd forgotten that she had let Edward make the arrangements while she'd taken care of a few other things on her own, including the dinner reservations for the group on Saturday night.

"Yeah, I thought maybe it'd be nice for us to get another chance to have some privacy," Edward said with nod. "And mom doesn't need a full house on Sunday morning."

"Good idea," Jasper answered with a smile.

Bella smiled and nudged his calf under the table. She was looking forward to it, too.

"Is Charlotte coming up?" Rosalie asked Alice.

"No," Alice said, sounding disappointed. "She was busy this weekend."

Bella focused on chewing the bite of waffle and strawberry in her mouth.

"Sorry, Ali," Rose said softly.

Alice shrugged. "It's okay. I'll just have to steal some of Edward and Jasper's companionship for the night," she said a bit more brightly.

"You don't have to steal it," Edward said with a grin. "I'm fairly sure we can share."

"Just be careful what you're sharing," Bella said, teasing, to everyone's laughter.

"Well, since you boys have gotten a hotel room," Alice said, "I think you should let us girls have the house Saturday afternoon to get ready, and you can pick us up there before dinner. How's that sound?"

Emmett, Jasper and Edward all glanced at each other and shrugged. "Sure," Jasper answered for all of them.

Bella had delivered Jasper's tux when they'd returned from Portland the previous weekend (having paid extra for the rush alterations so she and Alice were able to pick it up Sunday on their way home), and Edward had already asked Esme to get one of his out at the house for him, and said he'd swing by Saturday on their way to the hotel.

They continued chatting over dessert, talking about some of their final plans for the year, until the dining hall staff chased them from the building.

Alice wanted to do pre-prom primping and girls' night, so Bella walked with her and Rose back to their dorm, leaving the boys on their own on a Friday night once again.

Back in their building, she, Rose, and Alice opened a bottle of wine and watched a couple of girly movies as they painted nails and toes and applied whatever beauty rituals they felt were necessary (Rose did a mask, Alice some kind of peel while Bella just rolled her eyes and wiggled her toes spaced apart by cotton). Once her nails were dry, Bella made her way carefully through the adjoining space from Alice's room and got ready for bed, sighing quietly as she slid between the sheets, snuggling down amongst her blankets and pillows, finding sleep easily.

Bella stretched, enjoying the opportunity to sleep in on a Saturday morning in her own bed. It had been a considerable amount of time since she'd last been able to really soak up a quiet morning on her own. After lying in bed for a bit, dozing, she pulled herself from the comfortable nest she'd built amongst the sheets through the night and went into the kitchen to turn on the kettle for tea. She, Alice, and Rose were going over to the house in the early afternoon; they had reservations for an early dinner because Rosalie needed to back on campus before the dance started to sort out any last minute details.

After one cup of tea and some indulgent novel reading, Bella hopped into the shower, shaving carefully and thoroughly washing and conditioning her hair. She moisturized everything once she was out of the shower, let her hair dry naturally after running a comb through it, and tugged on casual clothes for a quick trip to the dining hall for brunch, her novel along for company. Though she wasn't used to eating alone much anymore, she enjoyed the leisurely brunch and the chance to read.

Back in her room after brunch, she packed up everything she'd need for the night and next day, because they were staying over at a hotel and she didn't anticipate getting back to campus early in the day, or relish doing a walk of shame in her prom dress.

Early in the afternoon, Bella headed over to the Cullens' while the guys went to the hotel to check in and get dressed. Emmett and Rose had their own plans for after the dance, but Jasper and Edward had welcomed him along to make it seem like an appropriate date with them to pick up their dates at the house. Bella carried her dress over in the garment bag they'd given her when she purchased it, and was dressed comfortably in yoga pants and a sweater.

She and Alice rode separately from Rosalie, each having different plans for after the dance, though Alice had been noticeably close lipped about hers, and Bella would be going with Edward and Jasper in Edward's car. When they arrived, Esme and Emma seemed prepared to fuss, and had wine and light snacks on hand for the long afternoon of primping ahead. Bella was glad to not be on call for the evening and be stuck on campus to get ready (and after the dance). Alice helped to get her hair swept off her face and curling down her back, held with sparkling clips borrowed from Esme.

Bella did her own makeup, keeping it mostly light and natural with a smoky line around her eyes. She helped Alice with Rose's hair, handing her things as she asked for them as they talked and drank and kept the mother figures amused.

They were just finished with Rose when they heard the doorbell ring. Bella glanced at the clock in the guest room they'd taken over; the boys weren't supposed to be there for another hour yet. She shrugged when Rosalie looked back over her shoulder, but she had a feeling she'd known who had arrived.

Bella had abused Charlotte's gift of her email address and had invited her, without telling Alice, to the prom. Alice had planned on going stag, as it were, but Bella thought she might appreciate the surprise and Charlotte had seemed excited enough to forgo studying for the weekend and drive up.

"Alice?" Carlisle called from downstairs. "It's for you!"

Alice frowned as she dropped Rose's hair brush back into the bag on the floor. "For me?"

Rosalie shot Bella a dark look, presumably for keeping her out of the secret she'd just figured out. Bella just shrugged again with a smile. She'd never admit it, but she was pretty damned proud of herself for pulling a surprise on Alice.

"Alice!" David called this time.

"Coming!" Alice shouted. "Well, come on," she said, beckoning them to go with her. "Your curiosity is burning a hole in the back of my head."

Bella bit her lip to keep from laughing as she followed the coiffed and made up Rosalie (carefully) down the stairs, all still dressed in their casual clothes. Bella waved at Charlotte from behind the other two as Alice stood and gaped for a moment, her (girlfriend?) friend chatting easily with the two sets of parental figures in the room.

"Hey, _querida_," Charlotte said with a bright smile. "Hope I'm not crashing your party, but a little birdie dropped a note in my inbox that maybe you'd like a date for tonight." She was dressed in jeans and a smock, but Emma held onto a garment bag.

Bella quickly schooled her face as Alice whirled around, trying to figure out who it had been, but she gave up and turned back to Charlotte, a smile lighting her face as she moved past her parents, Carlisle, and Esme.

"Mom, Dad, this is Charlotte Alvarez. Charlotte these are my parents, Emma and David, and my aunt and uncle Esme and Carlisle," Alice said brightly, taking Charlotte's hand.

"It's very nice to meet you, Charlotte. Can I get you anything?" Esme offered with a soft smile.

"Oh, no, thanks. It looks like I need to get caught up," Charlotte responded with a nod toward Bella and Rosalie.

"Well, the girls have wine and snacks upstairs," Emma said, also smiling. "The boys will be here in an hour," she reminded them.

"Thanks, mom," Alice said, and Bella grinned as she watched her best friend tug Charlotte gently toward the stairs.

Esme tugged Bella into a quick hug before she could follow. "Good job, sweetheart."

"Thanks, Esme," Bella said softly, hugging her back before trailing after the others, taking Charlotte's garment bag from Emma.

Rose was pouring Charlotte a glass of wine when Bella slipped into the room. She hung Charlotte's dress (she assumed) with theirs in the otherwise empty closet and perched on the bed to watch as the other three finished (or started, in Charlotte's case) getting ready.

"You told me you were busy this weekend," Alice chided as she ran a brush through Charlotte's hair before pulling it into a thick pony tail high on her head.

"You didn't tell me why you wanted to know," Charlotte snarked back with a smile. "Besides, isn't this a good surprise?"

"Hm. Yes," Alice admitted grudgingly, kissing the crown of her head before twisting Charlotte's dark hair into a bun and securing it with pins before digging through her box of accessories. "How's that?" she asked. "We don't have a lot of time, and I have a feeling your hair needs a lot of time to set in curls or anything."

"It's perfect. Bella, it's not going to put a crimp in the dinner plans with me showing up, will it?" Charlotte asked, catching Bella's eyes in the mirror.

"Nope," Bella responded. "I made the reservations."

"You did this?" Alice asked, looking back over her shoulder at Bella. "Do I want to know how you got this by me?"

Bella shrugged. "Did most of it from the office," she admitted.

"And Jasper didn't notice?" Rosalie asked. "That's not like him."

"We have different prep periods," Bella responded. "So it wasn't that hard, really."

"Alright, leave the _chica_ alone and hand me my bag. No offense, but I'm not using your makeup," Charlotte said, winking at Bella over her shoulder.

Bella laughed and Rose slipped Charlotte her purse while Alice moved to one side to do her hair. Her short style prevented her from doing much, but Bella watched as she gelled and spiked up the back, then smoothed the front down with a side part and fixed the fringe back against her temples with a pair of tiny barrettes. By the time her makeup was finished she looked sophisticated, rather than like the teenager she could still pass as if she wanted to.

They waited until the last possible minute to slip into their dresses. Charlotte's was a figure hugging black tube dress with subtle diagonal ruffles ("eyelash, Bella" Alice had said with a sigh), that ran down the length.

Bella had just finished buckling her shoes into place when the sound of the doorbell reverberated through the house again. Apparently someone had decided to take the idea of picking up their dates a bit seriously.

"Girls!" Carlisle called up.

"Just a minute!" Alice shouted back, and laughter carried up the stairs. "Wraps?"

They all held up their wraps; it was too chilly in Forks, even in May, to go without something covering their upper bodies while outside. "Purses?" she asked next.

Bella displayed her small black clutch that was her all purpose fancy dress occasion bag.

"Uhm, no?" Charlotte asked, holding up the large canvas tote that passed as her purse.

"That's an easy fix, sweets," Alice promised. She cracked the door open. "Esme?" she called.

"Yes dear?" Esme asked from the hall.

"Do you have a spare purse Char can borrow? Hers isn't quite attire appropriate," she explained.

"Of course. And the boys are here," Esme reminded them. "I'll meet you downstairs."

"Thank you!" Alice popped back inside and closed the door. "Okay. We ready?"

Charlotte pulled her necessary items from her larger bag and nodded.

"Ready," Bella, Rose, and Charlotte chirped together.

"Christ, I never should have let the three of you meet," Alice swore softly, and the three of them laughed in response.

As a group they made their way downstairs. Bella concentrated on not stepping on Rosalie's dress or tripping in her low heels, so she didn't look up until she reached the landing.

Edward, Emmett, and Jasper stood in a row, chatting with Carlisle and David. Emma stood off to one side with a camera, and Bella assumed Esme was searching out the purse Alice had asked to borrow. Edward looked completely at ease in his clothes, which Bella knew had been tailored for him. Jasper looked less comfortable, but she and Alice had done a great job of choosing for him, Bella thought. Even Emmett's huge figure looked suave in his tuxedo, all in classic black with a simple white shirt and long tie with a vest. She smiled as their heads turned toward them as they stepped away from the stairs. She laughed as she watched their faces go from smiles to confusion at the strange woman with Alice, then pleasant expressions as they stepped away from each other, Rosalie to Emmett, Bella to Jasper and Edward.

"Wow. You two clean up nicely," Bella said with a soft smile, smoothing her hand lightly down Jasper's chest before he took her hand.

"Same could be said for you, darlin'. That color looks fantastic on you," he said before he kissed her softly and handed her off to Edward.

Bella had a feeling there would be quite a bit of handing off throughout the night.

"You're beautiful," Edward breathed against her cheek as he hugged her before kissing her softly.

Bella smiled brightly and linked her arms with theirs, and they moved the few paces over to where Rose was hanging on Emmett's arm and Alice had twined her fingers with Charlotte's. Esme had returned to the room and handed Charlotte a black beaded clutch, which she accepted gratefully. Esme's camera came out as soon as she had a free hand, and Bella could hear the quiet beeping as the digital images were stored on the memory card as Esme took candids.

"So, more introductions?" Alice asked lightly. "Charlotte Alvarez, these are my cousins Emmett and Edward Cullen," she said, nodding, "And Jasper Whitlock, Bella and Edward's partner. Em is Rose's fiancé, in case you couldn't tell," she teased.

"It's nice to finally meet you all," Charlotte said. "I've heard a lot about you."

"Don't believe a word Alice has told you about me," Emmett teased.

Charlotte just winked at him in response.

After they chatted for a few minutes, Esme chivvied them all into photo poses in various arrangements. None of them protested too much, even though there'd be a professional photographer at the school to take pictures. Once Esme and Emma had snapped enough photos to satisfy themselves, they headed out to their separate cars to the restaurant.

Bella had nearly made reservations for them in Port Angeles, but they would have had to have dinner incredibly early in able to make it back to campus on time; instead, she'd gone ahead and gotten a table for the seven of them at a smaller, probably less student-friendly place, after repeatedly refusing Esme's offer to make them a meal.

They met up at the restaurant, and were seated near the windows at a couple of tables that had been pushed together to make room for all of them. They situated themselves around the table in pairs, Emmett and Jasper taking the end seats with Rose and Alice at Emmett's elbows and Bella and Edward at Jasper's, Charlotte between Alice and Bella.

The food was fantastic and the conversation lively as everyone got to know Charlotte a bit better. She joked around with Emmett, and Bella learned that Jasper actually knew quite a bit of Spanish as he picked up on something Charlotte had said in that language and replied in kind. Bella and Edward and watched, amused, as they had bantered back and forth, leaving the rest of them out of the conversation until Bella nudged Jasper gently under the table; he had the grace to apologize and look flustered while Charlotte just smirked.

When it came time to pay the bill, Bella and the other ladies slipped cash from their purses to cover it, while the guys argued over whose turn and/or responsibility it was to pay. Alice handed the leather wallet over to the waiter with wink, the guys looking slightly bewildered at what had just happened. They finished their coffees and dessert with more laughter, and Bella loved having the time with her family where they were just relaxed and happy.

They arrived at the school a half-hour before the dance was scheduled to begin. Rose, the faculty mentor for the student-run prom committee needed to be there early and of course they'd all volunteered to lend their services to finish up any last tasks. A few younger students had been recruited as well, and they were lingering, waiting for their assignments. Rosalie sent a couple off to run the coat check and a few to the refreshments, and assigned the rest to check tickets, assist the photographer, and other random tasks. There'd been a small break room set up for them to use throughout the night which Bella found thoughtful (especially since the chaperones would be able to use it to escape the main room as well).

The prom was being held in the Student Activities Building. The first floor was dedicated to the bookstore and quiet study areas, but the upper level was full of activity rooms. The rooms had been cleared out for the dance and the removable walls adjusted to create one large open space for dancing, with smaller lounge rooms. Everything had been decorated to match the Casino Royale theme, complete with game tables littered throughout. The students could buy tickets that allowed them to 'gamble' with chips, with all the money going toward a charity that the prom committee had chosen. A few faculty members had volunteered to be the dealers for the evening at black jack.

Bella and the other girls left their wraps and purses with the two students at the coat check; the rooms were cool, but Bella knew that would change as the students began to arrive.

The photographer had set up in an out of the way alcove, a backdrop on a screen giving something for the students to stand in front of, and they took advantage of the lack of students to go through several poses in various groupings, each of them selecting a different package of photos that they'd be able to split up and share. By the time they finished the first students were beginning to arrive.

The dance was open to the three upper classes, and the students showed up in a range of dress. The guys were mostly in suits or tuxes, but the girls had a wide variety of dresses on a scale of formality. Thankfully, Bella found that they mostly blended in without being overdressed.

Over the course of an hour or so the rooms began to fill with students and the rest of the chaperones.

The night passed quickly. Bella danced with Edward and Jasper, and even with Emmett on the slow songs, which began to take up more of the DJ's playlist as the evening drew on.

When she danced with Edward and Jasper she was careful to maintain a casual distance with them, to all of their disappointments. She desperately wanted to get closer, to be able to just relax against them, to let them hold her and move with the music without worrying about what others thought. However, she was super conscious of the students and other faculty surrounding them. While they didn't maintain the massive amounts of space between bodies that she remembered being enforced on her at awkward school dances in junior high, she, Jasper, and Edward all maintained as little full body contact as possible while dancing.

She noted that, although their relationship was generally accepted by everyone, that Edward and Jasper didn't dance together, though she supposed that was more because they were more content to stand back and watch unless Bella tugged them out onto the dance floor. There was a student same-sex couple bold enough to take the floor together for a slow dance, Bella observed with a smile, and no one spared them a second glance. Jasper and Edward took their chances to dance with Alice and Charlotte as well. They mingled with students and lingered over the light buffet of snack food and punch and generally just had a good time.

Their duties weren't over until the last of the students had wearily left the building. The lights came back up and Bella flinched at their brightness, stumbling tiredly into Edward, who steadied her with a quiet laugh.

"Is there anythin' we need to do tonight, Rose?" Jasper asked, his voice rough and tired sounding, probably from having to talk over the music.

"Nope. I'm meeting the committee back here tomorrow afternoon, _late_ tomorrow afternoon, to clean up," she answered. "Go on, get out of here," she chided. "We'll make sure the DJ makes it out and take care of things. Thanks so much, guys," She said to all the chaperones who were still hanging around. The entire faculty in residence had made it, and stayed for the whole dance.

At that dismissal, most everyone started streaming out, gathering their coats.

"Come on, love, let's go," Edward said, draping his jacket over her shoulders. She nodded and retrieved her wrap and purse from Tanya, who had taken over the coat check around midnight, Jasper and Edward trailing behind her.

Just ahead of them as they crossed the campus to the parking lot, Alice and Charlotte walked hand in hand. Bella smiled, happy to see her friend happy again. Bella had been right; Charlotte fit right in with their group, easily dancing with Emmett, Edward, and Jasper throughout the night. She'd traded banter with them all and seemed to have a really great time with them. Kate's time with the group had always seemed forced, though she got along well with everyone. Bella just hoped that Alice didn't get her heart broken again.

After kissing Alice and Charlotte both on the cheek, Bella slid into the passenger seat of Edward's Volvo, gathering her skirt around her so it didn't snag, and Jasper slipped into the backseat as usual. The ride to the hotel was mostly quiet, the radio playing classical music softly while they all seemed to need the few moments of quiet to recover from the noise and energy of the evening.

When they reached the hotel they were able to bypass the desk since Edward and Jasper had already checked in earlier that afternoon. Edward's jacket was still draped over her shoulders while Jasper's arm snaked around her waist as they rode the elevator up two floors. She let Jasper lead her from the elevator and they followed Edward down the hall, pausing to let him let them into the room.

One light over the bed was on, casting the room in a soft glow. Jasper slid the jacket from Bella's shoulders as Edward crossed the room, and soft slow jazz filled the space. There was a bottle of something chilling in an ice bucket on the table next to three glasses, but it was ignored as Edward came back and took her hand and Jasper tossed Edward's jacket onto the foot of the bed, quickly followed by his own, before he loosened his tie.

Bella let Edward tug her toward him, smiling as she pressed her body against his, resting her cheek against his chest. She heard a quiet 'thunk' and both his arms were around her as they moved with the music, before a solid warmth was against her back and a third hand was at her hips. She felt Jasper's lips on the back of her head, and though she was completely sandwiched between the two of them, she didn't feel constrained or trapped. They moved together with the music, or, swayed, mostly, shuffling their feet a bit, until Edward gave her a bit of a hug and moved away, and Jasper used the hand on her hip to urge her to turn toward him.

She smiled softly as she looked up into his face, his collar and vest unbuttoned, his tie loose around his neck, and she tiptoed up to kiss him. His broad hand settled at the base of her spine, the heat seeping through her thin dress. Bella heard a quiet 'pop' as Jasper returned her kiss. He let her back do her feet gently and she giggled as he coaxed her into a spin under his arm, leading her to the table and Edward.

"Did you have a good night?" Edward asked as he handed her a glass of what turned out to be champagne.

"I did," Bella answered, leaning up to kiss him softly in thanks before taking a sip from her glass. "Though it was kind of difficult not getting as close as I wanted to," she admitted.

"For us, too, darlin'," Jasper said quietly behind her, his left hand lightly on her hip, his right taking a glass from Edward. She felt his lips on her bare shoulder and shivered lightly at the sensation. "Cold?" Jasper asked, teasing.

"No," she said softly as his hand skimmed across her body to rest on her abdomen, his fingers brushing against the layers of fabric covering her sex, sending another wave of gooseflesh across her body as he stepped up closer behind her. Jasper just barely moved with the music, sending the fabric of her dress rustling against her skin.

Edward discarded his half-full glass of champagne and pulled loose his bowtie, letting it hang around his neck as he unbuttoned his collar as well. Bella felt Jasper's lips on her shoulder again, then at the base of her neck, and her other shoulder before his hand slid back to her hip, leaving a trail of heat in its wake, before he spun her gently around again. He kissed her tenderly, smiled, took her empty left hand and twirled her one more time, toward Edward, who laughed and took her hand from Jasper.

"Finish your drink," Edward advised her quietly, brushing his lips against her cheek. He slowly spun her, as Jasper had done, and she laughed softly. She drained half her champagne and handed him back the glass, which he set on the table.

Jasper was moving around behind her. She could hear the rustle of clothing, and what sounded like his shoes coming off as Edward tugged her close again, holding her hand against his chest, his other at the small of her back as they moved with the music still playing in the room. Bella once again rested her cheek against Edward's chest, listening to his breath and heartbeat in counter to the rhythm of the music, the soft vibration of his humming idly along with the sounds in the room reverberating against her cheek, making her smile.

She let her eyes drift closed as she danced with Edward, humming happily as he kissed the top of her head. Bella felt more than heard Edward's laugh and moved easily as he turned her around, wrapping his arms around her waist from behind, resting his chin on her shoulder as the music changed to something a bit more slow and sultry. Jasper looked completely at ease as he slowly worked the knot completely out of his tie and pulled it from around his neck in a smooth motion that took longer than Bella thought necessary. Jasper let it slip through his fingers and fall to the floor in a loose coil of blue. She glanced down and found him barefoot, though otherwise mostly fully dressed.

Edward's hand against her lower body tugged her backwards slightly and she leaned into him as he moved, probably unconsciously, with the new rhythm as they watched Jasper. Their blonde lover looked at once predatory in his movements and playful in his actions and expression as he finished unbuttoning his blue sateen vest, a teasing sparkle in his eyes as he let it slide to the floor to mix with the tie.

"I do believe he's toying with us, love," Edward said softly in her ear, nuzzling along her neck with his nose, his warm breath washing over her skin as their continued movements caused her dress to shift and slide against her as well.

"Hm. Okay," she said lightly. She really wasn't opposed to it. She felt Edward's laughter rumble against her back and she smiled as Jasper stalked slowly toward them, unbuttoning first the cuffs of his shirt, then working his way slowly down from the collar, moving his hips in rhythm to the music to untuck the shirt to finish.

The sides of the shirt just barely parted, revealing the tight white of Jasper's preferred undershirts barely concealing the lines of muscle in his abdomen. Jasper shrugged out of the shirt, the whisper of the fabric against his skin just audible over the music and the combined sounds of her breathing mixed with Edward's. Bella wanted to reach out and tug the undershirt over Jasper's head herself, but she relaxed slightly into Edward's embrace, feeling the stirrings of his arousal against her backside as Jasper continued to move with a sensual grace to remove his clothing. Edward's hand was moving in small circles against her lower body, his fingers mimicking Jasper's earlier motions and just gazing her through the thin layers of her dress and panties, leaving her increasingly wanting more.

Bella smiled as Edward's breathing hitched slightly behind her as Jasper's hands traced the lines of his hips as he worked his way toward the fasteners on the tuxedo pants. His right thumb slid into the waistband while his fingers teased at the hook-and-eye closure that kept the tab concealing the button and zipper tab closed. Jasper kept his movements agonizingly teasingly slow as he slipped the tab out of the catch and let it hang as his left hand skated along his waistband so he could use both hands to work the button out of the hole and ease his zipper down.

With his trousers just barely hanging open, Jasper slowly tugged the hem of his undershirt from the waistband, revealing pale skin and a dusting of hair that thinned as he lifted the shirt higher. With a grin, Jasper pulled the shirt over his head and let it drop to the floor behind him as he raked his fingers through his hair.

Bella's eyes made their way slowly from the slight gap in his trousers that revealed nothing but the tell tale outline that showed he was enjoying himself as much as Bella and Edward were. She felt her hair brushed to one side and Edward's lips were at her neck, just at the tender spot where her spine met her shoulders and she shivered again lightly. The hand that wasn't on her body began teasing at the zipper of her dress, Edward making small progress with it one handed. Bella lifted one of her arms over her head and back slightly, running her fingers through the hair at the back of Edward's head, while her other hand lightly clung to the arm he had around her waist, her fingers dancing up and down over his bare forearms, his shirt sleeves having been rolled to his elbows at some point in the night.

Still moving along with the music, Jasper shifted his hips just slightly along with a light push from his fingertips, easing his trousers down, revealing, centimeter by centimeter dark fabric beneath.

Bella burst out laughing when Jasper's tuxedo pants reached his thighs before he let them go and stepped out of them. She heart Edward's snort of laughter behind her, and Jasper was grinning.

Beneath his tuxedo pants, Jasper had worn a pair of black boxer briefs with a tuxedo shirt, jacket, and tie silk-screened onto the fabric.

The building tension in the room lifted with their laughter, though their arousal did not. Jasper, in his goofy looking shorts, stalked toward Bella and Edward. He pulled Edward in for a kiss first, squishing Bella slightly between them and she raked her fingernails lightly up and down his chest and belly, making him squirm slightly. When Jasper broke the kiss with Edward, his hands went to Bella's hips, freeing Edward's hands to both work at the zipper of her dress. The kiss she shared with Jasper was deep but tender, and she felt Edward's lips on her neck as he worked the zipper down.

Bella felt her dress pool at her waist, the slide of the fabric against her body sending another chill through her in her already excited state. Jasper's hands moved momentarily, letting the mass of fabric slide down her skin to pool at her feet, revealing the strapless blue leopard print bra and cheeky panties that matched the color of her dress, her bare legs that she'd carefully shaved the night before, and the strappy silver sandals with a low heel that she and Alice had agreed on.

Edward made a disappointed sound behind her. Bella turned her head to look at him. "I was hoping for stockings," he admitted, his voice low. "I wanted to get to roll them down your legs, my fingers sliding against your skin," he breathed.

"Next time," Bella promised, the image of his words in her mind.

He kissed her hungrily, a happy sounding growl-like noise rumbling up from his throat. When they broke the kiss, Jasper took Bella's hand and helped her step out of her dress, kissing her softly before they rounded on Edward. Bella took Edward's hands and tugged him toward the bed, Jasper following with a laugh after grabbing the three half-full flutes of champagne to set on the bureau and kissing them each swiftly before crossing the room confidently.

Bella's hands went to work, batting away Edward's when he got in the way, pulling loose his tie and vest, dropping them on the floor next to the bed. He kissed whatever skin he could reach while she worked on the buttons on his shirt, Jasper returning with the small kit her men travelled with. He tossed it onto the bed and climbed up behind Edward, helping Bella slide Edward's shirt off before flinging it across the room. Jasper kissed Bella over Edward's shoulder then his hands tugged at Edward's t-shirt while Bella focused on getting his trousers unfastened and down around his knees. Edward lifted up his hips and rather than make him do it twice, Bella pulled down his plain black boxers at the same time, leaving him to kick off his shoes, then his trousers and underwear.

Bella knelt between his legs and tugged off his socks with a wink before rising, skimming her hands up his bare legs feeling the change in texture along the scars from his surgeries as she went. Edward claimed her in a kiss when she was upright and she tumbled forward onto his chest with a laugh when Jasper grabbed her waist from behind Edward and pulled them backwards onto the bed and his own body.

Edward took advantage of their positions and removed her bra, dropping it to the floor, then using his fingers to tease her panties down over her hips so she could kick them away.

With a laugh, Jasper wriggled out from underneath them. He leaned over Edward's body and kissed Bella before brushing his lips over her cheek and whispering in her ear.

"I have an idea," he said, before reaching for one of the glasses of champagne. He winked at her before he sat back up.

Edward was reclined between them and he watched, playfully wary.

"Oops." Jasper didn't look at all contrite as bubbling wine spilled all over Edward's chest and began streaming down and over his body. He smirked evilly before he bent and ran his tongue over Edward's body, lapping up the trails of champagne he'd caused to run.

Bella bit her lip briefly before following suit with a grin. Beneath them, Edward squirmed as they lapped up the spilled beverage. Edward's reactions fueled Bella's imagination and she reached behind her for another class and she met Jasper's gaze across Edward's body. Jasper gave her an encouraging nod.

She took a sip of champagne, just enough to dance across her mouth before she lifted her tongue and let the liquid fill the cavity there. With a smirk, she shifted and took Edward's cock into her mouth, letting the champagne flow through her mouth and over his sensitive skin. He whimpered, his eyes fluttering closed and Bella swallowed the drink as she wrapped her tongue around his length, pulling away slowly. She did that twice more, while Jasper poured more champagne into the hollow of Edward's throat and lapped it up, before sharing a champagne filled kiss with Edward, and then Bella.

"Enough," Edward growled playfully, sitting up and reaching for the last glass of champagne on the bureau. "Turnabout's fair play," he warned before toppling Bella backwards.

She giggled, until he poured a trail of liquid down her body, starting at her belly button. She gasped as the cool fizz traveled down her overheated skin. Edward followed the trail with his tongue. "Oops. Missed a spot," he teased, then ran his tongue over her carefully trimmed mound before pouring more champagne over her sex onto his tongue. She giggled and shifted and squirmed against the multiple sensations. Jasper got into the act, pouring the last of the beverage over her chest, using it as an excuse to lavish her breasts with attention, ratcheting Bella's arousal even higher when combined with Edward's tongue between her legs.

Her first orgasm crashed over her, followed by a second, less intense one, that left her feeling bonelessly relaxed and sated. When she blinked her eyes open after a moment of letting her breathing return to normal, Edward and Jasper were pressed together in a kiss, both of them still obviously hard. Bella sat up and pressed herself against their sides, inserting herself into the kiss. It was weird and awkward but different.

"Would you?" Bella asked, raking her hands down their bodies. "Both of you?"

Jasper's eyes were wide, despite the heavy lidded expression of arousal. "You want?"

Bella shook her head. "No. Well…not tonight. But…I just want to feel you both," she said.

"Come here," Edward said, tugging her toward him, while Jasper reached around for their bag. She heard it unzip as Edward kissed her deeply, skimming his hands up and down her sides.

Jasper slipped two condoms into her hand and slid behind her, lips on her neck and shoulders as she faced Edward. She tore the wrapper off the first condom and slowly, teasingly, rolled it onto Edward's cock, giving him a squeeze before she ran her fingernails lightly over his balls, making him moan quietly. She lifted up on her knees slightly and turned, sitting back on her haunches before she repeated the action on Jasper.

Bella rose up once more, then slowly settled herself onto Jasper's length. Behind her, she heard Edward fumble for something, then felt him slide up against her. Jasper's hands were at her hips for leverage, and Edward pressed up against her from behind, sliding along her ass, but not penetrating. They set up an easy rhythm, somehow synching up with the music still playing in the room. It was slow and steady and sweet, and Jasper used his fingers to help her come a third time before he did, and Edward followed moments later.

Jasper cradled Bella to his chest as he reclined, Edward slipping to the side and pressing his chest against Bella's back after they'd removed the condoms and tied them off, tossing them aside. They cuddled up, despite the sticky mess on their bodies from tongues and champagne and the damp spots the liquor had made in the linens.

"I think there's one more thing we need to consider looking for when we look at houses," Edward said thoughtfully, playing with Bella's hair after they'd been quietly lying together for a few minutes.

"What's that?" she asked, curious.

"A stripper pole," Edward deadpanned.

Bella burst out laughing and she heard the quick 'smack' of flesh against flesh before Edward's laughter rumbled against her back, and in her mind's eye she could see Jasper rolling his eyes in exasperation. "I don't think we need a stripper pole, baby," Bella responded, still laughing.

"I dunno, I think Jasper'd be very good at it," Edward said, a thoughtful note in his voice.

"Jasper doesn't want to be good at it," Jasper snarked, and Edward yelped. Bella figured Jasper'd pinched him.

"I think that's something that will need to wait," Bella said, playing the mediator.

"Fine," Edward said with a sigh. "Spoilsports," he muttered.

Bella rolled her eyes, then turned over and kissed him lightly. "Speaking of," she said. "Carmen emailed me about ten listings we need to look at," she said. "We need to pick the ones we're interested in so she can arrange walk-throughs for us."

"We can look at them tomorrow?" Jasper suggested. "Or, later today, rather."

"Mm," Edward hummed agreement.

Bella snuggled down between them. "Kay."

"Sleepy?" Edward asked, and Bella felt lips against her shoulder.

"Yeah," she mumbled. "'s late."

"Mm," Edward agreed, and she felt Jasper's arms around her.

"We'll talk in the mornin' darlin'," Jasper assured her, his own voice tired and low.

"Sounds good," she muttered, her eyes already closed. Edward's quiet laughter rumbled through her again, and she slipped into sleep comforted by their presence and surrounded by their love.

* * *

end note: querida means beloved or dear one, here I'm using it as sweetheart, which is okay, according to one translation website and my own far distant Spanish classes in high school and college. Assorted pictures on the blog


	60. Chapter 59: End of the Year

**Thanks to Naelany for being an awesome beta partner. **

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The week after prom seemed to get just a bit crazier than the week leading up to it, for Jasper anyway. He and his lovers had slept late on Sunday morning, having had a much later night than usual, and had eaten at the diner before returning to campus.

Monday had set the theme for the week as the students were excited and amped up about the end of the year and their final two weeks of classes, and it had been all Jasper could do to actually get his students to sit through the test he'd gotten them to agree to in order to watch the movie the previous week. By the end of the day, Jasper was more exhausted than he'd been in a straight day of teaching since the beginning of the academic year in Forks. Thankfully, his students didn't need much from him during office hours, and he and Bella were able to join the others for dinner at their regular time.

With the final swim meet coming up that weekend, Jasper's swim team was working harder than he asked them to during practices on Tuesday and Thursday, and he was really impressed with their dedication to the event and representing their school.

The rest of the week went much the same way, with rambunctious students and an increasingly frustrated Jasper. He worked to keep himself calm, reminding himself of how he'd been as a kid, but then also reminded his students that they had chosen to attend the academy and that their parents might be disappointed by their end of the year performance. That helped – a very little bit.

Friday night, after watching a movie with Bella, Edward, and Alice in the girls' suite, Jasper headed back to his, alone, wanting to try to sleep, since he had to be at the pool insanely early for the day-and-a-half meet that began on Saturday.

Jasper woke to his alarm Saturday morning even earlier than he normally did during the week. He skipped a shower, since he knew he'd be spending the day at the pool, and flicked the kettle on for coffee while he rifled through his cupboards for anything to take with him for breakfast and snacks. Since they'd been creeping closer to the end of the term he hadn't been shopping in awhile and all he came up with were a couple of granola bars, a box of crackers and a half-empty jar of peanut butter. With a shrug, he started assembling peanut butter cracker sandwiches and dumped them in a bag while the coffee ran through the filter into a travel mug.

Though he had absolutely no intention of getting in the water, Jasper tugged on his swim shorts under a pair of sweats and zipped up a Forks Academy Athletics hoodie over a similarly silk-screened t-shirt. He slipped into a pair of flip flops, gathered his bag where he shoved his iPod, a towel, a book, a bottle of water and his snacks, and he headed off to the pool.

There were already several busses in the parking lot as Jasper made his way to the gym. The meet was bigger than the one a few months previous, though it wasn't as competitive as some of the other regional meets that the Academy didn't take part in. It was an invitational event, and Jasper was relieved that the Phys Ed. Department had been in charge of organizing the event itself and all he was responsible for was coaching the swimmers. He had a feeling that might change in the future, with his new status as a full time instructor.

When Jasper entered the gym there were signs directing people where to go to get to the locker rooms and to the pool deck. Jasper made his way around to the pool and found the section for him and the swimmers as the hosts.

It didn't take long for the space to begin to fill up. There was clearly not enough room for everyone participating in the meet to be around the pool at all times, and he had been told that there would be tents set up just outside for people to gather, in case it started raining. Jasper regretted that they didn't have an outdoor pool with adequate grassy seating areas, but he understood it was extremely impractical for Forks.

Saturday turned out to be an incredibly long day. He caught sight of his family in the stands throughout the day, including Esme, Carlisle, Emma and David. Bella picked her way through the crowd to bring him a sandwich at one point, which he gratefully accepted with a hug and wolfed it down outside in between heats that his kids were swimming.

By the time they were done for the day, Jasper was starving and tired. He was waved off helping with anything by the students from the Physical Education department, who were running the event as part of a class, and made his way to his car, and then the Cullen home, not bothering to change first.

Though he was late for dinner, he was welcomed with open arms, and everyone sat around the table and continued talking as he ate the plate that Esme had made and kept warm for him. After dinner and dessert, he cuddled up with Edward and Bella for awhile and watched a movie before making his excuses to go back to campus, once again needing to be up early the next morning. Before he left, Esme pressed a container into his hands.

"Breakfast," she said with a wink. "Just heat it up for a few minutes."

Jasper thanked her with a kiss on the cheek, and Edward and Bella walked him to his car.

"You don't have to go," Bella said quietly, wrapping herself around him, her cheek pressed to his chest.

"I know," Jasper assured her. "But I've got another early morning, and I'm just going to crash," he said, hugging her as Edward hugged them from the side. "Stay," he said gently before either of them could offer to go back to campus with him. "Have a good night with the family and relax," he said, tugging on a length of Bella's hair as he teased.

"You're sure?" Edward asked one more time as Bella released Jasper and attached herself to Edward's side.

"I'm sure," Jasper promised. "Seriously, I'm going to go back, maybe put on a movie, and hopefully sleep." He kissed them both gently and climbed back into the car.

Jasper texted them when he got back to campus, and just as he planned, after a hot shower, he put a movie on and fell asleep quickly.

Jasper was physically exhausted when the meet ended Sunday afternoon, and it had run later than planned. His students had done well, and it wasn't much of an effort to dredge up congratulatory smiles for them as they received their awards for the weekend. As the spectators vacated the pool and the students trooped off to the locker room, Jasper slowly gathered his things, throwing everything into his bag and making sure everything was cleaned up from the pool deck before he made his way back to his dorm.

He had two hours until he needed to be at dinner, and he stared at his bed for a moment, wanting to fall into it, but knowing if he did, he'd miss dinner. With a sigh, he tossed his bag on the floor near his table and headed for the shower. He lingered under the hot water, letting it beat down on his muscles and relax the tension from his back and shoulders.

Jasper sat on the edge of his bed, a towel wrapped around his waist after he'd toweled his hair dry. He let his eyes slip closed.

"Jasper? Jasper, baby, wake up."

"Hm?" Jasper blinked his eyes open to see Edward standing over him, a soft smile on his face.

"C'mon, it's time for dinner," Edward said, leaning over to kiss him softly. "Get dressed. I'll get your things; we're going to mom and dad's after dinner, remember?"

"Yeah," Jasper said slowly, sitting up with a quiet groan. "What time is it?"

"Six-fifteen," Edward answered. "Emmett gave me his key when we didn't see you at dinner," he said sort of apologetically.

"Christ," Jasper swore, Edward moving to one side as he shifted to get up. He crossed to his bureau and closet and dressed quickly in jeans, a t-shirt, and a sweater, and stamped his sockless feet into his loafers. Behind him, Edward grabbed a clean pair of underwear, socks, and pulled a couple things from his closet and tossed them into the empty duffel bag Jasper usually carried.

"Ready?" Edward asked.

Jasper nodded, and Edward took his hand, leading him out and to the dining hall.

The building was a mass of noise, which meant the dean hadn't started speaking yet. Jasper squeezed Edward's hand and let him return to the table and his meal, while Jasper went quickly through the serving stations to load up his tray; he was starving.

Bella smiled at him, and Jasper returned it sheepishly as he slid into his chair between her and Alice.

"Nice of you to join us, Jasper," Esme teased.

"Yes, ma'am," Jasper answered as the others laughed. "Sorry. Guess I dozed off," he apologized.

He felt Bella's hand on his arm. "You had a long weekend," she said with a smile before turning back to his food.

Emmett looked like he was about to say something before the PA system squawked to life.

"Ladies and gentlemen, good evening," the dean's voice sounded throughout the building."I'd like to welcome you all to the last official gathering of the year, besides the event on Friday, which I have been told will be fun for all.

"We've had an interesting year here at Forks Academy," he continued. "We have faced many challenges, some I know that we'd planned for, but had hoped would never actually happen. But we've also had many great successes, including sending students off to several Ivy League schools, many on some kind of achievement scholarship."

Dr. Harper paused to allow for applause. "I'll keep my remarks short this evening, as I'm sure some of you have plans for tomorrow's holiday. First off, let me say that I'm immensely proud of each and every one of you. Despite the many challenges that have occurred, both on personal levels and campus-wide, you have all continued to do the best possible job that you could as students and members of this community.

"Secondly, I'd like to announce that the faculty speakers for graduation have been nominated and voted on by the graduating class. Dr. Swan and Dr. Whitlock have been, pretty much unanimously, voted to be the commencement speakers this year, along with the valedictorian, Pamela Sanders."

Jasper was pretty stunned with that revelation, though Bella didn't look too surprised as more applause carried through the building.

"I'd also like to formally announce that Dr. Whitlock will be joining the faculty full time next term. We will also be welcoming two new instructors next fall, to replace Dr. Thomas from biology and Dr. Sims from Math. Mr. Cullen will be officially taking over the position of Director of Bands, as well, and we'll be welcoming some new staff, as usual," the dean said.

"I'll have some more specific remarks for the graduating class at commencement next week," he continued. "So I'll limit myself to the rest of you for tonight," he said to general laughter. "I look forward to having you all back next fall term, as we welcome a new class of first year students. I know that we'll continue to make new goals for ourselves as students and as a school, and that you will continue to give Forks Academy the reputation it has earned.

"As a community we'll face some changes next year. We seem to have a mass exodus of instructors who would like to move off campus. As many of you know, Dr Hale and Dr Cullen are getting married in a few weeks."

The dean had to pause for cheers and cat calls throughout the assembled body of students and faculty. Jasper watched Emmett hug Rosalie with one arm as they both had bright smiles at the reactions of those assembled.

"And we wish them the best as they get ready to start that new phase of their life together. We will adjust to the losses of these faculty in the dorms and hopefully there won't be any major changes to the way things are currently run."

Jasper couldn't help the small stab of guilt at the dean's words as he, Bella, and Edward prepared to jump ship with Emmett and Rose. Bella squeezed his hand.

"As I said, I wanted to keep things short tonight. I thank you all for a wonderful year. Please try to stay focused for our last three days of classes next week, and I wish you all the best of luck on your final exams. I'll see most of you again next Friday. Have a good night."

With that the PA clicked off and conversation resumed. As students and other faculty began to leave they stopped at the Cullen table and offered congratulations to both Emmett and Rose for the wedding, and Jasper for the position. The students actually seemed excited that he'd be staying, and some expressed a genuine interest in hearing him speak at the commencement ceremonies two weeks away.

Jasper was very much ready to leave when they all finished dinner. He, Edward, and Bella were going to Esme and Carlisle's for the night; Emmett, Rose, and Alice would meet them there the next morning. Jasper shouldered his bag and let Bella take his hand as they made their way to the Volvo, and he didn't protest as she slipped around to the backseat after kissing him lightly on the cheek.

When they arrived at the house, they quietly trooped up the stairs to Edward's room, and Jasper quickly stripped down and crawled back into bed, taking the far side against the wall, smiling as he quietly drifted off to sleep again, Bella's giggles and Edward's soft voice providing the background noise. He felt the bed dip and move as he floated on the edge of sleep, lazily dragging a hand along whatever skin he could as they enjoyed a quiet few moments of intimacy.

When he woke Monday morning in Edward's bed, Jasper was alone. He could smell coffee and hear voices downstairs, though, so he pulled himself from the bed, quickly washed his face and tugged on the pair of jeans he'd worn the night before, with a hoodie from the bureau, and socks from his bag.

He found Edward seated at the breakfast bar, watching Esme, Emma, and Bella move around the kitchen. Jasper accepted both the kiss from Edward and the coffee from Esme, giving her a kiss on the cheek in return. "Where's everyone else?"

"Dad and David ran out to pick up a few things, and the others aren't here yet," Edward answered.

Jasper nodded. "Is there anything I can help with?"

Bella handed him a bag of green beans with just a hint of that pleading pout she did so well. Beside him, Edward smirked. "See, that's why I didn't ask."

Bella swatted at Edward with a towel and Jasper laughed, going to work at picking the ends of the beans while Emma and Esme finished what looked like breakfast. He finished just as Carlisle and David returned with a couple of grocery bags and Esme chivvied them all into the dining room for a fairly "simple" meal of eggs, pancakes, and bacon.

Just as Edward and Jasper finished loading the dishwasher, Emmett and Rosalie arrived, and Alice a few minutes behind them.

The morning had dawned clear, and the family spent a still chilly, but sunny day on the back patio, playing games and hanging out. Jasper spent a fair amount of the day curled up in the lounge chair with Bella and/or Edward. Esme had asked Emmett, Carlisle, and David to pull the covers off the heated pool for the 'season,' though no one was fully prepared to swim just yet. They rolled up their pants and sat along edge, dipping their feet in.

Charlotte had been unable to make it, coming up on finals herself and not being able to spare the time, but Alice was never far from her phone throughout the day so Jasper suspected they were keeping in touch through text messages and what not. Charlotte seemed good for Alice, and there was definitely a connection there; Jasper just hoped that Alice would handle the long-distance relationship for a couple years until Charlotte finished up her schooling and decided on her next phase of life.

Carlisle, David, and Jasper were in charge of the barbeques starting mid-afternoon, and they cooked up a mass of burgers and chicken, to go along with the salads that Esme, Emma, Rose, and Bella had prepared or bought. Bella'd also been in charge of dessert and decided that she'd redo the banana pudding she'd made in the early days of Jasper's relationship with the Cullen family.

Jasper knew that summer, at least summer as he knew it with high temperatures and lots of sunshine, never truly came to Forks, but as a kick off to the season, and the end of the year, the day was just what they needed to recharge.

As dusk fell, the girls launched an armada of floating candles across the pool, and more sweaters and socks were donned. Emmett lit a fire in the pit and they continued to sit around and chat as a family. Bella dozed off mid-conversation, her knees pulled to her chest and wrapped in a blanket, tucked between Jasper and Edward in the large round lawn chair, her head against Jasper's shoulder. They softened their voices, but kept up the casual conversation until Esme and Carlisle, quickly followed by Emma and David excused themselves for the night.

Emmett began to let the fire die, and the lights in the pool slowly flickered and went out, and Alice brought out a round of hot chocolate laced with a bit of something (schnapps, Alice had said) to replace the sodas and iced tea they'd been drinking throughout the day. Bella woke for that (and endured teasing for it), and once the beverages were gone, and the fire was out, they all headed to their separate rooms for the night.

Jasper and his lovers kissed and teased and fondled as they stripped for bed, Jasper and Edward down to boxers, Bella to a thin tank and a pair of shorts. Once they made it through the bathroom in a rotation that included more hands and teasing, they piled into bed together. They didn't make love, but they curled closely around each other, limbs tangled as they all sought to have as much contact with each other as they could.

xxx

Since Monday was a holiday, the last week of classes was shortened to three days. Several of Jasper's classes were finishing up the year with presentations, which made the students slightly more focused than the week previous. The presentations made up a good portion of their grades, and with the experience, Jasper knew he'd be revising his calendar for the next spring semester so that the presentations happened before the last week of school, so he could attempt to have a few productive days of review before final exams.

Thursday's classes were interesting. It was the last day of classes of the academic year, and Jasper handed out the final review sheets for the exams and basically had low-key classes for the day. Cameras came out and pictures were taken in every one of his morning classes. In his last class before lunch, they ran a bit over time, and he jogged up to his office to collect Bella's lunch order.

The phone on Jasper's desk rang just as he got into the room. "Hello?" he answered, slightly breathless.

"Jasper, it's Esme."

"Is there something wrong?" He said, feeling himself begin to worry. Had something happened to Edward or Bella? Why hadn't she called his mobile?

"Oh, no, dear, at least not with me. The dean wishes to see you. Do you have a few minutes?"

Jasper glanced at his computer and got the time. "Now?" Lunch was normally a completely free period for everyone on campus, and he expected the dining hall to be a zoo.

"Yes. Can I let him know you're on your way?"

"Of course, Esme. I'll be right there." After she said her thanks, Jasper hung up. He scribbled a quick note for Bella, apologizing for not getting her lunch, and dashed back out the door and across campus. Hopefully whatever the dean wanted wouldn't take long, so he could still grab something to eat before his afternoon started.

"Go on in, Jasper, he's expecting you," Esme said, pulling on her jacket, her purse already on her desk.

Jasper nodded and tapped on the door to the dean's office, waiting for the other man to call out before he entered.

"Ah, Jasper, thank you for coming to see me on such short notice," Dr. Harper greeted him. "Please, have a seat. Coffee?"

Jasper took the seat the dean offered, but declined the coffee. His worry increased as Dr. Harper took the seat next to him, looking entirely too serious for Jasper's comfort.

"It has been brought to my attention," Dr. Harper began quietly. "That a few students have made some interesting phone calls home recently."

Jasper felt his heart drop into his stomach. He held his tongue as the dean continued.

"While the parents assure me that their students have nothing but good things to say, they were concerned about a series of comments that their students had made, regarding you, Edward Cullen, and Bella Swan. Two of these students are graduating next week, and so their parents weren't worried, but they felt that it needed to be brought to my attention that three of the schools' instructors appear to have engaged in a rather alternative lifestyle as of late. The third student has one more year with us, and her parents wanted to make me aware that there were rumors amongst the students."

For once, Jasper wished he was more attuned to the student run rumor mill. "What rumors?" He asked quietly, knowing what the Dean's response would be.

"That you and Edward have also engaged Bella Swan in your romantic relationship."

Jasper took a deep breath and let it out slowly.

"Before you respond, Jasper?" Dr. Harper asked. Jasper nodded. "Your private life is none of my, or the board's, business," he said. "And let me assure you that this in no way affects your appointment here for the fall and future semesters. The parents have not mentioned anything to the board as of yet."

Jasper heard the clearly implied threat in those last few words. He continued to wait as the dean finished. "It is my understanding that the three of you intend to move off campus at the end of the semester, and are not intending to return to serve as faculty in residence, correct?"

"Yes, sir," Jasper answered simply.

The dean nodded thoughtfully. "Dr. Whitlock, you have been a great benefit to this campus in the last year. You and Dr. Swan are two of our most highly rated instructors amongst the students, and it's no wonder that they've nearly unanimously voted for the two of you to speak at the graduation ceremony next week. I would hate to lose one or all of you, as Mr. Cullen has also seemed to come into his own and flourish in his new role here." The dean's sudden formality was not lost on Jasper. "I don't care what you do in your own home, on your own time. However," he said, the seriousness still fixed on his features. "I recommend that, in the future, either you and Dr. Swan refrain from accompanying Mr. Cullen on school related events, or stick more closely to the rules that are put in place for the students to follow and act as good role models. At the very least, become practiced at being extremely discrete. It did not go unnoticed that the three of you appeared to share a room while you were in Los Angeles," he finished, leveling his stare on Jasper.

"Yes, sir," Jasper answered again with a short nod.

"As long as you are faculty in residence, which you are for the next week and a half, I expect the three of you to conduct yourselves appropriately, especially with the influx of family that will begin arriving to claim their students or attend graduation. Whenever you're attending to business as regards the school, you will maintain that level of appropriateness in the future. Is this clear?"

Jasper nodded again, a bit of relief flooding him. They weren't in trouble. They'd only been slightly censured and had only another two weeks to deal with it. "Yes, sir."

"I trust you can relay this information to Mr. Cullen and Dr. Swan?"

"Yes, sir," Jasper repeated. His thoughts were spinning. The dean knew about them. Though the board didn't, that only meant that their most immediate supervisor had something to hold over their heads if they stepped out of line.

"Okay. Is there anything else I can do for you, Jasper?" The dean asked, as though Jasper had requested the meeting.

"No, sir. I have classes this afternoon, and I need to get to lunch" Jasper answered stiffly.

"Alright then. Thank you."

Jasper nodded again and rose, walking out of the room at attention, his back ramrod straight, hardly daring to breathe lest the dean call him back and change his mind and fire Jasper on the spot. Esme's desk was vacant; she'd begun working half-days since the surgery.

Edward and Bella were waiting outside the administration building when Jasper exited. Bella had a paper bag cradled in her arms, and Edward had a drink tray in his free hand. He shook his head wordlessly at their questioning glances and led them back to the office he shared with Bella. There was only about fifteen minutes left of the lunch period when they arrived and Jasper locked the door behind them. He all but fell into his desk chair and buried is face in his hands, his fingers lightly tugging on his hair. After a moment he felt strong hands at his shoulders and a quiet but worried presence at his calves, a comfortable weight pressed against him.

"Mom called and warned me that the dean had asked to speak with you," Edward said quietly from behind him. "What happened?"

Jasper realized Bella must've squeezed herself between Jasper and his desk to sit at his feet. He sighed heavily and scrubbed his fingers through his hair again.

"We got outed," Jasper said quietly after a moment. "Apparently a few students noticed we roomed together in LA and who knows what else," he said with a sigh. "Students told their parents, who let the dean know of the potential problem." He sighed again.

"Are we in trouble?" Bella asked quietly.

Jasper leaned forward and kissed the top of her head. "No. We've been mildly censured and warned to be more discreet when with students or representing the school The dean doesn't want to interfere in our personal lives or inform the board unless there's been a complaint which there technically hasn't been. Yet."

"I don't like the sound of that 'yet,'" Bella said quietly.

"Me either," Edward agreed. "So…definitely want the house by August then."

Jasper nodded. "I don't know that I could deal with the scrutiny of being in residence next year, since you know with this the dean won't approve of us sharing a suite," he said to Edward.

"I'll call Carmen after classes," Bella said. "Do you want to eat? There's still a few minutes?"

Jasper shook his head. "I'm not hungry." He felt her weight on his knees as she pushed herself up.

"Okay. I'll leave it for later. Edward brought you a soda," she said quietly. She kissed him softly. "We're going to be okay, sweetheart," she assured him, before slipping back over to her desk where she'd left the lunch bag. She must've found Jasper's note, as well, as she looked back over and smiled sadly before sorting out the contents and bringing the bag back to Edward.

"She's right you know," Edward said, leaning down and kissing Jasper softly on the forehead. "We're going to be just fine."

Jasper nodded. He knew that. He just didn't like the way things were sitting in his body. He took a deep breath and let it out slowly.

"Try to relax, okay?" Edward asked. "It's the last day of classes; you're supposed to have a little bit of fun." Jasper felt a slight pressure on his shoulders and he was slowly turning in his chair. Edward kissed him softly on the mouth. "I love you," Edward said quietly.

"Love you, too," Jasper answered just as softly.

Edward smiled, kissed Bella, took the lunch bag and his soda and headed out.

Bella sat on Jasper's lap for a moment after Edward had gone, and Jasper held onto her until she wriggled, needing to get up. He kissed her lightly and let her go, and she returned to her desk to wolf down her lunch and quickly check her email.

Jasper spent the last few minutes before classes started again staring off into space.

The remainder of the day passed in a blur – Jasper finally ate the wrap Bella had brought him toward the end of his prep period, which got him through the last two classes. Bella already had a fresh cup of coffee waiting on his desk when he got back to the office. With the last swim meet over, he didn't have practice, but was holding office hours instead, for a few last minute students, despite it being the last day of classes. Jasper's buzz for the day had been effective squashed by his meeting with the dean and he wanted nothing more than go to back to his room and lock everyone out. Well – nearly everyone.

The three students who took advantage of his last office hour of the semester were a great distraction, especially because Bella had a few of her own last minute drop-ins. When the last of both of their students had gone, they quietly packed up and Bella took Jasper's hand as they walked across campus to the cafeteria, neither of them willing to change something they'd been doing since long before they'd begun dating. They were both quiet, but Jasper had a feeling Bella was only quiet because he was – he could feel himself closing off – the censure felt all too familiar to someone who'd had to hide everything he was to fulfill his dreams, had had that stolen from him anyway.

Bella paused outside the cafeteria, tugging Jasper to a stop. "Do you want to go somewhere else?" she asked quietly, worry in her deep brown eyes. "We could go to the diner…"

Jasper shook his head. "It's okay. Let's just stay here."

"Are you sure?" she pressed quietly.

He sighed softly, and kissed her forehead. "I'm sure, hon. Let's go." He took her hand again and led her into the building. The sheer volume of the voices inside made him wince, though he was internally glad for the festive atmosphere. He hoped it would pull him out of his funk. He knew things weren't as bad as they could have been; it just hurt knowing they'd be very carefully watched until the students were moved out after graduation, and possibly even beyond.

With the next day being a campus-wide holiday and barbeque, the dining hall staff had kept the menu options fairly simple. Jasper opted for a plate of spaghetti and a salad, while Bella met him near the registers with tacos, rice and beans. Edward was already waiting for them at the usual table, bright smiles on Emmett, Rose, and Alice's face due to the last day of class, but the faded a bit as Jasper and Bella approached the table.

"Dude, that's so not the face you're supposed to be a wearing on the last day of classes," Emmett protested. "One more week until we've got two months off, dude! Three weeks until my wedding. C'mon, Jas-man, you're not excited?"

Jasper shrugged as he took Bella's regular place in the middle, letting Edward and Bella flank him, trying to draw on their optimistic perspective that'd it all turn out okay.

"What happened, Jasper?" Rose asked a bit more tactfully.

"The dean found out about us," Bella answered before Jasper could. "He called Jasper into his office over lunch," she explained softly.

"We're not in trouble, "Edward rushed to assure the family. "But we're a bit shaken up by it."

Jasper's love for his partners swelled a bit more as they saved from having to go over it _again_.

"How'd he find out?" Alice asked.

"We weren't all that subtle in LA, Alice," Bella reminded her.

"You don't think Angela? I mean, we talked a bit, since she was confused why Bella didn't stay with us, after the James thing and-"

"Students," Jasper finally cut her off. "Students told their parents they saw things and the parents called the dean," he reported in a quiet voice. He wouldn't have his family rush to blame Angela.

"You're sure you're not in trouble?" Emmett repeated, a skeptical look on his face.

"The dean said it wasn't his business what we do in the privacy of our home," Jasper answered. Even to his own ears his voice sounded flat. Christ, he needed to get a grip on himself, it wasn't anywhere close to the end of his world. "We'll probably be watched like hawks until we move out after graduation though, and if anyone lodges a formal complaint, he'll go to the board."

"Dude," Emmett breathed. "That fucking sucks," he muttered.

Bella shrugged, mixing her rice and beans together with a bit of shredded cheese from the salad bar. "It could have been much much worse," she said quietly. Jasper felt her hand squeeze his thigh silently supportive.

"Yeah, but still…" Alice trailed off.

"It's just a couple of weeks," Edward said, attempting to sound more cheerful. "Besides, those two are going to be too busy with finals and speechifiyn' to worry, and we're going to talk to Carmen about stepping up the timeline on the house. We've got a couple more to look at this weekend, so maybe we'll find something.'

"'Speechifyin''? Been into the Firefly DVDs again?" Rose teased. "And that's right, you're both up for speaking at graduation. Lucky you," she quipped, sarcastically.

Jasper rolled his eyes. If the students hadn't asked, he'd probably have declined. But he was happy with the change of subject as he poked as his pasta. "Yeah. Guess I should work on that," he sighed. "Does this shindig require full regalia?"

"Yup," Bella said. "Esme can rent it for you, though, if you need to."

"No, I'm good. I just don't like it," he grumped to everyone's laughter.

"At least you have it to wear. I always look like a loser up there in my plain black," Edward said.

"More incentive for you to get your Master's then, huh?" Alice said with a grin. "And the hood will be such a manly shade of pink, too," she said with a giggle.

"Pink's a good color for you, Edward," Bella agreed off hand to more laughter.

As they continued to banter, Jasper felt his dark mood lift. Edward was right- they only had to endure about two more weeks – students had to be out by noon on Monday after graduation, the faulty that evening. He could deal with that.

"Do you want me to come over for awhile?" Edward asked as they left the dining hall. For once they hadn't been kicked out; it was saying open late for the students to hang out and celebrate the end of the year, as well as to decorate for the activities the next day.

"Yes," Jasper answered. "But you probably shouldn't."

"Yeah," Edward agreed with a sigh. "We could go to the house? He suggested half-heartedly.

Jasper kissed him quickly. "I'm okay. Go back to yours. I have work to do anyway." He was only telling a half-lie, and he had a feeling that Edward knew it.

"Okay. Love you."

Jasper smiled softly. "Love you, too. And you too, darlin'," he said to Bella.

She smiled. "I know," she said with a wink. She laughed softly as Alice took her arm and started leading her and Rose back to their dorm.

"You sure you'll be okay tonight?" Edward asked.

"I'm sure. I'll call or message you," Jasper promised.

Edward gave him a short nod, and Jasper caught the look his lover shared with Emmett, before he went off in the direction of his building and Jasper and Emmett walked together to their building. Jasper could see the beginning of the carnival going up around campus, things peeking over the roofs of building.

"Y'know…" Emmett started as they walked.

"Hm?" Jasper prompted after a moment when Emmett didn't say anything.

"Six months, hell, four months ago, you'd have run for the hills after something like this," Emmett observed. "Seems like my brother has been good for you, too."

Jasper grinned. He knew that Edward had been very good for him in a lot of ways. "Well, not just him, though he's the bigger part. I think having a family again has really helped, too. It's been so long since I've had that kind of support network."

Emmett dropped a heavy arm over Jasper's shoulders. "That's what family is for, man." Emmett dropped his arm. "It's just good to see you not pulling away from us with this. I know it's a big deal for the three of you, hell, I'm upset about it."

Jasper shrugged. "There's nothing we can do about it, though, and my pulling away to deal won't help anything in the long run. Like Bella said, it's not as bad as it could have been, and we're just going to have to be careful throughout finals week. After that, we'll deal. The hardest part though has been dealing with some of the feelings that came up with this. I had to hide who I was for a long time while I was in the corps, and I thought I was past that, for the most part," he explained, as they reached their building. "I mean, we've talked about keeping things quiet, to keep from having to face anything like this, so it doesn't do me any good to hide from it."

Emmett nodded as they walked down the hall, nodding at the students who greeted them. "So that's why you wanted to be alone tonight?" he asked skeptically.

Jasper shrugged again. "I _do_ have work to do, and after today I really don't want to risk anything."

"Mm," Emmett responded, not sounding convinced. "Alright, well you know where I'll be."

"Thanks, Em," he said as they let themselves into their rooms. Jasper dropped his bag on his bed and kicked off his shoes. He hit the play button on the iHome and let a soft Spanish guitar melody fill the room as he moved around the room, powering up his laptop and grabbing a bottle of water from the kitchenette.

Jasper occupied himself finishing up the last little bit of work for the school year, putting his status on the IM as 'busy.' There wasn't much for him to do; his finals were already finished and off to be copied and such for the next week, and he hadn't collected any homework since Tuesday. But he did have some paperwork to begin completing with the full time job, and Edward had found them an attorney who wanted some basic questionnaires filled out before they met after Emmett and Rosalie's wedding. There was also the small matter of his speech for the commencement ceremony a week from Saturday.

When he was finished with everything he sent a quick goodnight to Bella and Edward over the messenger system and closed everything down for the night. Sleep came easily, though he woke several times in the night from indistinguishable dreams.

Jasper's alarm went off at the normal time on Friday, and he pulled himself from bed, feeling a bit weary since his sleep had been so rough. But he changed quickly and met Emmett in the hall for their jog to the gym. They met up with Edward and went through their normal routine, which included Jasper stealing a heated kiss from Edward in the weight room while Emmet's back was turned.

The festivities on campus weren't due to start until nine, so Jasper lingered under the shower and read for a bit until he was expected to meet the others outside. He dressed as the faculty had been instruct ted, in jeans and his academy polo (any academy garb was fine), and his trainers. Throughout his morning he'd listened to the final sounds of prep for the carnival like day going on outside on the quad and around campus. For once it appeared that the weather was going to cooperate and sunshine beamed down on the campus. Still, Jasper grabbed the zip up hoodie with his mane and school emblem on the back that he'd gotten from the swim team, knowing it wasn't likely to be all that warm for most of the day.

Jasper hadn't paid much attention on his slow jog with Emmett to the gym, but multi-colored flags were flying high over the campus and as he walked toward the center of campus, booths, rides, and games became more clearly visible. It didn't take him long to find the others, standing in a group off to one side.

"Mornin'," Jasper greeted them, brushing his hand along Edward and Bella's with a smile.

They returned his greeting and Alice seemed extremely excited as she bounced on the balls of her feet. "Hi, Jazzy. C'mon, let's go," she said, taking Jasper's hand and tugging them further into the area where things had been set up. Jasper followed with a laugh, looking back over his shoulder at an amused Edward and Bella, who were walking close together, though not obviously touching, and Emmett and Rose were next to them, hand in hand as they followed a bit more sedately.

Most of the student organizations had booths set up for students to sign up for the next academic year or get more information. Jasper was supposed to put in some face time at the swim team and history club booths, and Edward had let him know that some students were interested in starting up a guitar club. Jasper wondered if moving off campus would diminish his requirement to be involved with extra-circulars. Until he found another hobby, though, he didn't mind. He had given some thought to asking Bella for more lessons of working with yarn. He'd enjoyed the easy rhythm that he'd found in making the piece for part of Esme's shawl; it had given him something focus on and quiet his mind while listening to music, and he thought he might like to do more of it.

The dining hall staff had set up two huge grills and spent the day cooking up a mass of burgers, hot dogs and garden burgers, and had put out a huge amount of sides and salads for everyone to keep helping themselves. There were also private vendors on hand "selling" sno-cones, funnel cake, and anything else Jasper could expect to find at a fair. All the students, staff, and faculty had been issued 25 tickets going in, and there was a booth where they could buy more to redeem for rides, games, or food that wasn't provided by the dining hall.

Bella had to help supervise the distribution of yearbooks just after noon, so everyone took that opportunity to check on the booths they were supposed to help out with. Jasper found everything happily under control at his two. He hung out for a few minutes chatting with the students running things and went off in search of the others and food.

It was a long day of fun, games, and food, and later in the afternoon the group found a place to sit together, and it wasn't long before they were swarmed with students looking them to sign year books or talk. It was a nice way to spend the last day of the term before finals, and it was great seeing the students blow off some steam.

Of course the joy of the day was dampened somewhat by Jasper being super conscious of is interactions with Edward and Bella. Even though it didn't appear that they'd been watched throughout the day, none of them wanted to risk it. They sat together, and hung out, of course, but exchanged little more than friends pecks on the cheeks or brushed of fingers against hands. It was incredibly frustrating for Jasper, who just wanted to be able to physically demonstrate his affection for his partners. Alice helped, some, by sitting with him too, but it was not the same for either of them, since he knew she was missing Charlotte.

Everything started winding down after dark. The dining hall and student activities building were staying open later, the former for studying with coffee and leftover food, and the latter for social time. Jasper was relieved that they didn't have to stay; the on-call faculty in residence were in charge of those supervisory efforts. Jasper and the others gratefully accepted Esme's early evening invitation to spend the weekend at the house.

Jasper and Emmett went to their building and quickly packed before meeting the others in the parking lot. They split up into the usual groups, Emmet and Rose volunteering to stop for beverages on their way. By the time they had all arrived, Carlisle had set up a projector in the basement, and as a large family they settled in to watched movies. Jasper finally got to relieve his need for contact with Edward and Bella as they cuddled together, the rest of their family around them.

The remainder of weekend was peaceful and lazy, except for venturing out to look at a few houses Saturday morning. Esme was already up when Jasper, Bella, and Edward went downstairs. They had their first appointment at nine, and Esme passed over three travel mugs and a paper bag of egg sandwiches and shuffled them out the door like a mom getting her three kids off to school.

They looked at four houses that morning. Jasper fought to not be swayed by some of the horrible tastes the current homeowners had, but it was hard to look past it sometimes.

It was the third house that they decided they loved. It only had three bedrooms, but there was already a dedicated office space off the family room. There was a large basement that had been carpeted and insulated that Jasper could easily see them setting up as a craft and hobby room. The master bedroom was downstairs, with an attached bath, and two bedrooms and a bathroom upstairs. The kitchen had been recently remodeled and included a small pantry and breakfast bar, and the dining room was open, looking out over the yard.

Carmen left them after the fourth house, and Jasper, Bella, and Edward went to the diner to talk about it. They agreed that there would need to be some work done; the master bathroom wasn't quite what they wanted, and they would need to expand on the closet space for the three of them to share, as well. But it was otherwise perfect, they thought, compared to the others they had looked at so far.

Rather than wait another week (or longer) and look at more properties, Bella called Carmen to make an offer slightly above the asking price. Carmen promised to get back to them as soon as possible. They decided to wait to tell the family until their offer had been accepted.

After dinner Saturday night, the couples all split up and Alice headed back to campus to begin packing up her things. She hadn't decided where she was spending the summer yet, at the Cullens' or with Charlotte. Jasper felt a bit guilty that they'd all coupled off around her, but she waved him off when he attempted to talk to her about it.

Jasper, Bella, and Edward watched TV in Edward's room, hand idly wandering under clothes, until they weren't paying attention to the screen anymore and there was a heap of clothes next to the bed. Giggles and squeaks and groans of pleasure replaced the soundtrack of the bad sci-fi made for TV movie they'd started out watching.

Their love-making was tender and filled with the promise of their new life to begin soon. There was no hurry as they physically demonstrated their love for each other, lips, tongues, fingers dancing across flesh. After Jasper had used his tongue to bring Bella to climax, she'd softly asked to watch him and Edward once again, and she pleasured herself as Jasper took Edward, all of them trying to maintain some contact throughout.

They fell asleep in a contented pile of limbs, quiet words of love passing between them in hoarse voices as they drifted off.

Sunday morning, as had become their custom, after they slept late, they went to the diner for breakfast before returning to campus.

Jasper's building was quiet, the students likely asleep or studying. He enjoyed an easy day on his own, mentally cataloguing what he needed to pack, reading and chatting with Edward and Bella over the messenger system. Late in the afternoon he pulled up the word document containing his commencement speech and tinkered with it until it was time for dinner.

xxx

Like the fall semester, finals were staggered into a block formation for the students, with Wednesday off as a study day. Jasper had six finals to proctor, with two on Tuesday and Thursday. He was thankful that Wednesday was a study day so he'd be able to get half of his grades in far ahead of the Sunday, noon, deadline (except for the graduating students, and those had to be done as soon as humanly possible so their graduation could be verified as quickly as possible, hopefully before the ceremony Saturday afternoon).

Jasper only had one final Monday morning, so after lunch, he went back to his room to start sorting through his things and packing. Unlike in years past, he had no plans to sell off or donate the thing that had made his living space comfortable, like the lamps and rugs. Between them, he, Edward, and Bella had very little furniture, and Jasper didn't want to get rid of anything before they got into their new place and figured out what they needed.

He pulled the boxes from under his bed and reassembled them, starting to get his books packed up so he could feel like he was doing something productive that afternoon while the others were busy.

Tuesday, Jasper proctored exams for two of his classes, one before lunch and one after, and spent the short time between the end of the second exam and dinner in the office, starting to get things organized and stuck away for the next academic year, or for easy packing if he was moved to another office (he really hoped he wasn't). He had a feeling he'd be back sometime in the first week after graduation to get things really cleaned up (unless he took a lot of breaks from grading on Wednesday and Friday afternoon).

There was another midnight breakfast study-break event for the students Tuesday night. Jasper and Emmett got into the spirit of it and wore pajama pants and hoodies over to the dining hall to supervise. Once again, there were stations of breakfast foods set up, and the tables were draped with butcher paper with boxes of crayons and markers sitting on the ends. Edward met them, similarly dressed, quickly followed by the girls, who were also in pjs.

Jasper was able to enjoy himself instead of being in intense pain like he had in the fall. They sat around and snacked on fresh waffles and fruit, having fun with each other as they doodled on the table and had coffee, enjoying the break as much as the students.

With no finals scheduled for Wednesday, Jasper and Bella shared the office in a mostly companionable working silence. Jasper had his headphones on most of the day as he buried himself in grading the first three sets of exams and tallying final grades to input into the system. Most of his students had, so far, done very well. Jasper hadn't really expected anything different; the students were largely at the Academy because they (or their parents) wanted to be and were paying the tuition to make it happen. He'd encountered the same thing at the previous schools he'd worked at.

Edward brought them lunch, providing them with a bit of a break before he went back to performing some of his own end of year things and Jasper and Bella went back to their grading. Jasper managed to get everything done by dinner, to his relief. Bella hadn't been quite so successful, having had four finals total on Monday and Tuesday, and portfolios to start reviewing as well.

Dinner was pretty low-key, since everyone had spent the day more or less doing the same thing, which just left them tired and subdued. Jasper was ready to get back to his room and relax for the night. He wasn't so excited about being on his own, but since the conversation with the dean, he, Bella, and Edward had really cut back on the amount of time they spent in each other's rooms, unless the others were present and the doors were left open. They didn't want to give the administration any reason to be suspicious.

Jasper spent the evening folding clothes into boxes and watching movies, after he remembered to set up a forwarding address to the Cullen home for his mail. He kept a messenger window open on the computer and kept only half an eye on it while he multi-tasked.

Thursday and Friday brought along more finals. Friday, after he grabbed a quick lunch after his morning exam, he barricaded himself in his office with his headphones on, wanting to have as much as possible finished before dinner so that he wouldn't have to spend too much time Saturday before the ceremony doing work. He was just grateful that he didn't have all that much stuff to pack.

The dorms were rocking Friday night when Jasper got back from dinner. There were parties on pretty much every floor campus wide. Jasper was stuck on his floor to supervise, but so were all the other in-residence faculty. It was a late night, but Jasper and Emmett managed to enforce quiet hours at 1 am. Not too long after, once Jasper had pulled his gown from the closet, he crashed, Edward's playlist sending him quickly into an easy sleep.

* * *

Edward and Pink: different academic disciplines have different colors in the Academic Costume Code. Music is pink, so when Edward completes his degree, the color that identifies his discipline will be pink on the black hood, along with whatever colors the university designates to identify itself (my hood is black with white for humanities, with green and yellow chevrons for my school).

**Want an outtake of what Bella and Edward got up to when Jasper went back to campus for the swim meet? How about the boys' POV while Bella was in Portland with Alice? I'm putting myself on the auction block for Fandom Gives Back: Eclipse. The auction opens on June 25. http:/www (dot) thefandomgivesback (dot) com**


	61. Chapter 60: Graduation

**Thanks as always to Naelany for her beta work.**

**Please see notes at the end**

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Saturday morning, Edward woke to his alarm. He sat up and scrubbed one hand over his face as he reached for his morning painkillers, taking in the mess of boxes around the room with bleary eyes. They had one more night on campus; the students had to be out by noon the next day, and the faculty were expected to follow by 5pm. He was looking forward to spending his final night in a twin-sized bed; even if they didn't get a house right away, they'd have the bed at his parents' house to share.

His suit and plain black gown were hanging from the closet as Edward limped slowly into the bathroom to shower and shave. They were supposed to meet up with the graduating class in the student services building for a special brunch before the departments held open houses in each of the buildings for parents to meet teachers and what not. The graduation ceremony itself was taking place at 2 in the afternoon, outside under huge tents, which would then be turned into the campus sponsored graduation party, and any students left on campus were welcome to attend; most of the students had started leaving as soon as their finals had ended.

Once he was appropriately groomed for the day, Edward dressed in a charcoal gray suit and pale yellow tie with a white shirt. Before he left, he shrugged into the jacket, leaving his robe aside in the room; he'd sneak back and get it after the open house so he wouldn't have to carry it and get it wrinkled or risk misplacing it.

Edward left with several minutes to make his way across campus. The brightly colored celebratory flags were back up, and Edward could see the tops of the large tents for the ceremony on the open quad area where the carnival had been the previous week. People were streaming toward the student activities building, mostly very well dressed, a mix of parents and students heading for the brunch.

He met up with his parents halfway there. Edward greeted his mom with a kiss on the cheek and they went into the building together. People swarmed and mingled, and the dining hall staff was getting everything finished up. Edward glanced around for the rest of his family as he mingled, and he caught Jasper and Bella's eyes from across the room where they likewise chatted with students and other faculty.

Once the buffet was ready, Edward joined the queue with the others and filled his tray with a plate of eggs Benedict, a fresh waffle and big serving of fruit salad. He wove his way carefully through the tables, his cane dangling from his forearm so he could manage the tray more easily as he navigated through the crowd to the table where his family was waiting.

Bella was dressed in the same dress she'd worn for Jasper's birthday dinner, which was probably smart as Edward remembered it being pretty light, and her full regalia for the ceremony was heavy and warm. Jasper was dressed pretty similarly to Edward in dark grey, but his shirt was a soft blue, and he'd opted against a jacket.

Conversation was light over breakfast, and after about twenty minutes, the Dean took the podium.

"Good morning students, family, faculty and friends," he said into the microphone. "With the many speakers we have lined up to speak at the ceremony later this afternoon, I thought I would give my remarks this morning, where you'll at least have fresh coffee to keep you awake through it," he joked.

The audience laughed good naturedly, and the Dean paused for a moment before continuing. He spoke for several minutes about how proud he was of the graduating class and their achievements. Dr. Harper complimented them on being upstanding citizens that would represent not only Forks, but their hometowns well as they went on to college and other endeavors.

When the Dean was finished, he invited the retiring teachers to speak as well, and they did for a few minutes, and Edward was happy to see that Dr. Anderson had come to the brunch to offer his well wishes to his students, and he looked fairly healthy.

After brunch, Edward bid his family a 'see you later,' and started toward the music building. Angela was there waiting, also dressed nicely, and they were quickly joined by the other faculty just as parents and students began to swarm the lobby of the building.

He spent the next hour speaking with parents and students as they rotated through the departments.

"Mr. Cullen?"

"Hi, Susan," he greeted her with a smile. "Excited?"

She nodded, but seemed fidgety and nervous. "Yeah, but. Uhm. I need to apologize."

"For what?" Edward asked, curious.

"I never meant for you, Dr. Swan, and Dr. Whitlock to get into any trouble," she said quietly and sighed. "I had only told my parents about how much happier you seemed since the beginning of the term when you…were…well, a bit of grump, and for the last couple years, really and…" she stopped suddenly, her cheeks going a bright pink. "Anyway, I'm sorry. I didn't think my parents would actually call the Dean, and I'm not sure if they're really upset anyway, but I know they're just over there staring at me and…" she trailed off again.

"Susan?" Edward prompted.

"Hm?"

"Breathe," he said with a smile and a light laugh. "There's nothing to apologize for. We didn't get in trouble," he assured her, which was pretty much the truth. "Though it's nice to know that you got around to telling your parents I wasn't a grump all the time," he teased.

She flushed again, looking a bit guilty, but Edward saved her. "C'mon, let me meet your parents, finally." Susan was from Minnesota originally and her parents had a difficult time making the trip to see her during the open house days scheduled during the academic year.

If her parents had any complaints, they didn't make them known to Edward as they spoke. Mostly they gushed over how much Susan had enjoyed playing with the bands and that she was looking forward to playing in college while Susan just looked embarrassed. Finally she dragged them off to another building, casting a long-suffering look over her shoulder at Edward.

Once the open department hours had ended, Edward made his way quickly back to his dorm room, and traded his suit jacket for his black gown. He grabbed the bag with his folder of scores and baton and was happy to skip out on the lining up for the processional into the ceremony, since he got to direct the music.

The students who were playing for the ceremony began to trickle in when Edward arrived at the tents. They were all seated and ready when he'd asked them to be, and Edward ran them through a quick warm up as a group before letting them continue on their own, tuning them up about ten minutes before he expected to see the student that would cue him to begin the music. There was a palpable excitement under the tents as family filled the seats, their voices carrying through the space.

At 2:02, Edward got the signal to begin. They played the traditional processional of Pomp and Circumstance, though Edward insisted, as Dr. Anderson had done in previous years, on playing the entire march, not just the familiar refrain.

Edward had timed the music just right and the band played for another minute before reaching the end of the march. The assembled students and faculty sat once the music ended, and Edward double checked his program before he sat in the chair just to one side of the band, so he could see the stage.

Jasper and Bella were sat in the front row with the other faculty, the students organized in alphabetical order behind them, everyone's faces turned up to the stage as the Dean took to the podium.

"Students, parents, faculty, friends and community members, welcome to the graduation ceremonies for the Forks Academy class of 2010." The Dean paused to allow for applause. "I want to especially thank Mr. Cullen and members of the younger classes for providing the music for us here today."

Edward rose and acknowledged the audience, rolling his eyes at his brother's exuberance from his place amongst the faculty.

"Now, I know that you are mostly looking forward to getting your diploma into your hands," Dr. Harper continued. "But we have several speakers today, three of whom were chosen by the student body. Before we turn to the first of those selected speakers, however, it's traditional for one of the board members to speak."

The Dean introduced the man to speak, and Edward paid semi-polite attention to the man's words, while looking through the crowd. Applause roused him, and Edward checked his program again while Dean Harper claimed the podium again.

"Our next speaker came to us this year from a school in Colorado, on a temporary position. While here, he mentored our intramural swim team and worked with the history club, and proved himself an invaluable member of the community not only for his quick thinking which saved many lives, but for his ways of teaching history that bring the past within reach for our students. I'm proud to announce that Dr. Jasper Whitlock will be joining the faculty full time next term, and that the students have selected him as one of their faculty speakers today. Dr. Whitlock?"

Jasper rose from his seat to applause, and it took him a minute to reach the stage, his maroon robes moving with him as he walked across to the microphone and shook the Dean's hand before adjusting his notes on the lectern.

"I never sought to be a hero," Jasper began boldly. "When I joined the Marine Corps out of high school, I never planned on becoming a hero. I wanted to do something bigger than my home town would let me, and to serve my country, like my daddy and his daddy had. And when I decided to become a teacher, after my military career didn't work out, I never thought that it would make me a hero, either. I just wanted to share my love of history with people, even if those people maybe wouldn't appreciate it as much as I would," he teased to laughter.

"But this year has brought me many things, including, unfortunately, that label of hero. This year has labeled me many different things, lover, friend, brother, mentor, coach, among a couple of less flattering nick names that y'all seem to think we don't know about." He paused again to allow laughter, and Edward found himself joining in. "I'm proud to wear all those labels, and I know I wouldn't have them if I hadn't decided to come here this year." Jasper paused and looked down at his notes, smiling when he looked back up. "I know this speech should be about the graduating class, but you voted me up here, and y'all didn't tell me what I had to say."

There were a few cheers from the audience as people laughed again.

"I want to leave you with some advice today," Jasper continued. "You're young, and you may think that you're invincible," he said. "I hate to burst your bubbles, but you're really not. You will experience heartache, you will experience pain, but it's what you do with those experiences that will continue to shape you into the adults that you're already becoming. I hope that none of you will follow in my path and cut yourselves off from people when things get difficult.

"One thing that I've learned this year is the value of family. I've had the great fortune to come into two families this year. And it was through the understanding and support of both of those families that I've been able to really find myself again. So, to you, class of 2010, as you go on to college, and endeavors future, to continue to gain the independence you've been developing here at Forks Academy, the best advice I can give you is to not forget your families. Treasure the time you have with them, both your family of blood, and the extended family that you've had here at the school.

"I have a few more pieces of wisdom and advice to share before I turn the lectern back to Dr. Harper," Jasper continued with a grin. "Wear clean underwear, because you never know when you'll be hit by a bus, or find 'the one' at a party," he said, making air quotes with his fingers when he said it. "Use protection," he said a bit more seriously. "Don't waste your time hating; life's too short. Follow your bliss."

Jasper paused again. "I know this is something that's probably over used, but take it from someone who has spent too much of their life ignoring it. Dance like no one is watching. Love like you'll never be hurt. Sing like no one is listening. Live like it's heaven on Earth," he quoted. "Be proud of who you are, class of 2010. Don't let who you are stand in the way of your dreams.

"I leave you with one final thing. 'Not all who wander are lost.' Don't worry if it takes you awhile to find yourself, or figure out your major, or don't get married when everyone around you does. Just be the fantastic people that I know you all are, and the great men and women that you've proven yourselves to be.

"So, congratulations, class of 2010. I wish you all the best as you depart to figure out your futures." With that, Jasper stepped back from the lectern as applause rang out from the audience, with more than a few students standing up to cheer as Jasper shook hands with Dr. Harper, then the hands of a few members of the board. The audience was still clapping as Jasper descended from the stage and took his seat in the front row of the faculty, next to Bella.

"At this point, we'd like to recognize a few members of our graduating class for some outstanding achievements," the Dean continued. He called out the names and awards of a few students, who rose from their seats to wave with the applause. Among them were students who had received significant merit based scholarships for academics, music, or sports.

"Our second faculty speaker," Dr. Harper continued, "Is a very popular member of the English department. She hosts an annual writer's conference on campus and oversees the yearbook committee and creative writing club. Please welcome Dr. Bella Swan."

Bella paused for a moment after taking the lectern, waiting for the cheers and applause to die down. "You'd think," she began. "That someone who has published a novel a year for quite a few years now could come up with something to say," she said lightly. "But the fact is, the more I tried to write something in advance to say today, the less I could come up with the words. So, I'm just going to have to wing it a bit and speak from my heart.

"I know that my role here is that of a teacher, but I also know that we never truly stop learning. I've learned a lot his year, about life, the harsh realities of domestic abuse, and what it means to truly love someone, and to learn to love and trust yourself.

"College is a time of discovery and learning, and you may figure some of those things out sooner than I, or your classmates. But as Dr. Whitlock said, don't compare your 'learning curve' to others – you're all unique individuals, gorgeous flowers that make up a garden that I've had the great privilege to watch burst to life in my time here at Forks Academy. So if it takes you a bit longer to bloom than others, don't worry; you'll get there.

"There is one lesson that I hope you don't have to learn, and that's the pain that comes from an abusive relation," Bella said, her voice firm. "I had meant to speak on this at the conference earlier this year, before we were so rudely interrupted," she said lightly.

The audience tittered nervously, unsure if they should laugh. Edward glanced over and caught Jasper's encouraging nod and wide grin.

"I really hate to inject a heavy dose of realism into today, for all of you graduates who are excited to step out on your own. But the real world can be a scary place, and before I let you go, I have one more short lesson."

Bella paused again momentarily. "No one ever has the right to tell you that you're not good enough, that you're not pretty enough, that you're not skinny enough. I think I've taught every single one of you at some point in my three years here, and if anyone tries to tell you those things, they're just wrong. Anyone who says that they love you will love you for you are and not try to shape or control you. You are all beautiful, smart, and talented young men and women. Don't let someone try to tell you differently.

"I thought I had found someone to love me – he told me so all the time. But his actions betrayed his words. Sometimes we're so quick to throw those three words out there. But no one who loves you will be purposefully harmful or hurtful, physically, mentally, or verbally, because if they love you, truly, it will hurt them even more than it would hurt you," Bella concluded, glancing between Jasper, Edward, her hands, and the students.

"Many of you are off to the same schools. Take care of each other, even if it's only carpool home for the holidays. Though I really recommend sharing car packages from home – it'll make you friends for life," she said with a bright smile. "But remember that family you had here in Forks. College can be a big scary place, even for students like you who have lived pretty independently for years. Look out for each other. Get to know your R.A. if you're living in the dorms. Don't be afraid to make new friends, but try not to lose touch with the old ones. You're going out into the world, but you're not alone. Many have gone before you, and endless will go after.

"As Milady Anae would say to you, 'May your journeys be ones of enlightenment'."

"And may the spirits guide your path," a good chunk of the audience, students included, responded. Edward grinned as he said the words with them and Bella blushed, her eyes bright.

"Congratulations, Forks Academy class of 2010. It has been my great pleasure to have been invited to speak today, and I wish you all the very best of luck in your future."

She stepped back from the podium to a swell of applause, and was embraced by the Dean before she made her way carefully down the stairs to her empty seat in the front row.

Dr. Harper took the podium again and introduced the Valedictorian and some of her accomplishments, much like he had for Jasper and Bella.

The Valedictorian's speech was fairly generic and Edward listened just enough to know when to start the band playing again. He felt slightly guilty for tuning the girl out, but she honestly wasn't talking to him anyway.

After the speeches, Edward was programmed to have the band play a special piece of music, which they did, while the Dean, his mother, and members of the board got everything set up on stage to present the diplomas.

Once the applause had faded away, Edward took his seat to one side of the band again and watched as the Dean called each of the 100 graduating students by name, and presented them with the leatherette folder containing their diploma. After they shook his hand they all received an earnest hug from Esme, before going down the line of the board members and receiving handshakes then departing the other side of the stage to retake their seats.

When the last student had taken their seat, Dr. Harper spoke again.

"Ladies and gentlemen, I present you with the Forks Academy Class of 2010," Dr. Harper announced with a bright smile and behind Edward, the students cheered. He turned to look over his shoulder as caps were thrown high into the air with laughter and applause surrounding them. As the board and Dean left the stage, Edward cued the band to begin the recessional music; it was a short piece to accompany the board and faculty off, the students scattering as soon as they were released to find their families and friends and show off their diplomas.

"Thank you," Edward said to the band when they were finished. "Don't worry about cleaning up. Enjoy the party, and I'll see you back next year," he said, and the students applauded. "Leave your music on the stands, please, and I'll collect it." He chatted with a few graduates while the underclassmen finished packing up and also scattered into the crowd.

Once everyone had dispersed, Edward went in search of his family, unzipping his black robe so that it billowed behind him as he walked and he could get some air circulating around his body. It wasn't that warm of a day, being Forks, but the tents had kept air from moving around too much, and the black grown really didn't breathe.

Off to one side the dining hall crew was serving up slices of congratulatory cake and punch while students had pictures taken with their diplomas from a combination of Alice's art students and a few professionals hired for the day. Underclassmen who hadn't left yet circulated amongst the graduates, seeing off friends or scoping out the free food. The official campus party wouldn't last too long; most of the graduates and their families would be headed into town for dinner off campus before returning to finish packing up for trips home.

Eventually, he spotted Jasper speaking with a students and parents, and Bella was likewise occupied with a woman. Leaving them to their mingling responsibilities, he angled himself toward Emmett and Rosalie, who were also chatting, but outside the main crowd of the party. They'd both also unzipped their robes, revealing professional dress underneath.

"I'm so ready to get out of here," Emmett whined quietly.

"Tired of the schmoozing?" Edward asked, teasing.

"I'm hungry," Emmett grumped.

"Come on, then, you big baby. Let's see what hors devours we can find," Rosalie offered. "Carlisle and Esme were looking for you. They're hanging by Emma and David in the audience."

"Everything's okay?" Edward asked.

Rosalie nodded. "Esme was just tired. Anyway, we're meeting up at the house for dinner in a bit. I think you might need to rescue Bella and Jasper or they'll never get out."

Edward located his lovers back in the crowd once more and noted that each of them had a small circle of people hanging around. "Yeah, you might be right about that."

At Emmett's compliant of hunger, Rosalie kissed Edward's cheek and led Emmett off to feed him something to tide him over until the family dinner.

Edward decided he'd wait awhile before rescuing Jasper and Bella. They had both given wonderful speeches, and he didn't doubt that not all of their students who wanted to visit with them would have had time during the open departments that morning. So instead, he went in search of his parents and aunt and uncle.

He found them sitting in a row of chairs, chatting with some of the school staff, and the occasional parents who drifted by with their kid. Edward took a chair in the row in front of them, turning to sit sidewise and face them.

"Great music choices, Edward," David complimented him. "Seems like you've done okay switching over."

Edward nodded. "I'm enjoying it. I think I've found a program to do online to get my Master's like the administration asked, so it looks like it might be permanent."

"That's wonderful, Edward. And things with all of you…?" Emma asked.

Esme laughed quietly. "We're fine, Aunt Emma," he teased back. "We've been looking at houses, and we're all here next year."

"Good for you," she said with a bright smile. "It's so great to see you all growing up and happy."

"I know," Esme agreed, and Edward watched his mom and her sister exchange a look and then laughingly drape arms over each other's shoulders.

"How long are you going to give Jasper and Bella?" Carlisle asked, shaking his head at his wife.

Edward shrugged. "Probably until one of them texts me to get them out of there," he answered. "If you're ready to go home, we'll meet up with you when they're finished. It could be awhile."

Carlisle glanced at Esme. "We'll wait awhile longer. There's no one clamoring for your attentions today?"

"I think I got to see everyone earlier," Edward answered. He was really okay with stepping out of the spotlight and letting his lovers have the moment, and just spending time with his family. He continued to chat with all of them until Rosalie and Emmett found them, followed shortly by Alice.

Esme decided she was ready to head home and start dinner, so she left with Carlisle, Emma, and David, and Rosalie and Emmett followed with Alice. Edward remained sitting in the audience as the crowd began to thin out as families realized the time and the dining hall crew began to pack things up.

"Hey."

Edward looked up into Jasper's face, then over to Bella who was tucked slightly under his arm. "Finally escaped?" Edward teased. They'd both unzipped their robes, and Bella had her hood draped over her arm. Jasper was still wearing his.

"I think everyone was finally ready for dinner," Bella answered with a smile.

"Someone remind me of this when they ask me to speak next year," Jasper said, looking worn thin from all the people that had been gathered around him for the afternoon.

"Why? Will it actually change your mind about doing it?" Edward asked as he rose.

Jasper shrugged and grinned tiredly. "Probably not."

Bella laughed softly and slipped from under Jasper's arm to stand with Edward.

"Ready to go home?" Edward asked.

"Please," Bella answered with a nod. Together they made their way to Edward's car. Bella stripped out of her formal gown as they walked, draping it over her arm with a happy sigh.

When they reached the house, Bella went upstairs to change into something more comfortable for the evening, while Edward and Jasper joined Rose, Emmett, Carlisle, David and Alice in the living room, reminiscing over graduations past, their own and those at the academy.

Jasper jumped up at a squeal from upstairs and started moving toward the base of the stairs, Edward just behind him.

Bella came flying down the stairs, dressed in yoga pants and two different colored layered tank tops, her hair streaming behind her as she laughed when she tripped over the bottom step, falling into Jasper's arms. "We got the house!" she called, her phone still clutched in her hand. "Carmen called while we were at school. The sellers accepted the offer and we're going to be able to move in right after the 1st of August!"

"Wait, house, what house?" Alice demanded, while Esme and Carlisle offered their congratulations, echoed by Emmett and Rosalie who had closed on theirs a couple of weeks before.

Jasper kissed Bella deeply before setting her back on her feet, where she turned to Edward and he wrapped his arms around her waist from behind, settling his chin on her shoulder. "Our house," Edward answered simply.

"It's not totally perfect, but we're going to find a contractor and fix up what we want, which are mostly little things," Jasper answered.

"But we're not going to have to go back to the dorms next semester," Bella said, quite happily. "Tonight will be our last night," she said, almost wistfully.

"Well then, we'll just have to make the best of it," Alice declared. "I'm not letting go of my suitemate without some kind of slumber party."

Everyone laughed as they filed into the kitchen for dinner. They next afternoon they'd all be back at the house for a couple of weeks. Emmett and Rosalie were moving into their house after the wedding, which was in three weeks, and Alice said she'd probably be bouncing back and forth between Portland and Forks, so she'd take the basement guest room. They talked about their summer plans over the meal. Emma and David were staying indefinitely, and Esme would be starting radiation after the wedding.

Edward, Jasper, and Bella still hadn't finalized any plans, but they were tossing around the idea of going to Texas for a week or two. Jasper seemed open to the idea, and Bella was gently encouraging him to agree.

After dinner and dessert they piled back into their cars to return to a minimally occupied campus. Alice linked her arm with Bella's and dragged her off to their building, giving her just enough to kiss Jasper and Edward quickly.

"Last time," Jasper said quietly as they remained standing at the Volvo's rear bumper as the girls walked away. "No more nights alone after this."

Edward hummed his agreement, though he knew it wasn't exactly true. Still he got the sentiment Jasper was trying convey. "All packed?"

Jasper nodded. "Pretty much."

"Walk you home?" Edward offered.

Jasper grinned. "Sure. Gonna quiz me about my family and relationship status again?" he teased.

Edward laughed softly and brushed the fingers of his free hand against Jasper's. "Why, got someone I don't know about?"

Jasper echoed Edward's laughed as they started off toward Spader hall. "Nope. I've got everything I need."

* * *

Anae is the heroine of Bella's novels. if you go to mfic(dot)livejournal(dot)com and click on the tag for Arbiter in the sidebar, you'll find some of the drabbles I've written in that universe, and I think the first couple of chapters for the first 'novel' for those characters.

This story was always meant to eclipse the academic year, and anything that would follow would either be anti-climactic, or force me to drag the story on for more chapters than I'd like. Not to worry, though, there is still an epilogue and several outtakes to come. I do not anticipate that there will be a full sequel, though there may be some future-takes posted to the outtake story "Walks in the Garden."

**The epilogue will be posted next Thursday.**

Thank you all for reading and loving this story and these characters as much as I have. Big thanks to Naelany for stepping up to beta after teasing me for previews. Super thanks to drtammy1511 for all her help with the medical stuff.


	62. Chapter 61: Epilogue: Sept 2019

Thank you, one last time for this story, to Naelany for her fantastic support as a beta, pre-reader, and friend. I look forward to working with you on the next one. :D

More notes at the end.

* * *

**Labor Day, 2019**

Ten years after Jasper arrived in Forks for the first time, he found himself, and his family, back at the Cullen home to celebrate Labor Day and the beginning of the school year. "Tony, slow down!" He called as their not-quite-four year old son tore through the house on his way to the backyard, seeking out his cousins who were more than likely around the pool.

"Did I see my grandbaby run through here?" Esme asked, emerging from down the hall.

"Of course," Edward said dryly, smiling as he kissed her cheek. "Who else?"

"Well, with that hair," Bella teased, hugging her (all but legally) mother-in-law, then taking a couple of the bags that Jasper carried so he could do the same. "He's really not inconspicuous."

Anthony Dale Swan was obviously Edward's biological son, with his hair and nose, but his eyes were all Bella's, deep brown and expressive.

"Well if he's anything like Edward was at that age, you all certainly have your hands full," Esme teased as she folded Jasper into a hug. She'd been cancer free for ten years after her surgery and radiation, and since then, the family had participated in many of the local events geared toward raising money for research as well as treatment options for low-income women.

"And it's not like his Uncle Em is a great influence, either," Jasper teased as Carlisle appeared from his study.

Both in their mid-sixties, Carlisle and Esme were still active. Esme had retired a couple of months before Rose had her and Emmett's first, Bree, so that she was available for babysitting. She still tinkered with interior design, her career before she'd started taking up administrative duties at the school, but primarily if asked she told everyone she was 'just a proud grand-mama to four beautiful kids.' Briana (or Bree as she preferred), a very precocious nine (and had clearly been a honeymoon baby), had two younger brothers, Noah, five, and the toddler Sam, who had turned three back in March. All the grandchildren were spoiled rotten.

Once they'd said their hellos to Carlisle, they trailed Esme through the kitchen, dropping off the brownies and salad Bella had made and followed the noise pollution out to the back yard. Bella made a happy sounding squeal and walked quickly around the deck to embrace Alice. "You didn't say you were coming!"

"We didn't know if we'd be able to make it," Charlotte admitted, accepting Bella's hug with a bright smile as Jasper and Edward made their way more sedately around the pool, waving at Emmett and Rosalie who were sitting on the edge of the pool, feet in the water as they watched the kids play. After Charlotte had finished her doctorate, she and Alice had, after several rough patches due to their long distance relationship, relocated to the East coast. Charlotte was a lobbyist for several health organizations and Alice took a position teaching kindergarten and maintained a small art studio.

"We thought it'd be better to surprise you, so you wouldn't be disappointed if it fell through," Alice said, hugging each of them. "It feels like it's been so long," she complained; they hadn't gotten together since Easter.

"It's so good to see you," Jasper said quietly as he hugged Alice. "Did Tony say hi, or go straight into the pool?" he asked.

Everyone laughed. "He waved," Charlotte admitted.

Charlotte had offered to be a surrogate for them, after the three of them had decided it wasn't a good idea to keep trying to have children. Before Bella had gotten pregnant with Tony she'd miscarried once and they'd lost one baby, a girl they'd named Abigail, who had been born too early and hadn't lived more than a few days in the NICU. It had been a really rough time for them, and Bella had really struggled with depression, guilt, and her self-esteem plummeted for awhile at her perceived failure at being able to bring a child into the world and be a mother. Edward and Jasper had of course been nothing but supportive, but Jasper had eventually drawn a line and forced her and Edward to come with him to see Dr. Jones when it became clear that Dr. Stevens wasn't helping (or Bella wasn't being honest with her). It had taken time, but eventually Bella realized it hadn't been her fault, and a couple of years later, she went back off the pill, deciding that she was ready to get pregnant again.

When Bella had conceived Tony, she'd been placed on almost immediate bed rest, and Tony had still been born premature. When they'd decided they were ready for a second child (the most recent time only a year behind them), they were unsuccessful. Bella had miscarried twice more, and Jasper couldn't put them through another loss like that again. He and Edward had gone and gotten vasectomies, Bella went back on the pill (for health reasons as much as a backup contraception), and they discussed their options for adoption.

With the family attorney they'd hired to put together trusts and wills, and medical proxies for each other, they'd worked out their options. They could have adopted privately, or, rather, Bella could have, but the attorney, a Mr. Jenks, had advised them that even a private adoption would be rough, given Bella's relationship status. They had looked further into it, made some contacts within the growing poly-relationship community in Seattle and online, and had ultimately decided that Tony would be an only child; but with his cousins, he never lacked for childhood companions.

They had thanked Charlotte for her thoughtfulness but had ultimately, gently, turned her down, even after they'd pretty much exhausted their chances for adoption. As much as they loved her and Alice, they hadn't wanted to put someone through that just so they could have a bigger family. They had come to terms with the hand they'd been dealt, through many sessions with Dr. Jones, who had taken on all three of them as a family counselor, and a lot of journaling, talking, and tears.

Instead of increasing their own family they mentored and kept active in the community. Bella had gone on sabbatical to comply with the doctor's order of bed rest when she got pregnant, and continued the time off for the remainder of the academic year after Tony was born. Once he'd started daycare shortly before his 1st birthday, Bella went back to teaching at the Academy, mornings only. In the afternoons she looked after Tony and tutored students in their neighborhood, or wrote while Esme got quality time with Tony. Jasper and Edward had kept up their monthly visits with the children at the hospital, taking Tony once he was old enough to understand what they were doing. Jasper was looking forward to getting their son into Cub Scouts in a couple years and being active in that group. So they maintained a pretty active role in the community and had been surprised to find that their relationship hadn't created as big a stir as they'd expected. But then, they'd become a lot more practiced at being discrete over the last decade.

Edward had gone far beyond the Master's Degree that the school had required of him and had managed to complete his PhD after a lot of support from the family. He was the third Dr. Cullen, and Bree liked to go around and inform everyone that she would be the fourth, since her mama didn't count, much to Rosalie's amusement. There had been some touch and go times while he was working on his dissertation with a baby in the house and two working partners, but somehow they always managed to work things out, even if one of them ended up in the guest room for a few days.

But otherwise, they had easily settled into life with each other. They'd been able to move into their new home before school had resumed after their first summer together, which no doubt made the chances of their making a relationship work that much better. By moving into their own home they'd prevented any more trouble with the school, and as much as it pained them, when Edward went on trips with the students, they took the dean's advice and Jasper and Bella didn't accompany him (at least not together, especially once Tony arrived).

Esme and Carlisle carried a tray of drinks and snacks out onto the patio and called for the grandbabies to take a break. Jasper would be in charge of the grill a bit later in the afternoon, when everyone was ready for dinner of burgers for the kids (and Emmett), steaks or chicken.

"_Tía_ Char, _tía_ Char!" Tony chirped as he climbed from the pool, his toddler's body already displaying traits that marked him as being Edward's son, and he was clearly going to take after his father's height.

Charlotte laughed as his dripping body slammed into hers for a hug. "_Hóla, chico_," Charlotte answered, hugging him back. "You're so much bigger than the last time I saw you," she commented. "How old are you now, ten?"

"No, _tía_ Char I'm almost four!" Tony insisted, holding up three fingers and wiggling his pinky to show the 'almost.' "Rember? You and Aunty Ali gived me the drums for my birfday!"

"Oh, that's right. Have you been practicing lots for mama and your daddies?"

Jasper shot her a dark look. He had never been so thankful for their well insulated basement as when Tony had opened that box with a happy squeal at his last birthday and insisted that his daddies get it set up "right now!" But his happiness had been worth setting aside room in the large family room/craft area they'd set up, even though Tony had pouted that it couldn't be set up next to daddy Edward's piano in the first floor formal living room.

He nodded enthusiastically. "But Daddy Edward says hafta to use practice pads first," he said with a frown. "They're not loud."

"That's the point," Edward grumbled beside Jasper while everyone else laughed.

"Well, Daddy Edward will be able to get his revenge soon enough," Charlotte announced.

Esme looked up in surprise, a bright smile on her face and Jasper heard a happy sounding noise from Bella.

"You're going to have a baby?" Rosalie asked, excited. Her three were a handful, but if it were up to her, she'd have three more. Emmett had, for once, kind of put his foot down and they'd agreed to hold off for awhile.

"Well, not just yet," Alice answered as Tony looked confused about what was happening. "Honey, go play with Bree, Noah, and Sam. We brought you some new toys," she said to Tony.

"Yay! Thanks Aunt Ali!" he hugged her quickly and scampered off to the shady corner where the other three kids were playing on a blanket. Esme had already dropped off sippy cups of lemonade for the little ones, and Bree had her own red cup with her name scrawled on it.

Jasper and Edward sat and Bella perched on both of their laps. "What do you mean not yet?" Bella asked.

Alice and Charlotte sat close together on one of the other chairs, and Alice leaned against Charlotte, taking her hand. "Char's going to get inseminated when we get back to Virginia," she said. "We've got an appointment in two weeks. The doctors don't think I'd be a good candidate for pregnancy, since I'm so small," she said sadly, "But fortunately, Charlotte's built for making babies," she teased as she pinched her partner's hip.

"We found an anonymous donor through a service, and have a full medical history and all that," Charlotte explained, slapping away Alice's hand with a playful smile. "We'd been thinking about it for awhile now, and it's just time."

"Congrats you two," Bella said, sliding from Jasper and Edward's knees to hug them. "You're gonna be great parents."

"Have you told your families yet?" Esme asked, probably thinking of Emma.

"Nope," Alice said with a grin. "We're waiting to get pregnant first," she explained.

"Emma's going to be thrilled," Esme said.

"I'm putting you in charge of keeping her from spilling the beans, Carlisle," Charlotte said playfully, pointing between the two of them as everyone else laughed. "You know she can't keep a secret from her sister. At least I know where Alice gets it."

"Hey!" Alice protested. "I just like to share!"

Jasper choked on the drink of lemonade he'd just taken and spluttered.

"Not like that, you perv," Alice said, throwing a piece of carrot at him. "Not all of us are so greedy."

That set everyone laughing again. It had taken awhile, but eventually the playful teasing of Edward, Bella, and Jasper's life had become normal. Fortunately, they'd been able to keep their life pretty quiet and out of the gossip mill at school, and their family supported them wholeheartedly.

"Daddy Jasper?" Tony appeared and Bella slipped into mommy mode, wiping smears of chocolate chip cookie from his face.

"Yeah, kiddo?"

"Can I have more lemade?" He held out his empty cup.

"Why don't you go ask Nana Esme," Jasper suggested. "I think she's sad because you didn't stop to give her a hug when we got here."

"Oops?" He flashed Jasper the smile that was all Edward's.

"Yeah, oops, little man. Go on," Bella chided him, kissing his cheek.

"Ew," Tony groaned, wiping his cheek with his hand before bee-lining for Esme and the pitcher of lemonade. "Nana Esme!"

"You know," Edward said softly as they watched their son interact with his grandmother. "I don't think she'll ever get tired of hearing that."

"And she'll have Alice and Char's kid calling her the same thing," Jasper responded.

They spent the day around the pool, playing and talking. Jasper fired up the grill in the late afternoon and got the kids (and Emmett) fed first before throwing on the meat for the adults.

In the evening, Carlisle started a fire in the pit and Esme presented the kids with skewers and marshmallows and helped them make s'mores, giving the monsters one last sugar high. Fortunately, she helped to clean them up before they crashed.

Their family nights had gotten shorter when they'd all started having children, so it wasn't that late when Carlisle helped Emmett and Rose bundle their three into the newly acquired mini-van, and Jasper carried Tony to the car and fastened him into his booster seat in the backseat of the Volvo.

When it came time to start getting ready for bed, Tony argued that he didn't need a bath since he'd spent all day in the pool. He lost, and Edward drew bath duty, while Jasper got some laundry going, and Bella threw together Tony's lunch for daycare the next day. Laughter and happy squeals drifted down from the upstairs bathroom while Jasper joined Bella in the kitchen once the washer was running.

"Hey," Jasper greeted her, wrapping his arms around her waist from behind. "Did you have a good day?"

"Yeah. It was good to see Alice and Charlotte," she said. They still got together with the rest of the family every couple of weeks, so seeing them had made the day special. "I miss them."

Jasper kissed her temple. "Me too. But they're happy. And it's not like you don't talk to them almost every day," he teased, pinching her side. "And they'll be here for Christmas in a few months."

"I know," she sighed, turning in Jasper's arms. "But it's not the same." She rested her head on his chest.

Jasper tipped her face up and kissed her softly. Bella hummed softly and hugged him around his waist. She smiled softly when she pulled away, and turned back around to finish packing up Tony's lunch of pb&j, grapes, and a handful of animal crackers with a frozen juice box. She also added a small bag of baby carrots and another of yogurt raisins for snacks. Another thing that had thankfully not been a problem with their boy had been getting him to eat.

Jasper reached over her shoulder and swiped a carrot from the larger bag, earning him a swat to the forearm.

"Esme's going to pick up Tony tomorrow," Bella reminded him as she started cleaning up the fixings for lunch. "I've got that conference call thing with my editor."

"Yup, we'll pick him up from their house after school," Jasper responded. "Should we grab something for dinner?"

Bella shook her head. "I've got something defrosting; I'll throw it on the crockpot when I get home."

"Okay." Jasper helped her finish cleaning up and move everything to the fridge, before wrapping his arms around her again. They swayed quietly together to unheard music for a few minutes.

The sound of little feet and an awkward gait carried down the stairs, and Jasper released Bella. They met Edward and Tony at the bottom of the stairs. Anthony had picked out the blue camo shorts and t-shirt pajamas for the night, and Edward had changed into a t-shirt and flannel pants.

"Mama, mama!" Tony said, jumping off the last step. "I gets to go back to school tomorrow!"

"Yes you do, baby," Bella agreed with a smile. It had been somewhat of a relief to all of them that he had taken so well to pre-school and daycare. Though they could have easily afforded for one of them to stay home, it was great for Tony's development to be around kids his age a little each day. "Are you excited?" she asked.

"Yup!" he cried as they moved into the family room. Tony drug out the mats they used for their evening routine of stretches and yoga as he babbled about his friends and teachers. They'd incorporated Edward's need to maintain his flexibility and Bella's yoga into their before-bedtime routine with Tony. He benefited from the yoga too, and the quiet time to relax and focus helped him get settled before stories and bedtime.

Jasper popped in one of the family yoga DVDs they'd accumulated while Tony settled on to his child-sized mat between Edward and Bella, wiggling a little as he waited for the video to start. When he had it queued up, Jasper took his place on the orange mat next to Edward's green. For twenty minutes they were mostly quiet as they followed the video, ending with a few minutes of quiet breathing accompanied by soft music.

"Okay, Ant," Jasper said quietly. "Upstairs to brush your teeth and pick out a story. Mama and Daddy Edward will be up in a minute." Jasper pulled himself to his feet, then reached a hand down to Tony, who grabbed it and gave a happy giggle-squeal as Jasper jerked him upright.

Jasper followed the toddler upstairs and into the bathroom, leaning against the door as his son flittered through brushing his teeth, using the toilet and washing up after. By the time Tony had crawled into bed, Edward and Bella had joined them, Bella with a sippy cup of water in her hand. Tony picked out a story and a reader (Edward read Goodnight Moon, and Jasper and Bella rotated through Richard Scarry's Bedtime Stories), and his eyes were heavy by the time they finished. Hugs and kisses were exchanged, and the nightlight in the corner barely illuminated their son's room after Jasper turned out the light and closed the door most of the way behind him.

Once they'd double checked that the doors were locked and the lights were out, Edward, Bella, and Jasper headed for their bedroom. Bella closed, but didn't lock, their bedroom door behind them. The small chain of bells they'd attached to the door knob gave them enough warning if Tony came wandering downstairs in the night.

Edward sat on the edge of their king-sized bed, tugging Bella between his legs with a soft smile. Jasper laughed quietly as Bella stumbled, wrapping his arms around her waist once more as he stood behind her, brushing her hair off her neck and pressing his lips against the soft skin. Bella sighed softly and leaned back into Jasper, as Edward's hands slipped under the hem of the tank top she was wearing under one of Jasper's ruined dress shirts, unbuttoned with the sleeves rolled up.

Bella's curves had softened somewhat through the years and with pregnancies, but Jasper knew he wasn't in the exact same shape he'd been in ten years earlier, either, though he still ran every morning. Though she'd been self conscious about her body, Edward and Jasper had both made sure to reassure her at every opportunity that she was still beautiful and that they loved her.

She still squirmed when Edward found just the right places to tease with his fingertips, and Jasper focused on the places on her neck, shoulders, and collarbone that made her breathless. Throughout their years together they had more than intimately learned each other's bodies, but that hardly kept them from exploring. More often than not, with a young child in the house, it was rushed, stolen moments long after his bedtime, when they weren't exhausted from chasing him around.

Bella ran her fingers through Edward's hair as he kissed her deeply. He kept it shorter than he used to, and the grey at his temples made him look distinguished, whereas Bella's dark hair sill kept its color, and Jasper's hair had started to darken, leaving it more 'dirty' than blonde, though he still wore it longish.

"Hold that thought," Bella breathed, kissing Edward again quickly. She stepped out of their embrace and crossed to the bathroom, and Jasper sat next to Edward on the bed, kissing him passionately in her absence. Edward moaned softly into the kiss, his hand curled around Jasper's neck as they leaned into each other. Edward's undershirt was soft under Jasper's hands, pressed flat against Edward's still lean body.

The fingers of Edward's other hand plucked at Jasper's dress shirt, where it was still tucked into his jeans; he was the only one of them that hadn't changed after returning home from the barbecue other than taking of his shoes and socks. Jasper broke the kiss and leaned back slightly, easily untucking his shirt and lifting it over his head, leaving himself in jeans and a 'wife beater,' as Bella called them. With an "oomph," Jasper fell back onto the bed as Edward pushed him over with a smile.

Jasper used his position under Edward to tug his t-shirt loose and toss it over the side of the bed, then run his fingers up and down Edward's spine. The scars from Edward's accident had faded, visually, but Jasper could still feel the raised flesh against the sensitive pads of his fingers. There had been a time, about five years previous, when Edward had faced another setback, which had made them seriously consider another surgery. Edward had fought against it and had endured another round of physical therapy, but in the end he'd had to have the surgery anyway. It had been another rough road for them, but they'd pulled through. Edward walked a bit better, though still relied on his cane for his balance most days.

"I thought I told you to hold that thought," Bella said with a bit of a pout as she came back into the room, a bit of light from the bathroom spilling into the bedroom. She'd changed into a small nightgown, a deep blue something that emphasized her bustline and left little to the imagination.

Edward sat up and turned around, causing Jasper's fingers to trail along his skin until Jasper's hands dropped onto the bed, and he used them to push himself up slightly. "I did," Edward said, and Jasper could hear the smile in his voice. "I had a different thought for Jas."

Bella rolled her eyes, but smiled, and joined them on the bed, climbing up at the foot and crawling her way over to them. Jasper took the opportunity to roll off the bed and quickly shed his jeans into a pile on the floor, quickly removing his undershirt as well. When he returned to the bed, Bella was posed over Edward, her knees on the outside of his thighs, his hands lightly on her hips as he kissed her deeply.

Jasper slid up behind Edward, the bedcovers bunching up around them as he pressed his chest to Edward's back, and twined his arms around him and Bella. Jasper nuzzled at Edward's neck as his fingers skimmed over Bella's thighs. When Edward broke the kiss, Jasper leaned over his shoulder to claim Bella's lip for himself, hearing Edward's contented groan at being smushed between the two of them. When Edward wriggled, Jasper backed off, sitting back on his haunches, his hands still on Bella's thighs.

Edward turned to kiss Jasper before his attentions returned to Bella. They kept on with the kissing and touches; making out with his partners never ever got old to Jasper. They fumbled around with each other a bit, trying to keep in contact, though Bella certainly remained at the center that evening. In part of their rougher times, she'd been worried that he and Edward would decide that she was just a fling, and they often sought to reassure her that it wasn't true, that she and Tony were the center of their world, and that just because Edward and Jasper had been first didn't mean that they didn't love her any less or differently.

"Tell me what you want, love?" Edward asked, his lips red and shiny against the stained pink column of Bella's throat.

"I want you both," Bella said softly, her breathing heavy.

Jasper nodded, scraping his teeth lightly over the pulse point in her neck. Edward reached for the drawer in the nightstand where they kept the smaller supplies for their intimate moments. Their foreplay continued as they situated themselves, hands wandering over skin, soft noises carrying through the room as they were conscious of the small being living on the upper floor.

The rest of their clothes quickly joined the others on the floor, and they continued their insistent teasing of each other's bodies. Jasper accepted the lube from Edward with a heated kiss and he focused on making sure Bella was well prepared for him. In front of Bella, Edward's face was buried between her breasts as his hands curled around her thighs, thumbs circling closer and closer to her core. Her entire body flushed pink with her arousal, Edward and Jasper's responding eagerly as well.

"Ready darlin?" Jasper breathed against her ear. She nodded tightly, and Jasper held her hips as she rose up slightly on her knees. Jasper centered himself beneath her, and guided her down gently, one hand wrapped around the base of his cock as she settled, causing them both to moan softly.

They shifted position carefully, and Bella gasped, a slight whimper on the sound as Edward entered her from the other side.

"So good," Bella gasped quietly, her hands locked on Edward's shoulders for stability.

Jasper could feel Edward moving in counterpoint to his own rhythm, separated only by a thin wall of flesh. Bella's head tipped back against Jasper's shoulder and she kissed his jaw and collarbone before lifting her head and kissing Edward deeply. Her quiet mewl of pleasure was swallowed by the kiss.

They moved together in a synchronicity borne of long familiarity. Jasper held to Bella's hip with one hand, his other circling around in front to tease at her clit, his knuckles brushing Edward's cock as they moved together. Bella pushed her hips back against Jasper, meeting his thrusts from behind before she rocked forward to meet Edward.

Bella came with a quiet gasp, her head slumping forward onto Edward's shoulder. Jasper's fingers continued to move in her, prolonging her release as Edward's motions became slightly less controlled. Jasper was close, Bella's body tightening around him in the wake of her own orgasm triggering his, and then Edward's in short order.

They lay together for a few minutes, their breathing ragged, tender touches and kisses exchanged between the three of them as their hearts calmed.

Bella groaned softly as she shifted, stretching her limbs. Jasper laughed softly, kissing her forehead as he also shifted, rolling onto his side before tugging her back against his chest as he nuzzled against her. Edward joined them, scooting down slightly in the bed to place his cheek against Bella's chest, throwing his leg over both of theirs, his arm draped over their waists.

They snuggled together for a few minutes until Bella wiggled to get up. She crossed back to the bathroom, naked and unselfconscious, and closed the door behind her. Jasper heard water running as Edward moved over to fill the void she'd left in the bed. Jasper smiled and kissed him softly, running his fingers lightly through his hair.

Edward heaved a sigh. "It's still early," he muttered. "I should go finish up a few things for tomorrow," he said.

Jasper nodded. He also had work he could finish, and he doubted that Bella would be coming straight back to bed after she cleaned up. "Yeah," he echoed, kissing Edward again. "Or, we could just blow it off and stay here," he suggested.

Edward laughed softly and tilted his face up to kiss Jasper. The kiss lingered for a moment. "Tempting as that sounds," he said regretfully.

"I know, babe," Jasper agreed. They remained for a few more moments, until the water shut off in the bathroom. Jasper kissed Edward again and they pulled apart, rolling off opposite sides of the bed. Edward pulled on his same pair of pajama pants while Jasper pulled clean ones from the bureau.

Bella emerged from the bathroom, her hair twisted up in a bun on top of her head, tendrils lose around her face, her robe belted around her waist. She pouted at them.

"What?" Jasper asked.

"I kinda hoped you'd talk me into staying in bed," she said, crossing to him and bumping his hip with her own as she fished out a pair of cotton capris pajama pants and a matching tank top.

Jasper kissed her. "Later," he said in her ear and swatted her backside.

She giggled and dressed, tossing her robe onto the foot of the bed, and once he was dressed, Jasper followed her and Edward out of their bedroom. Bella disappeared into the kitchen, while Edward and Jasper made their way down to the hall to the office space they shared. It was cramped, but cozy, with three desks, a couch and a small play area set up for Tony in the corner.

Bella joined them after a few minutes, her regular evening cup of tea in her hands as she took her desk and started working on her computer. Jasper checked his email then put the finishing touches on the things he needed for class the next day while Edward, Jasper presumed, did the same.

A couple of hours later, Bella sat up a bit straighter and stretched with a yawn, pulling Jasper out of the textbook he was reviewing . "Bedtime?" he asked.

"Mm," she acknowledged.

Edward looked up from a score, tugging the headphones from his ears. "What?"

"We're going to bed. You almost done?" Jasper asked, setting his computer to sleep mode for the night.

Edward nodded. "Half-hour or so."

Bella rose and crossed to Edward's desk, kissing him softly. Edward returned it and smiled, slipping his headphones back on as Bella and Jasper slipped out of the office.

Jasper went through the bathroom as Bella crawled into bed, curling up around her pillow in the middle. Jasper joined her, after turning on the bedside lamps and making sure the baby monitor was still turned on (they'd been careful, but there were a few times where their love making had gotten a bit – rigorous). Bella shifted and curled up against him as he pulled on his newly prescribed reading glasses and the novel he was half-way through. He read as he waited for Edward to come to bed, idly stroking through the hair Bella had let down for bed.

After half an hour, Edward still hadn't come to bed, and Jasper's eyes were heavy. He shut off his light and slid down in the bed after putting aside his glasses and book. Bella sighed happily against him as he curled toward her, prepared for sleep, the light on Edward's side of the bed still on. It wasn't unusual for one of them to linger over work in the evenings.

Jasper was dozing when he felt the bed dip, and the light against his eyelids went out. "'Ward?"

"Yeah, lost track of time. Go back to sleep," Edward said softly.

Jasper felt lips against his and smiled as Bella murmured something in response to probably her own kiss. Warm and content, Jasper let himself slip deeper into sleep, feeling Edward's hand lightly on his hip, Bella's easy breathing against his own.

Jasper was home.

* * *

Thank you all so very much for riding this train with me. I know it's been a long journey; I've been writing these characters for close to a year and a half, and they're based somewhat on original characters I began developing in 2003. Posting the story has taken just over a year. I'm so glad that you've all found as much love for these characters as I have.

Fandom Gives Back: Eclipse kicks off in a couple of weeks - if there's an outtake you'd particularly like to see, why not think about making a donation to a great cause and make me write it? ;) I'll also have a few hand-crafted items up for bid.


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